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All was silent as Mike let Ben into his apartment, but the hot, humid air between them crackled with anticipation. Ben stepped through the doorway, unsure of what to expect from any of this – from accepting Mike's invitation to his place to what they might or might not do. He had a great deal of control over his life and took pride in that fact. He'd told himself for so long that work was more important than personal relationships that he found he'd actually begun to believe it. He hadn't been with anyone since the divorce, and that had somehow become six and a half years. Far longer than that since he'd been with another man. He swallowed nervously as his eyes took in the small apartment Mike called home. There was no point in thinking about the past. Ben wanted to stay in the moment.
He could hear Mike behind him, no doubt watching him, but neither man said anything as Ben moved toward the pair of overloaded bookcases behind the couch. He stroked his finger down the spine of a title he recognized, but before he could comment, Mike's hands were on his waist. Ben didn't entirely manage to suppress the pleasurable shudder that ran through his body at the feeling of Mike's solid body pressing up against him from behind. And then those full lips were mouthing along the sensitive skin of Ben's neck. It was that more than anything that had Ben bracing himself against the bookcase as he fought to keep a hold on his tenuous composure.
Ben supposed that, if pressed, he would have assumed Mike would be a bit rougher, his touch bruising rather than gentle. He didn't think he'd mind that either, but as it was, the nearly reverent way Mike was touching him was nothing short of incredible. His hold was firm, but the way he kissed Ben, had brushed his nose against Ben's when they'd parted for breath, was tender . Even now, when he was turning Ben around to face him, he did so without rushing, seemingly content to take his time.
Ben's fingers threaded into Mike's thick hair of their own accord as their lips met once again. The urgency they'd felt back at Ben's office hadn't entirely gone away – it was quite obvious how much they still wanted one another – but it had also given way to a softness that Ben hadn't had the foresight to anticipate. As Mike crowded him back against the shelves, Ben couldn't help but remember how it'd felt when Mike had pressed him up against the alley's brick wall and kissed him breathless, their bodies slotted together. It was hard to believe that'd only been three days prior, only a weekend between then and now. His protests of ethical dilemmas and impropriety had fallen on deaf ears and at the moment, he'd never been more grateful for Mike's stubborn streak.
Mike's expert hands slipped underneath Ben's suit jacket and pushed it off, letting it fall to the wooden floor and Ben couldn't quite bring himself to stop to pick it up and fold it either. He let his own hands lead, doing what felt right, and gave Mike much the same treatment, pausing only to undo the button at the front of his jacket before dragging it down off his broad shoulders. His heart was hammering away in his chest, and he was pleased to find it had more to do with excitement and anticipation rather than anxiety. The nerves were still there, but with each brush of Mike's lips on his, each touch of Mike's hands on his body, he found himself growing bolder.
"Bed's this way," Mike mumbled into the kiss, hooking his fingers around Ben's suspenders and guiding him toward a small nook in the far corner of the apartment.
He let himself be led, lips chasing after Mike's. His leg bumped against the mattress when they reached it, but instead of pulling Mike down onto it right away, his hands moved to loosen Mike's tie, eager to see more of him. Ben's opportunities to admire Mike's form had been exceedingly rare, and even when he'd been daring enough to spare a moment to simply look at the detective, he'd either had his suit jacket or brown leather coat on. This was something else entirely, seeing him with his hair disheveled, tie undone, and the top few buttons of his shirt open. Ben realized that if he thought he'd hungered for Mike before, he was nothing short of ravenous now.
His long fingers made quick work of Mike's dress shirt and soon it, along with his plain undershirt, was discarded. Suddenly faced with Mike's bare chest, Ben found his breath stolen away. He was perfection personified, an entirely mouthwatering balance of lean, firm muscle and pliant, welcoming softness. Ben longed to reach out and run his fingertips across the warm, flushed skin, but hesitated. He didn't think himself a self-conscious person; he was able to look at himself in a mirror and see a passably attractive man while knowing he couldn't hold a candle to what stood before him. It was that thought paired with the sudden remembrance that he hadn't been with another man since law school that had him screeching to a halt.
