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The gardens of the royal palace were truly a beautiful place, one of the best Princess Katsuki had ever seen.
Emerald green grass, shiny with the last droplets of that evening's rain; a multitude of plants and flowers of any kind, colorful and bright, full with pollen and nectar whose perfume was so fragrant and rich that she could smell it from her own balcony, a hundred or more feet above. A wonderful, lucious corner of peace and quiet, bathed in the pearly light of the moon, away from the constant frenzy of the castle's walls.
She was walking slowly, letting her hands, so small yet littered with healing cuts and old scars, so improper and unpolished, reach out and touch delicate petals and leaves, her shoeless feet padding softly through cool and wet grass.
A tired sigh passed her lips, which were pink and soft as the petals of the roses around her, thanks to the sweet balms her newly hired personal maid applied on them before leaving her for the night.
She never had lips so plump and soft before.
Because she, the Princess of the Wilds, was not soft . Never has been, never thought she could, even.
She was a warrior, the best one out of all the youngest of her kingdom, second only to the Queen, her own mother.
She was meant for hard skin and warm furs, for a castle made out of dark stones and wood, surrounded by the smell of leaves and dirt and not for flowy dresses, white marbles and delicate flowers.
She wasn't, and yet, there she was.
Clad in a much too tight nightgown that left nothing to the imagination in a way she was not comfortable with, a sheer cloth with a skirt so long she could hardly see the point of her toes, in a beautiful, delicate garden in the middle of the night.
She should've been in the royal quarters, warming her husband's bed, but the thought alone made her shiver.
She hated it. Hated what her life had become, hated that way too soft, too big bed with not enough blankets and too many cushions. She wished for her own bed, scented with incense and pines, with the smell of home .
The home she was so, so far away from.
Never in a million moons Katsuki would’ve thought she would feel the loss of her land as much as she was, but she did, she missed it as a parent would miss their child; she missed her mountains, her woods, the snow that surely was already falling at that time of the year. It snowed a lot, in the Wilds, not at all at the Crimson Bay. She missed that too.
And despite their beauty, and the calm they filled her with, the castle’s gardens were nothing compared to the forest surrounding her own; their beauty was one she was not familiar with. It was still, as if frozen in time, with almost no sounds to be heard. There was no actual life in them. No fireflies to light the path, no river to accompany the silence of the night, nothing at all. Just an immense amount of colorful flowers and exotic plants, all meant as a distraction from the hard truth: that place was a lifeless cage, a beautiful one, but a cage nonetheless.
And she was the one that locked herself in it and threw away the key.
All because of a single night, almost a year ago, a fleeting moment that felt like a dream, still did; a dream made of masquerades in far away kingdoms, fancy dresses and feathery masks, of distant music and secret smiles, a single, secret kiss shared in a maze, under a moon not unlike the one shining upon her right that moment.
She dreamed of that kiss every night. Every night she’d woke up with the phantom touch of lips on hers, of delicate hands on her waist; of red lips, red eyes almost hidden behind black satin. And every night, she thought she'd do anything to just live that moment again, even one last time.
She would’ve thrown everything she has known away, her life, her pride. She did .
And look where that brought you , she angrily thought, glaring at her reflection in the calm water of the fountain. What she saw made her purse her lips and click her tongue.
That was not her.
That woman, with red colored cheeks and lips, hair combed in a tight hairstyle so uncomfortable to sleep in, was not Katsuki Bakugou, heir of the most powerful, dangerous kingdom of the continent.
That was a damn fool if she ever saw one. And she had. It's just that, at that moment, she was the biggest of them all.
She wanted to tear that stranger apart.
She forcefully freed her hair from the tight ribbons, locks of molten gold coming loose on her thinly clothed back; then she immersed her hands in the fountain, the cold water sending chills down her spine, and splashed her face with it, washing away as much as the sticky moisture and balm as she could.
In the rippling water, she finally felt a little bit more like herself, hair a mess, scowl in place; if she concentrated enough, she could almost ignore her sunken eyes and tanned skin. The sun was never that bright where she was from, so her skin used to be as pale as a pearl. Now, not so much anymore.
Her scowl deepened.
"This is stupid." she murmured to herself, while still sitting on the edge of the fountain.
She was stupid.
Her head felt heavy, the nights spent avoiding her newly wed husband catching up all at once; she was tired, tired of running away and living in a place that felt wrong and so damn angry .
At herself for following not her mind but her heart.
At her parents for letting her go without so much of a fight.
At this place, at his husband, but especially-
A gasp sounded behind her, making her snap her head up. She did not notice the sound footsteps getting closer, not even their sudden stop.
"Lady Katsuki…?" a voice asked, quiet as the fluttering of a bird’s wings and, she turned around and froze .
She froze, but her chest burned .
