Archive of Our Own

The sun was hot on Monty’s back, but he was too lazy to move a muscle. It was the last day of summer, the worst day of the holiday. Tomorrow they would return to studying for the last year of high school.

Harper sighed deeply somewhere above him. They were lying by her pool, soaking in the last moments of heat and no worries. He could hear Harper change positions and the water splash slightly before cool drops hit his skin.

“H?”

“Just in the water”, she said. Her now cool and wet fingers wrapped around his wrist, making him startle.

Monty moved carefully onto his back and rested his arm over his eyes. “Is it this hot just so that we’d feel as lazy as possible? The universe is plotting against us.”

“I think it’ll be nice to go back. Finally have something to do.”

“We do stuff all the time.”

Harper snorted. “Like what?”

“Like… lying by the pool and talking shit”, he reached his hand out into the water and splashed in the direction of her voice.

“Missed me.”

“Keep telling yourself that.”

“Seriously. Nothing ever happens in the summer. It’s supposed to be the best time.”

“We must be such losers that nothing cool happens to us”, Monty teased.

Harper nudged his shoulder. “Well do you disagree? I’m sure all kinds of cool stuff happens to… Octavia Blake.”

Monty groaned. “Not again, please. What does she have that you don’t?”

“A thousand boyfriends, nice hair, boobs –”

“Well I can’t really back you up on those last two, can I?”

Harper ignored him. “Everyone loves her. Can she really be that great? I bet you’d think she’s hot if you saw her.”

“Good thing that I don’t then, huh?” Monty splashed her again, now faster. The momentary silence told him he’d succeeded.

“If you say you never think about dating, I won’t believe you.”

“How could I? You never stop gossiping!” Monty grinned at the huff she let out. “Of course I do. I want my first kiss to be awesome.”

“We’ve kissed like a hundred times”, Harper’s voice got weird, but Monty couldn’t quite place it.

“Yeah, but we were like seven and playing house. It doesn’t count. I want a real first kiss.”

“Right.”

“You know what I mean. I want to find someone special that I really like. I’ve never met anyone that’s made me feel like that.”

There was a sharp intake of breath.

“H?”

“What?”

“Were you listening?”

“No”, she answered after a beat. Monty could tell she was smiling. “I figured it was more interesting underwater.”

“Dick”, Monty muttered before sitting up and sliding into the water.

Harper was already retreating, giggling loudly as he tried to catch her.

He’d always loved Harper’s pool. His mom never let him swim at the public pool, but here he could be in the water freely. Monty wasn’t sure what his mom thought would happen to him at the public pool. He was blind, not five years old. He knew how to swim on his own.

—

“Keys”, Harper said.

He reached down into his pocket and held them out. Metal hit metal as Harper fit the key into the lock and opened the gate for him.

“Here.” The keys were pressed back into his palm firmly.

“Are you sure you don’t want to come in?”

“Have to get ready for tomorrow. I’ll see you in the morning, okay?”

“Okay”, he said, jumping just slightly at the feeling of Harper’s hand on his shoulder. “Bye.”

“Bye!”

Monty stepped through the gate and pushed it shut behind him, stopping to hear the click of it locking again. It took twelve steps to the stairs and five up them. As soon as he’d closed the door, he could hear his mother’s footsteps.

“Hey! How was your day?” she asked.

“It was okay. Wish it wasn’t the last one, though.”

She laughed. “What? You’re not excited to go back to school? Strange.”

“Very funny.”

“Are you hungry? Do you want me to make you something?”

“I’m fine”, Monty sighed. “Stop fussing. I live here too, you know.”

“Of course, of course.”

He headed towards his room, one hand trailing the surfaces of his route like always. The drawer in the hall, the smooth paint of the walls, the top of the armchair in the living room.

“Hey, son! How was Harper?” his dad’s voice came from behind him.

“She’s fine.”

“You two dating yet?”

“Very funny, dad.”

“It’s a dad’s job to embarrass their kids every now and then”, he chuckled.

“Keep up the good work.”

He’d almost reached his the door of his room when he heard his mom say: “How did we manage to raise such a sarcastic kid?”

“I can hear you!”

“It’s the truth, son!” his dad yelled back.

Monty slammed his door shut, listening to them laugh for a moment before shucking off his backpack. He still needed to take a shower to wash off the chlorine before starting to mentally prepare for the next day.

He didn’t mind school. It was more the people there that he didn’t enjoy. There were a lot of nice kids - mostly girls. He didn’t get along with the other boys that well. And all in all only Harper really stood up for him. She was a lot more confrontational than he was.

He just wanted to make it through the year in peace.

—

The school provided him with a typewriter, a heavy and noisy machine, that allowed him to write his notes in Braille. Monty appreciated having it, but christ was it loud. Every press of a button made a click and after each line there was a high ding.

“Order up!” he heard said.

The class erupted in laughter. Monty wondered how many times that would be funny. Last year it was six. The year before it was an elevator joke.

“Shut up, Finn!” Harper snapped from his right. She always sat slightly closer to him so she could whisper the notes from the board for him to write.

“I didn’t do anything!”

Finn was Monty’s least favorite person in the school. Harper always described him as “could be cute if he wasn’t such an asshole”.

“Settle down, kids!” their teacher, miss Griffin, called. “Summer’s over. Time to focus again.”

“She started it!”

“And I’m not afraid to finish –”

“Where do you think you are? This is school, not fight club. Finn, I’m warning you.”

“Sorry, miss. But it’s not my fault guide dog over there doesn’t have a sense of humor.”

“You’d better go see if the principal does. And apologize to Harper.”

Finn’s chair creaked against the floor when he got up. “Sorry.” He walked towards the door, but before he should’ve reached it, it opened already.

A new voice Monty had never heard before cleared their throat. “Hi, I was told to come to this class. I’m new here.”

“What’s your name?” miss Griffin asked, her papers fluttering.

“Nathan Miller.”

“Come on in, Nathan. There’s a free seat over there.”

Monty knew the only free seat was behind him. He could feel the new boy move past him and sit down. They hadn’t gotten any new people in a while. He wondered how long it’d take for the new boy to start hating the sound of his typewriter, too.

—

The next day they were sitting in the courtyard during their break, Monty’s legs over Harper’s lap as he lied on the cool stone bench. He could tell she was deep in thought because she hadn’t said much yet.

“The new guy is really cute”, she let out finally.

“Is that so?”

“Yeah, like… really cute. I wonder if he’d be my Prince Charming.”

Monty snorted, kicking her thigh with his heel. “What does he look like?”

“Short hair, dark skin, looks great in a t-shirt, dark eyes –”

“How does one look especially good in a t-shirt? We’re all wearing one.”

“Yeah, but he’s rocking it.”

“I don’t get it.”

Harper sighed. “He has muscles, Mon. He’s hot.”

“Alright, alright. I believe you –”

“Oh, there she is.”

“Who?”

“Octavia. She’s talking to him…”

“Well, it’s good that someone is.”

“I can’t believe it. She didn’t even give me a chance.”

“Nothing’s stopping you from talking to him”, Monty noted.

“What can I say after her that’ll make a difference?”

“You’re overreacting again, H.”

“I’m not.”

She was. Harper’s strange obsession to beat Octavia in “her own game”, as she put it, had continued for almost two years. Monty didn’t know the girl that well, just that she was unnaturally peppy and liked a lot of boys. He assumed it was a girl thing for the lack of better ideas, and Harper never gave him a clear answer.

Monty wasn’t sure why she was so concerned about other people’s relationships. He knew her and how great she was; there was no doubt someone would fall for her madly sooner or later. Sometimes he wondered if he was the reason she wasn’t dating. Harper helped him out every single day. Maybe he was holding her back.

She’d once told him that if he didn’t become more concerned with meeting someone, he’d go through life without kissing anyone. It was just her teasing him, but sometimes the words haunted his mind at night. He wasn’t even sure what it felt like to fall for someone. And what if that someone didn’t return his feelings.

It all just felt like a lot of trouble.

—

He was completely focused on writing when someone tapped his shoulder gently, startling him.

“Hey, do you have an eraser I could borrow?”

It was the new boy, Nathan. Monty liked his voice even though he wasn’t used to it yet.

“Sorry, but I don’t really use one.”

“Oh. Oh, sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it.” He smiled a little at the mortified tone of the boy’s voice. “Oh wait”, Monty reached over to his right, finding Harper’s desk. Harper’s hand turned his around before placing her eraser on his palm. He then held it out for Nathan to take.

“Thanks”, the boy whispered.

After class they started talking to the boy right away. Harper had seemed to find her confidence again. She was talking a mile a minute, Nathan getting a few words in every now and then. Monty listened, mostly.

It turned out Nathan lived in the same direction as them, just a little further away. Harper asked him to walk home with them.

She kept talking for the whole way, stopping only to warn Monty about steps and curbs as they went. He just held on to her bicep like always. Before they reached Monty’s house, she’d gotten Nathan’s old hometown, his current address and favorite food out of him.

“Keys”, Harper said as they stopped by his gate. He handed them over, and she unlocked it for him. “Bye then, Monty, Nathan.”

“You’re not coming this way?” Nathan asked.

“Bye”, Monty said and got inside, leaving Harper to explain she lived two blocks down. She just always brought him home after school and then walked back. Maybe Nathan would be impressed by her selflessness, and they’d fall madly in love. Who knew.

He called his mom on his way to his room and assured her he was home and safe and wouldn’t starve to death in the few hours he’d be alone. It had originally been a battle just to get them to agree to let him stay home alone. Monty wasn’t sure how they thought he’d be able to live on his own one day, or if they thought he never would.

As he got in the shower, he was still thinking about it. He was nearly 18 years old, but his only privacy was a few hours alone a day at home. It shouldn’t be like that. He should’ve been preparing for a life on his own.

