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silly lego ninjas

Summary:

ninjago epic texting fic! :) (sort of)

Notes:

i desperately want ps5. i want spiderman 2...CRIEISIISISISISI

Chapter 1: a birthday party

Chapter Text

RGB sibs

@laloyd - lloyd 'smith' garmadon

@adorenyaa - nya smith

@kaiyah - kai smith

 

@laloyd

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KAI🥰🥰🥰😭😭😭🤪🤪😍😍😍🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶

@laloyd

WE DIDNT PLAN U A SURPRISE BUT WE BOUGHT U SUMN

 

@adorenyaa

WAYT ITS KAI'S BIRTHDAY?

@adorenyaa

jk. i bought u 3 chees pizzas with double cheese☺️

 

@kaiyah

HSBDHDHSJ THANK U MY ADORABLE CUTE LITTLE BABY SIBLINGS

@kaiyah

STILL WAITING FROM MOM N DAD. 🙄

 

@adorenyaa

fuck mom n dad, theyre always 'busy' 😠😠😠

 

@laloyd

THEYRE STILL OUR PARENTS

 

@kaiyah

daddy garmadon is better😍😍😍

@kaiyah

I DIDN'T MEANT TO MAKE IT THAT WEird

@kaiyah

SORRY LLOYD

 

@laloyd

i gagged and giggled at that

@laloyd

it's ok kai. or should i say, BIRTHDAY BOY? 🥳

 

@adorenyaa

we should throw a party dude😊😊

 

@kaiyah

at our apartment? OOKAYYY😏

@kaiyah

INFORM THE OTHERS!!

 

@adorenyaa

OK BDAY BRO

 

silly vigilantes

@laloyd - lloyd

@adorenyaa - nya

@kaiyah - kai

@colesstones - cole brookstone

@zanejulin - zane julien

@jayzaps - jay gordon walker

@pixxl - pixal borg

@skylore - skylor chen

 

@adorenyaa

HEY TWEAKS!!!!!1!1!1! our place at 8pm 4 kais bday party

@adorenyaa

NO BUZZKILLERS😊

 

@pixxl

OKOKOKOKOK skylor pick me up🥺🥺

 

@skylore

dontchu have a bf🥺🥺

 

@zanejulin

no

 

@kaiyah

HI ZANEEE, are u comeing

@kaiyah

i can pick u up

 

@zanejulin

ok. pick me up at 5

 

@kaiyah

okeyeyeyey

 

@laloyd

uhm. ok. how bout the othrs

 

@colesstones

HAPPY BDAY KAI FUCKING SMITH

 

@kaiyah

thank u cole thank u

 

@colesstones

im coming late

@colesstones

have sumn 2do

 

@adorenyaa

OHH HMM COLE BROOKSTONE IS BUSY HUHHH?

 

@laloyd

100% believing it🥺

 

@kaiyah

ok. jay.. wheres jay??💀

 

@adorenyaa

probably 😴😴 ing

 

@pixxl

tag him @jayzaps @jayzaps

 

@adorenyaa

@jayzaps @jayzaps @jayzaps @jayzaps

 

@jayzaps

whatisit

 

@kaiyah

scroll

 

@jayzaps

OOO OK OK. sorry i was helping my mom😊

 

@adorenyaa

🙄 whatever

 

4:43 pm

 

kai and nyas private messages

@adorenyaa - nya

@kaiyah - kai

 

@adorenyaa

has mom/dad texted u?

 

@kaiyah

no🥳

@kaiyah

did they told us sumn that i didnt catch😊

 

@adorenyaa

nuh uh

@adorenyaa

i sended u a mystery birthday present thingy.. it says its delivered

@adorenyaa

what didchu get?

 

@kaiyah

a birthday wish👍

 

@adorenyaa

AWW THE BDAY BOY IS BEING EMO😥

 

@kaiyah

grrr bark bark woof woof hisssss🙄🙄🙄😡😡😠😠😠😠😠😡😡😠😠😠🤬🤬😡😡

 

@adorenyaa

doubt that they forgot about ur bday. THEY REMEMBERED LLOYDS.. i mean if they forgot lloyds, they forgot mines too..

 

@kaiyah

honestly nya? i don't fucking care😊

 

@adorenyaa

oh really? ok emo

 

@kaiyah

stop calling me emo. anw im gonna pickup zane bye sis

 

@adorenyaa

bye😘

Chapter 2: lloyds stalker

Notes:

THANK U FOR THE KUDOS!!! (ilysm)

Chapter Text

 

11:59 PM

RGB sibs

@laloyd - lloyd

@adorenyaa - nya

@kaiyah - kai

 

@laloyd

GUYS GUYS GUYS!

@laloyd

i thinj i have a stalker..

 

@adorenyaa

WGAT?!

@adorenya

hoe diud u knoe

 

@laloyd

are u ok..

 

@adorenyaa

im fin im earting

 

@laloyd

UHM.. ok, i thought ure home-

@laloyd

ANYWAYS.. i think i have a stalker

 

@adorenyaa

how

 

@laloyd

they liked one of my posts.

 

@adorenyaa

URE FAMOUS??? EVERY FAN OF URS LIKES UR POSTS..

 

@laloyd

NOO. I CHECKED THEIR ACCOUNT AND IT LOOKS SKETCHY!!!1111!!

 

@adorenyaa

AND HOW WOULD U KNOW ITS 'SKETCHY'??

 

@laloyd

just see it for ur self

 

@adorenyaa

OK. FINE, WHATS THE USER??

 

@laloyd

its @THATGURLLLL

 

@adorenyaa

LOL WHAT HWHWHA WHAT AHHAHAAHHAHAHAHA?? WHAT??

 

@laloyd

its giving the username is so.. not.. ERM..

 

@adorenyaa

its giving the heebie jeebies.

 

@laloyd

SOOO??

 

@adorenyaa

yea youre rgiht. wait, i feel we're missing someone..

 

@laloyd

KAI @kaiyah @kaiyah

 

@adorenyaa

OML UES @kaiyah @kaiyah @kaiyah @kaiyah

 

@laloyd

isnt he home?

@laloyd

he rarely go out. WHY ISNJT HE ANSWERING

 

@adorenyaa

a d8

 

@laloyd

... thats possible.

 

@adorenyaa

BUT WUTH WHUO??

 

@laloyd

dunno. COLE??

@laloyd

OMFL

 

@adorenyaa

lloyd ure tripping me OWT

 

@laloyd

what the hell is OWT

 

@adorenyaa

out**

 

@kaiyah

SHUT THE FUCK UP

 

@laloyd

LOOK WHO FINALLY SHOWS UP

 

@adorenyaa

wherw were u

 

@kaiyah

the grocery stoer

@kaiyah

shopping our monthly stuffs.. why????

 

@laloyd

we thought u went on a date

 

@kaiyah

what makes u think that i went ON A FUCKING DATE??

 

@laloyd

erm..

 

@adorenyaa

KAI, LLOYD HAS A STALKER

 

@kaiyah

OML WHAT WHTA WHAT WGATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

 

@laloyd

oh no

 

silly vigilantes

@laloyd - lloyd

@adorenyaa - nya

@kaiyah - kai

@colesstones - cole

@zanejulin - zane

@jayzaps - jay

@pixxl - pixal

@skylore - skylor

 

12:20 AM

 

@kaiyah

WHOS STALKING MY LITTLE BROTHER???!!!

 

@jayzaps

wdym kai

 

@kaiyah

SOME 'GIRL' IS STALKING LLOYD.. their user is @THATGURLLLL

 

@jayzaps

LMAO WHAT AHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

 

@adorenyaa

IKR IKR LIKE.. LOL AHAHHAHAHA

 

@pixxl

jayxnya 4everrrr

 

@zanejulin

'jaya'

 

@kaiyah

NO. no NNO NONONO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! no nya x someone NO

 

@zanejulin

why kai? jealous?

 

@kaiyah

NO WHAT E.W. ICK EWEWEWEWE

 

@pixxl

seems like kai is jealous

 

@laloyd

OK OK. um, BACK TO THE TOPIC?

 

@zanejulin

i have a feeling that its harumi again.

 

@adorenyaa

WHAT

 

@kaiyah

didnt we kill her last time

 

@jayzaps

villains.. keep getting those plot armors ugh

 

@skylore

think shes harmless guys :)

 

@kaiyah

harmless.. such an interesting word but CANT SHE FUCKK OFF FROM LLOYD??

 

@jayzaps

she wont move on..

