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Natalie Scatorccio was having what feels like the second worst morning of her life.
She woke up late, couldn’t find her boots, her mom started screaming at her as soon as she opened her bedroom door to go do her bathroom routine that culminated with Vera slapping Nat across the face due to her “disrespect”. Jesus, she just wanted to get to school before her Spanish quiz in 2nd period. Oh, and now that she’s finally walking to school, it starts fucking raining right as the batteries in her Walkman die. Great. Just what she needed, a cold October downpour on the day she’s running late.
Sure, it’s no “my dad accidentally blew his brains out on the front lawn” kind of morning, but it still fucking sucks.
As she splashes through a puddle to turn onto St. Anne’s, she hears a car horn honking behind her, but she doesn’t think much of it until a Ford Festiva enters her field of vision, the tires kicking up standing water onto the curb.
Shauna Shipman.
The passenger door swings open and she hears Shauna yell “Nat! Get in!” from the driver’s seat. Nat has to think about it for a second, chewing on her bottom lip, her pride always coming first, until she hears a crack of thunder from the direction of the high school. Fuck pride, Nat thinks, and quickly climbs in.
“Thanks,” she mutters, pushing her soaked bangs away from her eyes before reaching to fasten her seatbelt.
Shauna nods before pulling back onto the road, Nat now barely able to hear the soft tones of Liz Phair coming through Shauna’s tape deck over the pounding of the rain on the windshield being swept away by Shauna’s squeaky wiper blades.
“Skipping school?” Shauna asks.
“Could ask you the same thing,” Nat retorts.
Shauna rolls her eyes a little, but grins before replying. “I had a doctor’s appointment. What’s your excuse?” It’s playful, and Nat relaxes, realizing she’s not actually getting the third degree from Shauna.
Nat’s always been a little fascinated at the glimpses of Shauna she gets when Jackie isn’t around. Shauna seems less guarded and a little more confident in these moments. She doesn’t seem so constrained, like she’s trying to be someone she’s not in order to make Jackie not look bad or something. It’s hard playing sidekick to the most popular girl at Wiskayok High, Nat thinks.
Maybe this is some of the Shauna that Jackie gets to see when it’s just them.
“Just… a bad morning,” is all Nat finally says, reaching up to rub at her burning cheek, the sting from her mother’s rings making itself known again. She can see Shauna watching her as she brings the car to a stop at a red light. Nat really doesn’t want to get into it or deal with Shauna’s giant and sad brown eyes looking at her all pitiful, so she jams her hand back into her lap and turns to watch the raindrops fall down the passenger window.
The car rumbles at the red light for what feels like ages, Shauna’s radio filling the silence.
“Let's actually skip today.”
Nat turns and practically gapes at Shauna. She watches as Shauna chews on the inside of her cheek, fingers drumming against the steering wheel, like she’s nervous of what Nat’s answer is going to be.
“Shauna Shipman wants to skip school? AP student, future valedictorian wants to skip and do… what, exactly?” Nat doesn’t mean for her sarcasm to come out so biting, but luckily, it doesn’t seem to phase Shauna.
“I don’t know, the movies, the mall, whatever. You’re having a bad day and school is not the solution to making it better.”
All Nat can do is stare at her as the light finally turns green and Shauna’s car is moving again. Shauna wants to skip school and go to the movies? Shauna Shipman is willing to skip school for her ?
“Won’t your… girlfriend be upset that you didn’t show or whatever? I can’t imagine she’s thrilled she had to find a different ride to school,” Nat almost regrets saying that after she sees Shauna flinch at the nickname she gives Jackie as she turns the wheel to take a right down Elm. Nat realizes Shauna is taking a longer, scenic route towards the school, presumably to give Nat a real chance to decide.
Luckily, Shauna ignores the girlfriend comment and continues. “I mean, if you really want to go to school, we can. I know you have a Spanish quiz today.”
Nat’s eyes grow wide after a moment. How the fuck does Shauna know about her Spanish quiz? She finished her foreign language requirements back in, like, sophomore year. Who is this Shauna that picked her up from the side of the road this morning?
“How do you- you know what?” Nat pauses and shakes her head softly before continuing. “Fuck it, lets do it.”
Everything in Nat’s brain and body is telling her this is a bad idea, to run, to go to school.
Instead, she watches Shauna do a little victory fist pump, earning a genuine chuckle out of Nat. She tries to ignore the heat in her stomach doing flips as Shauna keeps the car straight instead of turning left and continues toward their new destination.