As a kid he always imagined moving together with Harper, and having her help him around like she always did. But Harper would get married and maybe have kids. She wouldn’t be there to help him constantly. And of course Monty would go through his life without being kissed by anyone and he’d die alone and –

He turned off the shower and leaned his forehead against the cool glass wall. Now who was overreacting.

—

“I can’t believe you dragged me into this”, Harper sighed for the third time. “You know they talk to us about universities at school, right?”

“I know, but I want to be prepared. And they only go through the most generic stuff. I need to know all my options”, Monty said. He stopped to listen as he heard someone approaching them, but the footsteps continued past him.

“How did you even find this agency? We have a guidance counselor at school, you know.”

“Yes, one. Who has to help all the seniors. Trust me. This is a good idea.”

“But I’m the one that has to talk”, Harper patted his arm to signal that someone was coming.

“Good afternoon! I’m Callie Cartwig”, said a cheery voice. “How can I help you?”

“I’m Harper and this is Monty. We wanted to talk about, uh, universities.”

“Great! Follow me.”

Harper guided him across the carpet-padded floor and then into a chair. Monty found the edge of the desk with his hands before sitting down.

“So, what did you have in mind? Usually the kids that come here have a specific school they want into and want to know more about the entrance exams and so on.”

Monty cleared his throat. “I, uh, don’t have a specific idea. I just wanted to know more about my options since I’m blind.”

“Ah, alright”, her fingers started tapping on the keyboard of her computer. “Do you have any ideas on what you want to study? Do you want to stay near home?”

Monty twisted his hands in his lap. “I want to be a teacher. But not like for really small kids. More like high school or university students.”

“Okay”, Callie chuckled. “So you’d like to teach a certain subject? What would that be or is it still open?”

“Physics, I think. And chemistry too.”

“Alright, Monty. The thing is that I don’t have a lot of information on different schools when it comes to students with visual impairments. But I can definitely find it for you. I think what we should do is get you a proper appointment for later so I can find you all the best options. How does that sound?”

Monty grinned. “Sounds great.”

“Great! Did you have something you wanted to talk about, Harper?”

“No, thank you.”

“Then I think we’re settled! If you’ll just give me your number, Monty, and I can contact you when I have everything we need.”

He told her the digits, and then it was time to go. Before he let Harper tug him away, he caught the counselor’s attention once more.

“Miss Cartwig, just so you know… It’s not necessary for the school to be near.”

There was a small pause before she answered. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

“Thank you.”

He took a hold of Harper’s arm and they walked out.

“What do you mean it doesn’t need to be near?” Harper asked as soon as they’d stepped through the front doors.

Monty didn’t answer right away, but she waited. “Well… I’ve been thinking about moving away from –“

“From me?”

“From home. I’m almost an adult. I need privacy. And going to school somewhere a little further away would give me that without having to make excuses. It makes sense.”

“Living on your own? Let me guess; you haven’t talked about it to your parents yet.”

“I haven’t. But I will when I know more.”

Harper stayed quiet for a moment. “Why do you need to get away?”

“Everyone’s the same here. They all know me and won’t ever see me differently. I just want a fresh start. To have people see me for who I am and not for what I can or can’t do.”

Harper rested her hand over his. “Well… I don’t know why you were so nervous about this. And you’ll make a great teacher for sure.”

He’d been nervous because he was expecting to get rejected immediately. Monty wasn’t afraid to dream, but he rarely had to vocalize his ideas. People never asked him what he wanted to be when he grew up. But maybe it was for nothing and he would hear from the agency soon with good news. “I think so too.”

—

On most Wednesdays Monty went to visit his sister Raven. She lived just a fifteen-minute walk away from school, just in the opposite direction of his home. Normally Harper would walk him there before going home, but now it was the first time since they’d started walking with Nathan.

“I can go alone. It’s no big deal”, Monty promised the girl.

“Are you sure? It’s not a problem –”

“Just walk with Nathan. I’ll be fine”, he stood up from the steps they’d been sitting on to show them how serious he was.

“Okay, well… be careful.”

“Yes, mom.”

“Bye, Monty”, Nathan said, brushing past him.

“Bye! You too, Harper.”

“Fine”, she huffed. “See you in the morning.”

Monty waited until he was sure they were gone before leaving. He had his cane in hand and he knew the route. The first time he heard it, he brushed it off.

However, the sound of feet dragging behind him soon became clear. Only when they were close enough, he could hear the breathy, suppressed laughter.

They only did it when he was alone. Monty guessed they were afraid of Harper. He wished they were afraid of him, too.

Like their jokes in class, this had gotten old pretty soon. But Monty couldn’t say anything to them because he had no way of catching them in the act. They followed him for a few blocks, just enough to make him feel paranoid. Above all, it was moments like these that made him want to get out even more. He wanted a new neighborhood, new classmates, and less immature assholes.

When he got to Raven’s, he was in a bad mood. He got into her building and took the elevator up. Monty liked the place a lot: the building was new and even had Braille on the elevator buttons. It was the kind of place he wanted to live in one day.

“Hey, little man!” Raven greeted him as soon as he stepped out of the elevator. She always stood by her window to see him get in through the front doors so she could meet him in the stairway. “How are you?”

“Better if you say you’ll stop calling me that when I turn 18.” He followed Raven into the apartment and stepped aside for her to lock the door.

“I promise to consider it.” She put both of her hands on his arms to signal that he was about to get hugged. No one else did that, but he liked the heads up. “How was school?” Raven asked after letting go.

Monty walked into the kitchen. “It was fine. I’m just tired of all the people there.”

“But you have friends, right? Harper’s in your class?”

“Yeah, and there’s this new guy too. His name is Nathan. He walks home with us. But I don’t mean them”, Monty sat down at the table with a sigh. “I mean everyone else.”

“Isn’t Bell’s stepsister in your class too? Octavia?”

“Yeah, she’s there.”

“So what’s wrong with them?” Raven sat opposite him and brought a cool glass to his hand.

“They’re all just so… I don’t know. They’re not very interested in having me as their friend.”

“Why?”

“They just… don’t”, he said flatly. “Raven, how old were you when you first moved out?”

“Don’t you remember it? I moved in with Bell like a year after graduating high school. He got in to school right after graduation so I moved into his crappy place when I applied a year later. And we got this place about four years ago.”

“It was like seven years ago. I wasn’t paying attention.”

Raven snorted. “Don’t remind me I’m old.”

“You are, though.”

She kicked him in the shin. “Why do you ask?”

He bit his lip, knowing he couldn’t lie to her. “I’ve been thinking about getting a place of my own.”

“But you’re still in school.”

“I know. But after I graduate, I could go to uni somewhere… where I’d need to live on my own.”

“That’s a pretty big step, Mon.”

“I know. That’s the point.”

Raven sighed. “I could talk to mom if you feel that they’re being too overbearing –”

“It’s not just that. I feel like they imagine I’m going to live there forever. Like I’m not able to go to uni and get married and start a life.”

“What, now you’re getting married too?”

He paused so he wouldn’t smile. “No. I was just giving you examples.”

“Alright. I get what you mean, but Mon… don’t get your hopes too high. There’s a lot of circumstances that could change. I’m not saying it won’t happen, but it’ll take its time, okay?”

“I know”, he complied.

—

After leaving Raven’s, he was lost in thought, walking home slower than usually. While wondering what grocery shopping alone would be like, he took a few wrong turns. In the end he made it home, though, unaware of the time passed.

“Monty? Monty!” his mom sounded alarmed when he stepped in through the front door.

“What is it?”

“Where have you been? It’s almost eight! I’ve called Raven a thousand times when you didn’t show. We’ve been worried sick.”

“A thousand, sure”, Monty muttered, trying to push past her.

“Monty! This is why you have a cellphone. You call if something’s wrong –”

“Nothing was wrong! I was walking. Calm down.”

“Monty”, his dad spoke up. “If you want us to think of you as an adult, you’ll have to act like one, too.”

“How am I not acting mature? If you trusted me, you’d have known I was coming because I always come home, don’t I? Why are you both getting so fussy over this?”

His mom sighed. “Raven mentioned you seemed a bit upset so we got worried that you –”

“What?” Monty snapped. “What, am I on suicide watch now too? Do I not get to have puberty and mood swings? You know, how normal teenagers are? I needed some time alone, okay? Now can I go to my room or do you need to cross-examine me some more?”

“Monty…”

“Just leave me alone, okay?” he stomped away, fingers trailing the wall harshly.

—

“Okay, okay, okay, yeah. Bye”, Nathan said to his phone before sighing heavily.

The three of them were lying by Harper’s pool, too lazy to do anything productive. Nathan was a regular part of their routine now; the boy fit in well with them.

“Who was that?” Harper asked lightly. She was lying next to Monty, and he kicked her in the leg.

“My dad, just checking up on me.”

“Sounds a lot like your folks, Monty”, Harper chuckled. “His parents are all up in his business constantly.”

“Well, for me it’s only my dad. My mom died when I was a kid.”

They both made a sympathetic noise.

“Do you have any siblings?” Harper asked again, earning another kick from Monty.

“I have siblings now. My dad remarried and so on”, Nathan explained. “My stepbrother’s a few years older. He’s pretty cool. And they made a new one recently. She’s three now.”

“Aw, I always wanted a little sister”, Harper sighed.

“Not for the first two years, you wouldn’t. She was just a crying machine”, Nathan laughed.

“Is your stepbrother still around?”

Monty gave up on trying to stop the game of 20 questions.

“Yeah, he just quit uni to focus solely on his band. Let’s just say I’m the favorite child at the moment.”

Monty laughed softly. Harper was only getting more fuel for her fire.

“He’s in a band? What does he play? Are they any good?”

“He plays the guitar and sings a little. I’ve heard them play a few times. They’re pretty decent.”

“So cool.”

“Do you play something too, Nathan?” Monty asked.

“Not really. J tried to teach me once but I was awful. So I focus mainly on the listening.”

”Did you know Monty listens to classical music?” Harper giggled.

