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Mikey knew that there were moments in time when Takemitchy would know things. It usually wouldn't have been a surprise, considering how he was a time-leaper and constantly fought with fate.
But sometimes he knew so much - too much actually.
Because how in the world can he even read Manjirou like an open book? The Invincible Mikey, who always made sure to maintain an unreadable expression to contain his deepest emotions, could be easily read by Hanagaki Takemichi.
He always knew what to do for Mikey, even before he could ask for it. Hell, even if he wouldn't have said anything at all, Mitchy would always know what to do.
It confused him - but not too confused, because he was exactly like this to Takemitchy too. Reading Takemichi as if he was just some mere fairytale book written for children. One look at Takemichi and he'd always know what he needed.
But, in the end, he never really knew the reason.
He never pondered too much about it until the dusk of June 7th, 2005.
Mikey sighs heavily as the last body standing drops down to the ground, surrendering to him.
They had just fought a minor gang, like any other normal day. They are Toman, after all. Things like these happen so often that it was normal for them - especially since both he and Michi had to work 10 times harder to make sure everything went smoothly for Toman this time.
But ... something about today just didn't seem like his average day. Was it because after an exhausting afternoon, he oddly wanted to hog Takemitchy all to himself?
He didn't pay much attention to his surroundings as he rushed past everyone to pull Takemichi aside. His ears had only picked up that Ken-chin was announcing Toman's victory, bikes starting and scrambling off. Mikey grabs Takemitchy by the arm with no word and rushes him toward his Babu. Takemichi was taken back a bit but said nothing as he let himself get dragged by their captain.
Manjirou didn't .. exactly know what made today so odd. Was it because they had just fought with a gang? Was it the way the atmosphere felt strangely different?
Mikey felt it, and he was pretty sure Takemitchy did too.
Finally alone, - after a not-so-careful motor ride towards the beach - he finds a spot right at the edge of the sand that hasn't been touched by the ocean yet. He sits down and pats the small space right next to him, signaling Takemichi to sit there, wanting to talk to him. The taller blonde obliges, and he settles himself beside Mikey, letting the cold breeze sway his messy hair as he closes his eyes. Mikey turns his gaze toward him, and his face immediately turns into a deep frown.
The sight was unsettling - Takemichi looks pretty bruised up. His face has been covered with scratches and dirt, and puffed cheeks are now red from swelling. Even if he was getting stronger and is visibly improving with his attacks and his immunity was still sturdy as a rock, he nevertheless looked worse than ever.
Takemichi looks at Mikey, noticing how his leader was staring at him for way too long. He caught on to his thoughts pretty quickly and grins at him, " 'You're always getting yourself hurt.' was what you wanted to say, right?" Takemichi cheekily grins.
Mikey sighs at this. ".. How do you always know what I wanna say.." Mikey scoffs as he pinches Michi's nose.
"I'm just that good!" Michi proudly states as he laughs at how Mikey pouted.
Mikey rolls his eyes but giggles anyway, though he had to be serious about this - this is Mitchy we're talking about. "No but .. really, you're always looking like this no matter who we fight, " he says, emphasizing the last words.
"Aren't you used to it by now, Mikey-kun?"
Did Takemitchy seriously not get how dangerous he gets his body into? Sure, being reckless was completely normal when it came to Takemichi, but that was exactly his problem!
"Still! You should have-"
"Yeah yeah, I know, sat this one out, they weren't even an important gang, I should have called you, I know Mikey-kun."
Mikey just furrows his eyebrows and looks away, "Hmph."
Takemichi sighs at this, and tries to apologize, "I'm sorry," but it didn't work for the stubborn as-hell Mikey as he continued to pout, visibly upset at Michi.
Takemichi doesn't seem to give up though as he tries to avert the topic, "You know Mikey-kun, you don't look so alright yourself." Mikey turns his head back to face him as he raises an eyebrow at this, confused about what he was talking about.
Takemichi, again, as if Mikey was saying his thoughts out loud said, "Blood. Here let me help-"
Eh?
A warmth caresses his face, as it tries to wipe off the crimson that covered it. He can no longer feel himself breathing, he was caught off-guard by the sudden touch and has forgotten to inhale as Takemitchy did not let him do so.
Mikey felt like melting into it - he wanted to close his eyes and trap that warmth to hold him and only him.
But instead, he lets his lips escape out a sigh as he looks at Takemichi in the eyes and lips alternatively - wondering which of them looked prettier under the shade of the sunset.
Once he felt the hand leaving his cold skin, the only thing his mind was screaming was for him to bring it back. He wants to hold on to it as he mumbles, 'please, just a bit more,' but he keeps those thoughts well hidden in his heart - like he always has.
