Chapter Text
Tim sat at his desk in the precinct, the lights dimmed as the day shift transitioned into night. The never-ending stacks of paperwork seemed to multiply before his eyes - case files, evidence logs, custody reports - a tedious yet necessary aspect of the job. He rubbed his temples, the words on the pages blurring together into an incomprehensible jumble.
As he signed his name to another report, his radio suddenly crackled to life, jolting him from his thoughts.
"Dispatch to Bradford," the staticky voice called out. Setting down his pen, Tim reached for the radio. "This is Bradford, go ahead,"
"Sergeant Bradford, we just got a call from Officer Thorsen. There's been an incident on their call - we got word about an officer down. EMS is en route to transport Officer Chen to Shawn Memorial."
He felt his stomach drop, his heart beginning to hammer in his chest. "What happened?" he demanded, already grabbing his keys off the desk.
"Details are still coming in, but it seems Officer Chen was injured during an altercation with a suspect. Officer Thorsen is riding with her in the ambulance now. That's all I have at this time."
Tim was moving before the dispatcher had even finished, his mind racing as he strode rapidly from his office.
He raced through the halls of the precinct, boots echoing sharply against the linoleum floors. He barely registered the curious glances of other officers as he blew past them, his focus solely on getting to his truck.
As he burst through the doors of the station, the late afternoon sun did little to warm the chill that had settled deep within him. The drive to the hospital stretched out interminably, every stoplight felt like it was holding him back from where he needed to be, from where she was.
Siren wailing, he weaved expertly through traffic, willing the cars ahead to move faster. His fingers gripped the steering wheel tightly, knuckles white.
Tim parked haphazardly in front of the hospital, barely registering the lines of the space as he leapt from the vehicle and sprinted toward the emergency entrance. The automatic doors parted with a whoosh, the sterile smell of antiseptics hitting him like a wave. It was a scent he knew well, one that carried with it memories of pain and loss.
"I’m here to see Lucy Chen," he barked at the receptionist, his voice rough, the fear he'd been wrestling with sharpening it into something fierce.
"Are you family?" the receptionist asked mechanically, eyes already scanning her computer screen.
"She’s my girlfriend," he bit out, the words laced with emotion he rarely allowed himself to show.
"I’m sorry but I don’t have any information on that patient yet. If you could take a seat, sir, they'll update you when they can."
Sitting down was the last thing he wanted to do. Patience had never been his strong suit. He paced, the waiting area closing in around him, each tick of the clock a blow to his composure.
He pulled out his phone and dialed Angela's number, hoping she could provide some reassurance or at least a distraction from his spiraling thoughts.
"Hey Tim," Angela answered on the second ring. "What's up?"
"It's Lucy," he blurted out without hesitation. "She got injured on a call and they brought her to Shawn Memorial."
There was a moment of silence before Angela responded. "Oh my God, is she okay? What happened?"
"I don't know," Tim admitted, his voice cracking slightly with emotion. "I'm waiting here for an update."
"Okay, I'll be right there," Angela said firmly. "Just hang in there, Tim."
He thanked her before hanging up and resumed his pacing. He didn't notice Aaron until the younger officer was standing next to him, uniform streaked with blood - her blood. Tim searched his face wordlessly.
"Thorsen," he demanded, his voice roughened by an undercurrent of fear he couldn't suppress. "What happened?"
"It all happened so fast, sir. Lucy was arresting our suspect and the guy got the upper hand before she could cuff him. I couldn’t stop him in time," Aaron's words stumbled out, fractured by the weight of what he'd witnessed. "She's tough, you know that, but she took a bad hit. The guy slammed her head against the wall a couple times before I was able to pull him off her," Aaron continued, the tremble in his voice obvious.
Tim squeezed his eyes shut against the image, a muscle in his jaw feathering. "Was she conscious?"
"She wasn’t by the time we got here," Aaron replied, his normally stoic mask slipping as he ran a hand through his hair. "But she was still awake after it happened."
"And the suspect?"
"Cuffed and on the way to the station, sir."
He turned away, hunching over slightly as fatigue settled heavily on his broad shoulders. "She's going to be fine, right? Lucy is tough, remember?" Aaron ventured lamely.
He didn't trust himself to respond. Instead, he turned back to face the waiting room, staring sightlessly at the tan walls. A million scenarios raced through his mind, each one more gruesome than the last. He swallowed hard, hoping to push down the bile that burned his throat. This can’t be happening.