“Really?”

Monty shrugged. “It’s soothing. And I wanted to play the piano when I was a kid. I wasn’t any good but the music stuck with me.”

“You’ll have to show me sometime, but I think now it’s time I go home. It’s getting late.”

“Yeah, me too”, Monty agreed, pushing himself up.

“Already?” Harper sounded disappointed. “Well hold on. I’ll get dressed and take you –“

“I can walk him home, Harper”, Nathan said. “You don’t have to go back and forth.”

“If you’re sure…”

“It’s fine, H”, Monty assured. “He has to walk past my house anyway.”

“Fine.”

They got dressed and said goodbye to Harper. Nathan had become much more talkative the more they hung out and now he held most of the conversation as they walked.

“His mom screamed at him for like two hours straight. The guy has guts, that’s all I can say”, Nathan snorted.

They were nearing Monty’s house, his hand holding on to Nathan’s bicep. It was a lot different than going with Harper. Nathan’s arms were larger, more defined. He was a little distracted by feeling the muscles move under his fingers.

“He’s following his dream. Maybe that’s brave –“ his foot caught the edge of the pavement and he stumbled slightly.

“Shit, shit, I’m sorry”, Nathan said in the same mortified tone as the time he asked him for an eraser. “I forgot about the step.”

Monty gave him a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry. You’ll remember next time.” He dug out his cane and let it unfold.

Nathan sighed in defeat, but kept going. They didn’t really talk until his gate, but Monty didn’t stop smiling.

—

“Alright, listen up”, miss Griffin said.

Monty stopped typing, and the class let out a collective sigh as they got a break from writing notes.

“We’ll be starting a project. You’ll be working in pairs –”

Harper gripped his arm excitedly.

“But the pairs must consist of two boys or two girls, okay? Girls will be presenting Athens, and boys Sparta.”

Harper’s hand fell and her desk legs scratched against the floor as she moved back in line from her usual position closer to him. Monty felt a hand on his shoulder.

“Want to be my pair?” Nathan asked.

“Yeah”, he grinned, and Nathan squeezed his shoulder lightly before letting go.

After school, Harper stayed behind to plan the project with her partner Lexa. Monty and Nathan walked home together. They’d decided to work on it at Monty’s house.

“Hey, did you already see the new –” Nathan cut himself off, huffing loudly.

“Can’t say I have”, Monty teased.

“I’m sorry”, Nathan said. “Do people ask you stupid questions a lot?”

“Sometimes”, he chuckled. “But I’ve been blind my whole life. Everyone here knows it.”

“Your whole life?”

“Yup, since birth.”

“Oh.”

“I really don’t feel like doing this project”, Monty said to change the subject. “I thought things would get a little more exciting during the last year.”

“Me neither. We should just skip it and go… to the movies.”

Monty bit down a grin as Nathan made a horrified noise.

“I’m sorry. I –”

“A movie sounds good”, Monty said quickly. “I mean, if you want. To go.”

“Will it be any fun for you?”

“Sure.”

Nathan was silent for a moment before pulling to a stop. “Let’s go then.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, it’s not far.”

Monty hid his excited smile the best he could as they turned around and started walking back.

—

He could barely focus on what his parents were saying that night at the dinner table. They’d seen some mediocre slasher movie that was on at the most inappropriate time. Nathan had narrated the whole movie to him.

Monty never went to the cinema. No one ever asked him to go for obvious reasons, and he’d never thought it could be fun.

Nathan had described the action onscreen to him scene by scene through muffled giggles at their ridiculousness. Even when someone shushed them, he didn’t stop doing it. There was a lot of fake blood and guts and according to Nathan it was a terrible movie altogether.

Monty didn’t regret going.

It wasn’t until he heard his mom mention biology, that he remember he was supposed to start warming them up for a suggestion.

“Hey, do you remember this thing I talked to you about earlier?”

“He speaks”, his dad gasped.

“What thing, Monty?” his mom asked.

“School thing. Very important. Has to do with my grade. Involves biology and… camping.”

His mom huffed out a breath. “I thought it wasn’t tied to your grade.”

“Well maybe it has to do with social skills and generally surviving my teen years.”

“So what about it?”

“Nothing really… Just that I can go, right?”

“There hasn’t been any information about it yet.”

“Yeah, but it’s a school camping trip. What can happen?”

“Monty”, his dad sighed. “You know we need more. What are you trying here?”

“It’s a trust exercise. I tell you when it is and you let me go. Easy peasy”, he grinned sheepishly.

“We can’t just let you go without knowing more.”

“You could…”

“Could we not start this fight for one night, please?” his mom pleaded.

He dropped it for now. It was good that he’d started early.

—

“I hate this project. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it”, Harper whined.

“It’s not that bad”, Monty shrugged.

She pretended to push his legs off her lap, making him laugh. “Of course it’s not for you. You get to work with Nathan.”

“Sucks for you.”

“Has he… said anything about me?”

“No”, Monty said, and clearly the answer came too quickly, judging by the sigh Harper let out. “But we didn’t really talk too much yesterday”, he added hastily. “We skipped working altogether and went to the movies instead.”

“What?”

“What what?”

“You went to the movies?”

“Yeah. Nathan wanted to go so we just went.”

“And you didn’t invite me?”

Monty frowned. “Why are you upset? We never go.”

“Well I didn’t know you wanted to.”

“Neither did I!”

“You’d better ask me next time”, Harper muttered. “And what did you even do there?”

“I listened. Nathan described it to me.”

“He’s so thoughtful!”

“Yeah… he is.”

—

Monty dropped his bag on the floor and slumped down on the armchair in the corner of his room. Nathan followed him, closing the door and sitting down by his desk.

Before he could even dig out his books, his phone started ringing loudly. “Hello?”

“Hey, I’m dying.”

“It can’t be that bad, H. Are you still in the library?”

Harper let out a whine. “Yes and I’ll never get out. Did you even start yet?”

“We just got here. Need to start now.”

“Okay”, she sighed. “Well if you get bored and decide to do something else, call me, okay?”

“Of course.”

“Okay, bye.”

“Bye.” Monty set the phone on the edge of the desk. He could almost feel Nathan’s eyes on him. “Harper said she’s dying, but if she survives we should hang out with her.”

“Got it”, Nathan chuckled.

They were quiet for a moment, both getting to their reading.

“Hey, can I look at your iPod for a bit?” Nathan asked suddenly.

“Sure? Did you want your introduction to classical music now?”

“Just want to see what you have in here.”

Monty waited patiently as he tapped on, feeling strangely nervous.

“What’s your favorite?” Nathan asked.

“Oh, uh, I don’t know. I have a lot of favorites…”

“Say one.”

“Well, I like Stravinsky’s stuff from The Firebird. It’s a, uh –”

“Found it.”

The familiar music started playing. They stayed quiet for the duration of it, Monty’s fingers drawing patterns on the edge of his page instead of reading.

“What do you think?” he asked after the song was over.

“I like it. Some of it sounded familiar, though.”

“I think they had it in some Disney movie. Not sure.”

“That might be it.” Nathan went back to tapping on his iPod. “These are all so long. Have you really listened to every one?”

“You get used to it”, Monty shrugged. “So… what kind of music does your brother’s band play?”

Nathan laughed. “I’m not sure. I guess it’s some indie pop punk shit. Who can even tell anymore.”

“Not me.”

“Do you want to hear them? I have their demo on my phone. J forced me to download it”, Nathan snorted.

“Yeah, sure.”

He liked the song. It was catchy and the singer’s voice was nice. It was about love, but he’d learned from Harper that songs like that were supposed to sound dramatic.

“I like it. So they actually play live and stuff? Do they have fans?”

“I guess so. J mostly just talks about the girls in the audience but I suppose people might actually be there to listen. Apparently people can dance to anything.”

“They dance to that?”

Nathan laughed loudly. “They do. Don’t ask me how; the only dancing I’ve done is the slow kind in elementary school. I’m guessing they don’t really do that anymore.”

“What exactly makes the difference between slow and regular dancing?”

“You never slow danced with anyone?”

“Do I look like I ever slow danced with anyone?”

“I don’t see why not.“

"Okay, fine. Show me.”

“What?”

“Show me. If fifth graders can do it, so can you.”

“You got me there”, Nathan’s voice moved closer to him and then his fingers wrapped around Monty’s wrist. "Come on.”

Monty let himself be pulled up and followed Nathan to the center of his room. The boy didn’t say anything, and Monty wanted to reach up and feel if he was smiling too.

“Okay so”, Nathan said finally, “one person puts their arms like this.” He brought Monty’s hands to his shoulders. “And then the other one like this.”

His palms were warm on Monty’s hips. Monty swallowed gravely. “And?”

“Then you sway”, Nathan stated.

“That’s it?”

“Yeah.”

“What’s so special about it then?”

“Well… Usually you’re a lot closer.”

“But?”

“Like they say, you’ve got to leave room for Jesus.”

Monty burst into laughter, and Nathan’s hands dropped. “Priorities.” He missed the weight of them on his hips a little.

“Indeed.”

—

“This is impossible, you know?”

Monty huffed, moving his fingers across the page Nathan had been trying to read. “It’s not impossible. You just suck at it.”

“Ouch. Your teaching methods are going to need some bettering if this is how you do it.”

“This is the one thing I get to gloat about. Let me live, please.”

Nathan chuckled. “Fine. So we agree Braille is your specialty, and I suck at reading it?”

“Also that you’re a loser for giving up.”

“Obviously.”

Monty grinned, and Nathan’s fingers bumped against his.

“So now that we’ve agreed that I’m terrible, you should tell me what you’re bad at.”

He thought for a moment. “I can’t ride a bike.”

“Have you ever tried to learn?”

“No?”

“Then I accept the answer.”

Monty laughed, now trying to push his hand completely off the page. The second he heard the door opening, he pulled his hand back.

