Chapter Text
If anyone had asked Alan how long he had been sitting besides his son’s crib, he wouldn’t have been able to give an answer. He had woken up in a cold sweat at some point in the night, the images from his nightmare replaying in the darkness of his bedroom while Ellie slept peacefully beside him. Once he had assured himself that nothing was lurking in the corners of the bedroom, he had silently left the bed and made his way to the nursery. And that’s where he had been for however much time had passed since the absolute terror and panic his nightmare had induced.
As much as he wanted to hold Jack in an effort to further himself away from the nightmare, he knew it would only end in the three month old waking up; it hadn’t taken too long for Jack to settle into a sleep schedule, but the slightest of movements would pull the infant from the deepest of sleeps. So instead he had sat in the chair and watched his son sleep, his eyes trained on the gentle rise and fall of Jack’s chest.
“Did he wake up?”
Alan jumped slightly at the sound of Ellie’s soft voice, glancing over as she reached his side. He took a deep breath and looked back at their son as Ellie gently ran her fingers through his hair.
“No. I just…I couldn’t sleep.” he said softly, and he knew she would be able to hear the slight tremor in his voice.
There was a moment before he heard the soft sigh and suddenly Ellie was in his lap, her arms wrapped around him as she softly kissed his temple. They sat in silence for a few moments and watched as Jack slept peacefully, unaware of his parents sitting next to his crib. A small smile appeared on Alan’s face at the quiet sound Jack made in his sleep, his legs moving just enough to pull down the light blanket covering his body.
“Seems like he takes after you with not wanting to be covered up.” he said in an attempt to lighten the mood.
“You’re the one who’s the furnace when we sleep. Why would I want my body heat when I can just steal yours?” Ellie teased lightly, and he was glad she realized what he was trying to do.
“I think you just use that as an excuse to get me to cuddle.” He turned his head enough to look at Ellie, a slight smirk on his face.
She looked at him and rolled her eyes playfully as she shook her head slightly. He turned his attention back to their sleeping son and he tried to ignore the images from his nightmare that flashed in his mind; there was no point in thinking about what had woken him up, not when his son was clearly sleeping and his fiancée was sitting on his lap. It seemed no matter what he did to remind himself that what he had witnessed in his sleep had not been reality, he couldn’t seem to shake the typical feelings that clung to him following his nightmares.
It had been like this every night for nearly a week, and Alan was beginning to feel the way he had in the months following that weekend on Isla Nublar. He was feeling himself pulling away in an effort to not worry Ellie, especially now that they were parents; she didn’t need to worry about his trauma when they had a three month old to look after. However, he knew better than to give any type of credit to those thoughts. He had already made that mistake once, and he had nearly lost Ellie over it.
“What woke you up?” he asked as he turned to look at her again, part of him afraid she had had her own nightmare and he hadn’t been there to comfort her.
“I was trying to snuggle with my personal furnace, and you weren’t there.” she answered with that teasing smile. “What was it tonight?”
He glanced back at Jack and sighed softly, his fingers lightly tapping her hip to let her know he was going to stand up. Once they both were back on their feet, Alan grabbed her hand and tilted his head back towards the door of the nursery. He led her to the kitchen and made sure not to run into any of the boxes they had yet to unpack, wondering why they thought moving into a new house two weeks before Christmas was a smart idea.
Ellie flicked on the light switch and watched as Alan paced slightly, clearly working something out in his mind. He took a breath and turned to face her just as she leaned against the counter.
“It was raptors.” he began, running his fingers through his hair. “They somehow got into the house and you…the only thing I could do was run to get Jack. But as soon as I got to the nursery, the raptors were…I needed to make sure he was breathing when I woke up.”
He watched the display of emotions on his fiancée’s face and looked away for a brief moment. The only sound in the kitchen was the soft ticking of the clock near the table to his right until he heard Ellie softly say his name, so softly that he nearly thought he had imagined it. But one look at her face had assured him that Ellie did say his name, and the look of heartbreak in her eyes was almost enough to make him regret telling her.
“How long have you been having that nightmare?” she asked.
“Almost a week.” he answered, knowing it would be better to be honest. “Sometimes it’s the T-rex instead of the raptors. But it always ends the same.”
Alan looked away as he tried to ignore the images that had been haunting him late at night, the sense of panic and helplessness rising in his chest. He took a deep breath and glanced over when he heard Ellie whisper his name, and the look on her face nearly broke him; he shouldn’t have said anything, not when they had enough on their plates as it was. Of course, he had a feeling that was a factor in his recurring nightmares.
“What do you need me to do, honey?”
He startled slightly when he realized Ellie was right in front of him instead of on the other side of the kitchen, never registering that she had made her way over to him. He opened his mouth but quickly closed it at the pointed look his fiancée gave him, a slightly sheepish smile appearing on his face.
“What do you need me to do?” she repeated.
“I think it’s just stress honestly.” he sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. “It’s Jack’s first Christmas, and your parents are going to be here as well as my mother and…I just want this to be perfect for him.”
“He’s only three months old, honey. We still have a while before he starts forming memories.” Ellie pointed out with a smile. “Whatever happens, it’s still going to be a perfect Christmas.”
