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Days turned into weeks, into months, into years. There wasn't a day that went by that you didn't miss Eddie Munson with all your being. However, you knew you had to move on with your life. In college you met John, a guy with whom you shared several classes and went out with him and a group of friends for coffee every Friday, to talk about their lives, little by little you were meeting more people getting to have a group of friends with whom you shared everything. In November of your first year in college you decided not to return to Hawkins, maybe it was the fear of seeing Eddie or maybe you had convinced yourself that it was not the best idea to return to the past, so you spent all your vacations in your dorm which you shared with a roommate.
After a few months you and John started dating. He was everything you wanted in someone to be with you for the rest of your years, but you couldn't help but miss Eddie, sometimes you would wake up and dream of going to the kitchen of your apartment and meeting your best friend but it always ended in disappointment to find John instead.
Time went on and you were able to finish school and graduate. In a moment of courage you sent invitations to Robin, Steve and Eddie. Days later, at your graduation you were reunited with your best friend who arrived with an older looking Vicky besides her, Steve arrived in the middle of the ceremony but in time to see you go up to the stage and receive your diploma, when he saw you he only stood up with Robin to raise his arms and salute you while they celebrated for you. On that day John and Robin met.
"Meh, you're not as cute as Tom Cruise" Robin commented as she lifted her shoulders, Vicky and Steve tried to shut her up while John just laughed at the comment and nodded. You swore that seeing them all together would fill a hole in your heart. But it didn't, a part of you was trying not to cry at the disappointment.
Eddie didn’t went.
That same night you said goodbye to your friends and together with John you went to an apartment you both had rented in New York that you soon made your own as the weeks went by. There were days when you were happy as you wrote and lived life to the fullest. But there were other moments, where the city lights were accompanied by raindrops, when you thought of Eddie the most, remembering the times you had spent together, thinking of the laughs you had shared and the glances that went unnoticed by the rest to end with the sad memory of the last time you both spoke. Many sleepless nights you wondered why you hadn't waited a few more seconds, why you hadn't stopped to talk, why you hadn't just listened.
Soon you managed to publish your first book, the process was hard but not impossible and one day you finally had it in your hands. As you looked at it you felt John's presence congratulating you, but you only thought about how strange that moment felt. There was no doubt that you were happy, but you also knew that you wanted to live this part of your life together with your best friend. You had never felt so lonely as you did in that moment that should have been filled with happiness.
Years continued to pass quickly, you continued to publish several books and make your name known to people who enjoyed reading. At the celebration for your last book John gave a speech talking about how special you were and ended up getting down on one knee and asking you to marry him in front of the rest of the guests, who applauded with excitement when they saw the ring in the hand of the man in front of you. It was not the way you would have wanted to be asked to marry but you did not hesitate to say yes. The rest of your cold October days passed quietly until a letter arrived in all greens and oranges.
'86' Gen we invite you to the Hawkins High School Alumni Reunion. Don't miss!'
Your heart pounded at the thought of returning to Hawkins, returning to the town that saw you grow up and the one you hadn't visited in the last ten years. Noticing the date of the reunion you decided to quickly pack your bag, plan your trip and pause the lectures you had scheduled. John could only see you going from one place to another getting organized.
By the time it was time to leave, you were all set to return and meet up with your old colleagues. Hopefully Steve and Robin would be there too.
"Sure you don't want me to come with you?" John asked from his desk, sheets in hand ready to be sorted to form his concept to create his new book. You looked at him with a smile and shook your head.
"I'd like to go alone, see my friends, cry while we drown ourselves in alcohol and remember everything we lived through" you joked causing John to let out a serious laugh as he nodded. Your fiancé got up leaving his writing on the desk and walked over to you to kiss you.
"Remember I'm just a phone call away" He commented softly making you nod. You both shared one more kiss then parted, you grabbed your suitcase and left the apartment to head to your car.
The drive to Hawkins was too long, almost 12 hours on the road was not easy but you needed to see all that had changed in the last 10 years. The ring on your finger was shining thanks to the sun's rays coming through your window. You could perfectly remember the scenery around you as you drove into town. Many places you knew had closed, other buildings had lost their color and there weren't many people on the street anymore, everything looked grayer.
Or maybe you got used to the crazy life in New York.
You passed in front of the high school and could see several people arranging the gymnasium for the meeting that was going to happen that night, even the school looked smaller than you remembered. Arriving at the small hotel you booked a room and started to get ready, opting to wear a formal black dress for the occasion. Your nerves were growing as the time to leave for the meeting approached, the cold night did not take long to cool down the town. The walk to the school was short, from outside you could see the lights illuminate the place and the music created the atmosphere welcoming all those who wanted to enter.
