Archive of Our Own

Right now Ashton could only compare his feelings to that of a derailed comet – one that strayed from its orbit, all sense of purpose and direction lost from its reign.

All he knew was that he is now lost and by every second he was more and more convinced that maybe he wasn’t straying. Maybe he was being taken over by something else entirely. Maybe he was just intrigued by the distant blue star in the far horizon – so brilliant, so blueblueblue that he did not mind abandoning his orbit to get a closer look.

But it was such a stupid act and he knew it. Fuck if he didn’t know.

He knew it was stupid from the very moment he agreed to all this. He knew it was stupid from the second he looked into those cobalt blue orbs and decided the lust that glazed them over was a sign that they were supposed to at least ‘try and see how this would work out’.

He felt suffocated as he waited for the regular beeping noises to stop. It was not a feeling one usually feels while waiting for someone to answer their call, but Ashton couldn’t help it. He tried to tell himself he wasn’t nervous, but the constant tapping of his bare feet on the hotel floorings gave himself away. (Gave himself to who? It was not like he was with anyone at the moment.)

(Fuck, this whole thing is starting to eat away his sanity and munch at his conscience and laugh at his ridicule. He should try and slap himself just to see if rationale would willingly crawl into the back of his mind.)

(Wait, why would he even want to slap himself?)

(He decided Luke better fucking pick up his phone before Ashton loses the reign of his own mind. His brain was already doing a private fireworks show that sparks random facts from Lauren’s encyclopaedia of ‘The Universe and Space Exploration’ that he found between the sofa cushions back home.)

“Hey –”

Luke finally answered.

The thing that crossed Ashton’s mind when he heard Luke’s syrupy voice was not the fact that he was grateful that the kid finally picked up his damn phone, but realization that dawned upon him and hitting him square in the chest – how much he fucking missed Luke. “Hey Lu –”

“—Luke here. Sorry I can’t get to you at the moment. Leave a message after –”

Groaning, Ashton tapped the ‘end call’ button with unneeded force because fuck, that’s the fifteenth time his call went straight into Luke’s voicemail over the course of three days – and who the hell still uses their own voice as a voice-mail greeter?

(Luke Hemmings, the eighteen-year-old dork, apparently.)

(The beautiful, ethereal, eighteen-year-old dork.)

Ashton couldn’t help but smile at the thought. Luke Hemmings is truly a wonder of the universe, and Ashton dare says that Luke is a very handsome young man. Cerulean eyes striking like Jamaican sky – intense but never scares people away because those eyes are innocent and could possibly stop wars – and a cute button nose that Ashton swears is the only thing on another human being that he is jealous of. His broad shoulders and lip ring and surfer-blonde quiff and the light dusting of stubble and rock-star persona should be able to hide the fact that he is a massive dork but Ashton couldn’t be gladder that it never did.

Because Luke Hemmings won’t be the same wonder of the universe if it did.

However, Luke Hemmings is very much of an asshole wonder of the universe at the moment because he was not picking up his phone, thus pretty much ignoring Ashton’s existence over the past three days.

Ashton knew for sure that Luke was ignoring him on purpose. However, it was very unlike Luke to not pick up his phone or reply to messages as he believed it to be ‘rude and inconsiderate’. Besides, this whole shutting-himself-out-from-the-world-and-couldn’t-be-arsed-about-human-contact-when-he’s-upset thing is something only Michael would do, so it’s not Ashton’s fault that he was bombarded with the worst of thoughts.

The worst of thoughts here included that maybe Luke decided to take Botox injections and are now enduring the side-effects of it so that’s why he didn’t answer Ashton’s call – because his face is swollen and he cannot talk and fuck Ashton wants to pull his hair out.

Sighing, Ashton let himself fall onto the bed, fingers already knotted in his hair, pulling at the strands a little too roughly because he couldn’t help but feel like he deserved the slight pain. Or maybe because he just needed something to remind him of Luke. Luke likes pulling his hair, likes the sounds Ashton make whenever he does that. Ashton couldn’t remember a time when they fucked that Luke didn’t tangle his fingers in Ashton’s hair – sometimes giving it a soft tug that somehow never fails to elicit a choked whine from Ashton that only Luke ever get the chance to hear, while every other times the force of the pull is strong enough to make Ashton bare the expanse of his throat to Luke, completely offering the plane of skin to the other boy’s mercy.

It was almost like a muscle memory – his body falling enslaved to the touch with his neck bared in such a submissive way. Ashton would always be in control though, from start to end, tearing Luke apart piece by piece then putting him back together. But those mere moments of Ashton letting himself loose and providing Luke with the satisfaction of dominance were his favourite. Luke would kiss, bite, suck at his neck – never too hard to leave a mark, but enough to send him teetering over the edge and let go and take Luke along with him through the free fall. And all the while, the tug in his hair would constantly increase in fervour, sending every nerve in his brain into a supernova haywire until it felt like there were stars exploding behind his eyes.

It was when he accidentally tugged at his own hair a little too hard that he was suddenly dragged back to Earth and he was about to curse gravity when he remembered Luke will never pull that hard and fuck he missed Luke and oh. Oh. Luke probably hated him.

He had been avoiding the thought for three whole days, but now he thought it was time to finally come to terms with it. Luke had been avoiding him because he is angry about fuck-knows-what at Ashton.

Ashton found himself sighing, chest deflating, limbs sprawled defeated. He knew calling Luke again was not an option – Ashton still has his ego intact, thank you very much.

Just the thought of having to confront Luke and actually talk about this was causing his brain to do the supernova thing all over again, except this time it was sure to create a black hole that would swallow Ashton whole along with everything he believed in.

It felt like his chest was stuffed with too many flammable gases that his throat starts to burn and his body cells were catching fire and fuck he wanted to get out of his own skin before inevitably he combusts with guilt.

If there was one thing that they’re horrible at, it’s communication. Because fuck if Ashton will ever be brave enough to ask Luke about things that had been swirling inside his brain and taking residence next to his doubts and insecurity (there’s this thing called personal space – not the literal one – and that’s the unspoken boundary line he never wishes to cross with anyone). And fuck if Luke will ever speak out about his problems and admit that he was drowning in a self-made tsunami that consists of irrational thoughts and unspoken feelings.

That’s why they do what they’ve always done best. As long as the fucking elephant in the room is not addressed, everything will be fine. If one of them as much as thought about it, the other would be there to fuck the thoughts out of their brain.

They need to address the elephant this time. Ashton will make sure they do.

Luke, along with Michael and Calum were scheduled to arrive in L.A. today, but Ashton himself wasn’t sure at what time. Probably tonight, so that will allow him a few more hours to clear his mind and maybe relieve himself of the raging hard-on that was trapped against the confines of his jeans due to his little moment of arousal just now.

Maybe a bath was what he needed.

***

He finally lowered himself into the bubble bath he’d prepared beforehand, but only after violently jerking off to the thought of Luke’s pretty little mouth working wonders on his cock.

He plucked out of memory to remember just how good Luke looked while giving head – his pretty lips wrapped around Ashton’s cock warm and snug, blue eyes hazy with lust and shiny with unshed tears at the corners, clever fingers working around Ashton’s balls, fondling and playing and occasionally sinking his merciless nails for good measure.

But Luke wasn’t there and Ashton just couldn’t fucking come and he was so frustrated and he wanted Luke here so bad that he didn’t realize he was starting to shed tears. He was crying and he felt helpless. Letting himself sag against the hotel bathroom’s wall, Ashton found himself trying to calm his erratic breathing and blink the fucking tears away. He knew he couldn’t just will this raging boner away by merely having his own hands on his cock.

And that was how he found himself sitting on his own fingers at the edge of the bath tub with his unoccupied fingers sewn in his hair and Luke’s name rolling off his tongue when he came.

Still high from his recent orgasm Ashton let the warm water engulf him with a false sense of security, and he felt like he was hugged by a blanket of vanilla. It wasn’t enough to wash the guilt that stuffed the chambers of his heart full to the brim, but at least he could feel the knots in his muscles slowly unwinding. His right arm was a little sore but he kind of like the pain – the sting that tentatively licked at the strained muscles of his bicep, somewhat delicious and punishing at the same time. He got the same kind of burn after hours and hours of drumming and exercising and he should have already been accustomed, used to the pain. But he never will.

Moving his legs closer to his chest, Ashton watched as the water lapped against the sides of the tub, some spilling onto the floor. He made a mental note to be extra careful when he step out of the tub. Water from bubble baths can be pretty vengeful because he had once slipped and nearly cracked his own skull open.

It had merely been a couple of minutes but Ashton was already bored out of his mind. Maybe a bath wasn’t even a good idea after all, at least not when his nerves are all over the place and insecurity making a playground out of the environs of his mind.

Suddenly he felt like doing better things – maybe drum the energy out of him until he passed out or sign up for mixed martial arts classes or summat. Every nerve in his body was high on adrenaline and he needed to occupy himself with something. He could not possibly wank again because his arm was still pretty sore and his cock was still thrumming from oversensitivity.

So he settled with popping bubbles in the tub instead.

It went on for a good two minutes before he ran out bubbles.

Sighing, he let his back rest against one end of the bathtub, the cool ceramic a stark contrast against his warm skin. Somehow at one point while poking at bubbles his hair managed to fall onto his face and now he couldn’t even be arsed to lift his arm and push the strands out of the way. His limbs were at risk of lack of coordination so he might manage to poke himself in the eye with fingers wet with vanilla bath liquid.