What is going on?
“I don’t think the movie theater opens until like 11 or something, so maybe we can go see what’s playing and then grab a bite until it starts?” Shauna proposes, stealing a glance at Nat as she checks her side mirror.
Nat starts racking her brain to remember if her wallet is still in her backpack, and if so, how much money is in it. Fuck. Maybe she should have just gone to school. She just grits her teeth and responds with a curt nod.
They eventually pull up to the Wiskayok Cineplex that is conveniently attached to the Wiskayok Mall and Shauna grabs a spot near the front. By now, the rain has subsided into a calm drizzle, making it safe to leave the shelter of Shauna’s car and trek to the box office after Nat successfully finds her wallet.
She thinks about all the nights and summer days she’s spent loitering here with Kevyn, sneaking pulls of the flask and joints she kept hidden in her jacket pocket. They’d occasionally see a film when Eric was working and could sneak them in the side door, but otherwise most of their time was spent loitering and occasionally spoiling a movie for patrons walking inside.
(Nat’s a little excited at the prospect of being able to hang out here and think of a soft hand brushing against hers as they walk across the parking lot and the scent of floral shampoo mixing with the rain soaked pavement instead of Kevyn’s shit weed and gross dudes who catcall her as they leave the theater.
Again, what the fuck is happening? )
The box office isn’t open yet, but the times for the day are displayed on the analog board hanging on the wall behind the glass. Their eyes scan it for a moment before Shauna speaks up first.
“Any preferences?”
“Honestly, anything but Mortal Kombat . Kevyn has already made me see it twice and almost a third time on Saturday but I ditched him and watched To Wong Foo instead.”
Shauna chuckles, looking over at her. “Yeah, I saw it with Jackie and Jeff and it wasn’t really my thing. I did like To Wong Foo, though.”
She watches as Shauna turns back to the board for a moment before looking down at her watch and asking Nat “What about Showgirls? There’s a showing at 11:10.”
Nat has heard some interesting things about it from Eric and she thinks Gina Gershon is kind of a babe, remembering back to the episodes of Melrose Place she would watch with her mother. What’s a better way to spend a rainy Tuesday than with your soccer teammate watching an NC-17 movie at the mall?
“Sounds great, dude,” Nat tells her. And really, it does.
Shauna flashes a wide grin at her answer. “Well, we have about 40 minutes and the food court opened at 10, so Sbarro on me?”
Nat gawks at her in faux offense. “Are you disrespecting my ancestors, Shauna? My nonna would be spinning in her grave if she saw us eat that.”
Shauna’s face falls, eyes growing wide and Nat immediately starts laughing, unable to keep the charade going. She punches Shauna lightly on the shoulder before turning on her heel toward the mall entrance doors. “I’m just fucking with you, pizza sounds great,” she calls out over her shoulder.
Nat’s still laughing a few moments later when Shauna finally snaps out of it and starts following her.
The food court is pretty dead since it’s not even noon on a weekday, but Nat still grabs a table while Shauna goes to order the food. She’s not going to be picky when she’s not the one paying, so she tells Shauna she’s good with whatever and turns around to find a table before Shauna can try to argue. Except she’s pretty sure she sees Shauna just nod and turn towards the cashier to order.
She’s always kind of liked that about Shauna. She never pushes Nat, unlike the rest of their teammates. While Jackie or Tai would goad Nat until she either gave in or got so pissed off she’d walk away, Shauna wouldn’t. Sometimes she’d even tell them to knock it off. Not that she needed Shauna to defend her or anything, but they sure as shit wouldn’t listen to Nat, so whatever worked.
Despite knowing each other since elementary school, Nat has never really gotten to know Shauna in an actual friend type of way. They were always just slightly out of each other’s orbits until high school soccer thrust them together, and even then, she doesn’t know that much about Shauna. But, Nat spends a lot of time observing and trying to stay out of it. She hangs in the corner, watching her teammates and peers interact, trying to figure them out without actually having to talk to them.
She can see that Shauna is smart, calculated, funny, but way too under Jackie’s thumb. Nat knows there’s so much more to Shauna than she lets on, but her loyalty to Jackie prevents it from coming out most of the time.
Nat watches Shauna talk to the cashier from the table she chose for them.
