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Eddie's like a child that gets distracted by shiny things so the guys are pretty used to him wandering off. They'll either stumble across him later or he'll suddenly reappear at their sides as if he's been there all along.
Which is why Gareth isn't worried when he turns to Eddie and finds him gone. He just nudges Jeff and rolls his eyes.
"We should put him on a fucking leash," Jeff sighs, "Might be able to actually keep track of him then."
"Nah, he's probably got some sort of kink," Grant throws in as he wiggles his eyebrows, "He'd enjoy it too much."
"Fucking grim, dude. I don't want to think about Eddie's kinks."
Gareth figures he probably shouldn't tell them what Eddie's hanky means then. Or maybe he should? He's still debating on the pros and cons of sharing that little nugget of information when Grant comes to a sudden halt next to him.
"That fucking idiot. That absolutely stupid fucking moron."
Jeff looks just as confused as Gareth feels as Grant storms away from them. It's only when they notice he's heading to Scoops Ahoy do they see a familiar head of curls standing at the counter.
"You'd think he'd have learnt the first time," Jeff shakes his head as they stumble to catch up with a fuming Grant.
"Munson!" Grant snaps, and honestly Gareth forgot how scary he was when he wanted to be.
Eddie looks back at him, spoon hanging out of his mouth, looking like a deer in the headlights.
"Eddie, man, what the fuck?" Grant jabs aggressively at the paper cup in Eddie's hand.
Gareth gets to watch Eddie come to the realisation that he just ate dairy in the most beautiful array of facial expressions. The way horror dawns on his face is truly a sight to behold.
"Is - uh - is everything okay?" Harrington looks pretty concerned at the way Grant's staring Eddie down and wow is that personal growth Gareth sees?
"Probably?" Gareth honestly has no idea how this is going to play out. Usually when Eddie's accidentally eaten dairy around them, they've been at someone's house or at the furthest, school. They've never been as far away from a private bathroom as they are now at Starcourt. "Do you know where the nearest bathrooms are?"
"There's some over on the other side of the food court, kinda under the clock. There's always a queue so you can't miss 'em."
Gareth looks at the way Eddie's face has gone pale and can see sweat beading up on his hairline.
"Yeah, queues aren't gonna work for us. Any others? Quieter ones maybe?"
Gareth watches Harrington watch Jeff and Grant talking to Eddie in low tones. They've really been working on their volume control because Gareth is like a foot away and can barely hear them. He sees the way Harrington's eyes dart from Eddie's sweaty face to the hand on his stomach, to Jeff's hand rubbing his arm, and clearly comes to the right conclusion.
"He's lack- lax- lac-, he can't eat dairy, can he?"
"Nope," Gareth pops the p, "and he really should have fucking learnt that by now."
"He gonna puke or...?"
"Other end," Gareth confirms, and serves Eddie right for being an idiot because now Gareth gets to tell his crush that he's gonna crap his pants, "and it's gonna be soon, so I really need to know where a queue-free bathroom is. There's no way he's making it home without one."
"All the bathrooms have queues," Harrington actually looks apologetic, "Literally everyone in Hawkins is here right now."
"Fuck," Gareth says, with feeling, "Guess it'll have to be a bush again."
"Again?!"
As much as Gareth would love to share that embarrassing story with Harrington right now, Eddie looks like he's on the verge of shitting himself where he stands. Harrington clearly sees that too, because he's calling a miserable-looking co-worker over to hold things down as he rounds the counter.
"Munson? There's a staff toilet in the back, just follow me."
Grant and Jeff look relieved that someone else is taking control of the situation for a change, and Gareth can't help but agree. He's heard Eddie's brutal shits far too many times to want to be anywhere near a bathroom with him.
He can hear Eddie's stomach gurgle as he shuffles behind Harrington and crosses his fingers in hopes that Eddie makes it. The two of them head into the staffroom and Jeff nods his head over to a booth.
"We're gonna be waiting a while, might as well get comfy."
They've been sat down for about 5 minutes, when Grant pipes up, "10 bucks says he didn't make it."
"Dude," Jeff laughs, "I'm not taking those chances, I saw his face."
"Hey, if anything could make him hold on, it's the fact that Steve Harrington is the one showing him to the bathroom," Gareth points out, "That's gotta be good motivation. Imagine shitting yourself in front of The Hair. Would be even worse if you have a stupid crush on him like Eddie does."
"True."
"Munson has a crush on me?" Harrington suddenly appears at their table and scares the shit out of Gareth. "Huh, interesting."
