Chapter Text
James had never liked it nor understood why people explained suicide as 'selfish'. Now, he did understand the cause and effect of it, and how it can affect others in their lives. But to be stuck in a terrifying place, where the only option is to turn on yourself and take your own life, that takes a sadness and resignation like no other.
A sadness and resignation like that, James believed, should have been recognized by friends and family, who then should have done what they could have to make a comforting place for the person who was hurting. People should be so themselves that others aren't afraid to be themselves around them as well.
Though James did understand that some people have no friends or family, or in some cases, no matter how caring and loving their families are, there's nothing they could have done. He didn't know which was worse though, knowing that you could have done something, or knowing that no matter how hard you tried, no matter how much of yourself you sacrificed, it would have no affect.
On a cloudy morning of April 23, 2005, Elisabeth Grace Rodrigo was born to Celeste and Tyler. Celeste had gotten pregnant and that had been the reason for their marriage. The family wanted Elisabeth to be aborted.
This was their first kid, and Tyler being age 21, Celeste being age 19, they were unsure what to do with the little girl. They had another kid 11 months later, Alexander John Rodrigo. They didn't have another kid for three years after Alexander. Elisabeth and Alexander were best friends, playing every day with the hose outside of the trailer house, throwing rocks and cutting the dead grass with scissors.
With Celeste struggling bad with drugs and alcohol, rarely being present, and with Tyler constantly states away every Thursday to Sunday going to trade school, sometimes for even longer, Elisabeth learned very quickly how to take care of herself. Elisabeth brought Alexander with her to preschool to feed him as there was no food at home. She learned how to change Alexanders diaper and when Daniel was born, she changed his too while Celeste slept on the couch or was out in town with her friends.
Sometimes the only food they had was the dead grass outside, or stolen food from the neighbors. Elisabeth had been known to eat dead bugs here and there if her desperation was strong enough.
Tyler was a scary man. Elisabeth was taught to love her family no matter what, but she had always been scared of the screaming and throwing. Finding little games to play, she'd take her mind off of the memories of the night before, her mother yelling at her to go to the neighbors and call the police as she was on the ground sobbing. Elisabeth just stood with a panicked stare, unable to move.
Celeste also had many boyfriends, even when she was married to Tyler. He was always far away at school and work, never able to be home. He didn't want to know what his wife was doing; Abuse, kidnapping/abduction, molestation, rape, child abandonment, starvation, amongst other things, were a regular occurrence in their small trailer house in a dusty trailer park in a Montanan native reservation.
At age five, Tyler asked Elisabeth if she wanted to move to Washington with her grandparents, without her drug addicted mother. She said yes. They left that morning, taking Alex and Daniel, leaving Celeste asleep in the room. Tyler did not reach out for half a year before he brought her to a rehab in Oregon, where she stayed for ten years.