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Ciel had never understood why, exactly, but he'd always felt out of place. Out of time.
He'd read The Marvels, once, and had seen Joseph describe his uncle's house, and found himself wondering if someone could really get stuck like that. Because he'd always felt like he'd been taken out of one place in history, and dropped into another, not remembering anything. He felt like he'd been one of the audience when Time appeared and said that time had passed.
Or like Billy Pilgrim, from Slaughterhouse Five, who'd come unstuck in time, though much more linear and without the aliens and sex. The sentiment was there, being dropped into an unfamiliar time, no one believing him when he tried to explain. Especially since he didn't have any memories of it, they'd been locked away.
He'd found a connection with victorian fashion and architecture, finding himself drawn towards it. It felt like home in a way modern things didn't really, and he'd found himself within it. He'd gotten a good amount of clothes in that style by now, even just living in the little house he owned on his own. He'd gotten kicked out early, but at sixteen, he was doing pretty well for himself, having built up the money to buy the clothes in the first place. He still wanted a different, something big, once again victorian, changed as little as possible beyond electricity and wifi. He didn't know where he'd find something like that, but it had to exist.
Legally, despite being kicked out, he was still Ciel Phantomhive. All he had to do was wait, and he'd inherit whatever his parents had. They'd never told him anything.
Museums had become like a second home to him, and he loved to be in them. They made him feel almost at home, seeing the things that sat around him, even though he didn't know why. He still felt slightly out of place, seeing things on display against white walls and podiums instead of being used or worn, or hung on wooden walls. He'd never quite understood the feeling, like he remembered something he shouldn't, like he wasn't supposed to be here. Like he belonged wherever they did.
He had wandered through the new museum in his town a few times, but he'd never really paid attention. His brain wouldn't focus. But now, he was taking in every detail, standing at each and every display and studying it, reading what it was. He wanted to go to the painting section, but he left it for last, keeping himself occupied with everything else. Even though he felt the pull towards the area, he ignored it for now, knowing it would build the excitement when he finally did go.
He'd seen a man around here that could swear he'd seen before, tall with long black hair and black clothes. He felt familiar, walking around with the same curious, almost reverent expression, like he too felt almost at home here. Maybe he'd come unstuck in time as well, and he and Ciel were just a pair of wanderers, trying to find a home in this unfamiliar world. Maybe they'd known each other, back before they'd lost everything, and fell through the decades.
His own light blue hoodie felt awkward in this place, confronted with reminders of a life he should be living, just out of reach. It had a cutesy pair of black wings, and a tail, and horns on the hood. He didn't remember when he'd gotten it, but something about him owning it was almost funny. He wondered if the life he couldn't remember had anything to do with it.
As he finally allowed himself to enter the painting gallery, he glanced around at the art, smiling. There wasn't much that sparked anything, though, and he felt drawn towards a painting in the middle. There weren't many people around it, and so he stepped in front of it, and looked up…
Only to find himself staring back. Blinking, he registered that the boy in the picture looked exactly like him, down to the eye patch that covered his weird eye. There was a man next to him, with black hair and brown eyes that almost seemed red, both dressed in victorian clothing. Quickly, he checked the plaque in front of the painting.
Earl Phantomhive and his butler.
Phantomhive…
Just like him. He looked away, and found the man in black standing next to him. Just as he looked up to see his face, the man turned to look at him. Black hair, brown eyes that almost appeared red, dressed in all black.
It was him, the face in the painting, the man in black.
They met eyes, and his world went black.
Sebastian had always felt out of place.
Perhaps it was the consequence of growing up neurodivergent, or the othering that came with being a quiet child. Either way, he'd never felt like he fit into what was supposed to be his place in the world.
Sometimes, he didn't feel human. Sometimes, he felt like he'd fallen through time.
Either way, it came and went, though it was always there at some level. Sometimes he'd look in the mirror expecting to see a thing with horns and claws and wings. Sometimes he would look around and think of how odd it was for there to be so many electronics around, didn't they not exist yet?
And yet, some days, it barely bothered him at all.
It was a very confusing experience.