How the fuck did she end up at the mall with Shauna Shipman on a Tuesday morning? This was certainly not the way she expected it to go when she stepped out of her bedroom this morning. It was supposed to be another shitty New Jersey day, failing a Spanish quiz while rubbing the sting out of her face, and then maybe smoking a joint and drinking a 40 oz. with Kevyn after school before trudging home, hoping her mom is passed out or gone by the time she gets there.
Instead, Shauna’s walking toward her with a tray full of pizza and two cups of soda before they go see a movie together. The butterflies currently churning in her stomach have also been a nice distraction from her cheek.
Shauna slides the tray onto the slightly sticky table before taking the seat across from Nat. Between them are four slices - two pepperoni, one olive, one pineapple and ham - and two Cokes in sweaty green and red paper cups.
Nat quirks an eyebrow up. “I really hope that abomination is yours,” she says pointing to the pineapple and ham.
Shauna smiles and rolls her eyes before picking it up to take a bite. “You gave me shit about this last time we had pizza with the team, Nat. You should really get new material. Plus, I got you a slice covered in those disgusting things, so I think we’re at a truce,” Shauna gestures toward the slice littered with olives.
Nat watches her take a bite before picking up her own slice. “That’s fair,” Nat concedes and takes a bite of her slice. She tries not to think too hard that Shauna remembered her favorite pizza topping.
They eat in silence for a bit, their chewing broken up by the top 40 hits playing over the mall’s sound system and the sound of a floor waxer being used on the other side of the food court. Nat cracks first.
“So, what are you hiding from today, Shipman?”
Shauna looks at her for a moment before swallowing the bite in her mouth.
“I can’t just want to hang out?”
Nat counters with a shrug (and warm, reddening cheeks) and takes another bite. “You can , but… fuck, I don’t know, we barely hang out during school, let alone outside of school,” she says around a mouthful of pizza.
Shauna returns the shrug and reaches for her Coke. “Just didn’t feel like going and it seemed like you didn’t want to either.”
“Yeah, but I never want to go to school.” Shauna chuckles at that and the heat in Nat’s cheeks is flooding to her ears. What is going on?
They move on to other topics, mostly about how the varsity soccer squad is shaping up, even though the more serious practices don’t start for another few months.
“Jackie thinks we can make it to Nationals,” Shauna tells her, Nat noticing the hesitation in her voice.
“Do you think we can?” Nat questions.
Shauna doesn’t respond at first, instead chewing on the straw in her mouth before taking a small sip.
Nat speaks up before she can answer. “Yeah, me neither,” she says as Shauna starts picking at the pepperoni on her other slice. “But I think it’s good that Jackie has that attitude?” She’s trying to be positive, she really is. That’s what a good teammate does, especially to the teammate that happens to be the best friend of the team captain.
Luckily, Shauna doesn’t push it and just nods before peeling up a pepperoni and tossing it into her mouth.
They finish eating the rest of their food and Shauna checks her watch as Nat tosses their garbage back onto the tray. “It’s almost 11, we should probably start walking back to the theater,” she tells Nat as she stands up.
Nat just gives a curt nod and grabs the tray before Shauna can take it to the trash cans surrounding the perimeter of the food court.
“Thanks, uh, for lunch,” Nat smiles over at Shauna as she dumps the garbage into a can and places the tray in the designated area on top of it.
Shauna grins back and knocks into Nat’s shoulder softly. “The least I could do for forcing you to miss school.” Nat feels her own smile grow wider as she shoves her hands into the pockets of her leather jacket.
Nat pays for the tickets, practically pushing Shauna out of the way before she can grab her own wallet.
“You got lunch, dude, I got these,” and Shauna gestures toward the opening of the ticket window where an older lady sits.
Shauna does insist on paying for popcorn and a drink (“I can’t see a movie without popcorn, so we can like, share, or whatever. If you want.”), so Nat helps her slather it in butter before grabbing a handful of napkins and following Shauna into theater 3 as the previews are starting. It’s just them and an older couple sitting near the front, so Shauna climbs the stairs of the theater toward the top row. She settles into the very back row, right in the middle, plopping into a seat and throwing the armrest down between her and Nat’s seat to put the drink into.
Nat peels her jacket off and throws it into the empty chair beside her before settling next to Shauna. She offers Nat some of the popcorn she’s already shoveling into her mouth while they sit through previews for the new Ace Ventura and James Bond films. Nat kind of hated the first Ace Ventura film, but Shauna’s laughing at something in the trailer so now she’s thinking about seeing it with Shauna. Maybe she’d like it more.