He knew Mike sensed his trepidation and as Ben began to speak, he carefully took Ben's hand in his. "I'm sorry," Ben sighed, dropping his gaze to the floor as he felt his cheeks color. "It's – it's been a while for me… since I was with…" He trailed off, cursing himself for his sudden lack of confidence.
"Hey." Mike's voice was soft, soothing as Ben had ever heard it. With his other hand, he lifted Ben's chin until their eyes were locked on each other's once again. "None of that matters to me. Just let me take care of you."
The words, spoken so earnestly that Ben couldn't for a second question their truth, had an immediate effect on him. He felt himself nod, heart pounding once more, and then Mike was maneuvering him backwards and down onto the bed. His back hit the mattress with a graceless oof and the next thing he saw was Mike's gorgeous, genuine smile. He couldn't help but to return it, chuckling at the unintentional noise. It served to ease the tension, some of the awkwardness that came with first encounters.
Mike's lips were once again on Ben's, full and soft and demanding – heavenly. He couldn't resist threading his fingers through the thick mess of hair at the nape of Mike's neck, eager to hold him there for as long as he was allowed. When Mike's lips left Ben's, he didn't stray far, instead pressing kisses along his jaw. Each meeting of Mike’s mouth with Ben’s skin sent a current of excitement and pleasure through his body. It had been so long since Ben had slept with another man, and while he hadn't forgotten the experience, he hadn't prepared for the sudden rush of validation and affirmation he was feeling. To touch and be touched, to feel and be felt… this was what it was like to connect with someone in the most intimate way possible and Ben was glad that it was Mike who was there with him, even if he didn't quite know how this was affecting him.
"Wanna see you." The words brushed across the skin of Ben's neck, just barely audible. Mike's hand ran up and down his side, bunching up his previously unwrinkled shirt. Just as he hadn't stopped to fold his jacket, he couldn't find it in himself to care about his shirt either, and if Mike wanted to see him, wanted him bare-chested as well, who was he to deny him? Moments later, Mike sat back enough to swiftly unbutton the offending garment just as Ben slipped his suspenders off his shoulders and, along with Ben’s undershirt, sent it flying back over his shoulder.
Ben chuckled softly, but the hand Mike dragged down the center of his body made his breath catch in his throat. Mike's hand didn't stop at his waist band and instead traveled lower to massage the outline of Ben's cock. He made a strangled noise in response and twitched hard in his pants. What would it feel like to have Mike touch him without the layers of clothing between them, to feel those large, capable hands grip the length of him, stroke him? If the way Mike's eyes darkened was any indication, he'd find out soon enough.
Ben reached out, his hand finding purchase on Mike's waist, and pulled Mike back down. Just as their lips met again, their now-naked chests touched and Ben couldn't hold back a low moan. They were both on fire, bodies burning for one another. And then Mike lowered his hips to Ben's, allowing him to feel the insistent press of his own hardened length. Ben's hips bucked up, unable to control the automatic response and desperate for more, and Mike gasped into his mouth. For several minutes, all they could do was rock together, their bodies chasing mutual pleasure.
Gradually, their breathing became panting and a thin layer of sweat covered them, helped along by the August heat. Ben grew bolder, the need to feel more of Mike becoming even stronger. Each time Mike's lips wandered from Ben's and instead kissed his cheeks, his throat, his shoulder, the sensations shot down Ben's body and settled in his groin where his desire for Mike was nearing an edge he didn't want to plummet over just yet.
Both for that reason and another much more selfish one, Ben couldn't help but pull Mike back up for another passionate kiss. The cycle would begin again each time Mike's lips strayed to explore some new area of Ben's body. He could only hold out so long, though. He'd spent too much time daydreaming and fantasizing about what Mike's kiss would taste like that it seemed a waste not to crush their lips together each time he had the chance. Ben didn't know how many times he'd threaded his fingers into Mike's hair to urge him back up, but eventually, the gorgeous sound of Mike giggling breathily reached Ben's ears.
