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Awakening is always a lottery.
It can come gently and slowly, like dawn on a foggy morning, or it can throw you out of sleep and leave you suffocating like a fish on the shore. V knows just a little about fish, she saw them only on TV, and in the window of that expensive pet store in Wellspring, where children from the Heywood slums were not allowed. No, she isn’t a fish expert at all, but this feeling of two realms exchanging places without asking you, leaving you helplessly opening and closing your mouths, oh, she knows this feeling too well.
V even got into her code and threw out of settings anything but pleasant awakenings... and after a couple of weeks, she went into a steep dive, straight into a severe case of body dissociation.
“The monotony is unnatural,” Goro reminded her when V was fine again. She, of course, argued with him, but only a little, just to give him some hard time. He was right, and she got those abrupt awakenings back.
Today she’s lucky in the lottery: the dream slowly recedes, giving way to the noise of the street, slightly muffled by the glass, and the warmth from the sun on her right cheek, and the weight of the hand resting cozily on her hip. V smiles before she awakens: this hand is always here, every morning, no matter if it's a good one or bad one. Fingers slide over metal knuckles before closing around his palm; V pulls Goro's hand up, presses it to herself, and begins to wait.
She almost always wakes up first. It’s not hard to set up, since she can control her sleeping schedule, and Goro’s ‘mechanisms’ work even better than hers. The power of self-discipline! V’s waiting for Goro to move and pull her closer, for his morning stubble scratching the skin behind her ear while he whispers ‘Good morning,’ for him, kissing her in the cheekbone, and in the shoulder, and everywhere again and again until she finally decide to ‘wake up’.
But time’s passing and nobody’s moving, and V starts getting bored. Not enough as to get up and make some coffee, but enough to frown, and to mutter in response to the long-awaited ‘Good morning’:
“Not yet, I’m still sleeping.”
V ignores both cheek and shoulder kisses. She diligently imitates even breathing, but every now and then she strays into indignant sniffling, and Goro stops:
“What is wrong?”
V tries to keep silent, so then Goro's hand is released from hers, gets under her t-shirt, and rests on the left side of her stomach. There is nothing but smooth realskin under his fingers, all her scars are in the past, but this does not change anything: V's shoulders cramp for a second, but they immediately relax when a hot wave rushes to her skin where Goro touches her — V’s body's got not the most pleasant way to signal “we are safe”.
“So what is wrong?” Goro asks again.
“I’m sleeping,” V insists.
“Your data says the opposite thing.”
"Hey!" V tries to punch Goro with her elbow, but she can’t swing it properly, and the poke turns out to be completely weak. “I didn't give you access so you could catch me in petty lies!”
Goro chuckles softly and shakes his head; V doesn't see it, but he can feel his beard slipping along her shoulder, brushing against her skin; the unsolicited pleasure is felt so strongly that V even shudders, but she’s not get confused so easily.
“I’m deadly serious! Turn it off right now!”
“Why?”
“This is.. this is…”
She tries to squeeze several thoughts into her words at once: that she gave him this access to use it as the last resort, and that this is a sign of trust, which Goro's abusing right now, and this is just…
“This is unfair! You have all my biometrics there and can read me like a book, in live air.”
“It has some advantages, does it not?”
These words burn on her skin, and Goro's voice is so insinuating that V catches her breath and feels heavy below her waist. Her imagination dives into free flight, and Goro, literally, reads her thoughts, nibbling the skin of her neck while his palm slowly slides up. V grabs his wrist:
“Turn it off,” she deminds. “I'm really uncomfortable, I'm like... like naked! So…”
“Since when do you feel uncomfortable being naked in front of me?”
V trails off and then laughs with her head thrown back so her cheek touches his.
“Okay, you got me here,” she finally admits. “But turn it off anyway, please. I really mean it.”
“V,” Goro briefly takes her earlobe with his lips. "I did not even turn it on."
“No lies?”
She turns around a little just to see his face, and Goro's eyes are so honest and so unbearably beautiful, so when he says: “No lies”, V, of course, immediately believes.
Maybe, too soon: Goro kisses her right in the moment V realizes she wants it. His hand is under her T-shirt, fingers drawing circles across her skin: first larger one, around her left breast, then smaller, around the nipple. His touches are light, barely perceptible, just the way she likes it at the beginning . V involuntarily bites Goro’s lip as he presses his finger on her nipple, still slightly, as if he knows for sure…
As if he knows exactly what she wants.
She exhales noisily and pulls away, but doesn't have time to say anything.
“V,” Goro smiles. “I do not need to see your data to read you.”