Tim sank heavily into one of the hard plastic chairs, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees. He dropped his head into his hands, fingers tangling in his hair. His leg started bouncing restlessly, nerves and adrenaline still firing through his veins.
Lucy's smile, bright and beaming, flashed through his mind. The image twisted, replaced suddenly by her crumpled form, blood matting her dark hair. He pressed the heels of his hands against his eyes, as if he could force the imagined scenes from his mind.
Time seemed to slow to a crawl. Tim kept his head down, unable to look up at the doctors and nurses rushing past. He couldn't bear to see the pity or worry in their eyes. So he stared at the speckled floor tiles instead, leg jostling restlessly, and waited.
He eventually glanced up at the clock again. Barley an hour had passed since he arrived, though it felt like longer. He scrubbed a hand over his face, worry and frustration etched in the lines of his skin.
The waiting room doors slid open with a whoosh and his head jerked up instinctively. Nolan rushed in, face creased with worry, Angela close on his heels. Her dark eyes were hard and flinty as they scanned the room before settling on him.
"Any news?" Nolan asked quietly as he approached.
Tim just shook his head, not yet able to find his voice.
Angela's dark eyes were sharp, her mouth pressed into a thin line. "What the hell happened out there?" she demanded.
He scrubbed a hand over his face. "She was cuffing a suspect when the guy got the jump on her. Slammed Lucy's head into the wall, over and over." His voice cracked on the last word and he pressed his lips together hard, struggling to maintain control.
Angela's face softened as she listened, her hard eyes filling with sorrow. She slowly sank into the seat next to him, the plastic creaking under her weight.
"Hey," she murmured, her voice gentle. She reached out and squeezed his knee, a simple gesture of comfort and solidarity. Tim glanced over at her, noting the empathy in her eyes. Angela said nothing more, just kept her hand resting lightly on his leg in silent support while they waited for news.
Tim practically jumped out of his seat when he noticed a doctor heading in their direction. The doctor was an older man with kind eyes and a somber expression. Tim's heart hammered in his chest as he quickly stood, Nolan and Angela rising with him.
"Family of Officer Chen?" the doctor asked.
"Yes, how is she," he said, his voice strained.
The doctor regarded the group with a sympathetic look. "Thankfully, Officer Chen’s injuries were not as severe as we originally feared. She suffered a severe concussion and some bruising on her forehead from the impact but thankfully there were no signs of a skull fracture or swelling of her brain. We've given her pain medication and she should be awake soon."
Tim let out a breath he hadn't realized he was holding, relief flooding through him. He looked over at Aaron and saw him sag with relief as well.
"Can we see her?" Angela asked.
The doctor nodded. "Yes, she will need rest but visitors are allowed for short periods of time."
He didn't hesitate, following as the doctor turned and led them down the hallway. As they made their way down towards Lucy's room, he felt his heart pounding in his chest. He couldn't wait to see her again, to know that she was okay.
He steeled himself before stepping through the door, preparing himself for the worst. But no amount of mental preparation could have readied him for the tidal wave of emotion that hit him when he saw her.
His breath caught in his throat as he took in the sight of Lucy looking so small and fragile against the stark white hospital sheets. One side of her face was mottled with dark bruises, the skin around her temple swollen and red. Tim had to clench his fists at his sides to stop himself from reaching out to brush the hair back from her face.
Lucy's eyes were closed, her breathing deep and even in sleep. He let out a shaky exhale, relief flooding through him at the sight of the steady rise and fall of her chest. She was still here, she was alive.
He took the chair next to her bed and gently grabbed her hand, intertwining their fingers. He studied her face intently, taking in the bruises and small cuts that marred her delicate features. Guilt washed over him that he hadn't been there to protect her. Angela and Nolan pulled up chairs on the other side of the bed, speaking in hushed tones about mundane topics in an effort to pass the time comfortably.
Tim stayed quiet, gently stroking Lucy's hand with his thumb while keeping his attention fixed on her face. The rhythmic beeping of the heart monitor and the hushed voices of his colleagues faded into background noise as he sat vigil by her bedside. After another hour, he felt her hand twitch slightly in his grasp. He let go and leaned closer, watching as her eyes began to flutter open.