"I'll come back," he said, brushing his nose against Ben's before nuzzling into him, "I promise."
Once again, Mike's kisses strayed, this time to lavish Ben's collar bone thoroughly. Before Ben could tug him back up to catch those full lips with his once again, Mike was already on his way back. A surge of affection spread through Ben; it wasn't surprising, he supposed, now that he thought about it, that Mike was so thorough as a lover. And had he not dreamed about this for so long, he might have been more willing to let Mike continue taking his time, but as it was, his desire for more than just kisses and grinding together was making itself known.
"Mike," he choked out, hips stuttering when teeth gently sank into the soft skin where his neck and shoulder met. He needed more, but the words to ask died on his tongue when Mike pulled back and those grey-green eyes met his own. His hair, now thoroughly mussed, was plastered to his forehead and his lips were swollen, beautifully kiss-bitten. He was gorgeous. Ben swallowed hard, that gaze pinning him down far more effectively than Mike’s hands ever could, and forced the words out.
“I need more,” he said breathlessly. “Please.”
All at once, Mike was nodding and then their lips crashed together once again. He dragged a hand down Ben’s side, perhaps as a warning of his plans, and then moved to unbutton and unzip his pants. He didn’t stop there, determined as he seemed to give Ben what he wanted, and unceremoniously pulled them down and off along with Ben’s underwear. His cock sprang free to lay against his belly, twitching feebly at the momentary stimulation.
Mike paused only for a moment, his eyes positively raking over Ben’s naked form, desire written plainly on his face. But then he was moving again, discarding his own bottoms in a pile at the foot of the bed. While Ben stared at him openly, his heartbeat pounding throughout his entire body, Mike reached into his bedside table and emerged with lubricant and a condom.
Ben felt another rush of arousal course through him at the mere sight, felt it color his chest and cheeks. He watched as Mike squeezed some of the gel into his hand, coating his fingers, and though he was unsure if he was going to survive the encounter, he already knew damn well that he was going to enjoy it. As Mike ducked his head to kiss across Ben’s chest, his hand gently pushing Ben’s thighs apart, Ben was hit with the realization that this wasn’t just a one-night stand. He would have been fine with it if it was – of all people to spend a single night with, he could have done far worse than the beautiful, capable Mike Logan – but the way Mike looked at him, the way he’d kissed him… There was something there.
For his part, Ben had been in various states of pining over Mike for the last year. What had started out as simply noticing and appreciating his good looks had evolved into genuine feelings, due in large part to long nights spent in his office at One Hogan Place preparing the brash, outspoken detective for trials in which he’d be one of the State’s witnesses. During those sessions, he’d gotten to know Mike better, and though at first they’d rarely strayed from the point of their meetings, more and more lately had it become common for them to lose themselves in conversation completely unrelated to their work.
He’d sensed from the beginning that while Mike’s temper wasn’t exactly for show, what fueled it was genuine, earnest compassion and he’d been proven right over and over again. While perhaps the two of them went about it in different ways, what drove them in their work was the desire to find justice for victims and their families, to take one more criminal off the streets in the hope they were saving someone else from becoming a victim, another statistic. Injustice angered them both, and Ben suspected they had similar reasons for going into their respective lines of work.
Once again, those impossible eyes were trained on him from where Mike was trailing kisses down toward his hips. And though he’d been expecting it, he still sucked in a sharp breath when one of Mike’s slick fingers pressed against him. He didn’t know how he’d ever be able to make eye contact with Mike at the office again, but that certainly wasn’t going to stop him now. He gave a nearly imperceptible nod and did his best to relax as Mike’s finger slipped inside him. Almost immediately, his heart rate stepped up, but where he’d been braced for pain, he felt only pleasure.
“That good?” Mike’s voice was hardly more than a whisper, his lips still ghosting over Ben’s skin as if trying to create a mental picture of it through touch alone.
