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The buzz of your phone along with the slight illumination of your darkened room alerted you to a new message. You turned over in your bed. Annoyedly reaching over to grab the device, though you couldn’t sleep anyway.
Another unknown number, yet you knew exactly who it was. Cursing quietly, you placed your phone back down where it wasn’t and stared straight ahead at your ceiling in contemplation.
You had gotten a new phone, changed your number several times and completely removed yourself from any social media yet somehow, he always managed to find a way to contact you.
You tried so hard to ignore it. Every time, you would discard your phone to the side after seeing the notification or his name at the top of your phone but then, just the idea he’s messaged you would plague your thoughts until you succumbed to the overwhelming desire to message him back.
What does he want? Why is he up at this hour? Is he okay? Is it important? He knows contacting you puts you at risk, so it must be important, right?
Pointless questions conjured in your mind to the point where you thought you might lose your sanity if you didn’t pick up.
Squinting, you winced when the bright glare of your screen pierced through your eyes.
Unknown number:
hey, you up?
You wanted to punch yourself for losing sleep over him.
Slamming your phone back down where it was before, you sighed in frustration and buried your head into your pillow.
It wasn't uncommon for you to lay awake at night thinking about how things were only a couple of months ago and it was only made harder by the guilt of not being able to help your own boyfriend when he was at his lowest.
Everynight, flashes of smiles, movies, beaches, long walks, talking and laughter would replay in your mind until tears streamed down your face and you would pass out from the exhaustion.
And to make matters worse, whenever Geto would try and make contact with you, you couldn't help the swelling of your heart and the pounding of your head that screamed 'he still loves me' as you would fight every urge and every bone in your body to not message him back. In the end, your wants always conquered your needs.
Groaning frustratedly into your pillow, you heard the sound of vibrations go off by the side of your bed more than 5 times. Every part of your body that was familiar with him longed for his words in your ear and his touch on your skin again but you couldn’t. You couldn’t let yourself give into temptations.
Before, it was so easy to look at Geto and think about all the good memories the two of you shared. The dates, the long nights, the fleeting touches and passionate kisses. Now, you couldn’t think about any of that without the prominent guilt of the people he has killed creeping up on you.
The hands that once touched you so delicately were now stained with the blood of an entire village and even his parents.
Knowing all this, you still struggled not to look past it. You still struggled to restrain your mind from wandering to all the more secretive and romantic moments the two of you shared.
After a futile battle with your mind, the outcome was always the same. Picking up your phone, you sighed in annoyance with yourself as you typed out a short ‘yes’ in response.
Every time this happened, you felt so weak. Shoko and Gojo were struggling just as much with the loss of their friend, yet they’d consistently put their morals before all the moments they replayed in their minds at late hours of the night.
You paused for a second before hitting send. Was Geto even trying to communicate with either of them? You had assumed that he was trying to get a hold of all three of you, but it was such a sensitive topic none of you wanted to bring it up with each other so it was something you had all just acknowledged silently.
Not wanting to think about it any longer in case the guilt seeps further into your skin, you hit send and stared at your phone for another ten minutes waiting for his reply.
All he did was send you an address.
You bit at your lip, then your nails, then tapped your hand against your thigh anxiously. Your heart beat erratically in your chest and you could feel every part of you shaking.
Sure, you’d messaged him a few times, yet this could be the first time you’d be seeing him since he said goodbye. But, you weren’t gonna say yes, right? Messaging him and the occasional phone call was bad enough, though it could be excused as a moment of weakness. Meeting him, however, was a completely different subject with completely different consequences.
The entire time you were getting ready, you mentally scolded yourself. Everything about the situation was so wrong, and to top it off, you had even gone so far to do your makeup in an attempt to look nice and not as though you struggled to get out of bed without him.
The weather reflected your actions, rain pouring viciously from the sky and hitting the fabric of your coat as you pulled it tighter on your body. The streetlights illuminated the darkness of the streets and bounced off the rainy glow of the pavement, indicating even the weather’s distaste for your choices.
Looking up, you saw that in front of you the location Suguru had sent you, and in front of it, a tall figure leaned against the building. A fucking motel.
You had hoped he had more respect than yourself for the difference in your ideals. You had hoped he had more pride to stick to said ideals instead of fucking someone who thinks that they’re insane and psychotic.
