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Jacinth didn't want to let her go. His arms wrapped around her shoulders and squeezed her so tight, as though he could make up for ten years of lost affection in a single instant. She was a few inches taller but she all but melted into him, nuzzling her nose against his neck and breathing him in. Her hands clutched at his broad shoulders, her claw-like nails digging into his leather armor. Karlach released a long, shaky breath, as though holding back the urge to cry into his shoulder. He pulled back just enough to press a kiss to her forehead, lips finding the softer space between her horns. Jacinth nuzzled his nose against her and breathed her in. She was still so warm, as though running a high fever. But he could touch her. He could hold her. He could kiss her. There was nothing keeping them apart any longer.
"Thank you," Karlach whispered against his skin, breath ghosting across his neck. She withdrew only to close the distance between their lips, her nose brushing against his before her full, slightly chapped lips pressed to his. The feel of her made him dizzy, his head a rush of longing. "Look at that. No burns." She laughed to herself as she said, "Can we go to bed now?"
Jacinth laughed and nodded, his hand finding her waist and refusing to let her leave his side as Dammon gave them his bad news. Her engine was burning out and it was only a matter of time before it took her with it. Unless-
"I'd rather die," she said resolutely, a fire in her eyes that wasn't from the machinery within her.
"I get that," Dammon said quickly, "But this world might just be better with you in it, even in Avernus."
She didn't want to talk about it. She didn't want to think about how short-lived her newfound freedom might be. Not when she finally had love and the gift of touch back for the first time in a decade. Jacinth didn't want her upset but he knew at some point they would have to talk about it. Her choice mattered most, he refused to deny her agency any further. But death… he knew death in a sickeningly intimate way. He wanted to keep her alive, bright and beautiful and brilliant, by any means necessary. He wanted to give her the stars and the sunshine and the sea and if they had to endure the hells for a little longer, just to make things right… well…
A conversation for later.
They returned to their camp behind the inn. Promises were made to wait until the others had settled in, and then they'd find each other. It felt like he had waited a lifetime to be with her, fate finally aligned for them to be here in this place at this moment on this night.
Everything had brought him to her.
"I'm yours, Karlach," he pledged.
She breathed deeply, eyes fluttering closed. "My name sounds so good in your mouth."
"Karlach," he whispered, closing the space between them. His hands found her waist, his steady hands taking in the shape of her: scarred skin pulled taut over the strongest muscle he'd ever seen.
She took his face in her hands as she kissed him, gentle at first before a decade of desperate longing took hold. Jacinth moaned against her mouth as they kissed each other roughly, noses bumping and teeth clicking. Her thumbs caressed his cheek and the scar that webbed out from the bridge of his nose down towards his jaw. She sucked hard on his lower lip, her teeth grazing against soft flesh. Karlach threaded her fingers into his hair, tender before she clutched his auburn strands, pulling his head back so that she could trail kisses down his chin and along his throat. Her lips pressed to his pulse and she sighed a shaky breath against him, sending shivers down Jacinth’s spine.
They retreated to her tent. The rush to remove their clothes left them both suddenly naked and staring at each other's frames. A panic touched Jacinth's heart as he faltered. Had he ever made love before? Had he ever touched someone with reverence for their warm, living body? Had every physical encounter ended with his hands slick with blood?
Karlach could sense his overthinking. She moved towards him on her hands and knees, reaching out to take his cheek in her hand as she straddled his hips. Gods, they both looked a mess. Jacinth's body resembled a well-loved doll’s, his torso a mess of seams that seemed as though he had been taken apart and pieced back together. Karlach's was a tapestry of war, flesh scarred from burns and lacerations innumerable as the engine beat in her chest. It was a wonder either of them had made it this far. And yet, here they were. Two people broken by life and left to put themselves back together, now with help.
She kissed him and the flames within burned hotter. A fierce and gorgeous sapphire glow radiated out from her core, brightening her already stunning smile. He could feel himself falling even more madly in love with her.