Maybe he should though. Maybe he’d poke himself in the eye really hard that he couldn’t open it for one long hour and maybe that period of time would be enough for him to start mapping the galaxy behind his eyelids. Maybe he’d be able to find Luke’s smile in the form of a cyan-and-green nebula, mimicking the colour of the pair of eyes that are so ethereal and beautiful and piercing and could generate the birth of stars.

Fuck, if there was a drug named Luke, Ashton was sure as hell high on it.

That was when he heard a few faint knocks, followed by the sound of a door opening.

With the state of his sluggish mind Ashton was surprised he even managed to panic for a bit. Because he suddenly remembered that he forgot to put the lock chain on. And that could be a burglar breaking into his room.

Fuck.

Okay, Ashton should allow himself some fucking positive thoughts, right? Because that might be his fellow band members who couldn’t be arsed to text him and decided to just ‘hey let’s barge into Ashton’s room and drag his arse to Mahiki or something’.

Either way whoever was currently trudging into his room was probably going to see him wide-eyed and buck naked in the bath tub. They better not be perverted burglars.

“Ashton?”

The muffled voice was everything Ashton wanted to hear and more. A voice so beautiful Ashton was sure no heavenly body dare to rival it, even if meteor showers and Aurora Australis chose to simultaneously appear in Los Angeles out of the blue.

“Ash?” Luke called again, this time followed by a loud thud that indicated the younger had just dropped his luggage in the middle of Ashton’s room.

Ashton made a mental note to slap the back of Luke’s head and give him a lecture about leaving his stuff lying around in Ashton’s room.

There was a couple of knocks against the bathroom door and a muffled ‘Are you inside?’ sounding from the other side of the vicinity. The younger lad however, in typical Luke Hemmings’ style, did not even wait for Ashton’s reply before Ashton saw the doorknob twisting and tuff of blonde quiff poking out from behind the now-opened door.

“Hey!” He found himself yelling, mustering all seriousness in coercing his face to look offended. Heaven knows if he ever felt anything other than endeared, because just look at that dumb puppy with his hands over his eyes as he stumbled into the bathroom. God, stupid, stupid dork. Ashton’s heart was swelling with endearment.

“Are you naked?” Luke asked as he stood there leaning against the sink, re-enacting the monkey emoji.

“I’m in the bathroom, you expect me to wear a swimsuit or something?” Ashton retorted. Suddenly he regretted poking the bubbles. Now he had none to cover his private areas with. Oh well.

Luke’s laugh echoed in the bathroom.

Ashton narrowed his eyes. What he said wasn’t even funny. And no, Ashton Irwin does not get endeared by crinkly-eyed laughter and the shake of someone’s shoulders when they do so. And did Luke grow his beard?

He didn’t ask though, even after Luke’s laughter had died down and he was removing his hands from eyes, dropping his innocent façade altogether. Luke Hemmings is far from innocent, Ashton knows that much. That was why he did not even bother to blush as Luke gave him a thorough, undoubtedly shameless once-over – no, he really didn’t.

“Take a picture, Luke, it’ll last a hell lot longer.” Ashton rolled his eyes for good measure, but didn’t fight the smirk that tugged the edge of his lips.

Luke did not reply. Only let his tongue dart out to wet his lips, before marching towards the tub.

Yes, apparently the kid did grow out his beard. And who was Ashton to complain about such a rare, aesthetical sight. Except for the fact that it was kind of long. And made him look twenty-five. And smoulderingly hot. And it had Ashton imagining how good they would feel between his fucking thighs.

“Like what you see?” The cocky asshole dared wiggle his eyebrows, so Ashton had to roll his eyes again.

“Is there ever a time that I don’t, Mr. Hemmings?” He considered batting his eyelashes mockingly but his curls were pretty much waved together with them at the moment so.

Luke seated himself at the edge of the tub, balancing on half a bum. The edge of his black-and-red-flannel fell off the side and dipped into the water, but the younger lad didn’t seem to mind.

The fact that Luke was fully clothed (he still had his sunglasses hung at the collar of his black v-neck and he even still had his fucking shoes on and his Boss cologne was making Ashton slightly dizzy) and Ashton was sitting in tub in all his naked glory, of course he would feel slightly abashed. Ashton is never the most confident person when it comes to his body and appearance.

Luke’s shameless scrutiny sure was not helping either. Ashton was glad Luke didn’t say anything when he pulled his legs closer to his chest in the hopes of hiding some of his private parts for the sake of his own dignity. Ashton doesn’t like it when people see him naked, unless it’s for the seeking of coital high.

Through the curtains of his hair Ashton could see Luke trying to fish something out of his pocket, but still he was quite surprised to see that he brandished his iPhone instead.

“I’m just following your suggestion; could save a picture for rainy days.”

The next moments were filled by a couple of camera shutter sounds and Luke smirking at the screen and Ashton’s very unmanly squeak of ‘No!’

“Rainy, horny days.” Luke let forth a dreamy sigh, and Ashton elongated his legs so he could kick the lad on his knee. It was playful enough that it didn’t hurt Luke, but that didn’t stop the kid with the worst balance in the world to topple slightly and nearly wetting his arse in the bathtub.

Ashton growled. “Delete it, Hemmings.”

Steadying himself once again, Luke tucked the phone back into the pocket of his skinnies. “Nah, never.”

“Delete it, come on Luke,” Ashton sagged against the tub. “If Cal or Michael finds that they’ll have our heads and probably roast me for it every Christmas until I’m 80, those bastards.”

“They won’t be able to remember those pics without getting a boner though, because Ashton Irwin in a bathtub, naked with glistening skin and hair in his eyes and raw-bitten lips is a wank worthy material.”

Ashton’s jaw fell open for a solid two seconds. “Get out of my bathroom, you dirty tosser.”

Luke guffawed in reply, eyes pressed closed, head thrown back. He was such an irony, a walking paradox that it fogged Ashton’s mind with raw confusion and blissful awe. How can someone who looks so innocent say the dirtiest, filthiest things? How can the little cherubic angel have the sinful tongue of the devil? How can something so pure looks so pornographic?

Even when he was puffing out the last remnants of his laughter Luke was still eyeing Ashton down. Probably testing his luck to see if he could catch a glimpse Ashton’s cock under the rippling water.

Such a pervert.

Ashton managed to exclaim with fake indignant, “Stop staring at me you perverted… caveman!”

Luke was never into dramatics but he did pull off a much exaggerated sigh that sounded like kitten choking on a fur ball. “I tried so hard to pull off a Brad Pitt look and you dare call me a caveman?”

If Ashton was honest Luke did manage to look like a professional, rich-ass movie star especially with the touch of his new ‘grown-up shoes’ which entire existence Ashton refused to address. The light dusting of stubble was now replaced with slightly longer strands of facial hair that seemed to bring out the striking blue of his eyes.

But Luke looked genuinely offended by the caveman term and Ashton’s going to use that to get on his nerves. How dare he even consider keeping a picture of Ashton buck naked in a bathtub for his wank bank?

“It does make you look kind of homeless so,” Ashton commented, trying to act nonchalant and dismissive.

The younger lad’s eyebrows met in the middle, sewn together with irritation. But the quirk of his lips should have warned Ashton. “Imagine how they’d feel rubbing against your thighs though. Or against your collarbones when I trail my lips there.”

Those words sent a gush of warmth through Ashton’s body, blood rushing through his veins making a journey straight towards his dick. “You can’t just say things like that, Hemmings.”

Luke chuckled as he began shuffling closer. “God, you’re so pretty when you blush, Ashton.”

If Ashton wasn’t blushing he sure was now. Suddenly he was very grateful for the curtain of curls over his face, because suddenly his throat wasn’t capable of shooting a sentence of response. Sarcasm had always been his best shield, but not now unfortunately.

Apparently Luke found Ashton’s sudden silence amusing hence the constant string of chuckles. Mortified, Ashton let his gaze land at the other end of the tub, refusing to meet the other boy’s mischief-lit orbs.

When Luke’s fingers reached to touch his cheek Ashton tried hard to refrain from flinching. Luke’s fingers are always cold Ashton sometimes wondered if Luke was descended from the Count Dracula or something. If he really was then that’d explain such otherworldly beauty.

“Your fingers are cold,” Ashton murmured, nuzzling slightly at the caressing digits. The metal rings around them scratching his cheek slightly, but Ashton didn’t mind. He never minded. He liked the rings.

“Your hair is in your eyes.” With that, Luke carded his fingers through the strands before tucking them behind the elder’s ear. Ashton shivered when the rings made contact with his earlobe. He felt fingers under his chin, moving his head so he would meet Luke’s cerulean eyes. “Wow, your cheeks are really flushed. Are you really that embarrassed about me seeing you naked right now?”

He smirked, “Nothing you haven’t seen before, Hemmings.”

“Very true, but you look exceptionally obscene at the moment so can I kiss you?”

The sentence carved an even wider smirk on Ashton’s face. Stretching his arms invitingly he mumbled, “C’mere.”

Luke, of course, went straight for Ashton’s lips. A little too hastily, the hazel-eyed might add as their teeth clanked and their noses bumped awkwardly. But they were both so used to this that a split second later they had both found the perfect angle and their mouths met like puzzle pieces.

