Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

Basil hated waking up.
He hated having to go through more days than he already had. He hated what he was making of his life. So, when he gained consciousness today, before even opening his eyes, a quiet “Pling” noise infiltrated his ears. And another. And another.
He smiled at himself before opening his eyes. Dead flowers staring right through him.

Dry Cacti, bugs have eaten their insides. The nametag in the soil read “Kel!” with a doodle of a small orange beside the name.
Faded Gladiolus, the sunlight has turned their once bright red into a quiet pink. The nametag is practically unreadable now, due to being exposed to the sun for way too long, though Basil remembered whose Flowers those were. “Aubrey :)”.
Crumpling Lillies of the Valley, their stem has lost all sturdiness. They left their heads handing just ever so slightly more than normal for these plants. The paper read “Mari <”. Basil remembered that her nametag was just half of the whole thing.
A single rotting Sunflower. In a last attempt to stay alive, it turned its head towards the window a while ago, though that won’t make up for the lack of water.

Basil sighed as he sat up, dyed black hair falling over his face, before he finally opened the window. He already knew who was standing outside. Throwing rocks at Basil’s window would be a death wish for anyone except his best friend.
Basil, still half asleep, looked outside.
Sunny didn’t say anything. Not that he ever did. He’s always hated talking, so he decided not to talk unless necessary. Basil didn’t mind, though. He'd learned to read the Shorter’s wants by just looking in his eyes. “Hangout Spot?” he yelled. Sunny nodded and walked off.
Basil sighed and put on his coat on. Long and thin, anything but intimidating. His baggy jeans didn’t help with that. They didn’t work the best together, but fuck if he cared. He was just glad to slowly make his way to their old hangout spot. As a group, they haven’t used it since the day Hero was hospitalized.
Just the day before, he was laughing and playing with them.
Basil didn’t want to think about it anymore, but the moment he heard Hero’s name echo in his mind, he couldn’t stop it. The pictures played over and over in his mind.

It was a hot summer day. Basil felt the soft grass underneath him as he watched Hero run after Aubrey, Kel, and Mari. They were acting like he’s a bad guy, or something. They were reading the newest Captain Spaceboy Comic right before this, so who knows what they came up with this time.
Sunny and Basil were watching from the sidelines. They both weren’t too fond of running around. The younger took out his mechanical pencil and started sketching on his little sketchbook he somehow never forgot at home, as the blonde talked about all the wildflowers he could spot around him. How dandelions are practically weeds, but still his favorites. How it’s safe to eat daisies; the leaves are a little spicy-
A loud cough cut him off. Kel and Aubrey joked about how he shouldn’t get sick now, because they wanted to keep playing tomorrow. Mari and Hero just smiled at each other as he promised he’ll drink a lot of tea later to ensure he’ll be fine tomorrow.

Basil wanted to throw up. He didn’t want to remember.
The day after that, Hero was hospitalized. The floor and ceiling were white. Basil wasn’t entirely sure he didn’t get stuck in some kind of white void when walking in. At least, he wasn’t alone. Mari was on his side.
After finally entering Hero’s room, he only threw them a weak smile. He was happy to see them. He missed his friends more than anything.
Mari informed him that the others are on their way too, that they got caught up in something, Basil didn’t remember what. The blonde was way too focused on the sight before him. His friend, pale and weak, connected to some sort of machine, a heart rate monitor quietly beeping in the background. Hero noticed Basil’s face. Pure terror. He gave him his hand and gave a promise; A promise he wasn’t sure he could keep. “I’ll be back with you all before you know it Basil, don’t worry… Just take care of the others for me, alright?”. Hero tried to calm the younger boy down, beaming another smile in his direction.
Just minutes before their next visit, he fell unconscious. The last thing he'd seen were Mari’s flowers and cookies. The ones she had brought just the day before it. She tried not to cry, to stay strong for the children in their group, but it got too much. She held his hand to her face to hide the tears falling down her face.