Luckily for Nat, the movie is starting before she can think too hard about it.
Showgirls is… not great, but in a ‘so bad, it’s tolerable’ type of way. It’s more violent than either of them expected, based on Shauna’s reaction (she’s definitely not stealing glances at the girl when she can or anything), but Nat keeps herself distracted by thinking about the way her hand keeps brushing against Shauna’s as she reaches for more popcorn.
The first time it happens, they’re both quick to pull away, Shauna shrugging at Nat’s whispered “sorry”. The second time it happens, Nat swears she feels Shauna’s pinky deliberately brush against the side of her hand as she pulls away. The third time it happens, it’s while they’re both reaching for the shared soda instead. Shauna pulls back, allowing Nat to take a drink first before she passes it to her, the pads of Shauna’s fingers burning the tops of Nat’s as she hands it off.
As they’re watching a scene involving ice cubes and Nomi’s nipples, Nat’s mind wanders a bit. She’s not sure what to do with these feelings she seems to be having about Shauna Shipman . Straight A student, star midfielder, future Ivy Leaguer if she wasn’t so far up Jackie’s ass, Shauna Shipman. Who she knows for a fact would never be into Natalie like that .
But then she feels fingers brushing against her hand that’s resting on their shared armrest but before she can pull away, Shauna’s hooking her ring and pinky fingers through Nat’s, keeping her there. Nat considers pulling away and Shauna’s grip isn’t tight enough to stop her, but she doesn’t. Instead she faces the screen, grinning, and tightens her hold on Shauna’s fingers.
A pretty girl wants to hold her hand while they watch a movie, who is she to say no?
A few minutes pass before Nat decides to get really brave and slots the rest of her fingers through Shauna’s, making it so that they’re fully holding hands. Shauna’s thumb rubs small circles on hers causing Nat to bite back a grin and relax a little further into her seat.
At this point, she’s fully convinced she’s dreaming. There is no way she is actually presently holding hands with Shauna in the movie theater on a Tuesday afternoon. Sure, she has always found Shauna attractive , but a crush on her has never crossed her mind. Her crushes are typically reserved for guys like Bobby Farleigh or girls like Lottie Matthews. Crushes that she’d never fucking admit to despite swapping spit and other bodily fluids. Natalie Scatorccio doesn't have a crush on anyone, as far as other people know. It’d ruin her street cred or whatever.
But the way Shauna’s hand flexes slightly in hers and the way she leans a little closer to Nat in her seat, causing that same floral shampoo scent she smelled earlier in the parking lot to combine with the popcorn fumes that are permanently seeped into the cineplex’s walls.
Honestly, Natalie has no fucking clue what’s happening in this movie anymore and she’s not sure she cares.
She’s in her own world until Shauna shifts and clears her throat, throwing Nat’s attention back to what’s happening on the screen. She watches as Nomi and Cristal share a kiss. Oh .
Nat thinks about actually pulling her hand out of Shauna’s because this is almost too much, but Shauna’s fingers just tighten around hers. Well if Shauna’s okay with it, then I can be okay with it.
The movie finally ends and Shauna shakes her hand out of Nat’s as the lights come back on. They gather their belongings and trash before heading back down the stairs and back into the lobby. Nat tosses the empty popcorn bucket and soda cup into the trash before clearing her throat and turning to Shauna.
“That was, uh, a very interesting movie.”
“It kinda sucked,” Shauna admits and all Nat can do is laugh. Yeah, it kind of did.
“I don’t know, when she beat the shit out of that musician dude, that was nice,” Nat admits.
Shauna laughs as she turns to face Nat, mashing the door exit bar with her back and holding it open for Nat. She mutters a thank you before Shauna continues as they walk to her car. “That’s true, I’m always down for seeing a man get beat up, especially by a woman.”
Nat snorts, but doesn’t respond. As they approach Shauna’s car, Nat notices that she’s not directly heading to the driver’s side door and instead is fiddling with her keyring and hovering near Nat.
Nat’s mind immediately goes into doomsday, damage control mode.
“I-”
“Look-”
They both speak at the same time, but Nat waves Shauna on, signaling for her to go first.
Shauna steals herself before taking a breath. “That was… really nice, Nat. Like, I had a good time. Or whatever.”