His voice is so full of promises, V gets goosebumps on her back and arms. She smiles and closes her eyes as Goro reaches out to kiss her again. V lifts her chin impatiently, opens her mouth... and feels his lips pressing against her forehead.
“Sleep well,” he whispers.
“What?” V grabs the hand that almost slipped out from under her T-shirt. “Where are you going?”
“I am not going to disturb you…”
He tries to get up, or maybe he just pretends, but V isn't going to find out. "Arasaka'' wired her body with hundreds of neuro links, accelerating her reflexes to unthinkable speed right in such a case: when you need to get up abruptly and pin one nasty bodyguard in retirement back to the bed. She is aroused and irritated, which 'nasty bodyguard' seems to be fully enjoying judging by his lips corners, slightly up.
“Goro,” V presses on his shoulders with all her weight. "Don't you dare do this to me!"
“Do what?”
“You know what!”
“I do not understand what you mean. Did I start forgetting English?..”
V may be looking down on Goro, but she has no advantage over him. And it doesn't matter that he's aroused too — V sits on him and feels it perfectly, god damn! — but his self-control is made of iron. She knows what he wants to hear, and another time she would say it eagerly, but today Goro took her by surprise, and the digital adrenaline in her system requires her to fight.
“Stop pretending,” V clenches her fingers on Goro's shoulders. “You know what I’m talking about.”
“I have no idea.”
“Oh really? And who just bragged that he can read me?”
The silver rings of his optics narrow slightly towards the pupils, then widen again; Goro grins, puts his hand on V's thigh, admitting he missed a punch. She allows herself to be distracted, just for a second, to focus on his fingers sliding under the fabric of her underwear mockingly, along the very edge. A second turns into two, then into three: these hands have incredible power over her.
"Let us say, I know,” Goro admits. “But it does not change anything. You will have to say it, V.”
“Why so?” V is indignant, but not really sincere: Goro's fingers press lightly against her skin, and all she can think about is one small movement needed for them to end up inside her. Alas, instead of doing so, Goro removes his hand and takes V's chin.
“Because I am asking you,” he says bluntly, and one little word resonates with V’s body stronger than any touches. “What do you want?”
“You,” she gives up. “I want you, but I’m so pissed you made me say it!”
“But it was not hard at all, was it?” Goro presses his thumb to V's lips, preventing her from answering. “We do not always get what we want…”
V's stomach is twisted into a tight lump and her heart is pounding like crazy; Goro's finger slides down, pulling her lower lip slightly, and V fights the urge to bite it and clench her teeth to force Goro to make any sound already.
“But you will get it,” he says, finally. “Take off your t-shirt. And breathe out.”
Air escapes from her chest with a short chuckle — V even didn't notice that she was holding her breath. The fabric slides over her skin from bottom to top, and Goro's gaze moves in the same way, and V shudders a little at the anticipation of his touch and exhales falteringly when it becomes real.
His hands on her body, his lips under hers. V smiles between short kisses, imagining how she will win back: her revenge will be long and a little painful, but sweet, perhaps for both of them. Alas, this cunning plan goes wrong from the very beginning: Goro intercepts her wrist just the second she touches his hip.
“Later,” he says. “Let us take care of you now.”
The knuckles of bent fingers rest against V between her legs, pleasantly pressing on her clit and on her vagina's entrance. It feels good but too lightly and V moves her hips — one time. then again and again, — rubbing herself against his hand, trying to catch the right rhythm. Wet fabric slips over her skin. Goro raises himself on his elbow, not interfering but not helping either, just watching. V bites her lip when she feels she found it…
Goro immediately removes his hand and only shakes his head in response to her indignant moan.
"You're so impatient," he says sternly. “Look at you, V. No self-control."
“Fuck, Goro!” She pushes his shoulders with zero visible effect. “Why?”
“I would do anything for you,” he touches her again, briefly. “All you had to do was to wait. Just a little patience, V. But you never do this, do you?”
She nods and swallows hard as his fingers slide down her inner thigh.
“No, you want to have everything at once,” Goro’s voice drops to almost a whisper. “As if you do not know it always ends with trouble.”
V feels like she just got a cold shower.
“Hey! It was a low move!”
“Not at all,” Goro gets closer to her. “But this will be.”
Goro kisses her as he pushes her panties aside. V tries her best not to show her impatience: she has already figured out it will only make things worse. But when he inserts two fingers into her, quite shallowly just on one phalanx, she cannot hold it and demands:
"More!"