Ben nodded almost immediately, catching his lower lip between his teeth for a moment when Mike’s wrist shifted. “It’s good,” he managed, wondering just how easy it was for Mike to tell how close to falling apart he was. They’d hardly done anything yet, but Ben was borderline euphoric, could feel his body getting closer to fully surrendering to the sensations Mike was eliciting in him. It had been easy to believe that he hadn't missed this all that much up until now, when Mike was stretching him open with tremendous care and kissing every inch of skin he could reach.
Soon, one finger became two, and though it was clear that Mike was just as eager for the main event as Ben was, he didn't rush. Ben was certainly grateful for it, even as he grew increasingly desperate. He hadn't felt an ounce of pain or discomfort, just sparks of intense pleasure each time Mike's fingers stroked inside him just right. As a third digit joined in Mike's expert ministrations, Ben arched up, body rolling sinuously. Holding back any noises seemed a pointless task, and moans and whimpers began to fall from his mouth without the smallest bit of self-consciousness.
"Thought about this for so long," Mike suddenly murmured, his pupils dilated as he met Ben's eyes. "Seeing you like this, hearing you."
Ben swallowed hard, both Mike's words and his voice affecting him greatly.
"Couldn't take it anymore," he continued. "On Friday. I had to know what you tasted like, how it felt to have your body pressed up against mine."
A particularly delicious turn of his wrist.
"It was even better than I'd hoped, y'know. Smiled like a damn fool all the way home. Kept replaying it over and over, got all worked up."
A trail of kisses down the center of his belly.
"Didn't really have a choice, had to take care of myself. Definitely wasn't the first time I've come thinking about you."
Was it him making those noises?
"You're so goddamn gorgeous, Ben. Those eyes… Christ, the first time you looked at me, I shoulda known we'd end up here. D'you have any idea what you do to me?"
"Michael," Ben finally gasped, his head thrown back against a pillow, "please – ah – need you. Now."
He managed to look down his body just in time to see Mike's jaw go slack and his eyes cloud over with a craving so powerful he didn't know how they'd make it more than a minute or two. Carefully, Mike withdrew his fingers and moved up the bed to lay beside Ben.
"I got you," he whispered as he guided Ben to lay on his side facing away from him. Then came the telltale sound of the condom wrapper along with the cap on the bottle of lubricant. Ben's chest was heaving as he anticipated Mike's next moves, figuring it was for the best that he wasn't able to see Mike slick himself up. He wanted this to last at least long enough to feel Mike slide into him and he had a funny feeling that watching Mike touch himself would end things prematurely.
"C'mere," came Mike's soft, deep voice once again as he slotted himself in behind Ben, his chest pressed up against Ben's back. "You ready?"
"Yes," Ben nearly whined.
Mike hitched Ben's leg up and then as slowly as he could manage pressed into him. Ben tensed only for a moment before his entire body relaxed, allowing him to revel in the feeling of Mike's cock filling him, stretching him. His breath came in great, shaking heaves, and from the sound of it, Mike was affected similarly. He went slowly, seemingly doing his best to keep Ben from experiencing anything but bliss. As if his body wasn’t already working in overdrive just to keep from shouting, Mike’s arms wrapped around him and held him tight, held him close. A shudder ran through Ben’s body and his own hand flew up to grip Mike’s forearm, clinging to him.
After what could have been a minute or hours – Ben didn’t know or care – Mike’s hips began to move. He drew back, face pressed just below Ben’s ear and panting harshly, before slowly driving back in. The movement, simple as it was, lit a fire in Ben that hadn’t burned in years. As Mike set a relaxed pace, Ben couldn’t hope to keep quiet, letting each noise, be it gasp, groan, or whimper, fall freely from his mouth. Mike answered with deep, breathy moans of his own and when Ben tossed his head back and craned his neck, Mike met his kiss without a moment’s hesitation.