Lucy's gaze, still clouded with confusion, scanned the room. She winced as she tried to shift to a sitting position. He stood and gently pressed his hand against her shoulder. "Careful," he said softly. "You're in the hospital. Don't try to move too much." Lucy's eyes finally focused on his face hovering above her.
"Tim?" she croaked, her voice rough. "What happened?"
Tim gently squeezed her hand. "You're in the hospital. There was an incident during an arrest, but you're going to be okay.”
Lucy nodded slowly as the events came back to her in fragments. A tense silence settled over the room.
She slowly raised her hand to her head, wincing as she felt the gauze taped to her forehead. He frowned in concern as he watched her, his heart aching at the pain and exhaustion evident on her face.
"Look what happens when you go patrolling without me," he said lightly, trying to inject some humor into the somber situation.
He expected to get a small smile, maybe an eye roll in return. But instead, Lucy dropped her gaze to her lap, looking utterly dejected.
"I'm sorry for disappointing you, sir," she said softly. "It won't happen again."
Tim felt as if he had been punched in the gut. He pulled his chair closer to her hospital bed before reaching out to gently grasp her hand in his larger one.
"Lucy, look at me," he implored. Slowly, she raised her eyes to meet his steady gaze. "You have absolutely nothing to apologize for. I was just joking, nothing about this is your fault."
Lucy just shook her head, unshed tears glistening in her eyes. "But I should have been better. Now you're disappointed in me and..."
"Stop," he interjected, his voice firm but kind. "I am not disappointed in you. Not even a little bit. You're one of the finest officers I've ever trained. What happened was not your fault."
He gave her hand a gentle squeeze, his eyes never leaving hers. "I need you to believe that. Can you do that for me?"
After a long moment, Lucy gave a small nod. The faintest hint of a smile pulled at her lips.
Tim watched her look down at his hand on her arm, a strange expression crossing her face. Noticing her discomfort, he quickly let go and pulled back.
Lucy winced again as she sat up further in the hospital bed. Her eyes were still clouded with confusion, and she glanced around the room uncertainly.
"Do you remember anything about what happened?"
She frowned, rubbing her temple gingerly. "No...no, I can't remember." Her eyes darted to Angela, who stood silently near the door. "If i wasn't with Bradford, was I riding with you today?" A look of concern passed between Tim and Angela.
"No, you were with Aaron."
"Aaron?" Lucy's frown deepened. "Who...who's Aaron?"
He exchanged another worried glance with Angela before turning back to Lucy. "What's the last thing you do remember?" he asked gently.
Her eyes narrowed in concentration, fingers idly playing with the thin hospital sheets. "This week is a little fuzzy," she admitted slowly. A small smile pulled at her lips. "But I do remember pulling over Mario Lopez a couple days ago. I’m not sure I’ll ever manage to forget that."
Her weak attempt at humor did little to cut through the tense air.
"What's going on?" she asked, glancing between them. "Why do you all look so worried?"
Tim opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. He looked to Angela helplessly.
Nolan was the one who stood up from his chair and came over to stand next to her bed. He placed a gentle hand on her shoulder, his eyes filled with sympathy.
"Lucy, the day you're remembering...that was almost five years ago," he said softly.
Lucy's eyes welled up with tears, her lower lip quivering. "Five years?" she whispered. "I can't remember the last five years?" The revelation was like a punch to the gut, knocking the wind from her.
He felt his heart drop as he watched the confusion and fear wash over Lucy's face. She looked so small and vulnerable lying in that hospital bed, struggling to make sense of the gaps in her own memory. An icy wave of helplessness washed over him. All he was to her five years ago was her T.O that she thought was an ass.
"How...how could this happen?" she choked out. "The last thing I remember clearly happened years ago. Did I...did I at least make it through my rookie year?"
Tim nodded, his jaw tight. "You made it through with flying colors. One of the best we've ever seen. You’re a P2 now."
"Will I get those memories back?" Her voice was small, childlike.
Nolan exchanged a look with him and Angela before turning back to her. “I’m not sure, we’ll have to talk to the Doctor and see what he says.”
Lucy gripped the thin hospital sheets, knuckles white. "What about my family? Are my parents...do I even still talk to them?"
Tim opened his mouth but he hesitated. He knew that she hasn’t spoken to her parents in over a year but in this moment, he really didn’t want to add anything else to her things to worry about.
