Work Text:
Cartman and Kenny sat cross-legged across from each other on Kenny's bed, going over hastily scrawled-out plans in Cartman's notebook. It wasn't the best place of operations, but Kenny's living room was occupied, and Cartman's house was most certainly out of the question.
"Okay… I was thinking we follow in Casa Bonita's footsteps here and make this more of an experience than anything. There will be a slide over here, a fountain over here…" Cartman went on, pointing to his shoddy sketches with his pencil.
"'An experience?' For a hot dog stand?" Kenny asked with a quirk of his brow.
"Kenny, you gotta trust the process. When have I ever steered you wrong?" Cartman brought his hands together to gesture to Kenny, who simply remained silent for a moment. "See? The fact that you didn't answer that question is exactly why you're the one I've invited to join me on this venture. Now, if we do the whole Casa Bonita thing here, we're bound to make like… millions of dollars, because everybody knows Casa Bonita is rolling in cash with how awesome it is."
"Well, I'm totally with you on the 'millions of dollars' thing." Kenny nodded along.
"Yeah, and with your 20%, you can finally buy yourself some decent clothes. I mean, fuck, within our first quarter, you could probably afford to move out of this shithole." Cartman gave an amused huff.
"…Yeah?" Kenny's eyes widened just a bit, and he blinked a couple of times.
"I mean, of course, obviously. What, wasn't your whole, like, goal at some point to ditch this place with your sister or whatever?" Cartman shrugged.
"…Yeah." Kenny just stared at Cartman, lowering his voice in slight awe as he genuinely pictured the prospect for the first time, outside of just imagining blowing the money on material goods.
"Well, with my expertise, you could totally-" Without warning, Kenny lunged forward and cupped Cartman's cheeks, mashing their lips together on impulse. After a lingering moment, Kenny pulled away, leaving the two looking each other in the eye for a second, with Cartman appearing deeply confused.
"…Shit. Sorry." Kenny quickly pulled back. "…Just... got caught up in the moment. Continue." He cleared his throat and looked away with embarrassment at his little outburst.
“…No… no, no, no, no… I'm not letting you get away with that one that easily." Cartman smirked. "Kenny, the fuck was that?" He snickered.
"I told you! I got caught up in the moment!" Kenny scoffed. "It was 100% just the money talking." He grumbled.
"No, no. You wanna make out with me." Cartman simply kept a smug look on his face.
"I do not! Jesus Christ, dude." Kenny huffed.
"Yooooooou wanna make out with me! Yoooooou wanna make out with me!" Cartman spoke in a sing-songy voice, getting closer and wiggling his finger in Kenny's face, tormenting him.
Kenny furrowed his brow, unamused, and grabbed Cartman's wrist to pull his hand out of his personal space. He got up in Cartman's face, just trying to show that he wasn't finding this funny. "Dude." He simply replied.
"Aww, getting up all close so you can kiss me again? Honestly, I'm actually like, really honored that you-" With that, Kenny kissed him again, almost solely to shut him up. Really, he was closest with Cartman since the guy had perhaps the best perspective on who Kenny was as a person, but that really wasn't saying much, and that didn't mean he didn't need to shut the fuck up sometimes. Cartman gave a single amused hum against his lips, but shockingly reciprocated. Were they… actually doing this? The whole making-out thing? Was that what Cartman was getting at? He had a way of saying one thing but meaning another; Kenny couldn't really tell if he was just down for the prospect this entire time or just happy he was right. Either way, Kenny didn't back down. It was all just the moment talking. He'd never do something like this under any other circumstances. He'd done pretty ungodly things when enough money was waved in his face, but with the way Cartman had been talking, he was feeling something. Not for Cartman. Dear god, he hoped it wasn't for Cartman.
After a few more kisses, Cartman's hands went for Kenny's ass, urging him into his lap. Kenny tensed with a stiff inhale at the touch, not expecting it, but he obliged. This wasn't about Cartman. He wasn't thinking about Cartman. He was just feeling out the moment. All the sensations associated with it were simply due to the excitement he felt about what was to come. That was his story, and he was sticking to it. He shifted his legs to straddle Cartman's lap, lazily resting his arms around his neck as Cartman seemed content to keep his hands on his ass, giving it a little squeeze once he had moved and chuckling against his lips. He was absolutely, 100% fucking with him. It was, like, a really weird way of fucking with him, going through with the 'making out with him' thing. Cartman did that sometimes, doing really gay shit for the sake of affirming that other people were gay. Kenny was absolutely certain Cartman would push this as far as Kenny would go for the sake of holding it against him later, even though Cartman was the one escalating things. Kenny didn't really care right now. The stimulation was nice, regardless of who it was coming from. Kenny couldn't recall the last time someone grabbed his ass and meant it. It wasn't about Cartman, though.
