Chapter Text
Awareness.
That’s what was registered first in its burgeoning mind. It was aware of its surroundings.
It was aware of being encapsulated within something, something hard but brittle. Something it could - it wanted to - push through with minimal effort. So it did.
Outside now. Cool air. Stifling but enjoyable. And… dark. Very very dark.
Somehow it could see. It didn’t know if it was supposed to, but it could. It could see other strange black orbs… like the one it crawled free of. It felt… weak. None of the other orbs had opened like its had. Was it early? Was it wrong somehow, because of that? It didn’t think it was ready. … That gave it pause. Ready for what? What was it too weak to do? Its thin shell shudders as the minimal void weakly rouses within.
Why did it feel like this? It was alone with its thoughts. Thoughts it felt it should not have. Feelings it felt it should not feel.
But why? Why did it feel? Why did it think? Why was it alone ?
… It very quickly learned it did not like the solitude afforded to it, as its thoughts spiraled away from its control.
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It was alone for a long while. It had no way to tell time, but it knew the loneliness grew stronger and its thoughts grew tougher to control for a significant amount of it before the first cracks appeared outside one of the other eggs.
They had figured that out, after a while. Many words were used for the spheres at first. Egg felt right. Strange black eggs, finally hatching more creatures that appeared like them, with differing patterns of horns; some intricate and beautiful, some extravagant and attention-demanding, and yet others’ simplistic but light. Many of the eggs hatched around the same time. Only one egg produced two of the creatures. Two with similar horns, of the same size, emerged from the same egg, holding hands. Twins, its blossoming mind supplied. They are twins.
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The darkness was much more active now, the shadows swirling in a dance of sorts. All the beings, the self-named Siblings, could sense something above, approaching but not yet arrived. It felt strong, but cold and uncaring. It was powerful, it had to be. It was-
BRIGHT!
Every Sibling groans in a wave of silence as a bright light bursts from above, filling their minds with words, thoughts not their own, and a mantra, powerful and clear. It is the first to move, to start ascending towards the light. It ignores the words flowing through its mind like water, pooling in the emptiest points until it flips the space of its mind and shakes them out.
It does not follow the light out of any sense of duty. It follows out of fear.
Fear of loneliness, fear of being left, fear of, at this point in its rapid ascent, falling to be shattered far, far below.
It makes it nearly all the way to the top, almost to the shining platform, when it just barely miscalculates its landing, its foot hooking on the edge of a platform and swinging it into the rock with a not insignificant amount of force. There’s a sickening crack, and fresh pain blooms through its shell. It lifts itself onto hands and knees, staring blearily through swimming eyes and pounding head at the black fluid dripping to the ground.
It… was leaking? It was leaking. Did it leak black before? No, it didn’t. Is that why everything hurts? Is the black meant to stay inside? It must have been, right? Its head is in agony, vision darkening with every shift of its body, but it couldn’t give in now. It staggered upright, and winced as a Sibling jumped past it, pulling ahead. One of the egg-pair…? Why was the Sibling moving so fast?
No, no time for questions. It must climb. And yet, it can barely make the first jump, the impact of landing steady on its feet like it has before leaving its head splitting, its breaths heaving, its body haggard. Another’s hand grips its own, but it doesn’t have the strength to keep holding. The second egg-paired Sibling stares at them for a moment, transmitting worry it can barely register, before glancing off and jumping away. Likely chasing its paired Sibling, already so far above.
It doesn’t particularly care anymore. It’s tired. It’s so, so tired. It can’t stay awake any longer, but it must. It must . If it doesn’t, it… will there be anything left? Will it ever open its eyes again if it rests now?
It starts to lose consciousness, despite its primal urge to live, to wake, to move, to fight. It begins to drift away, only barely noticing that it’s been encased in an odd, blue light. This one is not like that of the pale light it was chasing; it is gentle, dim, cool. It evokes no anxiety in its mind, and if anything, seems to be alleviating its pain.
But it just can’t hold on any longer. It must sleep now, it simply can’t keep conscious for another minute. Maybe it will wake… maybe it won’t. It does not have the energy to care, not anymore.
Let it rest.
Let it fade away.
Let it rejoin the whole.
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There are many things it had expected. Very few of them were holding up. It expected the egg-pair to be inseparable. That was swiftly proven false. It expected the bright, pale light, the first it had ever seen, to be welcoming, but it induced no comfort, only a cold anxiety. It had expected the crack in its shell to be its death. It had even accepted this, at the perceived end, terrified though it had been.
Yet, it was proven wrong once more, awakening with a jolt in a cocoon of strange blue vines. It could feel that its shell was still leaking, the crack still dripping, but when it looked to a drop that splashed to the hard rock underfoot, it saw that the color was… wrong, for Void.
Void was deep, unfathomable black, and it seemed no light could escape it. It was certainly not a bright, vibrant blue. And another oddity; what is…? An odd weight has settled onto the front-ruff of its cloak. A weight that, in its curiosity, caused it to reach for the foreign object on its ruff. Cold metal meets its not-quite-grub-soft fingers, but there’s an odd warmth to the center of the object, the slight heat almost… comforting? Comforting was the word, was it not? How could words be so simple, for such complicated feelings? There is no way to capture the way something primal deep down within it is soothed by the indescribable, cool-warm-soft gel-like substance… no words for the way its tense shoulders relax imperceptibly as their weakened body is supplemented with what can only be described as an extra, notably tougher layer of false chitin.
Something in its mind tried to supplement words anyways, ones it could hardly understand. Joy, relaxation, bliss.
Acceptance.
None manage to match or even approach the feeling flowing through its shell.
It was not made to feel. The Pale Light it was so afraid of failing to reach made that as obvious as possible. It was designed without a voice, without a mind, without a will. It had all these things anyways, even somewhat of a voice, in spite of its creator. Possibly to spite its creator. Its mind was sharper than it should be, its will was stronger than ever, and its voice, while only audible by Voidborne creatures, was functioning just fine. All this, despite…
It shook its head. It was getting lost in its own musings. Brushing off the thoughts that would do it no good, it stands and wanders to the edge of the cliff it resides on, peering down, and then up. It then has to steady itself; perhaps a shaken head and quick stand was a poor combination.
The Void was as endlessly dark as ever, it seemed… although the floor appeared to be higher, for some reason, the previously-dark stone now a light ivory. The Pale Light had vanished from the shining overhang, as well, which despite the anxiety it evoked, left it feeling like its Shade might erupt from its shell at any moment, despite it having no damage aside from the single crack in its shell. Its head did not even hurt anymore, yet its void roiled and shuddered beneath its shell.
Shrugging off the strange occurrence of its survival with an admittedly somewhat discomforting ease, it resumes its ascent, the odd blue cocoon it emerged from being notably further down than it had previously climbed. It had some distance to make up.
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