You understood that was hypocritical of you because, for starters, you had come out in a short skirt in the pouring rain for him - your legs were trembling and wet yet you thought about nothing other than what he would think when he saw you. Secondly, it should have been you with self-respect and pride, yet they meant nothing when standing in front of you was the man who had your heart and soul in his hands.
His hands were in his pocket and his head was down before he recognised the sound of approaching footsteps over the sound of raindrops hitting the floor at a brutal pace.
“You came.” His voice sounded better in person. It was different than before, he no longer sounded tired or sad and that gave you a brief feeling of contentment. His eyes scanned your figure, and you were no longer feeling bad about wearing the skirt.
You had no idea what to say or do but stare at his face, half covered by the hood shielding him from the rain. What you did see, was just as perfect as before. “You look… good.” You settled, but your voice could barely be heard over the rain.
Understanding this and not wanting you to get ill, Geto led you inside. “I already got us a room.” He said, walking upstairs.
“Why?” You asked. Your eyes were on the floor. You hadn’t been so nervous to see or speak to him since your first year, when Shoko and Gojo teased you for having a crush on him leading to your own realisation of your feelings. Back then, you had tried to avoid looking at or talking to him for about two weeks before he backed you into a corner and forced your confession. Back then, your choices were black and white and your issues were privileges to have even if it felt like the end of the world.
He looked back at you, as though the answer was obvious. “I wanted to see you.”
Turning back around, his voice was barely over a whisper.
“But why, Suguru?”
No answer, he simply kept leading you up the stairs and into the room he had paid for. You learnt long ago not to push for answers when it came to Suguru, as frustrating as it was.
He let you into the room first and shut the door as you looked around before turning to face him when you heard the lock click. Walking up to you, he began to unzip your drenched coat and hung it up for you whilst you muttered a small ‘thank you’.
“How have you been?” You cringed at his attempt at small talk, but engaged nevertheless. It was never so awkward between the two of you, but murdering an entire village does that to a relationship.
“Fine, I suppose. And you?” You sat down on the bed, smoothing out the sheets in order to look preoccupied and unbothered.
“Well enough,” He dismissed, turning away from you to face a drawer in front of the bed that you sat down on. “And your boyfriend?”
You paused, mind reeling back to try and think about who he might be on about. Your heart was racing, as though you’d been caught cheating. But, to your knowledge, you were broken-up and free to date whoever you pleased. There was also the fact that he knows about something, and that there really was a purpose for you meeting up even if it was to discuss a boyfriend you had no knowledge of having.
“I’m sorry?”
“Saw you with some guy from Kyoto the other day.” He grumbled lowly, trying not to come off as annoyed or mad but you saw directly through him.
Yes, you had been on a few dates, trying to get over Suguru and back into dating and all that. Yet nothing stuck and you had yet to find someone you actually wanted to go on a second date with.
“Were you… following me?” You questioned. However, you were more annoyed at him for putting himself at risk by following you, than the fact that he was following you.. If the guy you were with had seen him, he wouldn’t have hesitated to report it.
“Up until that point, I might have been.” He said casually. “You didn’t answer my question.”
You couldn’t help but scoff and roll your eyes at him for being petty and jealous. “He’s not my boyfriend, Geto. Even if he was, you have no right to be jealous.”
His face contorted into one of disgust and frustration as he muttered out something unclear under his breath which you paid no attention to.
The air was thick with tension. You felt hot and suffocated, wanting nothing more than for him to say something. Something to distract you from everything like he would all those times before, when you would lay in bed, staring up at the ceiling and talk about nothing in particular.
He turned to face you again, his eyes moving over your entire body yet again. His burning stare felt thrilling, you had longed to feel it on you again.
Tilting his head at you, he smirked and asked, “You wear this f’me?”
All you could do was nod as your eyes met his. He hummed in acknowledgement, and it became apparent to you that he was holding himself back from you.
“I don’t wanna see you with that Kyoto guy again, you hear me? If I do, neither you nor him will enjoy what happens.”
A part of you was enjoying the sight of his jealous glare and serious eyes as he threatened you. In fact, you only ended up bringing your legs together and squeezing, hoping he wouldn’t notice. However, the part of you that still resented him for leaving you was annoyed that he was jealous as though he had any right to be.
