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The drinking had been heavy that night. Mercifully, Peridot hadn't had that much to drink, and Jasper had offered to pay for it all, so the small woman had little interaction with the alcohol.
That didn't stop Jasper from being intoxicated. Lapis was far less drunk, but she was tired and was slowly muttering about her plans to simply fall on the couch and sleep. Jasper was instead trying to communicate to Peridot through the haze of alcohol, with her trying to ignore her as she opened the door and let the other two stumble in.
True to her word, Lapis made a direct line to the couch and faceplanted upon it, snoring softly afterwards. Jasper staggered in and leaned on the nearest flat surface. Said flat surface happened to be the same shelving unit she had broken in the same way not a month ago, held together by duct tape and hope. Predictably, it bent and eventually snapped, prompting Jasper to swear, Peridot to complain, and Lapis to moan through the cushions for them to shut up.
Peridot, mentally making a note to fix it later, walked past the huge brute of a living alcohol furnace and towards her own room, leaning on the wall to support herself.
Off-tempo, heavy footfalls made her realise she wouldn't be alone on her path. When she reached the door, Jasper put a hand on her shoulder.
"Wait, Peri, I got somethin' to tell ya."
Peridot groaned and turned around just enough to look at Jasper. "What?"
Jasper blinked, then blinked again, then shook her head and squinted in focus. "Look, Peri, I... I think we really had fun tonight and I just wanna... uh..."
"Save it for tomorrow, please Jasper," Peridot sighed. "I'd like to retire for the night."
"No, wait, I just wanna...!" Jasper shouted, then looking over to the couch - the small islander woman hidden from their sight - before she continued. "I'm not done."
"Please, Jasper, just-"
"Look, I just wanted to say I think you're... really cool and-"
"Thank you, now let me go."
"-...I think you're awesome and amazing and I-"
"Jasper, you're drunk, go get some sleep-"
"Dammit, Peri, I'm trying to tell you something important!" Jasper hiccuped.
Peridot rolled her eyes. "I'm sure you'll be able to remember by tomorrow."
"I..." Jasper paused, then sighed, moving her hand off Peridot's shoulder. "Yeah, you're right."
Peridot gave the big girl a little smile and a pat on the arm, before turning to open the door and step into the room. Before closing it, she turned to Jasper and said "Good night."
Jasper gulped, then stepped into the doorway, grabbing Peridot by the shoulders, turning her to face her. Peridot yelped, and was about to question what the big girl was doing before something blocked her mouth. White hair and tanned skin filled her vision, something wet was moving over her lips and-
She pushed herself away, mouth agape as she just stared at Jasper. Jasper blinked and looked at her. "What?"
"You kissed me!"
"I..." Jasper pulled herself back up to her full height.
"You fucking kissed me! Do you have any idea- I didn't ask for it- you're drunk-" Peridot stammered, before growling and glaring at Jasper. "Why the hell did you kiss me?!"
"I dunno, it just felt like a good time to-"
Peridot stepped forward and pushed Jasper, staggering her out of the room and into the hallway wall. "The right time?! Jasper, you muscle-brained clod, you should know that I'm not interested!"
"But-" Jasper held out a hand, but had it swatted away by Peridot's - and not the fleshy one either.
"Jasper, just... fuck off." Peridot glared down at her. "I'm not interested."
Peridot slammed her door shut, leaving Jasper to sit there, entirely silent for a while. Jasper brought herself to her feet.
"Fine! See if I care! Not like if I give a shit about you or your fragile little ego!" She stormed off down the hall to her own room and slammed the door too. She definitely wasn't crying.
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Jasper had decided, when she woke up, she would go for a run. It was cold, cloudy, and misty. Perfect weather to get your blood pumping and your mind sharpened. Sure, it wouldn't help the hangover, but she wasn't going to skimp out on routine over a simple headache.
On her way back, she stopped at the main bridge and leaned against the railings, looking out at the river and the ocean it connected to. Her head and heart were pounding, and all she wanted to do now was curl up back in bed and sleep in the warmth of her blankets.
She didn't want to, though. She didn't want to talk to anyone. Lapis would be annoyed at her for making so much noise while she was trying to sleep, and Peridot-
Definitely no talking to Peridot.
For who knows how long, she leaned on the bridge, letting her phone cycle through the remainder of her exercise playlist before repeating again, alone except for her thoughts and the cold winds. She remembered having an argument with Peridot, and a pretty significant one too if she had woken up with sore eyes, a clogged nose and a damp patch on her pillow that wasn't at mouth level.