Ben was beginning to have serious doubts about whether or not he’d be able to survive all the things Mike was doing to him, but he couldn’t bring himself to mind. Each stroke sent waves of pleasure through his entire body, and everywhere Mike touched him was set aflame with desire. If he’d known back in that alleyway that Mike’s kiss would have led to this he didn’t think he’d have spent the entire weekend overthinking.
“You’re beautiful,” Mike breathed, his hold on Ben tighter than ever. “You have no idea…”
“I – oh, Mike –” Ben’s words broke off and became a long moan and Mike took the opportunity to resume kissing up and down his neck and shoulder.
To be wrapped so securely in Mike's arms, to have his entire body pressed up against his back was not only intoxicating, it was a privilege. Ben could feel each breath Mike drew in, soaked in every sound he made, no matter how quiet. His voice was low, wrecked and seductive, and just as alluring as the rest of him. Ben wanted to tell him how incredible he felt, what Mike was doing to him, but each time he thought he'd found the words, Mike's cock was sliding back into him and all that came from his mouth were breathy moans.
Mike didn't seem to mind, and while he hadn't stopped talking, his thoughts were much less coherent than before. Gasps of praise and admiration were whispered against the skin of Ben's neck and soothed afterward by full lips. Ben was barely aware of his answering moans and stilted words meant to make sure Mike knew he felt the same.
"Yes," Ben panted, "so good, so good…"
He couldn't help but cling onto the arm Mike had wrapped around his chest and each time he attempted to kiss Mike, his mouth fell open against his as he moaned. It seemed to spur Mike on and soon his hips were meeting Ben's ass at a much faster rate. And as extraordinary as it was, Ben wanted him deeper, harder.
"Michael, please," he whimpered, "I need –"
"What do you need? Tell me, anything, whatever you want, Ben, it's yours." Mike's voice was beautiful, wavering as he tried to keep his composure.
"More."
Mike's reaction was immediate. He carefully pulled out, drawing a weak moan from Ben as he did so. And then he was gently maneuvering the pale, lithe body in front of him so Ben lay on his stomach. He ran an appreciative hand down Ben's back before taking himself in hand and slowly, as if Ben were something precious, drove back into him.
Ben gripped the sheets and moaned, unabashed, as the new position allowed him to feel Mike deeper inside him. After a few rhythmic thrusts to allow Ben to adjust, Mike gave into his request for more. He draped himself over Ben's back, careful to support his weight on his forearms, and snapped his hips forward. The effect was immediate as Ben nearly sobbed with pleasure, the sensation two-fold. His own cock was trapped between the bed and his stomach, twitching and leaking at the long-needed friction, and Mike was reaching places inside him that had been long forgotten.
"Yes, yes, yes," Ben cried out as Mike set a much faster pace than before. He was grateful for the slow lead-up, but this… this had every inch of his body erupting with euphoria. Distantly, he could hear Mike's shattered voice encouraging him in between his own exclamations of pleasure.
"Takin' me so good, needed this, needed you – fuck – gonna make such a mess of you, gonna be so goddamn perfect –"
Ben arched back against Mike's every thrust, the sound of their bodies meeting echoing in the small flat. Ben had missed this so much more than he'd ever thought, but it wasn't just the sex, it was the connection. There was something there between him and Mike. He didn't quite know what it was just yet or what it had in store for them, but what he did know was that this wouldn't be just a one-night fling. And while he'd spent the last year trying to figure the detective out, that much he was certain about.
He supposed he shouldn't be surprised at Mike's stamina; it was easy to see how fit he was without a suit covering his body and Ben didn't doubt that he'd had plenty of opportunity to work on his staying power. He felt nothing but gratitude for that fact as whatever they'd done before had led them to each other. Mike's sexual prowess and confidence only made him more alluring.
Ben was used to putting everyone and everything else first. His own wants and desires took a backseat to whatever else was more pressing – and there was always something. After the divorce, it wasn't as though he'd sat down and made the conscious decision not to see anyone else. It was more that something else was always more important. Usually it was his children, Pamela and Peter, both of whom had his entire heart. They were everything to him and no matter how many times he'd wished his life had been different, he couldn't regret them. If it wasn't the kids, it was work. Throwing himself into his work was as familiar as breathing, even if it was occasionally to his own detriment. But he couldn't justify thinking about dating when there were more pressing matters.
