Chapter Text
Jamie had a cool head, he was wise. he grew up nice, happy married parents, comfortable financially, lots of cousins and extended family. he still felt something missing inside of him though. when he was younger, he killed small animals- he eventually stopped when he discovered how much he actually liked drugs at 19, the alcohol and coke kept him sane enough.
he probably had bipolar 1, although he didn't know what that was and had never been diagnosed. jamie had several years long episodes in between several month long episodes, and during a shorter episode, he was in a trap house upstairs, cutting for some guys that were snorting lines far too chunky for jamie to just ignore and not help out with. and then a girl walked in kinda fucked up, hair messy and a small amount of powder around her left nostril.
Jamie saw her walk in, gave a nod up to her as he would with guys, and she did the same back as she sat down on the bed with them.
as he finished cutting their lines, ridiculously long fat lines that they kept requesting him to cut.
"wanna line?" jamie asked the girl, not looking up at her.
"please, hon." she responded quietly.
he tap-poured a smaller line out for her, and she silently took the card out of his hand and cut her portion in half, sliding half off the slab of mirror onto the back of her hand. he took the card back, watching her now as she wiped up a large amount on her finger and tilted her head back to coat the part of her mouth under her tongue. the rest of it went onto her gums, and once she had enough of that she put her face to her hand and took the small bump that was left.
Jamie looked at her in amazement, because, even though he wasnt doing lines right now (tolerance break) she did coke very similarly to him, and he'd not met anyone yet that did it like them.
he didn't say anything else, or expressed anything on his face or with body language that said he was impressed at all. he just finished her line and got up to go back downstairs, he had a party to pay for and he'd been up here for a long time, and suddenly she was grabbing his hand, wiping powder off her upper lip. with surprising force, she pulled him back down to her and put her thumb right under his nostril. he didn't see coke on it and she didn't say anything so he inhaled along with his natural breathing, and caught a fat bump on accident. he yelped and threw his head back, knowing that no matter how much he didn't wanna take that bump that he shouldn't waste it or he'd have to pay for it. the drip happened right after, he knew just how to inhale to get it over with.
he felt the rush, felt the need.
neither of them needed to talk to each other after that. he sat back down with her, not noticing the bedroom emptying. she silently gestured to the bag the guys left, and he handed it to her with the card.
as she started to cut some, maybe half a gram was out on the mirror. she put everything onto the mirror and gently sat it down, as jamie watched curiously.
he was already sitting against the headboard, and he had his arms up resting on his knees. she pushed his knees down, and sat in between his legs with her back resting on his chest. she reached out and pulled the mirror back, and after she settled it he pulled his arms around her chest and she leaned into him for a split second before leaning her head back up to look at what she was doing.
he enjoyed this embrace, knowing he was about to do several lines for the first time in weeks made it better but he was almost sure he liked holding her just as much. she was naturally cold, cold hands and feet, nose and ears. he was warm. and they melted together like this, her lifting the mirror to him and handing him the straw every so often.
he pulled a hand off her chest to put it in her hair, and he rested his chin on her head. she lifted the mirror up and felt him shake his head, obeying his mind's limit. she brought it back down until she hit her limit, and she closed off the bag and gummed the residue on the mirror.
she set it on the floor this time, snuggling up into his chest into a ball against him, knees and elbows rubbing onto his stomach and crotch.
he felt a heat there, in his stomach. he slid them both down on the bed so they were laying down, and he moved her kinda limp now body so she was laying on top of his proper.
mind clouded with haze, with want and need and so much coke, he started grinding against her stomach with his bulge.
she spoke for the first time in several hours, quiet and soft, like she felt the need to whisper or else not to disturb him, "cum in your jeans for me baby, you can use me." still not moving, still on top of him.
he shuddered and grabbed her waist forcefully, bringing her pretty body up far enough for him to grind the head of his cock onto her pussy, going slow using her as she so politely asked.
she let out a soft whine at him, and it took all of him not to cum right then. he was determined to be quiet, not to moan or anything like that. he gently started rutting into her more aggressively, had intentions of teasing her and then not caring as he realized how close he was. in a swift motion she had his cock in her hand, and she reached down to jerk him properly. he groaned lowly in her ear, and felt her smile against his chest.
she whispered, even quieter than before, "are you ready?"
he let out a "huh?" mixed with a low moan as she pushed her thumb down hard sliding over the slit of his cock.
"ohhoh ffuck-" his body felt hot, his hands everywhere on her reaching for any contact as his mind went blank with pleasure and "holyshitidontevenknowhername" type thoughts.
she jerked him waaaay slow after he came, overstimulating him a little bit. she put him back in his jeans and buttoned and zipped the fly with care, and gently brought her panties back up her thighs. she sighed deeply, and brought his knees up again so she was straddling him. they hugged, as if same wavelength of thought, and sat together as close as possible for as long as possible.
chap 2 mayb
after that night, the two were an inseparable couple. he learned her name, may.