It was in moments when she wasn't surrounded by others that she dropped her facade. Sure, she was tough and didn't take shit from anybody, but sometimes keeping herself always like that was exhausting. She hated to admit it, but she cared too much. About herself. About her friend's. About her reputation and her health. Her integrity, her sanity, hell, everything.
She cared when people insulted her or her friends. She would often get angry, but when she was alone, and she was sure she would be alone, it wasn't uncommon for her to just lie down and think. Sometimes she would get furious and break something she didn't care about. Sometimes she rushed to her exercise equipment and got her body working. Sometimes, she just cried and woke up a few hours later with a headache and a sore throat.
Her phone buzzed and an obnoxious hip hop song played through her headphones, and she instantly knew who was calling. She pulled her headphones down, unplugged them from the phone and answered the call.
"Hey Amy," she said with a small smile.
"Yo Jas," Amethyst replied, though after a small pause, continued: "You okay, dude?"
Jasper knew better than to lie to her cousin. "Just been thinking by the bridge again. Got into an argument with the green nerd when I was drunk."
"What was it about?" inquired the voice at the other end.
"I can't remember. But it was bad, if the fact I had cried was enough to show it."
"Damn, sorry to hear that. Wanna go get some snacks later and talk about it?"
"In a bit, yeah. Kinda want to be alone at the moment, you know how it is." Jasper sighed. "Give me a few hours?"
"Sure, no prob. I need to get some sleep anyway."
Jasper chuckled. "Stayed up all night banging your girlfriend again?"
"Fuck you," laughed the girl on the other end. "See you in a few hours, dude, take care, aight?"
"Sure, see ya."
---------------------------------------------------
If one thing could make Jasper cheer up, it was a nice burger. Sure, going with one that was loaded with bacon and barbecue sauce wasn't the healthiest option, but it made a great cheer-up food. Doubly so since Amethyst was paying.
"Thanks, cuz," Jasper said through a mouthful of burger. Amethyst laughed and took a sip from her drink.
"No prob. You sounded pretty upset."
"I just wish I could remember what I was upset about," Jasper muttered. "Must've been something personal if I ended up crying."
"Probably," Amethyst commented. "What were you thinking 'bout before you got smashed?"
"Something stupid, I'm sure. Like how Peridot should get out more."
"Maybe that's what you were arguing about?" Amethyst shrugged, snatching a fry from Jasper. Jasper retaliated by taking a sip of her cousin's drink.
"Nah, don't think so."
"Well, what do you remember?"
Jasper leaned back and hummed in thought. "I remember breaking the shelf again, then stopping by her door to talk for a bit. She didn't want to talk and then we argued. Something else happened and I fell on my ass while she slammed the door on me, but not before yelling at me. Then I got up and yelled at her, then went to sleep."
"Huh" was all Amethyst could say as she slurped her drink loudly.
Jasper groaned, tossing the rest of her burger in her mouth. "I should just avoid her for a while until she settles down."
"Thaaaat's gonna be a bit hard, dude, since she's coming this way."
"What?!" Jasper looked up at Amethyst, then at where she was looking. Peridot and Pearl were walking together, likely talking about something Jasper wouldn't be able to comprehend. She immediately turned back to her cousin, eyes wide.
"Shit, what the fuck do I do now...?"
"Gimme your fries and drink," Amethyst suggested. Jasper only raised an eyebrow in response, and the shorter girl just laughed with a 'worth it' somewhere among it.
"Amethyst!" Pearl shouted from somewhere far too close for Jasper's current comfort. "Can I talk to you for a second?"
"Oops, sorry Jas, gotta go. We'll talk later, yeah?" Before Jasper could yell at her to stay, she was gone. Jasper growled and downed the rest off her drink, then grabbed her fries and started walking off.
Unfortunately, Peridot was right in her path and she just about knocked the girl over in her hurry to leave.
Peridot looked... tired. More tired that usual. Was it the hangover, or something else?
"Oh, hey Peridot."
Peridot glanced up at the taller woman, then yawned. "Good morning, Jasper." Then she slipped past her and to the cafe's counter, ordering herself a coffee and standing. Jasper stood in place for a while, thinking faster than her mind really wanted to, before she decided to give up and walk back home.
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"Just talk to her."
Jasper sighed, resting her head on Lapis' lap as she sat on the couch. There was some sort of documentary going on, one Lapis had seen plenty enough, so she wasn't missing anything.
"I can't."
"You have a mouth and working vocal cords, don't you?"
"Very funny, Lapis."
"Seriously, talk to her. It might be awkward, but it's better to let it out now before you get drunk again."
Jasper sighed, glancing up at Lapis. She couldn't be bothered telling the little brat to stop playing with her hair. "You're probably right."
