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"Sam," called Josh, jogging out of his office and falling into step beside Sam as he made his way through the bullpen, "Sam, I've got it."
"Yeah, so do I, apparently," said Sam.
Josh blinked. "What?" he said.
"What?" said Sam. "Nothing. What do you have?"
"I figured out a way to get the Republicans to agree to the amendment. But what were you talking about?"
"Nothing," said Sam again. "That's great, have you told Leo?"
"I'm just on my way," said Josh. "Where are you going?"
"Uh," said Sam. He stopped walking, looking back over his shoulder at Toby's office. "Toby."
"Right," said Josh slowly.
"Donna!" shouted Josh, spinning on his heel in his office doorway.
"Yes, Josh?" she appeared around her divider.
"What's up with Sam?" said Josh, dropping into his chair.
Donna followed him into the room. "I'm your assistant, Josh," she said.
"I know that, Donna," he said. "So by definition your job is to assist me. I need you to find out what's up with Sam."
Donna sighed. "Josh, I'm the Senior Assistant to the Deputy White House Chief of Staff."
"I know that," he said. "That would be me."
"You want me to find out what's up with Sam," she said.
"Yeah," said Josh.
"Is it in any way relevant to the successful functioning of the White House and its staff? Or the country, for that matter?"
"It could be," said Josh cagily.
"Right," said Donna. "Okay. Finding out what's up with Sam. I appreciate the not at all vague or demeaning assignment."
"I appreciate the lack of sarcasm, Donna!" Josh shouted after her.
"Don't push it, Josh," she called back.
"He has a meeting with the President," said Donna.
"He's a senior aide, Donna, that's not actually unusual," said Josh.
"Josh, you do remember you hired me for a reason, right?"
"Uh, no, actually I remember you walked into our electoral offices and hired yourself," said Josh.
"Semantics," said Donna, waving a hand. "Anyway, I'm good at my job, so I think it wouldn't kill you to acknowledge that once in a while by avoiding the patronising tone."
"I don't have a tone," said Josh.
"You have a tone," said Donna, folding her arms.
Josh threw back his head. "Why does Sam have a meeting with the President, Donna?"
"I was talking to Margaret over lunch-- by the way, did you know that bottled water has gone up by almost a dollar, and-- "
"Donna-- "
"I'm just saying, isn't there something in the Bill of Human Rights that stops companies making a profit on water-- "
"The Bill of Human Rights?" said Josh incredulously, laughing.
"Yes, Josh, the Bill of Human Rights. It's-- "
"You do know there's a water cooler in the bullpen, right?"
"It's the principle, Josh."
"Right, you're all about the principle." Josh palmed a hand over his face.
"I am. And I would think, as a senior aide to the President, that's part of your job description."
"Speaking of job descriptions," said Josh.
Donna sighed. "Margaret said that Sam was talking to Leo and Leo talked to the President and now the President wants to talk to Sam."
"That's-- still nothing out of the ordinary, Donna."
"It was personal, Josh."
"How does Margaret know-- "
"She's an assistant, Josh, we know these things."
Josh raised an eyebrow.
"Also Sam said 'it's personal' and then shut the door so Margaret wouldn't overhear."
Josh rubbed at his chin. "And now the President wants to talk to Sam?"
"Yeah."
"About something personal?"
"He's a nice man, Josh. He cares about the personal wellbeing of his employees."
"I feel like that was a pointed remark," said Josh.
Donna shrugged airily and breezed out of the office.
"Sam," said Josh, jogging out of his office when he saw Sam walk past. He was maybe a little behind on his afternoon schedule because he'd had one eye on the door the whole time.
"Yeah," said Sam.
"I heard you have a meeting with the President."
"I have several meetings a day with the President. It's what I do."
"No, right, but I heard you had one this afternoon that we're not invited to."
"If I did have a secret meeting with the President, which I don't concede that I do, wouldn't it by definition be a secret?" said Sam.
"Come on, Sam, you know by now there's no such thing," said Josh.
"I feel like you're trying to insinuate you know something you shouldn't know," said Sam. "As a lawyer, I'd advise you to keep anything you know you shouldn't know to yourself."
"You're certainly talking like a lawyer," said Josh. "Sam." He stopped in the lull of the restricted area cut-off. "Is everything okay?"
"I'm fine," said Sam. He caught sight of Toby passing through the hall. "I have to go. Toby!"
"He's not fine," said Josh, watching Sam hurry along in Toby's wake. "Donna!"
"Do you think I should ask Leo?" said Josh.
"I think you should leave it alone."
"Donna," said Josh.
"I'm just saying. Obviously it's something Sam's not comfortable talking openly about. He's your friend. You should leave it alone."
"I'm going to ask Leo," said Josh.
"Of course you are," said Donna, shaking her head.
"Leo," said Josh, stepping into his office and closing the door behind him.
"Yeah," said Leo, not looking up from his desk.
"What's up with Sam?"
"What's up with Sam," said Leo, stretching to peer closely at the top of his document. "Sam is very enthusiastic, a little over-eager, a little idealistic, but very bright and a very good speechwriter, which is why myself and the President are in agreement on the issue of having him on staff." He looked up.
"Leo," said Josh.