 

@laloyd

i only love green guys

 

@colesstones

what about that weird girl who can transform to wolves

 

@laloyd

shes nothing

 

@kaiyah

U MET A GIRL?? WITHOUT TEELLING ME??

 

@laloyd

shes just a fly..CHILL

 

@kaiyah

whatevssssssssssssssssssz. im telling mom n dad

 

@laloyd

WHAT

 

the smiths

@laloyd - lloyd

@adorenyaa - nya

@kaiyah - kai

@raiyah - ray smith

@myass - maya smith

 

12:47 AM

 

@kaiyah

MOM, DAD.. LLOYD HAS A GIRLFRIEND AND A STALKER AND A SECOND PERSON

 

@myass

WHAT??

 

@laloyd

THATS lies LIES LIES LIESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

 

@raiyah

LLOYDDDDDDDDDDDD?

 

@laloyd

I WEARS DEAD

 

@raiyah

wears dead?

 

@laloyd

I SWEAR DAD

 

@kaiyah

HAHAHAHAH

 

@adorenyaa

kais lying

@adorenyaa

ALSO KAI HAS A BOYFRIEND

 

@myass

WHATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT?!

 

@raiyah

what

 

@kaiyah

WGAT NO?? NO I DONT.

 

@adorenyaa

u said 'hes a boy, HES HANDSOME, HOT, MUSCULAR.. but hes a fucking man-whore. is that even a word?' that

 

@kaiyah

NO I DIDNT

 

@raiyah

HOT AND MUSCULAR HUH? u have a taste son

 

@kaiyah

W H A T

 

@myass

is it one of your friends?

@myass

what was his name again.. coal??

 

@laloyd

COAL HAHAHAHHA

 

@adorenyaa

coal.. COAL.. HAHHAHAHAHA

 

@raiyah

i think its lou's son

@raiyah

and lilly's

 

@myass

ure right! our kai smith is going to be 'kai brookstone smith'

 

@laloyd

PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT

 

@raiyah

nahh, its gotta be 'kai smith brookstone'

 

@adorenyaa

THAT SOUNDS GOOD! WHERE IS HE?

 

@laloyd

probably blushing, smiling, rolling, jumping, dying, doing jumping jacks, flipping, delulu-ing on his bed

 

@adorenyaa

dont forget edging

 

@myass

NYA SMITH?

 

@adorenyaa

WHAT..?

 

@raiyah

edging..

 

@myass

right, you guys said lloyd has a stalker.. AGAIN. is it the same girl?

 

@adorenyaa

yes, we THINK. we're kinda unsure about it tho

 

@laloyd

also, shes/hes stalking kai too

 

@raiyah

hmm.. why would they be stalking kai?

 

@laloyd

HIS SECRET GIRLFIREND?! /jk

 

@raiyah

nah, he has a type

 

@kaiyah

thank u dad.

 

@adorenyaa

BUT. it could be skylor, she liked kai.. but then she found out shes a massive lesbian- but maybe shesss bisex?

 

@laloyd

HMM URE KINDA RIHGT.. BUT WHY WOULD SHE BE STALKING ME?

 

@adorenyaa

I DONKNOW

 

@myass

how 'bout we find out tomorrow?? ITS ALREADY 1 AM!! GO TO BED. NOW.

 

@adorenyaa

OK OK OK MOM

 

1:09 AM

Chapter 3: weird discoveries

Summary:

im not going to type their usernames IN the fiction now...
@laloyd - lloyd
@adorenyaa - nya
@kaiyah - kai
@colesstones - cole
@zanejulin - zane
@jayzaps - jay
@skylore - skylor
@pixxl - pixal
@raiyah - ray
@myass - maya

Notes:

this is pure chaos. (a part 2 of lloyds stalker) (a long chapter)

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

09:56 AM

the smiths

@raiyah, @myass, @adorenyaa, @kaiyah, @laloyd

 

@myass

GOOD MORNING KIDS! lets be detectives

 

@laloyd

...

@laloyd

OOO OK🙀🙀

 

@adorenyaa

kai is still sleeping

 

@raiyah

we know

@raiyah

thats why we have to do it before he wakes up☺️

 

@adorenyaa

great idea🥰

@adorenyaa

SOOO.. where do we start?

 

@myass

you both question your friends while me and ray stalk the stalker🤗

 

@adorenyaa

okok

 

@laloyd

OKAAAAAY🥳

 

@adorenyaa

why are you so hyped up about this? 😊

 

silly vigilantes

@adorenyaa, @laloyd, @zanejulin, @colesstones, @jayzaps, @kaiyah, @pixxl, @skylore

 

@laloyd

GUYSYSYSYSYSY

@laloyd

anyone got sumn about my stalker? 🥰

 

@jayzaps

I GOT SOMETHINF SOMETHING

 

@adorenyaa

what is it jay

 

@jayzaps

the stalker is a girlll😊

 

@adorenyaa

😲😲😲😲😲😲

 

@laloyd

noted.

 

@pixxl

the stalker doesnt have a life

 

@laloyd

what..

 

@pixxl

shes always online😗

 

@adorenyaa

ok..

 

@laloyd

noted? 😥

 

@colesstones

the stalker also often stalks kai😠

 

@laloyd

😭😭 OK

 

@colesstones

AND the stalker followed kai first

 

@laloyd

HOW WOULD YOU KNOW THAT..?

 

@colesstones

boyfriend instincts

 

@adorenyaa

LMAO

 

@zanejulin

i found the stalkers main account

 

@colesstones

WHAT? oh right hes a nindroid

 

@laloyd

wwhat is it zane??

 

@zanejulin

well, i dont think this is very surprising but its @rumimi

a.k.a harumi

 

@colesstones

WHYW WOULD SHE STALK KAI??

 

@laloyd

oh no harumi has a new target.. 😥😥🥺🥺

 

@pixxl

hahahahaha

 

@jayzaps

cant wait to see her beaten up🥳 (by kai)

 

@laloyd

theres 2 meaning of getting beaten up.. i hope its NOT THE OTHER ONE😰

 

@adorenyaa

what if.. jay meant.. the other one..😨😨😨

 

@laloyd

jay. you meant the other other one right..

 

@jayzaps

no i meant THE OTHER ONE😈

 

@colesstones

dont make me imagine stuffs i dont want to imagine😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡

@colesstones

IM COMING TO YOUR HOUSE JAY😡

 

@zanejulin

coles going on rage mode😲

 

@colesstones

im going to haunt your fucking dreams jay /srs

 

@jayzaps

oh no he said fuck... im dead.😰😭😭

 

@laloyd

thast why dont mess up with my brother in law jay🙄

 

@adorenyaa

im not gonna defend you today jay sorry🥰🥰😘 stay safe honey🤗

 

@jayzaps

😨😨😨😨😨

 

the smiths

@raiyah, @myass, @adorenyaa, @kaiyah, @laloyd

 

@adorenyaa

mom we found her identity

 

@myass

GOOD! we found her identity too

 

@adorenyaa

ok.. you first😊

 

@myass

ok ok, its skylor

 

@laloyd

what

 

@adorenyaa

.. zane said its harumi..☺️

 

@myass

huh

 

@raiyah

only one way to find out

 

@adorenyaa

NO! lloyd IS NOT GOING TO TEXT THAT BITCH

 

@laloyd

how did you guys knew it was skylor?

 

@raiyah

her following list has skylor in it and skylor follows  back.. 😀

 

@laloyd

whatt? but zane said its harumi. AND HES A NINDROID.

 

@raiyah

only one way to find out..

 

@laloyd

ugh fine

@laloyd

ill dm her🙄

 

lloyd and harumi's private messages

@laloyd, @rumimi

 

@laloyd

harumi

@laloyd

are you stalking kai?

 

@rumimi

what💀

@rumimi

why would i do that..💀💀💀

@rumimi

no way someone actually stalk him??

@rumimi

i mean he is hot☺️

 

@laloyd

...ok.

@laloyd

bye

 

the smiths

@raiyah, @myass, @adorenyaa, @kaiyah, @laloyd

 

@adorenyaa

MOM WHAT DO I DOOO???!!

 

@myass

STAY CALM AND CHECK HIS PULSE!!!!1!1!1!

 

@laloyd

whats happening..

 

@adorenyaa

kai isnt waking up😰

 

@laloyd

he took pills.. yesterday night..🤗

 

@adorenyaa

oh. ok

 

@myass

what did harumi said?

