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Drake Parker was known for many things at 15 years old. He was handsome, he was a great musician, and a real ladies’ man. In the last two months, he’d also been known for being step-brother to one of the dorkiest kids in school, Josh Nichols. He’d barely talked to Josh since they first met when they were in 7th grade, then suddenly he was forced to share his room with the boy after their parents got married. And honestly, Josh wasn’t that bad. Yeah, he was super weird and liked magic tricks and calls with his Grammy, but he was never afraid to be himself unless he asked Drake to help him out.
Thing was, Drake wasn’t exactly one to judge Josh for being weird. He had his own secret that he kept to himself the best he could, and it got really hard to keep it when he suddenly got a step-brother. Which was why when he started selling weird little items Josh had on HeBay, he bought three things: a portable DVD player and two gay porn DVDs. Drake may not have cared about things like school or rules, but he knew that if he visited porn sites that Josh’s computer would get serious viruses and he’d never let Drake hear the end of it. The DVD player was small enough to hide in his dresser and so were the two DVDs.
On one night when Drake was sure everyone would be out of the house (Mom and Walter were at Megan’s recital and Josh had some nerdy club activity), Drake used the opportunity to dig out the DVD player and one of the DVDs. And just to be extra safe, he put a sock on the doorknob to the bedroom so that no one would bother him. It had been a horrible moment when Walter accidentally walked in one time to vacuum and said, “There’s nothing wrong with a teenage boy… handling his business.” (That was what he got for wearing headphones to jerk off). He’d said the sock was the universal sign of ‘do not disturb’, so he and Mom would know to stay out. Walter had never walked in on him after that.
Apparently, he didn’t tell Josh what the sock meant or Josh was too busy studying to pay attention to his dad. Drake was at the best part of the porno, where the big muscly guy fucked the smaller skinny guy from behind and really rammed into him. Drake had positioned the DVD player so that he could look to the side while he jerked off and he was pretty sure he was headed for a hard orgasm. At the last possible moment, he bit into his pillow to muffle his groan as he came all over his hand just as the door opened and he heard Josh say,
“Why is there a sock on the-? OH MY GOD!!!”
Drake went from blissed out to terrified in two seconds and he screamed at being caught. Josh screamed with his hands over his face. Drake tried to cover himself up with the blankets under him, but he accidentally sent the case to the porno flying and it hit Josh in the head. God, that was even worse than his step-brother catching him jerking off! The cover of the DVD was why he’d bought it in the first place!
“Don’t look!” Drake yelled.
Josh didn’t listen, he never listened to him, and peeked through his fingers at the DVD case. Drake could see Josh’s face go as red as a tomato before he ran out of their room and slammed the door behind him. Great, now Josh knew that Drake watched gay porn on a portable DVD player that he didn’t know existed before. And knowing Josh, he’d ask a million questions when he felt like he could face Drake again and Drake wasn’t ready for that shit. He’d rather Megan have caught him or Walter or even Grammy than Josh. At least Grammy lived two hours away and didn’t know any of the kids in Drake’s school other than Josh!
It took a whole two hours for Drake to suck it up and face Josh downstairs. When he turned the corner, he saw Josh doing his homework at the dining table, which he never did. Drake coughed awkwardly to get his attention and Josh practically jumped out of his chair. Great, Josh was afraid Drake would try to hit on him or something. That was the only reason he could think of as to why Josh was so scared all of the sudden.
Drake held his hands up as a way to show peace like he saw in the movies. “I’m not gonna hit on you.”
“What… why would you hit on me? ”
“Isn’t that why you’re freaked out? The cover for that porno was pretty obvious.”
“That’s not why I’m freaked out!” Josh’s voice raised in pitch. “I just saw you jerkin’ it, man! That’d freak anyone out!”
“It’s freaking me out that you saw something you weren’t supposed to!”
“Everyone does it and we share a room!”
“THE PORNO CASE! IT HAD TWO DUDES ON IT!!”
“WHY DOES THAT MATTER!?”
Why does it matter? Drake opened his mouth to say something back… but he had nothing. Josh didn’t care, he really didn’t care that Drake had a gay porno instead of something with girls or lesbians in them. Josh was a really bad liar and couldn’t lie when his anxiety got bad, it was why Drake was the one who lied for both of them. That meant he really didn’t care that Drake could be into guys.