Lucy looked down, shoulders hunching. "I guess that answers that question."
She took a shuddering breath, wiping fiercely at the tears that slipped down her cheeks. "What about..." Lucy trailed off, a blush creeping into her pale cheeks. "Am I...seeing anyone?"
He froze, the ache in his chest intensifying. How could he tell her that just yesterday, she was happily curled up in his arms? That they had just moved in together and were starting to build a life?
He let out a breath he didn't realize he was holding when Angela stepped in, placing a gentle hand on Lucy's shoulder. "How about we pause this conversation and I’ll go get your doctor," she said softly. "We can figure out the rest later once we know more."
Angela gave her shoulder a gentle, reassuring squeeze before slipping out of the room. An uneasy silence settled over the three of them left behind.
Lucy stared down at her hands, nervously twisting the thin hospital sheets. He watched her, his heart constricting at seeing the woman he loved struggling with the gaps in her memory. He longed to wrap her in his arms and promise her that everything would be okay. But the wary glances she kept casting in his direction made it clear she was still viewing him as nothing more than her training officer.
Nolan cleared his throat gently. "Why don't I give you two a minute?" he suggested. "I'll go grab us some coffee from downstairs."
Tim shot him a grateful look as he slipped out of the room. Now it was just the two of them left in tense silence.
Lucy finally glanced up, meeting his gaze. "I'm sorry," she whispered.
He frowned. "For what?"
"For not remembering. For making this..." she gestured helplessly "...awkward."
Tim shook his head firmly. "You have nothing to apologize for."
She bit her lip. "But it's like I'm a stranger to you now. To all of you." Her voice cracked on the last word.
He hesitantly reached out and took her hand in his. Her fingers were cold. "You're not a stranger," he said softly. "No matter what you remember or don't remember, you'll always be our Lucy."
She searched his face, as if looking for any hint of deception. But all she found was warmth and sincerity in his eyes. Slowly, she curled her fingers around his.
"What if I never get those memories back?" she whispered. "What if I'm never the Lucy you all knew again?"
"Then we'll get to know you all over again," he said simply.
Her eyes glistened with tears. But for the first time since waking up, he saw the faintest flicker of hope on her face.
When Angela returned with the doctor, Tim quickly dropped her hand and stepped out of the way.
"Miss Chen, I'm Dr. Johnson," he introduced himself with a smile.
Lucy managed a small smile back, but he could see the tension in her body as she waited for answers.
"From what I've gathered from your scans and tests, it seems you suffered from a severe concussion and some memory loss due to the accident," Dr. Johnson explained gently. "Acute memory loss is not uncommon with your type of injury so your memories may come back gradually over time, but there is no definite timeline."
Lucy nodded slowly, absorbing the information.
"As for your physical injuries, they will heal with time and proper rest," He continued. "But it's important that you take it easy and not push yourself too hard in the meantime."
"I understand," she replied softly.
"Do you have any other questions?"
Lucy shook her head no, but he could see the hesitation in her eyes.
“Actually,” Tim spoke up before he could stop himself. “Can we talk about her recovery plan?”
Dr. Johnson turned to him with a raised eyebrow.
“I mean,” he continued, feeling slightly flustered at being put on the spot like that. “Is there anything specific that she needs to do? Or not do?”
The doctor considered for a moment before responding. “Well, as I mentioned before, rest is crucial right now," he said sternly but kindly. "And she shouldn't be alone until we are sure of how much of her memory will return."
He felt his throat constrict at those words but he forced himself to nod in understanding.
"I'll make sure she has someone with her at all times," he promised, casting a glance at Angela who nodded in agreement.
---
Tim could feel his heart pounding as he sat outside Lucy's hospital room, waiting for her to be discharged. So much had changed between them in the past 24 hours. Just yesterday morning, they were happy and in love, but now, she looked at him with wary eyes, no memory of their relationship.
He scrubbed a hand over his face, emotions churning inside him. Fear, worry, heartache - it was almost too much to process. But more than anything, he felt an overwhelming need to take care of her and help her through this, no matter how long it took for her to remember. He wasn’t about to lose another women that he loves.
The door opened and Angela stepped out with Lucy, who was now dressed in regular clothes instead of a hospital gown. She still looked pale and fragile, her eyes shadowed with exhaustion. He stood up quickly.
"Hey," he said softly. "How are you feeling?"