 

@laloyd

its not her... even thooo she said kai is hot💀

 

@adorenyaa

IMMA TEXT SKYLOR😊

 

nya and skylor's private messages

@adorenyaa, @skylore

 

@adorenyaa

sky.

@adorenyaa

ARE YOU THE STALKER???

@adorenyaa

be honest, sky.

 

@skylore

no- i thought the stalker was harumi??? WHATT?

 

@adorenyaa

TURNS OUT.. ITS NOT HER..

 

@skylore

nya. i swear to the FSM im not the stalker😭

 

@adorenyaa

hmm.. ok. i believe you😊

 

@skylore

THANK U!!!

 

the smiths

@raiyah, @myass, @adorenyaa, @kaiyah, @laloyd

 

@kaiyah

what the fuck

 

@myass

KAII.. GOODMORNING SONN..

 

@kaiyah

morning mom😊

@kaiyah

are we investigating the stalker?

 

@adorenyaa

yes and we're done bye i got the answer bye

 

@kaiyah

...ok😊

 

lloyd and nya's private messages

@laloyd, @adorenyaa

 

@laloyd

so it was skylor?

 

@adorenyaa

no. i lied about that😘

 

@laloyd

...

@laloyd

SO WHO IS IT??

 

@adorenyaa

ion know.

 

@laloyd

we need kai's help😭

 

@adorenyaa

we cant. or else kai will go nuts😗

@adorenyaa

hes also still half plastered since yesterday night

 

@laloyd

youre right..😔

 

@adorenyaa

lets TAKE A BREATH AND WE WILL CONTINUE AGAIN.

 

11:38 AM

Notes:

kai had a rough night😨

Chapter 4: its ronin!

Notes:

so i didnt upload.. right on time.. cuz.. i 'accidently' forgot about ao3.. wow uhm im totally not lying.
anyways.. the final reveal of lloyds stalker!

also i changed the way i wrote their texts and stuffs- cuz the old one sucks and looks weird and its stupid.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

@adorenyaa & @laloyd's DMs

twinsies

 

adorenyaa

lloyd. i think ik who the stalker is

 

laloyd

and.. who is it?

pls be right this time.

 

adorenyaa

cole! like, isnt it obvious? he even said some suspicious stuffs at sv.. LIKE..??

'the stalker stalks kai the most'

'the stalker followed kai first'

UHM.. how the heck did he knew these things?

 

laloyd

ure right.. oml lets ask him now :D

also u ask him, im gunna shower i havent showered HAHA

ok bye sis

 

adorenyaa

ew. ok bye shower rightly pls u stink when u dont

 

@colesstones & @adorenyaa's DMs

wet rock, rock who is wet

 

adorenyaa

cole

 

colesstones

whats up?

 

adorenyaa

youre the stalker.. right?

dont lie cole.

 

colesstones

..what makes you think im the stalker??

i swear to the FSM.. IM NOT THE FUCKING STALKER!?

is it because i said 'the stalker stalks kai often' and blabla?

 

adorenyaa

uh yes

 

colesstones

nya trust me, im not the stalker.

why would i stalk kai when he gives me his pictures 24/7

 

adorenyaa

HE WHAT?

 

colesstones

uhm

i shouldnt have said

 

adorenyaa

im so gonna tell dad about this.. AND MOM.

 

colesstones

like they would believe

 

adorenyaa

oh they would

 

colesstones

ok.. i guess?

bye

 

adorenyaa

bye

 

@adorenyaa & @laloyd's DMs

twinsies

 

adorenyaa

lloyd

kai gives cole his fucking selfies 24/7

we should really take his phone and check

since hes half-alive..

 

laloyd

wtf

thats gay lol what..

 

adorenyaa

HEKPP IKR THATS SOO GAY

 

laloyd

and they said 'we're not dating'

and they do this:

 

adorenyaa

wait i bet cole sends him dp

 

laloyd

wtf

ew

 

adorenyaa

HAHA

i beett though

 

laloyd

what if he does send kai dp

like

LMAOOOAOAOAOAOA im gonna be traumatized

but fr tho

 

adorenyaa

saying 'dp' is so weird?? like help

 

laloyd

uhm beside 'dp topic'

is the stalker cole?

 

adorenyaa

no. sadly-

 

laloyd

then who tf is it?????

 

adorenyaa

IDEKK.

 

laloyd

ugh

 

adorenyaa

:D

uhm lets tell mom n dad about this topics.. especially the cole n kai one

not the dp one tho thats js a guess and its grosss..

 

laloyd

okok

 

the smiths

@adorenyaa, @kaiyah. @laloyd. @myass,  & @raiyah

family of the century

 

adorenyaa

mom.. dad.. me and lloyd have sumn to tell you :(

and its weird but great news

cuz kai is not single anymore

 

kaiyah

WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN NYA??

 

laloyd

mom.. kai and cole are dating.

 

adorenyaa

yes mom thats true theyre gay for eachother

 

myass

isnt cole gay

 

raiyah

ok

cool son

 

adorenyaa

...

 

kaiyah

IMNOTDATINGUFUCKINGLITTLEDIPSHITS

WHYAMIWRITINGLIKETHISHELP

 

laloyd

kai sends cole his own selfies

 

kaiyah

who tf told u that what no i dont ugh what no thats not true

 

myass

ok. WHAT??

we're coming home next week.

 

raiyah

texting lou rn..

 

kaiyah

HOLD UP WHAT

 

adorenyaa

i have proof

*pretend she sended THE SCREENSHOT OF HER AND COLES CONVO*

 

kaiyah

OMIFUCKINGGOD

NO I DONT

 

laloyd

wait werent u half dead half alive like few minutes ago

 

kaiyah

sorry this topic awakens me cuz its about me and the loml. HLP?

WHY DID IJAX

QNZW

AXMZWZNEJKXAHSKJGD

 

laloyd

he confessed! ❤

 

adorenyaa

jay when he is lovesick:

 

kaiyah

STOP

 

raiyah

wait nya.. why didnt you add jay? since hes part of the family now

 

adorenyaa

great idea

 

@adorenyaa added @jayzaps

 

jayzaps

uh

what

am i welcome here now.. 😊

 

myass

you were always welcomed :D

nya just forgot to add you

 

jayzaps

💔

wait whats happening

 

laloyd

kai n cole are dating

 

jayzaps

what

HAHA

HAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAAH skylor owes me 20 bucks

 

kaiyah

U BETTED ON THAT??

 

jayzaps

duh

 

adorenyaa

wait guys someone js texted me-

 

jayzaps

who?

 

adorenyaa

ronin

 

kaiyah

I. AM. NOT. DATING. COLE.

 

@adorenyaa, @roninstealsyourwife's DMs

hot person and watering can

 

roninstealsyourwife

nya

your friend

the red one is so goofy! 😂

he also seems the person who is fun to hangout with

 

adorenyaa

wdym.. also hey ronin

you mean my brother?

 

roninstealsyourwife

yea yea the pretty one

also can you like

follow me on my new account?

i mean, i still use this the new one is for backup

 

adorenyaa

ok, whats the user?

 

roninstealsyourwife

@THATGURLLLL

that

 

adorenyaa

ure fucking kidding me right

ronin? whys the username like that.

 

roninstealsyourwife

i was going to change it

but i dont know?

 

adorenyaa

HAHA- RONIN?? URE STALKING US??

 

roninstealsyourwife

no

is checking out your friends for a longg time is wrong?

 

adorenyaa

YES. ESPECIALLY WITH MY FUCKING BROTHER

ok yes i will follow it

 

roninstealsyourwife

okay thanks nya

Notes:

uhm.. surpriseee? :D

i know this is so random but just go with the flow :c

Chapter 5: traffic and tamales

Summary:

brookstones-centric.. (father and son time😍)

posted again cuz.. ion knoe😋

Notes:

uhh guys.. lou is cole's no. 1 supporter!!

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

@colesstones & @lourbs

uhh father and son 💯💯

 

lourbs

son..

 

colesstones

wgat what huh yes?

 

lourbs

ray say your dating kai

 

colesstones

uhhhhhhh what.. OHH

 

lourbs

??

 

colesstones

uhh dad you need more english lessons..

 

lourbs

uh ok

later

but answer that

 

colesstones

no

uhh no im not dating him

 

lourbs

no me mientas

 

colesstones

I SWEAR DAD IM NOT LYING

 

lourbs

🙄

fine

 

colesstones

WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY FINE?? YOU WERE HOPING ME TO SAY YES???? WHAT

 

lourbs

yes

 

colesstones

?? HWTA ??

 

lourbs

? whats hwta? is that a new word at english ?