“... you don’t care that it’s gay porn?”
Josh didn’t say anything for a moment, then looked like he finally got it. “Oh… oh! Drake I-gosh, I’m sorry. I-you know-it doesn’t-habab-duh- spoons. ”
The fact that Josh said spoons meant that he needed a moment to get his head on straight. The guy really didn’t do well under pressure, did he? Drake knew what to do, he went into the kitchen, got the biggest block of cheese he could find in the fridge, and handed it to Josh. He remembered in biology class that day they talked about the kneading thing cats did, and he figured Josh was the same way with cheese. Josh took the cheese immediately and started to calm down. Drake had also gotten himself a soda from the fridge and sat down across from Josh while his brother calmed down. It felt like forever before Josh put the cheese down and Drake’s Mocha-Cola was half-empty.
“You okay now?” Drake asked.
“I-I think so. I guess I’m just…”
“Just what?”
Josh shrugged. “You date, like, a million girls, Drake. You’re the coolest kid in our year, but I didn’t even think you could… like boys.”
“That’s kinda the point.” Drake tapped the glass bottle on the table, trying to figure out how to explain it without getting too deep. “Boys who like boys get beat up, called names, get their lives ruined. Guys who date girls aren’t bullied badly, so I figured… taking girls out isn’t that big of a deal. I never do anything other than kiss them or hold their hands. No one gets hurt or pinned down.”
Josh actually looked upset by that. “That’s sad, man.”
Drake took a sip of his soda. “I never said it was fun.”
“Do any of the girls know you’re… you?”
Drake scoffed at the dumb question. “No. Girls spread rumors like crazy. If any of them found out, I’d be getting swirlies by the end of the week.”
“Not if you have a step-brother who knows karate that has your back.”
“Josh, you couldn’t scare a butterfly, but I love the enthusiasm.”
“No! I mean… look, I don’t care who you like whether it’s girls or boys. I’m trying to say that if anyone found out before you were ready, I’ve got your back. Even if it means getting swirlies alongside you.”
Despite that voice in the back of his head telling him otherwise, Drake knew Josh was telling the truth. It did something funny in his tummy to know that, and he smiled at his step-brother. He knew Josh had a heart too big for his already big chest, but for once, he was glad that Josh took their new family so seriously. He’d never had someone on his side with this stuff before and it made him feel too many emotions he wasn’t ready to unpack.
“Thanks, man.” Drake got up to leave, but turned back to say. “And next time you see a sock on the door-.”
“GOT IT!! Do not disturb!”
***
Josh realized his first summer living with Drake that he had sort of an on and off switch, that switch being school. He didn’t date any girls if he didn’t have to fulfill social expectations when they were on summer break. When he first learned that Drake liked boys, he felt bad for the girls who thought they were going to be Drake Parker’s new girlfriend. Josh had never had a girlfriend or boyfriend himself, but he knew what it was like to pine for someone he couldn’t have. No one ever looked at him unless he was tutoring them, and as he looked in the bathroom mirror, he knew why.
He was too fat to be attractive.
Drake could go to pool parties and not wear a shirt, but Josh wouldn’t be caught dead in just swim trunks if he could help it. Drake was 16 now and had started to work out. Josh focused more on eating healthier before he would get started on the physical aspect of weight loss. He was a great cook because of it. Kathy had liked the artwork Josh made, but she never saw him as anything other than a friend after that first date. His first kiss had been some weird attempt to make Drake jealous before Josh had accidentally outed him, for God’s sake. And during that horrible incident, he’d been more worried about hurting Drake than being used. He cared about Drake more than was strictly appropriate for brothers and he had to change into his clothes before that went down a dark spiral again.
Josh put on his robe and made his way to their bedroom. He stopped outside the door when he heard Drake giggle… with another male voice. There was no sock on the door, so Josh peeked into the room through the crack in the door and saw Drake making out with a kid they’d met two days ago at the mall - Zack or Zeke or something. He’d said he was from Michigan and was going back home in three days when they met at the food court, and Josh could tell Drake had liked him a lot . That was probably why Drake chose him instead of someone local, he wouldn’t tell everyone at school that he made out with Drake Parker.
