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I don't care if you never come home,
I don't mind if you just keep on
Rowing away on a distant sea,
'Cause I don't love you and you don't love me.
You cause a commotion when you come to town;
You give 'em a smile and they melt.
Having lovers and friends is all good and fine,
But I don't like yours and you don't like mine.
I don't care what you do at night,
Oh, and I don't care how you get your delights.
I'm gonna leave you alone, I'll just let it be,
I don't love you and you don't love me.
.oOOo.
It was Saturday night after one of the worst weeks Starsky ever had. Hutch had apologized for the Kira fiasco so many times that Starsky figured he wouldn't have to pay for pizza and beer for a whole year. Hutch had begged, cried and demanded to be forgiven. Hutch was a mess of emotions. He didn't know why and he didn't know how he could have hurt Starsky like that. Starsky listened and after a suitable amount of time forgave Hutch.
Starsky pulled open Huggy's door and stepped into the noise and controlled chaos of a Saturday night at the bar. He looked around seeking a face he knew wouldn't be there and shook his head.
Huggy spotted Starsky and waved him towards the bar. Starsky planted himself on a corner stool.
"Starsky! My Man! Saturday night and you are alone? What gives? Where's your better half?" Huggy smiled and motioned to the tap.
Starsky nodded acceptance of the offer of a cold brew.
"Hutch is off whale watching. Now he wants to add whales to list of things he tries to save. Thanks, Hug."
Starsky took a long sip of beer and licked his lips.
"Sounds like our White Knight. He didn't drag you along?"
"Hey! I got a life of my own! I don't care what Hutch does in his off time. We're partners. We're not married to each other!"
"Yeah. Right, right."
Huggy looked Starsky over. He could see something was bothering his friend and he thought he knew what.
"You two idiots over that two-faced whore that had you at each others throats?" Huggy wiped the counter and waited for a reaction.
There was none.
Then Starsky leaned in and said, "Hug, I gotta talk to somebody or I'm gonna explode."
"The Bear is in. And I'm all ears, Bro."
.oOOo.
I got a problem. Can you relate?
I got a partner calling love hate.
We made a vow we'd always be friends.
How could we know that promises end?
.oOOo.
"Hug, I convinced myself it wasn't happening. I couldn't have those kind of feelings for Hutch. I couldn't be in love with him. And Hutch has been so depressed and discouraged lately. He's burned out, Hug. We've been growing apart and it's killing him. I didn't think I was in love with Hutch. But I knew he was in love with me. I've known for a long time. He doesn't know. He doesn't know I know either. I wanted to get him to admit it to me. Ya get me, Huggy?"
Huggy frowned and reached for a shot glass. He poured some whiskey and belted it down.
"Starsky. I've known the two of you loved each other since the day you picked a fight with Big Foot and the Terrible Tornado. I watched you two kick their asses without sayin' a word to each other. I was like watching two dancers swirlin' around the floor in perfect time to the music. And when Hutch got thrown into the mirror and got all cut up, you sat there for an hour doctorin' him. Love. That was love, man."
Starsky smiled at the memory.
"World needs more love like that in it, Bro. You're in love with him, aren't you?"
Starsky nodded.
"I admit it now. I wish I admitted it before I started the whole Kira thing. Hutch is gonna kill me. I'm gonna lose my best friend, my partner, my everything."
Huggy pulled another beer from the tap and placed it in front of Starsky.
"You lost me." Huggy shook his head.
"I was never in love with Kira, Hug. I set the whole thing up. I'm a Detective! I knew what she was. I knew her rep. I used her to get Hutch to react. Wanted to see how much he loved me. I thought if he tried to break me and Kira up, it would make him face how he felt about me. I was thinkin' we could talk about his feelings maybe work something out. Only..."
"...Only you are a dumb bastard who manipulated our poor blond burnt marshmallow into a guilt trip to end all guilt trips. Starsky I talked to him. He was on the edge. If you had really dumped him I hate to think what he woulda done..." Huggy paused and poured another shot for himself. "Starsky you have made some dumb ass moves since I've known you, but this is the mother of all dumb ass, stupid, idiotic..."