He slowly swallows as if he had just gulped a huge chunk of food and he turns his head around to face the ocean, too afraid to lock his sight with Takemichi's own ocean eyes - for he fears he might let regretful words escape his mouth.
When, he wonders, can he finally say them though?
He shakes his thoughts off as Mikey turns to examine the boy a little bit more. For some reason, he can't help but feel a little sense of deja vu. Mitchy's face getting beaten up wasn't .. rare, but something about the odd feeling he had a while ago and seeing Mitchy like this ... something felt so .. all too familiar.
It felt as if it was -
"Today." Mikey's eyes widened as he let out a small gasp, realization dawning on him.
"Huh?"
"It was today. Today is July 7, 2005, right? In the second timeline, several years ago, you and me - we met today. But because we've already met as kids in this timeline, you and your friends haven't gotten involved with Kiyomasa."
Takemichi's eyes slightly widened before relaxing. Silence fell upon the two, the wind being the only source of any sound.
"Oh," Takemichi replies as he brushes the sand they were both sitting on.
Manjirou can't believe it. How could have he almost forgotten? The very day when his fate changed, the very day when he met the person who did just that - was today.
They stayed like that, silent for a while. It wasn't very uncomfortable, soothing even, as it lets them reflect on many things. What they were doing that day after they met, what they wouldn't have been doing if they hadn't met, the words that were spoken, the exchanged curious looks, basically just everything that July 7th brought upon them. He doesn't even feel how his fingers started to fiddle with each other, and when he did, he just stared at the man beside him. Should he talk to him about it? Maybe it was better he shouldn't, worried he'll say stuff he would later on wish he hadn't.
But he decided to anyway.
So, like an idiot, he inhales a plenty amount of air, feeling like it wasn't enough and yet still going for it anyways, "You know.." Mikey starts.
Takemichi was looking at him with his big blue eyes, curious of what the smaller male would say. Takemichi immediately notices some sort of hesitancy though, so he holds his gaze unto him, a silent signal of 'Go on, I'm always listening'. Mikey understood this, and so he did.
"When I ... found out about the curse, I've .. always hated the idea of my 'destined' path. A path of carnage? A path so slim that there was no room for anyone else? No way." he continues. He can feel his hand slowly clutching on its own.
"But I had to do something. Pushing you all away was the best decision I could think of, the best decision in general. I chose to do it with zero hesitation."
"But then .." He pauses to look Takemichi straight in the eyes before surveying the dusk scenery right in front of them. ".. You came back - for me. Formed Toman again for me. And I know I've never said this before but... I'm glad you did."
".. And. I'm glad you managed to be there, to pull me out of it. I'm glad you are here, right beside me, right now ." His fingers seemed to have a mind on its own, as they started playing with the sand below them, too scared to just grip Michi's fingers to intertwine right then and there.
But, honestly, was it just him or did everything suddenly start feeling tense?
"You changed my life so much. I don't think you know that very well, and I don't think I've thanked you enough for it." He smiles slightly, still not looking at Takemichi, despite the expression being targeted at the taller male. He can feel Mitchy's gentle yet sharp eyes, still locked onto him.
"I'm glad that I came with Ken-chin to that underground fight. I'm glad we went to check it out and.." he pauses for a bit, before continuing. ".. And .. well ... you know .. I've always hated Kiyomasa. He was nothing but a fuck who hurt both you and Ken-chin. I almost lost you both to him." his voice suddenly sound taut.
"But.. well .. if it wasn't for Kiyomasa.." Manjirou can feel his ears turning slightly pink as he suddenly feels embarrassed to say the next unspoken words. "I'm... I'm glad that I.. you.." he pursed his lips, why of all times did he suddenly feel shy blabbering stuff now?
Before he crumbles right then and there, he senses Takemichi placing a hand on top of his, squeezing it tight, not scared of the possibility of accidentally time-leaping to the future. They tried before, and it didn't work, so hand-holding was never foreign to them. Still, whenever Takemichi would do this, he would feel a tickling sensation down his stomach, was it the ones they call butterflies? Mikey knew that this weird quiver was never because he was scared.
"I know, Mikey-kun. I know. I'm really… really glad I've met you too." Mikey, finally turning his gaze on Takemichi, gets greeted with that oh so fucking reassuring smile he's always shown him.
"I was nothing but a shit coward, someone who only knew to apologize. Someone who worked at a DVD store for a living - someone with a garbage dump as a place to call home." Mikey nodded. Although he already knew Michi's life before the time traveling, he would always be there to listen to whatever Takemichi would say.