Even though it made Josh feel like a perv, he watched Drake and the other guy make out on the couch. He’d seen Drake kiss girls, but it was never like he kissed a boy. He looked like he actually enjoyed it, ran his hands through the Zack guy’s hair and even sat on his lap. Josh’s most locked-down fantasies couldn’t compare to what he was seeing in their own room. Drake definitely liked kissing boys a lot more than he liked kissing girls.
“When are your parents getting home?” Zack asked.
“Two hours.”
“Plenty of time then.”
Then Zack’s hand dipped down and Drake’s eyes widened… but he grabbed Zack’s hand and stopped him. “Not doing that. I’m okay with kissing.”
“Oh, come on! Why else would I be here?”
“To make out? Like most people?”
“I’ll be back in Michigan tomorrow, I’m not leaving without-.”
Josh acted before he thought better of it for once. He burst into their room singing really badly and made a show of seeing Drake and Zack on the couch making out.
“ I’m sure you’ll fiiiin- Oh my god!” Josh yelled.
Both Drake and his fling stood up quickly, clearly embarrassed. Well, Drake actually looked relieved that Josh had interrupted them, Zack looked angry. Josh did his best to channel the most embarrassing thing he’d walked into four months ago, covered his eyes with one hand, and felt around the open air with the other.
“I’m so sorry! ” Josh felt along the wall to his side of the room. “I j-just need some clothes, then I’ll leave!”
He didn’t mean to trip over the step that led to his bed, but he was glad he did because it added to the awkwardness. His knees would definitely have big bruises later, even with the robe as a buffer.
“Zack was just leaving!” Drake announced.
“What?” Zack asked. “No I’m not!”
“Actually, you should. Josh has this whole ritual he does when he gets out of the shower, no one wants to see that and i-it involves… dresses!”
Josh looked over his shoulder to see Drake ushering Zack out of their bedroom. “Yeah! Need to see myself in a pretty dress before I’m ready! Helps boost my confidence!”
“A wig too! A blonde wig! Total nightmare fuel!”
Once the door was closed and Josh heard them go downstairs, he didn’t put on a dress. Instead he hung up his robe and put on cargo shorts and a t-shirt. He’d just finished putting on some socks when Drake came back upstairs looking freaked out, almost like that time four months ago when he thought Josh hated him for liking boys.
“You okay?” Josh asked. “Is he gone?”
“Yeah. He just… he said something before he left.”
“What’d he say?”
“Nothing, it’s dumb.”
Josh went into one of his karate poses. “Do I need to impose some $30 karate on that boy!?”
“No! You just came in at the right time. Thanks.”
Josh smiled. “It’s what brothers do.”
Even if said brother wanted more from the other step-brother, he’d always have Drake’s back. They were ride or die now, and even if Drake wasn’t the brightest, he knew Drake had his back in return. Josh wouldn’t trade that for the world. Not like Drake would even look at him that way as it was, both the girls and boys Josh had seen Drake date were practically worthy of being on Teen Pose. Josh was worthy of being on a poster warning of childhood obesity.
***
“You know, I thought the step-brother thing was just something people did in porn. But you actually want to live it, don’t you, Drake?”
That was what Zack had said to him before he walked out the front door. The problem was… he was right. Not about the porn part of it, but that he sort of had a crush on Josh. Drake had thought he was a total dork the first time they were officially brothers, and over the last year, Drake realized he was into that. All of the things that Josh loved that the rest of the world called lame or nerdy made him so happy. He’d think of something poetic to say about his eyes in a song later.
God, writing a song about him would be too gay. Maybe something acoustic without the rest of the band could work, then they wouldn’t accuse him of being a weird pervert. It felt dirty to think of Josh that way with all of the “that’s what brothers do” and the “hug me, BROTHA!!” bear hugs. Their parents were so happy their family was working out, and of course him being the only gay one in the house had to make it weird. And then sometimes he’d catch Josh staring at him while he was working on a new song and just so many signals that Drake didn’t know what to think. Why was it so much easier to pick up girls than it was figuring out if boys liked him?
Drake decided in a moment of complete insanity to feel out what was going on between them. He knew that Josh loved Cavemom’s and that the second film was playing at the Premier. Movie dates were the easiest thing in the world, Drake could let Josh geek out over films and afterward, he’d ask Josh if he’d like to go out again sometime. And because he was so good at pretending to like girls (which he recently found out was called straight), he could pretend like it was a totally normal hangout.