He savoured the way she felt against him, skin to skin. For a moment they just held each other, tracing fingertips along jawlines and pressing tender lips to rough skin. The urgency had slowed almost to a halt. Jacinth cradled her cheek in his hand, thumb smoothing over the few freckles that dotted her skin. Relics of the girl she used to be.
"I have to be honest," he said softly. "I'm not sure if I remember how to do this next part or not."
"Do you still want to do this?" she asked, her eyes looking between his own for signs of hesitation.
"Yes," he promised.
"Good. You know, I've been enamoured with you since we met, right?"
"Heh. The feeling is mutual."
"I'm glad. So glad for that."
Her hand moved over top of his as she turned her face to kiss his palm. She threaded their fingers together and moved his hand to her lower belly, just above her groin.
"Touch me," she breathed out, moving his hand lower and guiding his fingers to rub against her.
Jacinth's thumb rolled over her clit and she all but choked on the gasping breath that left her, her voice tangling in the space between them. He licked at his lips as he found a rhythm that she rolled her hips into, his middle finger dipping into her cunt. Karlach's eyes closed as the sapphire glow of her heat illuminated the tent. A smirk tugged at his features as he laid back fully.
"Come closer, Karlach," he said. "Let me taste you."
She blinked into a wide stare and her tail flicked behind her. "Oh, fuck yes."
He smiled brightly as she positioned herself over his face, spread wide as he moved to take her in his lips. He parted her folds and he moaned as her hot slick coated his tongue. His brain, so full of holes with a worm wriggling between them, had no memory of sex or love before this. But Karlach wasn't afraid to give directions, and Jacinth was more than happy to please. He sucked hard on her clit as his tongue drew delicate shapes against her, a few proving more effective than others if the sounds she made were anything to go by. He released her to breathe and drank her in, dipping his tongue into her cunt as much as possible before returning the focus to her clit.
It didn't take long for her to come. Ten years being pent up had turned her into a tightly coiled spring just waiting to be released.
"Fuck me," she said, breathless. "You feel so good, Jay."
He hummed as she ground against his tongue, drawing out the orgasm as her body gently trembled. She pulled back to let him come up for air, and watched as he wiped her slick from his chin, licking his lips clean. His hands found her hips and he pushed her into his lap, palms roving over the taut plane of her back as he craned his neck to kiss her. She kissed him back roughly, almost hungrily, her lips firmly planted on his and her hands clutching at his arms. Her nails bit into his skin before she eased up.
“I want to touch you,” Karlach said, her desperation just shy of a whisper. “I want to feel every part of you.”
“I want that,” he affirmed. “I want you, Karlach.”
Her hands found his chest and pressed him into the unkempt bedroll. Karlach moved to sit between his outstretched legs, running her hands across his thighs, thumbs tracing along stretchmarks that spoke of growth spurts in his youth, before digging into strong muscle that she’d seen him use to firmly plant himself between his friends and foes, a Paladin’s shield carrying his forgotten Oath of Vengeance. An Oath broken by kindness, of all things.
Jacinth swallowed as she neared his center, her thumb finding his clit and rolling over its little bud. She played with it for a moment, testing how much pressure and what shapes pulled out the strongest reaction from him.
Jacinth’s lower lip caught between his teeth as he sat up on his forearms to watch her, a sly focus in her gaze as she glanced from her efforts to his eyes. She held his look as she turned her wrist, her middle two fingers parting through his folds, and then she grinned.
“So wet, and I’ve only just touched you,” she noted. “I’m flattered.”
“You have no idea what you do to me,” he said, his breath catching in his throat as she dipped into his cunt. Jacinth’s eyes closed as she pressed into him, ever mindful of the shape of her nails. She pumped in and out carefully, her thumb taking over the work on his clit as she pushed him back once more.
