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The two boys sit cross-legged on the carpeted floor of Hyunjin's bedroom. A pink, heart shaped cake sit between the two. Written in fancy letters on the top say Happy Bday Hyunjin. Strawberries lined the base, and a creamy white frosting piped around the top.
"Waah Felix this is so cool, did you make it yourself?" Hyunjin questioned, visibly amazed by the details put into the small cake. Felix timidly nods at the compliment, his freckled face flustered from embarrassment. However, nerves still washed through Felix. What if he messed had messed up the baking time? Or what if the cake was too rich to eat? He wanted Hyunjin to be able to enjoy it. Any mistake would shatter Felix's fragile heart into pieces.
Felix bites his bottom lip. Another wave of anxiety rushed through his body. Would bringing his personal beliefs into Hyunjin's birthday be too much? Felix saying grace for his hyung was all with good intentions. He wants the best for Hyunjin. Even God knows Felix would be gone without him.
"Hyung, is it okay if I say grace?" He anxiously asks. Hyunjin nods and Felix bows his head in prayer.
Hyunjin had known Felix was Christian. His family would be gone early Sunday mornings and return around lunch time. Felix and his father would be wearing suits while his sisters and mother would be wearing elegant yet casual dresses. When at the younger's house they would always say grace at meal times, and when at Hyunjin's he'd offer to say grace at dinner time. Hyunjin's parents thought it was cute how Felix showed appreciation for the meal through the few sentences he'd say before they ate.
"We thank the blessed hands whom lovingly prepared this bountiful meal." Felix would always say. He'd encourage everyone to hold hand in hand as he spoke. Felix's hands were always so soft. Hyunjin wished he could hold them forever.
Hyunjin looks up through his bangs at Felix and stares lovingly as the younger begins grace. Felix's head is bowed and his eyes closed. His slender fingers intertwined. His small cross pendant was between his hands, the chain draped from his palms to his slim neck. The connection Felix has with his God was admirable. How easily he could confide in himself by asking God for advice and blessings.
"Heavenly Father, I thank You for the life of Hyunjin today. May You continue to bless, guide, and give him wisdom and peace throughout the year. His existence is a gift to us, and I thank the LORD for His grace and mercies upon him. I pray that You’ll bless the food on our table, fill us with Your joy as we eat, and share memories and laughter today in Jesus’ name. Amen." Felix slowly raises his head and shyly smiles and the elder. "Shall we eat now Hyung?"
"Of course, I can't wait to try it. You put so much love into it Lix." Hyunjin picks up the knife from the plate a starts cutting a small slice for Felix. As he cut the slice, the younger began to quietly sing. Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dear Hyunjin, happy birthday to you.
The knife slices easily through the cake and a small echo rings through the bedroom as the knife hits the bottom of the plate. Felix's small hands reach towards the knife and he sets it down next to the cake. His hands shake as he leans towards elder, his eyes closed as his plump lips meet Hyunjin's. Hyunjin melts into the kiss and pulls Felix in deeper. The younger's heart begins to beat faster as the kiss continued, Hyunjin could feel it where their chests were sandwiched together.
"I'm so sorry Hyunjin, we're both going to go to Hell.." Felix whimpers, his head resting on Hyunjin's chest. "It's all my fault." His small body racked with shudders as he cried silently. Only thing in the room that could be heard was Felix's labored breathing.
"Felix, you're not going to Hell, look at me." Hyunjin whispers as Felix's gaze shifts up. Hyunjin places his hands on the back of the younger's head, his thumbs resting under Felix's chin. Hyunjin pulls him into another kiss, Felix's tears running down both their faces adding a salty taste to the kiss. His best friend's lips on his, the warmth from Hyunjin's hands radiating into his skin and their breaths intertwining. Hyunjin gently rubs circles into the younger's back, a small attempt to calm his nerves.
"God loves all, doesn't He? He wouldn't send us to Hell for kissing." Hyunjin began, still rubbing the younger's back. "God loves all of His children. You are not an exception Felix." The younger's breathing slowed steadily. Felix's small whimpers still echoed around the room. "Do you want me to try the cake now Lix?"
He nods into Hyunjin's chest then slowly pulls away. Slowly, Hyunjin reached for a spoon and grasped it gently. He takes a small bite, the chocolate melting into his tongue.
Felix's face lit up when Hyunjin took his first bite, his slender arms close to his chest in both anticipation and excitement. His plump, rosy cheeks, and full lips were pulled back into a gorgeous smile. Felix could easily light up the whole world if he wanted to, which he definitely did. He was an angel. How could he even think he'd go to Hell? The strength in the boy's beliefs had unintentionally struck fear into him.
Felix picks up a spoon from the plate the was sat upon. Scooping a small piece of cake into Hyunjin's mouth before taking a spoonful into his own. Hyunjin giggles and leans in to kiss the smaller's plump lips.
"You had frosting on your face Lix.
They both giggled. The younger feels himself relax, the warmth from the kiss, the older's hands and the sweet cake causing him to feel safe and sheltered. Hyunjin was right. God was love and love was all that mattered in this moment.