His mom dropped them off at the theater and Josh was so excited to see the movie. He just went on and on about the first one, different stories about stuff that went on when they filmed the first Cavemom’s, and the different reviews he’d seen on Rotten Oranges about it. Drake couldn’t help but smile at how excited Josh was for the movie.
“Two tickets for Cavemom’s 2, please!” Josh said to the guy at the ticket booth.
The guy gave them two tickets, and Drake paid for both the popcorn and soda. He liked to pay for what he could on dates, even though his allowance only got him so far. Josh didn’t seem to notice, and he nearly dragged Drake into the theatre to watch the movie. Thankfully, the Premier didn’t have assigned seats so they could sit next to each other wherever they wanted.
“Over here!” Josh pointed to some seats in the middle but further back.
Drake sat next to him as if he wasn’t ready to explode from nerves and handed Josh the popcorn. He had a stash of gummy worms ready in his jacket pocket when a couple on a date walked by them. They went all the way to the back of the theatre in the prime makeout spot, dark enough that no one could see them and far enough away that no one would care. Josh looked back at them and shook his head.
“I don’t get why people go to movies to make out,” Josh said.
“I know you haven’t been on many dates, Josh, but that’s what most people do when they go to a movie with their date.” Not that that’s what Drake was planning.
“They’ll miss the cinematic masterpiece of Director Kale Glowchester. Oscar nominee over a dozen times!”
“And he’s never actually won one of those shiny statues despite his box office performance.”
Josh stopped and looked at him in surprise. “You were listening.”
Drake shrugged, trying to look totally chill. “I do that sometimes.”
The theatre lights going out stopped all talking in the room and the trailers started. Drake didn’t really pay attention to the movie, he mostly watched Josh in the bad lighting. He got so excited over certain parts of the movie, and at one point, he grabbed Drake’s hand at a really intense moment. Drake did everything he could to not freak out about it, or the fact that Josh didn’t let go for the rest of the movie. For a moment, Drake didn’t care that he was in a movie theatre where anyone from their school could see them, he smiled at Josh like he put the sun in the California sky.
And that was when it hit him like a brick to the head.
He was in love with Josh.
Thankfully, before Drake could have a panic attack inside a crowded movie theatre, the credits started and the lights came on. He’d never been so thankful that a movie had ended in his life . Josh actually cheered at the end and Drake pretended to be embarrassed by it. Josh didn’t even notice and they both left the theatre with Drake silently panicking over what he should say to his step-brother. He couldn’t ask for them to go on another date, now it was between ‘do you want to go out sometime again’ and ‘I think I’m in love with you’.
“Ah, Cavemom’s 2!” Josh said. “Awesome!”
“So awesome.” Drake kept his eyes down.
“I love the way that the director used light as a symbol of redemption.”
Drake had to think of something to add to that. “I love the way the director used hot girls as a symbol of… hot girls.”
Dammit, that was the cool, straight Drake talking, and Josh didn’t look like he bought it anyway. How was he supposed to admit he’d spent the whole movie watching Josh have a fangasm over the movie and he really liked how Josh held his hand through it? He saw the opportunity to go gather his thoughts with two hot girls walking by them. He very obviously followed them with a quick “gotta fill the quota” and he detoured into the men’s room while Josh was talking to a Premier employee.
Drake paced back and forth in the bathroom as he tried to figure out what to say to Josh. Now that he was at the end of his plan, he was absolutely freaking out. He knew he loved Josh now, knew it like he knew how Megan liked to hide her stink bomb collection in the bottom right corner of her dresser. He’d never been in love before, and now that he was, he didn’t know how to handle it. The flings over the summer were one thing, so were the girls he dated as a cover, but this ? Drake had to dig his hands into the scars on his thighs to get a hold of himself.
He looked at himself in the mirror and told that voice that made him afraid of who he was to shut up. Josh wouldn’t be like Michael when he was ten, they always had each other’s backs and always would. He took one more deep breath and left the bathroom… where he found Josh putting on one of the Premier’s vests.
“Why are you wearing that vest?” Drake asked.
Josh practically beamed at him. “I work here!”
“... how long was I gone?”