“Hi, Nathan. How are you?”

It was his mom.

“I’m fine, thanks. How about you?”

“Just fine. I just wanted to check up on you two.”

“Okay, thanks mom”, Monty said pointedly.

“Alright, alright, I’ll go”, the door clicked shut.

Monty groaned and let his head fall back. Nathan’s knee bumped against his, and it felt like a comforting gesture.

“Oh hey, my brother’s band is playing tonight. Do you want to come see them with me?”

“Uh…”

“And by seeing I mean listen to them play.”

Monty smiled. “You know I don’t mind.”

“You should. I’ll learn.”

“Fine. What time is it?”

“Like ten?”

His smile fell. “My mom would never let me.”

Nathan was quiet for a moment. Monty wasn’t sure he wanted to hear what he’d say next.

“You could… not tell her.”

It caught him off guard. He’d thought Nathan would just say “well maybe next time.”

“Okay.”

For a second he thought about calling Harper. They’d left her at school again. He knew she hated having to do the project with someone else, but he didn’t know how to make her feel better.

Monty would never admit it, but he didn’t feel that bad for not staying around to keep her company. He liked having Nathan’s undivided attention on himself. It was a little selfish, but what he and Harper had was so normal and comfortable, it was exciting to be around someone new.

—

The night was warm when he snuck out of the house. Nathan was already waiting for him outside with his bike. He held onto Monty’s arm as he climbed on the back of it.

Wherever they were, it was loud. Monty was simultaneously nervous and excited.

“Is this a bar?” he asked.

“Maybe… But they have a lot of concerts here so they have the actual bar in a separate area.”

Nathan led him forward, past many groups of noisy people. Monty found that he didn’t have to worry about hitting anyone; Nathan was guiding him excellently. It made him feel all kinds of warm inside.

“Hey, Nate! You made it!”

They stopped and Nathan rested his hand over his for a second to tell him to wait.

“Hi, Wells. This is Monty, my, uh, friend. Monty, this is Wells. He’s in the band.”

“Hello.”

“Hey! So you’re the one who’s been keeping Nate company.”

“I’m a great person.”

Wells laughed. “Try to rub it off on him, too.”

Nathan made an offended noise. “Hey.”

“Hey, babe”, another voice appeared suddenly. “We need to go. Oh hi, Nathan! J’s still backstage. Did you need him?”

“No, we’re here to just listen.”

“Ah, okay. Cool. See you later.”

“Bye, guys”, Wells said.

“Who was she?” Monty asked as soon as he was sure they were gone.

“That was Maya. She’s the lead singer. Dating Wells.”

“Aha.” He was a little pleased it wasn’t someone calling Nathan “babe”.

They found a table and sat down. Nathan left him just for a bit to get them sodas. Monty couldn’t help the jiggle of his foot as he waited.

“Hey, guys. I hope you’re having a good time. We’re Delinquency, and… I hope you like us”, Maya’s voice came from the speakers, and the crowd erupted in cheers.

—

He was still grinning, he knew it. But it was impossible to shake the feeling he was having. The city was quiet around them as Nathan drove him home.

They’d sat through the whole gig together. Every now and then Monty could hear Nathan singing the songs under his breath. It was beyond charming. The thought of it being like a date popped into his head once and after that the whole night was a pleasant torture.

It wasn’t a date. He knew it. But it could’ve been. Nathan had asked him out whether it was as friends or not. Monty had never been on a date before, but he imagined that between Nathan whispering funny commentary about the people in the crowd to him and them playing casual footsie under the table, this was a lot like one.

When it was time to leave, way too late at night, Monty was more awake than ever, buzzing under his skin. It was a difficult feeling to explain. He was often excited, but this was something else. He wanted to shout into the quiet night, outrun cars, kiss someone, stand outside during a storm.

“See you tomorrow”, Monty said quietly after hopping down from the back of Nathan’s bike. “Oh, and tell your brother I’ll be there to buy their album when it comes out.”

“I’ll let him know”, Nathan chuckled. “Good – Shit, I forgot my hoodie in your room earlier.”

He stopped, already halfway through the gate. “I’ll bring it to school tomorrow?”

“Okay, good. Good night, Monty.”

“Good night.”

With his shoes in his hand, Monty made his way through the house. He brushed his teeth as quietly as possible before tiptoeing back to his room. As he was stripping out of his clothes, his hand grazed something soft over the back of his chair. A closer inspection revealed it was Nathan’s hoodie.

The idea sounded crazy in his mind, but that didn’t stop him. Harper had brought it up more than once; the perk of dating someone was getting to wear their clothes. Monty had never really gotten the appeal, but he was… intrigued.

He pulled on the hoodie, and the scent of it hit him like a punch in the gut. It was the smell of whatever soap Nathan used, with a bit of aftershave. He tugged the fabric closer to his face and breathed deeply. The clothes-borrowing made a whole lot of sense.

All he could think about was Nathan’s hands on his hips, holding onto his arm, the feel of his shoulders under Monty’s palms, the way he laughed. He had to lie down.

In the silence of the night, he let himself wonder how Nathan kissed, if he liked to cuddle, how he liked to be touched. He kept breathing against the fabric, one hand trailing down his bare stomach. A shaky sigh left him as he scratched over the coarse hairs below his navel to the waistband of his boxers. With another deep breath, Monty slid his hand underneath and wrapped his fingers around his cock.

It didn’t take long; his strokes fast and desperate, other hand brushing lower. When he was finished and his breathing settled, he wriggled out of his underwear and pulled the sheet over himself. Sleep took over him quickly, all energy drained out.

—

“Raven… You’re in love with Bellamy right?”

His sister’s fingers stilled for a moment where they were running through his hair. “Well, yeah. We are engaged, you know?”

Monty nudged her hand with his head to get her to continue. They were lying on her couch at the end of another Wednesday visit. “I know, I know. But how do you know? That you’re in love.”

“Well… sometimes first you’re attracted to them and then you want to get to know them. Then after getting to know them, you realize that, fuck, they’re all you can think about. You want to be around them all the time. You want to make them laugh. It doesn’t have to be more complicated than that. They’re like your best friend… that you want to kiss a lot. And I don’t know; maybe want to make babies with when you’re old or something.”

“That’s like the least helpful explanation ever.”

“Excuse me!” Raven smacked the side of his head gently. “You asked, I delivered. That’s how Bell and I are at least. I like his face, he likes mine. We get along. Boom, love.”

“I don’t know why I thought you’d be a romantic.”

“You’re my brother. It’s a little weird.”

“I should’ve asked Bellamy.”

“Even weirder.”

“What do you think he would say?”

Raven chuckled softly. “He’s more poetic. He’d probably talk about hearts and souls and stuff. But can you blame him; it’s me he loves.”

Monty reached back to touch her face. Before she tried to bite at his fingers, her smile was wide. “Gross. Shouldn’t you be done with being so into each other? With, you know, being old and stuff.”

“Are you asking to get your ass kicked?”

The doorbell rang, and Monty pushed himself up, unable to fight a smile.

“Saved by the bell”, Raven snorted. “How funny would it be if that was actually Bellamy. Mom’s early.”

“It’s not mom. Nathan’s picking me up. We have to work on our project.” He got up and went to get the door. He could hear Raven following him, so he tried to hold a more neutral expression. As he unlocked the door and Nathan greeted him, he knew it was a wasted effort.

—

“Who was that?” Harper asked the second the call ended.

Monty took a moment to pocket his phone before answering. “Miss Cartwig. The guidance counselor.”

“What did she want?”

“She said I should come by sometime. Good news apparently.”

“Oh”, Harper said. “So you’re really going to leave, huh?”

The truth was that he wasn’t so sure anymore. He still wanted to live on his own, to feel like he had a life of his own. But maybe he didn’t need to move so far away. Certainly trying it out would be easier in an environment he already knew. And his family and friends could visit easily.

Before he could answer, a cheery voice spoke up at his side.

“Hey, guys!” Octavia chirped.

They mumbled their hellos.

“Have you seen Nathan around?”

“He’ll probably be here in a minute.”

Octavia’s long hair brushed Monty’s arm as she sat beside him. “He’s not seeing anyone is he?”

“Don’t know”, Harper said.

“He’d better not be. That’d be just unfair.”

“Oh so you’re going after him then?”

“He’s, like, the hottest guy in the school”, Octavia stated like it answered the question.

The words felt like cold water down Monty’s back. He didn’t even want to think about Nathan dating anyone, having someone wear his hoodies, hold his hand.

“There he is. Bye!”

Harper let out a long sigh. “Unfair indeed.”

“What are they doing?”

“She’s talking to him. Smiling, of course. Reaching out to touch his chest. Now arm.”

Monty frowned. He didn’t have any right to be jealous, but he couldn’t help it.

“Laughing together –”

“Let’s go inside. The bell’s about to ring.”

“Shouldn’t we wait for –”

“Come on.”

—

They were walking home together, and all Monty wanted to do was ask. He had to know. If Nathan did like Octavia, he could start getting over his crush. It would hurt, but not knowing was worse.

“Monty… do you think we could do without the cane?”

“You sure?”

“I asked, didn’t I?”

He laughed lightly, folding the cane and putting it back to the side pocket of his backpack. “Are you sure you can handle it?”

“I can handle anything.”

Monty took his arm again and they kept going. Now it was his time to ask.

“So how do you like the class?” Not even close.

“It’s alright. Everyone’s nice. Well, except for that Finn guy. Don’t know what his problem is.”

“No one does.”

Nathan huffed out a laugh. “Are you going to the party on Friday?”

“Whose party is it?”

“Octavia’s. Her birthday party or something. She’s inviting everyone.” Nathan’s hand covered his. “Step up.”

He took the step.

“So do you think you’ll go?”

“I’m not sure. Spending time with our classmates isn’t something I’d describe as fun.”

“Have you ever given them a chance? Octavia’s really nice. And I’ll be there, obviously.”