Their kisses were rarely innocent. In fact kisses are something they do quite seldom. They fuck more than they share spit. During the first months of them doing ‘this thing’ between them, they adamantly avoided mouth kisses. That changed of course, as they got more comfortable with one another and ‘this thing’ become more of a need than a want. But still, they never forgot to ask the other for verbal permission. Consent is sexy. An-awkward-close-friend-slash-fuck-buddy-asking-for-a-kiss is sexy too.

Closing his eyes, Ashton felt fingers tugging his hair and fuck, he felt like he was flying past Jupiter’s rings. Wrapping his arms around the lanky lad, Ashton pulled his wiry frame closer and decided to reward him with his tongue.

He licked Luke’s lower lip, seeking permission before toying with the younger’s lip ring. Luke moaned into Ashton’s mouth, declaring his pleasure and granting access. Darting his tongue inside, Ashton licked the crevices of Luke’s mouth, tasting him, breathing him in. He tasted like chocolate and… nuts. Maybe Luke had a Snickers while on the plane.

And his newly-grown beard was scratching at the sides of Ashton’s lips and his cheeks. It tickled slightly but the friction left such a delicious burn it made Ashton’s toes curl against the floor of the tub.

He could feel Luke’s tongue caressing his gently, but Ashton could sense the seeking of dominance in the act. Pulling his tongue out of Luke’s mouth he didn’t expect the lad to whine at the retreat.

Chuckling into the eighteen-year-old’s mouth, Ashton pressed their lips together hard for one last time. His dick was half hard under the water and Luke’s breathing was starting to get erratic.

He wanted to pull away but Luke’s hand was firm around the back of his head, fingers weaved into his slightly-damp curls. Luke took advantage of his own brief moment of control and nipped at Ashton’s upper lip – once, twice, before parting Ashton’s lips and rested his own between them.

“God, Ashton,” Luke sighed.

And Ashton realized how he liked his own name the most when Luke was sighing it into his mouth, breath warm and syllables syrupy. It could be compared to getting high on molasses – it was so impossible it made him giddy. Giddy with something akin to lust licking at the ends of his veins.

Fuck he felt like he was on fire. Ashton was on fire and Luke was the flame that ignites him up. For Luke he’d let himself burn over and over and he was pretty sure he would still feel the same when his bones turned to ashes and all he had left was a name that could be blown into the wind at any time.

He opened his eyes to Luke’s sky blue ones bearing his gaze, their orbs mirroring each other’s lust and dreaminess. Foreheads glued, nose bumping and fingers tangled in the other’s locks.

“Hi,” Ashton breathed.

“Hi.” The younger was just a breathless, panting between his cherubic giggles. “Did I give you a boner yet?”

“You little shit!” Ashton shoved Luke playfully on the shoulder, the lad stumbling backward with a guffaw. “I can’t believe you’re just using me, you pervert!”

Steadying himself Luke questioned, “Which one am I, though? A pervert or a caveman?”

“A perverted caveman, that’s what you are you sneaky bastard.”

Luke cocked an eyebrow. “I’m the sneaky one? You’re the one that’s been having fun without me! I saw the bottle of lube on the sink, uncapped and some of it spilled. So tell me, what have you been up to before I came in?”

“What?” Ashton’s gaze landed on said bottle of lube lying abandoned on the sink. Heat crept onto his cheeks. “I didn’t –”

“We’ve been fucking for so long and you don’t think I’ll know what you’ll look like post-orgasm? Cheeks flushed, hair askew, lips bitten raw? Try again, Mr. Irwin.”

That sneaky shit, Ashton swore – that sneaky shit and his cocky little smirk, like he knew everything about the order of the universe and the amount of stars in the sky and Ashton believed he does.

If Luke raised his eyebrow even higher Ashton swore it was going to reach his hairline. Or maybe the highest peak on Earth but that was beside the point. The point was that Ashton was horny and he hated Luke.

“Who are you and what have you done to my innocent Luke Hemmings?” Ashton said in mock hysterics. Water was spilling out of the tub and wetting Luke’s jeans but neither of them seemed to give the slightest care about it. “Bring back my lovely little Lukey Poo, you caveman before I start yelling for the security about some perverted Flintstone wannabe barging into my room – hey!”

He couldn’t finish his sentence as Luke already launched his assault – long, lanky arms went under Ashton’s knees and behind his shoulders and fuck, he knew what was coming.

“No! No!”

“Too late, Irwie.”

With that Ashton was hauled out of the tub by the modern-day Aussie dork of a barbarian that is Luke Hemmings. Ignoring the fact that the water was wetting the front of his clothes and Ashton was full-on letting out not-so-manly squeaks as he tried to grab at anything he could get his fingers on for purchase, Luke lifted the older man and properly positioned him bridal style against his broad chest.

For Ashton’s standard this was quite embarrassing.

“Luke put me down or I swear to God—”

The younger spun on the balls on his feet, causing Ashton to let forth yet another pathetic squeal. This kid might drop him. And they might both fall and split their heads open and Ashton didn’t want to die naked.

When Luke started walking towards the door Ashton couldn’t help but wrap his arms around the blonde’s neck reluctantly. “Don’t you dare drop me you titwanker!”

The younger actually had the audacity to throw his head back and laughed. Ashton nearly slipped out of his hold as Luke continued to carry him out of the bathroom, which resulted in both of them screaming in fear and surprise.

“I told you not to drop me!”

“I wasn’t gonna drop you!”

 To prove his point Luke stopped his pace to correct Ashton’s position in his arms, gripping tightly despite the water that was making his hold slippery.

“See?”

“God.” Ashton dropped his head on Luke’s shoulder, closing his eyes and inhaling the scent of Luke’s cologne. He couldn’t help but feel disappointed with the fact that the cologne was masking Luke’s original scent – the salty smell of his sweat, the tang of his arousal… just the distinct smell that is simply lukelukeluke.

“A year ago I can only lift you with piggybacks, now look where we are.”

“Oh wow, the prince charming has now managed to sweep me off my feet. Now are we gonna ride ponies over the rainbows or are you just gonna stand here with me in your arms while we flood the floor because I’m sure there are a lot of water pooling underneath us right now.”

“Well actually I was about to act out the role of the caveman you claimed me to be, you know.”

“Oh really?” Ashton lifted his head just to cock an eyebrow at the younger lad. “What’s stopping you though?”

Luke hummed, “Maybe it’s because we never tried role play and we need to discuss that again. But I can still ravish you like a proper caveman – let me just get us to the bed.”

“No no no! Not the bed! I’m carrying a gallon of water with me, the bed’s gonna be wet Luke!”

Luke was already trudging towards the bed and Ashton genuinely considered thrashing and jumping out of the lanky boy’s hold. However, Luke’s strides were quick and long enough that it didn’t give Ashton enough time to act impulsively because the next thing he knew, he was thrown onto the hotel bed.

He managed a groan of frustration before pushing himself up onto his elbows, glaring angrily at the grinning boy at the edge of the bed. Ashton felt like kicking his balls so he could erase that smug beam that was dancing across the blonde’s lips.

He tried holding the antagonizing stare, with difficulty of course because just the sight of Luke towering over him, lips pulled into a cryptic smile, eyes twinkling with mischief had his heart hammering hard against his chest. The Adonis statue in all his bearded glory was already rendering Ashton’s heart into a lustful frenzy on its own. He surely did not need help from the tongue that kept darting out of Luke’s mouth to wet his lips, leaving them glistening in the dim light of the room. There was heat pooling at the pit of his stomach, churning like tidal waves but warm like distant forest fires. He was getting hard, he knew it.

Luke Hemmings is like the epitome of sin. Everything about him is sinful. Sinful glare, sinful smirk, sinfully tight skinny jeans, voice that makes you want to sin over and over again.

Every single religious book should have warned the world about walking-sins that come with cobalt blue orbs and lip rings. Because Ashton’s entranced by them and now he couldn’t leave. He could never leave.

That was probably why he didn’t even move when Luke climbed onto the bed and moved to straddle Ashton’s sprawled thighs, using his knees to bring them closer together in one expert move.

Ashton was sure the hard lines on his own face had dissipated by the time Luke seated himself carefully on top of the older lad’s muscular thighs, the material of his jeans rubbing harshly against delicate skin.  If only he’d moved forward by an inch or two it would’ve given Ashton’s dick some desperately-craved friction and maybe Ashton won’t be the only one in the room with a semi hanging free.

From where he was laying on the bed he could see Luke’s hungry eyes raking shamelessly all over his body, probably taking the debauched sight before him and engraining it into the walls of his memory box.

And suddenly Ashton was consciously aware of the fact that he was buck naked, and Luke was still fully clothed.

Just as Luke’s gaze landed on Ashton’s dick, the older lad cleared his throat and pointed out, “Carrying me, throwing me onto the bed, and now sitting on me – those are some porn video material, Mr Hemmings. What’s the occasion?”

Slowly lifting his gaze from Ashton’s half-hard cock, Luke smirked. “Nothing really. Your birthday had passed so it’s too late for birthday sex, and mine’s coming in a few days but you know I hate early presents.” He shrugged.  “Just wanted to prove some points to you, namely that one time when I said I can manhandle you just as much as you can manhandle me.”