***
Josh liked having a job. He always heard his dad say it was rewarding and could be a pain, but even the painful parts were worth it in the end. The only real downside was that he didn’t get to spend as much time with Drake as he normally did. Though after what happened in Cavemom’s 2, Josh needed a little space from his step -brother. He hadn’t even realized he was holding Drake’s hand until Drake let it go when the movie ended. Plus he acted extremely nervous around Josh after the fact and it made Josh think that Drake was weirded out by it.
When Josh got home from his second weekend of work, he found Drake on their couch with a bowl of nacho chips while watching TV. He was excited to show Drake what he got him as a sort of peace offering for what he did wrong at the Premier. Usually, Josh would want to complain about how the ticket printer was out of ink, the slurpee machine became a slurpee fountain, and a kid got stuck by his pants in theatre 4 (all issues Josh had to fix), but he didn’t want to mess this up.
“Hey,” Josh greeted.
Drake just grunted in acknowledgement and ate another chip.
Josh put his backpack on his bed and sat in one of the recliners with his shopping bag. “I got you something.”
Drake put the bowl on the coffee table. “What’d you get me?”
“Probably the most expensive apology gift I’ve ever gotten.” With a dramatic flourish, Josh presented Drake with, “The new iBox!”
Drake grabbed it immediately and looked at it. “No way! Doesn’t this one hold like 30,000 songs?”
“Yeah it does!” He pulled out the second one. “And I got one for myself too!”
“How’d you even afford these!?”
“I got paid yesterday! Money! So am I forgiven?”
Drake looked up in what Josh could only describe as utter confusion. “Forgiven for what?”
Josh blushed, stupid pale complexion. “For, you know, holding your hand at the… theatre.”
It was hard to say it out loud, Josh had kind of hoped that Drake would say he was forgiven and they’d never speak of it again. It was obvious that he’d made Drake uncomfortable after the fact, and he didn’t want to leave this thing floating between them. And the fact that Drake blushed as well made Josh feel even worse. He’d really messed it up, hadn’t he? After all he did after the sock and the Zack incidents.
“You think I didn’t… like it?” Drake asked.
“... didn’t you?” Josh asked, suddenly confused. “You acted weird after we left the movie and I just thought-.”
“It wasn’t about that! I was just in my head about something.”
“You were?”
“Yeah, about… who Oprah was gonna have on her show next?”
Josh smiled. “I didn’t know you liked Oprah.”
“I don’t, you just talk about her a lot. Totally unrelated to you holding my hand - which I didn’t mind.”
Josh’s brain skittered to a halt. “You didn’t mind?”
Drake shook his head.
“Oh.”
They both sat there in awkward silence for a bit, each with an iBox in hand. Drake didn’t mind Josh holding his hand. He really didn’t mind it, and it made his whole torso feel fuzzy and warm. It fed into his hopes that maybe one day, Drake could like him like that. Josh had to strain quite a bit to make sure he didn’t smile too big.
“Cool,” Josh said.
“Cool.”
***
Another day, another blonde Drake didn’t bother to learn the name of. He’d planned to slow down on how many dates he went on soon because he couldn’t keep up spending so much money like he did last year. Thankfully, she was kind of an idiot and Josh worked at the Premier so he could get Drake tickets for free. Though Drake felt bad about Josh buying him an iBox for a mess-up he didn’t even make, so Drake wanted to apologize for that.
He walked up to the ticket booth with the blonde girl and Josh smiled at them.
“Hey!” Josh said. “It’s Drake, and…?”
“And…?” Drake honestly forgot her name.
“Stacy,” Blondie said with a big smile.
“Stacy!”
“Stacy,” Josh didn’t even flinch. “Welcome to the Premier theatre, what kind of movie do you want?”
“I want candy!” Stacy went over to the snack bar, thank god.
Drake was not excited for this date, it was literally to fill the quota of pretending to be straight and Stacy was dumb enough that she thought going to the movies meant sitting next to each other to watch a movie. He honestly didn’t feel like kissing anyone with the whole being-in-love-with-his-step-brother thing going on.
“She’s a keeper,” Josh joked.
Drake rolled his eyes. “It’s for the quota. And listen, you didn’t have to buy me the iBox.”
“It was a gift, don’t worry about-.”