Lucy gave him a weak smile. "Okay, I think. Just really tired."
Angela put a supportive hand on her back. "I'm going to take her back to my place for now," she told him. "We'll stop and pick up her prescriptions on the way."
Tim nodded, trying to ignore the pang in his chest at the thought of Lucy going home with someone else instead of him. "Yeah, that's a good idea. You shouldn't be alone right now."
Lucy ducked her head, looking uncomfortable. He felt a flush of guilt - she probably doesn’t understand why he’s still here.
"Call me if you need anything at all," he said gently. "I mean it, Lucy. Anything."
She met his eyes then, a flicker of some unreadable emotion in her gaze. "Thanks, Tim."
He watched them walk away, Angela's arm wrapped protectively around Lucy's shoulders. As soon as they were out of sight, he slumped back into the chair, dropping his head into his hands. He took a few deep breaths, trying to steady himself. She was alive and safe for now - that's what mattered most. They would figure out the rest one step at a time.
With renewed determination, he stood up and headed out to his truck. If Lucy was staying with Angela, he would stop by their house and pack up some of her things - clothes, toiletries, photos - anything familiar that might help jog her memory. They had a long road ahead, but he would be by her side every step of the way.
Tim felt the weight of fear and helplessness pressing down on him as he drove home. Every traffic light, every stop sign, seemed to taunt him with wasted time. He should have been there. He should have protected her.
Guilt gnawed at him. He had promised after her kidnapping to keep her safe. And now she was hurt again, scared and confused with no memory of their life together.
He parked haphazardly in their driveway, tires screeching on the concrete. Taking the stairs two at a time, he let himself in and stepped into the dark home. The cozy space still held her warmth, her scent. It took every ounce of his self-control not to break down right there.
He moved slowly through the living room, trailing his fingers over the back of the sofa where they had shared so many quiet nights in front of the TV. His eyes landed on a photo of the two of them at Lopez's birthday party, all wide smiles and bright eyes. Tim's throat tightened. Would things ever be that effortless between them again?
In the bedroom, his gaze snagged on the rumpled sheets of their bed, and the memories of this morning came rushing back - a morning spent tangled in each other's arms, trading slow, drowsy kisses. He sank down on the edge of the mattress and dropped his head into his hands. Fear and doubt crept in as he considered the possibility that those quiet moments of intimacy might be gone forever.
After taking a few steadying breaths, Tim stood and grabbed Lucy's LAPD duffel from the closet. He knew he needed to stay focused on the present - being what she needed right now. The rest would have to wait.
With hands that shook, he gathered an overnight bag for her. He moved through Lucy's drawers methodically, folding her favorite yoga pants and oversized sweatshirts into the duffel bag. He made sure to include some of the comfy pajamas she liked to lounge in on weekends when they stayed in, ordering takeout and watching movies until the early hours of the morning.
Slipping into the bathroom to collect her toiletries, he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror as he grabbed her toothbrush. His eyes were bloodshot, deep shadows beneath them. Stubble darkened his jaw. He looked as exhausted as he felt.
Slinging the packed bag over his shoulder, he left the too-quiet house and walked to his truck, trying not to think about how much he missed having Lucy beside ride with him. How she would brush her hand over his when they stopped at red lights. The memories were an ache in his chest that he couldn't afford to dwell on right now.
The sun had started to sink towards the horizon as Tim pulled up to Angela's house. He sat motionless in the truck for a minute, working up the nerve to go inside.
Finally, he grabbed the duffel and walked up to ring the doorbell, bracing himself.
"Hey," Angela greeted him, sympathy flashing across her face as she stepped aside to let him in.
Tim's gaze went immediately to Lucy, who was curled up on the couch under a blanket. She offered him a tentative smile that didn't reach her eyes.
"I brought some things for you," he said, holding up the bag. "Clothes, toothbrush, all that."
"Thanks," Lucy said softly. She started to get up but swayed slightly.
He crossed the room in quick strides and gently grasped her arm to steady her. "Whoa, take it easy."
Lucy tensed under his touch before relaxing again. "Sorry. Still feeling kind of dizzy and off-balance."
"Don't apologize," he said. "Here, why don't you sit back down. I'll bring this stuff to you."
She eased herself back onto the couch while Tim placed the bag beside her. An uncertain silence fell over them.
"Did Jackson let you into our apartment?”
