Chapter Text
The big boss of hell himself sighed as he sat at the putrid hotel bar…he really wasn't a fan of it and didn't understand why they'd have a bar in a hotel made for redemption but alas, that didn't really matter, he wasn't going to critic what he was here to support.
He'd been coming around seldom throughout the month, trying to be more supportive of Charlie's endeavours but also trying to be moral support as she was freaking out about the upcoming extermination. He honestly was a bit nervous as well but he tried to keep his cool! He needed to! He was THE Lucifer, Adam didn't scare him, that dude couldn't keep a woman to save his life.
“Didn't expect to see Lucifer at the bar.” Husk stated as he walked up behind the counter, beginning to clean a glass.
“Do you expect anybody at the bar at eight in the morning?” Lucifer replied, setting his head on his propped up hand, elbow resting on the wooden counter.
“You wanna drink something or just water?” The tophat wearing cat asked…Lucifer thought he looked really goofy, what an odd looking cat.
The king of hell was smiling like an idiot at Husk, staring at him whilst the other looked back, expecting an answer.
…
…
…
“Hello?”
“Oh yeah! I'll have uh— wine?” He raised a brow, unsure of what to really ask for— I mean, this was a bar, he just HAD to honour that! Ordering something like a hot chocolate would be pretty sad, not that Husk knew how to make one.
“Wine?” Husk raised a brow, not too convinced that this guy actually wanted wine at EIGHT in the morning.
“Yeah, wine? Jesus gifted it to us, might as well.” He chuckled, giving a light shrug to the unimpressed cat.
“Water or wine, easy choice, I'm not Jesus, I don't know this shit.” Husk huffed placing the clean glass in front of Lucifer, looking at him impatiently.
“Uh. Wine?”
“Water it is!” Husk announced, grabbing a cold bottle and filling up the glass. Even if Lucifer did want wine, he wasn't about to deal with Charlie's dad being wine drunk before lunch.
“Why— I asked for— ugh, never mind.” Lucifer huffed, taking a hold of the glass almost in a depressed way. Poor man didn't get his wine, this cat really didn't serve him wine.
“It's eight a.m. buddy. Maybe with whatever you get for your lunch, I'll get you some of that wine but for now, just relax. Charlie's usually up at eight fifteen.”
“Didn't think her staff would police my drinking—”
“It is what it is, I've got my policies, I'm the bartender.” He had a smug smile on his face, staring back at the mildly upset Lucifer with his hands on his hips.
“Well…actually, it's not mine, Charlie asked me to implement it but since it is my bar, so, my policy in the end.” Husk added before focusing on a special someone that walked up to the bar.
“What are you looking at?” Lucifer looked behind him, almost jumping off his chair when he saw the radio demon towering behind him.
“I didn't know the king was this easy to scare.” Alastor said with that usual shit eating grin that Lucifer could not stand it, HE WANTED TO RIP OUT ALL HIS TEETH—
“Hahaha…I mean, if you walk up to someone like a ghost, it's pretty surprising.” He rolled his eyes, turning back to face that eagle-cat looking bartender.
“Black coffee?” Husk asked Alastor, already preparing the cup.
“I'd thoroughly enjoy that, yes.” He set his mic down against the counter, sitting a seat apart from that blonde looking clown. He glanced at him, not commenting, focusing on Husk, making his coffee.
“So…” Lucifer tapped his fingers lightly against the wood, feeling pretty awkward in the silence. “Have you seen Charlie?”
“No.”
“Ah…well, It's eight twenty now, I'd expect her to be down here by now, right…uh…Hisk?”
Husk scoffed, shaking his head lightly with an amused grin on his face. He then threw a spoon into the cup and handed it to Alastor.
Husk looked at the two, from the radio demon to the fallen angel…Jesus the stupid tension going on between them was humorous, all because that strawberry pimp thought it'd be funny to fuck with the princesses dad.
Alastor being like a father to Charlie was a complete joke, those two probably exchange the average of five sentences to each other every week. He knew Al was just saying some bullshit to set off Lucifer but the funniest part was that Charlie seemed to have believed whatever that deer said.
That girl really had issues.
“Hi everyone! I didn't expect you all to be here so early!” Charlie ran down the stairs and to the bar, excited. Meanwhile, Vaggie was absolutely out of it, sighing as she followed after her girlfriend.