“An apology gift for something that was just me being an idiot. And I looked up how much an iBox costs, so…” Drake pulled out his wallet, and saw he only had four dollars. “I’m giving you $4 to start paying you back for it.”
Josh looked shocked by what Drake was trying to do. Drake had looked up the HeBay resale price online, and there was no way he could get away with selling it for double the regular price. He wanted to actually take Josh out if he could and pay him back for the totally unnecessary apology gift. $4 wasn’t much since he’d have to pay back for $150, but he’d get there. He could save up from whatever gigs he and his band made over the next two months to pay Josh back.
“Drake, you don’t have to-.”
“I want to, okay? Just take the money.”
His step-brother looked back and forth between Drake and the money, then when a very serious lady walked by, Josh got that idea look on his face. “I’ll put this toward your repayment, but why don’t you work here until you pay me back?”
“At the Premier?”
“Yeah! The pay’s pretty good for a part-time job, and I can show you the ropes.”
Drake smiled. “That’s not a bad idea.”
“We can be work buddies!”
Drake cringed. “Don’t say work buddies.”
“But you gotta ask the manager, Helen, for the job. I wouldn’t get your hopes up, though, she’s very tough and it’s not like she just hands out jobs.”
Josh pointed to the very serious lady and Drake knew if there was ever a time to try out his charms, it was now. “Hey Helen, can I have a job?”
“Sure, start tomorrow.” She walked away without even looking at him.
Drake smiled and Josh high-fived him. He never thought he’d actually get a job, but everything about Josh made him want to change things around. Like how he’d planned on sliding by school until his band finally got a record deal and they became big rock stars.
“Thanks!” Drake said.
“Not a problem. Now go fill that straight-quota of yours.”
Drake also remembered that Josh said he could watch any movies he wanted because he was an employee, so he walked over to Stacy (who still couldn’t decide what candy she wanted), she paid for her candy, and they went into the theatre. Drake was not looking forward to having an actual job, he liked playing music and video games more. On the plus side, he got to spend more time with Josh, and that was good, right? He’d quit once he got double the amount he needed to pay Josh back anyway.
***
Josh should’ve figured that Drake would be just as bad about his job as he was about his schoolwork: half-baked at best. While Josh did his best to stack the candies in the snack bar and give out tickets to customers, Drake stacked the candies askew, flirted with Helen to get out of work (was he even gay anymore!?), and sold Megan and her friends tickets to a PG-13 movie with the excuse of them being Norwegian. And somehow , it got him the assistant manager position that Josh had been aiming to get! Did the world really run on people being pretty and incompetent getting promoted? If so, Josh needed to jumpstart on his weight loss plans!
“I do all of this for him so he can do something nice for me, and now he’s assistant manager!” Josh ranted at the plumber under the kitchen sink. “He flirted his way into that position! Flirted! ”
“Buddy, I’m just here to unclog the drain,” the plumber said.
Then out of nowhere, Drake came walking in with the coveted gold vest on, more chipper than he had any right to be. It made Josh physically sick.
“Aren’t you supposed to be at work?” Josh asked.
“Well, as assistant manager, I gave myself the rest of the day off. And check this out!”
Drake got into his backpack and pulled out a wad of cash. Drake counted out $150 and handed it to him, all proud of himself. It was the same amount he’d spent on the iBox (without tax). Was Josh really supposed to be happy that Drake stole the position he was supposed to get and used the reward of doing so to pay him back?
“$150, all paid off.” From his back pocket, he pulled out two tickets. “ And I have two tickets to Quarterback this Saturday, if you’d like to go.”
That just made Josh even more angry. “Now you insult me with the pay bump I WOULD HAVE GOTTEN!?”
“I thought you’d be happy!” Drake honestly looked hurt, which made Josh feel both better and worse at the same time. “I paid you back for the iBox and I got you tickets to a great band! What else do you want?”
“THE GOLDEN VEST OF RESPONSIBILITY! I’ve been working my butt off for the position and you knew it! Then you came in with your flippy hair and charming smile and now you wear the vest that’s supposed to be mine!” He tossed the money at Drake’s chest. “Keep your money and your tickets! They’re tainted by your betrayal!” He went to his room before he did something he’d regret.