Ashton frowned in confusion as his memory tapes began working like clockwork. If he wasn’t wrong they had that particular conversation a little over a month ago, locking themselves in the toilet backstage. They had a slight banter that started with Luke raking his fingers all over Ashton’s biceps saying how he was mesmerized at the bulge of the muscles as they held him up by his thighs against the door. Ashton had fingered Luke through his nonsensical rumblings and his claims about being able to do the same towards Ashton, to which the older lad snorted at.

Ashton dropped his gaze, eyebrows furrowing. “Oh, I didn’t know you took it to the heart, Luke, I’m sorry –”

“Hey hey, it’s okay Ash!” Luke’s hand was quick to nudge the older boy’s chin, guiding his face upward so their gazes could meet. “I didn’t take it to the heart, at all. That was all in good spirits – you know how much I like competition, and how much more I like it when I can prove you wrong.”

Ashton snorted. Luke giggled.

“So don’t worry, I wasn’t even offended. Ego a bit wounded, which was why I did it in the first place. Planned to do it in front of the other boys but what will those shitfucks say? Saw the opportunity just now, so I took it. Just competitions between bros. No homo.”

Ashton decided he had had enough so he shoved the taller lad off his thigh, sending him tumbling onto the bed guffawing throatily. Ashton hates the dork so much he didn’t even understand why he was laughing along.

Letting himself fall back against the bed, Ashton found himself staring at the ceiling as he finished the remnants of his laughter.

“I hate you Luke.”

He turned towards his right, only to be met with the sight of Luke Hemmings being an adorable little shit lying on his stomach with his chin in the palm of his hand.

“Awh, I hate you too, Ash.”

Prune-y fingers reached to somehow swat at Luke’s arm but the little shit was so sneaky he managed to roll away. Whilst giggling, of course. “God you’re so annoying. And you managed to move us from porn video to a rom-com in like two minutes. To be honest I’m kind of disappointed because I was wishing I could get a blowjob or something you know?”

Luke rolled back onto his tummy before slowly pushing himself up onto his elbow. His voice seemed to drop an octave when he said, “Just say the word, Ash. Say the word and I’ll do it.”

Ashton had to close his eyes and turn to lie on his back again because;

                                1. He hates Luke Hemmings and his stupid, boner-killing jokes.

2. The fucker’s voice had a delicious, filthy edge to it that sent electric jolts down Ashton’s spine and blood rushing towards his dick.

“Lord have mercy; you’re killing my boner because that sounds like bad porn lines,” Ashton managed through his teeth, fingers twitching at his sides.

“That’s what you’ve always said to me though.” He could hear Luke’s non-committal shrug in his sentence.

“Excuse me; I did not sound like a bad porn video. You’re the one trying to prove a point by hauling me out of the bathtub and carrying me around like you are Edward Cullen or something.”

He heard sheets rustling and the next thing he saw was Luke leaning over him, eyes still sparkly, smug smile still hugging his pink lips. “What do you expect I’d do instead in order to prove that point though?”

Luke’s words were airy with something else that definitely wasn’t just curiousness. The slight darkening of his orbs and the way he pulled the fleshiest part of his bottom lip into his mouth gave him away.

And Ashton was feeling lightheaded because Luke’s face was now directly above his. Maybe it was the hot breath fanning against his face. Maybe it was the way the dim light was highlighting the planes of Luke’s face. Maybe Luke was an Adonis marble statue after all. Maybe Ashton was high of wantwantwant and the fact that Luke was actually here, finally here, so close to him.

The younger challengingly cocked an eyebrow, “Well?”

Ashton blinked. “I don’t know. If we fucked in the tub instead that’d save us from getting water all over the floor over there and spare us a dry bed for the night. But you know, since you insist on exhibiting them strong muscles I guess I have to sleep on the balcony’s chair.”

“Or,” Luke hauled himself up a bit before hovering over Ashton, his entire body caging the older lad. His arms were the only thing stopping their bodies from melding together into one. “You can ride me on said balcony chair right under the night sky, frantic and quick and fast because we’re both scared of getting caught. I can hold your hips and fuck up into you just as fervently, or I can flip us around and ram into you hard and fast. Or we could do that against the fucking balcony if we want. Seventeen stories high above innocent streetwalkers – you can be as loud as you want, I can go as hard as I can.”

Fuck.

Ashton couldn’t remember a time when Luke’s voice had sounded so filthy in its sweet slight rasp, tinged with raw want. He could feel his dick shooting up, hardening in interest and fuck, he needed a hand there. His, or better, Luke’s. Maybe Luke’s mouth would be better. Fuck. Just the mere thought of having sex on a chair on an open balcony, seventeen floors above the ground bathed in the dim light of the full moon…

His hand had never darted towards his cock faster than this, but he needed something – anything. Gripping the now-fully-hard flesh, Ashton gave himself a slow stroke, his mouth puffing out a breath he had been holding for so long. Throwing his head back Ashton let his eyes close, fingers continuing its work on his dick.

“Fuck, Luke,” he breathed as his thumb moved to touch his slit. His legs jerked in reaction, bumping against Luke’s. “Need you.”

Luke let forth an airy chuckle. “Need me? Need my what?”

“Your hand,” he choked out, breath desperately climbing in and out of his tight lungs. “Need your fucking hands.”

Luke’s fingers at the sides of his face caused his eyes to shoot open in surprise.

The first thing he saw was the blueness of Luke’s eyes slowly being consumed by the dilating black of his pupils, like lightning against a stormy black sky. Contrasting. Dangerous. Beautiful.

He knew what the ancients said about the butterflies but right now there were planets colliding with one another inside his stomach, inevitably exploding. Feeding him with irrevocable lust. Crushing his bones and stealing his oxygen.

That’s what Luke does to him.

Maybe Ashton’s not a derailed comet. Maybe he’s a fucking shooting star, because he was falling. Falling for Luke.

He should be scared. He’d never let himself lose all control. If others thrive on being taken care of then Ashton thrives on taking care of others. He had always been content in being others’ anchor and never felt the need to want one, or felt the want to need one.

The younger’s slender, icy fingers stroked the sides of Ashton’s face, gentle as ever. Somehow it kept him grounded, kept him from floating past the satellites.

Luke’s voice was both hoarse and soft when he murmured, “Or I can give you my mouth. Can I give you my mouth instead?”

“Fuck,” Ashton breathed haltingly, his back arching with want. “Fuck yes.”

That was all it took for Luke to turn crawl between Ashton’s legs and grip his wrist, stopping its frantic, desperate motions.

Releasing his grip on Ashton’s hand, Luke lowered his head slowly towards Ashton’s erection. His breath fanning against the older lad’s cock, sending shivers down Ashton’s spine.

Luke was staring at his dick with unmasked hunger, like a starving prey. If Ashton didn’t know better he would’ve said Luke was practically salivating.

But he did know better. Luke’s thirst for Ashton’s cock is a real thing. Ashton didn’t think there’s anyone in the world who could rival Luke’s enjoyment for sucking dicks. He’d work hard to please –he’d suck and lick and tease and work Ashton up and he’d always swallow. Always.

Ashton thinks it’s amazing how someone found him worthy to focus their sexual energy on.

Fuck. Luke barely did anything to him but Ashton already felt like a wreck. Limbs weak and unmoving, only twitching in anticipation once in a while.

He needed something. Anything. Because Luke is everything but was currently giving him nothing.

Luke started his work using his soft, bony hands. He brought them to Ashton’s thighs, gripping underneath the thick flesh. With a smirk etched at the edge of his lips, Luke began parting Ashton’s leg apart so all of Ashton was presented to him in all their glory.

Ashton couldn’t help but flush at the daring action. He wasn’t used to being this exposed. He was completely naked and Luke hadn’t even undressed.

But Luke grabbed the base of his cock and brought his lips to the top of it, all of his conscious thoughts were replaced by fucksogood and moremoremore. His thighs were straining against Luke’s hold as the younger began gliding the tip of Ashton’s cock along his bottom lip.

When his slit caught against Luke’s lip ring, Ashton’s couldn’t stop the involuntary jerk of his hip. (He didn’t know if he was jerking away from the cruel metal, or was simply chasing more of the fleeting moment of pleasure.)

He was barely aware of the whimper he couldn’t hold in, and it seemed to attract Luke’s attention. He pulled away from Ashton’s cock slightly.

Luke looked up at him, crystal irises hidden behind long, sultry lashes – somewhat coy and innocent. There was a glint of naïve eagerness in his eyes, flooded by the lustful black of his pupil.

Luke Hemmings was far from innocent. His deep chuckle and cocky smirk were probably enough to prove that. There was precome dribbling down his chin, getting his cherubic face all messy and dirty. It was such an obscene sight, the most beautiful.

“Patience, Irwin,” he chided huskily before running his tongue over his lip, tasting Ashton’s precome.

Ashton wanted to nut right there and then.

When Luke’s tongue made contact with the tip of Ashton’s cock he found himself releasing a harsh breath – a breath he didn’t even realize he was holding. There were planets and stars and asteroids inside of his chest and Ashton felt like he could explode from the inside.

Seemed to realize the effects he had on the older boy, Luke began leaving small kitten licks to the tip. Tonguing the slit, Luke hungrily lapped up the precome that was beading there. Occasionally he would let part of his tongue past the guard of his lips before licking the underside of Ashton’s cock straight towards his balls.  

Luke began to sporadically thrust his tongue between the sacks and Ashton could do nothing but writhe against the sheets. His body was quickly heating up from the increasing amount of pleasure that the cotton sheets felt somewhat icy against his backside. He was panting in between grunts as electric coursed through his body with Luke’s merciless treatment.