"my-uh?" he whispered to himself, looking at the text message.
he recorded a voice note, and awkwardly said "uh, like.. my-uh? or is it may-uh, like its spelled?"
the bubbles had disappeared, and he realized a few minutes into the silence of his car that he probably should stop staring at the screen. he shook his head and put the phone in his back pocket, trading for his cigarettes and lighter. he turned in the drivers seat, leaning his back against the driverside door and bending his knees over the center console. as he lit a cigarette, he thought about how kind she'd been to him. he wondered why, it had been a long time. he didnt think he was very attractive, about 5'10, palest white with bright blonde hair and more gray than blue eyes, very lean, kind of a twink. he hated it, wished he was more masculine, didn't look so much like a girl. no, it couldn't have been that; was he kind first? no, he remembered being silent when she first walked in. what was it about him to her? matter of fact, he started to think, what was it about her? he'd about finished 3 or 4 cigarettes thinking about her, how did she do that? with a few lines and a good hand? there had to be more.
what he did know, is that he loved it. he craved her badly, and he didn't even try to stop it from happening. he had never been submissive before, this was new territory for jamie.
she interrupted his thoughts, his phone bzzt-ing. she sent him a voice note back, the first time he'll hear her speak since she asked if he was ready.
"may-uh. most people call me my-uh though. i just have it kept as may because of that."
her voice was much stronger here, it was like she had been truly busy whispering the whole first night. her voice was smooth like no cracks, like she never smoked in her life (she hated smoking, she preferred lines and drinks) and deep like she had trained it to be deeper. he replayed it a few times, holding the phone speaker up to his ear and closing his eyes, mouthing 'may' with her. he left her on opened as he drove home, phone, cigarettes, and lighter in the passenger seat.
chap 3 ????
may found him again in the same trap house, a coincidence- and she came right up to him and hugged him. he hugged her back, rocking her a few times and ending the hug just to keep his arm around her shoulders. she hung off him while he talked to friends, and after they filtered off she tugged on his hoodie sleeve to bring his face down to hers. she kissed him forcefully, and whispered into his mouth that she had a gram and a bottle. he smiled against her cheek as she pulled him upstairs, to the same room- empty this time. they sat together, with him against the headboard and her leaning against his chest with the mirror in her lap, as she began to cut their lines. she handed him the bottle and touched her long nail to about half the bottle and he nodded, understanding they were meant to share half-half. he gently rapped 3 fingers on her shoulder and showed her his thumb and index finger curled as if he was holding a shot glass, and kinda wiggled his hand. she smiled, and looked back down at the mirror as if to dare him to chug it. he did, and took about a quarter of the bottle before putting it down, like it was water. they both appreciated the fact they didnt really need to speak, their time together was about the present and the future, not anything about their pasts. not any drama, not any anger. together, they were in bliss, and they didn't wanna ruin it. she put the mirror down and moved away from him and gestured he moved forward, and she took his spot behind him and smashed her face into his hair, wrapping her arms around his chest and shoulders as he picked up the mirror for his designated lines. she drank about ⅔ of what was left while he did about 8-10 short thin lines, both of them commenting in their heads about how slowly the other drank/took lines. but they were good still, because if they switched out then they were slow together. he came back up from the mirror, trying to breathe correctly and reaching for the water bottle he always had with him with water and black cherry water flavoring to help the aggressive ass drip. she pulled his head all the way back, nose to the ceiling as he fixed the drip because she noticed powder falling out. she handed him the bottle and he switched bottles, and he finished off his half. he cut a long fat line and took half of it, and held up the mirror to her for her half. after she took it she threw her head back, hitting the headboard hard. she burst ot laughing as she felt with her hand for a bump, and he smiled big,, first time hearing her laugh. it sounded so real, not like she tried to fake it or mask, that was just her honest to god laugh. he loved it. he turned around in her lap, straddled her thighs and pulled her body into his, tightly holding onto her as she happy sighed deeply into his chest.
cHp 4444 WOOOO
they woke up in each others arms there, relatively at the same time. Jamie woke up first though, and found her face right next to his with her arms all over his waist, and he smiled and blew air on her nose. she crinkled her face and woke up, giggling softly at him as she kissed his face all over. he gently pushed her further from him and rapped 3 fingers on her upper stomach, looking at her hopefully. she knew he meant was she hungry, so she smiled and rolled over to stretch, moving out over the whole bed and getting up. she walked downstairs to shower, leaving him there. he closed his eyes and moved to lay on his stomach where she was laying. he snapped his head up with an idea, and rushed downstairs to the shower.