“You don’t get to ask that of me, Geto. It was you who left, you should’ve thought about the consequences of that.”
Taking your cheek in his hand and caressing it gently, a small smile crept up on his lips as he was met with no resistance. However, as though it was never even there, it disappeared within moments as his grip tightened and his voice lowered. “You don’t get to hold that against me.”
“Suguru, you left me behind to pursue a life of murdering innocent people, I’ll hold that against you until the day I die because I hate you for it.”
He dropped his hand and pressed his lips into a tight line before bringing the same hand back up to play with your hair. “You hate me?” He asked, though it almost didn’t sound like a question, and more of a statement of disbelief, as it was followed by a short, humourless laugh before he continued. “If you hate me, why are you here? Why’d you dress up hoping to impress me? Why did you pick up the phone in the first place?”
“I still care for you Suguru. Up until a few months ago, I thought you were it for me.” Your voice broke but you refused to cry, closing your eyes tightly and tilting your head down.
Truthfully, Geto had thought the same. He still thinks you're the one for him, it’s why he hasn’t cut contact with you.
“Can I ask you a question Suguru?” He didn’t reply, but his eyes were on yours waiting for you to ask so he could decide whether he would answer. “Have you been talking to Shoko and Gojo?”
He dropped the piece of hair that he played with as he considered how honest his answer should be. “No, just you.” He replied truthfully. “They mean a lot to me, but I love you.”
You stood up, unable to take anymore as you went to grab your coat and leave. You couldn’t comprehend his words, only confusing Geto, and yourself, further.
He loves you. He says he loves you. Why don’t you believe him?
“If you love me, why haven’t you cut contact with me? You know how much danger this puts me in! If anyone finds out, I’m fucking screwed, Suguru. You don’t love me-”
Taking your coat from your hands, he threw it across the floor and took your arms in his hands, his touch gentle yet conveying his message.
“Don’t. Don’t tell me what I feel for you, because trust me, I know. I also know that after everything I’ve done and everything I am doing it’s impossible for you to believe me but I need to be near you and I need you to understand that you are mine. No matter what, you are mine.”
Now, your back was against the door. He was towering over you and your faces were impossibly close. You felt each of his breaths hit your face and become one with your own. You felt your eyes go wide and your breathing go heavy as you struggled to find a response.
Instead, you just kissed him. He tasted the same as, if not even better than, before. Ever since the kiss you shared, you had felt as though your lips were made to meet his.
One of his hands had moved from your arm to press against the door as he trapped you within his arms. Your own was brought up to his hair to thread your fingers through it and pull him closer.
Pulling away, he used his other hand to move your hair back thoughtlessly. “Stay.” Was all he said, yet you didn’t need any more as you pulled him back in for another kiss, taking your shoes off with the heel of your other foot and trying desperately to help him take his own jacket off.
He picked you up and placed you gently in the centre of the bed. You lifted your arms up as you helped him take off your shirt before he littered kissed all over your chest.
“God, I missed this so much, baby.”
You couldn’t spare the effort for a passive aggressive comment or a harsh remark about him leaving you. All you could do was sigh heavily as he sucked bruises into your skin and left open mouthed kisses against your chest.
He fiddled with the hem of your skirt as a silent plea for you to spread your legs, to which you had no problem complying with.
The way his lips trailed across your skin, pressing kisses and worshipping every crevice of your body had your heart thumping and your mind racing as you struggled to contain the whimpers that fell from your frowned lips.
You struggled to keep your eyes open yet you fought anyway as the sight of Geto between your legs was always a sight that you had adored.
His hands embraced your thighs as he held them apart from each other whilst he kissed down your legs before he reached your soaking cunt.
His mouth was hot against your clothed pussy and he began to leave kisses onto your cunt through your panties, leaving you a desperate, aching mess.
Moaning out for him to touch you properly, he looked up at you with a devilish smirk plastered on his face before he continued to kiss you through your laced panties.
Impatiently, you bucked your hips up to meet his face to which he only tutted before dragging the lace down your thighs and tossing it to the side of the room before he began to tease your dripping pussy once more. “You’ve had no idea how much I’ve thought about this pussy - so fucking perfect.” He said, planting kisses around your core and sighing deeply between your legs.