And Ashton could not hold in the beast of sounds that he was unleashing. It took its most guttural, primal form crawling out of his throat and into the warm air of the room. The stretch of Luke’s smirk was getting wider and wider with every sound Ashton was making, head lifted just enough to maintain eye contact between them.

It was all so little but already was almost too much. The only thing that was stopping his thighs from closing around Luke’s head was Luke’s strong hands.

He kept thanking his lucky stars for the young man between his legs at the moment because damn if it wasn’t a pretty sight. Luke’s lips glistening with saliva and Ashton’s precome. His lip-ring a paradox – sinful in its façade but glowed like a moon’s halo in the dim light.

Luke gave no warning before he went down on Ashton’s cock, swallowing it bit by bit and letting his wet lips glide along the shaft. And fuck, fuck, fuck Ashton was engulfed by warmth and wetness and restless tongue. He let out a moan of ‘fuck, so good Luke, so good’, letting his eyes shut close and immersed himself into the pleasure bathing him. There was stardust raining on his skin, kissing his sweaty skin and leaving it prickling with pleasure. There was electric in his veins and fire licking under his skin.

This is really good. Really dirty, but really good.

And he cannot fathom how good it actually felt, or if other existing words could be used to describe this otherworldly feeling. Maybe not. Or maybe his brain just short-wired.

Ashton could feel the occasional graze of teeth against the sensitive skin of his cock – his muscles never failed to twitch in surprise, and moans kept crowding out of his throat scratchy and desperate.

It was when Luke began his sucking motions that Ashton nearly lost his mind. Luke’s name was practically mantra on his lips after that.

He could feel the insides of Luke’s cheeks, wet but somewhat as it glided up and down, up and down. Ashton’s breath was hitching at every familiar sensation but he couldn’t care less. He started a mantra of Luke’s name. Encouraging. Praising. He couldn’t take any more but he wanted so much more.

Ashton wanted to keep his moans down – for the sake of the people in the neighbouring rooms, and for the sake of listening to the wet, filthy sounds Luke was making. Every little sucking noise and every little slurp. But he, for the life of him, couldn’t.

Luke began humming around his cock, sending pleasuring vibrations up the shaft. This is too good.

He didn’t even need to open his eyes to witness the debauched sight before him. He had the image ingrained behind his eyelids – Luke with his red, swollen lips wrapped snug around his cock, pupils blown so wide the black spilled into the innocent blue irises.

But Ashton opened his eyes anyway. He couldn’t help but moan at the obscene sight before him.

He didn’t know when Luke got himself onto his hands and knees, but he sure appreciated the effort because hell. Luke is the most beautiful when he’s on his hands and knees. But right now he was more than just the most beautiful – all swollen lips and hollowed cheeks, fucking eager to give and pleasure.

He was cosmic. Unreal.

 “God Luke, you’re so beautiful,” Ashton breathed.

Luke smiled – fucking smiled – around his cock before enveloping his teeth with his lips and gliding down even further. His fingers tightened around Ashton’s thighs, nails leaving crescent-moon indents against the skin of the muscles. Ashton’s hands were scrambling for purchase before finally settling for the sheet, sinking his nails there like an anchor.

Ashton was watching the action with eyes blown wide. Fuck, Luke was taking all of him, all the way down. And oh fuck, so that’s Luke’s way of saying ‘thank you’ to compliments from Ashton. Ashton decided he’s going to be telling Luke that more often then.

He could feel Luke’s nails digging deeper into the meat of his thighs, the pressure increasing by every centimetre of his movement.

And fuck. He could feel his cock touching the back of Luke’s throat. He could feel Luke’s nose against his pubic bone, nestled between the fine hairs crowning his erection. He could feel his life leaving his body, his conscience dissipating, sense of control finally slipping. Like planets derailed from orbits. His emotion was something close to a scattered nebula – overwhelming, beautiful but still incomprehensible and just everywhere. But still beautiful, indeed. It was such a beautiful feeling.

Maybe he’s lost function of his brain. Maybe he had just reached nirvana. Maybe Luke is his nirvana.

He was brought back to the room when he heard the sound of Luke gagging, and the feeling of his throat spasm around Ashton’s cock. The flutter of the muscle sent Ashton into overdrive as the tunnel that was blanketing his cock tightened reluctantly. Hips canting upwards, Ashton chased the pleasure for another taste of it.

He felt it again, the tip of his cock against the velvety wall at the back of Luke’s throat. His erection twitched and then it was like the domino effect. One by one of nerves were lit and soon his body was on fire. His body was engulfed by pleasure that was threatening to drown him.

He felt like he was experiencing an out-of-body experience. As if his soul floated out of his body to witness the events unfolding before him. It reminded him of the times he used to watch the terrarium of galaxy at the back of his kindergarten class – six-year-old him knew he was a part of it, but was puzzled as to why he could see it then.

He couldn’t feel his limbs. He couldn’t comprehend such a nebulous experience, and they hadn’t even fucked yet. Luke does things to him. Luke does things to his mind. Luke does things to his heart.

It should be scary. But he was so familiar with this. So familiar to the tugging, white-hot sensation in his gut. He was so, so close. So fucking close that all he could focus on was everything. And nothing at all. His mind was in circles, like it was running laps around Saturn’s rings. Head spinning wild, breath sporadic, nerves lighting up like a comet’s tail.

Ashton almost didn’t want to come. He knew that an orgasm will put an end to such transcendence. Like falling into a space with no gravity. But Luke was his subconscious gravitation.

He nearly missed the warm envelope’s tightening around his cock, but the choking sound that followed was clear as day to him.

And then it ended. The crevice of Luke’s mouth left his cock, leaving it exposed to the warm air.

Had he gone too far?

Fuck, he surely had gone too far. Too caught up in chasing his orgasm and the pleasure promised by the wet, firm embrace of Luke’s mouth that he forgot about the younger lad himself.

The strong grip on his thighs disappeared, leaving the painful indents behind. Is Luke leaving?

No. No, he could not be leaving. Ashton needed to apologize to him, for treating him with carelessness on the sole purpose of chasing his release. God Ashton felt like a terrible person. Terrible, terrible person. He swore he’d never act like this. Never to use Luke to his own wishes and desire recklessly like this.

He felt like crying. And why must he feel like crying?

Why can’t he open his eyes?  

His head felt… Almost cloudy. Everything was so unclear. So distant. But his thoughts were all jumbled up and everywhere and all-at-once. He couldn’t think, but at the same time thoughts were swimming around his head, mocking him, torturing him.

 “Ashton?” Came Luke’s frantic voice. Concerned. Grounding. He decided then, Luke was indeed his gravity. The orbit to his comet. Not just his gravity. Maybe Luke is his entire universe.

There were fingers in his hair. Softer than feather, pushing the strands out of his face before caressing his cheek.

“Ashton, babe? Can you open your eyes for me?” Luke’s voice was laced with worry, but soothing and velvety nonetheless. There was a rough edge to it, probably from the brutal deep-throating.

Shit.

Deep-throating.

The slap from reality was the one that peeled Ashton’s eyes open. Fuck what had he done?

“Fuck,” Ashton panted, breath frantic as he found it hard to focus on his sight. His mind was every-fucking-where. And all he saw was Luke, hovering over him. “Luke I – fuck, I’m sorr—”

“No no no, shhh,” Luke hushed him, voice breathy and soft as if trying not to scare away a wounded animal. His brought his palms to Ashton’s jaw, “Hey, hey, Ash, babe. Relax okay? You did nothing wrong. I like what you did, and you did good babe. So good.”

The fog that was taking residence around his mind finally started to clear. His vision refocusing. “Good?” he inquired, unsure.

“Really good,” Luke smiled. “Thank you.”

Of course Luke would thank someone for fucking his throat raw. “Fuck.”

Luke chuckled, all silvery and good-hearted.

The remaining fog was causing Ashton difficulties in comprehending things. Brows furrowed, he asked, “What… What happened? Why are you laughing Luke?”

Luke’s laugh reduced to a soft smile, hands continued to caress the skin of Ashton’s face. A small gesture, but it was so comforting. And Ashton never thought he’d needed it. “I wasn’t laughing at you. But this whole thing is quite a lot to take in. You sort of… went… out for a bit? I don’t know what happened to you, but you were being extra-responsive. Your eyes, fuck, I couldn’t see the green anymore. And you were moaning so loud I bet the people upstairs heard it.”

Heat crept onto Ashton’s face. Not only did he not expect to hear that, but he was embarrassed by the fact that he allowed himself to be that… vulnerable. Of course, it wasn’t the first time on the receiving end of a blowjob, mind you. But there has got to be an explanation as to why he was acting so out of it, so overwhelmed by a simple sexual act.

“Do you… like…” Luke removed his hands from Ashton’s face, only to have one combing his blonde quiff sheepishly. “Ashton, are you… Okay, fuck this but what happened to you… it’s not subdrop, we both know that but what if –”

“It felt like giving up control,” Ashton blurted out. “I actually lost control and nearly hurt you, and I’m really sorry for that. But I felt my body gave up the controlling façade it always kept up. In real life and in bed. You know how I like to be in control and wanting things to work my way so I’d control how much damage I’d do and at the same time protect myself from getting hurt? I forgot all about that just now. Suddenly they didn’t matter. And I’m scared.”