“Dad, you're finally making friends?”
What kind of question was that, he had plenty of friends! There was…uhm…his ducks.
“Yeah, those two are inseparable.” Husk stated sarcastically, gaining a confused look from both.
“No, uh—” Lucifer shook his hand in a negative way but was cut off.
“I'm glad you two are finally getting along.” Charlie clasped her hands together, Vaggie arriving and resting a hand on her shoulder.
“We've always gotten along!” Alastor chimed in, the static around his voice seemingly louder, Husk could clearly tell that the guy was being sarcastic but Lucifer and Charlie seemed to take it literally. He now knew where the blonde got that gullible personality from.
This was just too easy for Alastor, he could say pigs fly and they'd believe him. But then again, this is hell, it wouldn't be far-fetched to see that.
“Really?” Vaggie scoffed, seemingly not believing it as it was obvious sarcasm.
“Aw, you guys.” Charlie smiled.
Lucifer smiled awkwardly, questioning everything that's happened with them both. Was Alastor joking with him and he really took it to heart? He had a friend?
“Let's get lunch together!” He exclaimed, seeing Charlie expectantly looking at Alastor who's smile looked even more forced than usual.
“Why not?” The radio demon cocked his head, glaring at Husk as he heard him laugh like an idiot but letting it go, deciding to just enjoy his coffee, the only thing he'd seemingly be enjoying today.
What a joke. Lunch with Lucifer, he already had to support his presence but he didn't think he'd had to deal with him at lunch.
Whatever, if this interaction meant Charlie would stop giving him pep talks on why he should give a friendship with her father a chance, he'd suffer through it to limit the future annoying behaviour he'd possibly have to deal with.
“I didn't actually expect you to agree…” Lucifer chuckled awkwardly, adjusting his hat.
“I have a great place in mind if you'll leave me the choice.” Alastor shared with an almost persuasive tone that left Lucifer even more nervous than before, he did not feel good about this but he couldn't turn back, could he? Charlie would be sad.
“Yeah, sure, I…uh…trust you?”
“Uh huh.” Husker snickered at the two as he left the counter. “You have fun with that.”
“We'll have loads!” Lucifer basically yelled at him, trying to appear confident but just confusing everyone who went silent, staring at him.
“Not in a weird way—”
“I doubt it can get weirder than this.” Vaggie scoffed then held her girlfriend's hand, lightly pulling at it. “We gotta go wake up Angel and Sir Pentious. Let's leave those two to their friendship.” She chuckled lightly, hearing the disapproval of Alastor just by that light radio static, he was clearly more than a bit bothered.
“Right! You two have fun.” Charlie said encouragingly, cheering them on but of course not without a warning. “Don't do anything dumb, no fighting or musical duets!”
“Of course not, Charchar.” Lucifer forced a pleasant smile, watching as the duo left them to their own devices.
“What's this game you're playing?” Alastor interjected, clearly not on board with the whole friendship they had going on.
“Games? I don't see uno on this table.”
“What is that?” Alastor raised a brow, reaching for his microphone, holding it in one hand and holding his coffee filled cup with the other.
“I'm older than you, than everyone, yet I'm the one who knows this and not you?” He honestly didn't try to sound mocking but this was just impressively dumb to him.
“That does not explain my question.”
“It's a card game where the point is to run out of cards first I'm pretty sure.”
“Wouldn't that be flawed?” Alastor questioned. “Whoever began the game first would obviously win.”
“No, I mean, there's like cards to make people skip their turn, there's like four different colours and you gotta match them if you wanna play your cards, it's a whole thing.”
“Ah, well that does sound like a more playable game now.” The radio demon set down his now empty cup of coffee on the wooden counter. “But that was not what I meant when I was referring to games.”
“What then? I don't really play those technology ones.”
“...” He honestly didn't know if this guy was being serious or just playing with him but was getting annoyed either way. “Why did you insist on us grabbing lunch?”
“I didn't insist, I just proposed, you accepted- and~ Charlie's happy.” Lucifer looked very smug when he replied that.
“If this is about Charlie, we could simply pretend we went to lunch together, I do not feel like using my time for a meaningless outing.” Alastor stood up.
“Oh, come on, Alice, you know Charlie would know if we lied, plus, I don't want to lie to her.” He furrowed his brows. “We at least have to try to have lunch once and talk, maybe we'll find out we actually don't hate each other that much!” He tried to be positive about it, he had to be for Charlie!