Gareth and Jeff talk over each other trying to back-pedal. They're usually so careful talking about Eddie's crushes and for Harrington to hear could be fucking dangerous.
"Woah! Calm down, it's fine! Kinda flattering, to be honest." Harrington holds his hands up like he's trying to calm a pack of rabid animals, "I just came to let you guys know we shut in half an hour, but you're free to stay until he's done. Munson said he'd be awhile."
"You sure, man?" Jeff raises his eyebrow, "I've not seen him eat that much dairy in - maybe ever? He could literally be in there for hours."
"It's fine, I gotta do all the close down anyway."
"You're a fucking saint, Harrington," Gareth grins, "I'm sure whatever's happening in that bathroom right now is brutal and I wouldn't blame you for trying to kick him out."
"Yeah, it sounded pretty rough in there," Harrington smirks, "I didn't even know the human body could make noises like that."
Jeff and Grant nod in commiseration as Gareth laughs, "You're one of us now, Harrington. Welcome to the 'I've Heard Eddie Munson Shit His Guts Out Club'. We meet once a month for therapy sessions and blackmail material."
"Sounds like a good time. Can't wait for the next meeting." Harrington walks away to relieve his co-worker of counter duties and Grant laughs.
"Can't believe Harrington actually seems like a good dude."
Jeff ends up calling his sister to come to pick him and Grant up, they're both heading off on vacation the next day so their parents didn't want them out late. He offers Gareth a ride too, but he figures at least one of them should stay and wait for Eddie and he's got nowhere to be. He even ends up helping Harrington with cleaning up for something to do, and they've just finished wiping down the last table as Eddie shakily emerges from the back.
"Munson! How you feeling man?"
"Like I just shit out everything I ate for the past month in one go," he's holding his stomach in a way that Gareth can tell means he's got a long night ahead of him. "And like I need to get home before I need to go again."
"Did you drive here?"
"We took the bus," Eddie looks so sad as he says it that Gareth wants to hug him, "I guess we've missed the last one back, so better get walking, I suppose."
"Dude, don't be stupid," Harrington looks at him like the idiot that he is, "I'll drive you guys home. It's not a problem."
"Are you sure?"
"Positive, now let's get going."
It's a slow walk to the parking lot with how tender Eddie clearly feels, and Gareth is torn between sympathy and 'you brought this on yourself, man.' Harrington keeps throwing subtle looks over his shoulder as he walks ahead of them and Gareth can't quite figure out what they mean. They've just stepped out into the cool, evening air as Eddie's stomach gives a tell-tale gurgle. Gareth immediately starts looking for a tree or bush Eddie can hide behind when Eddie freezes next to him and gasps.
"I c-can't."
"Munson?" Harrington turns around, "You good?"
"N-no," Eddie bends double and clutches his stomach, "Decidedly not g-good."
Gareth spots an ideal bush and points it out to Harrington. Gareth steps forward and mutters under his breath, "He's not gonna make it, you need to help me cover him in case anyone's here."
Between the two of them, they manage to half-drag, half-carry Eddie to the poor unsuspecting bush. Gareth turns his back and sees Harrington do the same out of the corner of his eye, as Eddie drops his pants and squats.
A wet, spluttering fart is followed by a splat as Eddie faces the consequences of his actions.
"I - ungh - 'm so fuckin' sorry 'bout this."
"It's fine Ed," Gareth sighs, "Not the first time and knowing you, not the last either."
"Wasn't talkin' to you," he grunts as more loose shit splatters below him, "Was apologising to Harrin'ton."
"Fucking rude-"
"Don't sweat it, Munson," Harrington seems genuinely chill about this entire situation, "I was on the basketball team. Trust me, I've heard - and smelled - much worse."
The splatters seem to be lessening as Eddie grunts and huffs. A pathetic little wet fart makes Gareth want to giggle, but he knows Eddie would never forgive him.
"Has - uh - has anyone got a napkin or something?"
Gareth was half expecting this to happen so he's glad he'd shoved a hand full of napkins in his pockets before they left Scoops. He pulls them out and thrusts them in Eddie's general direction.
"You're an angel, Gare-Bear."
Gareth just rolls his eyes. He hears Eddie moving around and then the sound of denim being pulled up.
"Okay, I'm good, let's go."
Harrington nods and leads them to his car. He's just got his keys out when he looks over at Eddie.
"You live at Forest Hills, right? Are you gonna be able to make it until you're home?"
"I do," Eddie rubs the back of his neck, "And I really fucking hope so, man."