Cartman pulled his hips in tight as he urged his tongue between Kenny's lips, affirming Kenny's prediction that Cartman would escalate things for the sake of laughing at Kenny over later for being so into Cartman that he totally wanted his tongue down his throat. At least, Kenny hoped that was his motive here… it was kind of the lesser of two evils. He didn't know if he could handle the idea of Cartman legitimately being into him. Still… the physicality of the moment was distinctly a non-Cartman thing to Kenny. He parted his lips and met tongues with the bastard, tightening his arms around his neck a little more. Cartman took over, as he had been, quick to aggressively twine tongues with Kenny. Kenny let out a small, inadvertent noise at Cartman's actions, completely subconsciously. He hated that it slipped out because it was more fuel for Cartman to rip on him later… though Cartman absolutely rolled with it in the moment. He urged his hips upward and guided Kenny against him with the grip he had on his ass, encouraging him to grind with him. Another escalation, but he seemed convinced that Kenny was horny enough to want to seek gratification that way just by the little noise he let out.
He was right, but he was a major fucking asshole for it.
Kenny began slowly rutting against Cartman as he wrestled tongues with him, with Cartman guiding his actions and bucking up against him. Kenny let out a slow whine against his lips, perhaps from the embarrassment, perhaps from the stimulation, as he moved his hips a little faster. He was certainly one to seek gratification, and Cartman was not just offering it but actively encouraging it. This was, no doubt, sad and desperate… but fuck if the thought of the money didn't make him want to make out with the person offering it just a little, fuck him for that thought. It wasn't Cartman as a person. He had to keep telling himself that. It was the money. It was the moment. Fuck did this feel good. It was getting to him.
It was really, really getting to him, emotionally… and physically.
He soon had to pull away from the kiss to focus on his frantic movements, hiding his face against Cartman's shoulder as he ground against him. "Fuck…" Kenny huffed out breathlessly. Cartman was quick to squeeze his ass and pull his hips in close, stopping him. Cartman could, no doubt, feel just how hard he was against him from this position… though all Kenny could think about was how, just for a moment, perfectly content he would've been getting off like that and letting Cartman rip on him for the rest of his life. Fuck, he was in deep.
"Jesus, Kenny. You're a horny fuck, aren't you?" Cartman spoke, reminding Kenny of his place in this interaction. "Well, we can't have you this distracted while we're working, now, can we?" He spoke teasingly as he urged Kenny back against the bed.
Kenny fell back against the bed with a huff, arms resting beside his head, and felt Cartman draw his hands along his thighs with a shudder. Cartman was right about the whole being distracted thing. He'd definitely be pretty fidgety if he didn't at least excuse himself. Still, this was a hefty escalation from just kissing him. Cartman teased his fingers along Kenny's waistband, and Kenny took in a sharp inhale at the insinuation, before snapping back to reality for just a moment. "Maybe we should get back to the… thing," Kenny spoke, raising his head a bit to look at Cartman.
Cartman brought his hand down to grope Kenny's clothed erection, firmly palming it through his pants. "Hmm?" His tone was still so coy.
"Mmm…" Kenny dropped his head and threw on a lazy smirk as he rolled his hips up against Cartman's hand for more stimulation. "Keep going." He murmured.
"Yeah, s'what I thought." Cartman snickered as he hitched Kenny's pants and underwear down, fully exposing his cock. His hand drifted to it with no hesitation, wrapping around the base and giving him a few slow strokes. With how turned on he was, but how little Cartman was holding back, Kenny really couldn't keep tabs on who the 'gay' one was in all of this. He just closed his eyes with a lazy smile as Cartman stroked his cock, taking in the stimulation and the stimulation alone. His cock got stroked multiple times a day, sure, but it was definitely nice to have somebody else doing it.
Kenny gave a few pleased hums under his breath as Cartman moved faster, occasionally giving an inadvertent buck of his hips, causing Cartman to attempt to hold him down with his free hand. "Jesus, Kenny… I know I said you're a horny fuck, but calm down." Cartman snickered.
"Dude, I would literally rail you at this point. Shut up and finish me off." Kenny huffed out, attempting to buck his hips once more.
"Okay, I don't like your tone there… but if either of us is doing the railing, it's me." Cartman scoffed as he stroked Kenny faster.
"Mmm…" Kenny tipped his head to the side. "Yeah, rail me. Fuck my face. Pull my hair. Call me trash. I don't give a fuck." He whined.
Cartman slowly stopped, a stunned expression on his face." Dude… you got issues." He mumbled.