he checked the one closer and heard her nails against the shower curtain. he opened the door, making sure the door made sound as he said "just me, love." in a whispery tone. she jokingly whipped the shower curtain over so just her head popped out, and she made a funny face as she nodded her head up, inviting him in. he gave her a small smile as he quickly stripped and moved in to the shower with her. he shuddered at iíce cold water hitting his back and she whispered to him "colder water is better for your hair." he tilted his head as if he had learned something new and he slowly moved his head back, getting adjusted to the cold. suddenly he felt her body, cold, up against his, and he hugged her back, forehead on hers. she let her head fall down and started kissing on his collarbone, soft pecks that he could barely feel until he looked down at her pretty lips working their magic. she moved up and over, following the bone and leaving small hickies on his neck. he groaned softly when she out of nowhere full on bit his shoulder, leaving prominent marks. she looked up at him in surprise, not expecting him to have liked that so much. she pulled his neck down and bit his jaw next to his chin, and he all but bucked his hips into her for more. she smiled against his chest as she ran her hands all over his body, admiring him, his happy trail, his slightly defined chest n abs (its not like he worked out, he was just skinny- he did run around alot though) and thought the filthiest of thoughts about the two together. but she had noticed him getting eager, and wanted to see how long she could hold him off. she pulled his shoulders back so she was leaning against the back wall of the cramped shower, and he put his hands on the wall behind her. she gently ran her nails down his body again, making him shudder at the very slight touch. he was starting to get handsy, reaching for her chest and her jaw, kisses on her body everywhere he couldn't reach before. she giggled as he showered her with affection, wrapping her into him, holding her closely. they liked that the most, simply being tight in each others arms and bodies, as close as could be. he kissed her neck, chest, stomach, and she felt herself getting wetter and warmer and all of a sudden he was kneeling in front of her holding her thigh to the side, licking he inside of her thighs, trying to tease her but ultimately teasing himself. she shivered when he gripped her thigh, moving it out even more to get a better angle. she had completely lost all sense of herself and how she wanted to tease him. he was too talented, knowing exactly where to touch her to cloud her head. he was intentionally missing the clit now, waiting to see if she would beg him or direct him in any way. she bucked her hips into his mouth gently, moving them to the side, guiding him. he smiled, having gotten what he wanted; and then absolutely ruined her. couple fingers in her holes and him sucking and kissing on her clit and she was almost yelling, the most incoherent gibberish about him. her head was so hazy, she was very coked out and still kinda drunk and it felt like the universe was genuinely melting down with the shower, the cold cold water washing everything except his tongue inside her away. he felt her body tense up and started going much slower, withdrawing his fingers slowly and starting to just rub her clit with his hand for a moment instead. she cussed harshly at the loss and looked down at him, mouth sticky, hair fucked up and eyes glossy, watching her body contract with need and she cried out with frustration as he resumed what he was doing, only much faster and aggressive. she moaned loud, loud enough for it to go straight to jamie's cock as she gently ran her fingers through his hair, rotating her hips against his face trying to ride into her orgasm, and then with his free hand that had been gripping her thigh, he touched her chest and gently brushed against her nipple and her knees jolted as if she were to pass out from the unexpected pleasure. her knees started to buckle as she came and he held her up by the hips, letting her body weight into his hands while she bucked her hips up into his mouth and cussed at nothing in particular. she rode it out and wrapped her arms around his waist, pushing herself into his body. they stood like that, letting the water come in between them and run over their bodies as they just enjoyed existence with each other. after she came down from her high she was still pretty drunk, pretty horny, n she slowly started rocking him in the hug, intentionally brushing his cock against her thigh that was still a little sticky and not completely washed away. she felt it grow against her and felt his breath quicken against her forehead as she reached to jerk him off, and he whined a high pitched moan into her ear. she smiled as she expertly made him feel good, w just the one hand. he started to whine more and buck his hips up, fucking into her hand and she flattened her hand on the back of his cock and jerked him beween her flat hand and her abdomen, letting him rut onto her easier. he kept his head down, his wet hair bouncing every time he moved, moans escaping him.
she whispered into his ear softly, "you are so needy for me baby, what do you need? you can tell me, i'll make it happen."
he let out a more strangled desperate moan followed immediately by "mmouth i wanna feel your mouth mommy.." his voice trailed off as he tried to get enough friction from her stomach to feel the best. she was surprised and took a moment before kneeling to suck him off, absolutely not expecting to be called mommy today during sex. not that she would complain.
her hand jerked the base as she ran her tongue up and down his slit, and her other hand roamed everywhere she could reach from her position. she bobbed her head down his cock as he shivered again, starting to get genuinely cold from the water they never changed. it didn't take long for him to get violently close, fucking her throat like it was all he ever needed and he unblocked his jaw to let gibberish flow out, "can i cum in your mouth mommy please I'm close let me ffeel ggoo-" his ramblings were interrupted by white flashes as he came onto her tongue and chest, shuddering and holding the wall so as not to stagger and fall onto her. he cussed at himself as he held onto her to breathe, letting her arms wrap around him. they sat down together under the water and she reached behind him to make the water hotter and turn the shower head off to make the faucet run for a bath. he was still breathing heavy as she reached forward to kiss him gently. she moved him to lay between her legs, and she pulled her hand out of the shallow water to get the small bottle of lavender/vanilla shampoo she had brought here days ago for herself. she put a quarter sized dollop in her hand and made it foamy, dipped her hands quickly in water and put her hands in his hair, massaging his head. he made a low sound and leaned into her fully as she worked it in quietly, them just listening to his hair, their heartbeats, their breathing. she closed her eyes and leaned her head against the shower wall again, spent but happy. happy and content, she probably wouldn't even need lines after this like she assumed she would in her head. she eventually forgot what she was doing, and just ran her fingers through his hair repeatedly.
she started humming to him, a sound he didn't recognize the melody of. in his mind, he labeled it the happy hum.