"Shit! Huggy! Hutch is here. What the fuck should I do?"
"Pray to whoever listens to dumb fuckers like you. Have mercy! Here comes the sun."
Hutch walked in and all of the women and half the men turned to have a look. Hutch saw Starsky, waved and smiled. The day on the whale watching cruise had given his skin a golden glow and his windswept hair had sunny highlights even under the dim lighting of the bar. Add to that the fact that he was dressed in sandals, shorts and a blue t-shirt emblazoned with the logo "Save The Whales", it was no wonder that Starsky knocked over his beer.
Huggy snorted, cleaned the mess and pulled two more beers. He was going to enjoy this part.
.oOOo.
I tried to love you for years upon years,
You refuse to take me for real.
It's time you saw what I want you to see,
And I'd still love you if you'd just love me.
I got a problem. Can you relate?
I got a partner calling love hate.
We made a vow we'd always be friends.
How could we know that promises end?
.oOOo.
"Hey! Hutch!" Starsky rose, grabbed his beer and turned towards their booth.
"Hey, yourself." said Hutch.
Hutch smiled at Huggy and sipped from his glass. The foam stuck to his mustache and he licked it off with an, "Awwww!"
Starsky's eye lingered on Hutch's mouth. Huggy looked at Starsky and stifled a laugh.
"Thanks, Huggy! I sure needed that." said Hutch.
"No problemo. Seen any whales today?" Huggy nodded at Hutch's t-shirt.
"Oooooo, Guys! I wish you both were there. It was wonderful." Hutch absently put a hand on Starsky's shoulder and smiled at him.
Starsky felt a tingle where he touched that traveled through him like an electric shock and made him weak in the knees.
Hutch continued his tale.
"Three whales. Three Humpbacked whales. A mother and two babies. The mother was so majestic. I felt like a... I don't know... like an insignificant drop in the ocean. But part of the whole. It was mind blowing."
"...mind... blowing... wow." said Starsky quietly.
Huggy couldn't help a giggle that escaped. He changed it quickly to a cough. Hutch didn't notice and pulled Starsky gently into their booth.
Starsky took another sip of beer and cleared his throat.
"Hutch, I'm glad you stopped in. I have something I want to say to you."
Hutch looked like a deflated beach ball. All the cheery sunshine was snuffed out instantaneously at Starsky's words.
Starsky felt like he just ran over a kitten. It gave him courage. He had to stop the suffering. He decided to just say it.
"Baby, I'm in love with you. Have been for a long time only I didn't admit it to myself till Kira. Kira wasn't your fault, Hutch. It was my stupid idea to get you to open up about how you felt about me. I never loved her. Never. I think I've only really loved you all this time..."
Starsky stopped talking. Hutch had shut his eyes and was deathly still. Starsky could not read him and it scared him.
"Hutch, I'm so sorry. I'm a fuckin' moron. I messed up everything, haven't I? I'll just go..."
Starsky moved and Hutch grabbed his arm tightly. Hutch opened his eyes.
"No." said Hutch.
"No. No what. Don't go no? Stay?"
"Yes."
Hutch's voice was deep and full of emotion. Starsky wanted to help him.
"Do you understand I love you, Baby? Do you understand I mean in all the ways I could love ya, I love ya?"
Hutch coughed. "Yes."
"Do... Do ya think ya can forgive me, Hutch?"
Hutch closed his eyes again and held on to Starsky's arm even tighter.
"Yes."
Hutch relaxed his grip on Starsky's arm.
"Baby, I know we promised we'd always be best friends. But sometimes promises end. Do you think you could love me just like I love you?"
Hutch opened his eyes and placed a hand on Starsky's cheek. Hutch looked deep into Starsky's eyes.
"Oh, yes." said Hutch and he smiled.
Starsky felt like a new day had dawned and he was looking into his future. It was bright, golden and full of sunshine. He smiled back.
"Want I should get ya a pet whale for a weddin' present?"
Hutch & Starsky giggled uncontrollably and managed to hold hands under the table.
Huggy smiled and went into the back room for a bottle of bubbly. He felt like celebrating love.
.oOOo.
We made a vow we'd always be friends.
How could we know that promises end?
.oOOo.