"There's my favorite writer" shouted a voice making you turn around quickly. Robin stood behind you with a smile on her face, still wearing her favorite patterned jacket, ripped jeans and black Docs. The woman rushed up to you and caught you in her arms, you let out a laugh as you hugged her anyway. You had missed your best friend. Behind her was Vicky, who you quickly recognized by her reddish hair, as you separated from Robin you approached Vicky to greet her.
"At least one of us followed with her love" you jokingly commented causing another voice to join the group.
"Oh shut it, where's Johnny boy?" turning around you found Steve as he stuck his hands in his pants pockets and slowly approached. You gave a little yelp of joy and rushed over to the man to hug him and then were pulled in by Robin who wrapped Steve in a huge hug. You finally felt like you had come home.
“He stayed at home. I wanted to come alone” You answered while bringing your hand to your ear to move your hair to get a better view of your friends.
Vicky, upon seeing the ring on your finger let out a scream and hugged you again excitedly causing Robin and Steve to separate strangely, you only raised your left hand to show them the ring that adorned it causing them both to approach to congratulate you. The four of you started walking towards the gym as you talked about what had happened since you last saw each other.
"I knew it, you are going to have cute babies, I called it since highschool " Robin commented making you let out a laugh.
As you entered the place you noticed several of their former classmates who were chatting animatedly amongst themselves. It wasn't long when Robin let out a loud 'Hey!' while pointing with both hands, meters away from her were Nancy accompanied by a nice dressed Jonathan, your best friend grabbed Vicky and Steve's arms to run towards the couple, leaving you alone for a few seconds.
"Hey" Said an unmistakable voice behind you making you take a big breath of air and then turn around.
Eddie Munson stood in front of you after 10 years of not seeing him. He was taller now, you could notice a few more tattoos, he had cut his hair and grown a beard. His eyes were still the same, among the brown shades you could notice a familiar twinkle.
"Hey..." you muttered as you watched him, you didn't know what else to say, after all their last talk was the fight that had separated them. Eddie shoved his hands into the pockets of his leather jacket and swayed slowly trying to figure out what to say.
"How are you?" Said the man in front of you in a shaky voice. Eddie had missed you like crazy and to think that this was the first time you had spoken in a long time didn't help with his nerves. His question surprised you.
"All fine and nice" You turned to look at the decorated gym for a few moments then turned to see Eddie looking at you with a feeling you couldn't recognize. "Ten years already? How fast life goes by" you tried to make conversation but to no avail as you saw that Eddie was still silent. The air around him was tense and you didn't know what else to do.
"I've missed you so much ink" Eddie muttered using your old nickname causing a small pressure in your body. You couldn't hold back any longer so you moved in for a hug taking the man by surprise. However it didn't take long for him to wrap his arms around you.
"I missed you way more" you commented on his shoulder as you hugged him even tighter. You had waited for this moment for years and it had finally arrived. "What have you done? So many years you had to do something with your life" you joked as you pulled away from him. Eddie shrugged his shoulders.
"Would you believe me if I told you I´m a teacher here in Hawkins high school?" his comment made your eyes widen in surprise as the man nodded with a smile. "All my years of pissing off teachers are now coming back to me" he continued making you push him away as you laughed. Eddie came back next to you and continued. "But music club teacher!"
"No way!" you put your hands on your cheeks as you kept smiling. "You are what you swore to destroy!" you let out a laugh. "And the rest? Gareth? Jeff? The boys?" you asked.
"Gareth is a psychologist, can you believe it?" he asked as he held out his hands. You just nodded.
"Gareth was always a good listener" you commented to him as Eddie nodded. At last comfort between the two of you had returned.
"But he always gave shitty advices" Eddie commented causing you to let out a laugh. "I think Jeff went on with his dad's business, I haven't talked to him in years. The boys are still studying, sometimes I see them when they come to visit" you looked at him intently as he told you about the rest of your friends. Both of your eyes sparkled like they hadn't for years.
"I´m an author Eddie" you commented to him with a certain pride inside you. Eddie nodded as he looked at you with a small smile.
"I've read all your books" His comment surprised you. The man noticing your surprise continued. "Since I knew I had to go to the store and buy them. I recognized many things that you wrote in your books from those times you used to tell me your ideas" your eyes became crystalline when you listened to him, so many years and he still remembered the conversations you had in the same way you remembered those moments you spent together.
