Work Text:
Chongyun didn’t know why he’d agreed to this.
He used to pride himself on his discipline. Years of solo traveling taught him to keep within his body’s limits—or so he thought.
Somehow, he could never say no to such a pretty face.
Meeting him on the road had been a stroke of pure fortune. Just when he’d been running dangerously low on qingxin-infused popsicles, Gaming found him and offered to share some of his rations. He even insisted on tagging along to keep him company—if only to make sure Chongyun didn’t pass out a second time.
His embarrassing predicament aside, it should have been an easy return trip to complete. Chongyun didn’t need an escort. He had traversed this terrain plenty of times on his own, even in this summer heat, and he sure as hell wasn’t about to let any bandits catch him off guard.
There was just one small problem.
“Careful, the path gets rocky here!”
Under the harsh glare of the midday sun, Chongyun tried to remember his breathing techniques. Already, dizzy spots were blooming behind his eyelids.
This wasn’t a good sign.
As they continued on the upward trek, Gaming didn’t falter once under the heavy load of cargo he carried, chatting away like usual—it barely seemed to faze him. A bead of sweat slid down, pooling in the smooth dip of his collarbone, a glimpse of sun-bronzed skin.
Don’t look. Don’t look.
Chongyun caved.
For an ordinary guard, he sure knew how to draw attention. Jagged scars curved round his waist and torso like snake-skin, disappearing under the slits of his sleeveless hoodie. Watching the flex of his arms from behind, all fluid muscle; sweat, that tantalizing sheen—Chongyun had to bite his tongue hard to keep his impulses at bay.
This blistering heat was going to eat him alive.
It was simple admiration and nothing more. Chongyun knew the years of hard work and discipline that went into maintaining such a toned physique. Escorting people through treacherous terrain was no easy task, even for the most experienced guards.
He’d just never seen any ordinary guard look like that.
When they stopped for a much-needed water break, Chongyun took extra care to keep his thoughts in line. He waited patiently as Gaming downed the rest of his water all in one go, the hem of his sweat-soaked shirt sliding up his stomach, and suddenly Chongyun wasn’t listening to a damn thing he was saying anymore.
He might have made a significant lapse in judgment.
It wasn’t like him to be so distracted. He never knew his body could feel like this, in a constant state of tension—so activated, heady, shameless. Worst of all, he never knew he would grow to like it so much.
“You sure you’re okay? You’ve been staring for a while.”
He’d already forgotten what they were talking about by the time Gaming’s hand slid down to his hip, a thumb brushing his waist—it left him feeling breathless. Caught in the act. When did they get so close?
“Ah—yeah… It’s just hot out, that’s all.”
Knowing it was dangerous to linger, he found himself drawing ever closer to that peripheral intensity. Every fleeting glance, every spark and flicker—he’d never been good at self-preservation, and Gaming’s eyes danced like fire on his skin, making his pulse flutter dizzy and quick.
“Why don’t I take you home? It’s close by. I don’t mind helping out a friend.”
Too close. It was indecent, it was ill-fitting, but Chongyun loved it, the subtle hint of a promise that was beyond anything he’d dared to dream of. No one had ever looked at him like that, touched him like that.
He should’ve known this wouldn’t be easy.
It took all of his remaining self-control to decline. Whether real or half-imagined, he was so thoroughly infatuated that it was impossible not to give up the slightest concession:
“Next time, then. Just ask for my name, okay?”
Such words were unnecessary, when the desire trickled into his dreams nonetheless, dripping onto his sheets like a silver spool of moonlight, making him shiver with a heat-sickness that wouldn’t dissipate.
“Archons, Gaming…”
It was the first time he pressed his face into his pillow and breathed in prayer, touching himself in ways he never had before, yearning for a heat that wasn't there. His inner self was so repressed that it burned.
So he let it flow forth—this chance encounter was all he needed.
It was his imagination that made love to him that night, the weight of desire pressing him down into the sheets, searing the back of his neck. Thick fingers that held him down and took him slowly, deliberately, reclaiming every inch of warmth long buried within. He touched himself like he was trying to carve himself open—god, how would it feel? Would he take his time? How big would it feel from inside?