Their last visit was the day they decided to turn off his life support. It’s been months, and there was no chance of recovery. Basil never found out what it was that killed him. What killed his friend, what killed the person he trusted with his life. And somehow, he didn’t want to know.

The pictures in his mind finally faded away. Basil somehow managed to fight the tears threatening to leave his eyes.

He fought through some bushes to finally get to their spot. “Sunny? You here already?” he yelled towards the exit. His initial, weak smile faded when he saw three figures closer towards the pond. Basil identified these as his old friends.

Sunny, apparently urging them to leave while looking behind him, panics. Maybe he just didn’t want a fight, but to Basil, it looked like a betrayal. Betrayed by his own best friend. Why was he with them? Basil didn’t care right now.
Aubrey, arguing back with him. Long, black hair swaying in the wind. She hasn’t dyed them back to their old, pink color since the night Hero was sent away. Only the pink ends remain. She might be able to stand up to Sunny, but she will turn tail when she notices Basil. At least, he hoped she will. He didn’t want to fight.
Last, Kel. He’s lost all the light in his eyes. Basil wondered if abandoning everyone just does that to you. He was just standing next to Aubrey as she argued, face in a complete neutral state. It reminded Basil of Sunny in the worst way possible. Basil stepped towards them with a look that could singlehandedly kill all of them.
This time, he isn’t going to run.

Sunny’s face states pure fear and panic. Not just because he knows he failed to protect his friends from what’s going to happen, but also because he knows something is going to go down here, right in this place, his favorite place in town.
Basil felt like he wanted to die for what he was about to do.

Chapter Text

Basil grabbed Aubrey and threw her on the ground. If she wasn't Sunny's friend, he would have laughed at how cartoony it looked. "Basil, what the fuck is wrong with you? We just wanted to hang out here for like, half an hour-". A kick to her face silenced her. Sunny couldn't help but notice how careful the other was while kicking Aubrey. A kick with the purpose of scaring, not to hurt. He's never seen him be that careful with anyone else, not like that. He never wanted to primarily hurt anyone, but this was... new.

"Get up and run, or I'll make you both regret it", Basil slowly turned to Kel, standing there with confusion and shock in his face. The first emotions they'd seen in him for 3 years. "Especially you", Basil scoffed, "Be grateful I let you run away. Never show your face in front of me again.". There was a certain tone of hurt in his voice, but only Basil himself noticed it. The others were probably busy trying to figure out what was going on.
When Aubrey walked towards him instead of walking towards the exit, he just snapped. He couldn't bear seeing them anymore. Seeing the girl that tried to move on way too fast. The guy that abandoned everyone and everything just to stay unaware of everyone else's pain. He grabbed Aubrey again and threw her into the pond, completely high on his own rage.

A quick look at his best friend in a "Let's go home" fashion was the only thing he could bring himself to do at that moment. Sunny shot him a look back. A look of disgust. And for a moment Basil must have missed due to him blinking, Sunny sprinted towards the water and jumped in. "You fucking idiot!" was the only thing he managed to get out before the cold water hit his face. Everything went silent. The water finally snapped him out of it. His friends are dying at this very moment, and it's his fault.
Everything went black. He didn’t know what it was. He could hear every little detail in that moment. The grass swaying slowly in the wind. A crow flying above them. A few air bubbles from the pond. He didn’t know why he couldn’t see, but that wasn’t going to stop him.
One step. He felt the earth shrinking under his feet, his weight pressing it together.
Two steps. A small flower was crushed underneath his foot.
Three steps. He could hear the wood of the dock creaking underneath him.
Four steps. He finally saw the blue water, reflecting his own image back to him. Everything else was still black. As he stared into the water, he saw his younger self staring back.
Five steps. As his body finally hit the cold water, he realized that everything he just felt must have been in the matter of a single second, based on the force that hit him inside the deep blue pond.

