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Walking through the familiar aisles of the supermarket, Dean can’t help but shake his head. He and Cas had been here this morning, buying groceries for the upcoming storm. The weather forecast had announced that even though the storm would only last for a couple of days, the wind was going to be quite strong, so citizens were recommended to stay indoors to the best of their ability.
Naturally, given that Dean and Cas lived outside of town, they had decided to go to the supermarket, just in case the road could get blocked in the coming days by any fallen tree or any other sort of accident. Supposedly, the storm is going to last three days at most, but still, the survival and the strategic sides of both Dean and Cas had thought that the best course of action was to drive Cas’ pick-up truck and get all the groceries needed to avoid going back to town for at least two weeks.
They had bought all kinds of food, as well as some cleaning supplies. And of course they hadn’t forgotten about getting more lube; that had been a must. But what had they forgotten? The goddamn toilet paper.
For some reason, both of them had believed that they still had tons of rolls of toilet paper in the house, but that wasn’t the case, as Dean had discovered when he had gone to the bathroom and needed to replace the roll.
So now here he is, back in the supermarket, and he can tell that the citizens of Ellensburg are starting to get nervous by the coming storm, judging by their erratic movements and the urgency some of the shoppers seem to possess. This morning, when he and Cas came in, nobody seemed too concerned about the storm yet, probably because the sky was clear and the sun was shining brightly. It was no wonder that the other shoppers gave both Dean and Cas some odd looks when they saw that each of them had a shopping cart and they were filling them to the brim; they probably thought they were overreacting. But now that the sky has been covered in dark grey clouds and a freezing wind has started to blow, the tables have turned, and everyone around Dean is filling their carts to the brim, while he is now calmly walking towards the aisle where the damn toilet paper is.
As he reaches the aisle, Dean is glad to see that there are still packages of toilet paper. If he had come here just an hour later, he is pretty sure that he wouldn’t have been this lucky.
Once Dean has grabbed two packages, which he knows will be more than enough for two weeks, he heads towards the checkout, rushing his steps, hoping that the line won’t be too long just yet. However, he stops on his tracks when he notices a stand with seeds. It hadn’t been there this morning, or Cas would have noticed. Dean knows that he should head back home soon before the roads get too busy, but Cas had said a couple of days ago that he was thinking about planting some lavender to keep certain insects away from the garden, so Dean decides to browse through the stand, looking for lavender seeds. After a while he finds it and gets one package. He doesn’t know if that will be enough for Cas, but for now, it will have to do.
The line for the checkout isn’t too long, but there are more people than Dean had hoped for. As he waits, he sees more people coming in. He can’t help but smirk; he and Cas made the right choice of coming to the supermarket first thing in the morning, even if they had forgotten the toilet paper.
When his items are paid, Dean puts the lavender seeds in the inside pocket of his jacket, feeling them against his chest. He then grabs the packages of toilet paper and heads outside. As the automatic doors open, he realizes that it is raining.
“Fuck,” Dean mutters.
The weather forecast had said that the storm was going to come tomorrow, but it seems that they were wrong. The rain isn’t too heavy, but it is the kind of thin rain that can soak you up in a matter of minutes, so Dean decides to run as carefully as possible to the Impala, not wanting to slip on the wet tarmac of the parking lot.
He reaches the Impala soon, but with both hands holding the damn packages of toilet paper, Dean struggles to find the keys. After a minute or so, his fingers find the keys and he opens the door. Desperate to get away from the rain, Dean throws the toilet paper inside carelessly. One of the packages falls onto the floor of the passenger seat while the other leans against the glove box. Dean quickly gets inside the car and closes the door, welcoming the shelter of the Impala.
Dean starts the car and immediately turns the heat on; the last thing he needs is to get a cold. As the temperature inside the car rises, Dean rubs his chilly hands and then takes a look at his clothes which are a bit damp; it could be way worse.
