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Sunghoon and Sunoo broke up three years ago. After seven years of dating, and being each other’s first loves, they decided to go their separate ways. They ended things on a friendly note, and Sunoo moved abroad for a while.
They agreed on not seeing each other again as that would be the best and easiest way for them to move on.
And with all these things considered, Sunoo really has no idea how he ended up in this whole debacle.
He wakes up pressed to another warm body. That isn’t the first nor the last time that has ever happened. The thin bed sheets are sticking to his sweaty skin and the guy next to him snores softly. Sunoo stretches his sore muscles; there’s a dull pain in his backside, insinuating he’s had some fun the night prior. He doesn’t remember much, however, he remembers bits and pieces. The rest will come to him in a few hours. As it usually does after a night of drinking. It’s not like he was wasted, that’s just how his body works.
A phone rings. It’s loud and annoying and Sunoo groans, loud enough for the other guy to hear.
Finally, the last night’s lover stirs awake and grabs his still ringing phone.
“ Shit. Fuck!” He curses. Sunoo’s eyes shot open. He knows that voice. He’d recognize that voice everywhere. He doesn’t even want to turn around and face him. The missing puzzle pieces of last night flood Sunoo’s mind in a huge wave. He feels ashamed.
“Sunoo, shit, sorry, I have to leave,” Sunghoon gets up in a hurry. Sunoo doesn’t look at him. “I know you’re awake. We should probably talk. But not now, I’m getting married in a few hours.”
~*~
Sunoo and Sunghoon started dating the day after Sunghoon’s sixteenth birthday. They met through mutual friends and after a few months of being friends, Sunoo took the risk and kissed Sunghoon square on the mouth when he was congratulating him for his birthday. Then he ran away before Sunghoon even had the chance to react.
The following day Sunghoon came over to Sunoo’s house. The younger one seemed like he wanted to pretend nothing had happened but Sunghoon panicked and his whole prepared monologue was suddenly useless. He admitted to having feelings for Sunoo and asked him out. That day, they kissed again. And again.
Four years into their relationship, shortly after Sunoo graduated high school, they moved in together. To strangers, they were just roommates. Only the closest people knew of their relationship.
But Sunghoon didn’t mind. He didn’t care. To him, Sunoo was his future. He envisioned all their future adventures, maybe even getting married one day, if the country progresses.
Even though they were too busy with work and adult responsibilities, as long as Sunghoon could come home and find Sunoo, he knew he’d be fine.
However, one day he woke up and realized that they’re no longer the lovey dovey couple. The spark died down. They weren’t roommates just to strangers anymore.
It was a mutual decision to end things. Shortly thereafter, Sunoo moved to Japan. Few months after their break up, Sunghoon started regretting letting go of Sunoo.
Then he met Jihye. Jihye, who was sweet and kind and bubbly. Jihye who was just like Sunoo.
She was supposed to be a rebound, to entertain Sunghoon for a while. But he fell in love. Not necessarily with her, but with the similarities between her and Sunghoon’s first love.
He always made sure to treat her right and in return, she gave him her all. Sunghoon even took her first time. And even though he would never tell her, never hurt her like that, he never focused on her when they made love.
As time went on, Sunghoon learned to be happy with what he had. He moved in with Jihye, met her family, even adopted a dog. The only next logical step was proposing to her.
For a fleeting moment, he thought of proposing with the ring he had bought for Sunoo and never got to give him. But he couldn’t. The ring was Sunoo’s, still.
He bought a different one, just as pretty. Jihye said yes, as expected. She immediately started with planning the wedding and Sunghoon gave her the green light to plan it however she seems fit.
At that point in time, it had been two years since they broke up and Sunghoon still let himself think about what it would be like to propose to Sunoo instead.
Few weeks and countless wedding venue tours later, Jihye mentioned a destination wedding. Sunghoon suggested Hawaii and Jihye beamed.
