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To Kei, who observes his surroundings like it's second nature, Tobio is an interesting one to observe. From an arrogant 'King' struggling to find his rightful throne, to a teammate he undeniably respect and trust, and to someone he couldn't take his eyes off. Before he knew it, there are a few little things about Tobio he kept neatly in his mind.
First of all, Tobio's hair smells like shampoo.
Okay, to his defence, it was when they went home from the interhigh in their second year where the wind blowed rather hard outside. It blowed everyone's hair, including Tobio's who was standing beside him. Despite it being after a match, Tobio's hair smelled nicely. Kei knows. It's from a series of a popular brand that smells subtly like fresh lemon. It's on the actually-smells-good-shampoo list Kei had kept in his mind. Good taste, Kei never thought Tobio has that. But considering his sister is a hair and makeup artist, it's not impossible. Day after day though, it's weird how Tobio's hair always smells like it, even after a long practice match of endless rallies full of sweat. He must have been very dilligent with his showers, Kei had thought.
Tobio grew taller and taller in their 3rd year, in contrast of his hair.
He had cut it so short, now above his ears and without bangs. Kei thinks maybe it's the same length as his own hair when he first joined Karasuno. Kei's hair now is on the much longer side, almost reaching his ears and would sometimes covers his eyes. Tobio babbles about that, how it could disturb his vision of the court and the ball and possibly dangers him (and the team's play) and how he should've cut it short just like Tobio. Deep down though, Kei knows how Tobio is sometimes shy about his own hair because he has never exposed his face that much, and how Tobio would sometimes play with the ends of his hair, tugging at it as if making it stretch to be longer. Kei thinks that this hairstyle showcases Tobio's features better, and it is nowhere near bad at all. Tobio is handsome, as much as Kei hate to admit it.
Tobio's height still hasn't reached Kei's.
The dark-haired boy mulls about it ever so often. Kei notices how he stares at him whenever they're doing physical check-ups, and how Tobio would tip toe a little when they're standing side-by-side. Kei would snicker whenever he does that, and Tobio would give him a set of pout and frown in return. Tobio doesn't have to know that Kei actually snickered out of fondness.
Tobio's lips are often formed into a pout.
It's an ongoing habit Tobio has from when they first met, Kei had noticed it from back then. But now, he finds himself staring at it a little bit too long whenever Tobio does that. Kei would have to mentally smack himself to direct his gaze away. Luckily, it seems that Tobio hasn't noticed it yet. He's dense like that, and it works in Kei's favor.
Tobio's hands are soft.
It must be from the routine he always does to keep his hands in prime condition. Kei knows how it feels from when Tobio was teaching him how to set, and since he isn't good with words and was too impatient, he decided to just take Kei's arms and demonstrate the position of the hands Kei should've done by moving it around. Kei isn't one to like to being touched, he prefers to avoid it, but Tobio's slender fingers was cold to the touch, and it was a nice feeling after a hard and hot practice. They ended up setting hand-in-hand, with Tobio's palms inside of Kei's, and Kei doesn't avoid it at all. He doesn't hate it in the slightest.
Tobio is popular with girls in their third year.
Well, he has always been popular, but it seems that his popularity skyrocketed after their tournaments in the first year. Girls from whatever classes would sometimes (not so) casually pass through the gym where they practice to have a peek at him, either greet him or squeals, then run away with blushing red cheeks. There was one time, the Valentine's day, where he came to the club room with two hands full of bags of chocolates he received that day. Hinata made fun of him, Yamaguchi seemed invested, and their juniors looked at him with eyes full of awe. Only Kei that didn't gave him any reaction.
Kei wondered about it too. It has never bothered him how Tobio is popular with girls, or how there would be girls popping in the gym just to see him, or how he received Valentine's day chocolates probably more than Kei. But now, he finds himself staring at Tobio talking to a group of girls outside the gym, where they have taken him away before their practice starts. Kei stays inside, watching with something stirring up inside his stomach. A weird feeling. A hateful feeling.
"You'll bore a hole into his head if you keep glaring at him like that, you know." Yamaguchi's voice besides him startled him. Kei had to maintain his composure. He must've stared too long that Yamaguchi ended up noticing.