In a panicked attempt to get a hold of his friends, he frantically waved his arms around in the water until he felt a hand hold onto his own. He pushed up the person he got hold of, only to push himself further down in the process.
Basil’s eyes hurt. Basil’s arms hurt. The pressure of the water around him made Basil’s lungs get pressed together more brutally than his Binder ever could. Speaking of that, it didn’t help him at all in that moment, breathing harder than ever. Aubrey was floating in the water, seemingly unconscious. He couldn't hold his breath anymore, water perpetrating his lungs. It felt as if the liquid was consuming him. He knew this was his last choice.

Would he dive deeper and save Aubrey, risking his own life in the process? Or just dive back up, leaving Aubrey to rot?

The answer seemed obvious. It's his fault they're here, anyway. With one last push from his legs, he dove deeper and managed to pull Aubrey just close enough to the surface, somehow getting himself back up again as well.

His eyes were burning, tearing up to get rid of the water, as Sunny pulled out the unconscious Aubrey. Basil used what strength he had left to scramble out of the water before his head hit the soft ground. The lack of oxygen might've been even more of a problem than he realized. But, again, he didn't mind dying right here, right now. He had nothing left to go back to any more anyway.

To Basil's suprise, the next time he opened his eyes, he still seemed pretty alive. A warm blanket wrapped around him and music playing quietly from a speaker standing on the nightstand. Sunny laying right next to him. No matter how much he didn't want to admit it, he missed being close to his friends. The last hug he had was Hero, that day in the hospital... nevermind, he shouldn't think about that.

"Fuck off, I'm no crybaby anymore...", contrary to his words, though, he moved just a little closer to Sunny. "Sunny... why?" he whispered, the pain in his voice getting more obvious. "You should be mad at me, fuck, I should be mad at you, so why?". Sunny stared down at him. Basil didn't sound like the ruthless version of himself anymore. Maybe it was the voice cracks, maybe it was the pain in his words, or maybe it was the way Sunny felt tears wetting his arm slowly, but the person in his arms felt like... Basil. His best friend.

Basil never minded the fact that Sunny didn't like talking, but right now, he couldn't stand the silence, he just wanted to hear justification from his mouth. He wanted to hear how he hated him, or how he was furious, or how he felt pitiful. Yet the only thing he got was Sunny's careful stare. The look he gave was pure worry. Basil couldn't stand it.

"...come back for me when you feel like answering me" was the last thing Basil said before getting up and walking out the door. Sunny got up as well and sprinted after him to hug him from behind. Basil wanted to throw him off, to run away, but having someone so obviously care for him broke him. He hated the feeling it gave him, but he couldn't hold it back anymore. While he turned to cling onto his best friend, tears started falling from the taller's eyes. Sunny let him put his head on his shoulder. He let him just be Basil for a moment. Sunny made him feel a way he didn't want to feel anymore.

Just seconds later, he stopped crying and pushed Sunny away carefully.
"You heard me. Answer or let me go." Sunny pulled back his arms and with one last, caring look, he turned towards his room again.

After entering his house, Basil tried his best to avoid Polly. The boy didn't feel like answering all her questions about where he was and why his clothes were wet and whatever, not today. Just as he was about to enter his room, he heard his caretaker argue on the phone, though. That was something he couldn't miss. He made a bet with himself: It was probably his parents drunkenly calling after a long night in some bar in Germany again. "A rotten child? Sir, that's not what I was saying at all! He's been a little irritated since his friend passed, but...", Polly tried her best to calm the person on the phone down, panic in her voice. Basil closed his door with a small scoff. He didn't want to listen to any more of their discussion, not anymore. *He* was the rotten one, even though they left their child with his grandma to travel around their home country again. And they never even bothered to teach him German. His old grandmother did it instead, but to not bother her, he started learning it by himself, with books and such. And considering what hellhole of a language German really is, it took years, and he still wouldn't consider himself a fluid speaker. He mainly uses it to ramble to himself anyway, so who really cares about how good or bad it was.

"Rotten child". Those words didn't leave his head. No matter how much he didn't care about his parents, hearing that felt like they stabbed him right in the heart. He opened his window and looked outside. The sun was already set, so the stars made their appearance in the sky. Basil felt as if the stars stared right through him. He stared back.

