Chapter Text
Chapter one
Alex stepped into The Goldfish Bar wearing his infamous black leather jacket and those Top Gun glasses Nora always claimed made him look like an absolute douchebag. His hair was damp and curly, the strands falling strategically around his chiselled face. He looked beautiful with the soft golden light falling on and all around him.
He stood at the entrance, taking in the setting. It was a small and simple bar, like the kind he went to in Texas before he had the money to afford anything better.
He was confused as to why Nora wanted them to meet there, but he didn’t question it, he knew with her there was always a meaning behind the madness.
He walked through the bar, passing a drunken man who had something resembling Mac & Cheese stuck to his face, and a woman who looked like she did not want to be there. Alex glanced at them, caught the woman’s eye and gave her a smile, a sympathetic one but it didn’t look like she cared when her eyes widened and her face filled with colour at the sight of him. She seemed to know exactly who he was. He figured it was because of last month’s Cosmopolitan shoot where he posed nude with nothing but a big orange pumpkin hiding his privates. He winked at her and she almost lost the ability to breathe. The man with her was too drunk and slow to understand what happened, he looked over his shoulder only to catch a glimpse of Alex sauntering away.
Right at the last booth in a dark corner, Nora sat cuddled up beside Bea. They looked cosy but Alex couldn’t help but wonder if they feared getting harassed and photographed by the people around them. It wouldn’t have been a shocker if they did, Nora was the daughter of the Vice President of the United states, and her girlfriend was the frontman of one of the most famous female lead bands in the entire world… right behind Paramore of course. The first week into their relationship they were spotted together by locals leaving a hotel in Vancouver, the news spread like wildfire and within 24 hours of that, they were run through by every single news outlet Alex could think of. It was a brutal time for the both of them but Alex got to see more of what Nora was going through given that they lived about five minutes away from each other and were best friends since senior year, and quick flames in college, so he was more protective and sympathetic towards her… not that he wasn’t ready to punch any son of a bitch that so much as breathed in Bea’s direction.
His phone lit up with a message from June on his way to the booth, telling him she would be there in about five minutes.
“Cut it out. Some of us are single.” He said in lieu of hello as he got to the table. He took his glasses off and tucked them away, revealing his soft amber eyes and those insanely long lashes Nora was always jealous of.
The girls laughed and pulled away from each other as he slid into the empty spot beside Nora. He smelled like he took a bath in the most expensive oils. If Nora hadn’t been in a committed relationship she would’ve thought about breaking her ‘don’t hook up with your exes’ rule, but then again, as good as Alex looked and smelled, she couldn’t honestly picture herself with anyone but Bea. They were only together for three months but Nora could already see herself falling for Bea in ways she never did for any of her exes.
“June’s gonna be here in 5.” Alex notified them as he threw an arm around Nora, not touching her but keeping it stationed on the back of the red leathered bunk.
“And Henry”— Bea started, that name catching all of Alex’s attention— “didn’t say shit about when he’d be here.”
Henry Fox, Bea’s devastatingly handsome younger brother was a year older than Alex. He was an Actor, critically acclaimed at the age of 29 with one award away from an EGOT, so famous that he couldn’t take a walk out in the park without attracting hoards of young women wanting pictures and autographs. Alex always strived to become the man Henry was; loved by millions for his work, poised and delicate with an unwavering sense of confidence that allowed him to get every huge role he’s ever auditioned for…. So damn powerful that nothing anyone say could hurt his reputation, not even his supposedly old boarding school roommate who claimed to have had sex with Henry on multiple occasions. He was like a man of steel to Alex… but then again, that was the person Alex saw on TV. He didn’t know Henry personally and even though Bea swore that he was as goofy and as painfully normal as any other English man, Alex couldn’t believe it until he saw it himself.
This obsession—for lack of a better word— Alex had with Henry was an anomaly in his well put together life, and sometimes thinking about it for longer than a few seconds was something Alex wasn’t strong enough to do. So, he’d shrug it off and bury those thoughts in the piled up grave in the back of his mind, along with everything else he didn’t ever want to think about… like Liam, like his parent’s divorce, his mother walking out on him and June, the fact that she came back with another man and a kid two years later, his father’s downward spiral into becoming a full fledged alcoholic ten years back… all of it, he kept them locked up with chains and barbwire and explosives that fatally wounded the person trying to dig them up.
“I don’t blame him.” Alex said as he looked around. “this is a damn dive bar. I’ve seen better in the middle of god-knows-where Colorado.”
Nora rolled her eyes and crossed her arms. “if you didn’t want to be here, why did you come?”
“Because…” I heard Henry was coming. He thought but for obvious reasons couldn’t say it out loud. “…I missed you guys. Work’s been kicking my ass and I needed a break.” He said with a smile and watched Nora ease into a soft grin.
“You’re a model, Alex… not a very tough job.” Bea raised a brow. She obviously meant it lightly. She had done her fair share of modelling and knew better than anyone what a nightmare it could be. It definitely was a nightmare for Alex on some days, but he mostly loved every single bit of it.
