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Matty didn’t resent her. It wasn’t that. He had had plenty of time to examine how he felt about George’s girlfriend, and resentment wasn’t it. It was true, it seemed that she was always there, hanging about, eating into their “Matty and George” time, but that didn’t bother him. In fact, Matty liked having her around. She fit in rather seamlessly with him – with all of them, actually – and it was clear early on that she was a perfect complement for George. She was smart, savvy, snarky, fun, full of surprises. She kept George on his toes with her sense of adventure, but she was grounded enough to keep him in his place if he got a little too “rock star ego-y” on her. She was witty and wordy and had interesting perspectives on things; Matty always relished conversations with her. The two of them had a wonderful repartee; they agreed on many things, but even in arguments, their banter was respectful, if spirited. George quite enjoyed the show; as more of an observer than a talker, he would be endlessly amused by just watching them like a kitchen-table tennis match as they feistily debated some random point after dinner and well into the night. No, Matty didn’t resent her, and he wasn’t jealous, either: he liked her very much and really liked her for George, so it wasn’t that he wanted her for himself, or for her to get out of the picture. But there was something he couldn’t quite suss out about the relationship between the three of them, and if there was one thing Matty hated, as intelligent and intuitive as he was, it was not being able to figure something out.
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Months into their relationship, George was distracting himself by keeping busy with household chores so as not to think about how much he missed her. She had just left him again after having come for another two-week holiday. This long-distance nonsense would end soon, but in the meantime, it sucked. They saw one another as often as they could (fortunately, she – like him – had a flexible and lucrative career that allowed for this), but he couldn’t wait for her to be there with him permanently. George knew she could take care of herself, but he still felt better just thinking of having her in proximity; knowing she’d soon be under the same stars as him filled George with comfort. He chuckled to himself and started humming something by Miguel. Yep, he thought, he was whipped. George was completely, over-the-moon in love.
He was in his room folding the laundry and Matty decided to “help” by sorting everything according to the ‘new aesthetic’. “No”, Matty said, grabbing yet another black tshirt. “That’s no good anymore, right? These are all ‘old’ us; you’re not keeping this, are you?”
George scoffed. “Yes, Matthew, I’m keeping it, give it ‘ere.” He snatched the tee back from Matty, who frowned. George continued, “I am not tossing everything black and/or white just because you’ve decided to be all full-color about everything now. Black and white are still fashionable, they’re still iconic, and they’re still easy to match up with everything. So… no. You may not throw away all of my black and white things.” He smiled over at his lead singer, and got a small classic-Matty grin in return, one he’d known for well over a decade and could recognize anywhere. George’s mood brightened as he regarded his lifelong partner-in-crime, thankful for his warm companionship on what had promised to be a lonely, boring day as he waited for her to phone him from the States. “Now”, George teased, “are you here to help or hinder?”
“I’ll help”, Matty sighed, pouting playfully. He took a stack of shirts to the dresser and looked at the now-familiar framed picture of George and her set on top. Matty picked it up, rubbing his thumb back and forth over the glass over their smiling faces. In the photo, she was looking at George like he’d invented the universe, and George was looking back at her like he wished he had, to deserve the adoration she bestowed upon him. Matty gave the picture a small smile. “You miss her, yeah?” he asked. “Hard day today?”
George turned to him, still folding the jeans in his hands. “Yeah, mate, I do”, he replied. “And today’s shit. ’s okay, though. Won’t be long now. She’ll be back soon enough”. He smiled tepidly at Matty before turning back to his task. Matty put the picture frame down, stowed the shirts away, and came back over to the bed to gather another pile. They were silent for a few moments, when Matty asked quietly, “Ehm…George? I’ve been meaning to ask you. When she comes back this final time…Is she…ehm… is she… going to move in with us?”
George smiled to himself and laughed, before replying, “Dunno, mate. Don’t think so. She is moving to London though, yeah? So… I figured she could stay with us for a while until it gets sorted. Like she does when she visits. If that’s okay, of course”, he added hastily.
“Yeah, yeah! ‘Course!”, Matty answered. “Of course she’s welcome. She’s part of the family now. I just… I wasn’t sure what the plan was, y’know…long-term?” He glanced over at George, who was still smiling to himself, lost in some private daydream, and Matty realized in asking it that he was nervous; about what, he wasn’t sure. But his stomach fluttered a bit while he waited for George to answer.
George, recognizing as only inseparable friends could the weird hitch in Matty’s voice as he had asked his question, decided laundry could wait. He put down the jeans he was folding and turned to fully face his closest mate, and sat on the bed, giving Matty his full attention. He tried to replace his grin with a more serious expression to properly respect what he had imagined in his head a few times to be possibly an awkward, even difficult, conversation. He looked up into Matty’s face. And so he began it.
“Look, Matty…”, he started, and Matty cringed and made a sharp intake of breath, as if he had been waiting for this, some kind of sharp shock that he had anticipated but that still stunned him all the same. Immediately George went into protector-mode, and made to get off the bed, reaching for his small, beloved friend. “Oh, Jesus, Matty, shit, I…”
“No, no, it’s okay! It’s alright, I’m sorry”, Matty interjected, waving George down to sit back on the bed. “Didn’t mean to freak you out. I’m alright. I know what you’re going to say, that’s all. And it’s okay, George. I’m okay. Really. Go on.” Matty tried to give George his best “calm, cool, and collected” face and twisted his fingers together so that George wouldn’t see them shaking.