If Sunny was here right now, he'd probably tell him about all the different constellations he could see. Or the northern star, or different galaxies they could theoretically see but can't. With a sigh, he lit a cigarette. His last one. He's got to make plans to get some new ones tomorrow.
He started smoking thinking it'd make him cool, but the moment he realized that that was stupid, he realized he couldn't put it down anymore either. He'll always hate fourteen-year-old Basil for that, but cursing himself out won't change anything.

He decided to try to look at Aubrey's house just a few meters away from his own. She probably wouldn't want to see him right now, so he dropped the thought of checking in immediately.
He didn't know what to do now. He didn't have any schoolwork for the next few weeks, his room was... fairly clean, and he hadn't touched his sketchbook in a while. He just decided to call it an early night.
After sending one last apologetic text to Sunny, not his style, but required after whatever happened at the shorter's house.

Basil looked around his room. He never realized, but the lilies of the valley… their broken stem made them look like they were leaning on the roses.
The roses were some of the only plants Basil still took care of. He put out his cigarette and walked closer. The nametag on them were still readable, just as the one on the lilies were.

“Mari <” “3 Hero”

Chapter Text

Basil raised his head off the ground. He was back in this horrible, white void. Everywhere we looked, it was white. No shadows falling, no lights hanging from the ceiling. Everything is quiet. He’s been here before. He knows this is a hallway.
He started walking slowly. His footsteps echoed. It was the only thing he could hear at that moment. The black-haired boy finally saw something in the distance. It looked like windows on his right, maybe floating, maybe actually part of a wall. He didn’t care. He sprinted through the hallway. He didn’t want to stay here.
His own footsteps get louder, as if he was running towards himself. In the corner of his eye, he saw a reflection in the windows. A young, blonde boy running through an endless hallway. Blue eyes filled with fear. The fear of losing his friend. He decided to slow down for just a moment, comparing his height to the figure in the window. He was taller, his hands were bigger, his hair thinner. In a panicked attempt to get away, he started running once again. He called for Hero, he called across this endless hallway, even if he knew Hero wasn’t here, Hero couldn’t save him this time.
Hero was gone.
The more he progressed, the more windows he came across, until every single part of his vision was filled with his own weakness.
He saw a young boy who has lost the light in his eyes; a young, scared boy who didn’t know how to move on.
He saw Kel, Aubrey, and Mari behind him. They looked just as scared as him; and then, they walked away. They disappeared somewhere in these endless white fields.
Basil looked around him frantically, trying to find them, trying to get them to stay.
And then, it all disappeared.

The windows were replaced by a single, white door. It cast a faint shadow in front of Basil.
He didn’t want to open it; he knew what was hidden behind it, but he knew he didn’t have a choice. He slowly gripped the handle and pressed down, opening the door just enough to look inside.
It wasn’t the same hospital room he has seen past this door so many times. He saw a neatly cleaned bed, a handbag resting on top. An old pc on a table to the left, and yet another window, though this one let him see a sky full of clouds, rain slowly gliding along the glass. Light-green walls towering over the wooden floor. When he opened the door fully, he saw two young boys resting on a second bed.
The slightly smaller, black-haired boy held the taller blonde close to himself. He held him so incredibly gentle, like the other might break if he wasn’t careful enough. Small sobs came from the taller. A light blue blanket on top of them both, keeping them warm on a stormy day like this.
Basil recognized the boys. Of course he would. He walked towards them as he realized they wouldn’t notice him.
He put his hand on the crying Childs shoulder, with the same amount of care the younger gave him. Fingerless gloves touching the light green fabric of his shirt. If they could see him, the cold, steel ring on Basil’s finger would have startled the blonde. He didn’t want to admit it, but Basil wanted to go back to these days. Seeing himself like this made him realize more than ever. He convinced himself he was weak, but he was true. He was true to himself and his friends. He wanted this loyalty to himself, while not losing his strength. While not losing the power he has right now.
“Hero… what am I supposed to do now?”