"But then .. you came into my life like a sudden tide. Wherever you walked, you had this .. aura that can pull everyone with you that even stars and moons followed. I got pulled to this aura .. and I'm also glad I did," Takemichi continued as he felt Mikey's gaze on him.
"I've never been happier like how I was when I met you, I've never once regretted it. Even if you stabbed me .." he chuckles and Mikey looks at him with a slight frown, not really liking how that was suddenly brought up but didn't speak anything of it.
"I was alone.. so alone that it slowly drove me insane," he continued, "So alone that I didn't even care about dying in your arms that time." Mikey's eyes widened in a slight surprise but continued to listen. "Because in your arms, I never felt alone. I was never alone."
Stills. Mikey just .. stills. He hoped his rapidly beating heart could still too.
"When you pulled me and showed me this kind of family... I .. well ... I don't think you know much, you practically saved me. I don't think you know how much bringing me to Toman means to me. I don't think you know how much I became a better person after meeting you."
"I don't think you know how much meeting you mean to me."
Mikey could feel his breath hitching. Has Takemichi always been .. like this? Saying such straightforward words like they were nothing? Mikey feels like he wants to say something, but stops midway when he realizes Takemichi has more to say. Mikey hopes he could cover his ears because he might not control himself if he hears more.
"And.. you know.. have I ever told you .." Takemichi pauses to raise his hand to caress his cheek, lightly brushing Mikey's nose with his thumb. "..That your smile would be the only thing I thought of any time I was happy?"
Then something hits him. This electric feeling ran through his chest as if it was always meant to pass it. It wasn't the same electric feeling of the time-travel, it wasn't the same thump that he feels whenever he was about to go berserk - god he knew that feeling all too well to know.
No, seeing him like this, with his soft, genuine smile as a gentle blow of wind swats his black curls, eyes fluttering as the light from his eyes glows even more, it hits him with an electric feeling of desire. Of need, of want - want of Takemitchy.
This is gonna be cliché, he thinks. But fuck it, if he could have Takemitchy for himself for even a minute, even as a cliché scene from a high school movie, he'd take every role possible. And maybe it was just his vision blurring as he closes his eyes, ears ringing so that he can barely hear the waves anymore, but he could have sworn he felt Takemitchy lean in too, wanting a cliché scene with him. The kiss started slowly until both of them started feeling a little bit desperate. Mikey leans in a bit more, angling his head to try to take him in a little deeper.
If he hadn't given in so much, maybe he could have felt how the taller person equally desires him too. They haven't even realized that Mikey had somehow lost his own footing, bending way too much that half of his body was now on top of a laying Takemichi. They both let go, gasping for air. Takemichi's arms were wrapped around his neck and Mikey noticed how his own hands were on his waist.
Heavy panting filled the small space they've created for themselves and then the familiar feeling of realization, regret, and guilt hits.
He had just kissed Takemitchy.
He had just. - oh my god.
He had just kissed his best friend - a man who was destined to marry Hina, a woman, someone very different from Mikey.
This is wrong, he thinks. I shouldn't be doing this, the fate will drastically change.
But .. somehow it had felt so right - so right that it was starting to feel wrong. But .. It was good, too. Too good, god, what if we had just not stopped?
He shakes his thoughts off, he has to fix this. Takemitchy can't like him, and Mikey can't too. He sat up immediately, but to be honest he was hesitating. He felt movement from his side, he knew Takemichi sat up too. He wanted to turn to him, but he was afraid. He doesn't want to look at the man. The man he had just kissed, the man from whom he just robbed Hina. The man who was just his best friend - the man who should stay as his best friend, he was foolish to think they could - should be something more.
Takemichi was just looking at him with confused eyes, had he done something wrong? Why did he pull back?
"Mikey-kun?" Takemichi tries, attempting to reach his hand, but Mikey gently slaps it away.
"Don't." he sharply and immediately responds.
"Mikey," he repeats with the same, intense, sharp tone - but it was clear that he was hurt. Why was he acting like this?
Mikey was taken aback, but he had to say something. "This shouldn't happen. We shouldn't happen." He says, closing his eyes as he annoyingly rubs the small space in between his eyebrows.
"Why?"
This made him wonder. Of course, Mikey knew the reason why. He knew exactly why this was scary, but he just can't bring himself to say it. He needs other reasons.
"Because this is inappropriate. Frowned upon. Men liking men is still considered strange during this time." he says, after a few moments of thinking.