Seconds later you heard some shouting thanks to the reunions that were happening so you couldn't hear Eddie. The man pointed to the door while moving his lips, you only nodded and then followed him to a quieter place. Eddie opened the door for you letting you out into the dark night first and then following you. As he closed the door everything around you became silent giving you a chance to talk quietly.
"You know? I wanted to see you at my graduation" you commented as you turned to look at the sky, the stars were expectant of whatever was to come through this talk. Your arms folded across your chest trying to conserve the warmth that was escaping thanks to the cold Indiana nights. "I sent you an invitation and everything."
Eddie, noticing that you were cold, began to take off his jacket and then drape it over your shoulders in an attempt to shelter you. It still smelled like him, as if the years had not passed.
"I don't live in the trailer anymore" He commented gravely as he looked down at his hands, his fingers still bruised thanks to still playing the guitar. "I don't live there since Wayne died five years ago."
You turned to look at him quickly as your eyes glazed over, Eddie kept turning to face him trying to remain strong in the face of the news.
"How?" seeing that Eddie didn't answer you moved closer to him only to notice his eyes shining and his grimace trying not to break at that moment. "Oh Eddie."
The man only ducked his head as tears fell. He hadn't cried for Wayne in a long time but telling you the news - someone Wayne considered his daughter - reopened the wound Eddie thought had already healed. You reached out and hugged him, causing Eddie to lean into you, embracing the support you were giving him at that moment. In your throat you could feel a lump in your throat at the thought that Wayne was no longer with you. You would have called, you would have asked for him.
You would have gone back to Hawkins.
"I'm so sorry" you whispered making Eddie shake his head, after all it wasn't your fault, but the knowledge that Eddie had been alone these past few years completely tore you apart.
Minutes later Eddie pulled away from you to take a breath of air and then let it out, feeling better now that you were next to him. You just held one of his arms and leaned into it as a sort of half hug.
"But hey, I already have an apartment and I'm independent, let's be positive" Eddie commented trying to make you laugh, which he accomplished with ease. You had never forgotten how easy it was for Eddie to make you happy, it was like a gift he had perfected over the years. You continued to lean on Eddie thinking about the years you hadn't seen each other.
"All this time I thought you didn't go to my graduation because you hated me for what had happened" You commented loud enough so Eddie could hear it clearly. The man only turned his head away a little so he could see you, his eyebrows almost touching because of the frown on his face.
"Hate you? I would be incapable of hating you" He commented as he placed one of his hands on your shoulders to bring you as close to him as possible. Determined, Eddie took a big breath ready to confess. "I can't hate you because I love you."
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
He had finally said it, and it only took 15 years to do it.
You quickly backed away from him as you watched Eddie's face begin to droop.
"You can't do that," you finally said, anger beginning to take over your mind. "No...you can't come to...to...to tell me that you love me Eddie. Not like that" you claimed as you pointed your finger at his chest. "Not when I'm about to get married" Eddie nodded slowly, but he couldn't stay another day keeping what he felt, the news of your engagement hurt something inside Eddie in a deep way, after all he confessed his feelings too late.
But Eddie couldn´t stop there.
"I've always been in love with you (y/n)" The man in front of you confessed seriously making you let out a sarcastic smile at what was happening. You paced back and forth trying to control the fury you felt. Eddie just watched your reaction. It wasn't until a few minutes later that you stopped to put your hands on your face and wanted to scream.
Just like 10 years ago.
With speed you put your hands down and looked at Eddie angrily then approached him with large strides.
"And why didn't you tell me before? Why didn't you look for me? I always looked for you when we were kids, I always followed you when we were teenagers and just for once I wanted you to look for me. To follow me" You began to raise your voice as your breathing quickened and you walked around the man again. After years you were finally telling Eddie Munson all the questions that had lingered in your mind.
"I did" Eddie muttered as he watched you continue to talk.
"But I didn't even manage to get...what?" you turned to look at him quickly to see if you had heard correctly. The man in front of you dropped his shoulders as if he was carrying all the weight in the world, at the same time wetting his lips with his tongue preparing to finally say what he had done years ago.
"The same year you got into Columbia I went looking for you, to tell you how much I've loved you all these years" he confessed as he looked into your eyes. Thousands of thoughts were going through your mind at that moment, your throat closed and your eyes looked lost, as if you wanted to remember seeing Eddie in Columbia.
"But you never... surely you never found me, you would have said something" You answered in a desperate way, what Eddie had said fell like a bucket of cold water as you kept thinking of other possibilities as to why you hadn't seen him. The man wore a sad smile as he let out the air he was holding in.
