Chapter Text
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Slow and long, the rhythm flows. The thrusts when they come, come hard and penetrate deep every time. A hand reaches up to brace against the headboard and the fingers of the other hand curl into the sheets beneath her.
Today had been a very long day and the desire to lose herself in the pleasures of being desired proves exactly what she needed. Fucking, dirty and without rhyme or reason. There's no thought beyond chasing down the impending release and there's not meant to be. Only feelings can and will exist tonight. Simple sex. Nothing more, nothing less.
Except, as it turns out though, she does indeed need more. Sure, everything feels good but there's still room for improvement. The flames are growing with intensity the more their bodies move together but the heat still feels so very far away. Make no mistake, the heat can be felt but there's still distance between experiencing the delicious burning explosion she chases, so to speak. She needs more and being who she is, Athena isn't afraid to voice exactly what she wants and needs most in this moment.
"I need more..."
"I can give you more."
To her ears the voice above sounds different but no matter, the words fade away into nothing anyway as her mind drifts to focus upon the sensations flooding through her.
The room smells of sex and the air fills with whimpers, moans and groans, the sound of flesh slapping together as bodies more.
As he hitches her leg higher, Athena's eyes close and Bobby encompasses her every sense, her breath catches around a whimper and all she can focus upon is the handsome Captain that fills her heart, her mind, her nights and her days. He's everything and everything about him serves to make the moment hotter. The warmth in his soft brown eyes, his lovely smile, the way his arm wraps around her in a side hug hello, how a few words shared during a scene can brighten up an otherwise dreary day. Sometimes, the simplest of things mean the most.
"Yes, that's it, that's better... I'm- I'm close."
A grunt is the only reply but it makes no difference, so lost inside her own head and pleasure to even notice.
The intensity of the heat coursing through her begins to further grow and soon, even with her eyes closed, the face she sees nearly everyday, Bobby's face, imprints upon her mind's eye to become all she's able to see.
God, those eyes and that damn smile of his. Always her undoing.
The peak swiftly approaches and soon enough, she falls over the edge as waves of pleasure rush through her.
"Oh god yes... Bobby, oh Bobby!!"
Almost immediately, it jolts her somewhat and makes her understandably wince, the sudden halt of movement which quickly follows her hoarse screams. The cease of all action came as sudden as the orgasm and despite said orgasm clouding her every sense, reality quickly crashes damn around her, through the pleasure to the forefront of reality. Blinking open her eyes slowly, gazes immediately lock with the man above and Athena's quick to realise her mistake.
A ghastly mistake.
This wasn't Bobby above her, but Aaron.
Oh god, no.
Dammit.
This is bad. Another wince can barely be kept under wraps. How could she have been so careless as to forget where she was and with whom she's with. Goddamn it.
"What the fuck--"
"Aaron, listen..."
"What did you just say?" He kneels between her legs, staring back in disbelief. "Who the hell is Bobby?" Aaron asks loudly, too loud actually as he moves away hastily from the cradle of her thighs, where anger clouds his expression as he comes to stand at the foot of the bed. His eyes bore into her, clearly unimpressed. Very, very unimpressed. "Well, who is he?!"
Ignoring his anger and wrapping the sheets around her, Athena brushes a hand wearily across her face. How on earth could she let this happen?
"Athena! Answer me!"
The harshness surrounding her name claws back her attention. Her eyes narrow. "Don't you dare use that tone with me, you understand?" She may have made a mistake but never does it give anyone the right to talk to her that way. Even if she's in the wrong and most definitely, she's very much in the wrong. Still doesn't give anyone the right to speak to her like that.
Aaron throws up his hands in exasperation. "I think I have the right to be angry, considering you just screamed another man's name while we were having sex. Twice." No man would be happy about such a thing and Aaron is no different. "What the hell."
Withholding the urge to roll her eyes, Athena slides out of the bed to begin collecting her clothes. The night is, obviously, now over. Among other things. This had gone on for too long anyway. What began as a much needed rebound to boost her confidence following her decision to file for divorce had now served it's purpose. Aaron had served his purpose, to a degree. Which maybe seems harsh but nonetheless is the truth. There can be no denying though that throughout the times where they'd had sex, tonight no different, she'd needed a little something more to help her along and the handsome Captain who haunts her days and nights, many a time helped her along nicely. Which is why this situation even now exists. "Which is all we were doing, having fun. I told you I wasn't looking for anything serious, I just wanted some fun. Sex, that's it."