“I doubt it.”
Well that killed his positivity really quick.
“But I suppose we could.”
“Hell yeah!” Victory for the Morningstars, who's the best dad? That's right, it's Luci!
“By the way, I know your IQ is unsurprisingly lower than your height but please do remember my name, otherwise it'll be off to a rather unenthusiastic start.”
Lucifer's vibe was once again killed, giving the overlord an irritated look before replying. “Of course, Al-as-tor.” He made sure to enunciate every syllable in the most annoying way.
“Wonderful, I'll see you at lunch, meet me in cannibal town at eleven forty-five.” Alastor ordered, beginning to head off but quickly being stopped in his tracks.
“Absolutely not, we're gonna go to a nice place that's not cannibalistic, a vegetarian place! Hah!”
“Sure.” He could not find the motivation to insist, he already didn't want to deal with that man which meant in no circumstances he was going to argue about where to eat with that man.
Although the radio demon had hoped to at least enjoy the food he'd be eating, he'd have to cross that off the short list of what he could enjoy on this outing.
“I didn't expect you to agree so quickly.” Lucifer retorted, almost disappointed.
“Do you purposefully attempt to irritate me?” Alastor gave an unimpressed chuckle. “That's cute of you.” The mocking tone was clearly present.
“Aw, you think I'm cute?” Lucifer chuckled, taking a hold of his cane and poking the overlords shoulder.
“No. See you later.” His ears lowered, a concerned look in his eyes with his unmoving smile accompanying the glare.
And with that, the deer headed out of the hotel but that left Lucifer wondering…
“I didn't tell him where we'd eat, how's he…” Nevermind, this dude had powers, he figured he'd find him wherever he went. Or, well, he hoped to not get stood up; even if he did, it'd simply just give him a nice lunch outing on his own but it probably still will hurt his feelings.
____________________________________
With much confusion, Alastor found himself in a garden, a nice looking one at that. It didn't exactly look like a restaurant though.
He'd randomly been teleported here and he had quickly figured it'd been Lucifers doing as it was noon sharp and time for their lunch. Also, he doubted anyone would be able to teleport him out of nowhere that easily apart from him, the ruler of hell.
“Al, right on time!” The king's voice came from behind the overlord, causing him to turn and look down at the blonde.
“You were rather excited to see me, I see.” Alastor was very much annoyed but he shouldn't have expected anything less from him.
“Well, yes, I like lunch and I'm happy to not spend it alone, why wouldn't I be happy?” Lucifer tilted his head with a very annoying smile, Alastor found it to be a taunting one.
“So this is what that is now? Company?” Alastor chuckled, beginning to slowly walk past Lucifer who then followed him as they continued to speak.
“Well, no, also for Charlie.”
“You truly want this friendship to exist don't you?”
“Doesn't have to be friendship.” Lucifer muttered, a sharp radio static hurting his ears, glaring at Alastor.
“ What did you say ?”
“We could just be acquaintances that don't hate each other.” Lucifer huffed, not understanding this attitude coming from the deer, so sensitive.
“I would prefer that.” The static suddenly stopped as he realised he'd misunderstood. Lucifer was not Vox, he had to remember that Charlie's father was not as weird as that flat-screen TV.
“Right, so, let's try to have a nice time!” Lucifer smiled widely, it was very much forced as he was getting impatient with the others unwillingness to try and get along but at least he hadn't left.
At the end of the day, this wasn't for them but for Charlie, at least that's what Lucifer had in mind.
“So, this was supposed to be lunch, wasn't it? I don't see much food around here.” Alastor commented, taking another look around to confirm his statement.
“Well, I thought it'd be nicer to hang around here since we didn't seem to agree on the food choice.” He replied.
“Well.” Alastor's smile became a little less brighter. “I suppose that is reasonable but I was quite hungry, what a shame.”
Lucifer didn't exactly see himself as the type to bend over backwards for anyone, let alone some guy he truly didn't appreciate but then again, he went through all this trouble to succeed in getting somewhat friendly with this fellow…again, all for his daughter.
He saw nothing special in the demon, he was cocky, overly confident with no one to humble him which Lucifer would have gladly done but then again…Charlie.
“Haha…” Lucifer forced out an annoyed scoff that had been an attempt at sounding amused. “Well, I hope you like apples.”