Chongyun hadn’t let go of himself like this in years, never dared to imagine it. He used to live in fear of the consequences, of the raw havoc of his body, clawing its way to the surface and seeping through the cracks.
Now that he knew of the glittering world that lay beyond, his fingertips were itching for a lifeline to hold. He was selfish. He wanted more than just a fantasy.
A lover who was unafraid to take control. Kissing between his shoulder blades, laying him down in the center of the world. Guiding his body open for the first time.
Out of all his most shameful fantasies, this had to be the worst.
He never knew it could feel like this.
Since then, he couldn’t even think about that guard without being reminded of sticky sheets and a guilty conscience. Now he couldn't even get himself off without it, couldn't reach nearly deep enough on his own—
This wasn’t like him at all.
There was no way he would let a stranger ruin him so easily, walking into his life and working him up like it was nothing. Chongyun had years of self-restraint under his belt—it wasn’t like him to make a special request for something so impulsive, so inappropriate, to all but crumble apart the moment he saw that familiar face drawing near, nearly sparkling with excitement, a knowing glint in his eye.
“I knew you’d come around.”
A casual reminder. Gaming’s hand found its way back to his hip, drawing him into the dark and making him burn.
It held him captive. The eyes that lingered as the melting sweetness of a popsicle dripped from his mouth and fingers—a sweetness that was quickly replaced by lips and tongue, hushed kisses in a shadowed alley, melting down layers of reluctance and fear.
It didn’t matter that they had only just met a handful of days prior. These fantasies had all but consumed his mind, granted him no solace, deprived him of even the sanctity of his own bedroom. Chongyun couldn’t control the surge—and so he gave in easily, senseless to the world.
Velvet lips whispered into his ear, a remedy to his wanting heart.
“Just relax. I'll make it good for you.”
It was a promise so impossibly soft, edged with teeth, something dangerous playing in his murmured words.
Chongyun got hard so fast he nearly passed out.
It was Chongyun's first time, but he wouldn't tell him that. Just let himself indulge in the unfamiliar heat creeping up his spine, the tingling aftershocks everywhere Gaming touched—in the warm hands sliding up his waist, lips kissing down his jaw. It was his first taste of freedom, of rebellion. There was so much he’d missed out on.
He wanted to try everything—his first kiss, his first touch, everything.
For that moment in time, the world was condensed down to the breath shared between their lips, of soft and unspoken confessions in the night. Hands moved in the hollow spaces of his heart, relearning sensation in the dark. He didn’t want to forget a single detail.
A new world, a whole galaxy had opened before him. It was this beautiful stranger who swept him up by the waist, breathed life into his parted lips, willing to promise the world if only Chongyun would give him a chance—and Chongyun had no choice but to concede.
Unlike him, Gaming’s body spoke a language of leisure. A soft caress of his cheek, slow fingertips in the dark; he made loving look so easy. Chongyun’s blood ran hot with envy.
“I just can’t get enough of you.”
Thick and sluggish, Chongyun’s heart was beating in all sorts of wrong places. One kiss, one touch of praise, was all it took to untether his restraints, and he was floating through his body, free falling through the night, drawn out so far out along that edge that he was beyond the verge of spilling over.
So he let himself go.
The night market was aglow with activity and Chongyun gave into the current, his whole body singing, blissfully numb. He’d never been so high, never felt so free. He rode out the tremors and came out feeling alive, for the first time in his life.
Long after they parted, he was left starry-eyed and throbbing. Lips tingling from one too many kisses.
A thumb traced his shiny bottom lip, breaking from their saliva-strung kiss.
And by the looks of it, the feeling was more than mutual.
“Mind if I spend the night?”
There he decided, he may willingly drown in this feeling for as long as he could bear it.
Chongyun told himself he wouldn’t get attached.
That resolve didn’t last long.
It was almost impossible to keep their hands off each other. Gaming took him somewhere new every time, wherever and whenever their paths happened to cross, fulfilled the fantasies he didn’t even know he had.
He came to realize that Gaming liked to treat his lovers—and Chongyun was no exception. Taking him out to dinner, buying him nice things, carrying all his belongings. He even let Chongyun pick whatever he wanted from the menu and paid in full, despite Chongyun’s insistence to split the bill.
All it took was a few nice words and Chongyun was halfway in his lap, melting when Gaming kissed and cooed at him.