"Then maybe this Bobby should have been the one to give it to you, sounds to me like that's exactly what you want anyway."
Keeping her back to him as she finishes up getting redressed, Athena doesn't dignify his crude words with a response.
"Aren't you going to say anything? Are you not even going to apologise to me? Really Athena?! I thought you were a better woman than that but maybe I was wrong."
Now once again dressed, Athena spins around, fire in her eyes. "What do you want me to say?!"
"An apology would be nice. It'd make for a good start."
"Fine, if an apology is what you want, then here you go. I'm sorry you're upset because yes, I have been thinking about another man whilst we've been having sex--" Athena throws hands up in defeat when he interrupts, because he wanted an explanation but won't allow her opportunity to actually offer one.
"What?" The words slowly register for him. Suddenly, for him, this had just gotten a whole lot worse. "Hold on, have you done this before when we were together? Is that it?" Aaron asks incredulously, hands on his hips as he glares at her. "Are you telling me this isn't the first time?" His anger only seems to increase now he holds the knowledge his sexual prowess alone isn't quite enough to fulfil her needs. "You've been thinking about this guy everytime we've had sex! What the hell--"
The last part was voiced more as a statement than a question, so he'd already answered for himself but still, Aaron expects a response from her nonetheless. She could lie but she won't because what's the point? The truth rests between them anyway, Bobby's name a very heavy weight. They hadn't had sex more than a handful of times at this point but the point still remains true and she goes on to offer nothing but the truth. "No, this isn't the first time and the only reason you know now, is because I was so lost in thinking about him, I forgot to keep my mouth shut."
The reaffirmation of the truth settles like stone between them. For Aaron, the admission collides harshly with his ego, bruising it badly. For Athena, the admission feels somewhat freeing. For the first time, she's partially admitted outloud to someone else the secret she's guarded so closely for so long.
No one knows, not even Henrietta but now someone does. Not exactly a person she wanted to know the truth but hey, here they are. In a very strange way, now more than ever before, the feelings in her heart suddenly feel so much more intense, because to an extent the feelings have been acknowledged outside of her own private thoughts for the very first time. Suddenly everything feels much more real.
The silence stretches between them.
"Who is he?"
Aaron breaks the silence by asking the question quietly and Athena stares back blankly, concealing her emotions.
Who he is, is simply a wonderful man who's been through some of life's hardest and harshest experiences and though not without a hard and constant daily fight, has come out the other side a stronger man because of everything he's had to and continues to endure. Even though he'd argue different, Bobby would be the first to deny his own strength, his own kindness and even the goodness within his heart. Athena clearly sees Bobby for who he really is, she sees his flaws and acknowledges his faults but nonetheless, her heart has fallen in love with him regardless. He may not be perfect but to her, he is. "It doesn't matter who is he."
"To me, maybe you right." Aaron shrugs nonchalantly. "Maybe it doesn't matter but I imagine it would to your husband."
Athena's eyes narrow, surprised by the direction this conversations suddenly going. Now Michael's being dragged into this mess, a mess which doesn't concern him. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?"
Aaron shrugs, before bending down to pick up his jeans. "By your own admission this isn't the first time you've intimately thought about this guy, makes me wonder how long this has been going on."
"Aaron," Athena warns him with just his name but he ignores the warning.
"I mean, if this has been going on before we even started having fun, maybe something happened when you were married--"
"Now you wait a damn minute, don't you dare stand there and accuse me of adultery. Nothing and I mean nothing has ever happened between me and Bobby. Throughout my entire marriage I have remained faithful--"
"Oh really?" Aaron mocks her, whilst doing up his belt. "Are you sure about that?"
Athena stares back at him, steadfast in her words. "Yes, I'm sure. What I'm unsure of though is why I'm even explaining myself to you."
He stares at her, as though she's mad. "You don't think I deserve an explanation after what just happened? Any guy would be pissed, Athena!"
She shakes her head.