“Yeah… I guess it’s not the worst idea.”

—

“We should go.”

Monty frowned. He and Nathan were waiting outside the school for Harper to come out so they could go home. “Are you kidding? She was so mad yesterday. Imagine what she’d say if we didn’t wait for her.”

The previous day they’d arrived at Monty’s, when Nathan’s phone rang. He answered it and soon brought it to Monty’s hand, saying it was Harper. She sounded angry when she asked where they were. He was confused because she was supposed to be working on the project with Lexa, but apparently she wasn’t after all. In the end she hung up on him.

“She, um, just left.”

“What?”

“Didn’t look at us. Just walked past.”

Monty groaned. “She’s really mad at me.”

“I’m sure she’ll come around. Come on”, Nathan tugged on his sleeve as he stood up.

Monty took his arm with a sigh. They were still inside the yard when someone called his name.

“Oi, Monty! You finally got a boyfriend?” Finn yelled after him.

“Ignore him”, Nathan muttered.

Monty wasn’t about to do that. He turned around and flipped the boy off. Their response was just laughter. Just in case he got out his cane again.

“Come on”, Nathan said. His voice was tight.

Monty wondered if he was uncomfortable. Maybe he didn’t like him holding his arm when others could see. Maybe he didn’t like Finn thinking they were together.

He missed Harper. She would’ve started a fight, told them to fuck off. He hoped she wasn’t really mad at him.

—

“I was thinking about moving into my own place when I go to university”, he blurted out in the middle of dinner.

The silence that followed lasted forever. All he could do was wait.

“What do you mean?”

“I’d like to live on my own.”

His mom laughed. “Why would you need to do that? It’s easiest if you –”

“That’s the thing. I don’t want it to be the easiest. My life’s been exactly the same always. It’s supposed to change at some point. I’m not a kid anymore.”

“You must be joking. How are you supposed to live on your own?”

“It’s hard to picture, isn’t it? Because I’ve been coddled all my life. I want to feel normal, okay? You’ve always told me I shouldn’t let anything stop me. Why are you stopping me then?”

“Monty, you must understand that –” his dad tried.

“No, university is too soon. It’s out of the question.”

Monty pushed himself up and left the table without another word. He was fuming as he fell on his bed. She was being unfair and unreasonable. She couldn’t keep him there forever.

He almost missed the soft knock on his door sometime later. Someone stepped into the room.

“I’m sleeping”, Monty muttered into his pillow, facing the wall.

“Good”, his dad closed the door and leaned against it. “Then you can’t talk back.”

He huffed but stayed quiet.

“Son, you know we only want the best for you. Your mother is only worried about you. And after you’re gone, the nest is empty. You’re a smart kid; you know what kind of things worry us about you being on your own.

I understand you want to feel more independent - we don’t want to stop you from doing so. But your safety will always come first to us. And you should truly think about the reasons behind this need to get away. Because we will support you every step of the way. We just need to see that you’re doing it for the right reasons. One of them being that you’re ready.”

Monty sighed. “I know.”

“Good. Sleep tight, son.”

—

“Hey! There you are!”

Monty smiled as Nathan touched his arm briefly. “Yup. Socializing against better judgement.”

“It’s not so bad.”

“Not yet.”

Nathan led him further into the house - Octavia’s house that is. The party was already in good swing. The music was a little too loud and people kept passing him, smelling like alcohol. Monty didn’t regret coming just yet; he’d been lucky to talk his parents into letting him attend this and the school camping trip that weekend.

“You just need an attitude adjustment”, Nathan laughed. “Or a drink. Do you drink?”

“Not usually”, Monty admitted.

“It’s cool. I doubt you’re missing out on anything. You can only drink so much beer.”

“Right”, Monty snorted. “Is Harper here? She’s still not talking to me.”

“Me neither. But she’s here. You should talk to her.”

They’d stopped walking so Monty felt around his surroundings. They were by a wall, just far enough from the speakers to be able to talk normally. “She doesn’t want to talk to me.”

Nathan rubbed his arm, the contact startling him first, then making his cheeks flush. “She’ll get over it.”

They stayed put for a while, Nathan keeping up a steady commentary of whatever was happening. Monty couldn’t understand how everyone didn’t fall in love with him the moment they met him.

“Hi, guys! Glad you could make it!”

“Happy birthday”, Monty wished Octavia, silently grudging that she interrupted the moment.

“Thank you! So… want to give me my birthday present?”

There was a small pause.

“Who? Me?” Monty frowned.

“Yes, you! Come dance with me!”

A slow song had just started, and Monty’s throat was suddenly very dry.

“Remember what I taught you”, Nathan whispered in his ear, breath hitting the side of his neck. In a normal tone of voice he added: “I’ll go get a drink. Play nice, O.”

“I always do”, the girl giggled. She grabbed Monty’s hand and pulled him away from the wall.

He figured it shouldn’t have been a surprise that Octavia knew how to lead just fine.

“Can I ask you something?” she asked suddenly.

“Uh, sure?”

“Do you think he likes me?”

“Who?”

“Nathan”, Octavia huffed. “He’s super nice, but I just can’t read him, you know? So I thought maybe you could help me out.”

“I really don’t know. He doesn’t really talk about his… love life.”

“Are you sure? He hasn’t mentioned anything at all?”

“No, sorry. I’m as informed as you are.”

She sighed. “Alright. Could you maybe put in a good word for me, though?”

“Sure, I guess?”

“Thank you! You’re such a good friend.” She hugged him closer for a second.

She sounded so happy Monty felt a little bad about the negative thoughts he’d ever had of her. The song was nearing its end. He asked Octavia to direct him back to where he’d been standing earlier, hoping Nathan was already there.

He wasn’t. Octavia disappeared to entertain her other guests.

When a hand clamped down on his shoulder, Monty thought for a second that it was Nathan. But the bitter burn of alcohol on the boy’s breath and the uncomfortable grip told him otherwise.

“Hey, buddy.”

It was Finn.

“We’re going to play a little game. You get to go first. Come with me.”

“What? Where?”

“Just come on. Don’t be a baby.”

He shouldn’t have gotten so upset over it but he did. So he let the boy drag him away from the dance floor.

“What is the game?” he asked when they walked through a doorway.

“Uh, seven minutes in heaven”, Finn said.

“What? No –”

On the other side of the wall the music had stopped and someone was announcing something.

“Stay.”

Monty heard the door close. He didn’t have a good feeling about it. But he wasn’t going to be a baby.

The room was a bedroom. He sat down gingerly and waited. Something cold touched his hand, and he muffled a shout. It was a small, long-haired dog. Monty remembered hearing something about Octavia having one. The animal sat by his side and he scratched its back.

He didn’t want to get paranoid, but some time had passed. Sitting there alone felt more and more strange by the second.

Before he could start imagining what seven minutes alone with Nathan would be like, shouting came from the other side of the wall. The door was opened aggressively, and Monty recognized the voice as Harper’s, yelling obscenities at someone.

“Come on, Monty. Let’s go”, she took his arm as he stood up and dragged him along.

“What are you – Harper?”

She didn’t answer until after he felt a breeze on his face and a door slammed shut behind them.

“Let’s go home, Mon.”

“So now you’re talking to me? What is going on?”

“Let’s just go.”

“No! You don’t get to do that! What the hell is going on?”

“Okay, fine! Deal with it yourself!”

He reached out for her but her footsteps were already on the stone path that led to the driveway. Instead, his fingers hit something else as the door shut again.

“Hey whoa”, Nathan took a hold of his hand that had jabbed him in the chest. “Are you okay?”

“No, I’m not okay”, he pulled his hand free. “I don’t know what’s going on, and Harper just left.”

“We should go, too…”

“I want to know what’s going on! Why is it so hard to tell me?”

“Why are you yelling at me? I don’t know what happened. I was with Octavia and –”

“Right, of course. Well why don’t you go back to that, and I’ll stay out here, not knowing what’s going on and not kissing anyone like always.”

He could barely register what happened next. Nathan’s hands cupped his face between them and his lips pressed against Monty’s. It was brief and accompanied by a sharp intake of breath. It was over as quickly as it had began, and someone could’ve said it didn’t even happen.

But Monty knew it had happened. He stood still, dumbstruck and smiling softly, and Nathan was gone.

——

Getting on the bus with Octavia a little late just to have the class catcall them loudly, and seeing the closed off look on Monty’s face, only confirmed Nathan’s earlier suspicions. He was utterly fucked.

After the party he had driven home, cursing himself for not only crossing the line but stomping all over it until you couldn’t really even see it anymore. He’d been drinking, but it was barely an excuse for the conscious decision he’d made in that moment. After all, it was something he’d wanted to do for weeks.

Very quickly after meeting Monty, he’d realized just how much he liked the boy. He constantly caught himself watching him and had to tell himself to stop so Harper wouldn’t notice and think he was a creep. Or Monty’s sister, Raven, who he’d met once. She’d looked like she knew exactly what he was thinking when Monty smiled at him. And he felt like it wasn’t right that he got to just stare away when Monty couldn’t tell and express his possible discomfort over it.

Most of the time he was surprised Monty even wanted to be around him. It took him a good while to stop blurting out stupid things and learn how to casually help him around. Next to Harper he was an amateur.

Nathan didn’t mind the other kids in his class, but Harper and Monty becoming his friends had felt like a godsend. He could tell the two were incredibly close, having known each other all their lives. To him, it seemed like Harper was harboring a crush on her best friend, but Monty was blissfully unaware. At least he hoped Monty was, after realizing he was on the same boat.

When he and Monty had started working on the history project together, he’d been excited to get to spend more time with him alone. Simultaneously, Nathan feared he’d sooner or later end up doing something he didn’t mean to do. The more time they spent together, the worse his crush got. Monty was too sweet and funny and cute for it to not happen.