 

colesstones

no thats a typo

 

lourbs

whats typo

 

colesstones

uhh misspelled typing?? I DONT KNOW..

 

lourbs

ok

i made tamales your favevorite

 

colesstones

uhh ok im still stuck at the traffic..

also its favorite

not favevorite

 

lourbs

ok

 

colesstones

dad.. we've been living here for like.. 7 years.. why isnt your english getting better??

 

lourbs

idk

 

colesstones

...

did you just said idk

 

lourbs

uh yes, is that wrong?

 

colesstones

uhh no

 

lourbs

uh ok

 

colesstones

'uhh' 'uh'

dad we're fr father and son we dont need any dna test

 

lourbs

??

 

colesstones

nevermind..

 

lourbs

ohh i know

we dont need banana tests

dna*

 

colesstones

what..

 

lourbs

is typo like u said

 

colesstones

...

its not like that dad😢

 

lourbs

why u crying

 

colesstones

WHO IS TEACHING YOU THIS SHORTFORMS??

 

lourbs

ray

 

colesstones

uhh.. ook.. 😢

im not crying thats just humor

 

lourbs

humor.. ok

 

colesstones

uh the traffic is finally moving..

nos vemos

 

lourbs

cya

 

colesstones

...

Notes:

HELP?? MY TOES ARE GIGGLING TOO

also uhh in this fic theres has to be 0 angst cuz uhm i have some love and hate relationship with angst.. (thats why i made cole's dad supports him HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAH)

short chapter cuz i can💯💯💯

Chapter 6: lloyd downloaded a dating app

Summary:

"can i download a dating app?"

"a what."

Notes:

i got AP+ on physics.. finally i can breathe

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

twin tuition

@adorenyaa, @laloyd

 

laloyd

nya

can i download a dating app🥰

 

adorenyaa

what. 😭

WHAT???

lloyd what kind of rock hit you today

 

laloyd

i ddint hit anyhting

 

adorenyaa

WHY THE HECK WOULD YOU WANT A DATING APP??

 

laloyd

suck it nya

ive downloaded tinder❤️

 

adorenyaa

WHAT??

kai is so going to kill us😔

 

laloyd

hmm

i made my account

 

adorenyaa

😭😭

 

silly vigilantes

@adorenyaa, @colesstones, @jayzaps, @kaiyah, @laloyd, @pixxl, @skylore, @zanejulin

 

laloyd

guys

i downloaded a dating app

and made an account

 

adorenyaa

NAHH LLOYD WHAT IS WRONG WITH U??

 

kaiyah

...

the actual fuck😡

 

laloyd

oops

nya told me to download it🤷

 

adorenyaa

WHAT

NO I DIDN'T

YOU STINKING BUZZ BRAIN

 

colesstones

😲😲

😰😰

 

jayzaps

I'm not doing this😔

byebye 👋

 

jayzaps left the group chat

 

colesstones

same

👋👋👋👋

 

colesstones left the group chat

 

skylore

bye☺️

goodluck @adorenyaa and @laloyd 😘

 

skylore left the group chat

 

zanejulin left the group chat

 

pixxl

well👍

tata👋

 

pixxl left the group chat

laloyd left the group chat

 

adorenyaa

WHAT. 😭😭

 

kaiyah

😡

 

kai's rage escape

@colesstones, @laloyd, @skylore, @pixxl, @jayzaps, @zanejulin

 

@laloyd made this group chat.

 

pixxl

lloyd, you left too?

i felt like i was in a horror movie

 

zanejulin

i was trembling in fear

 

colesstones

i hate traffics my tamales aren't hot😔

 

skylore

that was true horror

 

laloyd

i actually didnt download a dating app

js wanted to prank kai n nya☺️

i think it has gotten too far

and yes

i left too

 

jayzaps

idont think nya will just surrender likr that😔

 

laloyd

i think ure right jay...

oh no i think they will destroy kai's flat

 

colesstones

ur fault

 

laloyd

I KNOW.

 

zanejulin

how will we fix this?

i do not think we can

 

pixxl

😦

there is a 80% that kai will surrender and the rest 20% is the opposite

 

laloyd

ARE YOUY SURE???

 

pixxl

i am sure

kai is a hot head, but he is not THAT much of a hot head

 

jayzaps

i hope youre right pixal 😢

 

meanwhile, with kai and nya...

 

silly vigilantes

@adorenyaa, @kaiyah

 

@kaiyah changed the group name into "just KAI and NYA noe."

 

kaiyah

sis

am i that scary

 

adorenyaa

nahh they're js overreactingggg

 

kaiyah

arw you surw

 

adorenyaa

yes. 100%

also hwow did you know lloyd was lying?

 

kaiyah

YOU KNOW HIM. HE ALWAYS PULL STUPID PRANKS ON US 😒

and there is no way lloyd would download a dating app

 

adorenyaa

true...

 

kaiyah

i think i am that scary nya

they're not coming backf

 

adorenyaa

wait

here.

 

twin tuition

@adorenyaa, @laloyd

 

adorenyaa

lloyd

we knoe ure lying 😏

 

laloyd

HOW

oh is it bcz im too shy and introverted that i totally wouldnt download such things like that?

 

adorenyaa

you js repeated what kai said

 

laloyd

fine

add the others back

im gunna apologize ❤🥰

 

adorenya

okokoookokok

 

just KAI and NYA noe.

@adorenyaa, @kaiyah

 

adorenyaa

add them back bro

 

kaiyah

wuth pleassure

 

@kaiyah added @zanejulin

@kaiyah added @colesstones

@kaiyah added @laloyd

@kaiyah added @pixxl

@kaiyah added @jayzaps

@kaiyah added @skylore

 

skylore

oh

they knew

 

colesstones

MY TAMALES ARE COLDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

 

jayzaps

just eat it cole

 

laloyd

sorry gusy 🤓

 

zanejulin

fry them again cole

 

colesstones

oh right

 

pixxl

how can kai be inlove with him?

 

zanejulin

i do not think the question is that,

its "why are they inlove with eachother?"

 

kaiyah

easy:

1. we're both idiots

2. im hot & he's hotter

3. i cant cook and he can cook (kinda)

4. i could eat air all day and he can buy online food

5. he's rich and i am broke

6. we're bestfriends since..

7. he would marry me and i wouldnt

8. our parents agrees

9. there is no 3rd person in the party

10. im so cool and hes awesome

theres still many stuffs

 

adorenyaa

knew it

they are dating 💯💯

 

colesstones

KAI FUCKING SSMITH 😒

 

laloyd

heuhe

 

kaiyah

suck jay's dick nya 🙄

 

jayzaps

...

😨😨😨

SUCK COLE'S KAI!!!!!!!!1!!!!111!!!!!!!!!

 

colesstones

he did

 

kaiyah

BROOKSTONE 😨

WHEN?! 😢😨

 

colesstones

😏

 

zanejulin

suck eachother's dicks

 

kaiyah

😨

i taught him that

Notes:

i.. i cringed

Chapter 7: another ordinary day with the ninjas

Summary:

this is them when they're bored:

Notes:

ugh i decided to post one of the drafts cuz I CANT THINK OF SOME SHIT

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

the smiths

@adorenyaa,  @laloyd  @myass, @kaiyah,  @raiyah, @jayzaps

 

kaiyah

hey gusyd

🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

 

adorenyaa

hey kai

uh why are you doing that.

 

kaiyah

doing whatatatattatatta 😍🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰😘😘😘

 

laloyd

why are you.. "🥰🥰🥰" - ing?

 

kaiyah

oh notuughf

🤗🤗

 

raiyah

ugh your typo is so much worse than lou's

 

kaiyah

wait whgat

😲

😘😘😘😘😊😊😊☺️☺️☺️

 

laloyd

i think cole humped him

 

kaiyah

wiat but.. i kinda wished he did 😲🤔

WfHAT..NO + i wush ghe did + i totaakly didnt wish he didd + i dif

 

myass

nuh huh

no humping

till you're married

 

kaiyah

🙄🙄

still tho

 

jayzaps

*sends a picture of cole*

 

myass

huh

such an interesting picture..

 

raiyah

now thats what i call hot🔥

 

kaiyah

WHATDIFH XISJ EJEHE WHAT THE GECK DAD??

WHAT IN THE GALLOPING GARGOYLES

di I JS READ?? 😭😭

 

myass

@raiyah 🦄🦄🦄🦄🦄🦄🦄

 

raiyah

i found men hot too

/nsrs

 

kaiyah

mom did you know this

liek know know knee knwoe

 

myass

yes of course i do

 

kaiyah

uh what

SINCE WHEN??