“Until your mother says something, and then mine will say something to her and then…” he trailed off at the look Ellie was giving him. “What?”
“Nothing. I just…” she chuckled softly as she shook her head slightly. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you this stressed about being around my mom.”
“That’s not true.” Alan took a step back to properly look at her. “Our first Christmas together when I ended up meeting your family.”
He watched as Ellie narrowed her eyes slightly before a slight blush appeared, although he didn’t miss the wicked glint in her eyes as she recalled that particular night. He couldn’t help but smirk as the memory played in his own mind.
The plan for Christmas Eve had been simple enough- an easy dinner of Chinese takeout with whatever cheap beer Ellie had in her fridge, some cuddling on the couch while they watched some Christmas movies, ending the night in her bed. That’s how the night was intended to go, but nearly an hour after Alan had arrived that plan had gone out the window. There was just something about Ellie wearing the shirt she had stolen from him a few months ago and what she called her “lounging shorts” that made it damn near impossible for him to keep his hands off of her, not that she had minded.
They had somehow managed to keep it together long enough for their dinner to arrive but once they started eating, it had become clear what Ellie’s new plan for the night was. Their usual banter had taken on a tone that only added to the building tension and when she had casually moved her hand to grab him through his jeans, Alan had made the executive decision that they were both done eating.
And that was how he had found himself holding a very naked Ellie Sattler to the wall of her small living room, her legs wrapped tightly around him as he pinned her wrists above her head with one of his hands. He kissed his way down to the crook of her neck and bit just hard enough to leave a faint bruise, smirking at the pleasure filled gasp that his girlfriend had let out. He had briefly wondered if he was being a little too rough with his movements, but the soft whimpers and moans leaving her mouth were all the encouragement he needed to continue the hard pace he had set. He let out a groan when he felt Ellie’s teeth nip along his jaw, his hips slamming into her when she reached his earlobe.
“Alan…” his name left her on a whine as he hit that spot that made her see stars. “Don’t…oh god…don’t stop.”
“Never.” he panted.
He let go of her wrists to tangle his fingers in her hair, tugging with the right amount of force to draw out a small scream of his name that set his blood on fire. Between the noises Ellie was making and the words Alan was whispering, neither of them heard the door to her apartment open. It wasn’t until the shrill shriek of “Ellen Diane Sattler” that both Alan and Ellie realized they were no longer alone.
“Um…hi?” Ellie did her best to not sound out of breath as she looked at the figures of her mother, stepfather, and younger brother standing in her doorway.
Alan kept his gaze fixed on the wall behind Ellie and made sure his body was blocking her naked form from her family, suddenly very glad he only took off his shirt before lifting her against the wall.
“At least they learned to not do surprise visits anymore.” Ellie’s voice pulled him out of the memory, her smile earning an eye roll.
“I’m convinced that night is the reason why your family hates me.” Alan said, doing his best not to reach out to pull Ellie towards him.
“Oh yeah, that’s it. Not the fact that you’re two years older than my mother.” she scoffed lightly.
“It’s why your brother hates me.” he corrected.
Ellie laughed softly before she walked over to him and wrapped her arms around his neck. His hands went to her waist on instinct as she leaned up to kiss him softly, pulling back before he had a chance to deepen it.
“Luckily I don’t hate you.” Ellie teased as she pressed her body against him, smirking at the small groan she was rewarded with.
“I would hope not. Might make things awkward once we get married.” he muttered before pulling her tighter against him.
“You know…we have a perfectly good wall we could put to use.” the words practically came out on a pur.
“And wake up Jack? I don’t think so.” he shook his head even as he pushed his hips against her, enjoying the soft gasp that left Ellie when she felt the effect she had on him.
“I can be quiet.”
Alan leaned back just enough to give her a look that made it clear exactly how much he didn’t believe her, ready to remind her exactly how often their neighbors would complain about the noise level when they had been living in their apartment. However, it seemed as if Ellie had remembered that fact as well before she smirked up at him, one of her hands slowly running down his chest.
“I guess you’ll have to find a way to keep me quiet, Dr. Grant.” she whispered just as her hand reached his very obvious erection.
“You, Ellie Sattler, are going to be the death of me.” he practically growled when her hand slipped under the elastic of his pajama pants.
“But what a way to go.” she grinned, her fingers wrapping around him.
“Ellie…” he breathed as she began stroking him.
The loud cries of their son rang throughout the house, breaking the charged atmosphere of the kitchen. Ellie let out a soft sigh as she removed her hand and looked at Alan as he closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. When he opened his eyes, he noticed the apologetic smile and shook his head.
“Don’t, Ellie. There’s nothing to be sorry about.” he assured her, giving her that soft smile he always gave her.
“I’ll make it up to you.” she promised.
“Nothing to make up for.” he said with a small shake of his head.
Ellie leaned forward and placed a kiss on his chin before making her way to their son, Alan following her after he had calmed himself down. He leaned against the doorframe and watched as his fiancée sat in the armchair by the crib to give Jack his late night feeding, smiling softly when Ellie looked up at him.
“I love you.” he said simply at the questioning look she gave him.
“Sap.” she teased, the love she felt for him shining brightly in her eyes.
He just shrugged slightly as he continued to watch her with Jack, the love he felt for his family clearly written on his face.