As he remains seated, Dean grabs his phone. Cas is probably worrying about Dean driving back home under the rain. They both know that Dean has driven under worse weather, under heavier rain, but given how the storm has arrived sooner than expected and how the news had been constantly saying to be careful in the coming days, Dean wants to let Cas know that he is on his way back home.
Knowing Cas, he is still going to worry, but at least this will ease him.
Just got out. Heading home
The response is almost immediate.
Okay. Drive save ❤
Dean smiles as he types back:
Will do, sweetheart ❤
Even if life has been quiet and safe for the two of them for these past two years, they can’t help but worry about each other. After everything they have been through, it is only natural for them to keep worrying about each other. Life has been kind to them since Dean rescued Cas from the Empty, but the fear of losing each other is still there sometimes. They have gotten better at trusting the happiness they have built together, but fear isn’t an enemy that is easy to kill. It is like an eternal fire that no matter how many times you try to put it out, there are always embers left. That is why they make sure to calm each other’s fears as best as they can. Something as simple as a text message can extinguish that fear. Or even something as simple as feeling each other’s heartbeats can work wonders too. A reminder that they are real, that they are alive, that they are safe.
Dean and Cas are still learning about how to heal, but they are healing together.
Smiling softly, Dean puts his phone back inside his pocket and then he drives away from the supermarket, ready to get back home to his husband. Thankfully, the road that leads back to their house isn’t too crowded, probably because everyone else is either already at their homes or because they are all headed towards the closest supermarket to be ready for the nasty weather. Still, Dean drives slowly and carefully, just in case some asshole who drives like shit comes his way.
As the rain softly falls, creating its own rumbling rhythm against the Impala, Dean decides to turn on the radio. He has always liked listening to music while it rains. It has always brought some sort of inexplicable comfort to him, like a feeling of inner peace. He doesn’t know why, but it has always made him feel good.
The song that plays is Ramblin’ Man, one that Dean has known since he was a little kid. It is one of the many songs that are part of the soundtrack of his childhood and also of his adulthood. Rock songs, just like the Impala, have always been one of the few constants in his life for a really long time.
He is soon tapping the wheel along the beat of the song, softly singing the lyrics of the chorus.
“Lord, I was born a ramblin' man, tryin' to make a livin' and doin' the best I can. And when it’s time for leavin’, I hope you’ll understand, that I was born a ramblin’ man.”
Dean chuckles to himself. A long time ago, that chorus had resonated with him because he had thought that he was always going to be a rambling man, was born to be one in fact. He went from one place to another, never daring to dream about spreading his roots because he had one foot already in the grave.
But now he is getting back from the supermarket, driving back to the home he and Cas have built, knowing that his husband is going to be there, like he has been for the past two years.
Before Cas came back, back when he lived in the bunker, Dean had never known if when he came back, Cas was going to be there. There was always something to do, a reason to leave. Cas never stayed for too long, and it always broke Dean’s heart. Watching Cas leave had never been easy. Now he knows that Cas left because he hadn’t felt welcome, had felt that by leaving, he was being useful to Dean. If Dean had been brave enough to ask him to stay, he knows Cas would have stayed, but Dean hadn’t known yet. But now he knows. And when Cas came back and Dean asked him to stay with him, Cas had said he would stay for as long as Dean wanted him to.
The next day, when they were sitting on the porch, Dean had shyly asked, “What if I want you to stay with me forever?”
He had been feeling the rapid and anxious beat of his heart. He had been feeling scared and vulnerable at saying those words. But Cas only smiled, and with ease, he had said, “Then forever it is.”
Dean had known Cas had meant it. And he still knows that. Even if on his worst days, a part inside of him still believes that Cas will eventually realize what a piece of shit Dean is and therefore leave, Dean knows that Cas has chosen to stay with him forever. The fear of Cas leaving is barely there anymore. His fear of abandonment still plays with his feelings on those bad days he gets every now and then, but overall, he knows Cas will remain by his side no matter what.
With that last thought, Dean makes it to their home. He is pretty sure that the moment Cas hears the loud roar of the Impala, he will look through the window to make sure that Dean has made it back. After all, Dean does the same when Cas goes somewhere with his truck. When he hears that old engine approaching, Dean always looks towards the sound, looking for that confirmation of Cas’ return.