Gareth graciously allows Eddie to sit in the front and climbs into the back. He notes that the seats are leather so if worst comes to worst at least they'll wipe down easily.
"Just let me know if you need me to pull over and I'll do my best."
"Thanks."
Gareth watches Eddie as Harrington pulls out of the parking lot. He can see him fidgeting and biting his lip and just knows that they're gonna be pulling over at least once before he gets home. In all fairness to Eddie though they manage to make it about halfway to the trailer park before he suddenly groans.
"Pull over. Harrington, you gotta pull over."
Harrington jerks the car to the side of the road and slams on the brakes. Eddie's got his seat belt off and is out of the car before Gareth can even blink. Eddie's clearly waited longer than he should have because he doesn't even close the door. Just climbs out and immediately pulls his pants down.
"Jesus, man," Gareth bitches through the open door, "At least take like two steps away from us."
"S-sorry, couldn't wait."
Harrington's got the radio on but even that isn't enough to cover the sounds of Eddie spraying liquid shit out of his ass. He's clearly got most of it out of his system earlier though because it's barely a minute later when he clears his throat.
"You got any more of those napkins?"
"Sorry, man," he feels kinda bad that he didn't grab more, "I gave you all of them before."
"Fuck."
Harrington leans across to rifle through his glove box and Gareth can see the hope on Eddie's face die as he comes up empty.
"I got nothing, sorry."
"Just use your fucking hanky, Ed. It'll wash."
"What, I'm supposed to just hold on to a shitty hanky the rest of the way back?" Eddie grimaces, "No thanks."
"Actually, fair point. That's gross."
Gareth sees Eddie stand and hesitantly eases his jeans back up. No wiping involved. Yikes. He shamefully clambers back in the car and buckles himself in as Steve gets back onto the road.
"I really am sorry, I shouldn't have eaten that ice cream."
"Hey, I practically forced you to have it, Munson. I'm at least a little bit to blame here."
Gareth just sits quietly in the back. He really feels like he's been intruding on the two of them this whole time. He wishes he could leave them to it, but he's kinda stuck as the world's most unexpected third wheel right now. He slouches down in his seat and tries to ignore the way Eddie's clearly trying to flirt with Harrington. The worst thing about it is that Harrington seems to be flirting back.
"I need you to pull over again. I'm so sorry."
"We're like a mile away, are you sure you can't wait?"
"I can try?"
"You've got this, Munson," Harrington smiles at Eddie, "Not long now."
Eddie's clearly struggling though. Gareth can see sweat drip down his temples and hear his stomach gurgle. They've just pulled into the road into the trailer park when Eddie whimpers.
"Ed?"
"I c-can't hold it. It h-hurts."
"You're nearly home, man. Just think of poor Harrington's car."
"I know, 'm trying."
"Munson," Harrington glances across, "If it’s that bad, just let go."
"N-no, I -" he cuts himself off with a whine.
Gareth takes his belt off and leans forward to point out Eddie's trailer to Harrington, before facing Eddie and putting a hand on his shoulder.
"Hey, man, you've got this, okay? Like 30 seconds and you're home."
Harrington pulls in by the front door and asks Eddie for his keys. When it doesn't seem like he's gonna be able to move his hands from clutching his stomach, Gareth leans over and digs about in his pocket for them.
"I'll unlock the door," he says as he shakes the keys at Harrington, "Can you like help him out of the car?"
Harrington nods and heads around to open the passenger door as Gareth unlocks Eddie's trailer. He gets the door open and turns to see Harrington practically lifting Eddie out of the car. Eddie makes it about three steps, grasping at Harrington's arm before he cries out and bends forward.
There's a sloppy squirting noise as Eddie's body gives up and he lets loose watery shit into his pants.
"Oh f-fuck," Eddie sniffles as he looks up at Harrington with big, damp eyes, "I couldn't hold it. I'm sorry."
"Hey, it's okay M- Eddie. You did so well, Eddie. Let's get you inside and you can clean up, yeah?"
Gareth has never seen Harrington look so soft or Eddie so timid. He wants to give them both a moment so heads back to the car.
"Ed? I'll see you in a few days, yeah?"
Eddie looks back at him and nods as he lets Harrington guide him into the trailer. Harrington comes back out about 10 minutes later looking flushed.
"You good, man?"
"Y-yeah," he coughs, "I'm gonna come back tomorrow and check in on him."
He sees the way Harrington touches his lips though and curses Eddie out in his head. How the fuck can he literally shit his pants in front of someone and still get kissed? Fucker.