"I've got a far more extensive porn collection than you, dude. Don't hate the player for being into some weird shit, hate the game for putting weird shit out there." Kenny glared up at Cartman for stopping and pointed at him accusingly.
"That sounds like some major issues… and 'issues' in the pun sense since you go the vintage route with your shit," Cartman replied with an amused huff.
"The more you rip on me, the further you get away from 'doing the railing," Kenny stated as he shifted over to his nightstand drawer, digging around through sex toys of varying sizes and uses for a bottle of lube to toss Cartman's way.
Cartman caught it, blinking a couple of times. "I was, like, seriously just fucking around but… fuck…" He dropped his hesitation and yanked Kenny's pants the rest of the way off before he coated his fingers in lube. It was really hard to keep up the act when Kenny was playing into it this much. Cartman wasn't sure if Kenny was trying to regain power by trying to make him uncomfortable or genuinely, like, overwhelmingly kinky.
He hitched Kenny's thigh up with his free hand to place one finger against his hole, tracing it for a moment before slowly rocking it inside of it. Kenny let out a shuddered sigh, tipping his head back against the pillow. Cartman worked him with just one for a moment before switching to two, mostly on autopilot, and while Kenny was trying to relax into his touch, he opted to quickly slam his fingers against his sweet spot, earning a sharp moan from him. Kenny's eyes were closed, but he could hear Cartman snickering at him, and he was pretty happy not to see the look on his face on that one.
Cartman slowly retracted his fingers and hitched his own pants down before he coated his own cock in lube, hard from everything thus far, though that something he wasn't necessarily thinking about too terribly much, then pressed it against Kenny's hole. He gripped his thighs as he began to slide himself in, earning another shaken sigh from Kenny. "Fuck…" Kenny huffed and opened an eye for just a moment, peering up to see that it was Cartman above him. This was most definitely an eyes-closed encounter. He closed it again as Cartman worked his cock further and further inside, causing Kenny to shudder. Cartman began slowly rocking his hips with a small huff, taking in the sensation for himself. All of this, up until this point, had been just to poke fun at Kenny for being so totally into him, but this directly involved him… and it felt pretty fucking good to be on this end of things. It wasn't about Kenny, though. It was still about proving what a horny little shit he was.
Kenny breathed slowly as Cartman rocked in and out of him at a steady pace. He huffed, gripping his fists, then loosening them. "C'mon, that all you got?" He chuckled.
"Jesus, I know you're a slut, but I got no idea how many other dudes been railing you here. Didn't wanna fuck you up or anything. Calm down." Cartman scoffed and gripped Kenny's thighs tighter to slam into him once, hopefully to get him to stop interjecting like a horny little bitch every two seconds. That drew a shaken moan out of him, which was distinctly not some weird kinky shit, so Cartman was pretty pleased with himself. He worked faster, picking up his pace and giving a harsh buck every so often, earning a drawn-out moan from Kenny as he tipped his head back against the pillow. The sight was… kinda hot? It wasn't Kenny, though. It was 100% Cartman's ego.
Cartman gripped Kenny's exposed thighs tighter, digging his nails into them as he fucked him harder, earning longer streams of moans from him. The sound went straight to Cartman's dick… though it was 100% his ego again. Cartman huffed as he railed him while Kenny didn't hold back with the noises he made, a perfectly content smile on his face. His noises rose in volume, and he arched his back as he came with a final sharp moan. Cartman wasn't far behind him with a final harsh buck, finishing with a long, shaken sigh.
"Fuck…" Cartman huffed as he pulled out. "Alright, cool. If we install bathrooms nearby, let's make a note to have some sort of protocol to make sure nobody's fucking in them." He spoke as he gestured to the now crumpled-up notebook beside them on the bed, hitching his pants back up as he tried to change the subject. If he was gonna make fun of Kenny for being gay for this, it was probably gonna be when he was no longer reeling from having just fucked him.
"Pssh, you wanna go back to work?" Kenny spoke low and was only slightly shaken as he sat up. He shifted close to Cartman and hooked an arm around his neck to kiss him once more; this time, Kenny was the aggressor.
"Dude, we just fucked." Cartman stated after pulling back from the kiss, squinting at him.
"Yeah, and? You don't wanna know how many times I get off in a day. I'm good, dude. What, you can't rebound or something?" Kenny chuckled.
"No, we just got important business to attend to… also, you're being a horny weirdo again." Cartman looked him up and down.
"Yooooou can't rebound! Yooooou can't rebound!" Kenny pointed his finger in Cartman's face teasingly. Cartman furrowed his brow at him and grabbed a fistful of his hair to give it a harsh tug, causing Kenny to moan softly, then leaned in to kiss along his neck.