“Sugu- please I need you to touch me.” You begged, growing tired of his infuriating teasing and just wanting to feel him against you again.
Truthfully, you were torn between needing him now and wanting to take it at a slower pace in order to lengthen the amount of time you’d be with him. However, you were so overcome with pleasure that you decided to leave savouring every minute with him until he was actually pleasuring you.
“Whatever you want, Princess.” He joked, before his mouth attached to your pussy.
You gasped at the feeling, unable to contain the noises he withdrew from your lips.
Geto played with your soaking pussy expertly, knowing every right flick of the tongue and his timing was almost godly - this had always been the case.
Often, he’d have you aching, heaving and moaning from just sitting you down on his tongue.
The sound of slurping bounced off the walls and rang in your ears and if you didn’t know any better - if you didn’t feel the way he was using his tongue against you - you would have assumed he was a starved man drinking his first drink in days.
His tongue moved flawlessly before he added a singular finger inside of you and curled - then deciding to add another. His long, slender fingers reached places you hadn’t been able to in a while.
Your legs wrapped around his head, pulling him in desperately, yet he didn’t seem to mind, he simply just kept a large hand splayed out on your thigh as he squeezed and pawed at the flesh.
The combination of his tongue toying with your clit and his fingers scissoring and curling inside of you was enough to have you squirming in his hold and spewing out incoherent warnings about your oncoming release.
Geto seemed to understand however, to your soon-to-be dismay.
He pulled away, wiping away at his mouth politely as though he sat in a fancy dining hall eating a meal made by the best chefs and not in a cheap motel with his head buried in between your legs.
“Sorry, baby, want you to come on my dick first.” He said in such a casual manner it infuriated you.
You whined out his name, begging him to allow you your release because of how close you were, yet your pleas fell on deaf ears as he began to take off his own clothes, hinting at you to remove your skirt and top.
The minute you were both stripped off your clothing, you were back on each other instantly. He kissed you urgently as though you were close to slipping away as his hands travelled everywhere. They ran up your hips, up your stomach and across your chest, pawing at your breasts as his lips stayed connected to yours.
“Need you inside, Sugu-” You pleaded with wide, yearning eyes.
His dick throbbed at the sound of you sweet voice asking for him to fuck you as he complied instantly by aligning his aching dick with your hole.
The pain of his dick entering you slowly soon melted into the same pleasure you had longed to feel for months on end. The familiar feeling of his veiny, lengthy cock sliding against your walls at a torturous pace - helping you to warm up to the prominent stretch his cock provided.
There’s slick smeared along your thighs from how wet you were from all of the built up frustration and longing for his dick.
It was overwhelming, the way his hips were slowly picking up pace and force with every thrust. All that can leave your mouth are the pathetic whimpers he draws from you as he leaves you speechless.
After a few moments of waiting for you to adjust, he loses all will to restrain himself and releases the same built up frustration that’s also been tormenting you. He’s borderline bullying his thick cock into your tight walls with little remorse, and if you didn’t know Suguru like you do, you would have assumed that every thrust was laced with selfish intent of getting himself to finish. However, the way his hand moved down your body and his thumb latched onto your clit, you knew he had nothing but your pleasure in his mind as though it was his own.
The sounds of slapping sped up within the fall walls of the rented room, along with the wet sounds of his dick dragging in and out of your pussy. However, your moans were competing to drown out the sounds.
You were trying to keep quiet, aware somebody could be in the room next to you, but when his dick was repetitively hitting your sweet spot and his thumb would occasionally slip in between your sweating, hot bodies to rub at your clit harshly, it was impossible to keep any noises from slipping beyond your throat.
Those thoughts were slipping away from your mind, along with all other thoughts and reasons as he fucked you dumb.
However, again, you knew Suguru well. From his harsh thrusts, he way his thumb rubbed viciously on your clit and how his spare hand had a possessive grip on your hip, you could tell he was fucking his feelings out into you. There was something bothering him, something he needed to resolve by fucking you - a point he needed to make.
His eyes, previously screwed shut with the scrunch of his concentrated face, opened lazily. He stared at you with half-lidded eyes yet you could feel the coldness that came through his stare - his gaze was bitter and angered.