He gasped as her tongue trailed up his throat. Beads of sweat dotted his temples as his body reacted to the way she kissed his skin, her fingers relentless as he arched his back and his hips moved to meet her hand. Her free hand’s fingers laced into his hair and gently took hold of his auburn strands, gathering them in a fist and tugging him back so she could trail kisses up his neck and beneath his chin. She pulled his hair and he moaned out her name as she dragged the points of her sharp canines down to his shoulder.
How dare she believe she has control over you, you are no one’s plaything! Tear her apart, rip her horn from her skull and plunge it into her chest!
Jacinth’s eyes snapped open to stare at the top of the tent, his body stilling as he forced the increasingly louder intrusions to leave him be. His eyes stung from the betrayal, tears he refused to shed, refused to give the Urge that power over him. No. Not tonight, he wanted to plead, not now, not when everything has been so perfect.
Karlach slowed as she noticed his sudden derailing thoughts, her fingers all but stopping save for her thumb gently rolling over his clit. Her breath in his ear sent a shiver down his spine as she spoke. “Darling?”
“It’s fine,” he promised her and himself. He breathed deeply, clenching and unclenching his fists. Nothing bad would happen tonight. Everything would be all right. He was in control. Jacinth moved his hips against her hand, almost desperate for the distraction and the feel of her. “Please don’t stop.”
She ran an experimental digit along his inner ridge, pressing into an especially sensitive part of his cunt. “You’re sure?”
He turned his head to meet her gaze, offering a smile before taking her face in his hand to guide their lips together. She tasted like home, or what he imagined it might be like. Warmth and comfort, like something he didn’t realize was missing from himself had been returned. “Yes.”
She accepted this and kissed him again, gentle as she slowly returned to the pace she’d been sustaining before the diversion, then rougher as she pulled his hair and sucked on his throat, leaving a trail of love-bites as Jacinth began to writhe beneath her. He moaned out Karlach’s name as the tension built in his core, a pressure rising and rising within him and aching for release.
“I’m so close,” he begged, his hand finding her cheek and pulling her face up to his. His lips were parted as his breathing became increasingly ragged. “Karlach, please…”
“Come for me, baby,” she said so softly, her free hand moving to cradle his cheek, her thumb tracing his scars. Jacinth gasped as she slipped her fingers loose to focus on his clit, the heat and slick just enough to tip him over the edge. Karlach grinned as his body shook beneath her and his voice caught in his throat, a final moan escaping his lips that she silenced with a kiss. Jacinth whimpered against her, his hips desperately meeting her touch to draw out the pleasure of her hands on him, until finally it began to subside.
Jacinth was breathless as he finally fell still, his chest almost heaving as she lay on top of him. He carded through her hair as she brought her hand to her lips, making sure he was watching as she licked each finger clean of the sticky remains of her taking him for herself.
“Karlach…” he managed after a moment.
“Jacinth,” she said, a smug pride glittering in her gaze.
He took a deep, steadying breath as his hands rested at the base of her tail, fingers running along the little ridges. “I think I saw stars.”
She giggled as she folded her arms, resting them on his chest and settling her chin on top. “Oh, yeah?”
“Yeah.”
“Guess I did pretty good, then.”
“More than good,” he said, dragging his hand up and down her spine. She closed her eyes as she relaxed into the touch, shifting her arms so that she could rest the hornless side of her head between his breasts, listening to the sound of his heartbeat returning to normal. “You’re perfect.”
She laughed through her nose. “Hardly, but I’ll gladly accept the flattery.”
“Good. Because I don’t plan on stopping.”
“That a promise?”
“Absolutely.”
"Heh, maybe next time I won't finish so fast."
"Do you want to go again?"
"No. I think I'm sated for now." She nuzzled against his skin, breathing him in. "I like this."
"Yeah. I do, too."