“Scared?” Luke bore his eyes into Ashton’s, brows furrowed in concentration. Like tracing delicate, non-existent constellation between the older boy’s irises. “I get it. For you to give up something you hold dear is really unnerving, but sometimes it’s worth the risk. And this? The best orgasm in your life that you blacked out for a bit? I might seem biased but it’s totally worth the risk.”

The fog was gone. Completely gone. And only then did he notice the fact that Luke had small splash of come on the side of his mouth.

Luke probably swallowed. If Ashton wasn’t so out of it he might’ve been able to watch such an obscene sight, or at least remember when he actually came.

Ashton found himself demanding under his breath, “Can I kiss you?” because;

                1. He wanted to lick the cum out of Luke’s mouth and suck on those sinful lips.

                2. Of course he wanted to avoid further embarrassment.

                3. Just because.

Luke let forth a small chuckle before leaning down to seal their lips together. Ashton was quick to explore the entirety of Luke’s mouth, tasting the remains of his best orgasm. Luke’s fingers were suddenly in his hair, tugging lightly to match the rhythm of their pressing lips. Fucking hell, at this rate Ashton might as well get hard again in a matter of minutes.

Ashton licked the broken syllables out of Luke’s mouth, breathing the scent of his sweat and eagerness. He found himself swallowing the moans that barely make out of Luke’s throat.

He kissed Luke with such desperation and fervour as if the entire universe was spinning so wildly and Luke was the centre of his universe. The only thing that kept him grounded, the only thing that kept his sanity in check. The only thing that mattered.

Fuck, Luke Hemmings is Ashton’s universe. The entire cosmos and even the planetary bodies in between.

Luke was beautiful. He is the most beautiful thing in the world, Ashton thought. Blue eyes soft like Ashton’s childhood blanket, but shine like the kind of stars that you could see in the light of day. Lips red like rose petals at its freshest. Luke is beautiful when he was this close to him. Luke is beautiful when he is across the room. Luke is beautiful when they’re on stage together and Luke is beautiful when they fall asleep in different countries.

Until the day it rains asteroids, Ashton will still think Luke is the most beautiful thing in the universe.

Luke was the one who broke the kiss, pulling away and chuckling into Ashton’s mouth. His light-hearted laugh was contagious, like a disease Ashton didn’t mind catching. He joined the breathy chuckles, watching as Luke scooted closer and lowered his body slightly so he was lying by Ashton’s side. His lanky, clothed body was pressed against Ashton’s naked physique.

He let Luke twine his fingers with his, the younger’s pinkie playing with the hairband around Ashton’s wrist.

And then Ashton remembered something about elephants.

“Why’d you ignore my calls?”

Ashton could see how Luke’s fingers froze at their spot on his inner wrist. He could feel the sudden shift in the air, and maybe it was because they suddenly stopped sharing the same oxygen due to the fact that Luke seemed to stop breathing altogether.

“Luke?” He brought his hand to tilt Luke’s head so he could see the pair of eyes that made him believe Luke Hemmings is a star that was reincarnated into human form.

Luke leaned into the touch, his beard tickling Ashton’s palm subtly. Scratch the star thing. Luke Hemmings is secretly a cat.

He found himself chuckling fondly at the sight of this dork of a boy. “Don’t tell me lame excuses like you exchanged bodies with a Siamese cat that plans to take over the world because you know I nearly believed you that one time.”

Luke’s cherubic giggle sent a puff of air across Ashton’s face that sent his curls flying to the side, and Ashton knew he was so gone for this boy when he found himself praying that he could die in a hurricane of the same gust of air. “What if I lie to you, though?”

“You know I’ll believe you,” Ashton remarked, trying to sound playful but all that came out was unmasked seriousness.

Luke could sense it too, because Ashton could see his Adam’s apple bobbing as he gulped almost cartoon-ishly, breath still warm against Ashton’s face. “I’m not gonna lie, Ashton. You know I won’t.”

Ashton nodded. He felt like kissing Luke’s forehead, so that was exactly what he did. He let his hand travel to the back of Luke’s head and pulled him down, attaching his lips to the younger lad’s forehead.

“I’ve been playing Xbox.”

Ashton snorted. “You tweeted that, so I know.”

Chuckling, Luke replied, “So yeah, that’s the reason. I just didn’t feel like talking to people.”

“That can’t be it.”

“But that is it.”

“Luke,” Ashton sighed.

“Ashton.”

“Luuuuuke…”

“Ashtoooon…”

Ashton shoved the other lad, enough to actually make a point of his seriousness. He is not a violent person, hence the light shoving, but Luke’s childishness was beginning to eat at his nerves that he might accidentally put extra force into the action.

“Ow.”

“Serve you right. I’m here being all serious and you’re acting like a child.” Ashton could feel his facial expression hardening.

“I’m not the one who shoved me. How can I be the childish one?”

“You’re seriously accusing me of being childish now?”

“Well, it’s only fair. You’re the one being pushy here, in both senses,” Luke retorted, emphasized by the roll of his eyes.

“Fuck,” Ashton brought his hand towards the bridge of his nose, pinching it frustratingly. “Are we really having this argument right now?”

Luke was quick to sit himself up. “You’re the one who started it.”

“Me?!” Ashton sat bolt upright, so quickly that his head throbbed with the abrupt motion. “You’re the one being all secretive –”

“I didn’t say it before because I thought you’ll get it but no, you don’t get it.” Luke snapped, blue irises hardening like ice on winter’s coldest days. “So I’ll say it now – leave it.”

“Leave it?”

“Yes, fucking leave it!” Luke yelled.

And to say Ashton was taken aback by the outburst was an understatement. Luke never yelled at him. Luke is the most soft-spoken, one who would reason an argument with calmness and a tad bit of firmness in his voice. But Luke had yelled. Maybe Ashton had crossed yet another line.

Luke was sighing as he ran his bony fingers through his blonde mess of a hair, teeth gnawing restlessly at his lip. There was a pregnant silent in the air of the room, the kind that one anticipates to burst any minute.

The only sound filling the room was the rustling of the sheets as Ashton subconsciously scooted towards the edge of the bed. His body was telling him to take a break and leave the suffocating space. It was as if the walls were threatening to close in on him, squeeze him with guilt and frustration. It was as if the air itself might betray him and ring its hands around his neck and he has to leave before it all happens.

He let his feet dangle at the edge of the bed, not trusting them to support his weight just yet. Cut him some slack – he still felt slightly boneless from the mind-blowing orgasm he experienced a short while ago.

“Ash,” he heard Luke’s broken sigh, followed by tentative fingers brushing against the skin of his inner arm. “I didn’t mean to yell at you. I’m sorry.”

Ashton wanted to croak out an ‘It’s okay’ because maybe, just maybe, it actually is okay. He was never one to sulk over trivial things. But he was never one to be overwhelmed by deep-throating before but look where they were. He concluded that it was the stress of work finally getting to him.

He did not trust his throat, so he chose to stay silent. A small nod in Luke’s direction was enough, in his opinion.

He needed to get up, clean himself up and maybe put some fucking clothes on. That’d be a good start. He’d decide what he will do next later.

Ashton went to stand up when he heard Luke mumbling under his breath.

“I’m sorry, what?” He spun around slightly, enough to meet Luke’s face once again.

There was yet another sigh. “I said, I love you.”

Ashton froze. He could feel his muscles hardening, rendering him motionless at the edge of the bed. Maybe even his heart stop beating for a couple of seconds, fearing its noise was too loud that Ashton might miss the next words that stumble out of Luke’s mouth.

Luke raised his head so their eyes could meet. “That was why I didn’t call you. It just… It crossed my mind and it took me days to figure this out. Fuck, not days. Weeks, probably months. But three days ago it hit me hard. It hit me real and it hit me hard. I do, love you.”

He was afraid to release his breath. By holding his breath it made him feel like he had everything together, firmly sewn at the seams. Spine straightened, façade unaffected. If he released his breath maybe everything will fall apart before him and everything will take the worst turns. Maybe it’d turn out this was all just a dream and he could not have that.

Not when the final piece of his self-made galaxy had finally fallen into place.

Not when everything he’d wanted – for him to know he wasn’t the only one struggling with something more than affection towards his fuck buddy – finally came true.

Cheesy as hell, he’d admit that, but he’s a man with feelings. He knew from the start of this ‘friends-with-benefits’ thing that feelings would surface between them. Fuck, he even expected the feeling to become a wall that will put them apart, like a wall of crystallized air materializing along with their respective confessions.

Back then he was scared.

And he wasn’t any less scared at the moment.

Panic began to dance on Luke’s features. His eyebrows began weaving with one another in middle, lips pursing in desperation.

He was waiting for a reply. Okay, fuck.

“I—” Ashton stopped himself. His brain worked through the jumble of thoughts as he tried to construct a sentence that made sense. His mouth betrayed him and spurted an enquiry instead, “Are you – like, sure?”

Luke’s chuckle was nervous. It didn’t send sparks into his eclipsed eyes, but enough to pull his lips to the sides. “Yeah. I’m sure. I love you.”

The three words seemed to punch Ashton in the chest. He had no choice but to push a ragged breath out of his chest. Shoulders slumped, but he realized it wasn’t out of defeat.

Maybe it was relief. Maybe it was the ‘I’m not the only one’ fact finally hitting him square between the eyes.