There was no answer. Not that he expected one. Just as Basil wanted to take his hand away, his younger self mumbled something, just loud enough for him to hear.
“I just want everyone to be happy…”
A pained smile made its way onto Basil’s face. He couldn’t even try to fulfill his own wish.
He felt a hand on his shoulder with the same amount of care he gave his younger self.
He turned around and-

Basil woke up with a jump. He caught a glimpse of brown, messy hair before he woke up, but that was about everything. He sighed and held his hand to his forehead before looking up the time on his phone. 4 am. Way too early.
He didn’t think he could fall back asleep, but a few of his favorite songs should do the trick. Basil put down the phone again and turned on his side before slowly dozing off again.
Everything went dark slowly, his vision blurring as he took one last look at the tulips on his nightstand.
He found himself back in Sunny’s room once again. But this time, he wasn’t looking at them. He wasn’t seeing his younger self, either. He was the one lying in his best friend’s arms this time. The familiar feeling of the younger’s arms around him, the familiar warmth of Sunny’s bed, it was the only place he still felt safe to let go. It was the only place he’d still feel like home. A light blue blanket keeping them warm. The familiar sound of their favorite song playing from Sunny’s nightstand.
And there, he cried again. In his best friend’s arms, once again. Sunny was the thing making him weak. That’s it. That must be it. But he also made him feel like he doesn’t have to be strong for once. Being around Sunny confused him, but he tried not to think about it for a moment. He finally let all the pain out, everything he felt, but when Sunny noticed his crying, he let go of Basil.

Sunny got up from the bed and walked towards the exit of the room. Basil panicked. He didn’t want to be left alone. He couldn’t handle being alone right now. He wanted to scream, to yell for Sunny not to leave him, but the words didn’t leave his mouth. He tried grabbing for Sunny’s hand, but his hand just went right through the Shorter’s. He turned his head towards the older again before leaving the room. Basil couldn’t get him back. The only thing he had left in his life, his best friend, left him. He was all alone again. He couldn’t reach out to anyone. He sat on the creaky wooden floor, trying to scream for his friends.
“Sunny!”, it didn’t work. His mouth felt like its glued shut.
“Kel!”, the name finally left his mouth. Though, he didn’t get a response. Kel wasn’t here. He locked himself away years ago.
“Aubrey!”, he saw a glimpse of long, black hair outside the open door. She looked inside. Two pairs of blue eyes met, but she turned around and left. Aubrey was mad at Basil.
“Mari!”, every name he screamed out started to echo outside of this room. But Mari wasn’t here, either. She left years ago.
“Hero!”, everything was gone. He was back in the white void. There was no echo. There was no sound. The only thing here was Basil. Because Hero died years ago.

Everybody left him. Hero left them. Mari left them. Kel left them. Aubrey left him.
Sunny will leave him.

Chapter Text

Sunny felt the soft earth underneath him. A soft voice reminded him of where he was.
“Sunny! I’m sorry, did I wake you up?”. There was actual concern in that voice; it almost made Sunny feel bad.
He got up, lifting his head from the lap he was just using as a pillow, to look at the boy the voice belonged to. Baby blue hair swaying in the soft wind, with the light purple sky visible behind him; it was almost perfect.
Sunny fixed his hair, the same purple color as everyone else had, except Basil, for some reason. He decided to ignore it. Maybe some subconscious thing he didn’t feel like facing right now.
He looked around the playground, specifically the picnic blanket they were sitting right now, before shooting Basil a questioning look.
“Oh, right! The others went somewhere because Kel wanted to show them something… I think. I said I’ll stay here because I didn’t wanna wake you up, you looked really peaceful.” He gave an awkward smile. “So! I hope you don’t mind… we can go look for them if you want.”.
Sunny shook his head. He liked that it was just a little quieter than normal, and he didn’t mind spending some time with Basil either.
Basil apparently worked on another Flower Crown in the meantime. The yellow color it got from the dandelion base was perfectly matched by the little daisies woven amid them.
Sunny watched how his hands carefully handled the flowers, petals brushing against his soft skin. His expression was fully out of it, only paying attention to the plants in his hand.
He loved watching his best friend do his thing. He leaned onto his shoulder with a long sigh, smiling ever so slightly. He was just about to say something before suddenly, there were loud footsteps tapping behind them.
“BOO!”, a high voice yelled as he got ahold of Basil’s free shoulder. The latter flinched, almost dropping his work in the process.
He chuckled, still a little shaken from the scare. “G-god, Kel, don’t do that…”, he sighed.
Sunny moved his head from Basil’s shoulder to look behind him. His friends were walking towards them before sitting down closely to them.
“Sunny, you better WISH you would’ve seen this! I found the COOLEST place to hang out-“
“It was just a little clearing in the forest”, Aubrey cut him off. Hero and Mari were just smiling at each other, like two idiots in love, which they pretty much were. Well, Hero was a bigger idiot than Mari.
Sunny liked this life. Every day was almost the same, he always had problems with change. He had his friends, and his best friend.
It was close to perfect.
Sunny couldn’t help but smile at Aubrey and Kel bickering about how cool this place was, Hero and Mari trying to calm them down and Basil just smiling back at him, enjoying the familiarity of the situation.