 

myass

since we met☺️

 

kaiyah

oh

 

jayzaps

*sends a picture of cole again*

 

kaiyah

jay

STOP SENDING THOSE PICTURES OF HIM WHAT THE FUCK

 

jayzaps

why 😪

 

kaiyah

uhm cuz hes too hot to be seen 😛

ALSO WHY THE FUCK DO YOU HAVE THAT BUNCH OF HIS PICTURES??

 

jayzaps

cuz..

cuzzzz

cuz.

IDK I JUST HAVE THEM IN MY PICTURES SOMEHOW

 

kaiyah

KYS

DELETE THEM ALL. NOW.

 

jayzaps

yeah no mhmhm 😘

 

laloyd

stop fighting

 

adorenyaa

like a married couple

 

kaiyah

OMYGOODDYBROWNYLOCKS FUCK WHAT

THAT BIRD is definitely the person I WOULD NEVER. EVER. MARRY.

 

adorenyaa

yeah rioght

you even wanted to marry zane in the start

 

kaiyah

um sis..

its not my fucking faukt that robotts I MENA NINDROids COULD BE THAT HOT

 

adorenyaa

oh right. he's your bisexual awakening🙄

 

kaiyah

i know right? i fuckin' rock 😍🥰😘

also dont make me remember those days omifuckingof

 

adorenyaa

"HOW THE FUCK CAN A NINDROID BE THAT FUCKING HOT??"

 

kaiyah

SHUT THE HELL UP NYa

 

myass

oh. so kai liked the handsome nindroid boy?

 

raiyah

oooo 👍👍👍

no wonder they became besties 😍😘🥰

he's hot too!!

 

kaiyah

omfg😊😘

gunna kms🥰😜😜😜🔥🔥🥺🥺😲😲

 

jayzaps

wait.

what.

does zane knows about this??

cuz i dont..

OMG HE DOESNT KNOW DOES HE

 

adorenyaa

no🤗

he decided to keep his long gone crush secret 🥺

cuz UHM kai knew that zane ❤ pixal are a real deal

 

kaiyah

UGH SHUT TH FUCK UP

 

alvin (kai) and the chipmunks (slaves)

@jayzaps,  @kaiyah,  @laloyd, @colesstones, @zanejulin

 

jayzaps

@zanejulin

kai likes/d you 😘

 

kaiyah

fuck what

i would rather fuck benthomaar😰😰

 

jayzaps

WHY THE HELL..

WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT?

 

laloyd

healp LMAOAKOAOAOOA

 

jayzaps

gotta show this to the girlies

 

*jay took a screenshot*

 

silly vigilantes

@adorenyaa, @laloyd, @kaiyah, @colesstones, @jayzaps, @zanejulin, @pixxl, @skylore

 

jayzaps

*sends the screenshot*

@everyone

 

adorenyaa

LOL WHAT LMAO

 

pixxl

looks like kai prefers men

 

kaiyah

I WOULD RATHER FUCK RYAN

 

skylore

who the hell is ryan 😨

 

laloyd

RYAN GOSLING LMAO

 

colesstones

no way

the ken dude??

 

kaiyah

yes hun

 

colesstones

whats with your type

 

kaiyah

💍💍💍💍💍💍💍 marry me

 

colesstones

🙅♂️🙅♂️🙅♂️🙅♂️🙅♂️🙅♂️🙅♂️🙅♂️🙅♂️

 

kaiyah

FUCK WHAT

 

laloyd

i feel tears falling down

lava angst hurts so much

it feels like..

IVE BEEN STABBED THOUSANDS OF TIMES IN THE BACK 😫

 

kaiyah

lloyd

ur acting is shitty as fuck

but holy fucking shitballs ure right 💔

 

zanejulin

@kaiyah 💍?

 

kaiyah

OMIFUCKINGGOD

😲😲😲😲😲😲

 

colesstones

WAIT NO

WHAT

WAIT WHAT NO MARYR ME WHAT NO NO

 

kaiyah

shut up COAL

😍😍😍😍

@zanejulin ❤️🩹

 

jayzaps

uh oh

better luck next time COAL

 

pixxl

huh

well, @adorenyaa 💍?

 

jayzaps

WAIT HOLD UP WHAT

wahwhat. SHES MY FIANCEE?! 😠😠

 

colesstones

AND HE IS MY BOYFRIEND??? 😡😡

 

kaiyah

yes

and?

 

adorenyaa

DAMN

kai YOU LISTEN TO ARIANA GRANDE??

 

kaiyah

ugh what

oh

shut up its a good shit okay??

AND

i listen to good shit 🙄

 

colesstones

WHAT WHAT WHAT.

WHAT????????????????????

DID KAI JUST "YES, AND?"-ED ME???

OMG WAOWIUHIURQ3Q

 

jayzaps

AND

AND AND AND

NYA JUST DITCHED ME 😭😭😭😭😭😭

 

zanejulin

oops

 

pixxl

my bad

 

laloyd

you guys are so gay

 

adorenyaa

...

ure such a party pooper istg 🤦♀️

 

laloyd

I DIDNT MEAN TO

 

kaiyah

wow lloyd you're a buzz killer

 

laloyd

noOOOOOOOOOOO

I DIDNT EAN TO

 

kaiyah

ngh

 

colesstones

uh what

 

 

Notes:

watch me FLOP and FAIL miserably making these insanely awesome and epic chapters

Chapter 8: hungry

Summary:

i suck at making summaries so just read it

Notes:

hi yes it's been a very long time I know but I'm still alive if you're wondering
(im sorry for the person i promised i had something special for you i dont have anything special for you, all i have is my love for you ❤)

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

silly vigilantes

@adorenyaa, @laloyd, @kaiyah, @colesstones, @jayzaps, @zanejulin, @pixxl, @skylore

kaiyah

YOW WAZZUP DIMWITSSSSSSSSSSSSZZZZZZ

i got a new guitar from fender

YES I WAS GONE FOR 5 HOURS PICKING

OH AND ALSO ITS RED

finally a red FUCKING GUITAR

 

colesstones

dontchu already have one??

 

kaiyah

no

 

colesstones

DIDNT I GAVE YOU??

 

kaiyah

no

maybe

ionnow

 

colesstones

ok

 

jayzaps

waiguys my phone is alive

 

adorenyaa

what

 

laloyd

oh no

he ate

 

kaiyah

no way bro ate pills

 

jayzaps

NO IM SRIISU LITERALLY

*sends a screenshot that looks like jay dm'ed the rock*

I NEVER TOUCHED HIS INSTAGRAM PROFIELFK

 

laloyd

no way he messaged cole's twin

 

jayzaps

NO I DIDNT KEMJWH

 

kaiyah

HOLY FUCKING SHITBALLS

HELP THE WAY HE TEXTED HIM "hey rock my friend looks lik u"

NGAHHAHAHAHA

 

jayzaps

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

 

adorenyaa

i dont know how to genuinely react

all i can do is die and laugh

 

colesstones

U TAGGED ME TOO

 

kaiyah

HAHAHAHAH

 

jayzaps

OMG I DIDNT TEXT HIMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

i swear to my mom

 

kaiyah

which one

edna or theee de one

blonde one*

 

adorenyaa

oh i almost went to jail

 

laloyd

HAHAH

 

jayzaps

i almost be the dark knight (batman)

 

colesstones

*insert that one laughing audio*

 

adorenyaa

guys im hungry

 

laloyd

ok

so?

 

adorenyaa

lets go to the park beside chen's noodles 🥰

 

kaiyah

im broke

and im sick of ramen and noodles

 

adorenyaa

WE'RE NOT EATING NOODLES WE'RE GONNA EAT AT THE PARK

i heard theres some good food there and also ill pay everything u guys buy 😘

 

jayzaps

what happened

ddid u got a raise or something

 

adorenyaa

yes i did now shut up and kai will drive

 

kaiyah

WHY ME WHY NOT COLE

 

colesstones

im still emo bcuz of cold tamales thats why

 

kaiyah

UGH WHY DID I CHOSE HIM OVER SKYLOR

 

colesstones

ouch

 

skylor

maybe because i cheated on youu 😍

 

kaiyah

oh right

ok im driving

wait what about zane and pixal

 

adorenyaa

i think they're already at the park

 

 

30 minutes lateur...