Chongyun was getting dizzy from all the attention. It was nothing at all like he was used to.
“This is all it takes to make you happy, huh? You sure your boyfriend won’t mind?”
“He’s not my boyfriend,” Chongyun hissed, flushed to the tips of his ears. Gaming rubbed circles into his hip. This dinner wasn’t going at all the way he’d imagined. “And—don’t say that. You always spend so much on me…”
He squeezed his eyes shut, unable to breathe as warm lips teased the shell of his ear.
“But you’re so cute like this. How could I resist?”
In spite of himself, Chongyun tilted his head to give him room, and Gaming returned the favor, nuzzling sweetly under his jaw. Always spoiling him rotten.
“You could at least try not to go broke this time.”
“Come on, baby. You can just admit that you like it.”
It was like he didn’t even need to try—one word and Chongyun was already on the verge of overheating.
He didn’t have the faintest idea why Gaming liked him so much, but he wasn’t about to question it now. It was embarrassing enough to think about how quickly Chongyun fell for him, already lost in the patterns of this simple routine. It was so easy.
“Would you two like anything else to order?”
Chongyun’s shoulders climbed up to his ears. He buried himself to hide in Gaming’s shoulder. Gaming only laughed, soothing him with a kiss.
Just you.
After traveling the whole day, Qiaoying Village was the perfect refuge to stop and rest a while before sundown—and get another quickie in, by Gaming’s subtle insistence.
Chongyun wasn’t usually one to idle his time away, but he found himself making more indulgent decisions lately for this boy he’d known all of two weeks.
“How can I get you to come visit more often?” Gaming whispered between kisses, half-hidden by the sprawling shadows of the rooftops. He’d drawn Chongyun behind the convenient cover of a building for making out, and Chongyun could never refuse him. “I could take you to my place, show you around. What kinds of things do you like?”
“You don’t have to do any of that,” Chongyun said. “I’m here because I like you.”
“Aw. Who knew you were such a softie?”
There it was—that stupid, boyish grin. Gaming kissed his pouty lips and laughed.
Physical affection was still new to him. Chongyun didn’t really understand how any of this worked. He was easily overwhelmed by the buoyant feelings inside of him, half-afraid of the aftermath.
Luckily, Gaming didn't seem to mind showing him the ropes.
“You do so much for me,” Chongyun murmured. “How could I ever pay you back?”
Gentle fingers slid through his hair, cradling the back of his head.
“I can think of a good idea.”
Instinctively, Chongyun released an incredulous breath, stirring the warmth between their lips.
“You’re so cheesy.”
Mountain wind brushed through the treetops of Chenyu Vale, rustling through his hair, and Gaming's soft laughter was like sugar water on his lips. This far out from the city, the whole village was steeped in this peaceful quiet, a world just for two—in this moment, no one else existed.
“You like it, though.”
And there, swathed in the moon-shine, Gaming met him halfway in a kiss.
From there, it loosened into a gentle cascade—a tingle of warmth on his lips, slowly budding down into a flowing current, all the way to his trembling fingertips. Kissing him always felt like he was drowning in light. Whenever he was on the verge of suffocating, of losing himself to sheer numbness, Gaming would press his mouth to his and give him the oxygen he so desperately needed, craved.
It always took him a while to settle into the motions. Gaming's fingers interlaced with his, a thumb stroking his inner wrist, a slow revival as he finally remembered to breathe.
Gaming always went slow at first, mindful of his sensitivity. He was so sweet to him, anticipating his every need. Tender to the touch.
Chongyun couldn’t remember how he’d lived his life without this. Without him.
“Deep breaths. How does it feel?”
He pressed his cheek to Gaming’s shoulder and exhaled slowly. There was a smile in Gaming’s voice—just a hint of pride, nothing less.
“See? Not bad, right?”
“Mm…”
Chongyun's head was full of soft and fuzzy clouds. He could stay like this forever, lost in a haven of warm sky, of fingers pressed in the divots of his waist. An unattainable dream—and now, it was here before his eyes, glossy and summer-soft. A mirror reflection of happiness. He never knew he could feel this way, too.
Love. Was it really such an impossible thing?
He turned his head to the side. A smile came easily to his lips, unbidden, when Gaming nuzzled into his neck, lazily content.