The sunshine was dancing through Sunny’s window before it hit his pale face, waking him up in the process.
Right. That perfect world has been long gone.
Sunny stretched, rubbing his eyes, before getting up to take his pills.
Vitamin B. No actual medication. Even though he was convinced he’d need some, but what is he supposed to do about that.
As he swallows the small, yellow pill, a familiar taste of flour spread in his mouth, and with it, spread the wish to not need these every day.
Sunny wasn’t a morning person at all. It always took him a look at his phone to know what day it is and what’s going on.
Two new messages from two chats. Who even texts people this early into the day?
The first was a message Mari send. “Hey my little gremlin, don’t forget I’m finally coming for a visit on Friday, make space for me and don’t rob any banks for that week pls <3”
Sunny let out a quiet laugh before responding. “Damn it, gotta text Basil we have to rob all the banks BEFORE Friday now, not enough time to prepare, could’ve reminded me earlier :/”
On the topic of texting Basil, the second message rested underneath a chat called “Flower <3”. The picture showed two young boys looking into the camera, smiling and hugging. Sunny never wanted to change the contact photo he gave his best friend, but right now, his reaction was to turn his phone off for a few seconds and take a deep breath. Every time he had a dream like today, it got harder and harder to accept the truth of what they all became.
He unlocked his phone again and decided to read what Basil send.
Received at 9 pm. That was just 30 minutes after he left his house. What if something happened, he needed help, and Sunny wasn’t there for him? What if his parents went off at him again, what if he couldn’t deal with his thoughts again?
Sunny took another deep breath as he focused on the feeling the sunshine gave him on his skin, warm and comfortable, but dangerous.
He finally looked at the message.
“hi sun hope youre okay i didn’t mean to yell. or cry. or leave like that. or blame you for not speaking. actually i didnt mean for anything that happened yesterday to happen. im sorry. hope you forgive me. see you.”
Sunny tried not to laugh but failed. He forgave Basil before he even walked out the door yesterday. And crying was the last thing he should apologize for, anyway.
He wore a bittersweet smile while replying, eyebrows furrowing a little.
“Basil, you know I’m not mad, it’s okay. Do you want to come over, maybe?”
Three dancing dots appeared on the bottom left of his screen in the matter of seconds, God, did Basil actually wait for him to reply?
“low energy day. you come.”
Sunny let out another weak smile before getting ready to meet with his best friend again. He’s missed him. He’s happy, but his gut feeling just wouldn’t leave him alone.
Something would go horribly wrong today.
Or maybe it was just Sunny’s anxiety. Yeah, it probably was. What’s supposed to happen?
He put on his shoes before walking outside, checking if he got everything he needed.
Phone, Wallet, Keys… he was ready to go.
The slightest smile was spreading on his face as his feet carried him to Basil’s house.
Everything was gonna be okay.