Tall and lean, yet soft and delicate. A nice, dark dress wrapped around her sinuous body, covered by a thick red nightgown; a thin, gold necklace was hanging from her long neck, which was connected to the most beautiful, dangerous face Katsuki has ever laid eyes on.
And then, there was red. Bright, shiny red.
In her hair, gathered in a loose braid; on her cheeks for reasons Katsuki wasn't ready to fathom; in her eyes, deep as the petals of the roses surrounding them.
Princess Eijiro was as gorgeous as the first day she saw her, in the mazes of the Todoroki estate.
Silence fell on them, thick as honey but not as sweet. It was awkward almost, tense as the chord of an off-tune violin.
One year.
They had not seen each other for a whole year before meeting again, the day Katsuki's future was sealed, the day of her wedding, when the I do she spoke sounded more like a sentence than a promise.
Marrying Prince Rappa has been the worst choice she could’ve ever made, she knew that, but she didn't care. She didn't because finally, finally, she thought, she could be with Eijiro again, after all that time only dreaming about it.
But.
Eijiro did not look at her. Not even once.
For the whole ceremony, Katsuki hoped to meet her eyes, even for just a second, but every time she tried, Eijiro was already looking elsewhere or immediately averted her gaze.
For a few times, though, Katsuki could swear she saw her looking at her; just a few glances, void of any emotion.
She didn't like that.
She hoped to talk to her that night, to explain, to ask her if she felt that too, that pull, that longing, that burning .
But, Eijiro was avoiding her.
She gazed at her, red eyes piercing her skin, watched her as she danced with Prince Rappa, her husband, Eijiro's brother, with an expression so blue it was almost dark.
But not once did she talk to her, or stopped when Katsuki asked her to. Again, and again, and again once more.
A week passed, then two. Then a month.
Now they met each other again, almost six months of complete silence between them, weighing like a pile of boulders.
“What are you doing here? It’s the middle of the night.” the princess asked with a distant tone, as what she was asking was nothing but a mere pleasantry.
It was so cold, so detached .
It made her feel so stupid, so angry ; it came down like a river about to flood, the anger she kept to herself all that time, it grew so much and so fast.
"Ah, she speaks, at last." Katsuki spat, venomous as a snake, making the other cringe slightly. She felt bad. Good. "I almost forgot the sound of your voice, Princess ."
The redhead bit her lip, that plush, sinful lip and averted her gaze , not looking at her once again, and taking a small, almost invisible step back.
Trying to run away .
And Katsuki, Katsuki couldn't do it anymore.
She was just so tired . Of everything.
She jumped up, body trembling from the ocean of emotions swirling inside of her.
"You won’t even look me in the face." she hissed, fists clenching at her sides.
She had to stay calm, or at least try to, but the more she looked at her, the less she felt she could or even wanted to.
The other flinched, eyes still casted downturn. “What do you mean?” she asked, posture tight and tall, hands holding each other on the front of her dress.
So, she wanted to play dumb. Katsuki scoffed. So be it, but two could play that game.
“What do I mean, I wonder.” she hummed mockingly, tauntingly. ”So, you haven’t been avoiding me since the moment I’ve set foot into this place, right? Running away any time you see me, like a scared mouse .”
Take seemed to take a rise out of Eijiro who finally, finally looked up; eyes hardened by an emotion Katsuki couldn’t, for the love of all the gods above, point nor recognize. It wasn’t quite hate, not really, It was duller, thicker, harder to contain if the faint twitch of her lips was anything to go by.
“You’re being delusional, I have duties to accomplish and studies to pursue. My life is quite busy so I don’t have time for useless distractions, and I suppose yours is too, now. After all, my brother could be quite the strenuous lover, sister-in-law .”
Katsuki recoiled at the harsh tone, the venom on the last word she used.
That was a low blow, a hurtful one.
Was Katsuki really just a useless distraction? Why was she being like that? The first conversation they have in months and it’s filled with ice and hurt. Didn’t she know? Didn’t she understand that she was everything Katsuki wanted? Was it really all in her head?
Suddenly, all that until that moment felt like a dream started looking more and more like a nightmare.
“Is that really what you think of me?” she whispered her question, fearing that if she spoke with her voice raised she would start breaking again. “Am I just that to you? A distraction? Your sister-in-law? ”
For a moment, Eijiro did not say anything. She was looking at her only now Katsuki wished she wasn’t, for her gaze resembled one of nothing .
The, she asked.
“Are you supposed to be more?”
That was the last straw.
“You.” she growled. “You damn bastard .”
She exploded. She was crying, bawling even. She knew she was, could feel the tears streaming down her cheeks, her breath coming in short; she must've looked like a mess, she felt like it.
