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Alana looked on in shock, crying silently, as she took in the sight before her. Her beloved fiancé, Margot, was surrounded by first aid supplies and bloody knives; her thighs and left arm dripping blood uncontrollably.
Margot looked at Alana, feeling dread envelope her chest. She knew it was over between them now. Her secret was out, and that meant she was, too. Alana would never love her again. She would be alone, just like she had been when Mason was still alive.
Margot spoke to Alana, “I’ll just leave now. I’ll go and I won’t bother you anymore, but I want you to know that I still love you, even if you don’t love me.” She stood to go, but Alana almost ran over to her, pushing her back down onto the bed gently. “No, honey, sweetheart. You aren’t going anywhere, Margot.”
Seeing Margot’s confused and fearful expression, Alana spoke again kneeling down to eye level, “Oh, Margot. Did you think I would hate you for this? Did you honestly think I would stop loving you if I found out?
Margot started to cry and nodded franticly, which only made Alana’s tears worse, “Y-you’re s-s-supposed to y-yell at me and n-never w-want-t to s-see me ag-again… Why are you being so nice?”
Alana stroked Margot’s cheek with her thumb, “I’m not going to do any of those things, Margot. I love you. Yes, seeing you like this makes me upset, but you’re important to me.” Margot just cried harder at the declaration of love, feeling at once ashamed and relieved.
Alana spoke, her throat feeling constricted, “How long has this been going on, sweetie?” Margot replied, “About six weeks. Before that, I hadn’t hurt myself since I had met you, but I used to.”
Alana felt her heart break at this statement. She had no idea that her Margot was in so much pain. She had been completely unaware that Margot had been doing this to herself for over a month, while she stayed ignorant. She felt like the worst fiancé in the world. But it wasn’t about her now. She had to help Margot.
She asked, “Margot, can I see the…” She cleared her throat, “the cuts?” Margot shook her head vehemently, signalling her distress. Alana looked at her bloody thighs and arm, “Honey, there’s a lot of blood here. I need to check to see how deep they are. Please, for my peace of mind?” Margot considered for a few seconds, and then nodded her consent slowly.
Alana picked up some tissues and started dabbing and wiping softly at the slowly congealing fluid. As soon as she was done, almost every wound started bleeding again before she could have a good chance to inspect them. This worried Alana greatly. “Margot, your wounds are very deep. I think you might need to go to a hospital.”
“No.” Margot replied with panic, reacting as if she had been burned. “There’s no need to go anywhere. I appreciate your concern but I can handle this myself.” The brusqueness in her reply made Alana angry. Before she knew what she was doing, she yelled, “Don’t you see what’s happening, Margot?!”
Margot flinched and started getting up to leave, but Alana had stood up too, eyes wide, “Oh god, Margot. I’m so sorry! I didn’t… I-I didn’t mean to yell at you.” Margot spoke quietly, crying again “Then why did you? You promised you wouldn’t!” Alana pleaded, “Please, Margot, don’t leave. You need medical attention.” At Margot’s defiant expression, she added, “Alright, alright, we don’t have to go to the hospital, but I need to take care of you right now, before you lose any more blood!”
Margot sat down in defeat, wavering heavily, confirming Alana’s suspicion that her blood loss was reaching dangerous levels. Alana got to work, bandaging Margot’s wounds as tightly as she could without hurting Margot. Margot did wince every now and again, and her eyes looked extremely unfocused by the time Alana was finished.
Alana wiped away the remaining residue, depositing the bloody tissues in the bin. She looked at Margot with a soft smile, “All better now?” Margot nodded silently, looking like she wanted to be anywhere else. Alana sighed softly, “Margot, you don’t need to shut me out from this anymore. Please let me help you. I know you feel bad, but you shouldn’t. I’m here to help you and love you. You don’t need to be ashamed.”
Margot stood up slowly, with Alana supporting her. She took a few steps, limping and wincing in pain. Alana looked on worriedly, but Margot told her, “This is normal for me, Alana. It’s supposed to hurt. I need it to hurt.”
Alana looked at her sympathy, “I understand how you feel, Margot. I know much about self-injury; how it is often like a part of someone who engages in it. I just never suspected it was part of you.” Margot smiled grimly, “Well, it is. Better get used to it.” Alana reassured her, “We will work through this together, darling. I promise you I will be with you every step of the way. You just need to trust me, even if you can’t trust yourself.”
Margot reached down to her knives, noticing Alana start in response, “Don’t worry, Alana. I’ve hurt myself enough today. I just want to put them away.” With that statement, she looked pointedly at Alana, “Could you please leave for a moment?”
Against her better judgement, Alana left the room. A few minutes later, after washing the two bloody knives and putting them with the rest of her supplies in her secret drawer, Margot opened the door and left the room as well.
Alana caught her in time, before she fell to the floor, greatly weakened by blood loss. Supporting her to the couch, Alana draped a blanket over Margot before going to the kitchen to help replenish her with food and water.
Alana was not about to let Margot suffer even more than she already had. She would take care of her queen, no matter what.
Two hours later, the Verger-Bloom fiancé stretched her legs, muscles aching, and slowly got up from her resting position. She needed to get out of the mansion and think. The day’s stressful events had caught her off guard and she needed to process what had happened.
Of course, she had a good cry when her eventual spouse wasn’t around to hear her, but she was still moving through her grief and shock. She moved quietly out the door, limping slightly, with her keys in hand, certain that her love was asleep. Getting into her car, she started the engine and drove down the dirt road, not looking back.
No, she wasn’t running away. Not for good, anyway. She needed time away from her darling soon-to-be-wife; as much as she loved her, she still had herself to take care of. If she couldn’t take care of herself, she couldn’t very well take care of her stressed bride-to-be, could she? As she herself got more stressed with every thought of her beloved and how she must be feeling about the situation, the car increased in speed.
She swerved around another speeding car, swearing slightly as she did so. Her beloved would be shocked to hear such words from her. Neither of them had ever been partial to road rage, but it seemed that circumstances had changed.
As she checked her mirror to watch the car leave, the future Verger-Bloom didn’t see the other car coming out of nowhere, almost matching her own accelerated speed. The two cars collided with a force strong enough to smash the entire front section of each car.
She was hit by shrapnel, shattered glass and felt her body pushed backwards with a sharp pain in her stomach. She looked down, coughing from the smoke and blood coming out of her mouth. Part of her sighed in dismay. She’d seen enough blood today; she didn’t need more! The other part of her was panicked.
She’d been in a car crash! Well, that much was obvious, she chided her overdramatic brain, but now was definitely not the time for theatrics. She tried to wriggle out of the smashed car, until she looked down and saw a jagged piece of metal protruding from her abdomen. She gasped in realisation and then started screaming for help.
Eventually, she could hear sirens in the distance, as her voice faded with strain. Darkness was clouding her vision, as she struggled against impossible bonds to release herself from what had now become a literal death trap. She wasn’t in much pain, considering her dire situation, but she knew that it would come, and soon. She prayed to be unconscious by the time it happened, and, hopefully, in a hospital.
She heard frantic voices near the car and hoped that they were paramedics and not people stopping to gawk or take pictures on their phones. She tried yelling for help, but found that there was too much blood in her airways to make any sound except choking noises.
As the darkness fully enveloped her, she felt the car begin to move, as the desperate efforts to save her began…