"Do you care what they'd think?" The answer was sharp, immediate, and confident. No, of course not, he thinks. He doesn't, hell if Takemichi were to be his he'd sing songs about it at midnight. When everyone was sound asleep. He'd put it on speakers too. But he wasn't his - shouldn't be.
"The other gangs would use you against me. What do you think would happen if they found out that the Invincible Mikey had a partner? They will use you as bait for sure."
"We can protect each other well."
That was .. true. But Mikey won't give up. He has to convince Takemichi that this was wrong.
"Then what about the others? Aren't you scared that if our friends ever found out, your relationships with them could change for the worse?" Mikey's tone started getting louder, he needs Takemichi (to realize). He'll have to apologize to them later, he knew that would never be the case. Despite being absolute brutes and violent in fights, they were all the sweetest and most genuine people he could have ever asked for.
"Then we'll keep it a secret. But honestly, do you seriously think we chose close-minded friends?" again, true.
Mikey just stares at him with a dead-panned expression. Maybe seeing how Mikey won't say anything more anymore, Takemichi scoffs, "Come on, Manjirou. I know the real reason why you're hesitating this - us. You don't have to-"
"God fucking damn it Takemichi! If you know then why won't you understand?!" He was starting to get annoying. Why won't he just get it? Did he seriously not know the risks, how drastic of a change this was to the future? The possible negative effects of it?
"You are risking your happy future with Hina. Takemitchy, you don't want this. You don't want me. You want Hina." He scolded, successfully hiding back tears as his own words cut himself.
"Who are you to say what I want and don't want?" Takemichi says, now raising his voice too.
"And who's to say you can either? People often can't differentiate what they desire. This is just new to you. You're just confused. You-"
"Shut. Up."
Mikey's mouth stilled. Was Takemichi .. angry? He looked like it. He hopes he wasn't. Upsetting him was the last thing he wanted. But .. for some reason, he was thankful Mitchy made him shut up, he can't stand the nonsense his mouth blabbered about.
But Takemichi's shoulders soften, along with his tone as he tries again. "Mikey.." Takemichi reaches Mikey by the shoulders.
"I've liked you for a long time. Liked you so much that I was starting to feel sure you felt the same. I know and you know that we both need us. I know and you know that you.. we want this. That you and I together is the perfect future."
Mitchy looks at him with those intense as fuck ocean-blue eyes, and god how he loves and hates them right now. He tries to look away. Please, he thinks. Don't look at me. I might actually believe you.
Don't look. Don't look. Don't -
"So please, Manjirou. Don't argue with me and tell me that I don't belong to you. It hurts me, you know?" He feels the grip on his shoulders slightly tightens.
"But... Hina.."
"Oh, haven't I told you? I rejected her confession. I've stopped loving her for a long time now, Manjirou. I thought you would have noticed." He joked, but the light seriousness never left his tone.
Wait, what? No, he couldn't have heard that right. He... rejected Hina?..
"But..-"
"You want me, right? You like me too, right?" At that, Mikey felt like giving up. There was nothing to reason with him anymore. He could lie right now and tell him how he wasn't correct - tell him that no, he does not want him that way.
"Just tell me, Manjirou. Tell me that you do not want me, and I won't press on this. I have to hear it from you."
But he chose not to. Why does he not want to? Instead, he raises his head, furrowing his eyebrows. He knew right there his eyes shined and his lips tightly pursed. An unspoken 'No, please, I do want you.' was apparent on his face. Takemichi's face relaxes, and a soft smile reappears on his bruised face. "Good, that was all I needed to know."
Mitchy cups his face again and pulls them both into a tight hug and for a moment they stay like that. In each other's arms, where they both want to be. Until movements start to happen - roaming hands slowly exploring the others' upper body, lips running up necks as they give tender kisses, intoxicated noses inhaling every scent of their partner.
The warmth of the sunset - which, gone unnoticed, has already vanished by now - was nothing compared to the warmth they felt at this very moment. Words never escaped, but did they really need to They haven't even felt themselves pull back to lay back down on the sand, gazing at how the sky was now pitch black, the only thing to stare at was the stars scattered all over it. Side by side like this, hands intertwining like it'd be their last, Mikey felt safe, wanted. He felt like he was home. But there was this doubt. This feeling of .. maybe it wasn't real.
He turns his head, looking at Takemichi who was now looking back too.
"Do .. Do you really like me..? Are you sure you're not.."
Mikey looks him straight in his eyes - his ocean blue eyes - trying to look for any sort of sign that this wasn't real. Worry was starting to cave his vision. Because maybe Takemichi just felt bad for him and was just trying to make him happy. Maybe he might have even turned cruel and would later shout in a mocking tone, "Just kidding!".