He froze, her innocent question hitting him like a punch to the gut. How could he possibly tell her that Jackson was dead? He glanced helplessly at Angela, who gave a slight, solemn shake of her head. Not yet.
"I, uh..." Tim faltered, clearing his throat. "Jackson wasn't...available. I actually have a key to your place.”
It wasn't exactly a lie, but the bitter taste of omission still filled his mouth. Lucy studied him for a moment, her brown eyes filled with confusion and pain. Tim had to look away, unable to meet her searching gaze.
"Oh. I thought maybe he was too upset to come to the hospital earlier," she said quietly. "He must be taking this really hard. I should call him, do one of you guys have my phone?"
Tim felt his heart sink as she asked for her phone. He knew that when she unlocked it, she would be bombarded with the evidence of the relationship she had forgotten.
"Your phone was damaged in the struggle," he said slowly. "Why don't you try to get some rest first? We can see if we can get it working again tomorrow."
She nodded, her eyelids already growing heavy with exhaustion. As she drifted off, Tim adjusted her blankets and brushed a stray hair from her face. His touch lingered for just a moment, his skin prickling with electricity.
He glanced up to find Angela watching him, her expression unreadable.
"I should go," he said gruffly, standing. "I'll be by tomorrow to bring you both breakfast."
"Tim?" Angela's voice brought him out of his daze.
"Yeah?" he turned, guilt etched into his features.
"I'm sorry, I know this is...hard for you." Angela hesitated, clearly unsure what to say. "You guys were..."
"It's fine," he said brusquely. "I'm just glad she's going to be okay."
Tim gave a curt nod and left without another word. Once outside, he leaned against his truck, breathing ragged. He knew all too well that the road to recovery would be long and arduous for Lucy. And the thought of her leaning on someone else for comfort, anyone but him, was a knife twisting in his chest.
---
The next day, Tim showed up to Angela's house with breakfast, just as he had promised. In his hands he carries a paper bag filled with an assortment of breakfast sandwiches and pastries from Lucy's favorite cafe.
He knocked gently on the door, not wanting to wake them if Lucy was still resting. Angela answered, her hair mussed from sleep but her eyes bright.
Angela answers, looking surprised. "Tim? What are you doing here so early?"
"I brought breakfast, like I said I would." He holds up the food and drinks.
Angela steps aside to let him in. The smell of coffee fills the air.
"Lucy's still asleep, but I'm sure she'll be up soon. How are you holding up?" Angela asks gently.
Tim just shrugs, his face an impenetrable mask. He busies himself setting the food out on the counter - pancakes, bacon, hashbrowns. Comfort foods.
Angela watches him, concern in her eyes. She wants to reach out to him, but knows he'll just shut down. Tim has always been slow to open up.
"Coffee?" she offers.
"Please."
She pours him a mug and they sit in silence for a few moments. The events of the past 24 hours hang heavily between them. Wesley emerges from their bedroom, his hair disheveled from sleep. He gave Tim's shoulder an sympathetic clamp in greeting as he shuffled into the kitchen.
“Good morning, Tim.” Wesley mumbled, making a beeline for the coffee pot.
Tim glanced down the hall towards the living room before meeting Wesley's concerned gaze. "Good morning, I brought everyone breakfast. I’m sure Angela filled you in on what happened."
Wesley nodded solemnly as he filled his mug. "Ang told me all about it. Sounds like it was a close call."
"Too close," he muttered. They sat in contemplative silence for a moment, sipping their coffees.
Finally, Lucy emerges from the living room, bleary-eyed. She stops short when she sees him, a myriad of emotions passing over her face. Tim stands abruptly, almost spilling his coffee.
"Lucy..." he breathes, taking an unconscious step towards her. She looks so small and fragile, her arm wrapped around her torso. It makes his chest ache.
She gives him a tremulous smile. "Hey Tim."
They continue to stare at each other for a long moment. Angela glances between them, seeing the tension crackling in the air.
"I brought breakfast," he says gruffly, looking away.
"Thanks, you didn’t have to do that." Lucy's voice is soft as she sits down gingerly at the counter.
He busies himself making her a plate, avoiding looking into her eyes again. The domesticity of the moment weighs heavily on all of them.
Finally, he slides the plate in front of her. "Eat up. You need your strength."