Drake had never seen Josh get that angry before. The only thing that even came close to it was if he got an A- on a test or lost a level in his game. Drake had thought he’d use what he had to get the position and take Josh out on the best first date ever. He’d never meant to hurt him like that… because he never actually paid attention to how badly Josh wanted the assistant manager position.
“Agh!” Drake started to thump his head against the kitchen wall. “Stupid. Stupid. Stupid!”
“Hey kid, please don’t hurt yourself while I’m workin’,” The plumber said. “I don’t need another incident report on my record.”
He didn’t even want to know what kind of incident this dude had on his record, so Drake went to the garage to play some really loud and angry guitar after he picked up the cash Josh threw at him.
***
Josh didn’t know what happened. One minute, he was announcing the awesome giveaway he’d come up with, the next he was on the floor covered in popcorn and people were rioting around him. He’d tried taking his Dad’s advice, but now people were beating each other up for the golden ball. God, he was so fired after this, and he managed to most likely screw up any potential feelings with Drake.
Eventually, someone called 911 and paramedics put the injured customers into ambulances. Drake and Josh sat against the snack counter covered in popcorn, and Josh tried to enjoy the little physical contact of Drake leaning against his shoulder before it was gone forever. Maybe his dad could convert the guest room into an actual bedroom and Drake could get his room back.
“So much trouble from such little golden balls,” Josh whimpered. “Helen is so gonna fire me.”
“Yeah, she is.”
“But I love this job.”
Josh looked like he was about to cry, and it made Drake feel like absolute shit. He’d wanted to impress Josh by doing what he did, not ruin his life. Working at a movie theatre wasn’t Drake’s thing, it never would be, and even though Josh complained, he went right back to work with a smile on his face. Drake, without thinking, brushed popcorn off of Josh’s hair. He wanted to do what he could to make Josh feel better.
“C’mon, you’ll get another job.”
“But I don’t want another job. What’s better than working at the movie theatre? I’ll answer: nothin’.”
Drake didn’t take his hand out of Josh’s hair, but Josh seemed too upset to notice it. This was all Drake’s fault, he’d made taking Josh out on a date his plan and didn’t even bother to think that his plan could hurt Josh instead of impress him. Josh was the one who did the hard work every day, whether it was at work, at home, or at school. He deserved to be assistant manager more than Drake did any day.
“I was only gonna be assistant manager until my next paycheck,” Drake admitted. “You deserve it more than me.”
“Then why did you scheme your way into it when you knew I wanted it?”
“Well-.”
“OKAY!” Helen screamed. “I WANT THE MORON WHO CAME UP WITH THE BRILLIANT POPCORN IDEA TO REPORT TO MY OFFICE RIGHT NOW! ”
Drake actually thought before he acted for once. He was going to quit in a week anyway, and becoming assistant manager had just made things bad between him and Josh. If he took the fall for what Josh did, everything would be put back to normal. Before Josh could get up, Drake pulled him back down and said,
“I’ll do it.”
“You’ll tell her it was me?”
“I’ll tell her it was me .” Drake stood up.
“B-but why would you do that?”
“I’ll tell you when you get home.”
Well, at least he had three hours before he told Josh the entire truth about why he messed everything up so badly. Josh would keep his job, Drake would lose his. Everybody won.
***
Drake still had the money and the tickets at home. He wasn’t sure Josh would still accept ever going out with him, but Drake hoped he would at least let him pay him back for the iBox. Josh was a really great guy, and Drake was having some kind of crisis about how he’d just walked through every day without worrying about what he did to people. For the first time ever, he actually cared if he hurt someone else when he did something. He guessed that was what it meant to fall in love with someone.
Josh got home at the same time he did every night, Mom or Walter would drive him back and forth or Josh would take the bus. Drake waited in their room, worried way more than normal and almost jumped out of his skin when Josh opened their bedroom door. Josh looked nowhere near as heartbroken as he was before, and definitely not as angry. Both good signs.
“I don’t get it, Drake,” Josh said as he put his backpack on his bed.
“Get what?”
“I’ve been trying to figure out why you’d take a job I wanted, then say you don’t want it and let yourself get fired. It doesn’t make sense.”
Drake shrugged despite how his heart felt like it would explode out of his chest. “To pay you back like I said I would.”
“It can’t be that simple.”