“Stop doing that, it tickles,” he laughed. “You’re like a puppy.”
He could feel Gaming’s lips curve into a smile, kissing the edge of his jaw.
“Yeah? A cute puppy, right?”
In lieu of a response, he slid his arms around Gaming's shoulders and mindlessly chased Gaming's lips with his own, catching him in a moment of surprise. A low sigh rolled through Gaming like a purr, so full of satisfaction, before he hoisted Chongyun up in his arms to lavish him some more.
Gaming was just too easy to adore. He was like a cotton candy sunset, always changing colors, and Chongyun wanted to map out the sweetness of his mouth, taste all the hues of the evening light. He wanted to know the story of every bruise and scar, to ease the tension from overworked muscles—just like how Gaming helped him with no expectation of reward. Days, weeks, months could pass and it wouldn’t change a thing.
This was different than before. Kissing him was like being engulfed in the embrace of a summer ocean; wave after wave, both overwhelming and comforting at every turn, Chongyun turned to liquid ice under the sensation, where he could feel every heartbeat as if it was his own. Slowly let his dizzy mind return back to the ground, anchoring himself to this encompassing warmth, hands finding the thin taper of Gaming’s waist.
And Gaming indulged his every impulse, every time. He ignited a slow-burning match to his lips, breathing in the same sunset smoke, and Chongyun was just barely able to breathe within this impossibility of feeling, the colors of this storybook hue.
Until a sly tongue pressed to his, coaxing his mouth to open further.
A sharp jolt of anticipation slid down Chongyun’s spine, a wildfire stirring deep in his gut, unable to be contained.
Shameless.
He could barely think to reciprocate before Gaming pulled away, a teasing hint of a smile on his lips. Chongyun knew all too well what that smile was capable of.
“Excited?”
From how close they were together, Chongyun’s vision was flickering in the dark. The surge of his heartbeat filled the silence, blood rushing down, and suddenly he couldn’t hide it anymore.
If Chongyun had any less self-control, he might say he was addicted.
“I should really get going,” he said, breathless.
“I’ll only be a minute or two, promise. You don’t mind, right?”
“Wait—Gaming.” His pulse thrummed where Gaming’s lips met his neck, and there he nipped Chongyun right under his jaw, playful and sweet, tongue laving over a still sore hickey. “N-no more marks. Someone might see.”
The slight tug of hair at his nape made him whimper, his whole body stiffening in surprise as Gaming’s lips lowered to the crook of his shoulder, mouthing the exposed valley of skin—a mirror to his fluttering pulse, the mark of a butterfly’s ascent.
“But if someone saw, that'd just turn you on more, right?”
As he sucked in the first bruise, Chongyun’s mind went perfectly blank.
He turned his face to the side, biting his lip so hard it peeled underneath. Such a sweet tone of voice, such filthy words.
Gaming didn’t have to ask. He never had to. Slipping under his waistband, slender fingers cupped the front of his erection, dragging out every sensation. Even the slightest glide of his fingertips was purely tortuous, and oh, Chongyun lost himself in the heated curve of Gaming’s palm, giving him everything he needed and nowhere near enough.
Gaming knew just how to mess with his head. It was never just a minute or two when it came to him—and still, Chongyun couldn’t find the words to refuse.
“Look at you." Gaming nipped the shell of his ear. The barest hint of teeth sent a shiver through Chongyun’s body. “Did you really miss me that much?”
Chongyun’s breath hitched in his throat. His ears were bright red.
“Yes.”
There was no avoiding it; he was equally as guilty. He knew every bump and callus of Gaming’s hand by heart, just from how snug and tight his fist would wrap around him. Feeling Gaming’s excitement pressing against his hip, the taste of that damn piercing on his tongue—it was all too familiar, too hot.
Just as his lips parted on a high moan, Gaming’s fingers snaked up to press into Chongyun’s mouth. Chongyun sucked obediently, wrapping his lips around him and swirling his tongue, just the way Gaming liked.
“Shh. Not so loud.”
His voice was dripping like caramel, so molten and thick, it roiled in Chongyun’s stomach. Lust, it was a sticky-sweet possession, in equal turns painful and loving, and he couldn’t ever hope to resurface.