“Oh, uhm,” he stammered. “I lo – fuck, I mean, like, thank you.”

He should’ve said it back, he knew. He could see it the way the corner of Luke’s mouth twitched, the ice in his eyes breaking and leaving them looking all glassy in the dim light. He should’ve said it back.

But he was unsure. He knew he felt something for Luke and it was more than just fondness, but did it rival to Luke’s ‘love’? What if all Ashton had felt was just affection? Lust?

“It’s okay, you know,” Luke said. “I didn’t expect you to return the words. I said I love you because I want you to know. I don’t want to stress you out with it or anything.”

“No, I get it. I just,” Ashton sighed, running his fingers through his sweaty curls. “I feel something too. I wanna think it’s love but I don’t wanna jump in too soon, you know? I can be wrong. I’d rather not tell those words to you if I’m unsure, compared to if I tell you that now, only to realize in the future that I never felt that way.”

Luke nodded, biting the insides of his lip. “Okay.”

“Okay?”

Luke laughed. “Yeah.”

“Wow. Never thought it’d be this easy.”

“It’s not. At least it looks easy, right now. But it won’t be easy in the future.”

“Then let’s not worry about the future.” New-found assurance surged through him, and Ashton himself didn’t know where it had come from. “Let’s just focus on right now. This very moment. Not a lot’s gonna change between us right? We’re still best friends.”

“Are you friend-zoning me?”

Ashton swatted the back of Luke’s head lightly. “No, silly. I’m saying that if we’re comfortable the way we are right now, let’s just continue this. If it’s to change, let it change. But that’s for later.”

“Later? How much later?” Luke’s lips were starting to part into a smirk, eyes now glowing like melted galaxies.

Ashton hummed, pretending to contemplate. “At least until tomorrow morning.”

It was met by Luke’s chuckle. “What do you suggest we do in the meantime?”

A smirk was drawing a line across his lips. Ashton turned his body and leaned to whisper into Luke’s ear, “We were fighting five minutes ago and now we’re doing dirty talk again?”

Fingers were quick to find his hair, caressing, pulling. He could feel Luke’s breath against his ear, warm with arousal. “Well excuse me if I’m looking forward to some real sex. I’m the only other person in the room that still hasn’t come. My dick’s gonna fall off, I’m so fucking hard right now.”

Right. What a selfish sex partner Ashton is. If he wasn’t currently flushed red with embarrassment he would’ve rolled his own eyes at himself.

“So, what do you say, Mr. Irwin?”

Ashton blinked, unsure.

He wanted to return the favour, of course, he wasn’t that bad of a sex partner. But currently he was such an emotional wreck and his limbs were somewhat rickety and there’s cum between his thighs.

Hopefully, Luke’s hard-on would be able to wait for another couple of hours.

Ashton let his left hand travel to his own hair, twining his fingers with Luke’s. Pulling them away from his head, he offered, “Let me finish my shower then I’ll tend to your cock.” He leaned even closer to Luke’s ear to whisper the next part of his sentence, “With both my hands and mouth. Maybe if you’re a good boy…”

He could see the lust swallowing Luke’s cerulean irises, eager and desirous. Slowly, he brought their interlocked hands behind Luke. He released the calloused digits in order to dip that of his own into the back of Luke’s still-undone jeans. Gripping the flesh firmly, Ashton found himself pleased by the whimper released into his ear.

“… maybe I’ll pay attention to some other parts of you.”

Luke’s groan and Ashton’s chuckle amalgamated, right before the older lad swiftly stood up to make a dash towards the bathroom.

He didn’t succeed of course. Or else there wouldn’t have been a story to tell.

(Luke caught him by the waist before he could even break into a run. He was spun around almost dramatically before there were kisses to his mouth and kisses to his neck. Kisses to his erection and kisses to fleshiest part of his thighs.

And it was the first time in months that the kisses were given without asking for permission first.

They were hesitant before. But they weren’t so hesitant now.

And Ashton knew then, that even in another galaxy Luke would still be his gravity.)

***

They ended up on the balcony chair outside not even an hour later, words breathed into each other’s mouth, moans pushed out of their lungs into the quiet night air. Ashton was seeing stars everywhere – in Luke’s star-like irises, in Luke’s galaxy-black pupils.

Luke tried to talk him into fucking against the balcony’s railing, pointing that they were too high up to be seen by people on the streets. (“Besides, it’s like 1 in the morning. No one’s gonna actually look up to find out if two men are having gay sex on a hotel balcony, Ashton.”)

Of course Luke is a fucking exhibitionist. And of course Ashton would say no. (“I’m not gay, Luke.”)

One thing led to another and Luke ended up fingering Ashton against the railing. He only began undressing during their little game of foreplay just before that, and Ashton took the opportunity to steal the lad’s red flannel.

He knew Luke usually love it most when Ashton is naked during sex, but Luke was quick to compliment how good he looked in the shirt. Personally Ashton thought it was too big on him and he was only using it to spare himself the remains of his dignity in case someone walked in on them but. Luke’s words of compliment were exceptional tonight, so the shirt stayed on.

And now there they were, with Luke sitting on the balcony chair and Ashton sitting on Luke’s cock. The flannel had draped down one of his shoulders and Luke was attacking the sliver of exposed skin – kissing, sucking and biting. They couldn’t give a fuck about marks now, only the high of their bodies melting together.

Ashton threw his head back, the pleasure sending his nerves into explosions. Eyes half-lidded, fixed on the night sky. He let his jaw fall slack to allow grunts and moan to crawl out of his chest. He maintained the figure-eight movements of his hips on Luke’s, rolling slowly against one another. It was a rare thing for their sex sessions to turn all vanilla and sensual, but Ashton likes it most when that happens. So he savoured the moment, despite the nagging at the back of his mind and the screams of his filthy desires inside.

He focused on the somewhat calm feeling, eyes fixed on the inky skies. There were stars above them, hidden behind the reddish tint blanketing Los Angeles’ midnight sky. There was a star beneath him now, and fuck he was so lucky to have one right here so close to him.

There was a shaky whimper released against the skin of his neck. Luke stopped his violent assaults on Ashton’s neck before pulling his mouth away.

“Fuck,” Luke muttered, voice deep and hoarse and just fucking wrecked. “God you’re so pretty like this Ash.”

A strand of hair fell into his eyes as his and Luke’s hips jostled together once again. His hands quickly found its way to Luke’s broad shoulder, seeking balance and reassurance. Luke was there. Luke would ground him. Bring him back to Earth.

There was a pleasured grunt from Luke before he croaked, “How come I’m still the one who’s proper wrecked when you’re the one with a dick inside you?”

Ashton brought his gaze back down, back to his pretty star whose pupils were blown out and face a canvas painted by pleasure. There were little beads of tears at the edge of his eyes and his lips red and swollen and obscene and Ashton knew he was gone.

Somehow it made his chest swell with pride. He was the only who got to see Luke this wrecked, this desperate. He was the only one who got him into such a state. He got to see Luke at his most vulnerable, most beautiful.

He hoped the day it rains asteroids never came, because he didn’t want to stop thinking how beautiful Luke really is.

“It’s a skill that takes months to master, Mr Hemmings,” he managed with a breathy laugh that was cut short when Luke tilted his hips upwards, cock hitting the bundle of nerves inside Ashton that reminded him of the supernova effect again. But fuck, this is probably better by a hundred-fold because the drag of Luke’s cock against his insides did not just send his brain going haywire but he was pretty sure he can hear the screams of his bones, the reaction in every cell and feel every single one of his synapse connecting and suddenly everything was at its clearest even though his brain is at its haziest.

It made him believe anything is possible. Ridiculous things, like falling off the galaxy’s edge and keeping his favourite stars in a jar. Luke Hemmings makes him believe impossible shit.

Ashton was pretty sure he had some kind of a dazed smile drawn onto his lips, because Luke was looking back at him with his eyebrows knitted and lips pulled up in a fond smirk.

“What?”

Ashton shook his head, smile never leaving his mouth, hips never stopping its frantic swivels against Luke’s. “I just–”

 Luke hit the spot again and Ashton had to close his eyes and groan because fuck that felt fucking good.

“I can’t compliment you on your fucking skills if you keep doing that.”

Luke did that again and Ashton had expected that this time. What he didn’t expect was the throaty whine that escaped his lips.

He did not need to open his eyes to know Luke had that goddamn asshole smirk on his face. And he was proven correct when Luke snapped his hips even harder and sent Ashton’s limbs flailing and his eyes flying open.

God if Luke wasn’t trying to fuck him into another galaxy maybe Ashton would’ve smacked the cocky smirk right off the younger’s face.

Cocky Luke was a pleasant sight every other time, but right now it’s setting the skin of Ashton’s face on fire. Wanting to look anywhere but at a fucking smirking, cocky-faced Luke Hemmings before him, Ashton decided to throw his head back and look up at the heavens again.

Luke must’ve traced Ashton’s line of vision because the next thing he said was, “Stop looking at the sky. Look at me.”

Whilst Luke Hemmings in bed is a very confident Luke Hemmings, he is also the most demanding little shit the world has ever known.

When Ashton had chosen to ignore him, the younger lad took things into his own hands – literally – grabbed the older lad by waist in a firm grip before thrusting his hips upwards, merciless and punishing.