"I wasn't glaring," a pathetic attempt to refute, Kei knows.
"Mmhm, sure you weren't," Yamaguchi replied playfully. Damn it, his inner frown must've been too strong it showed on the outside too. Kei couldn't help it.
"Don't you have a crush on him, Tsukki?" Yamaguchi threw the question so lightly that Kei has to let out a gasp and looks around to make sure that no one, especially a flock of messy orange hair, heard it. He then turns to Yamaguchi, who stares back at him waiting for an answer. At times like this he gets a bit scared of Yamaguchi's percieveness.
"I- no, I don't." Yamaguchi tilted his head and raised his eyebrows in return, not believing Kei's answer. A minute of silence and stare down passed and Kei finally surrenders. He lets out a sigh, "Fine, maybe I do."
Yamaguchi grinned, excitedly, as if he had been waiting to, and Kei immediately regrets acknowledging his feelings.
"Well, that's nice!" Yamaguchi says, as he patted, or more like hit Kei's back. "I'll support you all the way, Tsukki."
"It's not like I'd do anything about it," Kei replied.
Yamaguchi frowns. "Why not?"
Kei didn't answer. Instead, he looks at Tobio who now looks troubled and tired in keeping up with the girls surrounding him. Just then, Tobio lifted his head and find Kei's eyes looking at him. They stare at each other in silence, before Tobio breaks the eye contact to look down and continue his talk with the girls.
"I want to keep him as he is," was Kei's answer. Yamaguchi looked at him in confusion, and Kei himself doesn't actually know what he fully meant by that, but Tobio is in the middle of making his way to the gym, finally breaking himself free from the flock of girls. They had to stop with the conversation of having crushes at the dark-haired boy who is now walking towards where Kei and Yamaguchi were standing, and Kei felt relieved. For one and many other reasons.
"Must be tiring being so popular, huh, King." That sentence came out so naturally from Kei's mouth when Tobio arrived, as if he hadn't been looking at the boy with undescribable feelings and basically admitting his crush on said boy.
Tobio didn't answer immediately. Instead, he stares at Kei and Kei notices the tip of his ears were red. Something swells again in his stomach.
"Shut up," Tobio finally opens his mouth as he walked pass Kei and Yamaguchi to join Hinata in the solo grind he has been doing at the back. Yamaguchi looked at Kei as if he's a dad looking disappointedly at his son, before leaving Kei to join the other two. Kei follows them with his eyes, his gaze landing on a particular dark-colored short hair now moving actively in the court, with a passionate glint in his eyes and a big dumb grin Kei has memorized in the back of his mind whenever he watches Tobio play. That volleyball idiot.
Kei does want to keep Tobio as he is. He is content just watching him from afar.
Days pass by, and before they knew it, high school was over and everyone has already turned into adults with their own jobs and futures ahead. Tobio was off for the olympics. Kei, along with university and part-time jobs, decided to play for the 2nd division team. So much for 'just a club'.
Well, maybe he misses a certain dark-haired setter from his club back in high school. A bit.
That's why, when he received the news about the match between MSBY Black Jackals and Schweiden Adlers, the teams that his close friends played for, it stirs up quite a ruckus not only in the Karasuno group chat but also inside his stomach.
Kei was not prepared, even until he sits inside the gymnasium with Yamaguchi and Yachi. Amongst the roar of the audience and the heated atmosphere of anticipation, he can also feel the roar inside his head and his chest heating up in anticipation, questions, and worry.
How is Tobio now?
What face should he put on when he shows up?
Is he still the same Tobio, with all the little things Kei kept neatly in his mind?
Or has he changed?
Kei can't help but let his thoughts wonder.
The light flashes on, illuminating the players who had just stepped into the court. The commentator announces each player's names from both teams, but Kei wasn't hearing all that. His eyes are immediately locked on a dark hair, now with bangs parted in the middle, slightly taller and notably broader figure, standing in all his glory wearing the white Adlers uniform. There he is. 21 year old Kageyama Tobio in the flesh.
The first thing Kei notices, watching a grown up Tobio play, is that he's still the same.