Nat can’t help but notice how adorable Shauna is when she’s nervous. Her pupils get wide, her full lips stay a little parted, and she gets this stupid, scared baby cow look on her face and all Nat’s brain can think about is how much she wants to kiss that stupid look off of her.
Instead, she ducks her head and kicks her boot against the pavement, biting back a grin.
“Yeah, me too, Ship.”
Shauna looks relieved and Nat chooses not to say anything about the hand holding. If Shauna doesn’t want to bring it up, Natalie sure as hell won’t. She watches as Shauna walks to the driver’s side door and opens it, but before she climbs in, she looks at Nat over the roof.
“Do you… wanna go somewhere and hang out? At least until school is over?”
Nat sure as fuck doesn’t want to go home and it’s barely 1:30, so Kevyn and Eric are still in school.
“Sure,” she smiles over at Shauna and follows her lead to climb into the car.
They end up at Shauna’s house, surprisingly. It started raining again after they left the mall, so anywhere outdoors was suddenly out of the question. Her mom is working an extra shift or something, so it’s empty and quiet.
After leaving their shoes by the door, Shauna leads her up her room, Nat taking in the Kurt Cobain and Dazed and Confused posters hanging above her bed. As she moves further into her room, she scans the mirrored vanity lined with photos of mostly Shauna and Jackie through the years, but she does find one photo of the Yellowjackets, stuck to the bottom left of the mirror, partially obscured by a can of hairspray.
If Nat remembers correctly, that night was after they won Sectionals back in her sophomore year. Jackie insisted on - no, demanded - a team dinner in the locker room after the game and before Nat could say no, she was being dragged by the hand to one of the senior girls' cars by Lottie. At the restaurant, as everyone stuffed their faces, Jackie went around with a disposable camera, the periodic flashes blinding Nat. She’s happy to know that one where she looks fairly decent and doesn’t have a mouthful of pepperoni has made it to Shauna’s vanity.
Shauna clears her throat behind her and Nat turns around to see her standing in front of her bed pulling at the hem of her flannel. “Sorry it’s…,” Shauna starts, but Nat cuts her off before she can finish.
“Cool room,” she says, shrugging off her jacket and laying it on the little bench in front of the vanity. She notices the rack of CDs behind Shauna and nudges past her for a closer look.
“Oh, uh, you can put something on if you want,” Shauna tells her as she takes a seat on her bed, scooting back until she’s against a wall next to her window.
Nat scans the selection. She figured Shauna’s taste in music couldn’t be worse than Jackie’s and she’s gladly proven right - Alanis, Garbage, Built to Spill jump out at Nat as she runs her finger down the spines. She’ll even give her a pass for the few Fleetwood Mac albums she sees.
She gets to the bottom of the first stack and sees it - a copy of Doolittle by the Pixies. Nat tugs it out from the CDs stacked on top of it before opening it to check if the disc is actually in there.
“Didn’t peg you for a Pixies girl,” she says, shooting Shauna a teasing look.
Shauna brushes a strand of hair back behind her ear. “I, uh, I’m not? I saw it at Sam Goody and recognized them from one of your shirts and thought I’d check it out.”
Nat gawks at her for a moment. Shauna bought a Pixies album because of her ? Maybe Nat has underestimated Shauna this entire time; maybe she isn’t as far up Jackie’s ass as she thought.
“Didn’t like it?”
“It was fine, I guess? I liked the monkey song.”
Nat full on snorts before mashing the open tray button on Shauna’s stereo and places the disc in after taking out a copy of Liz Phair’s Exile in Guyville . She looks around for the proper case for it, but comes up empty after a cursory glance, so she just puts it into the Doolittle case. Honestly, she hates when people put CDs into the wrong case, but she’s not going to go all weirdo music snob on Shauna right now.
As “Debaser” fills Shauna’s room, Nat stands awkwardly for a second, unsure where to sit. The bed feels too… personal and the vanity bench feels too far, so she settles for the floor, earning a laugh from Shauna as she sits, pulling her knees to her chest slightly.
“Too cool to sit on the bed, Scatorccio?”
Nat can’t help but think it feels a little like a challenge on top of teasing. She turns to look at Shauna, eyebrows raised but smiling.
“Fuck off, Shauna. Plus, maybe I feel uncool, this being your room and all.”
Shauna laughs and rolls her eyes. “Whatever, Nat,” she fires back as she reaches for her backpack that was on the floor next to Nat.