 

alvin (kai) and the chipmunks (slaves)

@jayzaps,  @kaiyah,  @laloyd, @colesstones, @zanejulin

kaiyah

guys nya is taking so long its been 30 minutes

 

colesstones

YEAH I CAN COUNT HOW MANY MY STOMACH HAS BEEN MAKING SOUNDS

 

jayzaps

what is she doing anyways

 

kaiyah

IONNOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

 

laloyd

ugh just step on the pedal kai idgaf

 

kaiyah

lloyd ure in the same place with me wont u say that in person

 

laloyd

so nya cant hear us

 

kaiyah

oh

ok

 

colesstones

LISTEN TO LLOYDDDDDDDDDDDDD!1!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

 

kaiyah

okmfg

shes finally here

 

laloyd

ugh

shouldve left her

 

kaiyah

fr

 

Notes:

short chapter, sorry. BE GRATEFUL FOR WHAT I GAVE.

Chapter 9: food hunting

Summary:

um what the title says..

Notes:

guys i know i said its a texting fic BUT LOGICALLY.. WHY WOULD THEY COMMUNICATE THROUGH TEXT OR DMS IF THEY'RE NEAR IN PERSON

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

They look around amazed by the beauty of food stalls each one with their own uniqueness, the smell, the sizzling sounds, all of those made them even more hungry. They formed a circled and discussed on what to eat first.

Nya pulled out her phone, and sends a map of the place. "OK theres four areas, Mexican, American, Japanese and Korean."

"So, each areas has their own different foods?" Kai cocked his head.

"Yep."

"What if we just get a reservation and divide into three teams, then we search for food in different areas?" Lloyd suggested a plan.

"That's actually a great idea, yes we could do that." Nya exclaimed. "Why are you guys just standing there? Giddy up!"

 

———

 

silly vigilantes

@adorenyaa, @laloyd, @kaiyah, @colesstones, @jayzaps, @zanejulin, @pixxl, @skylore

kaiyah

guys i swear cole has been choosing A BREAD FOR ABOUT AN HOUR MINUTES HELO ME

 

laloyd

L

 

jayzaps

kai's really questioning his decisions

 

kaiyah

help me im starving 😭

waitaminute

ION SEE HIM

 

jayzaps

i think he lrft u

 

kaiyah

i forgot my sunscreen

whateevr

 

jayzaps

😊

 

meant to be (maybe)

@kaiyah, @colesstones

we've fucked

kaiyah

COLE WHERE RHU

im starvingto death

ive bought the stuffs u ordered me to pls comeback😔

COLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

i might kms its hot here like m

COLE THERES A CAT OMG WOW ITS ORANGE 🥰🥰

bye im loving the cat instead of u

ure still not answering

KYS

COLEEEEEEE

fine when ure back ill love whisky and whispy more

 

THE OG SIBLINGS

@adorenyaa, @kaiyah

fuck lloyd

kaiyah

nya i found an orang cate

 

adorenyaa

i sww cole

 

kaiyah

WHERW

 

adorenyaa

walking into the Mexican area

 

kaiyah

thats our area 😭🙏🙏🙏🙏

 

adorenyaa

THEN FIND HIM U DIMWIT HES URS NOT MINES

 

kaiyah

I HATE YOUUUEUEUEUEU

 

meant to be (maybe)

@kaiyah, @colesstones

we've fucked

colesstones

kai sorry i was buying the food

where r u

 

kaiyah

AT YOUR DEAD ASS MOM'S BED

im still gonna love whisky and whispy more

 

colesstones

what.

fine im going alone then

 

kaiyah

WAIT NO NO I'M UH I'M IN FRONT OF THE UHH i'm infront of u

 

colesstones

oh

hi

 

kaiyah

hi

ok shut up this is weird

 

colesstones

ok

 

silly vigilantes

@adorenyaa, @laloyd, @kaiyah, @colesstones, @jayzaps, @zanejulin, @pixxl, @skylore

jayzaps

where are u @kaiyah @colesstones

theres only me nya n lloyd here

 

skylore

HMM

anyways am i invited im at the entrance..

 

jayzaps

OH OK SKYLOR GO TO TABLE NUMBER 14

UNDER THE NAME OF KAI SMITH OR COLE IDK I FORGOT

 

skylore

ok i brought vania too

 

adorenyaa

OK YES WE JUST NEED PIXALL

 

colesstones

*sends a picture of kai shouting at some old lady*

 

adorenyaa

idfc

 

colesstones

im coming

leaving kai here

omw

 

pixxl

me and zane are coming too, we're bringing our food too don't worry

 

colesstones

guys kai is literally cooking the lady

 

adorenyaa

IDFCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC

but let him cook though

Notes:

guys i think ill make a part 3 of this

Chapter 10: ride or die

Summary:

why does Jay always jinx something ridiculous?

Notes:

im gonna um type my opinion about colexgeo ❤️.

SO, i like or lovr colexgeo honestly its not a bad ship or WHATEVER.. but lava is my roman empire GUYS 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭.. anyways um colexgeo is cool. but i js want to question the writers about:

THE LACK OF COLE N KAI'S INTERACTIONS. like um HELLOOOOO???? knock knock screw u🙄

ever since DR started i noticed that THEY BOTH NEVER MET IN S1 (i kinda forgot about it I THINK THEY DID BUT IONNOW WHEN)

and drs2 got released, still, they both had a whole lsck of interaction. im very heartbroken 😔 IM BATMAN NOW☹️

ok thats alm

anyways this chapter has some mentioned adult topics in it so um that was a warning. fuck off if ure not allowed to read this 🥰‼️

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

siblings in law

@adorenyaa, @colesstones

we dont have a description for this

adorenyaa

cole

have u found kai

 

colesstones

no

I DONT SEE HIM AT ALL

 

adorenyaa

well thats a bummer

 

colesstones

um

you do know this is a bad thing rgiht

 

adorenyaa

yes thats why im calling the others to search for him too

 

colesstones

ok

im still hungry im gonna buy more of those potato thingies

 

adorenyaa

ok

 

silly vigilantes

@adorenyaa, @laloyd, @kaiyah, @colesstones, @jayzaps, @zanejulin, @pixxl, @skylore

adorenyaa

guys

kais missing

last seen arguing with the lady infront of the restaurant where they sell pesto sauced food kind of shit

 

zanejulin

🫡

 

jayzaps

yes ma'am

 

laloyd

excuse me i have to go to the bathroom first

 

adorenyaa

are you having a stomach ache

 

laloyd

no

maybe

idk

 

adorenyaa

whatever

anyways find kai pls hes our beloved driver (im saying this bcs hes willingly accepts everytime i asked him to drive)

 

jayzaps

imagine if we found kai when hes being chased by dogs

 

colesstones

would be funny.. but with a logical context

 

jayzaps

maybe the lady has dogs and since kai pissed her off

bark bark

 

adorenyaa

would be funny if it was actually true

 

36 minutes later...

 

kaiyah

GUYS

WHERE R U ALL

IM HIDING INSIDE A FUCKING TOILET THAT CRAZY ASS WOMAN HAS DOGS this toilet smells so ass i swear IT SMELLS LIKE SHIT I WANNA GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE SO BAD BUT I PARKED THE CAR DOZENS OF MILES AWAY FROM US BCUZ THE MAIN PARKING LOT IS FULL I HATE MY ASS RN FUCK IM SHITTING THOSE DOGS ARE WILD

bro i swear u guys need to get out asap i think she saw me hanging with u all

GOD DAMN THAT LADY IS FUCKING WICKED

she has fucking 2 dobermans fuck

SHIT I HEARD THOSE UGLY DOGS BARKING

im never ever going to argue with fucking rich ass old women 🙏

IM SORRY MS WHOEVER U ARE

IM GONNA KMS HERE

pls send helo 🥺

 

adorenyaa

BYE IM WHEEZING WHY DOES JAY ALWAYS HAVE TO JINX STUFFS

 

jayzaps

oops

guess im really magically special !