"There's nothing wrong with Sam, Josh," said Leo, picking up his pen and looking down again.
"I'm not going to get anything out of you, am I?"
"No, you are not," said Leo distractedly.
"Right." Josh sighed, turning to the door. "I'll just be-- right."
He paused in the doorway.
"Just, Leo. He's okay, right?"
"He's fine, Josh," said Leo. "Go back to work. Margaret!"
"Yeah," said Josh.
"Charlie," said Josh. "Do you know anything about Sam's meeting with the President this afternoon?"
"I'm aware that Sam has a meeting with the President, but I don't know what it's about," said Charlie.
"Okay," said Josh. "Just out of curiosity, if you did-- "
"I wouldn't tell you," said Charlie, smiling.
"Good man," said Josh.
"Hey."
Josh looked up, blinking. Sam was leaning against the frame in his doorway. "Hey," he said.
"So I should tell you that I'm here under orders," said Sam, "And that if you don't like what I'm going to say, you should take it up with the President. He said you could."
Josh leaned back in his chair. "What happened?" he said bracingly.
"You got shot," said Sam.
Josh blinked. "I...know?" he said slowly.
Sam breathed deeply like he did before important meetings or briefing the President on particularly bad news. "You got shot," he said again, "And that was understandably a very traumatic and anxious time for all of us, myself notwithstanding, and-- "
"Have you prepped this speech?" said Josh suspiciously.
Sam sighed. "Josh, seriously, if you could clamp down on your inherent inability to let anyone speak uninterrupted for just two minutes, I'd really appreciate it."
Josh held up his hands. "Okay, okay. Go ahead."
"You got shot," Sam repeated, "And that was understandably a very traumatic and anxious time for all of us, myself notwithstanding, and-- "
"You totally prepped this," said Josh.
Sam folded his arms, lips pursed.
"Uh," said Josh. "Sorry."
"Josh," said Sam, uncrossing his arms and placing his hands on his hips instead, resettling his feet like he did when he was gearing up for a fight. Then he deflated a little. "Actually-- you know what, never mind. This is stupid. I'm just going to...go. And tell the President. That his idea is stupid."
"Sam, seriously," said Josh, pushing to his feet and moving around to stand in front of his desk. "What the hell is going on?"
"You know I'm not good at summarising things," said Sam.
"I know," said Josh. "That's why I'm so good at interrupting you. Sorry. I'll shut up, seriously."
"Don't sell yourself short, your skill at interrupting surpasses my encouraging long-windedness," said Sam. "Okay, so you got shot, traumatic for all of us, long story short I went to a therapist under heavy-handed suggestions from HR and it turns out I may have some unresolved issues regarding my feelings for you. Such as they are."
There was a silence. "That was a pretty decent summary," said Josh eventually.
"Thank you," said Sam.
"When you say feelings-- "
"I mean in the sense that I am apparently a fourteen year-old girl."
"Right," said Josh. "Okay, just-- just wanted to be sure."
"Yeah," said Sam. "Okay, so. I'm just going to go. And tell the President. That I-- yeah. Bye."
"Wait a minute," said Josh. Sam stopped. "Did the President make you come here and tell me?"
"Yeah," said Sam.
"I'm pretty sure that's not entirely legal," said Josh.
"I pointed that out to him," said Sam. "He threatened to deport me to Orkney."
"Yeah, once again I don't think-- "
"I know," said Sam. "He said Leo would help him find a way. I believed him."
Josh nodded, conceding. "Orkney?"
"Apparently there are some very interesting rocks," said Sam.
"Rocks," said Josh.
"Yeah," said Sam. He made to exit.
"Hang on," said Josh, half-starting forward.
Sam stopped, eyebrows raised.
"Just, if you wanted to give the President a more comprehensive report, you could hang around a bit." He shrugged, hands deep in his trouser pockets.
Sam frowned. "What-- "
"Shut the door, Sam," said Josh, stepping forward and, in a long-perfected manoeuvre, ignoring the panic prodding at the back of his mind.
"Okay," said Sam. He shut the door. Josh figured that was some kind of shocked autopilot kicking in.
Josh stepped closer. Sam backed into the closed door.
"Josh, I don't think this is-- "
Josh kissed him.
When he pulled back, Sam said, blinking, "You interrupted me."
"Yeah, I did," said Josh.
"...Okay," said Sam. "You should know I don't think that's an appropriate or acceptable method to employ when you don't agree with my opinion on the SPR."
"I'll keep that in mind," said Josh, grinning.
("Sam hasn't come out of Josh's office," said the President, hanging up the phone and smiling, satisfied.
"Mr. President," said Leo, "Are you having Donna report back to you?"
"And why shouldn't I, Leo?" said the President defensively. "I am the President of the United States. I think taking an active interest in the wellbeing of my staff is important."
"I think that title also implies a certain aptitude at and enjoyment in meddling, sir," said Leo.
"I can have you deported too, you know," said the President.
"Yes, sir," said Leo.
"And humouring me is a federal crime."
"I thought it was my job description," said Leo. "Aren't you concerned about the repercussions of this?"
"Of course I am, Leo," said the President. "But Josh and Sam are smart guys. The smartest. It's why I have them on my team. They'll be fine."
"I hope so," said Leo.)