She’s not sure what they’re supposed to do during this hangout session, but Nat’s not really complaining. She’s discovering that Shauna, sans Jackie, is nice to be around.
Nat suddenly remembers the extra joint she stuffed into her jacket pocket last night as Kevyn dropped her off. Thinking it might come in handy to help her sleep, she actually ended up passing out before she could smoke it. Seems like it might be useful now.
She sits up onto her knees and crawls on her knees toward her jacket, pulling it off the bench and starting to rummage through the pockets. Nat checks the two outside ones with no luck until she finally hits the jackpot in the first inner pocket she checks.
Nat turns to find Shauna looking at her, a little perplexed, until Nat holds up her loot, causing Shauna’s confusion to melt into a soft smile.
“Your mom won’t care?” she asks, making her way back to the side of the bed. Shauna just shakes her head as she turns to slide her window up, the rainy breeze blowing the curtains all over. She manages to secure them out of the way as Nat climbs onto the bed next to her.
After getting settled, Nat brings the joint to her lips before pausing and offering it to Shauna. “Do you want to start it?”
Shauna immediately shakes her head. “It always burns unevenly when I do it.”
“That just means you’re smoking shitty joints.”
“They’re usually Van’s.”
“I rest my case, that student has not yet surpassed the master,” Nat says, pointing to herself and sticking the joint back between her lips. The smile Shauna flashes Nat makes the tip of her ears burn as she sparks her lighter and brings it to the tip, catching the paper on fire.
It only takes a few puffs until it has a nice burn going, so she passes it to Shauna, who has moved to sit cross-legged, facing her. Nat watches as she holds it between her thumb and pointer finger, bringing it to her lips, closing her eyes, and inhaling. Nat’s smoked with Shauna a few times, but never really paid attention to her like she is right now. If she wasn’t sure if what she was feeling about Shauna could be classified as a crush, it definitely can now.
Her chest seizes a bit at the realization and her brain already feels a little spacey despite only having a single hit.
Shauna passes it back to her and Nat probably not-so-subtly intentionally brushes her fingers against Shauna’s as she takes it.
They’re quiet for a while as they pass it back and forth. She steals glances at Shauna, watching her eyes get shinier as she takes more hits. She watches the way she licks her lips slightly before she smokes the dwindling joint. Nat’s also pretty sure she sees Shauna looking at her when she thinks Nat’s not looking.
Nat eventually composes herself enough to break the silence as Shauna takes a hit.
“What’s Jackie going to think of you spending the day with Natalie Scatorccio watching movies and smoking pot?”
Shauna coughs a bit as she exhales. “I’m my own person, you know. I don’t have to care what Jackie thinks.” It has a little bite to it and Nat knows she’s poked the Jackie sized bear inside of Shauna too much.
Good job, Scatorccio. You realize you like a girl and not even five minutes later, you’re pissing her off. Nat looks at the open window and wonders if she would survive jumping out of it right now.
“Yeah… you’re right. Sorry,” she says, instead, as Shauna passes it back.
Shauna shrugs before going back to picking at a loose thread on the bottom of her flannel. “Jackie doesn’t… know everything that goes on in my life.”
Nat’s not sure what to say to that, so she stubs the now-finished joint out on the brick outside of Shauna’s window. As she pulls the window back down to close it, she can feel Shauna’s gaze fixed on her.
Before she can settle back against the wall, Shauna grabs Nat’s wrist and tugs her closer until their lips meet.
It’s slow and tender, but a little desperate on Shauna’s part and all Nat can think about is how full and soft her lips are against her own slightly-chapped lips. Shauna’s right hand is still wrapped around Nat’s wrist, but then she’s bringing her left one up to cup Nat’s neck and all Nat can do is move closer to her, grabbing a fistful of Shauna’s flannel at her hip.
Their folded legs are knocking against each other as Nat deepens the kiss, slotting her tongue between Shauna’s lips, evoking a groan from deep within Shauna’s throat. That’s all it takes for Nat to move to sit up on her knees and push Shauna back gently until she’s lying down, never breaking their kiss. Shauna pulls Nat by her shirt until she’s hovering above her. She feels Shauna rake her fingers through her hair, fingers getting caught a little on the sporadic tangles from walking in the rain throughout the day.
The sting brings Nat back to her senses for a moment and she pulls away from Shauna, but doesn’t move to sit up.
“This ok?”
All Shauna does is nod and pulls Nat back down on top of her, licking into her mouth before they resume making out.