For a while they settled into each other, naked skin against skin, scars and pain cast aside and the azure hue in the space between them falling back to a warm glow. Karlach was at ease, the tip of her tail gently fidgeting while the fingers of her left hand traced along the shape of his shoulder. Jacinth let his eyes close as he held her close, relishing in the warmth of her. There was something so loud in the back of his mind, disgusted by this tenderness. Disgusted that he’d let anyone so close, that the heat in his hands wasn’t her blood.
She sighed against him as her breathing became steadier, fatigue taking hold. “Jay?”
Her voice briefly banished the intrusive Urge from his mind. “Yeah?”
“Thank you.”
He smiled and moved to kiss the top of her head. She hummed and gently squeezed him. “I hope you know I have every intention of making this a regular occasion, if you’re okay with that.”
“I definitely am.”
“Good.”
There was the briefest lull before he felt her start to speak, then cut herself off. He gave her waist an encouraging squeeze. “You know something?”
“What’s that?”
“If I died right now, I think I’d be perfectly content with that.”
He swallowed as the thoughts grew louder. He crushed his eyes closed and did his best to focus on the present. He counted silently to seven: himself and each of his companions at the camp. Jacinth, Lae’zel, Shadowheart, Astarion, Gale, Wyll- “Karlach…”
“I know.” She sighed, giving him a squeeze. “I’m sorry, just… had to get it out of me.”
The quiet between them was caught up in the reality check that they’d tried to leave outside of the tent. The small confession blossomed in his mind into something dark and terrible, the Urge delighted by the invitation to end a perfectly fine evening in tragedy. Jacinth gently touched Karlach’s side, counting to seven with each small tap. Then again.
“I want you to live,” he managed, his voice stuck in his throat so that it was just a breathy whisper. A headache pressed behind his eyes, his vision starting to swim.
“Hey,” she said, lifting herself up to look at him, her gaze so tender. She took his face in her hands, smoothing her thumbs over the numerous freckles that made constellations on his pale skin. Karlach pressed her forehead to his, nuzzling gently. “I’m alive. So alive, it's all because of you I'm still here. I didn’t mean to stress you out about that, I’m sorry.”
“I know,” he said softly. “Can you say it again for me, please? That you’re alive?”
Karlach smiled. “I’m alive. And I’m not going anywhere for a while yet.”
“You’re alive.”
“I’m alive.”
The gentle glow behind her eyes from her engine so briefly blazed blue before calming. Soft lips met his and that perfect reminder that at least in this moment they were okay quieted his mind. The thoughts weren’t gone. Never gone. Only subdued.
He kissed her seven times. Once in the center of her forehead, once on each eyelid, her nose, on each cheek, and then her lips. She smiled as she kissed him back and nuzzled into his skin. They became a tangle of limbs in the dark, holding each other as the night claimed them.
When Jacinth awoke, he was alone.
The briefest panic took hold, but all was quiet. His hands were as clean as they were the night before. He took a deep breath and steadied himself, then glanced at the clothes left behind in a heap in the corner of Karlach’s tent. Her gear was gone. He could only assume she was wearing it. How long had he been asleep for, that she’d already left and gotten ready?
He poked his head out of the tent once he was mostly clothed. He needed a bath in the river, if he could get one. His companions were gathered together by the campfire, Scratch gnawing on a bone while Gale made breakfast for the team. Even Halsin has come over. Jacinth frowned as he counted them. Himself, Lae’zel, Shadowheart, Astarion, Gale, Wyll…
“Where’s Karlach?” he asked.
“She’s been running laps ‘round the camp all morning,” Wyll said.
“You’ll have to try harder to wear her out next time,” Astarion quipped, ever with his nose in the others’ business. “Looks like you had a good time, though. I admit, I'm a bit jealous I wasn't the one with teeth at your throat.”
Jacinth didn’t bother hiding the way his cheeks flushed as he remembered his previous evening and the marks that had surely been left behind. He simply glanced away and looked for his partner.
“She’ll be back around soon enough,” Wyll assured him with a smile. “Go on and get yourself ready for the day.”