On multiple occasions he found himself faced with the opportunity to do something. When he had his hands on Monty’s waist, the distance would’ve been easy to close. When they were sitting side by side, bickering over Braille, he could’ve made a move. He’d had many chances but he’d taken none of them.

He liked Monty more than he’d ever liked anyone. And for some reason that made it all more difficult. Getting rejected would hurt, not only him but their friendship. Nathan didn’t have that many friends. He couldn’t afford losing his closest ones.

When Monty was dancing with Octavia at her party, Nathan had ran into Harper. She’d clearly been drinking and didn’t seem very happy to see him. He’d sat by her side against the wall, hoping to maybe be able to help fix whatever it was that was straining her and Monty’s relationship.

“It’s your fault, you know”, Harper muttered, catching him off guard. “You changed everything.”

“What do you mean?”

“Before you it was just the two of us. He would’ve never ditched me.”

“It was an accident.”

“It was you. All he needs is you now. Not me. I’m old news”, she took another sip, cringing at the taste.

“You’re his best friend. You should talk to him.”

“Because that solves everything.”

“Usually it does.”

Harper was quiet for a moment. “It doesn’t matter anymore. He just wants to leave.”

“What do you mean?”

“He wants to leave. Move away. Leave me here all alone.”

He hadn’t heard about that before. Monty had never mentioned it. He took the cup from Harper’s hand and threw back whatever it was.

“You should still be honest with him.” It was a lot coming from him, but that wasn’t the point.

“Sure.”

“I’m serious, H. He doesn’t know why you’re mad at him. It doesn’t mean he doesn’t care.”

“But he cares more about you. Otherwise none of this would’ve happened.”

He didn’t know what to say. The idea of Monty favoring him was obviously nice for him, but that wasn’t fair. “I’m sorry. For getting between you two. I didn’t mean to. It’s just the project. I’m not intentionally keeping him away from you.”

“You should’ve seen how we were before”, Harper sighed. “Just the two of us. We never fought.”

“You should tell him this. He wants to make up. Just give him a chance.”

“You don’t like me, do you?”

Again, he was caught off guard. “Of course I like you.”

“But not in the way a girl like me would like a boy like you to like me.”

Harper met his eyes without hesitation, and he had no idea how she was so courageous. “No.”

“Alright. It’s late”, Harper got up and dusted off her skirt. “See you later.”

Just as she was about to walk away, someone ran into her and spilled their drink on her. Nathan jumped up in case he needed to stop a fight. Fortunately Octavia appeared and started fussing.

“Come on. I’ll find you a dry shirt”, she grabbed Harper’s hand and pulled her towards the back of the house.

It wasn’t until Harper rushed past him again, a new shirt haphazardly thrown on, that Nathan realized he should’ve probably been somewhere else as well. He turned to Octavia. “Monty’s still here, right?”

“Yeah, Harper just went to find him.”

The yelling had started by then, and he followed it to the living room. Harper was pulling Monty out of the house. Most of the party guests looked confused about what was going on. Nathan noticed Finn was smiling, though, and he decided to go after his friends instead of punching the smug looking boy in the face.

So he kissed Monty. Right outside Octavia’s front door. And then he ran.

Well, biked. Still, he’d done a very bad thing. Monty was his friend who trusted him. Kissing him without asking was awfully unfriend-like. He would have to face him after this. Maybe he could still apologize.

They’d never talked about liking anyone. Nathan couldn’t really guess how Monty would react to him admitting his feelings. When Finn had suggested they were boyfriends, Monty hadn’t reacted very positively. At the time, Nathan had been more upset over the cane returning, because it had felt like a demotion. Not that it was his place to judge; Monty and Finn clearly had a history of not getting along.

When he got home after the party, his brother’s friends were still there as his dad and stepmom were out of town with their youngest. As soon as he was through the front door, he was faced with a tired looking Maya in her pajamas. She took one look at him and frowned.

“You okay?”

“Yeah, sure, I guess”, he muttered, looking for a way past her.

“You wanna talk about it?”

“No, it’s fine. I need to shower. Camp thing tomorrow.”

“Okay”, Maya didn’t look convinced. “We’ll be in the living room if you change your mind.”

“Okay, thanks”, he rushed to his room.

Under the pour of the shower, he just stood and stared at the wall. The next day he would have to talk to Monty. It wasn’t fair to him not to. But it felt so difficult.

Afterwards he threw on some sweatpants and a hoodie and made his way to the living room.

“Hey, Nate! How was the party?” J threw a pillow at him.

He curled up in an armchair and hugged the pillow to his chest. “It was okay. I did something dumb though.”

“Bad or just drunk?” his brother’s best friend, Murphy, asked.

“I don’t know…”

“Then it can’t be too bad.”

“What happened?” Maya stepped in.

“I, um, kissed someone. My friend”, Nathan admitted, chewing on his lower lip and not meeting any of their eyes.

Maya’s voice was gentle. “Do you like this friend of yours? Romantically, that is. Or do you not want them to think you like them?”

“I like them… a lot.”

“So does Monty not like you back?”

Maya, Wells and Roma all made an exasperated noise and glared at J.

“Be a little discreet, asshat!” Roma smacked him with a pillow.

“I thought it was obvious! You literally almost tripped over your cymbal after the gig, trying to ask me if the kid with Nate was his boyfriend”, J pointed at her accusingly.

“Yeah John, you and not him!” she huffed.

“Ignore your idiot brother”, Maya sighed.

“It was him”, Nathan muttered. “I kissed him.”

“So is this a gay freak out?”

The three groaned in unison at Murphy.

“I didn’t mean it in a bad way!”

“Dude, you know I have two moms, right?” J asked. “This family has gone past gay freak outs like ten years ago.”

“Both of you shut up”, Maya kicked him in the shin. “He’s allowed to have his own feelings. Nate? You don’t think he’ll be mad at you, do you? He’s your friend.”

“Yeah, so it’ll be weird.”

“Is he not… into boys?”

“I don’t know. But kissing a friend is never a good idea.”

“I kissed Wells. We were friends”, Maya said carefully.

He finally looked up.

“You really like him so he must be a nice kid. Even if he didn’t like you back, he wouldn’t be rude about it. And who knows. Maybe he does.”

“You think so?”

“Why wouldn’t he like you!” J offered.

“It’s his loss”, Roma agreed.

“You should just talk to him”, Wells added. “Clear things out.”

“But it’s hard”, Nathan groaned, hiding behind his pillow.

“It’s supposed to be. If you’re willing to go through the trouble, it’s a good sign.”

“I hate this.”

“Love hurts, buddy”, J reached over to pat the top of his head.

—

He spent the bus ride trying to figure out what to say to Monty. Octavia barely noticed he wasn’t paying attention.

It wasn’t until a few hours after they’d arrived at the camping site that he got a moment alone with Monty. Everyone else was collecting samples for their research, but the boy was just sitting alone.

“Hey”, he sat down next to him on the bench.

“Hi”, Monty said, tucking his legs to his chest and resting his chin on his knees.

“How’s your research going?”

“I’m having a lot of fun”, Monty deadpanned.

Nathan laughed, some of his nerves dissolving. He just watched the boy for a moment, trying to get the words out.

Monty cleared his throat. “So… Octavia’s party was… something.”

In that moment he froze. He couldn’t do it. This was the moment. He should’ve explained, apologized, admitted… but he didn’t. “I can’t remember much of. I was… pretty drunk.”

“Oh.”

He couldn’t look at Monty, too embarrassed of the obvious lie. “Yeah, J wouldn’t stop making fun of me all morning.”

Monty let out a laugh that sounded forced. Nathan glanced at him, and he looked… disappointed. He told himself to stop imagining things.

He’d just blown his chances of making this easy. Now he had lied and if Monty wanted to talk about it, he wouldn’t be able to.

There was no other choice but to try to return to normal.

“Want to come help me with some biology?” he asked.

“Clearly I’m the man for the job”, Monty huffed but got up anyway.

—

Normal wasn’t the best choice of words. Nathan found himself stuck wondering why Monty didn’t mention him kissing him. It didn’t even make sense because he’d made sure Monty thought he wouldn’t know what he was talking about. Maybe it bothered him that Monty believed him so easily. Like he would forget kissing him.

After they were done with all the boring school related stuff, the class was let loose at the camping site pool. Nathan went in with the others and had a quick water fight with Octavia and some others, but soon enough he was sneaking glances at Monty and decided to just go sit with him. He got out of the pool, ducking out of the way of a rubber ring that flew his way.

“Hey”, he dropped down next to Monty, grabbing his towel to dry himself off.

“Don’t tell me you can’t swim after all.”

“Sorry, I can’t lie anymore”, he snorted.

He saw the ball flying towards them almost as soon as it slipped from one boy’s hands, and caught it easily. Monty made an alarmed noise as droplets of water fell on his back. Nathan threw the ball back swiftly and grabbed his towel again.

“Hold on”, he said and wiped them off of his skin.

“Thanks”, Monty smiled softly, making Nathan’s chest hurt a little.

“Hey, if you guys need some time alone, you should let us know.”

He didn’t even have to look up to see it was Finn, grinning at them from the edge of pool. Monty looked mortified. “Go fuck yourself already, Collins.”

The boy dove in and left them alone, but things were definitely uncomfortable now. Nathan wasn’t sure if it was possible to go back to the way things were.

Kissing Monty had stopped his crush from being just a passing thing; just thinking about it made him space out for a moment. He was so utterly gone and there was nothing he could do about it.

When all the others had already left the pool, the two of them were still sitting by it. Monty hadn’t really said much, and Nathan was busy pretending he wasn’t staring at his body.

“You can go already if you want”, Monty said suddenly.

“It’s fine. What are we waiting for, though?”

Monty looked uncomfortable, crossing his arms over his bare chest. “I don’t want to shower with everyone there.”

Nathan ran his hands over his face. Communal showers were the last thing he’d thought about. The universe was playing a cruel joke on him.

“I think they’re probably gone by now.”