Instinctively his hips rocked forward, swept into this baseless rhythm, where heat pulsed the most fervently. Chongyun allowed himself to be so easily maneuvered, making further room for Gaming to wrap saliva-coated fingers around them both, taking up his space, breathing in his oxygen. And it felt good.
Chongyun’s head knocked back against the wall, tipped back in prayer.
“Fuck…”
Their slick cocks rubbed against each other, pre-cum dribbling from his slit, easing the glide of Gaming’s hand around them. It was too much, way too sensitive, but Chongyun lost himself in the feeling. Skin against skin, body against body—there was no slowing down. He was so close to blacking out and he loved it.
“Feeling good?”
“Mm-hm…” Chongyun’s head was swimming. Each sigh against his lips made his face tingle, a hot flush searing his skin. “So good…”
"Good boy," Gaming whispered, kissing him softly. He hummed to himself as he admired his handiwork, eyeing Chongyun’s body without shame. “God, I could do this for hours. I just wanna play with you all day. Would you let me?”
Chongyun's eyes fluttered, half-closed. His breaths came out in feverish little gasps; he couldn't even control the sounds coming out of his mouth.
How did he get so lucky?
This instability tingled in his fingertips and made his heart burn, mounting higher and higher, so much that it hurt to breathe. His own body was wrested so easily from his control—and here he was, already on the verge of spilling all over himself.
“Close?”
“Please,” Chongyun hiccupped, though it came out more as an incoherent whine. He couldn’t recognize himself when he was like this, so needy and desperate, but this desire was beyond his comprehension. “Please, I need to cum…”
Suddenly the hot pressure was gone for a brief, agonizing moment—until a wet heat engulfed him at once, taking him all the way down to the base. The breath was promptly expelled from his lungs.
He choked, nearly bowling over. His voice cracked embarrassingly.
“Gaming—!”
Kneeling down between his legs, Gaming’s mouth withdrew with a slick pop, tongue creamy with his arousal. He looked so good with Chongyun’s dick smearing pre-cum over his face, grinning up at him all the while.
“What’s the matter? No one’s gonna see.”
His words barely ghosted like a curl of steam over his leaking dick, red and swollen. Saliva glistened on his lips. So utterly kissable.
“As long as you keep quiet, of course.”
Chongyun pressed the back of his fingers to his mouth. Suddenly, all that pent-up energy rushed to his cock, filling it out instantly. He was so hard that it hurt.
“At least give me a warning,” Chongyun groaned.
Gaming didn’t look sorry at all. Sliding wet lips up the side of his shaft, he kissed Chongyun’s leaking tip before downing him like it was his favorite meal. All Chongyun could do was uselessly quiver in his mouth, heat-drunk and wanting, as Gaming utilized that pierced ridge of his tongue that he knew made Chongyun incoherent. Sly fingers traced the line between ass and thigh, sneaking in a greedy fistful, keeping him from squirming away, and Chongyun couldn’t ever get enough.
Fuck. He needed this.
Shaky hands found their way into Gaming’s half-tied hair, but Gaming didn’t slow down, teasing his balls even as they drew tight.
“W-wait—hah, I’m gonna—”
Tears budded at the corners of Chongyun’s eyes, but Gaming didn’t let go of him for a second, coaxing him further into a haze of indulgence.
Already, sun-spots were flickering in his vision, rippling from every point of contact. Gaming’s tongue finally teased his slit—and that was enough.
Chongyun lost himself somewhere high in the night sky, forgetting to breathe in this burst of starlight sensation, in their little galaxy of two. His yang energy was overflowing past the brink of return—and he embraced the surge.
Until he crashed.
His knees buckled and he slid down the wall, his sore body trembling from the aftershocks—accelerated pulse, jittery fingers. Feeling every bit thoroughly wrecked, he only distantly registered Gaming kissing him against the wall, his lips swollen and sore, until he was drunk on the taste of his own arousal.
There was a strain in his neck. His chest hurt with every pull on his lungs, overstimulated to hell and back, yet he still felt himself melting under that magical touch, healing the parts of his body that still ached. And oh, it wasn’t fair, the way he so effortlessly reduced Chongyun to a yearning mess as soon as they parted. Wanting him, wanting more.
