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A Pair of Pranksters

Summary:

Includes one cheek kiss, two pranksters' gambit meters, cake, pie, ~totally flawless disguises~, and fluff.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

"Hello there, have you seen a Ms. Crocker around?” a man wearing round glasses over his square glasses asks, rubbing his shiny nose and running a finger over his mustache.

“I’m sorry to say that I have not. But I seem to be in a similar predicament. I’m looking for one Mr. John Egbert; have you seen him?” a woman wearing a fedora and oval glasses answered, stroking her mustache contemplatively.

“I’m sorry, I haven’t seen any Egberts. If it would console you though I do have some pie we can share!” And then the mysterious man who was most definitely not John Egbert whipped out a pie and smashed it into the woman who was most definitely not Jane Crocker’s face.

NotJohn’s prankster’s gambit skyrocketed.

“Hoo hoo hoo! This is quite some delicious pie you have here, stranger, but I must say that cake is far better!” And NotJane launched a cake into NotJohn’s face.

NotJane’s prankster’s gambit rose while NotJohn’s plunged.

“Yuck! Crockershit, really Jane?” NotJohn said, making a face behind all the icing. Half a second later he remembered who he was supposed to be. I mean who he was this whole time. “Oops, I mean, really stranger? Why would you use Better Crocker mix?”

“I think it’s quite delicious, stranger,” NotJane replied, mock-offended. “I don’t know what kind of personal vendetta you have against it.”

“Bluh,” was all NotJohn said back, sticking out his tongue.

“But if you hate it so much, I guess I’ll help you clean it off,” NotJane continued. She pulled off NotJohn’s glasses to reveal it was actually John all along under that flawless disguise!! (wow so shocking)

“Mr. Egbert, it was you under there all along!” NotJane exclaimed. She placed a kiss on his check (licking some of that delicious cake along the way, yumm, John was crazy to say Crocker products were shit).

“Why stranger, how brash of you to kiss me when I already have a wonderful girlfriend by the name of Jane Crocker!” John said, pushing her back lightly.

“Hoo hoo hoo! As it turns out, I was Jane all along!” Jane said, peeling off her mustache. John gasped in surprise.

“I finally found you, Jane!” John cried, pulling her into his arms.

Jane giggled, before making a face as John nuzzled his face into her hair. “John, stop, you’re getting frosting all in my hair! John!”

“PRANKSTER’S GAMBIT!” John yelled, rubbing his face all over her hair. “I AM THE ULTIMATE PRANKSTERRRR!” He raced away, laughing and dropping banana peels.

“JOHN!” Jane called after him, cyan eyes sparkling with amusement behind her glasses. “THIS ISN’T OVER! WE BOTH KNOW I’M THE ULTIMATE PRANKSTER!”

“NEVER ADMIT DEFEAT! NEVERRRRR!” John ran up the stairs as Jane gave chase, laughing the whole time.

Notes:

Anonymous asked:
could we have some johnjane, please?

http://homestuck-rarepairs.tumblr.com/post/29341184178/a-pair-of-pranksters

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