Nat’s entire body is buzzing , like she just touched that stupid electric fence trying to escape the cops at Danny Mears’s party out at his family’s farm. She’s never felt like this just kissing someone before.
Okay, so this is definitely not the way Natalie expected today to go, but she’s not complaining.
Shauna kisses her roughly, hungrily, and Nat can’t get enough. She can faintly taste the weed and popcorn Shauna ate earlier and it’s perfect . Nat won’t lie - she’s thought about kissing Shauna a few times - usually while drunk at a party or, once, in the locker room, after a particularly long dry spell when she’d had enough of the shitty boys that go to Wiskayok.
Nat just never thought kissing Shauna would be this nice . She also never thought it’d be Shauna the one initiating it, but she’s not going to think too hard about that.
She’s not sure exactly how much time passes, but Shauna’s stereo has looped back around to “Wave of Mutilation” by the time they finally pull apart again. They’re both panting, lips red and swollen, and Shauna’s arms are still looped around Nat’s neck, gently rubbing her thumb on the nape of Nat’s neck. She smiles softly up at Nat, causing her to blush and lose the progress she’d made on catching her breath.
They’re pulled out of their bliss by the loud shrill of Shauna’s phone ringing next to her bed.
“Do you need to get that?” Nat asks.
“No,” Shauna replies, voice cracking a little bit.
The ringing eventually stops and, a few seconds later, the answering machine takes its place, broadcasting Jackie’s voice through the quiet room.
“Shipmaaaan, pick up!”
Shauna groans in annoyance and throws the arm that was around Nat’s neck over her eyes. Nat takes the cue and pushes herself up and off of Shauna, moving back to where she was sitting on the bed while they smoked.
“You better answer, Shauna, or I’m coming over,” Jackie continues over the machine. At that, Shauna’s jumping up and grabbing the phone off the receiver, wiping her mouth before answering.
“Hey Jax,” Shauna greets her. Nat can’t hear Jackie’s side anymore, but she’s hopping off of the bed and adjusting her shirt and jeans, running a hand through her hair, before moving to grab her jacket.
“No, I just got soaked leaving the doctor’s office, so I ran home to change and just… didn’t feel good?” She glances at Nat who throws her a sarcastic thumbs up, causing her to grin. “Uh, yeah, I’m feeling better after going back to sleep for a bit. I was going to call you in a few, but you beat me to it.”
Nat’s putting her jacket on as Shauna tells Jackie she has to help her mom with something and she’ll call her back later.
“Very smooth, Shipman,” Nat says as soon as Shauna hangs up, watching as Shauna moves toward her before grabbing the sleeve of her jacket.
“You don’t have to go,” Shauna whispers and Nat wants to stay, she really does, but it’s not a good idea. Honestly, she needs some space to fucking process the day, and knowing Shauna, she does too, even if she won’t admit it.
Nat cups Shauna’s cheek and pulls her closer, placing a soft kiss on her lips. They linger for a few seconds until Nat breaks away.
“I do,” she says, running her thumb on Shauna’s cheekbone before stepping back.
Shauna curtly nods before gesturing to the staircase that leads downstairs. “Let me walk you out.”
Nat reaches for Shauna’s hand and tangles their fingers together as Shauna leads her downstairs. They reach the front door and Shauna pulls her in for another quick kiss before opening the door.
“I had a nice time today,” Nat tells her, slipping her boots back on and throwing her backpack over her shoulder. It’s honestly the best day she’s had in a long time. She’s not the best with words, but something tells her that Shauna knows that.
“Me too, Nat.”
Nat turns to head out. “See you at school tomorrow?”
Shauna nods, watching as Nat heads down the walkway and onto the Willows Court pavement.
She makes it to school early the next day, having practiced an excuse for why she had to miss her Spanish quiz, in hopes that Mrs. Alvarez will let her make it up. She’s digging her math book out of her locker when she hears Jackie Taylor’s voice grow closer, talking about some party planned for Friday. She looks up and, sure enough, Shauna is right beside her, eating a Pop Tart and half-listening to Jackie. Her eyes meet Nat’s, the annoyance in them quickly dissipating, turning brighter somehow as they hold eye contact. She can’t help but grin a little at that, which causes Shauna to smile, too.
The pair pass Nat without making contact, Jackie seemingly unphased by Nat’s presence.
Maybe Jackie doesn’t know everything that goes on in Shauna’s life.