"I always found you, every year I managed find you, it was like something was leading me to you. I would see you through the window but you never turned around" You could feel a lump forming in your throat, tears were beginning to fill your eyes and you had never wanted to cry as much as you did at that moment as you cursed yourself for not looking.
"Every year?" was all you could ask, then you bit your bottom lip trying to stop the sob that wanted to escape from you. Eddie only nodded as his eyes began to form a crystalline film over them.
"All the years you were in college I went to see you. I needed to see you, to know that you were okay, that you were happy" You closed your eyes as you heard his answer, tears rolled down your cheeks as you imagined Eddie looking for you, watching you from his car, traveling hours to just see you, but not to get close.
"Why...why didn't you talk to me? Why did you think it was a good idea not to tell me?" Your choppy breathing made it harder and harder to speak but you wanted to know. You needed to know. Eddie shook his head as he closed his eyes tightly letting small tears escape.
"I couldn't..." He took a breath of air. "Whenever I met you, you were always surrounded by people, and I don't doubt it, you always brighten the life of anyone who gets close to you. Your smile was huge as you chatted and waved your hands. I'm sure it was about something exciting, you always waved them when you told me something excited" Eddie let out a small laugh as he remembered those moments where they were both happy as children. "I couldn't risk approaching you and asking you to come back with me to Hawkins to give up your dream. I wouldn't forgive myself."
Your hands came up to your face to remove the moisture from it caused by the small droplets coming from your eyes. The ring on your finger felt heavy and wrong now that you knew the truth. Eddie likewise ran one of his hands across his cheeks, a sign of anxiety he had adopted since he was a kid.
"I would have picked you" you mumbled in embarrassment, it was like you were back in high school again remembering the times you talked to him and he made you blush. Eddie smiled through his tears
"I know."
They were both silent as they tried to compose themselves, the truth had never hurt as much as it did in those moments, which came 10 years later causing deeper pain. They had both moved on with their lives, they had accomplished things they would have loved to share with each other. But fate tends to be cruel and separate the most in love lovers that ever walked the earth just for the sake of entertainment.
Eddie was the first to be able to recover, he took his hand away from your face to see you better. Even 10 years later and with a noticeable change due to age, he could still see that little girl of 12 who brightened his afternoons, he could still see that young girl who dreamed of flying high for her dreams. Now in front of him was a woman who had achieved everything she was looking for, even finding love, even if it was not with him.
The man approached and gently moved your hands so he could see your shining eyes. Eddie smiled softly and placed his hands on your cheeks to look at you.
"Wayne would be proud of you" he murmured with a soft smile as he wiped away the tears that were still falling from your face with his thumbs. "I'm proud of you."
You just grabbed his wrists to pull his hands away from your face and moved in for a hug. After so many years you still missed hugging him, being close to him, feeling his body against yours and being able to feel his arms around you. Eddie put his head on top of yours as if he wanted to protect you from everything outside. Or maybe he wanted to hide you next to him so you could stay together longer.
"You didn't deserve an idiot like me, you deserved so much more" Eddie murmured over your head. "In another life I could have given you everything" you pulled away a little to see him as he had done.
"I wouldn't want everything. In another life I would have loved to just live in an apartment with you and listen to you play your guitar over and over and over again" You smiled as Eddie's eyes formed a crystalline layer of tears again. The man let out a ragged gasp of air then leaned in close and left a small kiss on your forehead.
"I love you (y/n)" Eddie murmured while his lips were still close to your forehead.
"I love you too Eddie" You took Eddie by his cheeks so you could look directly into his eyes. "But I'm in love with John."
Eddie nodded again, understanding who you meant. Heartbroken he reached over and gave you one last kiss on the forehead and then pulled away from you. The man put one hand behind his back and the other pointed towards the school gym doors, re-adopting the little performances he did in high school.
"After you, pretty lady" he mentioned in a deep voice making you let out a laugh, causing a spark of happiness inside Eddie's chest that he hadn't felt for 10 years. You just nodded as you put a hand on your chest continuing to play along.
"Thank you very much sir" The man put his arm in front of you for you to take and you both walked towards the rest of the party. You didn't take more than five steps when you stopped causing Eddie to stop as well. "You like people who read Stephen King, don't you?" you commented remembering the fight they had had in the coffee shop years ago. Eddie just smiled.
"No, I love them" he replied as he wrinkled his nose for a couple of seconds. The smile that appeared on your face cheered Eddie up strongly. Maybe his heart was hurting at that moment, but he knew that together with you everything was going to get better.
After all, Eddie Munson was invincible when his best friend was by his side.