Now it simply seemed like he'd been waiting for Mike to come into his life. Beautiful, gorgeous, stubborn, and brazen, Mike Logan had occupied his thoughts since their first meeting. Ben had nearly written him off as another cocky, lawyer-hating cop, and while those things were true, he'd since been lucky enough to see another side of him. He'd spent a fair amount of time in denial, trying to convince himself that he didn't have a crush on a colleague, but there had been so many sleepless nights where those green slate eyes were all he could see.
And now, here they were, doing what, looking back, seemed inevitable. They would have always ended up here, falling into bed together, chasing a mutual pleasure. Part of Ben wished they hadn't spent so long dancing around one another, barely daring to even give the insinuation that they might be interested in something more than just a working relationship. And yet, this moment was so flawless that he couldn't bring himself to regret a thing.
He let loose a broken moan and instantly knew he couldn't last much longer. The heat that had pooled deep within him was reaching a boiling point, the end growing closer with each delicious slide of Mike's cock inside him. He'd begun to tremble, his moans taking on a more desperate edge.
Mike seemed to recognize the signs, but instead of bringing them both to a shared release, he slipped out of Ben. He was ready for Ben's frustrated whine, and he was already there, urging Ben to turn over onto his back. Mike kissed him thoroughly, swallowing Ben's questioning sigh.
"Need to see you," he breathed as he gazed down at Ben, looking entirely too exquisite for as disheveled as he was. "That all right?"
Ben nodded, jaw going slack as he stared back up at Mike. It was clear that Mike had been just as close to the end himself, and while their desperation still hung in the air, the atmosphere shifted once again, giving way to something softer.
Without further thought, Ben wrapped himself around Mike and drew him in for another kiss just as Mike pressed into him once more. They moaned together and Mike found a rhythm that somehow straddled the line between bringing them to their release and taking into account the shift in mood.
"I'm close," Ben whimpered as Mike's arms wrapped around him, slipping between his sweat-soaked back and the sheets.
"Me too," Mike echoed. "Want you to come for me, sweetheart, wanna feel you."
Ben's mouth dropped open against Mike's as his entire body tensed with the build-up to an orgasm that he could only describe as earth-shattering. He came untouched, his cock growing impossibly hard before releasing in powerful spasms between their bodies. He could hardly hear himself crying out over the roar of his own heartbeat in his ears, and all he could do was cling to Mike as he rode out the waves of ecstasy.
"That's it, just like that," Mike choked out. A string of curses fell from his lips as Ben's body throbbed around him and after several more hard thrusts, he buried himself deep and came hard with his forehead pressed against Ben's and his hands stroking over Mike's broad back.
As the two of them came down from their respective highs, chests heaving and aftershocks running through their bodies, Ben wasn't particularly eager to let go of Mike. And for a minute or two, he didn't. He left one hand on his back, his fingertips ghosting over his heated flesh, while he drew his other hand through Mike's hair. Regretfully, Ben let him go when he pulled back, but he was pleased to find that his absence was only momentary. Once free of the condom, Mike climbed back into bed and pillowed his head on Ben's chest as though he'd done so a thousand times before. Ben resumed carding his fingers through Mike's thick hair and he noted with a soft smile that the detective almost seemed to purr.
Though Ben thought it both unnecessary and perhaps a bit embarrassing, he spoke the words that dominated his thoughts.
"Thank you."
Mike hummed softly and turned his head to press a kiss to Ben's chest, just over his heart.
Just as hindsight was 20/20, Ben couldn't know what the future would hold for the two of them. But for the first time, thoughts of the future didn't give him cause for worry. Instead, as he and Mike drifted off in the humid August heat, he was optimistic. Suddenly, the unknown didn't seem so bad.