"What? You don't think I have the right?"
"I never said that but people fantasise everyday--"
"Do you think your husband would agree?"
"Well considering my husband likes men, he probably would." She can't help but quip because it's most definitely the truth.
"I concede your point but come on, Athena--" Aaron says, "you think 'people fantasise everyday' gives you a pass to scream another man's name?"
"Of course not." Athena sighs, feeling like they're going round in circles. "I've apologised, I don't know what more you want from me."
He stares at her, shocked by her lack of response or emotion or even reason. He honestly thought he'd get more from her than this. He thought he meant more to her than this yet how wrong that actually proves to be. "Who is he?" Aaron asks again.
"I already told you, who he is doesn't concern you."
Clear to Aaron now is the fact Athena will never reveal to him exactly who this man is. "Forget who he is then. Let me ask you this instead, what is he to you?"
Her heart thuds nervously in her chest. This is the first time someone has directly questioned her feelings for the handsome Minnesotta boy scout. Athena looks at Aaron. "What are you talking about?"
"Come on Athena, is this guy only your fantasy to help to get you off?" Aaron questions her crudely, before he twists the knife and aims for her emotions. "Or is this much more serious and you're actually in love with him?"
The words knock the wind from her sails. Athena can't quite bring herself to say anything, so she doesn't. Revealing such a truth doesn't belong in this moment and it certainly doesn't belong to Aaron. The only person who should hear such words is the man they are intended for. Which is something Athena can never see happening.
He watches the emotions flicker across her beautiful face and inside, he feels his on heart ache in response. "You do. You try to hide the truth but now I can see-- You love him." He'd known going into this, what was between them was never going to be anything serious but he'd hoped to change her mind. Foolishly, he'd hoped once Athena got to know him, she'd recognise how good they could be together and eventually, she'd want more. Unfortunately, her mind and her heart had been focused elsewhere the entire time. "I think you not only lied to me but more importantly, I think you lied to yourself. You may have remained faithful to your husband in the physical sense, but emotionally, that's another story." Aaron tells her plainly. His bruised ego making him take aim and hurt her in a way he can see definitely will. "Tell me I'm wrong."
The words hurt so much because despite everything, there's truth to them. While she may have remained faithful to Michael and their vows in the physical sense, emotionally; she'd been unfaithful, for a very long time. "I don't owe you anything beyond the apology I already gave and I certainly don't have to tell you a damn thing apart from this--" She motions between them-- "this is over."
"Agreed." Aaron scowls, watching her march toward the door. "Oh and Athena, word of advice, next time you're looking for someone to fuck, fuck the guy you actually want. Don't use someone else, I didn't deserve this." Aaron says harshly. "Now get out."
"With pleasure." With that parting shot fired, Athena walks away.
Not for one moment can she honestly believe what on earth had just taken place. How could she have been so stupid? Lost inside her own head, the walls had been allowed to fall and as the result, Bobby's name had fallen from her goddamn lips.
She'd allowed her heart to become unguarded and as a result, her closely guarded secret is no longer closely guarded at all. For the first time, it's out there in the open.
Which feels both terrifying and exhilarating in the same breath.
Leaning back against her car, the darkness which wraps itself around the night suddenly seems very fitting, for it matches her mood perfectly. Taking a deep breath, Athena yanks open the driver's side door to her car before getting inside. As she starts the engine, there's only one common theme present in her mind.
How on earth could she have been so stupid? How could she allow her secret to slip away from her like that? This entire situation is ridiculous and something more fitting for a soap opera rather than her life.
As Athena drives home, she asks herself the question, can her life really get much worse?
A guy husband and a failed marriage. A divorce on the horizon and her mother's unwavering disappointment. And now there's this mess to contend with.
Life can only get better but sometimes it has to get even worse first.
Unfortunately for her, that's exactly what awaits ahead.
Life can and will get worse.
Which she'll soon find out.
But first, she has to go home. To a home which she still, temporarily, shares with her husband.
Oh god, her life really is a mess.
Maybe, God forbid, her mother was actually right all along and she is a disaster.
Divorcing one man, sleeping with another whilst fantasising about another man whom she's fallen in love with.
What a mess indeed.
Tbc...
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