🤭

 

colesstones

which toilet what section/district r u on

 

kaiyah

I WAS MADE FOR LOVING U BABY U WERE MADE FOR LOVING MEEEE idk what toilrt am i in rn but this shit is banger im putting it on my spotify bro

this song is so epic guys what id this ITS AN ABSOLUTE MASTERPIECE

ok anyways

im near some trucks

 

colesstones

isn't that the kiss song

 

kaiyah

THE WHAT SONG?? WHAT

 

colesstones

the song is made by a band named KISS

 

 

adorenyaa

oh wait

i think i know where he is

hes at the american section I DON'T KNOW WHICH DISTRICT THO

 

laloyd

WHAT

theres over 40+ districts here and 12 of them in the American section 😋‼️

kys kai

fucking ass face

 

adorenyaa

LLOYD COOK HIM UP ‼️‼️

 

jayzaps

guess we're biking today

 

colesstones

fuck u mean by biking jay

 

jayzaps

well, since the americn section is like 20+ districts away im not walking my ass there

we should rent a bike

every district enterance has a renting thing IDK WHAT ITS CALLED 

 

kaiyah

oh

maybe we should meet up at our car and get out of here quickly

 

jayzaps

where did u park our car at

 

kaiyah

think it was at district 47

😁

 

adorenyaa

kys kai burn urself

 

kaiyah

IM SORR

 

adorenyaa

how many dogs are there

 

kaiyah

ionnow

it was 2 dogs i think

 

jayzaps

idont think those are her dogs bro

 

kaiyah

wdym

 

jayzaps

I THINK THEY'RE THE PARK'S DOGS

 

kaiyah

oh

well fuck myself

um guys

i dont hear any barking anymore

fuck

WHERE DID THEY GO

 

jayzaps

why fuck urself

they're GONE for now SO DONT FUCK URSELF AND INSTEAD SEARCH FOR THE BIKE SMARTY PANTS

 

kaiyah

my bad my bad 😁‼️

oh and also dont ever call me smarty pants

 

jayzaps

why u were like one of the best rankings in skl 

 

kaiyah

UMM THAT WAS LIKE A LONG TIME AGO

 

laloyd

im still confused how did he pass that math test

HE DIDNT STUDY

OR PAY ATTENTION TO THR CLASS..

ARE U OAYING THEM SUMN KR WHAT

 

jayzaps

or maybe...

 

adorenyaa

me n @pixxl thought u slept with mr. oretsev 😜

 

kaiyah

U GUYS SERIOUSLY HAVE SOMR CRAAZY ASS BRAINS

 

adorenyaa

what u were the definition of 'perfect' in highschool but suddenly got one of the worst nerf ever recorded in history when u entered the univ

 

kaiyah

IT WAS COLES FAULT

 

adorenyaa

WHAT DID HE DOOO??

 

colesstones

i convinced him to do sumn

😋 mm yummy

 

adorenyaa

DO WHAT

ALSO WHATS WITH THE MM YUNMY??

 

kaiyah

its a boy thing 😁

 

colesstones

oh nothing yhe potato is yummy 😋

 

kaiyah

oh

 

colesstones

mhm

 

kaiyah

uhuh

 

adorenyaa

what ie this awkward couple moment

 

jayzaps

i didnt expect them to be this awkward

 

zanejulin

trust me, it gets worse than you thought

 

jayzaps

oh

what do u both talk about after sex... 😶

 

kaiyah

EXCUSE ME WHAT

 

colesstones

nithinf

we rarely talk HE JS WENT STRAIGHT TO SLEEP AFTER THAT

he sleeps like a dead person i swear

 

kaiyah

WHAT IDONT DO THAT I SHOWER FIRST

U SLEEO LIKE A ROCK

 

colesstones

yeah after showrr u went to the LIVING ROOM SND SLEEP THERE

AND AT LEAST I WAKE UP

 

kaiyah

ugh

at least i never snore 🙄

and im hot when i sleep and ur sofa is amazing

 

colesstones

womp wmop

thought u were a morning person or sumn

 

kaiyah

WDYM WOMP WOMP

I AM BUT LIKE YK UGH I CANT EXPLAIN IT ITS DIFFICULT TO EXPLAIN

YOU KNOW WHAT

I AM NEVER EVER GOINGTO SLEEP WITH COLE EEVR AGAIN 🙄

 

adorenyaa

uh

actually he is a morning person..

wait u guys sleep seperately??

I THOUGHT U BOTH ALWAYS SLEEP W EACH OTHET

 

kaiyah

see

TRUST THE PERSON WHO HAS BEEN LIVING EITH ME FOR 20 YEARS.

and nya dont question why

 

colesstones

I BELIEVE HER FORGIVE ME PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

ikr hes the one who said "im gonna sleep on the sofa" 🙄

im literally better than the fucking sofa

 

jayzaps

are we still gonna save kai from those crazy dogs

 

colesstones

oh right 😊

 

kaiyah

im not gonna stock my instant noodles at his place anymore

 

colesstones

HEY THATS UNFAIR

 

kaiyah

im going to take EVERY SINGLE SNACK IVE BOUGHT FOR HIM

 

colesstones

STOPPPO I ALREADY APOLOGIZED

 

kaiyah

ure so corny

 

colesstones

acting like ure not

 

kaiyah

wow

im taking the snacks

 

colesstones

IM SAVING UR ASS U SHOULD BE GRATEFUL

 

kaiyah

oh wow my sweet boyfriend is saving me wow! im so happy and grateful he's such a sweetheart.

 

adorenyaa

can i plan the wedding

 

skylor

CAN I BE THE FLOWER GIRL

 

pixxl

i can design and bake

 

jayzaps

WOW !!!!! im js gonna be the regular guest

 

kaiyah

whos wedding is this?? seems interesting

 

colesstones

🤦

 

kaiyah

what i was js asking

 

laloyd

THIS IS WHY IM ACCUSING HIM FOR SLEEPING WITH MR. ORETSEV.

 

kaiyah

ugh not this again

GUSY I EHAR DOAGS

fcuk

im gnna get the bike now

 

21 minutes later

kaiyah

*sends a video about him riding his bike while getting chased by dogs and told them that he accidentally fell and broke his left pedal making him can only pedal the othrr one*

 

adorenyaa

eow

we're coming

 

colesstones

uhh

im his superman what do i do

 

adorenyaa

stop texting and BIKE U STUPID ASSHOLE

 

colesstones

oh rgiht

 

12 minutes later

kaiyah

*sends a photo of their car withthe caption: "IM HERE. NO SIGN OF DOGS"

Notes:

guys this chapter is corny very corny i wrote this instead og sleeping🤭

Chapter 11: a rumour thats actually true

Summary:

The Ninjago City was shock, because of a rumour about the Master Of Fire & the Master Of Earth.

Notes:

in my hc the world doesnt know the ninja's real identities 💗

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

After patrolling in every inch and small corners of the city, they realized it's almost midnight and they haven't found anything so they decided to take a break.

They're resting on a nondescript building's roof, when they spot a group of goons a few blocks away.

Nya came closer to see clearly, Kai puts away the cigarette he was about to light. A shame really, not that he was hoping to relax. Cole and Jay was trying to listen to the goons's conversation.

"What're you guys doing?" Zane, with his intelligent voice spoke to Cole and Jay.

"Trying to listen? I'm cravin' for asses to kick ya know?" The ginger said.

Then Zane pulled out one of handy gadgets by Pixal, "let's listen to them with this."

And surprisingly, the gadget worked. They could perfectly pick up the muffled conversation the thugs are having below.

"Did y'all hear the rumours yet?" one whispers conspiratorially. Kai can just imagine him leaning in to the group, as if sharing a secret, and not a piece of news equivalent to an Instagram Story by Dareth. Hah, it's complicated.

"No, what rumours?"

"About the Master of Fire and the Master of Earth?" another questions.

"Yeah, those ones," says the first goon. "Apparently, they're goin' steady, if ya know what I mean."

"Wha? For real?"

"Knew they were a' bunch of pansies, all 'a them," an angry voice chimes in.

The rest of the group shushes him immediately.

"Shut the fuck up, Mitch, unless you wanna get yer ass torn to pieces."

"If the Master of Fire hears ya, he'll have you for a light fuckin' snack asshole, stop being cocky for once." Snaps the group leader. There's a hint of fear in his voice.

Jay burst out laughing, Cole stared at him unbelievably. While Kai saw Nya holding her laugh, sure, that conversation was funny, but it was also concerning. Turns out, the gangster side of Ninjago was afraid of the Master of Fire.

"They can't be serious by saying Kai would make them a light snack," Jay wheezed, he was almost out of breath. "I- I, I mean... what's so bad about Kai?"

Suddenly Jay winced, "fuckin' hell!" Kai 'accidently' burned Jay's suit, not as a whole, but only a little on his hand.

Jay wasn't amused, "Lloyd should be the one they're scared of, not that dickhead." He whispers to himself.

--

He gets a call at five in the morning. It wakes him up from a nice dream, and he groans in frustration.

"Hello?" he grumbles, half-asleep, far too lazy to check the caller ID.