He found comfort in old buildings, victorian-era architecture, and honestly, a lot of things from victorian england. It felt familiar in ways he couldn't explain, like a liminal space, or a dream. He didn't understand it, but maybe he didn't want to, he liked a little mystery in his life. Maybe he was the reincarnation of some famous person. Hah.
He pushed open the door to the museum, his art bag hanging from his shoulder. Maybe if something struck his brain with inspiration, he could draw while here. It shouldn't be too odd a sight, right? A museum was a place for art, after all. At least, in part.
He sighed. He didn't like being in public like this, too many people, too many eyes. But he loved museums. So he'd tough it out, look at the art, and leave when it got to be too much.
Today was already a bad day. His body felt wrong, restrictive, like parts of it were missing. Teeth, claws, horns, tail, wings. The mark on the back of his hand, the one he'd drawn over and over so many times.
The people at his old school had thought he was part of a cult or something. He supposed he understood that, the symbol was a pentagram, after all. Still, it was rather annoying being so shunned. And yet he didn't entirely mind being alone, just the reason why.
He pulled his headphones over his ears and put on a playlist that was good for drowning out all the unpleasant sensory stuff. Glancing around, he caught sight of a boy many years younger than him, yet who looked inexplicably familiar. He wore a blue hoodie with cutesy demon features, like horns and wings, and a tail. Something about it struck him as ironic.
He was also wearing an eyepatch. Sebastian wondered why.
He continued through the various exhibits, admiring the different pieces and sketching a few when he could. It was hard to do so when people were constantly watching him, but he managed, and the feeling of pencil on paper took his mind off it. There was a reason he liked to draw so much.
The art gallery was calling to him. He didn't know why, but somewhere along the way, he'd started feeling a pull. He'd gone around the rest of the building first, occasionally catching sight of the boy in the demon hoodie. Such a strange thing, to notice the stranger who seemed familiar. Usually, he didn't realize he knew people.
And why was 'heaven' the first word that came to mind when he thought of him?
Eventually, he'd left the second to last exhibit there, and began to walk to the art gallery. The room was big and segmented, but one of the paintings in the middle was calling to him. He stepped up to look at it and found the rest of the world fading away.
One of the figures looked like him. So alike him, in fact, that for a second he thought he was seeing things. Same black hair and dark eyes, same facial structure - they could be twins. He was dressed in a victorian era suit, and was holding a boy who looked like the boy he'd seen in the museum earlier. Sebastian looked closer at the small plaque that said what the painting was, finding its title staring back at him.
A butler. Why did he look so much like him? Sebastian was sure that, if he weren't wearing gloves, the back of his hand would have that symbol Sebastian had been drawing since forever. He didn't know what that meant. He meant something, Sebastian was sure of that.
He looked away, only to find the boy who reminded him of heaven standing close by, almost right next to him. The boy looked over too, and they met eyes - and Sebastian's head exploded in pain, vision blacking out.
When he came to, Ciel was sitting on the floor of the museum, the area around him empty. He heard a groan from nearby and looked over, seeing the man in black was lying there, rubbing his head.
Sebastian.
The name seemed so obvious now. Sebastian Michaelis. His butler.
He sighed and rubbed his forehead as well, waiting as his memories found their places. It was so odd to experience, gaining new memories like this. Sebastian must be experiencing something similar.
He moved closer to his demon, watching as his eyes fluttered open. Sebastian had always been a very beautiful man. He reached out, tracing over his face slightly, and Sebastian leaned into it, like second nature. Those red eyes focused on him and he smiled, running his thumb over the demon's cheek, such an intimate gesture.
If only people knew.
Sebastian just let him do as he wished, pliant under Ciel's touch - though he moved away slightly when Ciel attempted to remove his headphones. So Ciel left them alone, instead examining his demon's new form, paying it special attention. He was, after all, more beautiful than any of the artwork here. Demons were often mistaken as angels due to their beauty, after all.
Speaking of which, where was everybody? The room was empty and the place was suspiciously quiet. Ciel wondered if they had simply left them there and closed the place. It sure seemed like it.