His thrusts were strong and precise, hitting Ashton dead-on on the prostate. Ashton could feel the flames licking up his spine, his toes curling at Luke’s sides. Eyes shut tight, focusing on the sensation centred at where both their bodies met.  Luke’s cock kept gliding in and out of him. Pulling out almost all the way only to slam back in, each time harder than the last. Fuck, he could die like this. He wanted to die like this.

“Fuck – fuck Luke!”

He was so close – so fucking close to tipping over the precipice when Luke suddenly stopped his motions.

What. The. Fuck.

Ashton let his eyelids fly open, only to be met with the sight of an even sweatier Luke, hair plastered against his forehead not even successfully curtaining those devilish eyes. He fucking did this on purpose.

“So that’s your punishment for me, because I wasn’t looking at you during sex?” Ashton panted. “Jealous little prick.”

He had expected the fingers in his wavy locks, but never had he expected them to pull on it this rough. But he liked it. A lot.

Luke leaned forward so their chests were pressed together. Ashton could feel the rise and fall of his chest synchronized with that of Luke’s. This moment was more beautiful than they both would like to admit, but he won’t be acknowledging it. Not when Luke was sucking at his neck with a thirst that probably resembled one of a parched traveller in a waterless desert.

The moment there were teeth involved, Ashton was a goner.

The suctions stopped a minute later, replaced by Luke blowing raspberries on the marks he left.

“That’ll teach you not to make me jealous, ever again,” Luke growled against the skin of Ashton’s neck.

On other occasions all this would have been silly, considering the reasons to Luke’s jealousy. But Ashton didn’t care. Tonight he was going to take everything Luke has had to give.

The touch of Luke’s fingers between his ass cheeks was so fleeting Ashton would’ve missed it if he weren’t as sensitive as he currently was. But he felt the feathery touch, the hair on his back standing up as it bowed to the rhythm of Luke’s descend towards his rim. Towards where their bodies met.

There was light pressure against the outer part of his abused, puckered hole. Luke snarled playfully, “And I assure you, my prick’s not little either.”

Luke’s finger ran along Ashton’s rim, teasing with such cruelty Ashton wanted to cry. The finger tried to press its way into his hole and fuck, it was both a threat and a promise. Ashton was surprised to find out the strangled whimper he’d heard half a second later actually came from himself.

The digit began pressing its way inside and holy fuck Ashton could just come from the sole thought of being stretched beyond his limits. As if Luke’s hard cock inside of him wasn’t enough, but Ashton is a greedy boy and he’d always want more.

Then the younger lad retracted everything – his fingers, his lips, his body – away from Ashton, only to lean back against the chair to admire the wreck of a man before him.

Hateful curse words during sex weren’t at all attractive, but somehow it worked for them. It always had, so.

Ashton managed through his teeth, “Fuck you, Luke.”

“After this I’ll give you a round of that.”

“Good. You need to make it up to me for being a stupidly jealous fuck.”

“Yeah unlike someone who’d rather throw people against the wall and screw them really hard when they’re jealous –”

With a dramatic gasp, Ashton retorted, “I thought I remember someone screaming ‘I like it rough’ and ‘Daddy’ in the same sentence?

Oh, an embarrassed Luke Hemmings is a sight so heavenly that it might as well rival the Aurora Borealis, Ashton noted. Right on top of the official list of ‘The Best Look on Luke Hemmings’, coming second right after ‘a fucked out, eyes-glazed-over Luke Hemmings laid spread eagle on the bed with come leaking out of his arse and kiss-bruised-lips and chest marked with hickeys like a map of constellation.

Ashton likes revenge. Revenge is good. It feeds his soul, and his lust, in certain cases. So he was quick to put his feet firm onto edges of the chair and his arms around Luke’s shoulders. If Luke doesn’t want to give him the pleasure he so fucking needs, then fine. He’ll work for it.

His limbs acted as leverage as he began bouncing on Luke’s cock, chasing his impending orgasm. The sound of slapping hips and choked moans mixed in the night air, the temperature rapidly increasing by the minute.

“A – Ash, you feel – so good around me,” Luke groaned out, his fingers digging into the meat of Ashton’s thighs.

The pain of it caused Ashton to clench involuntarily around Luke, but fuck it felt good. It must’ve felt even better on Luke because he flat-out howling, like a wolf would towards the full-moon.

Bullets of sweat rolled down Ashton’s body causing the shirt to stick against his skin but he couldn’t care less. His beautiful boy and his pretty face and pretty moan and flushed-red skin was more important than anything else.

“Fuck Luke,” he managed, “I’m close.”

“God me too.”

It was when Luke thrusted his own hips up to meet the drop of Ashton’s hips that Ashton finally found heaven. It was an unimaginable bliss. It felt like he was shoved into a vacuum space filled with nothing but pleasure. Only pure bliss and pleasure.

He moaned out Luke’s name as he came, shooting globs of spunk on the flannel and Luke’s bare chest. Stars exploded behind his eyelids and planets collided inside his chest.

And it was the sporadic clenches of his hole that sent Luke tumbling over the edge as well, coming with a groan. Ashton could feel the warmth of his partner’s release even through the condom as it spilled into him, and fuck, he felt complete.

It took them a while to come down from their highs, panting into each other’s mouths as they kept pecking at one another’s lips, never getting enough of the other’s taste.

Ashton rested his forehead against Luke’s and let his hand wander towards the nape of his neck, playing with the wisps of fine hair there. He kept staring into Luke’s eyes as if they held stars in them and he was counting them one by one. Some of his hair had managed to tangle themselves into Luke’s eyelashes but he didn’t mind.

Luke was the first to break the silence, muttering into Ashton’s mouth, “Thank you. For the sex. And for everything else.”

Ashton giggled, “You’re welcome.”

They sat tangled in each other’s limbs for a few moments, just savouring in one another’s scent and the remnants of their arousals.

But they can’t stay like this forever. Ashton was starting to feel cold and gross in the ruined flannel. The night was getting colder. And suddenly Ashton remembered the fact that they were actually outside. Fuck. Okay. Someone might have seen them.

He went to lift himself off Luke’s now-flaccid dick, only to be pulled down by the other lad almost instantly.

“Come on Luke, let’s at least get inside and clean up, hmm?”

Luke’s eyes were half-closed, tiredness finally evident on his face. “One sec.”

“Luuuke.”

“Aaash,” the younger even dared to pout, for good measure. Suddenly he looked so young, so innocent, even with the beard. He was still the same Luke Hemmings, no matter which version of him Ashton encounters.

Sighing, Ashton demanded, “At least pull out of me. It’s starting to feel weird.”

Luckily, Luke went with it this time. He pulled out of Ashton slowly; probably aware of the little winces the older lad was letting out involuntarily. Ashton tried to stand but was pulled back down by a pouty Luke demanding cuddles.

And who was Ashton to deny him that?

Ashton managed a frown at the lad when he tossed the condom to the side, despite tying it up for disposal. But they both weren’t in the mood for hygiene lectures, so Ashton let it slide.

The younger tilted his head up slightly, his eyes squinting, tracing the heavens above. “There are not even stars out there –”

Ashton brought his hands to Luke’s jaw because balance be damned, and Luke let the older lad tilted his head so their faces aligned. “—but I have one here.”

It was actually the lyrics to a song they wrote together in Liverpool. They never planned for the rest of the world to hear it. The only other thing that had listened to the whole song was Luke’s iPhone, and they intend to keep it that way now that everything was… slightly different.

But the song would always mean the same to them. It meant the words the sighed only into each other’s mouths. It meant the things they cared about but never showed they did. It meant the late night hunts for strawberry shortcakes and double shot espressos. It meant the silent nights under the stars, no matter if they can see them or not.

Cheesy motherfuckers, they are.

Ashton found himself leaning onto Luke’s chest. The younger was quick to wrap his octopus arms around Ashton, pulling him even closer. He rested his head on Luke’s shoulder, face pressed into the top of his chest.

People of the old days find comfort and assurance in the worship of stars. Ashton found comfort in the arms of Luke, his personal little star. His eyes probably borrowed the blue from the brightest stars. He thanked whatever deity that created Luke Hemmings for his DNA and spontaneity and lovingness and basically his entire existence.

There was a kiss pressed into his hairline before he fell asleep.

And suddenly Ashton wasn’t a derailed comet anymore.

***

(When they woke up two hours later because the night got a little dewy and they need the comfort of a proper bed, they were still half asleep.

Luke was the one who stumbled inside the hotel room, with Ashton trudging behind, yawning sleepily.

And then there was a surprised yelp and a loud thud. Followed by a low grunt of ‘Fuck.’

Because of course, stupid, clumsy-arse, two-left-feet-that-go-on-for-fifteen-kilometres Luke Hemmings was on the floor, limbs sprawled helpless at his side because he managed to fucking slip on the puddle of water in front of the bathroom.

Which, serve him the fuck right, because Ashton had warned the idiot about getting bubble bath water all the floor and now the kid had managed to slip.

And it’s been hours and the water hadn’t even dried yet what the fuck?

Ashton didn’t know whether to laugh his own arse off or scold Luke for pretending the room was a McDonald’s playground and making a dash towards the bathroom.

But he was still half-asleep and there were silent sniffles from where Luke was lying on the floor that he decided against both.

Instead he waddled towards the (possibly) crying boy and just lied down beside him. He gathered Luke into his arms and cuddled him close. There’ll be some serious bruise on Luke’s backside by the morning, but add that to the list of things that’d be waiting for them in the morning.)