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Sam can't stop thinking about what he and Alex did at the spa. What they did in the spa, obviously: How good it felt, how badly he wants to do it again. He can't stop thinking about what they did before getting in the spa, though, too. He liked working out with him. He liked that Alex shared that part of his life with him, that Alex didn't tease him because of his limited exercising knowledge. Alex was focused while he exercised, but would give Sam pointers in-between sets, or offer up teases of gossip he gets from Haley.
So far, their hangouts had been in neutral territory, like the lake or the train tracks, or at Sam's house with Vincent present. Apart from that night that kicked all this off, when Alex brought Sam back to his kitchen to get cleaned up, they hadn't spent any time at Alex's house. Sam knows part of that is that Alex's grandparents are usually around, but Sam had also began to wonder if Alex just didn't want Sam to see more of his life. Sam could understand that, had gotten glimpses of why Alex was guarded, and didn't fault him for that. The thing was, was that Sam wanted Alex to feel like he could let his guard down around him, even more than he already had. He just had to work up the courage to tell him that.
Sam feels weird drinking around Alex. He doesn't know if it actually bothers Alex, but it feels like an uncomfortable question to ask so he just hasn't. He's already going to ask one uncomfortable question tonight, he's not up for adding another one to the list. He still feels like he needs a few drinks in him to ask, though. So, he's at the saloon working on his second drink with Sebastian and Abby and losing at pool because he apparently can't stop thinking about Alex.
"You know, you're never very good at pool but you're usually not this bad," Sebastian tells him as Sam fails to sink the 12-ball.
"Yeah, what's up?" Abby chimes in, hoisting herself up to sit on the side of the table, effectively pausing the game, and faux-innocently ignoring the warning frown Gus sends her way.
"Nothing is up!" Sam tells them, his tone too defensive and high-pitched to be believable. His friends give him matching flat looks. "What would be up?"
"I don't know. Probably something with Alex," Abby says bluntly. Sam feels his eyebrows raise and tries to stop his cheeks from flushing. "He's come by practice two more times now, and we both see how you've been looking at each other."
"How do we look at each other?" Sam asks. He means to come off skeptical. Instead, he just sounds genuinely interested, because, well, he is.
"Like you forget that Abs and I are there, like, half the time," Sebastian cuts in. "I don't know what's going on with you two, if anything, but if nothing is going on you both clearly want there to be." Sebastian is giving him a look that is unreadable, or maybe Sam is just trying to read something into it, based off their own history. This is a good sign, though, maybe? That both Sebastian and Abigail were seeing something. Maybe it means there is something to be seen?
Sam lets his head drop back with a groan, and so he doesn't have to look at either of them when he admits: "there's something going on." Abigail lets out a "ha!" and Sebastian makes an "mm-hmm" noise. When he looks up, though, both of them are looking at him with soft smiles; well, Sebastian's smile is more of a smirk, but still.
"Sooo," Abigail prompts as she leans forward to rest her elbows on her knees and her chin in her hands. "What's going on?"
Sam plops himself into a chair. The game of pool is apparently over. "I think I like him?" Sam doesn't know why he phrases that like it's a question because it's not. Sam likes Alex, he knows this.
"Yeah, but do you like like him?" Abigail goads.
Sam sighs. "I'm not twelve, Abby," he tells her, but she continues to look at him expectantly. Sam shoots Sebastian a look in an attempt to get him to call her off, but Sebastian holds his gaze as he shrugs his shoulders and drinks his beer. Sam breaks the stare first, looking back at Abigail and says, "Yes, I like like him."
Abigail's face lights up and Sam even sees Sebastian's eyebrows raise. "Okay. Then why are you acting like that's a bad thing?"
Sam is still trying to find the words to answer when Sebastian makes a nod of understanding and steals them right out of his mouth: "Because he isn't sure if Alex likes him back."
"So ask him!" Abigal says, like it's the obvious answer.
It is the obvious answer, Sam knows this, too. He groans and slumps further down in his chair. "Easier said than done, Abby."
Sebastian finally takes pity on him and drops down in the chair next to him. "Listen: Alex looks at you just like you look at him. You two aren't exactly subtle." Sam can't help the hopeful smile that starts to grow on his face and Sebastian rolls his eyes but still smiles back at him. "I'm guessing you've been hanging out with him a lot, since we don't see you in here as much -" Sam starts to attempt to apologize for that, but Sebastian holds up a hand to cut him off. "And that's okay, dude, honest. We're happy for you if you're happy. Just go talk to him and sort your shit out so we can confirm that you're happy. 'Cause this whole pining and longing glances thing is distracting you at practice and its annoying."
That last bit feels more like a dig just so Sebastian doesn't feel like he's being too big of a softie, but Sam also knows he's right about practicing. He has been getting distracted trying to subtly look at Alex (and failing, apparently) or thinking about if Alex likes him back. He needs to just find out one way or the other. He'll at least hopefully get some new inspiration for lyrics, either way.
"Okay," Sam says, sitting up straight in his chair. "Okay," he says again, as he pushes off his knees and into standing. "Okay!" He says for the third and final time as he takes the last gulp of his beer. "I'll see you guys later?" he asks and they both nod. Abigail makes a little shooing motion with her hands and Sebastian raises his own mug in Sam's direction. Sam takes a deep breath and walks out of the bar.