“Because… it’s not.” Drake picked up the $150 and tickets, better to rip off the bandaid now. “This was meant to pay you back for the iBox.” He put the cash in one of Josh’s hands. “And this was to take you out on a date.” He put the tickets in Josh’s other hand.
Josh swore he couldn’t have heard that right. “Yeah, a date, sure.”
“Yeah, a date. With you .”
“... a date? With actual romance involved?”
Drake blushed, which was very uncharacteristic of him when asking someone out in the past. It was the same expression he got when he asked a male fling to go out with him in the summers, someone he really really liked. And it was directed at Josh , who Drake had called dorky and lame since the day they met. That was for Josh! Josh started to feel downright giddy, but he wanted to be sure that Drake wasn’t playing a prank on him, or that Megan wasn’t blackmailing Drake to play a prank on him.
“Drake, if you’re messing with me right now, I swear I will never forgive you,” Josh warned. “No fudgie boos ever again!”
“Don’t bring the fudgie boos into this!” The mask of cool, suave Drake disappeared in that moment and showed only pure emotion, which looked a lot like anxiety. “Look, I acted weird after Cavemom’s 2 because when you held my hand, I didn’t realize how much I like you, Josh. Yeah, I had a crush on you before, but…”
The anticipation would probably give Josh a heart attack. “But what?”
Josh had read about the tells of someone being in love in one of the romance books Mom liked to read - yes, he liked to read them sometimes, it wasn’t a big deal. Drake’s pupils were dilated, his cheeks were pinkened with a blush, and he had trouble looking Josh in the eyes. Those were all of the signs that Drake liked him a lot more than just a crush, maybe even loved him more than a brother. But it didn’t make sense for Drake to love Josh like that when he could get any guy he wanted to fall in love with him.
That notion died as soon as Drake reached up and kissed him on the mouth. It definitely wasn’t one of those social obligation kisses, it was the same kind of kiss he gave Zack over the summer. The shock of it made Josh drop the money and tickets to the floor before his brain finally caught up. He kissed Drake back despite not having much experience kissing in general, minor lip movements, nothing spicy. Yet it managed to make Josh feel weak in the knees all the same, skin alight with electricity and all of the other strange descriptors in novels included.
Drake hadn’t thought kissing Josh would feel so right. He was scared he’d messed up at first, but when Josh kissed him back, it felt like his entire body was made of Fourth of July fireworks. He’d kissed enough guys that he liked that he knew what right felt like, and kissing Josh was like finding his favorite guitar pick in his pocket right before a show; except even better. Being in love and kissing someone was the best thing Drake had ever felt in his life.
Even though he didn’t want to stop kissing Josh, he pulled away with so much restraint. Josh tried to follow his lips, but Drake held him still so he didn’t go back to kissing him. Drake definitely wanted to make out with Josh in the future, he just wanted to fix everything first.
“You actually like me,” Josh whispered almost like he couldn’t believe it.
Drake smiled, face hot. “Yeah.”
Josh looked down at himself. “And I’m covered in remnants of popcorn butter.”
It was only that Josh mentioned it that Drake felt his hands were oily. “Not like you don’t come home smelling like popcorn anyway.”
“I don’t usually start riots with popcorn flying everywhere at work. That’s the last time I’ll listen to Dad.” Drake gave Josh a look, and Josh rolled his eyes. “That’s the last time I’ll listen to Dad for a bit. ”
Drake really hoped that Walter didn’t tell Josh to do the popcorn thing exactly. Drake didn’t take what most adults said seriously, and Josh took them way too seriously. Hopefully, he could help Josh loosen up so they could actually have fun when they went out. Since it seemed Drake hadn’t ruined everything too badly, he picked up the tickets off of the floor and asked,
“So, Josh… will you go to the Quarterback concert with me this Saturday? As a date?”
Josh smiled. “Yes I will, and I’ll pay for our drinks.”
“Good, because I was running out of cash.”
“What’d you spend all your money on?”
Drake glanced down with his eyes at the money and the tickets, and Josh nodded as he got the idea. He’d gotten the assistant manager job his second weekend in and thought he could schedule him and Josh off for the night of the concert. Stupidly, he thought he’d impress Josh with all of the managerial power he got and that he could use it for both of them. Josh was too much of a good guy to ever be impressed by that.
God, Drake would have to rethink everything he thought he knew about dating so he could be a good boyfriend to Josh.