He knew Takemitchy wasn't like that, but .. still.
Just- to be sure..
"Don't lie to me. Please - I won't be able to handle it. You-"
He got caught off as the lips he tasted a few minutes ago were now on top of him to smash his and let him taste them again. There was nothing fervent about it and it didn't last very long, but it felt as if that was all he needed. Takemichi pulls back and looks at him with a grin, wide enough that it looks like he's closing his eyes. He felt his cheeks rise in a rose color, they had kissed a while ago, but Mitchy catching him off-guard like that was unfair. Takemichi stayed on top of him, not saying anything, but he knew exactly what that kiss and that smile meant: 'Sorry, it looked like the first kiss didn't explain everything.'
Mikey just shoots him a relieved smile, as he calms down, feeling the weight over his shoulders lighten. He kissed his forehead, equally not saying anything, because he knew Takemitchy knew what this meant: 'Thank you.'
'Thank you for not lying.' a kiss on his cheek.
'Thank you for loving me.' a kiss on his nose.
'Thank you for meeting me.' a quick kiss on his lips.
And with the way Mitchy looks at him, he was sure he knew what those other kisses meant too.
He closes his eyes as he feels the entire weight of Takemichi, he is now laying completely on top of him. Manjirou inhales a bit of Mitchy scent before staring at the big, bright moon it was for some reason shining brighter than ever as if it was celebrating their day too. He wraps his arms around the boy on top and lets him rest his head on his chest.
A few moments pass, and they just stay like that. Embracing as if they weren't on the beach right now - with freezing water that was gradually reaching the tip of their legs.
"You know how you asked a while ago why I'd always know exactly when it came to you?" Mitchy started.
"Yeah?" Mikey replies, intrigued.
"You."
"Huh?"
"I know.. because it was you." Mikey hums with curious eyes, he wishes he could see Mitchy's face but the angle would only show his hair. "I don't understand?"
"I didn't understand it at first either." Takemitchy shrugs. Mikey nods even if Takemichi most likely won't see it, but him continuing anyways made Manjirou know he got the signal. "It's kind of .. hard to explain. It's a confusing concept actually. Y'know how one person knows themselves? It's kind of like that." Mikey … still didn't get it. Takemichi, feeling the silence of the man below, immediately knew he was still confused.
"Ugh, I told you it's really confusing." Takemitchy grunts, struggling to find the right words to say, but continues. "Let's just say that.. for the longest time, I've felt something missing. Something in me that I need, destined to meet. Like a complete puzzle set with only one missing piece. And .. I guess whenever I look at you, I only see a puzzle piece of myself."
Mikey doesn't say anything, instead, he just caresses Michi's arm with his thumb.
"It feels as if you were the other half of my soul. The other half of me. I just don't know. I feel connected to you on a different kind of level that I don't really.. understand. But it was always sort of proven whenever I saw you break right in front of me."
"I'd always .. feel myself breaking too. Like if I were a puzzle set I wouldn't just lose one piece, hell it'd be as if you just dropped me for all of the pieces to scatter." Mikey can feel the trembling of Mitchy's tone.
It aches Mikey's core at the very thought that Takemichi had to witness two timelines of him going berserk. That he was pained because of Mikey. He wishes he can just take all of his pains away to carry them all on his back, even if Takemichi most likely will disagree.
Still, isn't what he was talking about sort of familiar to him?
"Soulmates." Mikey firmly says after he's realized.
"What?" Mitchy threw his head back to look at Mikey who was already looking at him.
"What you're describing right now, soulmates."
"Ah."
Mikey was always intrigued by this sort of topic. There was a person out there in the world whom you'd connected the most with - whom you were always destined to meet. A person who would care for you - a perfect match for you. A person that would change your life for the better. A person for you. And, now that Mitchy mentions it... "Well, anyways, I guess what I'm trying to get is ..'' His thoughts stop as he hears the man above him speaking again. "You're my other half. If it's you, I'll always know. Even if you won't say anything, I'll always know."
He felt himself smiling as he softly brushed Takemichi's hair. He understood now .. and, likewise, if it was Takemitchy, Mikey always knew. He always will. Takemitchy was his other half too. He would crumble in pieces if he had ever left him too. Mikey just hums and hugs Mitchy tighter. Both of them wanted to say something more - to give each other more verbal reassurances, to make promises they know they'll keep.
But, even so, under the moonlight on the very same day they met years ago, they know, they'll always know. They'll always know what the other would want to say. They'll always know what the other would want the other to do.
They're half of themselves.
And if they know that far enough, that for them is all that matters.