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we were so stoned that im surprised i even remember this conversation.
and we were so high, that suddenly i started saying the weirdest stuff. and i couldn't stop myself.
"hey boris, do you know about the multiverse theory?"
"heard about it, why?"
"what if..in some weird other universe we wouldn't be together."
"we would always be together."
"how are you sure?"
"hit me then. give example potter."
i think, about the craziest ideas. far too fiction to be real, but i blurt what i think first.
"its like, 1980 or something. and theres this clown eating monster."
"mhm."
"and you," i look at him. what would be his almost polar opposite version?
"you like arcades.. you wear tropical button downs even when it isn't winter, and your humor sucks."
"are you trying to just diss me now?" he says playfully.
"let me finish." i chortle a laugh. "and i'll be a germ freak. you know, ill carry those fanny packs with medicine. oh, and i probably have asthma."
"is that all? what about the clown eating monster?"
"oh right, then we have this group of friends, and we defeat the monster, probably."
"probably?"
"i dont know. what if it comes back? and it kills me? how will we be together?"
"i will die too."
"but i dont want you to die! you need to be heroic. like, live for me or something."
"then i will visit your grave everyday, i will bring you flowers and read those awful american stories for you potter."
"you bore me."
"maybe thats how you die. because you are too confident."
"i wasnt even trying! still. we wouldnt be together because its 1980 something."
"then i will carve our names into tree, or bridge, or something. super american movie, just for you."
"okay.."
i think again, what else could there possibly be.
"okay, 1980 something again. we are friends and we play dnd."
"only you would play dnd, harry potter."
"stop making nerd references, okay and then i get taken! kidnapped or something."
"i save you."
"uh, no, you cant, because i'm in another dimension."
"potter you are too fiction, these other multiuni-verses would never exist! and, if it did. i would have powers. then save you. satisfied?"
"no, you don't have powers, i dont have powers. but some people have powers."
"why wouldnt we?"
"so you cant save me."
"da. then i will find someone who has powers then save you."
"but what if you like them more than me, and then you fall in love."
"tsk tsk tsk potter. are you not listening? only you."
"but what-"
"but no."
"but you had a girlfriend, like your ex, she could be the one with powers."
i hum to myself after not hearing a direct answer. and in truth, that should not have settled me.
"then obviously, she is not girlfriend anymore. she is ex."
"okay, what if we're- no, you're the grandchild of a ghost...ghost-buster."
boris laughs, "ghost buster?! you are trying too hard"
"no, no no hear me out. and then, but you dont know you are? no? so then you find out, because he has a secret base."
"base?"
"yes, and then, thats in his ugly farmhouse, you live there. but your mom-"
boris looks at me.
"or dad. dont believe you, but there are 100 ghost- um, traps under the house. and you need to fight a demon, ghost, whatever."
"so i fight it, where do you come in?"
"i dunno. maybe i work at a restaurant near a gas station, or something. and we work riding on roller skates."
"fancy.." he chuckles. "so we fall inlove and i am famous, da?"
"no, because i get taken by the demon's pets, dog thing."
"so you are a dog? like popchyk! id still love you."
"no im possessed, and i want to kill you."
"then i will change you."
"ew boris! you're talking like you're right out of a book."
"okey, sorry, still i would love you."
"but i want to kill you."
"then i defeat the demon, get you.. whats word? unpossessed, then save my family."
"what if-"
"moral is, potter, that i will love you, no matter what. in any universe we will love each other."
i turn my head to look at him, both of us still laying still on the floor.
boris stands up, lays on top of me and kisses me on the forehead.
"you fuckin cornball."
"get used to it potter. im with you every -verse."