Tim watched her pick at her food, barely eating more than a few bites. He noticed the dark circles under her eyes and the way she winced every so often, clearly still in pain.
"How are you feeling?" he asked gently.
Lucy gave a weak smile. "Sore. Tired. But I'll be okay."
He nodded, though he could see the brave face she was putting on.
"You’re doctor said you need to take it easy for a while to let your body heal," Angela added. "So no strenuous activity or going back to work until you’re cleared."
Lucy sighed but didn't argue. He knew how much being sidelined would drive her crazy.
"You can stay here with us until you're back on your feet," Angela said firmly.
Tim noticed an agitated look flash across her face as she stared down at her barely-touched plate of food. Her brows were furrowed, and she was gnawing almost nervously on her bottom lip.
"Thanks, I really appreciate the offer but I think I'd rather recover at my own place," she said quietly.
Lucy finally looks up, a troubled expression on her face. She turned to Tim with a frown.
"Actually, where do I live now?" she asked. "I wasn't thinking clearly last night after everything happened. But I’m guessing I don't live with Jackson anymore."
A tense silence fell over the group as they try to think of something to say. Lucy stared intently at Tim and Angela, suspicion creeping into her gaze.
"Okay, what's going on here?" she asked, setting her fork down on her plate with a clatter. "You two have been acting weird all morning. Giving each other looks, dodging my questions. There's something you're not telling me."
She huffed out an irritated sigh. "Just tell me already. I can handle it."
Tim cleared his throat, looking distinctly uncomfortable as he met her expectant gaze.
"Well...you actually moved out of your old apartment a few months ago to move in with someone," he began slowly.
"Wow," she murmured, chewing her lower lip thoughtfully. "That's...I mean, that's great, I guess." A wry smile crossed her face. "I must really love him if I wanted to move in with him."
She turned her gaze back to Tim, her dark eyes searching.
"So who is he? What's this mystery man like?" she asked. He shifted again under her scrutiny, rubbing the back of his neck.
"He's a great guy," Angela said evasively while smirking. "I know him pretty well. Strong, dependable, and he really cares about you."
"Well that tells me absolutely nothing," she complained. "Come on, give me details! What's his name? What does he look like? How did we meet?"
“Let's see...he's tall, over six feet for sure. Broad shoulders, muscular build, with these piercing blue eyes that seem to stare right through you," she began, eyes twinkling with mischief as she meets his gaze.
"He keeps his dark hair cropped short, military style. And he's got this sexy scruff on his jaw that you told me once was just perfect for nuzzling," Angela continued, biting back a grin as she watched Lucy's cheeks flush pink.
"As for how you met, it was at work actually. He started out as your superior but you caught his eye immediately. He seemed so gruff and stern at first, but you eventually realized it was all an act. Underneath that tough exterior he's really just a big softie."
Comprehension was slowly dawning in her eyes as she turned her head to look at Tim, who had gone quiet.
"No way," she breathed, her eyes darting between Tim and Angela. "It’s you, isn’t it? We’re dating?"
He gave a small nod, exhaling the breath he'd been holding. "Yeah, it's me."
Lucy stared at him, stunned into silence as she processed this revelation. Tim shifted uncomfortably under her gaze, unsure what to make of her reaction.
"How...how long have we been together?" she finally asked, her voice barely above a whisper.
He cleared his throat. "Almost a year now," he answered honestly.
Her eyes widened in surprise. She opened her mouth as if to respond, then closed it again, seemingly at a loss for words. He could see the confusion and shock written plainly across her face.
"A year," she repeated in disbelief. She lifted her gaze to his. "And we live together?"
Tim nodded, his expression softening. "Yeah. You moved into my place a few months ago. We thought we were ready for the next step."
Lucy looked thoughtful as she processed this information. He could see the uncertainty in her eyes.
"I'm sorry, this must be so strange for you," he said gently. "Waking up and finding out we're together, I know it's a lot to take in. Things were complicated between us five years ago."
Lucy gave a humorless laugh. "That's an understatement." She hesitated. "What are we like? As a couple, I mean."
He allowed himself a small smile. "We're good together. There's no one I trust more. You make me happier than I've been in a long time."
"So how does this work?" she asked. "I’m in your chain of command, isn’t there a rule against us being in a relationship?"
He smiled, encouraged that her initial shock seemed to be fading into curiosity.