“Apples?” Alastor seemed intrigued, apples offered by Lucifer himself, how ironic was it, something told him not to trust it but what could these apples really hold, knowledge? That had already been done.
“I'd appreciate it.” He added, looking at the shorter man, a big smile on full display.
“You're not wary of it?” Lucifer had asked as the two approached a tree. Normally most would question any apple around here, especially if it was offered by him, not that he'd offered many apples he barely had been going out as of recent years but Alastor didn't seem phased about it at all.
It was rather amusing to the king, he had a small feeling that it had been intentional, this radio demon very much seemed like a control freak, even if he were wary, he'd never let that show and refusing him an apple could only mean being wary, right?
“Here-” Lucifer reached for one but was caught in his movement, the taller demon easily snatching the fruit off the tree.
“Hm…not the prettiest piece of fruit I've seen but very much a higher quality to what is usually sold.” Alastor said, inspecting the apple before it was taken away from him.
A sharp radio distortion coming out of his mic as Lucifer did so, glaring at the demon. “Could you stop doing that? You're gonna give me tinnitus.”
“I'm afraid that isn't an option.” Alastor's ear twitched alongside the questioning look his eyes gave to the other. Alastor clearly did not understand why Lucifer had taken the apple away from him but he could only guess, all those guesses seemed almost paranoid and Alastor did not like to stress himself like that, brushing it off.
“Uh-huh.” Lucifer held the apple with both his hands before a yellowish glow surrounded them, the apple suddenly becoming a much more gorgeous plump red.
It was probably the prettiest apple Alastor had seen in decades, scoffing at the display, finally taking the apple back, out of the other's hands, holding it up for him to see it more closely.
“Is this what you did the first time? Make it appealing?” For what had seemed like forever, Alastor had genuinely become a little concerned, specifically about what he'd done to it.
“I guess, yeah, they taste better that way if you ask me.” He shot back very nonchalantly.
“Mhm.” He glanced at Lucifer then took the apple up to his mouth, biting into it, deciding to not question it further. He doubted Lucifer would poison the guy his daughter wanted him to befriend.
Lucifer had definitely not expected the little hesitance. This only confirmed his theory about the overlord. He didn't seem like the type to show he was worried about anything, clinging on to his confidence and pride.
“I think I've figured you out mister deer.” Lucifer grinned, watching Alastor chew what he'd bitten off the fruit.
“Oh, have you?”
“Pride!”
“Well, it is where we are.” The stag shrugged, taking another bite of the apple.
“You're so irritating, I can't even hate it anymore.” Mission failed successfully?
“That was what Charlie wanted you to do wasn't it? Though I'm afraid I'm not exactly over my dislike for you quite yet, I'm still pondering my thoughts and judgments.”
“I figured. I don't mind continuing this little date.” Lucifer smiled before spinning on his heel, leading the way towards a part of the garden they'd yet to explore.
“This what, now?” A low distortion sound came along with his filtered voice, sounding rather agitated.
“Dates aren't always romantic, dirty mind.” Lucifer teased, irritating Alastor was the goal and everything he struck, he'd seemed to have marked. Now, how long he could keep the game going was the real question.
“Mhm.” Much less talkative, the overlord had nothing to reply with, seemingly speechless for the first time during this outing. Not very amused by all this, he began to think of opportunities of when he could leave.
This little interaction had gone on for quite some time and Charlie would surely be pleased, there'd be no need to drag this out much longer.
“I do wonder, mister radio demon.” He slightly turned his head to look at the other. “Why not switch to TV? You'd make a great show host with that little attitude of yours, they always love the 1930s aesthetic on TV these days.”
“I don't find picture shows to be my medium, leaving no room for the imagination kills one's spirit.” He explained. “Plus, keeping radio going is important as I do have quite the audience.” Alastor remarked, holding his half eaten apple, glancing at it then back at Lucifer.
“I find that most who watch TV seem to have rotting imaginations, they don't have to work their minds when everything is presented to them so easily. Then again, I do enjoy theatre, real time acting is exciting but what makes me dislike the recorded kind is the fact that it'll always be the same performance if you watch it twice whilst a play has quite the variation, you can't always reproduce the exact same thing in real time.”
Lucifer had found himself quite intrigued by Alastor's explanation, it was quite the thought out reply, something he hadn't expected as he just thought it'd be something as simple as ‘I hate TV because I'm the radio demon.’ but he made quite the point.
