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Nancy couldn’t help feeling nervous as she sat on the stairs, waiting for Steve to arrive. She was on good terms with him, in fact the two of them were still very close, with all romantic feelings long behind them now, but all the same, it felt a bit weird going to a party with her ex. It wasn’t just going to be the two of them, she reminded herself; there would be Robin too. Somehow that didn’t do much to ease her worries.
She could hear her brother’s voice from the corridor, talking animatedly about some nonsense on the phone. It was safe to assume it was Will on the other end, judging by the obvious joy in Mike's voice, and although she couldn’t see his face, she could picture the broad grin plastered on his face. His consistent rambling was giving her a headache, though, and given her current state of anxiety, it was pissing her off more than it should.
“Can you please shut up?” she snapped, holding her head in her hands. “You’re so loud, it’s annoying.”
Mike stopped talking, then shouted back, “I’m talking to my friend.”
“It’s annoying,” Nancy repeated, her temper rising immediately. “You’ve been talking to your friend for ages, surely there’s only so much you can say about whatever stupid game you like.” She made sure to add extra emphasis on the word friend, and she could almost feel the heat radiating off of Mike’s face.
At that moment, a car horn blared from outside, and she jumped up, clutching her bag.
“Ooooh, is Steve Harrington here?” Mike called. Faint giggles could be heard from the other end of the phone.
Nancy smiled at him sweetly, then shouted at the top of her voice, eyes glaring into her brother’s, “MOM, MIKE STOLE THE $20 BILL EARLIER, I SAW HIM TAKE IT.”
“Bullshit!” Mike protested at once, hatred in his eyes as he glared at Nancy. “Mom, she’s lying!”
“Have a good evening, little brother,” she waved innocently, smirking as she closed the door on Mike’s protests and their mother’s shouts.
“Took you long enough,” Robin said as Nancy climbed into the car. “What kept you?”
“Mike,” was all she said, and Robin laughed.
“What’d he do this time?” Steve said from the driver’s seat. He had heard many a rant about her brother while they were together.
Nancy rolled her eyes. “The usual. Annoyed the hell out of me.”
“I’m forever grateful I don’t have siblings,” Robin shuddered. “They sound like a nightmare.”
“So, you ready for your first party?” Nancy asked, and she made a face.
“I still don’t know how you two persuaded me to come,” she groaned.
“C’mon, it’ll be fun,” Steve said, in a tone that made him sound like a mother trying to persuade her kids that some family dinner would be fun. Nancy had noticed this dynamic between the two of them frequently- they often reminded her of a parent and child.
“I’m sorry, but spending my time with the intimidating prissy girls I try to avoid doesn’t sound fun.”
“What about Nancy? She’ll be there,” Steve pointed out, eyes fixed on the road.
Nancy glanced at Robin, their eyes meeting for a split second. She immediately looked away, staring out of the car window trying to hide the slight flush blooming on her face.
“Yeah, you’re not too bad, I suppose,” Robin said, nudging Nancy playfully. Nancy laughed, heart hammering in her chest. Just great. They hadn’t even reached the party yet, and Robin had already started having this weird effect on her, And Nancy didn’t like it at all.
Nancy hadn’t been to a party like this for a few years, and she’s completely forgotten how loud everything was. The music was blasting at top volume, making the walls vibrate and the floor shake. As a result of this, everyone had to shout to be heard, so she was surrounded by a wall of noise, everything going by in a blur. It was strange, but she actually found herself enjoying it; the volume of her surroundings made it hard to think, meaning she didn't have to worry about Robin.
The two of them were standing at the side of the room, trying to keep a distance from all the drunk, dancing couples, jumping around to some Christmas song playing. Steve was off somewhere getting them all drinks. Nancy was looking forward to getting wasted again, and completely blocking out her thoughts.
She glanced to her right, where Robin was standing beside her. Unlike Nancy, she did not seem to be loving the loud music. She looked extremely anxious, fiddling with her fingers. Nancy felt a little guilty for dragging her out with them tonight. It was obvious that house parties weren’t made for Robin.
“You okay?” Nancy shouted over the music.
Robin gave her a look. “Oh yeah, never better,” she said dryly, raising an eyebrow. Nancy rolled her eyes, smiling despite herself.
“Oh, hey, I think dingus is coming back to us,” Robin shouted, pointing at the crowd. Steve was fighting his way towards them, red plastic cups in hand.
“Ladies,” he said, passing them their drinks. Nancy took hers and immediately downed half the cup, closing her eyes as a warm, dizzy feeling took over her body. Robin watched her in half awe, half amusement.
“I never knew Nancy Wheeler had it in her,” she said, and Nancy gave a mock curtsey. She could already feel the alcohol's effect on her, making her more relaxed.
“Oh, you have no idea,” Steve laughed. Nancy smiled along, remembering the last time she got drunk and how it had led to her breakup with Steve.