"Like I said, it hasn't been easy," he admitted. “After we got together, I requested a transfer to a desk job to act as court liaison. I removed myself from your chain so there wouldn't be any conflict of interest."
"You did that...for me?" she asked in disbelief.
"I knew it was the only way we could make this work. Grey wasn't exactly thrilled, but he allowed it."
Lucy nodded slowly. After a moment, a hint of a smile played on her lips. "So...a desk job, huh? I have a hard time picturing you pushing paper all day."
He shook his head ruefully. "I'm sure it is, which is why you took it upon yourself to pull some strings. I still don't know exactly how you did it, but you orchestrated a five player trade to open up a spot for me in Metro so now I’m a Sergeant in that division."
She smiled, clearly impressed with herself. "Well, it sounds like I make a pretty great girlfriend."
"You've always been determined to get what you want. It's one of the things I admire about you."
She shook her head in wonder. "I must really love you."
Tim smiled, his heart swelling. "Yeah, you do. And I really love you."
"I can't believe I'm dating my TO." She paused, suddenly flustered. "I mean, you're not my training officer anymore technically but still—"
"I know what you mean," he said with a grin. "And for the record, I will always see you as my boot."
Lucy rolled her eyes but couldn't help but smile. "Well, as long as we're both on the same page."
They fell into a comfortable silence as she absorbs everything that she’s learned. "So," Lucy begins casually but he can see the blush growing on her cheeks. “If we’re dating, does that mean we’ve kissed?”
He raises an eyebrow. “Lucy, we have been together for almost a year now. We’ve done way more than just kiss.”
Her whole face flames red and she buries her face into her hands. “Okay, okay, TMI! I don’t need to know that.”
Tim couldn’t help but chuckle at her embarrassment.
“Maybe it’s a good thing you have memory loss. Because I would love to see you blushing like that every day.”
Lucy peeks through her fingers, glaring at him playfully. “Shut up.”
She bites her lip, looking uncertain. "So, what happens now? With us, I mean." she asks softly
He sighs, running a hand through his hair before choosing his words carefully. "Nothing has to happen, Lucy. You don't owe me anything. The last thing I want is for you to feel pressured into a relationship you don’t even remember. Maybe we should take a step back for now," he suggests gently. "I can stay with Angela or get my own place for the time being and we can just be friends again."
She was quiet as she searched his face. Tim could feel his heart hammering in his chest as he waited for her response.
"Do you still love me?" Lucy finally asked. "Even if I'm not the same person you fell in love with?"
"Of course I do," he replied without hesitation. "You'll always be the same Lucy to me."
She looks down, her eyes filled with sadness. "Tim, you don't deserve this," she says sadly.
He opens his mouth to respond, but she holds up a hand to stop him. "Please, just listen," she implores.
Tim closes his mouth and nods for her to continue.
“After everything you've been through, you deserve to finally be happy. I know how much you cared for Isabel and I could see how losing her broke something deep inside of you. You hid it well, but I could tell you were shattered."
She took a deep breath before continuing. "I don't know how long it will take before my memories come back, or if they ever fully will," Lucy said. "But from what you’ve told me and what I can see, we were happy and in love not even a day ago, and that means something to me. You've already been through so much heartbreak, I won't put you through that again. I’m not ready to be in a relationship right now, my mind needs time to catch up with my heart. But Tim, I'm not going to abandon you."
"Lucy..." he began hoarsely. "You don't need to worry about me. All I care about is you getting better."
She gave him a sad smile. "I know. You're one of the most selfless people I've ever met. But it's okay to be selfish sometimes too."
"I just...I can't lose you too," he admitted, letting out a shaky breath.
Lucy reached out and took his hand, giving it a gentle squeeze.
"Can I..." he hesitated, uncertainty flashing across his face. "Can I give you a hug?"
She gazed up at him for a moment before a hint of a smile crossed her face and she slowly stood up from her chair. Before Tim even had time to react she had stepped forward and wrapped her arms around his waist, pressing her cheek against his chest. He froze for a split second before slowly bringing his arms up to encircle her slender frame. One hand cradled the back of her head as he held her close. She felt so small and fragile against him but also solid and real. He let out a shaky breath, the tension in his body easing.
"We're going to get through this," Lucy murmured.
For the first time since it happened, Tim felt the knot in his chest begin to unfurl. As long as Lucy was here, he could face whatever came next. They would get through this - together.