He sat back and Sebastian finally sat up, stretching in a very human manner. Ciel enjoyed seeing this imperfect, more human side of Sebastian. He was beautiful, he always was, but there was just something about seeing his hair all ruffled and his clothes full of wrinkles that made things feel more real. Sebastian had always seemed like a perfect, unattainable dream to him, but this made it feel real. Gone was the perfect facade, and in its place, a demon with all the imperfections of a human.
Oh, he loved Sebastian.
The demon gave him a soft smile, and Ciel noticed the way he sat - different than before. His shoulders slightly bent, no longer proud and perfect, more… hesitant, almost. He was fidgeting. That was new. Ciel payed attention to the way he tapped his fingers in a pattern against each other, or twisted the smooth plastic rings that adorned his fingers.
They must have been made to do that without pain. He remembered a set of them being advertised in a store near his home. Fidget rings.
Somehow, the idea of Sebastian as the "odd one out" was fitting. Gone was the perfectly confident, unshakable demon. He may still be a demon, now, but he'd changed. He was almost nervous, it seemed.
Ciel set a hand on one of Sebastian's arms. The fidgeting didn't stop, but it seemed to calm Sebastian in some way. Ciel didn't even know how he could tell. Perhaps he had just been around Sebastian enough.
"Did they really just leave us here?" Sebastian blurted out, voice rather loud in the silence of the building.
"Well, there's not anymore else around, so I guess."
"Why?"
Ciel gave him a confused look. Sebastian paused for a moment before attempting to explain, stumbling over his words.
"It's just, well, I mean, they wouldn't have- why would they- ugh!"
He titled his head back, making a noise of frustration, and Ciel smiled. A stutter?
How cute.
He reached up to toy with the bit of Sebastian's hair he could reach, that wasn't blocked by those headphones. Once again, Sebastian leaned into the touch without thinking, and Ciel found himself enjoying having Sebastian so pliant, under his control. Such a perfect demon, and all his to enjoy. Really, how could he have gotten luckier than this?
Sebastian gave him a smile, and reached out to take his hand, before swiftly gathering him up in his arms. Ciel held on as Sebastian stood, rather used to Sebastian's habit of carrying him. He'd missed being held like this.
Sebastian carefully approached the open doorway to the room, stepping through with his eyes closed.
Nothing happened.
Huh. It seemed like this place didn't have much in the way of security. He continued unobstructed to the glass doors that led outside, cursing under his breath when he saw the dark sky.
Ciel looked up at him, confused.
"What's wrong?"
"It's late… I live with a few people, but there's sorta a curfew - there's no way I'll get back in tonight…"
Ciel frowned and reached up to loop his arms around Sebastian's neck, wondering what had stuck him in such a situation.
"You can stay with me tonight," he said, "I have a house, you know, my parents in this life don't really like me. So you can stay with me."
Sebastian looked down at him, seeming slightly surprised.
"Are you sure?"
"Of course. I miss having you by my side. You can stay as long as you'd like, forever, if you want."
Sebastian thought he'd much rather stay with Ciel, forever, but he didn't want to say so immediately - it felt like too much of an invasion of Ciel's space. No matter how close they had been, it had been years, things had changed, he thought. He still felt the same, but with distance and time, he didn't know if Ciel would, and resisted doing anything.
His time in this world had rendered him much more human, if not in body any longer, in mind. It was odd to live the life of a human so casually, no longer completely focused on a single role, just being who he was. He couldn't deny that he liked it, though he hadn't disliked his time as Ciel's butler, either. Though even that role had been more human than his previous ones. The longer he was connected to Ciel, it seemed, the more human he became.
Ciel, however, seemed to have none of those reservations.
"C'mon, Sebastian. Stay with me. It doesn't seem like you like it much at your current place, anyway."
"... True, I don't. Alright. I'll stay."
Ciel smiled and leaned up to press a kiss to Sebastian's cheek, delighting in the soft blush that colored his demon's cheeks. They stepped through the doorway, out into the brisk night air, and Ciel stared up at the stars as they left. They were beautiful, ge thought. He liked the stars.
Sirius, the dog star, was visible. The one he'd been named after in his old life. That meant it was closer to morning than he thought. Ah, well. Tomorrow was Saturday, he didn't have anything he needed to do. He and Sebastian could sleep in as long as they wanted, maybe they could watch something together, curled up in bed.
He liked that idea.