“If they’re not, I’m not going.”

“Then we’ll wait. But let’s go check”, Nathan tapped Monty’s arm and the boy pushed himself up grudgingly. “Do you, uh, need me to not be there?” he asked carefully as they walked towards the locker room.

“No, I – I trust you. Not them.”

He felt even worse then. Monty trusted him while he had to actually focus on not thinking about being in the same room with him naked. Because it wasn’t the first time he’d thought about it, and nowhere near appropriate.

The room was empty when they walked in, as were the showers. They got their things from their lockers before making their way to the showers.

“There’s no one here”, Nathan guided him to a bench on the side of the room. “You can leave your towel and clothes on this.”

Monty set down his towel, but did nothing else. “I’m good.”

“You’ll shower with your clothes on?”

“They’re swimming shorts and shut up.”

“Whatever you say”, he chuckled and stripped out of his own. He brought Monty to one of the showers and showed him quickly how it worked before taking the next one himself.

He was doing alright; not staring at the water sliding down Monty’s back or anything else creepy. He was doing alright until Monty pushed down his shorts. Nathan almost breathed in water as he gasped soundlessly. Monty had a really nice ass, and he had to shut his eyes for a moment and turn the heat of his spray down a bit.

“Do you think they’ll be partying tonight?” Monty asked, completely oblivious to his struggles.

“I guess. Why? Are you thinking about getting drunk?”

“Maybe.” Monty grinned - and the reason he saw it was because he was now facing him and Nathan couldn’t stop himself in time to not have his eyes rake over his body slowly and painfully.

He took in the narrow shoulders, the veins on the insides of his arms, the trail of dark hair below his navel, the v of his hips that wasn’t really helping him not to look. He’d wished the first time he got to see Monty’s dick, they’d both be a lot happier about it. Which was exactly the opposite of what he was supposed to be thinking, especially with blood going south from his brain way too fast.

“I’m done”, he said quickly, turning off his shower.

“Okay”, Monty pushed his hair back from his face.

Nathan wanted to die just a little bit.

“Would you drink with me if I did?”

“Sure”, he answered. I’d do anything with you if you asked, was fortunately what he didn’t say. He wrapped his towel tightly around his hips and sat down on the bench, eyes tightly on the floor.

——

The day after the kiss, Monty just lied in his bed. He hadn’t heard from Nathan or Harper, but he knew they’d be on the bus with him soon. They would leave for the camp later that day, and Monty was hoping most of the others were hungover and silent.

Clearly it didn’t happen, and as he sat on the bus, the noise was just obnoxious. He hadn’t slept much because he couldn’t stop thinking about the kiss. The yelling and loud laughter weren’t helping his case.

Fortunately Monty really liked their biology teacher, Anya, who had been able to convince his parents he’d be fine. She’d personally told him about what they’d do for the afternoon and how he could participate. Monty felt a little uncomfortable because Harper wasn’t with him, but he knew she was still mad at him.

Right before they were about to leave, two people were still missing from the bus. Monty wished he didn’t have to hear the others yelling inappropriate things at Octavia and Nathan, who arrived late.

Nathan had kissed him and not Octavia. Well, at least as far as he knew. Monty just really wanted to talk to him in private and find out why he ran off. For a moment he’d let himself worry that Nathan thought it was a mistake, but he decided to not draw conclusions too early.

Still, it was gnawing at his insides. He needed to know what Nathan was thinking. You didn’t get kissed by your crush every day - it only happened in those movies Harper loved to watch. There might actually be a chance that Nathan liked him back.

When Nathan came to him, he expected him to say something. In the end, he had to bring it up himself.

“I can’t remember much of. I was… pretty drunk”, Nathan said.

Monty could feel his stomach drop. Nathan had been drunk. He’d only kissed him because he was drunk and probably felt sorry for him. Monty wished the ground would swallow him right at that moment.

Nathan’s lips hadn’t really tasted like alcohol. Maybe he just didn’t remember it right. And at the chance that he was lying, why would he. The only reason could be that he regretted it. He didn’t want to talk about it to Monty.

He figured all he could do was pretend it didn’t happen.

—

After they were finished with collecting samples, Monty found himself sitting alone again. The others were now being loud in the pool, and he didn’t even want to try going in. Nathan came to sit with him after a while, though, and Monty gave up on pitying himself. Instead, he would just be Nathan’s friend like before.

He could hear the snap of Nathan catching something right before the chilly water hit his back. Unaware of what the boy was doing, Monty stayed still when Nathan told him to wait.

Nathan’s fingers were cool against his back when they grazed his skin as he dried Monty’s back. It made him feel warm inside, as simple as it was. Of course nothing good ever lasted.

“Hey, if you guys need some time alone, you should let us know”, Finn yelled at them. He didn’t need to see to know it was aimed at them. It was Finn; of course he was there to ruin things for him.

He was worried that in the case that Nathan did remember the kiss and was just lying, he’d get uncomfortable at the comment. Just like the time before on the schoolyard. His suspicions were confirmed as Nathan told the boy to fuck off, voice tight.

Monty didn’t know what to say after that so he stayed quiet. He just sat there, wondering how long it would take for Nathan to make his escape.

When he first started hearing people leave, he tried to count how many of them went at once. More and more people were heading for the showers, the pool emptying and the splashing quieting down. He had no intentions to leave his chair until he was certain no one else was in the showers.

Just the thought of someone seeing him naked without him knowing made him uncomfortable. He wasn’t insecure about his body - easy for you without anyone to compare yourself to, Harper had said - but he didn’t trust the other boys one bit. Nathan was a different story. Monty had heard enough of Harper’s stories to know it was a common way of seduction to get naked in front of someone. He wanted Nathan to want to look at him. He’d just have to be confident and nonchalant about it.

Except that he chickened out. As the tried to wash himself with his shorts on, he cursed himself. Nathan probably thought he was really strange.

With that thought he got out of his shorts, still keeping his back to Nathan, and took a deep breath. The boy didn’t say anything, but Monty had a plan. If he’d gotten kissed while drunk once before, it could happen again. He just needed Nathan to be there with him.

Nathan was still quiet when Monty turned towards him. Soon after the boy turned off his spray. With a sigh, Monty accepted that Nathan just wasn’t that attracted to him.

—

There was going to be a bonfire. Monty sat on the ground with Nathan, feeling less and less interested in attempting to get drunk. He was a little upset and just wanted to talk to Harper about it all.

“Hi!” Octavia’s voice came near his ear as she most likely stumbled to sit next to him. “You drunk yet?”

“No”, Nathan snorted. “Hey, Harper.”

Monty heard his best friend mumble a response, and his heart skipped a beat. How could they ever make up if she refused to talk to him?

“O, how about you and I go get something to drink?” Nathan said.

“Sure!” she chirped.

“What about me?” Monty frowned.

“I was trying to be subtle. You two need to talk.” Nathan and Octavia got up from his sides and their chatter receded as they walked away.

Monty reached far out for Harper’s arm and tugged on it until she shuffled closer with a sigh. “I’m sorry, H”, he said without letting go of her. “I should’ve been more considerate.”

“You should’ve.”

“I got carried away, I guess. But I never meant to make you feel like I don’t love you anymore.”

Harper leaned her head on his shoulder. “I’m sorry too. For leaving you at the party and for the silent treatment.”

“You’re a massive drama queen. I shouldn’t have expected anything less”, Monty pinched her arm.

“True”, Harper shrugged. “But still it wasn’t cool.”

“I haven’t really – Finn was fucking with me, wasn’t he? At the party?”

“Yeah.”

Monty sighed. “One day he’ll get punched in the dick so hard we’ll all feel better.”

Harper cackled. “Hopefully by me.”

“Hopefully.”

“So I hear you want to get drunk tonight.”

“Yup.”

“Should we go get Nathan and Octavia and get started with that?”

“They can find us later if they want to. I’m only concerned about my best friend today.”

“Kiss-ass.”

—

He didn’t know what they were drinking, but it didn’t taste too bad and he was nearing a state where it didn’t matter much anyway.

“Did you know Octavia and I are going to be mostly applying to the same universities?” Harper giggled. “I think we might be friends now.”

“It was bound to happen, I think.”

“It’s been a weird fall”, she sighed. “We’re so old.”

“We’re technically gazing at stars. Isn’t that pretty youthful?”

“Most excitement we’ve had.”

“Can I tell you something?”

“Is it exciting?”

“Maybe.”

“Well shoot.”

Monty bit his lip. “I like someone.”

“Times really have changed.”

“I’m serious. I might be in love here.”

“Oh really now?” Harper rolled closer to him. “Let’s hear it then.”

“Nathan. I really like Nathan”, he said, letting out a relieved breath.

Harper was quiet for a moment, and Monty couldn’t do much else but wait. Suddenly, a nearly hysterical fit of laughter bubbled out of Harper’s mouth and the heat of her body moved away from his.

“Why are you laughing?” he pouted, reaching out for her.

“I’m sorry”, Harper took his hand. “It just all makes so much sense now.”

“What?”

“I thought you didn’t want to be friends anymore. But you were really just crushing on him. I’m so relieved”, she gushed.

“I’m glad my heartache is amusing you”, Monty snorted as she hiccuped.

“Heartache my ass! You have a crush on Nathan.”

“Shut up. Someone might hear you.”

“No one’s near. But Mon, why haven’t you made a move on him? What kind of a sign are you still waiting for?”

“He kissed me.”

“What?”

He had to cover his ears against the shrillness of her voice. “And now he’s saying he doesn’t remember it. So yeah - heartache.”

“But he fucking kissed you! Holy shit!”

“I know”, Monty sighed. “Why won’t he just love me back?”

“Why do you think he doesn’t?”

“Octavia. I think he likes her. She thinks he’s hot. I’m sure he thinks she’s hot.”

“Oh.”

“What?” he tugged on Harper’s hand. “What?”

“They… left holding hands.”