Fingers curled in his hair, tilting his head back. Instinctively, Chongyun stuck his tongue out.
“Here you go,” Gaming purred, with his dick in his hand, teasingly close, laying it over Chongyun’s lips. Thick and curved. “Wanna taste?”
Chongyun didn’t need directions. In spite of his inexperienced fumbling, he’d dreamed of this feeling for so long, how the thick head of his cock would fill his mouth so well, filling him to completion—how it’d make him dizzy and leak from deep inside. Chongyun kept his lips tight around the head and sucked, looking up for approval.
Breathing heavy, Gaming pulled out and jerked himself off into Chongyun’s waiting mouth. His hair stuck to his forehead with sweat.
“Yeah, like that… Fuck, Chongyun, you feel so good…”
The scent of his arousal was thick and heady on his tongue. Chongyun basked in every drop of his affection, fully immersed like it was a religious experience. This was better than his fantasies, better than anything he could’ve ever dreamed of.
Chongyun loved being lavished in praise, loved being good enough to make Gaming curse under his breath and lose his composure. He would gladly lose all of his senses forever if it meant Gaming would just keep looking at him like that, obsessed with his mouth, his touch, sweeping Chongyun’s hair back from his eyes like he was something too precious to lose. More than just a feeling.
This level of instant connection was new to him. Every second of every hour they spent together, he felt the acute desire to be closer. To be loved, cherished, wanted.
This, he felt, was dangerously close to paradise.
It was selfish of him, but Chongyun didn’t want to forget a single detail. He wanted to stay like this forever, until it was impossible to tell where he ended and Gaming began.
Was it possible to fall for someone without even knowing what love was?
Chongyun didn’t know. It hardly made a difference what these feelings were.
All he wanted was for it to last forever.
“Hey, buddy? You okay?”
All the energy seemed to drain out of him at once, and his heavy head slumped down. All his senses began to melt into each other under the veil of night; as the world started to dim and blur into one beautiful mosaic, he found himself wrapped up in steady arms and sank gratefully into the feeling. Perfectly at peace.
Unlike all the times before, this didn’t scare him at all.
It took Chongyun a while to come down from his yang-induced high. Flickers of light spotted his vision; he blinked through the fog, distracted by those fleeting clouds at his periphery. Cozied up in the cradle of the world, he slowly came to realize he was in Gaming’s lap, feeling utterly safe and adored, playing with his hair and face and piercings.
“I got those last year,” Gaming said. “A friend did ‘em for me. If you're curious, maybe we can go together sometime.”
Even in the feverish dark of night, Gaming looked just as sparkly as before. There was moon-glitter in his eyes. He looked just like a star-swept galaxy, soft on the eyes, just like this.
“Oh, hey there. Back to reality?”
Chongyun stilled, trying to refocus. Heat prickled his cheeks.
“How long was I…?”
“Just a couple of minutes. Didn't realize your yang self was this much of a cuddle-bug, haha.”
“Oh.”
It was different this time. Wrapped in this cocoon of velvet warmth, he felt too cozy to move. Somehow, Gaming didn’t seem to mind—so Chongyun let himself indulge, rubbing his head on Gaming's chest and just listening to him breathe.
The soft tumble of his laughter made Chongyun close his eyes, lost in waves of sensation. Gentle fingers stroked the back of his head. It was a rare moment of perfection. Everything was just as it should be.
He didn’t want tomorrow to come. He didn’t want this brief flicker of happiness to end.
“...Was that too much? You can tell me.”
"No. I'm just sticky,” he murmured, smiling despite himself. “And sore, thanks to you.”
Gaming massaged the aching line of his shoulders. Pressed a kiss to the crown of his head.
“Good to know,” he chuckled. “I can run a bath once we get to my place. You know, I don’t mind carrying you over. No one will be out at this hour, so don't gotta worry about that. Though, my aunties and uncles would probably adore you like this.”
“Noo, it’s too embarrassing,” Chongyun whined. Gaming rubbed his back.
“Hehe, I’m just messing with ya. But think about it. It’s dark, and no one’s here but us. What’s there to lose?”
The sound of Gaming’s voice was beautiful in the night—quiet, subdued, nothing at all like his usual self. A cool breeze from the mountains stirred through the long grass like a sea of mist, a feeling of pure bliss on his overheated skin.