"Besides, you're strong. It's not like asking her a question is the toughest thing you've done."
The door opened, and Jasper looked up. The small asian woman she was trying so hard to avoid walked in, had a quick glance at the two on the couch, then walked off down the hall and, from the sounds of it, into her room.
"She's probably going to play something," Jasper said. "Guess I can't talk to her now."
Lapis just sighed and sat up, pulling Jasper up and off the couch - how was someone so tiny so damn strong? "Stop putting it off, you idiot, or I'll drag you two out and make you two talk it out."
Jasper angrily agreed, pushing Lapis' hands away gently, before walking to the door to Peridot's room. She waited a few seconds, before she knocked on it.
"Who is it?"
"Me."
"Good thing your voice is distinctive. Come in."
Jasper opened the door, and upon seeing what lay beyond it, almost closed it again. She wasn't expecting Peridot to be all but naked, her prosthetic arm resting on the bed as she held a screwdriver in her mouth.
"Bad time?"
"Sort of," Peridot muttered, then spat the screwdriver out and leaned back. "What do you want?"
"I..." Jasper started, then sighed, closing the door behind her and shrugging off her jacket. "Can we talk for a bit?"
"Can it wait?" Peridot replied dryly.
Jasper shrugged. "I guess, but I'd like to get it out of the way."
Peridot glanced up, then blinked, eyes widening slightly. Grunting, she put her prosthetic aside and patted a spot for Jasper to sit, to which the bigger woman did. "You look like you haven't slept well."
"Nothing I can't handle," Jasper said, smirking. Then she looked away, then down, then back at Peridot. "Did I... do anything last night?"
"You kissed me without any warning," Peridot replied almost instantly.
"Oh" was all Jasper could say. That... explains what the argument was about. Why had she done it, though? "Sorry."
"You were drunk, it wasn't really you."
Or maybe, she really wanted to. She had to admit, Peridot was adorable. A different kind of adorable to other girls she had been with, but adorable nonetheless. She was also really smart, and a total dork, and Jasper had found those two things really endearing.
"Jasper?"
Oh right, Peridot was sitting next to her. "Huh? Oh, sorry, zoned out a bit."
"Are you feeling alright?" Peridot asked quietly. "You're not as... brazen and obnoxious as usual."
"Hangover."
"Bullshit." Peridot put her hand on Jasper's shoulder. "I've seen you hungover. Something's bothering you."
"It's nothing," Jasper growled, though with hardly any energy behind it.
"Again, bullshit," Peridot snapped back. "What's wrong?"
"I don't fuckin' know!" Jasper shouted, turning to Peridot. "I'm just angry and sad at the same time, and I don't want to talk to you cuz I feel like you hate me and it's pissing me off and I don't know why and it's making it worse!"
Peridot's eyes widened, silence following for a pregnant pause except for Jasper's heavy breathing. Peridot sighed and turned away from Jasper, and Jasper's breath hitched for a second.
"Wait, shit, sorry, I didn't mean to snap at you, I just..." She growled, slapping her face with a hand. "God, I'm such an idiot."
"You are."
What? Jasper turned to the girl beside her. Peridot's expression was unreadable, something like a mixture of hurt and sympathy, but she was looking right at Jasper. And she couldn't look away.
"You are a clod. But you mean well, and you're not really that stupid." Peridot chuckled. "You can be an idiot and smart at the same time."
"How?"
"I'll just bore you with the explanation." Peridot smiled, patting Jasper on the shoulder. "I'm sorry about snapping at you last night. I was just tired and a little drunk and really wanted to play some Dark Souls without having someone slobbering all over my face."
"Sor-"
"You've already apologised, it's my turn," Peridot said before Jasper could so much as finish. "So yeah, sorry."
"Apology accepted, nerd," Jasper said with a smirk.
"...and when I said I wasn't interested, I meant I wasn't interested in being intimate with you at that point."
Jasper blinked, then grinned. "Does that mean-?"
"No!" Peridot shouted with a frown. "I mean... I'm not that interested. Besides, aren't you and Lapis dating?"
"We're just fuckbuddies. We tried the dating thing, but it broke apart quickly. We're better as friends anyway."
"Oh. Right, that makes sense I suppose."
Jasper chuckled, patting Peridot on the back, causing the girl to lurch forward. "If you ever change your mind or something, lemme know."
"Thank you for the offer," Peridot said, coughing a little, "but I think I'll be fine for a while."
"Suit yourself."
A moment of silence passed again, before Peridot picked her arm back up and opened it up with the screwdriver, doing some sort of fancy technical work inside of it that Jasper had no hope of understanding.
"Soooo... can I kiss you now?"
"No."
"It was worth a shot."