“And when I say your performance last night was all over the place, then I’m the bad guy.” Alex said lightly and got a smack against the head from Nora.
“Don’t say that!” she stifled a laugh.
“Oh wow, right where it hurts, Alex. You really don’t leave any prisoners behind, do you?” Bea shook her head, and joined the two in laughter.
June soon arrived, five minutes later as promised. She wore a black off shoulder dress and a pair of striking red heels. Her hair was newly highlighted a soft honey blonde that made her tan skin pop. She sat across from Alex and urged them to start ordering because she couldn’t wait for ‘prince Henry’ to decide to show up.
Henry came in 20 minutes later, standing out like a sore thumb in his black Givenchy suit in a bar of washed out jeans and flannel wearing people. In other words, he looked like a God amongst men.
Alex’s heart stopped. He wasn’t sure if he needed it to work again when Henry was everything he ever needed. The man was graceful in ways Alex didn’t know how to describe. He sauntered over to their booth and stood before them, his eyes falling on Alex first.
“I’ve seen you before.” Henry said, a ghost of a smile forming on his face. “The nude pumpkin guy.” He added and smirked. Alex laughed, slightly bashful.
“I’m Henry, its a pleasure to finally meet you both.” He extended his hand towards Alex to give him a firm shake, and then turned his gaze towards June, took her hand and pressed his lips to her knuckles. She blushed. Alex’s heart dropped to his stomach, and everyone else was unfazed.
“Glad you could join us. I was starting to think you didn’t actually exist.” June giggled as she took her hand back. She silently contemplated never washing it again.
She was going to offer him a seat beside her but Alex made sure to beat her to it. He shoved Nora deeper into the booth and made space for him. Henry gladly accepted the offer and sat down. He smelled amazing, so much so that Alex wanted to bury his face in that tiny little space between Henry’s jaw and his perfectly pressed collar.
“I’ve been meaning to meet you two,” he looked between both June and Alex, “But I’ve been so busy the last couple of months, I couldn’t really take a break.”
“And the trauma on top of that, right? Didn’t you, like, almost drop from a 30 ft. building during filming?” Alex wasn’t sure why he said those words because it made him sound like a fangirl with a secret twitter account used to keep tabs on everything Henry Fox related… which he technically was, but that’s beside the point.
“And where did you hear that?” Bea laughed and June gave him a look that said ‘I know what you are, little brother.’
“I bet if you check his search history, Henry’s name will be the first to pop up.” Nora added and they all laughed.
“Alright, that’s enough, not everyone’s obsessed with me.” Henry said and then looked to Alex, surprised that a man like him would be interested in his boring life.
“I swear, I nearly pissed myself. It’s a good thing I had a harness.” He said and thought back to the incident for a second.
“How’d you even…”
“…tripped over my own two feet.” Henry answered, knowing what Alex was in the midst of asking.
“and here I was thinking you were perfect.” Alex joked, but he meant it deep down. He was glad to find out that Henry was as normal as an incredibly famous and wealthy actor could be, and not Godlike at all, though that perfectly symmetrical face could beg to differ.
“I mean, he still is.” June said, offering Henry a sweet smile.
Was she into him or did she want to flirt with him just to get on Alex’s nerves? Did she try to push him in some way because she knew how competitive he was? Alex didn’t know but he suspected it was the latter. Unfortunately for him, June was the only other person in the world that knew he had a little complicated crush on Henry. He used to collect magazine posters of Henry and shove them somewhere in his room he was sure no one would find but June did, unintentionally, when she was looking for her Airpods she was sure Alex misplaced. She didn’t bring it up to him right away, but waited a few weeks instead, carefully calculating what the outcome might be. He was angry, ashamed even, but days after not talking to her, he came around.
“I beg to differ.” Henry chuckled, and cleared his throat. He never did like those sort of compliments from women. It made him feel like he was stripped naked in front of millions of people. But of course he couldn’t tell her that, he couldn’t even say it to his therapist. Alex interjected and changed the subject by asking how long he’s planning to stay in LA. It was like he could see Henry’s discomfort visibility draped over him like a thick blanket.
“Didn’t you hear?” Bea said, two seats over, her arm thrown over Nora’s shoulder. “He’s moving to LA.” She added and Alex swore he heard wedding bells ring somewhere in the back of his head.
“Oh? Well, here’s to not falling off a 30 ft. building, and moving to Los fucking Angeles.” Alex handed him a shot glass, took one of his own and downed it. The liquor burned as it slithered down his throat. He wouldn’t ever admit it but he loved that feeling.
Henry caught up with the rest of the group and he did so by taking more tequila shots than he could count. By the time his cheeks finally gained a rosy glow, he slowed down and focused his energy on chatting up Alex. Let’s just say he was more than a little intrigued by the man. He found him so beautiful, not only for the way he looked but for how he spoke and carried himself. A damn angel, he thought at some point, staring at those long lashes as Alex spoke about his trip to Botswana where he visited the Karowe diamond mine and got to learn about how the diamonds mined and sold supported the entire country, and had put a large number of locals through college all while providing them with employment. He pointed towards June’s neck in the midst of that, gleaming with pride as the little diamond he carved out for her sparkled under the warm light.
