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grow legs and run for your life

Summary:

“I was busy having a life, unlike some people,” Izuku said.

“I have a life, I just manage my time well, unlike some people," Katsuki replied.

“Oh, low blow.”

Notes:

hey losers im BAAACK <3

THIS ONE MARKS 20 WORKS IN THE SERIES I LOVE YALL SERIOUSLY THANK YOU FOR LOVING THIS SERIES AS MUCH AS I DO!!!!!!

let me know what you think of this one!!!!1

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

“Is your life’s purpose stressing me the fuck out?” Katsuki asked. Izuku was in front of him, hopping around in one sock while trying to tug the other one on. He slipped, grabbing onto the ledge of the counter to avoid smashing his face against it. Katsuki inhaled deeply, trying to remain calm. 

 

They had to be out the door in about ten minutes to go over to Shoto’s for a reunion. Katsuki had been ready for a while, getting dressed in advance so he wouldn’t have to worry about rushing. Izuku, on the other hand, waited until the very last minute to start pulling himself together. 

 

“I’m sorry! I’m going as fast as I can!” Izuku exclaimed, finally pulling his sock over his ankle and up his calf underneath the bottom of his gray sweatpants. It was a casual event, just a handful of them hanging out at Todoroki’s place, probably with alcohol, weed, and stupid decisions. He remembered their last reunion well, mostly because he had to carry Izuku home and strip him, tucking him into bed before even changing out of his own dirty clothes. He’d tried not to stare too hard. 

 

“We have to leave in five minutes, dumbass,” Katsuki grumbled. He scanned Izuku, assessing the situation at hand. He now had two socks on, but was still stumbling around trying to find a hoodie and hopefully a better sense of time management. 

 

“Found one!” Izuku shouted from his bedroom, rushing out in a purple hoodie that complimented his green hair nicely. Katsuki couldn’t help but admire his ability to put together a decent outfit, even in a time crunch. He usually just throws on the first thing he can find, never bothering to even glance in the mirror after getting dressed. As long as it’s comfortable, it’s good enough for him. He’s always valued comfort over fashion. Looking good has never been a priority, but feeling good is. 

 

“Took you long enough,” Katsuki said, grabbing the bag they’d thrown together haphazardly. It was a mix of vodka and a few late birthday presents for Kirishima, who was also going to be there. They’d both chipped in on a joint gift, because that meant only one of them had to do the actual shopping and the other could just write their name on the card. So Izuku picked out the gift, and Katsuki got to flex his handwriting on yet another birthday card. That’s the only downside to having a big group of friends (acquaintances). 

 

“I was busy having a life, unlike some people,” Izuku said. 

 

“I have a life, I just manage my time well, unlike some people.” 

 

“Oh, low blow.”

 

“Says you, hypocrite.” Izuku chuckled, shaking his head and grabbing his coat, slipping it on over his hoodie. Katsuki followed suit, grabbing the keys to the apartment and trailing behind Izuku out the door. He put the key in the lock, twisting it-

 

“Fuck, I forgot my phone,” Izuku said. Katsuki clenched his jaw, trying not to start screaming. He removed the key from the keyhole, reopening the door. Izuku ran inside, and Katsuki could hear him throwing things around, searching for his lost phone. He sighed, reaching into his pocket for his own device. He pulled it out, and he was holding…

 

Izuku Midoriya’s fucking phone.

 

He checked his other pocket and found his own phone, so now he was standing outside the door awkwardly holding two phones in one hand and a key in the other. He checked the time. They were supposed to leave two minutes ago to help Shoto set up. Katsuki contemplated yelling into the apartment, letting Izuku know about his newly recovered phone, but he paused. It would be fun to see him suffer. 

 

“Kacchan, can you help me look? I swear to god, it disappeared into thin air,” Izuku shouted. Katsuki had a hard time containing his laughter. He put both phones away and pinched himself to keep his emotions at bay. 

 

“How’d you lose it that fucking badly?” Katsuki replied, re-entering the apartment to “look” for Izuku’s phone. 

 

“I don’t know! I had it right before I put my socks on, and now it’s just gone!”

 

“Maybe it grew legs and ran away.”

 

“I wish that was the case,” Izuku muttered. They both scoured the kitchen, Izuku’s bedroom, and the bathroom. It took everything in him to not burst out laughing whenever Izuku glanced his way. He could feel the weight of both phones in his pocket. 

 

“I’m gonna piss real quick,” Katsuki said, leaving Izuku alone in the bedroom. He stopped at the kitchen counter, taking Izuku’s phone out and leaving it in broad daylight. He practically skipped to his bathroom, standing behind the door for a minute or two before flushing the toilet. He never really needed to go. When he started running the water to “wash his hands”, he heard a frustrated scream from the kitchen. 

 

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Izuku screeched. Katsuki couldn’t hold it in any longer, starting to double over with laughter. He was laughing so hard it hurt his stomach, and he was clutching the side of the sink like a lifeline so he wouldn’t topple over. 

 

Izuku busted through his bathroom door without knocking. 

 

“What the fuck! What if I was naked?” Katsuki asked, trying to breathe through his amusement. He wasn’t naked, but it would’ve been even funnier if he was. 

 

“Did you have this the whole fucking time?” Izuku asked. 

 

“No.”

 

“You’re a liar.”

 

“Would I ever steer you wrong, Izu?”

 

“Yes, absolutely.” Katsuki put his hand over his mouth, muffling his continued laughter. 

 

“Listen, we need to get going-”

 

“Oh, hell no,” Izuku said, and then his hand disappeared into Katsuki’s pocket. Katsuki periodically blacked out, because when he reoriented himself, Izuku was running off with both of their phones in hand, leaving Katsuki flustered and phoneless. 

 

“Come on! We’re already late!” Katsuki yelled, chasing after him. Izuku tried to close his bedroom door on Katsuki’s face to no avail. He was able to throw his body through the crack in the door, body slamming Izuku onto the bed. 

 

“No, go away!” Izuku hollered, struggling to get out from underneath him. Katsuki kept scrambling for his phone, finally grabbing it only for it to be pulled away the next second. 

 

“Give me my phone,” Katsuki growled. That made Izuku halt for a moment, leaving Katsuki with an opening. He snatched his phone away, rolling off of Izuku and collapsing on the bed beside him. They were both struggling to catch their breath. 

 

“So, are you ready to go?” Izuku asked. Katsuki slapped his arm lightly with no real conviction. 

 

“I’ve been ready, but you decided to lose your fucking phone.” 

 

“You literally stole it!”

 

“You're delusional.” 

Notes:

i wish izuku just shoved his hand in his pants and

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