She watched as Robin took a small sip of her own, gripping her cup with both hands. Maybe getting wasted wasn’t the best idea, on second thoughts; she needed to stay in control of what she was doing. It struck her how pretty Robin looked in the lighting of the house. Not that she didn’t always look pretty. But there was something about the way she looked in that exact moment, in her jeans and sweater, that made Nancy smile, blushing a little. Maybe it was the alcohol. Either way, she thought as she finished the rest of her cup, she needed to stay on top of how much she drank.
Steve left them after about an hour, some girl Nancy didn’t know pulling him by the arm into the crowd. Robin, who already seemed to be losing control of herself after one drink, hollered after him, teasing him as he left. Nancy, on the other hand, stood stricken as he disappeared. He had been her safety net for the night, the one who’d stop her embarrassing herself or doing something she regretted.
“I’m never going to shut up about her,” Robin said loudly to Nancy, her words slurring slightly. “What’s her name?”
Nancy smiled falsely, trying to keep a lid on her panic. “I don’t know, never seen her before.”
Robin thought for a moment. “She looks like a… I dunno, a Jessica. I’m gonna call her Jessica.”
“Yeah, sure.” Nancy was acutely aware of the limited space between the two of them. Robin had slowly edged closer to her, and, as she was right by a wall, Nancy couldn’t really move away. She could feel her heart hammering inside her chest with anxiety, adrenaline and something else she couldn’t quite name. This wasn’t going well at all. She was painfully hyper aware of everything she did, every movement she made, every breath she took. She was desperately trying to control herself, pleading silently for her cheeks to remain at a normal colour. Although, if she was blushing, maybe people would think she was just drunk.
“God, I wish they’d play some real music,” Robin complained, as Last Christmas began to play. “The same few songs are getting boring.”
“It’s a Christmas party, Robin, what were you expecting?” Nancy snapped, her temper rising all of a sudden. What was wrong with her today? First she’d attacked Mike for talking to his boyfriend, now she was going off on Robin.
“Alright, no need to get mad,” Robin said, apparently trying to mask the hurt in her voice with sarcastic amusement. “I’m just trying to make conversation, sweetheart.”
Sweetheart. God, why did Robin have to be so infuriating? Nancy rubbed her temple, taking deep breaths. Suddenly everything seemed too loud, too crowded, the walls closing in on her. Her head was spinning. She had hardly drank anything, but it seemed she couldn’t handle beer as much as she’d thought.
“I… I need some air,” she said, before darting between people in the crowd, ignoring Robin calling after her.
As soon as she reached the hallway, she was hit with a rush of cool air. Nancy was surprised to find herself exhausted, and she sank to the floor, resting her head in her hands. Deep breaths , she reminded herself, taking in as much of the coolness as she could. She already felt ten times better, the pounding in her head subsiding the more she breathed. She was okay. She could survive a few more hours, then get Steve to drive her and Robin home. A few more hours with Robin before it was all over, and she could go home. She could get through that, she was sure of it.
Almost as though Nancy had summoned her, a voice came from beside her.
“Hey,” Robin said, her tone unexpectedly soft. “You okay?”
“Yeah,” Nancy said, not looking up at her. “Loud, that’s all.”
Robin didn’t respond for a while, just stared at the wooden floor. Nancy could hear her heartbeat, and was instantly worried Roin could hear it too. That was ridiculous, she told herself, but still, she tried to will her heart to stop beating so loud.
“Hey, Nance?” Robin said, breaking the silence between them.
“Yeah?”
“Did I… Have I done something?”
Nancy finally met Robin’s gaze, startled by the pure anxiety in Robin’s wide eyes. What did she say to that?
“No,” she said, throat dry. “Why would you think that?”
Robin shrugged. “I dunno. You’ve been kinda ignoring me all day, y’know? And when you’re not ignoring me, you just seem sort of fake.”
Guilt bloomed inside her. Robin was half right, but it hurt to see someone Nancy cared about so much like this, especially knowing she was responsible for it.
“I- You didn’t do anything wrong-” Nancy began, but Robin continued in a rush.
“I’d want you to tell me if I did something wrong, really, so please don’t lie to spare my feelings, okay? I don’t want you to be upset with me, because I care a lot, and I just-”
She stopped talking, apparently cutting herself short like she was stopping herself saying something she’d regret.
“You just what?” Nancy said carefully, eyes still on Robin’s.
Robin opened her mouth, but failed to make words come out.
Fear bubbled up inside Nancy as she found herself slowly inching towards Robin. She had never done anything like this before, and if anyone found them, she wasn’t sure what would happen. But everything about Robin was making her heart race, and, although it was terrifying, nothing about what she was doing felt wrong. And, after all, if Mike had the nerve to do it, why shouldn’t she?
Kissing Robin in the hallway felt like putting the final piece in a jigsaw. Like everything finally made sense. All her fear melted away, replaced with a burning happiness that made her feel like she was about to start floating in the air. Robin’s hands were in her hair, and she had her arms draped over her shoulders, and neither one of them wanted to pull away. For a few moments, everything was perfect, and Nancy found herself happier than she had been in a very long time.