All the frustrations, the anger, the longing, the sadness, the love, the hate came forward like a broken dam; she launched herself on Eijiro, digging her nails in her clothes arms, snarling in her face.
“So was it all a lie?! Everything you said to me that night, was nothing true?!”
Taken by surprise, Eijiro almost fell backwards, catching them before they could crash on the hard marbled ground.
“Quiet, lower your voice-!”
“I will yell as much as I want! Stop stalling and answer me, you coward!”
“Princess Katsuki-”
“DON'T CALL ME THAT!” she yelled, unaware of the wide-eyes, worried look Eijiro was casting her. She must've looked franctic. She didn’t really care though.
“Don’t. I do not deserve to be mocked like that! You don’t get to hold me , kiss me like a starving dog, only to flee right after and act like nothing happened the moment we see each other again! Because it did, it happened and yet you act like to you I am nothing!”
Her screams echoed in the otherwise silent garden, filled with a desperation that made everything stilled. Even Eijiro, who stopped struggling and just stayed there, unmoving like a statue, hands hovering in the air.
Katsuki was shaking, silently pouring the shards of her breaking heart out.
She sniffed, slowly, hesitantly bumping her head on the other’s shoulder.
“Why did you kiss me that night?” she asked, ignoring Eijiro’s sudden intake of breath. “Was it really a dream?”
It couldn’t be. She knew it wasn’t, she knew what she felt that night, what she saw and heard. She knew that Eijiro was lying, for some reason, she just couldn’t understand why .
With the tears and sorrow blinding her sight, she could only feel Eijiro biting her lips, her posture faltering under the pressure of whatever thoughts were crossing her mind.
When she spoke, it was with a voice so small and scared, Katsuki’s heart clenched.
“It… wasn’t.” then, with more clarity. “It wasn’t. It wasn’t a dream because… if it was, then I would’ve been dreaming too.”
She took a hold of her hands, still painfully piercing her skin, and brought them down, fingers lightly touching.
Then she said, with security, shaking.
"I wanted you from the first moment I saw you."
Katsuki gasped softly, a disbelieving, choked sound, and slowly raised her head.
And Oh , she thought, there it is. The dream from so long ago .
Eijiro was looking at her. For real, this time, no badly crafted mask on sight.
And oh, how much that look made her ache, brought her back to that time.
The Crimson’s Princess eyes were filled with so much , she couldn’t even begin to describe them; bright with fondness, sharp with guilt. Overflowing with want . She was beautiful.
“That night, I wasn't even supposed to be there, but my parents insisted. Said it would be good for our name.” her voice was soft, reminiscing “So I went, but I was dreading the hours that separated me from the last song of the night. I smiled, and talked to the lords and ladies that approached me, but the only thing I wanted was to go home…”
“ Until I saw you .”
Her words were getting stronger by the second, her hold tighter.
“You were talking to my brother, wearing the most bored expression I have ever seen, I had to force myself and contain my laughter. It was just… too funny.” she chuckled. “My brother is an idiot, so he didn’t notice and just kept talking, and talking and… then, you noticed me staring.”
“You looked directly at me and… Katsuki, you have to understand. I had never seen anything more beautiful in my entire life. You were glowing , with your white furs and golden hair. And your eyes … Gods. You were breathtaking, the brightest jewel I’ve ever seen.”
Katsuki blinked, shedding the remaining tears away, cheeks flushing a fierce red; Eijiro noticed, of course she did, and smirked at her sweetly.
“Don’t look so surprised, precious.” she chuckled, shaking her head, her red braid swishing behind her back. “You were so gorgeous, my mind went completely blank. The moment your eyes met mine I knew I had to take you away from there. So I waited and the moment I caught you alone, I…”
She didn’t have to say anything else, because Katsuki knew; she remembered that moment, that whole night, so vividly .
Eijiro appeared from thin air, took her hand and pulled her out of the too stuffy ballroom into the dimly lit garden.
“Come!” she said, laughter in her eyes, “Let’s get away from here!”
Katsuki did nothing to prevent it, letting herself be dragged away by that beautiful stranger, dressed in a silky dark dress with sheer puff sleeves and a flowing skirt that made her look like a crow, yet her chuckles sounded like a nightingale.
They made their way to and through the maze, laughing, talking, sharing glances and hidden smiles, then…
Katsuki sniffed, her most cherished memory blown away by cold shoulders and hard looks.
"Then, why…?"
Eijiro sighed, her hands finally, finally landing on her hips, squeezing soflty. Tentatively. Katsuki’s heart hiccuped.
"What was I supposed to do? We had to part, I had not seen you for months and then you appear at my doorsteps to marry my brother , the same one you seemed to dislike . I felt foolish. And hurt.”
Her eyes got misty and Katsuki’s breath hitched. She couldn’t have that.