Geto’s hair tickled the side of your face as he leaned in, causing your legs to stretch further upwards. When he whispered, his voice was soft yet laced with malice and vicious intent. “You think that Kyoto guy could fuck you like this? You think he could reach this deep inside of you?”
Oh. You should have known.
You shook your head profusely, unable to form an actual coherent response or a jab at him for still thinking about some guy you went on one date with. Though, if this was the reaction that was elicited every time from Geto, you had no problems with planning a second date - you’d think about that when your brain wasn’t turning into mush from his dick pummelling into you at a ruthless speed.
Perhaps that was his goal, to fuck you dumb and then ask you a question you’d have no strength or will power to contemplate.
“Good girl. Nobody can fuck you like this. You might think it’s unfair, you might think I’m being jealous and controlling, but if I catch you with that Kyoto guy again - or any guy as a matter of fact, I will fucking kill him. And don’t you dare think I won't. I’ll kill him - I’ll kill them all - and I'll make you watch. Then, I’ll fuck you right after. You hear me?”
You looked at him with wide, fearful eyes, yet your pussy only tightened around his cock and your head only nodded in understanding.
He had a feeling he said the wrong thing, and that he might scare you off, yet there was every bit of truth to his words. You were his, not some no-named guy who wouldn’t even be able to give you a fraction of the pleasure he was giving you at the moment. Nevertheless, he had a deeper feeling within that his words would sink in more post-sex, considering you weren’t necessarily fond of his new lifestyle.
For now, he just kept thrusting his dick into your aching pussy and kissing your lips sweetly in contrast to the hard pace that he had set.
Your hands were clawing at whatever they could touch, grasping for some sort of control back as he had taken it all from you with just a few thrusts of his dick.
You could feel the low grunts and vibrations from his voice against your neck as he continued to pound into your pussy, strings of curse words falling from his lips which were your neck kissing desperately in between grunts, and words. Usually, this meant he was close as he grew less shy about the noises he made and more desperate for release.
“Shit- I’m gonna breed you, baby. Gonna knock you up and show all those other men that you’re mine. You okay with that? You gonna let me cum inside you ‘nd give you a baby ‘nd make you mine, hm?”
Slightly taken aback, you couldn’t help but nod and beg him to fill you up - wanting nothing more than all of him and unwilling to settle for anything less. “Yes - want it so bad Sugu, want you to fill me up and make me yours. Please, Suguru.”
“Fuck, you’re mine. You’re mine ‘nd everyone’s gonna know that when I knock you up. You’re gonna look so pretty filled with my cum, baby, and even better with my baby– Shit!”
His hips stuttered at the feeling of you squeezing around him, reaching your release as you moaned and cursed his name at the thought of him finishing inside of you. Keeping his promise, he followed through and came inside of you, his hand on your clit moving to squeeze your hip with a bruising strength.
He pulled out, watching his cum pour out of you. “Gonna have to go for a couple more rounds, sweetheart, if I wanna keep my promise and fill you up.” He smirked, his fingers shoving themselves inside of you in an attempt to keep you full.
You kissed the smirk on his face, and before you could pull away to look at him, he captured your lips into a soft kiss once more and pressed his forehead against yours. Pulling away, you took your hand and brushed a strand of hair that had fallen free out of his face before resting your hand on his flushed cheek.
“I could go a few more rounds.” You laughed.
The sun filtered in through the curtains the very next morning.
Turning over, you felt the familiar, yet recently unfamiliar, feeling of a muscled arm beneath your head, and you were met with the sight of a bare chest and eyes burning holes into your skin. You squint your eyes, aiming to relieve yourself from the sensation of exhaustion still buried in the back of your mind.
For a moment, you had forgotten that this would be the last moment the two of you had, and was merely a goodbye - to you it was, at least.
Geto hadn’t been able to stop staring at you all morning, especially after his slipup last night about the whole Kyoto guy thing, he didn’t want to scare you and was worried about your unusual tolerance with what he had admitted was just a part of the post-sex haze. He really didn’t want to argue with you before you both separated ways - even though he didn’t plan for this to be the last time he sees you, unbeknownst to you.
For Geto, he’d be calling you unexpectedly a lot more often now he’s had a fresh taste of what he had left behind.