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Meet me outside.
It lacked the grandeur of Matt's unsent texts. Then again, they couldn't have been that good if he kept deleting them. No, this was direct and to the point in the way that Adam seemed to be now. He was no longer the quiet fifth wheel of the Elite. He was the Elite, Matt thought.
Matt took the elevator down to the ground floor of the hotel with his phone clutched tight in his hand. Maybe it was the post-show haze that had him acting like this—running into the dark without a plan—but it was too late for plans with the way his lungs had gotten caught in his throat.
So many unspoken conversations ran through Matt's head. Every door he had never opened, every touch he had never given, every glance he had pulled away from.
The door shuddered open, revealing the pitch black night through tall glass windows. and plush red curtains. At that moment, the hotel Matt had barely given a second glance became a castle of golden light, and stood on the front steps, brightest of all, was Adam—still wearing his embroidered blue jeans.
There weren't words for feelings like this. An indescribable look crossed Matt's face. Adam mirrored it, beckoning him over wordlessly.
"Hi," Adam's voice was rough and warm. Matt had missed that voice, stuck with the anger and hurt of having only spoken publicly for so long.
"Adam—"
"Come with me?" The cowboy asked.
"Where?"
"On a ride. To talk." Adam sounded unsure of himself. How could Adam ever be uncertain, having Matt so tightly wrapped around his finger?
Matt nodded, and Adam pushed open the door. The cool night breeze washed over them both like cold water. Adam's truck was parked in the fire lane.
"I just pulled up, I wasn't just parked here like a dick," Adam rambled. It was the Adam Matt remembered, desperately filling every quiet space with words.
"No Tesla?" He asked. Adam shrugged.
"Thought I'd go for something a bit more casual," He fiddled with his keys. "Hop in."
The truck was as nice as any other truck Matt had been in, but something about it belonging to his friend made it feel nicer. It made the odd country cd collection sweet and the busted leather seats charming. Adam left the windows down as he pulled out and began to drive.
"Where are we going?" Matt asked.
"Not sure yet," Adam confessed. Blindly, he tossed a handful of disks to Matt. "Pick something. I hate driving without music."
"About earlier tonight..." Matt began. Adam kept his eyes on the road. Silence filled the truck.
Matt looked over the albums, before landing on one he wasn't familiar with. A cowboy in a mask with long tassels. It reminded him of a luchador's mask. He popped it into the player.
"I love this song," Adam smiled.
"I've missed that," Matt thought out loud.
"Missed what?"
"Your smile."
Adam's face faltered, but the hint of a smile still sat on his lips.
"We're almost there," He assured, tapping the steering wheel.
Houses turned to trees and highways to a one-way road as Adam weaved through the backroads.
"Where are we?" Matt asked.
"A cemetery, I think?"
"Found the perfect spot to murder me?" He half-joked.
"I don't want to kill you," Adam said without a hint of humor. "I just want to talk. 'Just have to find the right place to stop."
"When's that gonna be? In an hour? A week? A month?"
Adam sighed, slowing down and pulling over to the side of the road. The lights in the car flickered off and the music was cut short. The moon sunk down through the arms of drooping trees, green, blue, and black dancing in the night.
"It's not my fault we're in the middle of Ohio..."
The sound of the night outside was unfamiliar. Cicadas chirped in long, shrill beats and the darkness hummed. Matt could just make out the outline of Adam's face in the dim light—the curls that fell over his forehead and the slope of his nose, the fullness of his lips.
"Thank you for saving Nick and me."
Adam shrugged.
"Adam, why are we here?"
"Because I was scared to talk at the hotel? I don't know,"
"The feeling's mutual. When I first saw you from the elevator I was terrified."
"Why?"
"Because... Because I see the worst in people. I bring it out in everyone—Nick, Kenny, Cole—but not you. Never you. I was afraid that maybe if I finally started talking to you again, I'd ruin you."
"You thought I was going to hurt you?"
"I thought I was going to hurt you. That the moment I didn't know what to say I'd just fall back on being mean."
"Like Kenny?" Adam looked at him with piercing blue eyes.
"Yeah, just like Kenny."
His shoulders loosened with the response, tension leaking out of him as he leaned back in the driver's seat.
"Do you know why I asked to leave the Elite back then?" He asked.
"Because we treated you terribly?"
"Because I knew that for as long as you wanted me to stay, I would. I could never walk away from you."
His words cut through Matt like a knife, he knew what love like that felt like, he knew how much it could change you.
"I wish we could be happy. Like the old days but better. I wish we could just start over and treat you right. At least, I wish I could."
"How do Nick and Kenny feel?"
"I hope Nick feels the same. Kenny, I don't know..."
"Matt?" The sound of his voice on Adam's lips was heavenly. All of this was becoming too much. Too much like a dream, he'd wake up only to face the reality that he'd lost that connection to Adam forever.
"Yes?"
"Why did you come here?"
But this wasn't a dream. He didn't have the luxury of biting his tongue.
"Because I could never walk away from you," He whispered almost breathlessly into the dark.
He knew they were looking at each other and he could feel Adam's gaze on him. And before he could stop to consider he was leaning over the console and meeting the cowboy's lips.
Matt pulled back immediately, his face on fire, only for Adam to grab him by the shoulders and pull him back in. His mouth was warm and inviting and the brunette melted into the kiss, eyes fluttering shut.
Adam's heavy hands sprawled over Matt's ribs, pulling him in closer, only for the other man's knee to bang the clutch. Adam pulled back first, leaving Matt to breathe in his arms. Adam thanked his lucky stars that he couldn't see well in the darkness. The view of Matt in his arms, lips red, eyes blown wide, would have quite possibly killed him. It would have been difficult to focus on driving back to the hotel at the very least.
Matt's breathing was still heavy. Heavy and... shaky.
"Matt?" Adam reached out to cup his face and felt a tear meet his hand. "Oh my god, is your knee okay?"
"No! I mean, my knee is fine, I just—" Matt hiccuped as he wiped his face. "I just missed you so much and I didn't understand why—"
Adam wrapped his arms around Matt and held him close as the older man shook through the last of his tears.
"Don't ever let me be stupid enough to lose you again," Matt whispered into his chest.
"I don't know... as long as you don't let me be stupid enough to try. Deal?" Matt looked up at him, the moonlight finally catching him, and God did he look beautiful. Dark brown eyes framed with long, wet lashes stared up into his own, his face framed by his long, dark hair. Adam carded his finger through it before placing one final kiss on the other man's lips.
"Deal," Matt whispered back, voice sore. "Can we go back to the hotel now? I don't want to be murdered in a cemetery."
"A cemetery in Ohio," Adam reminded him.
"Oh God, get me out of here."