The strong yet subtle passion radiating from his body. The glint in his eyes as he throw the ball for his service ace, now even stronger and polished. His ever so flawless set, now casted to even higher players. The grin in his face as the game advances, no matter how tiring it looked like. Excited and anticipating. Always pushing for his spiker's best. His absolute love for volleyball shining through. The volleyball idiot.
Tobio hasn't changed. And Kei couldn't feel any more relieved than this. He watched the rest of the game just as heated as the players on the court, with a great sense of longing and pride, cheering his friends with all of his heart.
Well, when the game ended and the Karasuno team gathered for a hyper reunion, Kei does notice the slight changes in a grown up Tobio.
As mentioned earlier, his hair. It seems Tobio grew out his hair again, but this time parts the bangs in the middle. It's nice, Kei thought. Any hairstyle suits him. He's still as handsome, even more handsome now. It's a bit embarassing how Kei couldn't take his eyes off him.
What caught Kei off guard though, is how Tobio's hair still smelled of the shampoo he used back in highschool. When they were posing for a picture with all of Karasuno team members squashed together to fit in the frame, and Tobio stood a little bit too close he could caught a whiff of his shampoo, Kei immediately recognizes the smell. The subtle fresh lemon. Either Tobio was lazy to change to a newer one, or got attached to that one, or maybe doesn't even spare a thought of what shampoo he uses, either way, it gives Kei a warm nostalgic feeling. It's still Tobio, with all the little things Kei kept neatly in his mind.
Another thing that changed, or maybe, developed in Tobio is that he's now better at words. He can handle conversations much better than back in high school. Well, he is an adult now. Tobio talked a lot tonight, long sentences with everyone, with a relaxed face and freer laugh. It was different from the Tobio Kei remembered in highschool, who struggled a lot when he had to have talks with various people, team members, teachers and reporters. Kei enjoys seeing this new side of him. It's nice watching Tobio rambles, he can listen to him all day if the other boy asked him to.
But Kei can see that he's still Tobio who pouts when annoyed, confused, or just idling in his thoughts. Still Tobio who keeps his hands in prime condition with how he holds the cutlery in the restaurant they're in carefully. Still Tobio who's height still isn't reaching Kei's. And he still mulls about it, maybe even more now than back in high school, which gives Kei a good laugh that is still out of fondness.
And Tobio is still popular with girls, now also with guys and children, with how people instantly recognizes him and came up to him to ask for his autograph or a picture. And Kei is still looking at those interaction with weird feeling swirling in his stomach.
"You're gonna lose him quick if you don't act now," Yamaguchi's voice beside him made him startled, and gives him a weird sense of deja vu. They are now eyeing Tobio who's talking to a pretty woman, clearly interested in him. Kei could see that Tobio could keep up with the conversation much better, laughing and all. And it gives his stomach even more swirls. "I still don't get what you're stalling for, Tsukki," he can hear Yamaguchi's words again. "He's even more popular now, you know?"
Yamaguchi is right. What is he stalling for?
If what he feared was changes, and that his crush on high school was only a phase, and if Tobio or himself changed years later he's afraid he wouldn't came to like him again, look at him now. With all their changes and advances, their own growth and differences, Kei still couldn't take his eyes off Tobio. The same, yet different Tobio, with all the little things Kei kept neatly in his mind about him up till now, and is constantly adding more and more as he holds his gaze on the dark-haired boy with pouty face and a weird grin that Kei had engraved in his memory. It still hasn't changed. No, even if it had changed, Kei bets that he would still engrave it fondly in his mind anyway. Now Kei has decided.
When the gathering came to an end with good-nights and let's-meet-agains, Kei made sure to get ahold of Tobio, stopping him from separating ways and took Tobio's palms in his own. It's cold from the November weather, but Kei can still feel how Tobio took care of his hands everyday. Still a soft pair of hands, but now bigger, sturdier, and stronger. And Kei doesn't hate it. The wind blows the smell of subtle fresh lemon in Kei's direction. And Tobio's face when Kei took his hands was something Kei added to his list of little things about Tobio he'll keep neatly in his mind forever.
A surprised, red face that spreads to both ears, a different kind of glint in his eyes, anticipation, and a bit of, "finally".
It's still the same Tobio with all the little things Kei kept neatly in his mind. His Tobio with all the little things, old and new, that he will always keep neatly and specially in his mind.