He gets the Impala inside the garage and as the door of the garage stars to close, Dean kills the engine. He sags against the seat, glad to be home. He suspects that the worst of the storm will come tomorrow, but nonetheless, he is glad to be back home before the craziness could start.
He lets out a sigh and notices that his hand has come to rest on the spot where the vial of Cas’ grace lies hidden. He never takes it off, but he always keeps it hidden, because this is something that belongs just to him and Cas. Some of his family and friends have seen it on certain occasions, but most of the time, Dean likes to keep Cas’ grace hidden from everyone else’s eyes, because it is an intimate thing in between the two of them.
Just before he grabs the packages of toilet paper, Dean pats the hidden grace one last time and then gets out of the Impala. With his elbow, he opens the door that connects the garage with the entrance and he heads to the living room, where he knows Cas will be. As he approaches that room, he can see the back of Cas’ dark hair, and a feeling of relief and love takes over him. It doesn’t matter if he is certain that Cas will be home; seeing him always brings him so much joy.
As soon as Cas hears Dean’s footsteps, he turns his head around and dedicates him a sweet smile, the one he makes just for Dean, the one that still manages to make Dean fall even harder for him.
“Hello, Dean,” Cas greets.
“Hey, Cas,” Dean says as he rounds the couch. When he is front of Cas, Dean leans down just slightly and Cas removes the small distance so they can share a brief but sweet kiss. Then, Dean drops the packages of toilet paper next to the coffee table; he will put them in their right place later, for now, he is just going to slump on the couch next to his husband and let the warmth of their home get rid of the remaining chillness from the rain. “Next time we have another sort of crazy weather coming our way, we’re buying toilet paper. I don’t care if we already have like fifty rolls lying around; we’re still buying it.”
Cas chuckles, amused. “Of course. I would also recommend tons of lube as well. Just in case.”
“It’s good to know where your priorities lie at,” Dean teases.
With an arched brow, Cas turns to look at Dean. “I seem to recall that you told me ‘well thought’ when I added the lube to the cart.”
Dean snorts and then he playfully kicks Cas’ leg. “Shut up, you ass.”
Cas smirks and he kicks Dean back. Dean loves it when they tease each other like this, it is always so much fun. They used to tease each other back before they got together, but back then it had been different, because there was always a moment when it had felt like something more, and none of them had wanted to cross that line for fear of ruining their friendship. They had been so damn blind.
Now it comes up easily, like something they have always done. There is a lightness to those silly actions, a freedom they didn’t have before, not only because they don’t have to hide their true feelings anymore, but because their lives have a space for moments like this. The world isn’t ending anymore, and Dean and Cas don’t have to steal little moments in between one apocalypse and another to be together and be happy. Their teasing and their kisses and their touches aren’t a synonymous of goodbyes and fear of losing each other anymore; they are a way of saying I love you because they feel like that, not because it is their last chance to say that. And they are so damn grateful for getting the chance to love each other without the threat of a big bad taking them apart.
Dean, not one to give up so easily, kicks Cas again. His husband turns to look at him again, and he meets Dean’s smug look with one that is full of cool amusement.
“I will not hesitate to use my needles,” Cas threatens, showing said needles to demonstrate his point.
“As if the threat of the wrath of Heaven has ever stopped me.”
“You do have a point,” Cas admits, his serious face changing into one of amusement, but he still doesn’t let go of the needles.
Dean grins and presses a kiss on Cas’ stubbled cheek. “What were you knitting, by the way?”
Ever since they finished restoring the house, the two of them have picked up some hobbies. Cas had started with gardening, which still takes a big part of his days. Cas loves gardening and he is amazing at it. He is the main reason for making the garden look as lush and beautiful as it is, just as like he is the reason of why the orchard always gives them tasty veggies and fruits. But apart from gardening, Cas also knits. He still works some of the less complicated patterns, but everything he has knitted so far is still in one piece. Another whole different matter is his pottery hobby, which he has started learning a couple months ago. He is a bit terrible at it, but he is still learning. In spite of that, Dean keeps the ugly vases lying around different places in their house, because he is quite fond of them and proud of Cas’ work, even if the vases are fucking ugly.