“Right. Thank you,” Jacinth said, a bit filled with nerves as he wandered to the waterfall. He stripped off his clothes and was quick to stand beneath the rushing water, letting his back and shoulder muscles be pounded by the intensity of it. The noise of it was a blessing, helping to drown out the thoughts gathering once more in the back of his mind. He longed for the previous night, the blissful heat of body against body and the tenderness of being held like something precious. That he could be something precious… he wanted it so badly. But Jacinth fretted over whether or not he’d managed to fuck something up, something that might have caused her to slip away…
The worrying was ultimately pointless. Jacinth was quick to put on his gear after washing and he found Karlach easily enough back by her tent, eyes closed and swaying gently back and forth with a smile on her face as she sang to herself. She’s alive, was the only thing he cared about.
He watched her for a moment, delighted by the sight of her in her own little world, seemingly without any worries at all. She was truly a marvel to behold in a place as cursed as these lands.
Karlach’s eyes opened and she almost startled at the sight of him. "Oh! Sorry, didn't see you there. Was in my own little world there. Did you sleep well?"
Jacinth smiled and gave a nod. "I did. Very well, in fact."
She beamed. "Me too. I, uh." Her eyes fell to the ground before she looked back up at him. "I'm sorry I didn't wait around this morning. I wanted to but I was still just buzzing from last night."
"Wyll mentioned you were doing laps around camp."
"Yeah, well. Better than trying to sit on my hands. I can't stop thinking about last night. Getting to touch you was…" She smiled and breathed like she was smelling fresh air for the first time. "It was everything I hoped for." A bit of nerves touched her. "You still like me, right?"
Jacinth laughed through his nose as he moved to take her hand in his. "I much more than 'like you', Karlach," he assured her.
Her smile touched her eyes as she rocked on her heels. "Heh, I much more than like you, too. And… nothing bad is gonna happen now, right?"
He offered her a gentle smile, forcing his eyes to not glance at her chest and give away the tell. "Given our current track record, I think trouble will find us regardless. But we'll face it together."
She grinned. "In that case, bring it on!"
The brightness of her smile was near infectious. Jacinth could hardly stop what surely was the most love-sick and dopey look on his face. It infuriated the Urge within, and made him love Karlach all the more for it.
"I adore you, you know," she said, something unspoken beneath the gentle declaration as she took a step closer to him.
He smiled as he felt some boldness building inside of him. Jacinth tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and trailed the back of his fingers down her cheek. "Karlach… I love you."
"I LOVE YOU TOO!" she blurted out before she could hit the brakes. Karlach laughed almost uncontrollably as she took in what she'd done. "Oh, I have been dying to say that."
"You have?" Jacinth's eyes widened and his even smile broke into a grin as her words filled him with a lightness he had never believed he could feel before. She loved him. He could be loved.
She nodded and flapped her right hand, part shaking off the nerves and part trying to cool off the heat that had risen to her face. "Gods, if I smile any bigger my face is going to crack."
He closed the distance between them and kissed her fiercely. Karlach threw herself into him, almost knocking him over. But he caught her by the waist, wrapping his arms around her and lifting her off the ground. She giggled as he spun her around, pressing her forehead to his and still smiling so big and bright and beautiful. Jacinth knew that he would do anything for that smile.
"Oh, I'm pathetic," she said as he let her back down to the ground, her arms still loosely draped about his neck. "Besotted. And it's all your fault!"
She punctuated this with another kiss. Jacinth was all but dizzy from the rush of emotion overwhelming him. His past and her future didn't matter now. For this perfect moment all he had to do was be loved. Whatever they weathered next, the Absolute or his curse or her engine, was a challenge they'd be sure to overcome, simply because they had each other.
"Well, we'd better get the day on! So much to do, so much to see. Together."
Jacinth grinned and pressed a kiss to her forehead, eyes, nose, cheeks, lips. There. Now, everything could be all right.