Monty could feel his eyes stinging, but he blamed it on the alcohol. “Oh.”

“But hey! We’re holding hands now and we’re friends”, Harper rolled towards him again and hugged his side. “I’m serious, Mon. If the boy won’t come around, it’s his loss. You’re a catch.”

“It was my first kiss, H. I really like him. I don’t know what I’ll do if he –”

“We won’t think about that now, okay? We’ll worry about it when we’re sober and at home. Got it?”

“Yes.”

—

To be reasonable, the fact that he threw up after getting home wasn’t solely his own fault. Clearly it was the bus and the bumpy roads they drove on. Either way, since he couldn’t exactly tell his mom they’d been drinking on a school trip, she thought he’d caught a bug.

He was fine with being “sick” for a few days. He wasn’t especially looking forward to returning to his daily routine just yet. Well, to being Harper’s friend, yes, but being Nathan’s, no.

“Are you feeling any better?” his mom asked that night. The edge of his bed dipped slightly as she sat down.

“A little”, he answered, trying to look as weak as possible.

“I should’ve known something like this –”

“Mom…”

“I know, I know”, she stroked his cheek gently. “You’ll be 18 in just a few weeks. I need to start thinking of you as an adult.”

“I’ll still be your kid.”

“I know. You’re just growing up so fast. I could swear Raven was so much slower.”

“Can I tell her that?”

She chuckled. “I wanted to say something about the moving thing –”

“It was just an idea. Nothing’s set in stone yet. I just wanted you to –”

“Sweetie, don’t worry. You know your father and I will always worry over you. But I know you’ll be fine on your own. As long as I can still visit, I’m okay with whatever you choose.”

He didn’t know what to say. “Thank you.”

She pressed a kiss to the top of his head before getting up. She reached the door but didn’t open it right away. “Are you doing okay? You’ve seemed a little down lately.”

“Just a… you know.”

“A teen thing?”

“Yeah, I guess.”

“Got it.” The door opened and she stepped outside, closing it behind her.

Monty hadn’t really decided anything yet. But now things felt a lot easier to think about.

—

It happened on the third day of him missing school. Harper had pretended to bring him his homework the previous day so he assumed she’d do it that day as well. However, when the doorbell rang and he went to open the gate, it wasn’t Harper.

“Hi”, Nathan said. “Can I come in?”

Monty wasn’t sure his voice would hold so he just opened the gate and let him in. He stayed quiet all the way to his room where he got back on his bed and just waited. Nathan followed him, but Monty couldn’t tell where he settled.

“So I heard you got sick.”

“I didn’t really. Just didn’t feel like going to school.”

“Ah.”

Nathan stopped talking then, but Monty didn’t want him to.

“What happened at the camp? You disappeared.”

“I wanted you to talk to Harper alone. So O and I went to find something to drink. I think we were at the beach for most of the night since at some point she wanted to go skinny dipping. But that wouldn’t have been a good idea.”

“Did you kiss her?” He had to ask. Nathan was telling him a story that no matter how it ended, would lead to one thing. He’d been drinking a lot but he remembered it all - it didn’t make sense and Nathan must’ve known it too. There had to be a confrontation of some sort coming up.

“No. I – She asked me if I wanted to, but I said no. So we just… talked. She’s a nice person, but I don’t like her that way.”

“Why not?” Monty’s heart was beating faster with each passing moment.

“Because there’s someone else I like. Who I’ve liked for a while now. And I… like them more than I’ve ever liked anyone.”

“Interesting.”

“It is”, Nathan chuckled, but it quickly turned into a heavy sigh. “Monty, what would you say if I told you I’d stolen something.”

“I’m sure you’re a great thief?”

“I was talking to Harper yesterday. She told me some things. I – I guess I should’ve realized some of them myself. Even Octavia tried to talk some sense into me. But I guess I should’ve come to you right away.”

He wasn’t sure he was breathing anymore. Suddenly, the bed dipped slightly as Nathan sat down. Monty folded his leg under himself so he could sit up straight. Nathan was right in front of him with the side of his thigh against his leg.

Nathan took his hands in his own and sighed again. “I just have to say this straight on. I really like you Monty. I freaked out when I kissed you because I thought you didn’t like me back and I would lose you as a friend. So I’m sorry. Your first kiss should’ve been better.”

Monty pulled his hands free. He let them move slowly, one up his arm, the other his chest, over his neck to Nathan’s face. He spent a moment just tracing his features, while Nathan breathed shakily. “You could, you know… try again if you want to. I won’t tell if you won’t.” He brushed his thumb over Nathan’s lower lip, feeling the boy gasp.

When he nodded, Monty didn’t waste any more time fitting their lips together. It was soft and chaste, Nathan’s hand finding his cheek and stroking his skin.

“I think I can do a little better”, Nathan mumbled when they’d pulled away, foreheads rested together, and it was Monty’s turn to nod frantically.

Nathan kissed him again, lips parting slightly to suck on his lower lip. Monty tugged on his shoulders to get him to lie down next to him. Nathan followed his lead, connecting their lips again the moment he was settled on his side.

He was panting lightly when he pulled away. “Might need to, uh, slow down a little bit. My body doesn’t know we’re not in a rush.”

Monty grinned, cheeks heating up. “Yeah, we can take care of that another time.”

Nathan groaned, and Monty laughed, pulling him into a hug. He tucked his face to the crook of his neck, breathing in deeply as Nathan’s fingers traced random patterns on his back.

—

“Do you think it went well?” Monty stopped to straighten the strap of his backpack before taking Nathan’s hand again. They’d just finished the presentation part of their project in front of the class.

“Yeah, at least it wasn’t any worse than everyone else’s”, Nathan squeezed his fingers.

“Where’s Harper? I thought she was going to walk with us.”

“I don’t see her. She disappeared right after class was over.”

From the sigh he let out, Monty could guess who they were approaching.

“I’m glad you’ve finally given up on chicks, Monty. They never seemed to like you anyway”, Finn called out.

“You and me have always had that in common”, Monty shrugged. He could hear Nathan chuckle under his breath.

They kept walking, hands swinging lightly between them. Nathan’s other hand came to his arm before they could reach the gates, telling him to wait.

“What is it?”

“I think… Is that – Holy… fuck. Okay let’s go. Come on. Let’s walk.”

Monty could hear distant shouting as they left the schoolyard. “What happened?”

“I saw Octavia and Harper. With Finn. Harper punched him in the face. Then they ran off together. We don’t want to be witnesses to that”, Nathan explained.

Monty’s mouth fell open. “Seriously?”

“Yup.”

“She’s going to be in so much trouble.”

“Well I didn’t see anything. Did you?”

Monty laughed, knocking their shoulders together.

——

He tugged on Harper’s hand for the fourth time. “You’re walking too slow.”

“Why are you in a rush? You saw the guy like four hours ago. You should be reluctant to let me go! I’m the one living a whole hour away now.”

“I need to tell him something”, Monty’s free hand curled around the folded piece of paper in the pocket of his - Nathan’s - hoodie. “And you visit like every three days.”

Harper ignored him. “See? This is why I’m glad I decided I don’t need a boyfriend. Otherwise that’d be me”, she huffed. “Octavia told me one of her exes used to text her once every hour. How creepy is that?”

Harper walked with him all the way to Nathan’s house. He was trying to hold a neutral expression so she wouldn’t get any ideas.

“Don’t forget to use protection!” she yelled after turning back to go home.

“Shut up!”

By then he’d gotten used to walking up to Nathan’s front door and stepping into the house. Getting to his room was still another thing since it was on the second floor. He hated those stairs.

“Hey, Monty!”

He was startled by the sound, but he recognized the voice as Nathan’s brother’s. “Hi, J.”

“Hold on”, J cleared his throat. “Nate! Your boyfriend’s here!”

Floorboards creaked as Nathan made his way downstairs. The sound neared and his hand found Monty’s, making him smile.

“Jesus, I forgot how adorable you are”, J made a disgusted noise. “I’ll be sleeping on the couch. Please don’t yell.”

“Come on”, Nathan guided him towards the stairs, setting his hand on the railing.

Monty waited patiently until they’d made it to his room and the door clicked shut behind them. Then he took a hold of Nathan’s shoulders and backed him against it.

“Hi”, Nathan chuckled.

Monty kissed him deeply, one hand on his neck and the other fisted in the front of his shirt. When he took a step back, he had to steady his breathing for a second. He folded open the note from his pocket and ran his fingers over the text like he didn’t already remember exactly what it said. “Hi, Monty. I love you. - Nathan”

“You did this.”

“On your old typewriter, yeah.”

“Without help?”

“All by myself. I’m still not very good at it, though. Miss Griffin wasn’t too happy with how long it took me. Apparently teacher’s don’t appreciate their students coming back for favors after graduation.”

“You do know that this is ridiculously romantic, right?”

“Isn’t that the point?”

Monty folded the note back and put it in his pocket. He took a step forward, and Nathan’s hands found his hips immediately. “Thank you”, he pecked him on the lips.

“There’s actually something else I have to tell you. I won’t write it down so it won’t take all day.”

“Hilarious. What is it?”

“I got a call from the real estate agent. We got the place.”

“The one 10 minutes away from your job?”

“Yes.”

“The one 15 minutes away from uni?”

“Shockingly yes, the same one.”

“Holy shit.”

“I know. We can go sign the papers tomorrow. Then we’ll be your everyday rent-paying citizens.”

“Holy shit.”

“You already said that.”

Monty grinned. “I love you.”

“Keep that in mind when I teach you how to ride a bike”, Nathan rubbed his hipbones with the pads of his thumbs under the waist of his jeans. “Wasn’t that the deal?”

“Really?”

“Mhm.”

“When do we start?”

Nathan pulled him against his body. “I’m not in a hurry.”

“Ah”, Monty chuckled. “More important matters to attend to first?”

“Something like that”, Nathan grinned against his lips.