Henry was surprised, mostly in awe that Alex, the guy who was almost always naked in his photoshoots and never took anything seriously, was such an interesting, caring and down to earth man.
They carried on talking, going from one topic to another before Henry asked Alex where he was from.
“Texas, huh?” He gave Alex a once over like he was looking for hay in his hair and a gun tucked under his belt.
“Born and bred.” Alex slurred. He was really starting to feel like his sober-self was too far out reach for him to hold onto. He briefly thought of his father’s drinking habits, how Oscar would disappear from work in the middle of the day and then call Alex at wee hours of the night stuck in the middle of nowhere. A part of him hated Oscar for that, for losing himself at the bottom of a bottle when he should’ve been focusing on his children who lost their mother…not to death, but because she didn’t care about them enough to stay.
Alex didn’t want to become his father, he didn’t want to become either of his parents and yet he felt as though walking their paths was something set in stone for him.
It brought a deep despair over him, and his face contorted with pain in the middle of his friends laughter and chatter. He turned to Henry, because he couldn’t put this weight on either June or Nora. Henry was a safe option, he wouldn’t know what was going through Alex’s mind. “I need some air. Do you wanna join me?”
Henry gave him a questioning look but he lost it as soon as Alex’s eyes fluttered and his lashes brushed against his cheeks, one of them losing their grip and landing on the tip of his nose. “Yeah…” Henry quietly said as he lifted his hand, leaned into Alex and picked up the single lash with the tip of his forefinger.
“Uhm…?” Alex tried questioning but Henry cut him off with a toothy grin and said “Make a wish.”
Alex broke into laughter and when he thought Henry would too and pull his hand away, he was offered a pout instead. Neither of the girls looked at them, they were talking about going to Venice in the spring, and discussing things Alex wished he hadn’t heard.
“Okay,” He said, cupped Henry’s hand with his own and blew on the lash until it disappeared somewhere overhead. He made a wish, but he definitely wasn’t going to share it with Henry… not yet at least.
They stepped outside, leaving the laughter, chatter and music behind. There was a chill in the air, indicating autumn’s arrival, and Alex was pissed that he left his jacket inside. He didn’t say anything though as he rounded the building with Henry to lean back against a cold wall. They both looked up at the sky, staring… or in Alex’s case, trying to count each and every star his eyes fell on. An impossible task, but it didn’t stop him from at least trying.
“Sometimes when things got too overwhelming at home, my mother used to sit outside and count the stars for hours.” He said before he could stop himself. One thing he hated about being drunk was how easily he opened up about his life to even the most random of people.
Henry raised a curious brow. “Is that what you’re doing?” he quietly asked, turning to lean on his side so he could face Alex. “Are you feeling overwhelmed?”
“Kind of.” Alex turned his focus on Henry, his features highlighted by the soft moonlight. He was happy that he didn’t get a follow up question.
He stared at Henry’s eyes, trying to figure out what colour they were. They looked green on magazine covers, hazel on TV but in person— it was like staring into a kaleidoscope. He shifted his gaze towards Henry’s lips, they were pink and full and looked incredibly soft.
Alex never imagined himself in a situation where he would ever kiss The Henry Fox, but there he was, inches away from him with his heart, for some reason, beating out of his chest.
How crazy it was, that he was 28 years old and had a crush on a man he didn’t even know. How crazy it was, that the man leaned into him and put their lips together.
Henry knew he shouldn’t have, he knew that giving in to his sexual desires was dangerous in a way that could kill his career in a blink of an eye, but he didn’t care. He was too drunk to, too damn tired to care about keeping his real self hidden. He knew he couldn’t come out, couldn’t live as an openly gay man, or fall in love, but what he could do was make-out with a troubled closet case much like himself.
His mouth was warm and his lips soft against Alex’s. The kiss didn’t last long but for those few seconds it did, it felt like they were the only two people in the world, like everything and everyone else melted away leaving only that short-lived beautiful moment behind.
Henry was the one to pull back. He realised that he didn’t ask Alex if he could kiss him. He liked asking, yes because of consent but mostly because he loved hearing the desperate “yes” in the other man’s voice. He couldn’t lie and say that it didn’t completely turn him on.
“I didn’t ask if I could kiss you...” he said softly, pushing himself off the wall and then standing in front of Alex.
Alex was tall and built like a gladiator but in that moment, he seemed small and precious. Henry closed the gap between them and placed both hands on either side of Alex’s face, his palms tickled by the scruff. “May I kiss you?”
As if any other parallel universe existed in which Alex could ever say no. He eagerly leaned forward.
“Alex,” surprisingly, Henry pulled away and Alex blinked in confusion. “I need to hear you say it.” He explained, quietly, caressing Alex’s cheek with the tip of his thumb.
Alex smiled and relaxed against the wall, his hips gently pinned down by Henry’s weight. “Yes, Henry, I want you to kiss me.”