In that moment of weakness, Chongyun closed his eyes, feeling them burn, overwhelmingly adored.
Forever. What would that even look like?
It felt as if he’d known Gaming his whole life. This was an instant familiarity that ran deep, like sunset clouds dipping below the ocean’s surface, that Chongyun felt illuminated in the marrow of his bones. How many years had he dreamed of this feeling?
Who had ever loved him like this? When had his life ever felt so easy?
“Sorry for the trouble,” he murmured. “I should really get going.”
Gaming wiped the drool from his lips, but instead of kissing him like usual, he just cradled Chongyun’s face in tender palms for a second or more, in this haven of honey warmth, the center of his world, filling in the cracks of a frozen heart. Irreplaceable.
And suddenly, it was all too much.
Chongyun didn’t know what he was doing here. What he’d ever done to deserve this.
“What’s with the sad face?” Gaming whispered, a hint of mischief dancing along the curve of his lips. “You really think I’m letting you go that easily?”
God, he really was beautiful from every angle. His hair was partially tied back, some strands falling over his face, a warm flush to his skin that made his eyes sparkle—that smile that kept Chongyun from even breathing properly. It was like Gaming didn’t even need to try to steal his heart.
“Come on, Yun. Help me out here. How do I get you to spend the night with me?”
He gave Chongyun his body and soul, laid bare in his palms—Chongyun, of all people, who was hardly capable of loving. How could he possibly return the favor?
“I don’t…”
Chongyun stopped. His throat was getting tight.
He told himself he wouldn’t get attached. Ever since they met on that too-hot day, he knew it was bound to happen.
So why did he feel like crying?
Without warning, Gaming rose to his feet and took Chongyun up with him, lifting him easily into a bridal carry. Chongyun nearly bit his tongue clean in half.
“Wha—hey! Put me down!”
“Sorry, buddy, I’m getting cold feet here! Just hold on tight, 'kay?”
As Gaming soared down the steep, winding stone steps, leaping with the long strides of a lion, Chongyun choked on a burst of sudden laughter—and it hit him all at once, then, how much he’d been missing all throughout his life, how much of a fool he’d been.
No one had ever made it so easy to live, to laugh, to just sit around and waste time without worrying about a thing. No one but him.
“Gaming! I’m gonna fall!”
“I won’t drop you, Chongyun,” Gaming teased, swinging Chongyun low in his arms just to make him cling on tighter, laughing freely in the night air. “Jeez, why don’t you ever trust me?”
There was no point in suppressing the inevitable. Because he’d been free-falling from the start, from that very first day, plunged into open skies with nothing but the velvet skyline to catch up to his runaway emotions, with the whole world as his witness.
It was clearer than ever before: there were no more barriers.
And so Chongyun let himself be swept into this endless whirlwind of emotion, where his body glowed brighter; every place Gaming’s fingertips stirred his skin, leaving an amorous trail in their wake; every time that vivid laughter caught his gaze, his affection grew to touch the sky in swirling waves, reflecting a world of hidden hopes, like lanterns drifting in the sky, bright and bold and beautiful.
Because this happiness was no longer temporary. Here, within this divine proximity, intimacy was no longer something to be feared.
And so Chongyun grasped it carefully within tender hands, this gentle offering, cradling it close as if he may never get a second chance.
He wanted to love, he wanted to be selfish—even if it was completely irrational. For once, he wanted to take the risk, to dive into the glimmer of possibility that someone like Gaming would stick around. That Gaming could be his.
As he let himself be carried along this makeshift path to happiness, infused with a yang-filled warmth, beloved by the world, Chongyun whispered the last anchor to his freedom:
“Why are you doing all this for me?”
With a pool of stars shining above him, he could see no brighter object in Teyvat than the breathless boy grinning down at him, his wind-swept hair all in disarray, taking him far beyond the limits of his imagination like he was something to love forever, in this lifetime and the next.
“To make you fall for me, obviously. Why else?”
All he could do was hold on just a little tighter, hiding his embarrassing tears into Gaming’s shirt, buoyed by this starlight haven and the world it promised.
This idiot.
Didn’t he know Chongyun was already his?
“Then take me home.”