“You know what, you're right, TV really does rot the brain.” He nodded. “I watch it from time to time, and have rarely found shows I enjoy, I'm more of an arts and crafts kinda guy if you catch my drift.” He did the little finger gun at Alastor, giving him a wink but quickly stopped when the other just stared back coldly.
“Arts and crafts? I didn't think you'd have time for that.”
“Well…I'm a lot less busy than I claim to be, honestly. I mostly just make things at home when I have time, which is pretty often.”
“Ah, yes? What is it that you create?” Alastor cocked his head to the side.
“Would it be ironic if I asked you to not laugh at me?”
“Quite.”
“Well, I make rubber ducks that can do different things…” He looked at Alastor, expecting some sort of mocking reaction but surprisingly not, Alastor simply nodded before speaking again.
“And what can they do?”
“You really care to know?” Lucifer's eyes sparkled with excitement, no one ever cared before— he didn't really have anyone to talk to about it or show them off to.
“I suppose.” Alastor shrugged.
“Okay! Well! The latest one I made can do backflips and it spits fire, you wanna see it!?” He was so enthusiastic as he spoke about it, Alastor almost appeared surprised by his passionate switch in attitude.
“Sure, that could be quite entertaining.”
And with the simple snap of two fingers, the rubber duck appeared in Lucifer's hand, promptly doing two backflips in a row. Lucifer then aimed the duck farther away from them, holding it out forward.
Alastor raised a brow, letting out a light chuckle when the toy spit quite the amount of fire. “That was quite the amusing show, I have to admit.”
“And I have others! I got this other one that can walk around— it does fall over easily but if it's like across a desk, it easily makes it the whole way!”
“Fascinating.” Alastor's tone was quite flat but not entirely cold, he was listening to Lucifer and did find this to be rather entertaining.
“I know right?” Lucifer replied, almost exhausted at how much he'd spoken, catching his breath. “You got any passions outside of radio?”
“Well, let me think about it…” Alastor looked up for a moment then back down at the king. “I cook, does that qualify?”
“Yeah, I mean, you can make a lot of recipes, that sounds easier to work with honestly. I've made so many ducks that I can't come up with new ability combinations anymore.” He looked very dissatisfied when he said this.
“I'm sure you'll figure it out, you've got plenty of time on your hands, that's what you said, wasn't it?” Alastor cracked a wider smile, it would've almost been comforting to Lucifer if it wasn't for the fact that the deer looked so damn creepy.
“Right, yeah.” He chuckled awkwardly, unsure of where to take the conversation now.
“This was a surprisingly nice conversation we've just had—”
“—You liked the ducks?”
“It was rather quite the fun little amusement.” Alastor chuckled, Lucifer's obsession really was something to witness. “But what I was trying to say was that I believe you maybe aren't as irritating as I first thought.”
“Is that supposed to be a compliment?”
“Maybe, more or less. I believe this would make Charlie happy, that we had a good conversation.”
“Oh, right, I forgot about that.” After thinking so much about it, it'd slipped his mind— mostly because of the duck talk but that wasn't important right now. “I guess it would make her happy.”
“Well then, I shall take my leave if this is it.” The radio demon announced, being met with a reaction that surprised him.
“Already?” The blonde sighed. “Well, it has been about an hour.”
“Right.” He nodded.
“So, you're leaving?”
“I'll see you around.” And with that, Alastor faded away, leaving Lucifer to think alone, having very conflicting views of him.
On one hand, he was a cocky asshole who had way too much of an ego and needed much humbling, on the other, he ended up being nice to talk with and Lucifer shockingly warmed up to the guy, though he wasn't sure what opinion of him Alastor had.
He did seem less annoyed by the time he'd left but Lucifer really couldn't be bothered to try and read through a smiling idiot deer's actions.
But he did look forward to telling Charlie this update, she'd surely be very content with him and that meant they'd talk more…or something.
He wasn't sure, a soft sigh escaping him as he made his way through the large garden. It'd been one he, Charlie and Lilith spent time in often during his daughters youth, they'd even gotten a painting done of them there, he really cherished those memories.
And now he could add one more thing to that pile of good memories: making friends with that radio demon and talking about his ducks! Oh, and that meaning Charlie would be happy.
He was happy about that.