George’s brow furrowed. He was suddenly anxious; something he never felt with Matty, ever. George was always a little slow to speak, but now, he full-on stammered over what he was trying to say. He couldn’t get the words out the way he wanted to, the way Matty deserved to hear them, the way Matty would say it, all passion and eloquence, and in the most nonconfrontational and diplomatic way, leaving no hard feelings behind. George swallowed and went ahead anyway, feeling inadequate. He was going to sound like a jackass and hurt his best friend. “Well, I was just going to say that… you know… we’re getting older now, right? And… well… it’s just that… I mean… eventually we’re going to have serious relationships and such, yeah? And I’m not saying that she’s, like, ‘the one’ or whatever… but she might be, I dunno, I…I think she actually is, but that’s beside the point…” He swallowed again, blinking fast, looking anywhere but at Matty, and it occurred to him that he was clutching the duvet. George tried to relax his hands as he continued, “So, anyway, I mean…ehm… we eventually are going to have to, ehm, like, be in those partnerships and, like, have our own families and…houses…and time apart and…things like that, yeah? And, ehm, so… at some point we’re going to have to, ehm… like, ehm…” He faltered.
“Not live together anymore”, Matty finished for him. Decisive. Quick. To the point. Totally Matty.
George exhaled like he’d been punched in the stomach. He trained his gaze back on Matty’s and nodded, his mouth dry. “Ye---yeah”, he summoned, finally. “Yes.” George swallowed again. “That.”
“I know, mate”, Matty said, making his way toward George, stopping once he stood directly in front of him. Matty reached out and put a hand on George’s shoulder. “I knew, at some point, eventually, this would have to end, George”, he said softly. “I get it. Things change. Chapters close. People move on. This is all part of life – crazy beautiful terrifying amazing outrageous life. This… this is the stuff we write about. I knew it was coming. Didn’t think it’d be this soon, I suppose; thought we’d have more time for this ‘bachelor best mates’ bit, but…”
“Fuck, Matty, I’m sorry”, George said, and realized his eyes were welling. He didn’t really understand why he was upset to the point of crying about this – and he didn’t particularly want to analyze it too closely – but he knew that with Matty, he would never be judged or laughed at for crying, so he let the tears fall silently down his cheeks. Matty took notice and knelt down in front of George to be able to give him a proper hug. He tapped George’s knee without speaking and George opened up his legs to let Matty slide in between. Once their torsos were flush together, George wrapped his arms around Matty’s waist and Matty hugged George around his neck, both resting their head on the other’s shoulder. Matty could feel George’s tears on his shirt and he rubbed a wide circle into George’s back. “It’s okay, Georgie,” Matty said, his voice muffled by George’s thick sweater. “Don’t be sad. We’ll always be the best of friends, close as anything, still see each other all the time. We just won’t be under each other’s noses anymore. This is going to be brilliant, you’ll see. It’s going to be weird at first; different is always strange at the beginning, but change is good! And you’re in love, G. Fuck moving out of your best mate’s flat; love is the kind of shit you move mountains for.”
They broke apart, George wiping his face with his hands, while Matty rested his bum back onto his heels. “You think?”, George asked him. “Absolutely”, Matty replied, grinning wide.
“I just didn’t think this would happen so soon, mate, you know?”, George said. “I thought we’d have plenty of time. Hell, I thought – somewhere in the back of my mind – that all of us would just grow old together and have our families on some hippie commune somewhere, making music and raising farm animals and growing our own crops and letting the kids run around naked and shit”. George broke into a huge smile at the thought. Matty shuddered.
“No way, mate!”, he said. “That sounds awful. No offence”.
George looked fake-wounded at him. “Whaddya mean, no way? That sounds like a perfectly lovely life!”
Matty shook his head vehemently. “Absolutely not. I can barely survive just living with you without being crushed to a pulp. Imagine your children? Your gargantuan, human versions of a bull mastiff-labrador mix children running around wild? I’d be trampled and killed!” Matty smiled so big his eyes looked sealed shut; it was George’s favorite face of his.
George belly laughed at the description. “Yeah, I s’pose you’re right, Matty. Probably best that my pack of giant dog-breed children live…elsewhere from your porcelain, fragile self.” He poked Matty lightly in the chest, and Matty feigned falling over backwards.
“Shut up, you git!” Matty smiled back at him. “Now help me up, Gigantor”.
George got to his feet and clasped Matty’s arm, pulling him up to standing. “Well. Right. So…we’re… okay, then?” George asked, regarding Matty meaningfully.
“We’re good, George. It’s good. Everything is going to be fine. No worries”, Matty replied, squeezing George’s shoulder. He nodded toward the neglected laundry basket. “Now, about your wardrobe. Are you sure I can’t convince you to get some color into your look?” Matty pretended to be all business about this.
“No way, mate. No,” George replied. “When I wear bright colors, I either look like I belong in the circus or that I’m where the circus is being held. So… no. I will continue with my monochromatic, neutral-toned theme, thank you very much.” George winked at him.
“Suit yourself”, Matty said. George smiled and went back to folding clothes. “I’m gonna leave you to it, man. I’m going to pop down to Costa, maybe read a little, maybe write something; I’m feeling…newly inspired”, he smiled at George conspiratorially. “You want me to bring you back anything?”
“Nah, I’m good. Thanks though”, George replied, looking over at his best friend and giving him a smile and a nod that he hoped said all the things he couldn’t find the words to express right then. The smile he received back was the answer he’d hoped for.
Matty made his way out of the room. As he got to the doorway, George said, “I love you, Matty”. Matty stopped in his tracks, hand on the door frame. He turned back to look at his drummer, his brother, his soulmate, and replied, “I love you too, George. When your girlfriend calls, tell her I said hi”. He smiled and continued out the door, heading somewhere without George for what felt like the first time in his life.