"I never wanted to marry him!" she said immediately, surely.
A beat, another.
"Then why did you?"
"Because that was the only way I could stay with you! The only reason I accepted his hand in marriage was because doing so I could finally meet you again and be with you!” she heard Eijiro gasp softly, disbelieving, but she couldn't stop her words even if she tried.
“You were all I could think of. Morning, noon, night, I never stopped. It was maddening, not even the hunts with my parents could take my mind off you. Almost took an arrow to the side because of that, I wasn't even being careful.” she couldn’t stop a wet, empty chuckle from leaving her parted lips at the memory, then shook her head.
“My mother and father would’ve never let me come without a solid and unavoidable reason to, I was desperate , so when we received your brother’s request I took it without thinking twice.”
“I know it has been foolish of me, I didn't think this through, I understand now. I never wanted to hurt you. I just needed to see you."
Her hand snaked up and up, until her rough palm cupped Eijiro’s cheek, red eyes following the movement with rapt attention, lips softly parted.
“Please. Please , trust me.” she begged, and she never, ever begged in her life. She was going against anything she knew and was all over again. She seemed to do that quite a lot when her princess was involved and she couldn’t say she hated it, excactly.
She would do anything for her, after all.
Eijiro stayed quiet for a few ticks, staring her down with something akin to hope in her deep, pretty eyes.
“Is it true?” she asked quietly, her hand getting on top of Katsuki’s on her cheek.
Katsuki sniffed, nodding slowly. “I never say things I don’t mean.” then, with a much softer voice she thought herself capable of. “You’re everything I’ve ever wanted, Eijiro, all that I’ll ever want.”
It all happened in the blink of an eye.
In a moment she found herself trapped in the other arms, a hand taking her chin between nimble fingers, making her tilt her head up.
Then everything fell into place.
Finally, after a year full of yearning, sleepless nights and desperate cries, their lips met again, softly at first, almost afraid; but then the redhead’s sharp teeth grazed her bottom lip, Katsuki mewled softly and something in Eijiro snapped .
She growled in their kiss, bringing their bodies so much closer, a hand burying itself in golden locks, the other clawing at Katsuki’s rear; their tongues dancing with each other in a sinful dance, made of lost time and hopefully a new beginning.
Katsuki was so happy she could die; tears sprouted again from her eyes but this time she was not the only one.
They parted and Ei was there, crying her heart out as well.
“Katsuki…” she murmured, leaving wet kisses all over her face, as in a daze. “Katsuki, my gem, my everything. I’m so, so happy but… but I am also so sorry. “
Sorry? Katsuki thought, gently caressing the other’s neck, basking in the attention. “What for?”
Eijiro sighed,
“I… I stole your fate, that night. We fell in love and while I was acting like a coward, you married a man you don’t even love only to stay by my side. I feel like I’m the only, truly lucky one here…”
Katsuki thought she should’ve said something about that; because it was wrong, so, so wrong for her precious to think like that, since it was her the luckiest fool in the whole country.
Yet, her mind decided to concentrate on just one single thing.
“You fell in love? With me?” she asked, voice merely a whisper.
“I… yes . Didn’t you-”
“Did you?” the blonde interrupted her, eyes wide, cheeks pink.
After a mere second of hesitation, Eijiro smiled, a fond, dreamy smile.
“Katsuki… I don’t only love you.” she whispered, not even a breath away from her lips. “I burn for you.”
Katsuki’s breath got tangled in her chest at that. So, she felt that too. That deep rooted, scary, burning longing she was feeling.
“You burn for me.” she repeated, heart pounding in her ears.
The other nodded, gently bumping their foreheads togheter.
“I burn for you.”
Then…
“Then everything’s gonna be okay.” somehow , she added in the privacy of her own thoughts but did not vocalize it, not after Eiijiro’s face bloomed into the most perfect smile she had ever seen.
There were so many things to think about; her duties as a wife, the fact that Eijiro will, someday, be married to some no-name noble living on the other end of the walking land; the mere thought made her sick on her stomach.
Surely Eijiro knew those things too, if the way she was still holding her meant something, but in that moment, sharing sweet nothings with her love, nothing of that mattered.
They were alone in a beautiful garden bathed in moonlight, that smelled too sweet and not at all of old wood and pines, with no sounds except for the water falling from the fountain, no fireflies or snow.
But, for the very first time, it started to feel a little bit like home.
A different one, softer, warmer; and much, much redder.
Red eyes gazed at her lovingly, red hair falling off a loose braid caressed her cheeks.
"I am yours, Katsuki. I'll always be."
Eijiro whispered on her kiss swollen, red lips, like a secret, like an oath, and Katsuki, for the first time in what felt like a lifetime, smiled.
"And I, yours."
And that, that really sounded like the strongest of the promises.