"Cole, it's Kai. I have news."

Cole blinks, all thoughts of his awesome dreams and ridiculous hours of the morning fading fast. News never means, "Nya dumped Jay" or "Sensei kicked Jay's ass". News means one of them fucked up, last time the news was about Lloyd making Wu mad because he made a pre-made grave for Wu. And Cole isn't really fond of 'fucked up' news.

"What kind of news?"

"Nobody's died, or anything," Kai tried to calm the other man. It's not comforting however, "it's just kind of awkward."

Cole braces himself. He and Kai have varying definitions of awkward. Cole's laid back, but Kai doesn't let things go. He has a painstakingly-crafted reputation to uphold. (Talking about how the gangsters in Ninjago are afraid of him.)

"What kind of awkward?" Cole snaps.

"The bad kind of awkward." Kai's stalling. He doesn't want to spill, and with his big mouth, that's never a good sign.

"Well? What the fuck is it? Hurry up, I have shit to do."

He hears Kai's intake of breath, "Uh, so. Yesterday, we heard the awkward conversation. And now, the rumour is spreading all over the island. Even the island of the Keepers. IT'S EVERYWHERE!"

Oh, it's about that. "So?" Cole said calmly, not understanding what Cole is trying to say.

"Fuck you mean by so! We're fucked up, WE'RE LITERALLY THE NEW FACE OF GAY RIGHTS ASSHOLE!"

"Oh, right, you haven't come out yet," he chuckled, "do I have to help you?"

"Fuck you." And the call ended.

--

Kai's on patrol, making sure nothing goes wrong around his city. Suddenly, the Master of Earth lands next to him, silent and graceful, he nods.

"Red," Cole greets, fond. Kai's surprised he would show his face after this morning.

"Cole." It was obvious Kai was still pissed off by it, however, Cole was cool with it. Seeing Kai like this is somehow normal for him, it is normal for him.

Cole comes to stand next to Kai, leaning ever-so-slightly against his shoulder. the Brunette can feel his eyes scanning over the miles and miles of shining city from their vantage point. He feels momentarily like a watchful guardian, and not a menace. Cole brings that out in him.

"Any activity?" the older man asks. His voice is all business, but he's relaxed in a way Kai's only seen with the team. He clamps down on the sense of pride and happiness that brings him. Now is absolutely not the correct fucking time to get sappy.

"Nah, nothing serious, just a bunch of kids thinking they can buy drugs from my drug dealer."

Cole sighs. "It's peaceful isn't it?"

"If you're trying to talk about it, I will fucking crack every 15 knuckles on your hand."

"It's 14 knuckles by the way."

Kai rolls his eyes, "fuck you."

Cole couldn't help but scoff, "you wanna cool off a bit? Get some coffee?"

Now that's something Kai wouldn't deny, "fine. But no baby talking."

--

THE OG SIBLINGS

@adorenyaa, @kaiyah

fuck lloyd

adorenyaa

KAI WYA?!

 

kaiyah

coffee

 

adorenyaa

oh, im gussin ure havin a date

 

kaiyah

fuck no

 

adorenyaa

yknow ya should make friends wiith some gay peeps, so u could come out comfortably yknow

 

kaiyah

fucking hell, ion wanna be friends w those gay pricks their mehs and blahs are fuckinf annoying ass kind of shit

 

adorenyaa

not all of them r like that

 

kaiyah

whateveur, they even run gay-ly yknow

 

adorenyaa

LMAOOOO fine whatever u want

 

--

"Wanna crash at my place?" Cole offers.

Kai looked at him doing the 'are you fucking serious' face.

"What? You're my boyfriend, is it wrong for me inviting you to my place?"

"Shut up with your tittle-tattle," he lit up his cigarette, "guess it's not pretending anymore, huh?"

"We someday need to come out clean."

Kai took a drag from his cigarette and flicked ash to the side, "this rumour shit has some benefits to it,"

Yes, it does, if the thugs in this city were seriously scared of them both before, now, they might as well be terrified. Like, if they fuck with one of them, they would fuck with the other too. Clearly, yesterday the goons made a clear statement they're afraid of Kai, Cole thinks this is an alliance but with some more watertight.

--

the smiths

@adorenyaa,  @laloyd  @myass, @kaiyah,  @raiyah, @jayzaps

myass

@kaiyah are you really dating cole BROOKSTONE??

 

kaiyah

what the fuck, you guys told them??

 

myass

no son, nya or lloyd didnt tell us any single bit of information

its on the tv

 

jayzaps

DANGFFF

bro my bro-in-law is fuckin' famous

 

kaiyah

we were always famous jay

whats with your new TYPING??

you sound like a fuckin gangster

 

jayzaps

yeah right you talk like that faggot

 

kaiyah

shut the hell up you're acting like you havent fucked a man yet ass eater

 

jayzaps

cock eater

 

kaiyah

well guess what i eat both ass and cocks

 

adorenyaa

yea damn right you better shut up jay

 

jayzaps

WHAT WHY ARE U TEAMING UP WITH HIM

 

adorenyaa

because hes winning and ure losing and i dont like being in the losing team

 

jayzaps

UGH

 

@raiyah added @colesstones

 

kaiyah

DAD WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING

 

myass

we need to talk about marriage son, it's important for your future

 

kaiyah

WHAT

 

colesstones

finally i can use mom's ring

 

kaiyah

WHATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT.

 

laloyd

LMAOOAOAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA stop denying kai we know u wanted this

Notes:

ohmydays is this a fluff chapter.. HELP??

Chapter 12: bummer wrapped 2024

Summary:

the ninjas was very disappointed by their spotify wrapped 2024.

Notes:

hello im not dead, hope ya didn't miss me yet

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

alvin (kai) and the chipmunks (slaves)

@jayzaps,  @kaiyah,  @laloyd, @colesstones, @zanejulin

kaiyah

OH MY GOD VRO

it's like pdiddy entered my SPOTIFY ACCOUNT why is beyonce on my top 5 artist list!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

laloyd

BAHAH

i got bea, laufey, morgan freeman's son, and.. fucking jojo siwa

 

jayzaps

KARMA'S A BITCH!!

yea karma ISSSS  bitch, I HAVE FUCKING KSI

 

colesstones

i listend 200 minutes on spotify, what.

 

kaiyah

63,456 minutes here.. oh god i am actually chronically online.

 

zanejulin

i do not use spotify

 

jayzaps

oh right he uses apple music

 

colesstones

ah at least my artists are fine

suck on that losers

 

kaiyah

screw you youre not getting IT tonight

 

colesstones

i never got any IT anyways who cares

 

kaiyah

kys seriously cole kys

 

jayzaps

i have taylor swift on my list

 

kaiyah

thats not a flex unfortunately

 

jayzaps

help, im still at the restaurant

 

colesstones

true true

hey whys spotify wrapped so shit this year

 

kaiyah

elon musk is right

AI is everywhere and dangerous

i fw those AI tiktok cat dancing videos though, very entertaining

 

jayzaps

meow meow meow meeoooowww

 

kaiyah

im surprised i read that in the same tone

 

laloyd

musically gifted, they said

 

kaiyah

nice joke

 

zanejulin

hey i have 3 minutes on spotify!

 

kaiyah

seriously, what song did you listen to..

 

laloyd

the 3 minute song

 

colesstones

i think garmadon is typing, no way lloyd knows dad jokes

 

laloyd

ive grown!

 

kaiyah

yea i agree with u cole

 

jayzaps

hey guys nya just dm'ed me saying she got kai's poop song as her top 1 song

 

kaiyah

fantastic news, jay!

 

colesstones

hah knew those songs were bangers

 

kaiyah

fame

 

colesstones

HAHA

 

silly vigilantes

@adorenyaa, @laloyd, @kaiyah, @colesstones, @jayzaps, @zanejulin, @pixxl, @skylore

adorenyaa

im gonna SUE the spotify company

 

laloyd

throw a democracy instead lets go

 

pixxl

dont think its a great idea

 

kaiyah

who cares

 

zanejulin

i do

 

pixxl

i do

 

kaiyah

right

AI.

 

adorenyaa

kai thats rude

 

pixxl

we're not Artificial Intelligence

 

kaiyah

bite m

 

colesstones

sure

 

kaiyah

ugh

 

skylore

ok guys! ive brought torch and oil lets go!!

 

kaiyah

for what

you got a flamin' hot guy right here sweetheart

 

skylore

wtf ew

 

colesstones

i swear we're married

Notes:

yes thats it im sorry