Sunghoon’s childhood friend knew someone who could rent them a private beach. Everything went well, everyone was excited… except for Sunghoon himself. For him, this was just something he felt like he was supposed to do; get a job, find a girlfriend, marry her. But it wasn’t what he actually wanted.
Many times, he thought of contacting Sunoo, but he just couldn’t bring himself to do it.
Haebom, Sunghoon’s colleague and a friend, his best man actually, planned a whole bachelor party for him. They arrived in Hawaii a few days prior to the wedding, for some final checking. Then Haebom dragged Sunghoon and some other friends of his to a club, and tried to get him wasted. But Sunghoon is good at handling his liquor.
“Hey, isn’t that the guy you lived with after high school?” Haebom poked Sunghoon’s ribs. Blood ran cold in Sunghoon’s veins as he slowly turned around. And sure, there he was. He bleached his hair and got his ears pierced. He looked as beautiful as ever, just like Sunghoon remembered him to be.
“We should say hi!” Haebom exclaimed and without waiting for Sunghoon, he ran to Sunoo. And that’s how Sunghoon and Sunoo ended up face to face after three long years.
Sunoo smiled at Sunghoon, his face adorably flushed. “What are you doing here?” He asked. Sunghoon gestured towards Haebom and the others. “Bachelor party.” He didn’t say it was his party, he didn’t mention that he was in fact getting married the very next day. The moment his eyes met Sunoo’s, none of that mattered. “What are you doing here?”
“I work here. Not in this bar, but here in Hawaii,” Sunoo explained. Sunghoon just hummed in response. He felt nervous and awkward. “I missed you,” he suddenly blurted out and Sunoo laughed. “I know. Missed you too.”
In hindsight, he should’ve left when Haebom and the others did. But with Sunoo by his side, he wanted - needed - to stay a little longer.
Around two in the morning, they stumbled out of the club into the somewhat warm yet chilly night. Sunoo rubbed his arms. “Well, I should go.”
Something shifted in Sunghoon. “Let me go with you.” They were both drinking, so he needed to make sure Sunoo got to his place safely.
~*~
That’s how he finds him pressed against the front door of Sunoo’s apartment, the shorter man licking into his mouth eagerly. Sunghoon knows that he’s doing something horrible, but he can’t stop it. This is everything he’s ever wanted. Sunoo still sounds the way he remembers. Still feels the same way; incredible.
Sunghoon can’t help but kiss Sunoo everywhere he can reach. He bites at his skin, grazing his teeth wherever he feels like it. He wishes for the night to never end. This is what he needs, this feels right. Sunoo says his name like a prayer, clawing at his back with his short blunt nails. Sunghoon realizes that this is where he belongs. With Sunoo, in his bed, in him.
Nothing else matters at that moment.
~
He hates the man that’s staring back at him from the mirror.
“Sunghoon, honey?” His mom peeks in. “It’s time.”
~*~
Sunoo watches the sunset and furiously wipes his face that is all wet from tears.
He thought it was fate that they met again. Turns out it was just a cruel joke.
He hasn’t done anything the whole day, except texting his best friend that he can’t hang out. He calls but Sunoo doesn’t pick up. Can’t even speak properly.
As the sun completely disappears behind the horizon, Sunoo breaks out in a long, painful sob. The pain he feels is almost the same as the one he felt when they broke up.
Someone knocks on the door. Sunoo thinks about ignoring them, it’s probably Jungwon. He won’t get mad.
More knocking. With a loud groan, Sunoo gets out of the bed and drags himself to the front door. “Won-ah I told y-“ It’s not Jungwon.
“We have to talk,” Sunghoon says, pushing past Sunoo’s frozen figure.
“You should be at your fucking wedding-“
“I didn’t marry her,” he interrupts Sunoo. “I couldn’t.” They stare at each other for what feels like an eternity. They really have to talk but neither of them know what to say.
“I belong here,” Sunghoon says, finally. Sunoo cocks an eyebrow at him. “Hawaii?”
“With you. I can’t stay away.” His phone keeps buzzing with text messages and notifications as he kicks the front door closed and closes the distance between them.