All she gets in return is a bitten lip; Goro pulls back, looks into her eyes, and slowly shakes his head. He continues to tease her, inserting his fingers deeper, then completely withdrawing his hand to stroke her thigh or touch her clit as if by accident. V tenses her muscles, trying to increase the sensations, but this does not help at all, and very soon her demand transforms into a plea.
"Please, Goro," she breathes as his fingers slip out of her again to run along her labia and come back. “Please, just fuck me."
“Later,” he promises and grins at her heavy sigh. “You are so beautiful now, I want to watch you a little more."
V doesn’t buy this “a little”, today “a little” turns into “too long” every time, but she's getting a pleasant surprise. Goro's hand presses against her pubis, his fingers are inside again, but this time on the full length, and she can't help but moan.
The vibration feels in every cell of her body; V is turned on to the limit, she needs just a little for her knees and hands to stop holding her. And she allows herself to fall, to bury her face in Goro's chest, not paying attention to how the edge of his implant digs into her cheek, it doesn't matter anyway, since her consciousness is already beginning to drift away…
Goro withdraws his hand again, and V doesn't even have the strength to resent. All she can do is gasp for air as Goro brushes her hair away from her face with light touches.
“I am sorry,” he says. "I did not think about your comfort."
"I'm fine!" V exhales. "Everything's damn great, Goro. Please, just continue. Please!"
“Just a little more, patience, V. Not for long, I promise.”
She closes her eyes and nods meekly, for which she receives a kiss on the top of her head and a barely audible:
"Good girl."
V lets him turn her around and pull her down, lifts her hips a little as he pulls off her underwear, obeying his hands and his quiet, polite asks, until she's back on her side again, with the back pressed against Goro's chest, and his lips are touching her neck as he speaks, but instead of "Good morning", he whispers:
"Spread your legs."
She nods and obeys; Goro's fingers run along the inside of the thigh from the knee to the groin, then back causing V to shiver slightly, and repeat:
“Please, please, please…"
It seems that Goro doesn't hear her: he kisses her on the shoulder, then presses on her knee, forcing her to open even more. V even thinks in the first second that she imagined new sensations: a touch on the labia, and this light, careful pressure near the entrance, but almost immediately she hears:
"V? May I?.."
"Yes, yes!" V interrupts him and immediately stops, but this time her impatience is forgiven. She arches, pressing her shoulder blades into Goro's chest as he enters her and freezes, giving her time to feel and adjust. It feels so good, V smiles and rubs the back of her head against Goro, hoping that he will understand her without words, and his lips are pressed to her shoulder again, and his fingers grope for her clit.
“I want to feel you come.” Goro's whisper burns her skin. "Will you do it for me?"
V swallows hard and nods, but it's not enough.
“V?”
“Yes,” she exhales.
“Very good.”
V clings to the pillow as she needs to put her hands somewhere, and she doesn’t want to touch him or herself at the moment, she doesn’t want to be distracted from what Goro is doing with her body. The time for light touches is long gone, his fingers moving confidently and quickly, and V involuntarily tenses her muscles to increase sensation even more and hears his heavy, ragged breath behind her.
A small crack in the armor of his composure. The temptation is too great, and V is trying to break through it:
“Just fuck me! You want it, I can feel you, you know?"
“Later,” Goro whispers hoarsely. "Later..."
Now V's doing it on purpose, squeezing her muscles, trying to get tighter so that Goro can feel everything he does to her and her every reaction, but she's gone too far. Goro is right, she doesn't have much self-control, but that doesn't bother her at all right now. V gives up and lets the pleasure take over her. The sensation is so strong that she tries to close her legs, but Goro only presses his fingers harder against her clit, causing a new wave to roll through V's body like an aftershock.
Goro waits for V to get calm and freeze, then he looms over her and begins to move. Even now, there is no rush in his moves; V feels even, confident thrusts and opens her eyes. This calmness is a pure bluff, V easily reads it from half-open lips, from a tense crease on his forehead, from his blurred look. His face barely noticeable changes, but V doesn't miss it:
"Let it out," she asks. "Don't hold it, Goro."
V can never get enough of him, moaning, and of this image of all his damned discipline and self-control crumbling away, leaving nothing but a man as helpless for her as she is for him.
“You're such an asshole,” V says as Goro collapses onto the bed behind her, panting. "And a poser. You were on the edge yourself, but no, you needed to make a whole show!"
The name-calling doesn't make any impression on Goro, he only pulls her up to him and whispers in her ear:
"Guilty."
V knows for sure that he is smiling. She twists under his arm to take his face in her hands and rest her forehead against hers, and then his smile is reflected in hers.
“Good morning,” V whispers. "Good, good morning."