Sam makes his way to the back side of Alex's house and knocks on his window. Alex is laying in bed reading a book and he visibly startles at the noise, which Sam feels a little bad about. Alex turns around to look at him and he makes a surprised, yet pleased, face. He rolls himself off the bed and opens the window. "What are you doing here?"
"Want to sneak out for a bit?" Sam asks, rocking a bit on his heels.
"Yeah, okay, just gimme one second," Alex says after a quick look back towards his closed bedroom door. He tugs on his jacket and shoes and clambers out the window, holding onto Sam to steady himself. He gives Sam a quick peck on the corner of his mouth and Sam is grateful that it's dark enough to hide his blush. "Where we going?"
Shit. Sam didn't think this far ahead. "Um. The dock?" This answer apparently satisfies Alex, who happily follows him south. They're quiet as they walk, partially in-step, drifting in and out of the shadows of town. Sam wonders if Abigail and Sebastian are spying on them from the saloon. He almost turns around to check but stops himself so he can appreciate the moment.
Alex takes his shoes off when he reaches the sand of the beach, letting out a gasp of pleasure when his bare feet touch the cool stand. Sam follows his lead and takes his shoes off, too. They leave them there and cross down to the far-right dock, the sounds of waves lapping upon the shore getting louder as they go. They go all the way out to the landing at the end and the only light illuminating them is from the moon; Willy's apparently gone to sleep and even Elliot's cottage is dark, no late-night writing happening. They sit down next to each other.
"How was the saloon?" Alex asks.
"It was good. Sebastian was beating me in pool for a while," Sam says with a shrug, uncertain of how much information to offer. Alex makes a hum of amusement. Sam takes a breath before adding: "You're always welcome to come join us."
Sam watches Alex from the corner of his eye. Alex doesn't stiffen up or flinch or anything, just sort of tilts his head to the side as though in thought and then shrugs. "I dunno. I already show up to your practices sometimes, I don't want to crash your hang outs, too."
"You wouldn't be crashing it if I want you there," Sam protests.
"Yeah?" Alex asks with a smile, sounding surprised.
"Yeah!" Sam assures him. Then, because he can't just leave well enough alone, apparently, he adds: "Unless, there's another reason you don't want to go to the saloon?"
Alex looks at him, the smile dropping into a look of confusion. Shit. Sam thought Alex would understand what he was getting at without having to ask it outright. Alex is still working his way through asking what Sam had meant when Sam closes his eyes so he doesn't have to look at Alex as he clarifies. "In case you don't like being around beer."
"Ohhh. Because of my dad, you mean?" Sam nods, opening his eyes but still not looking at Alex. Alex is quiet for a moment in thought before he speaks. "I don't like drinking, but I don't think that has anything to do with my dad. I just think everything I've tried has tasted gross. Plus, I got drunk with Haley one time and how I felt the next day was not worth it. But it doesn't, like, upset me when other people drink. My dad is the only person I've ever seen get that way when he drinks. Other than, like, Shane, maybe. And even then, yes, he's kind of a dick but he's not, like, mean, y'know?" Sam chuckles weakly and nods. "You were kind of drunk when you fell down those stairs and I still helped you, didn't I?"
Oh. Sam hadn't considered that, honestly. "I guess so, yeah."
"It's nice that you thought about that, though," Alex tells him as he swings his feet gently where they're hanging off the side of the dock. "I just already hang out with you a lot, and I figured you'd want to hang out with your friends without me also being there."
"I mean, sometimes I guess, yeah," Sam replies. "Like, we don't have to hang out all the time. But I like spending time with you, and I like spending time with Sebastian and Abby, and I like the idea of us all spending time together.
"I didn't think Sebastian was too big a fan of me," Alex says with a chuckle.
"You're just not what he's used to," Sam tells him. "They're cool with you. Besides they know I like you, so they'll come around."
"You like me?" Alex asks. He sounds surprised and Sam doesn't know what to do with that. Is he playing coy, or were they just having fun and now Sam made it weird, or did Alex really just have no idea?
Sam turns to stare at him. Yes, that was the point he was working up to but that wasn't exactly how he had planned on announcing it. "Uh..., yeah," he stumbles out, no point in hiding it. "Abby might have used the phrase like like" - Alex did not need to know that part, come on, Sam - "to describe it. And I'm sorry if this was just like casual and I made things awkward or -"
Alex thankfully cuts Sam off by taking Sam's face in his hands and kissing him. Sam chases after Alex's mouth when the other man pulls away and he can feel the breath of Alex's laugh against his face. "I like like, you, too," Alex tells him.
When Sam opens his eyes Alex is smiling at him brightly and Sam smiles back. "I'm going to stop using the phrase 'like like' now, because it feels ridiculous," Sam declares and Alex laughs again and nods in agreement. "Look: I don't know what you'd call what we've been doing but I really like what we've been doing, and I want to do more of it. And I want that to include things like you hanging out with me, Abby, and Sebastian, or, I don't know, coming over for dinner?"
"I'd like that," Alex tells him, his voice as soft as the expression on his face. "Did we want to go back to the saloon now?"
Sam shakes his head. "No. Right now, I want to be here."