As for Dean, he has found out that he really loves baking. He has always loved cooking, has loved the way he could show his love and care to his family and friends, but he had barely had any chances to bake, and he has found out not only that he is really good at it, but that he really loves it. And so does Cas, given how little Dean’s baked good seem to last in the kitchen. Apart from baking, Dean has started drawing again. He mostly uses just a pencil, but he is trying new techniques, trying to find the one that speaks to him, and so far, he seems to lean into the watercolors, but he still needs to keep practicing to get a better grip on the paint and water proportions. The same happens with his other hobby, which is playing the guitar. He knows how to play a couple of songs, but he wants to get better. Still, Cas always loves it when Dean plays the guitar, whether if Dean does it for him or if he is just jamming. No matter what Dean plays, Cas always listens with a captivated face.
It is curious to see how they both have picked up hobbies that require them to use their hands. It is nice to feel that they can do something creative, that they can use their hands to create instead of using them to destroy. It is such an extraordinary feeling to know that the callouses in their hands no longer come from holding weapons, but from holding tools and instruments. It is healing to know that they managed to break the role that they were forced to play.
“I’m trying to knit a scarf for you,” Cas answers, giving the few strands of yarn an intense look. He then grabs the beginning of the scarf and holds it close to Dean’s face. “But I’m not sure yet if I should leave it plain green or perhaps add some black or grey stripes.”
“I like this shade of green. Just leave it plain,” Dean suggests.
Cas moves the project of a scarf to Dean’s neck and then he focuses his sight on Dean’s face. After a silent moment, Cas smiles. “Yes, plain green will highlight your eyes.”
He says it so casually that Dean can’t help but blush. But that’s Cas; he can say stuff like that so effortlessly while also meaning each and every word. Dean envies that. He has gotten better at saying the things he holds in his heart, but he still lacks Cas’ easiness with words.
“Your hair is quite wet,” Cas states after he has put his knitting supplies aside. He runs his hand through Dean’s hair, spiking some of the strands.
Dean smiles as he leans against the touch. “Yeah, it was raining when I got out of the supermarket.” He tilts his head just slightly, allowing Cas to brush his hair gently. “So much for accurate weather predictions.”
Cas hums in agreement. “At least they predicted that a storm was coming.”
“If they can’t predict that shit they should get a new job,” Dean mutters, earning him an eye roll. “Think the garden’s gonna hold up?”
“Mostly,” Cas answers in a sigh. “I’m certain that some of the plants will suffer some damage, but the trees will keep most of the wind away. They have deep and strong roots, so it is unlikely that they will fall. Perhaps a branch may fall, but I think everything will be fine. Also, the tallest hedges will bring some cover to most of the flowers.”
“Oh, damn, that reminds me—” He moves away from Cas’ touch and he gets his hand in the inner pocket of his jacket, quickly finding the lavender seeds he bought. “Here.”
Cas grabs the package and then he looks at Dean’s eyes with a soft expression. “Dean.”
“There was a stand with some seeds and I remembered you wanted to plant some lavender, so I grabbed a package. It’s no big deal,” Dean explains, shrugging casually.
Cas smiles and with his free hand he cups Dean’s face. He kisses Dean sweetly and passionately, making Dean let out a soft moan. They have shared tons of kisses over these past few years and every single one they share always feels fucking amazing.
“Thank you, Dean,” Cas softly says against Dean’s lips.
“No problem, sweetheart,” Dean manages to whisper, feeling his blush spreading all over his face.
With a shy but beautiful smile, Cas pulls away. He looks at the package and even rubs his finger against the plastic in a fond way, as if Dean had brought him something really precious. Dean looks at Cas’ face, paying attention to the softness in his expression, the small but genuine smile, the crow’s feet at the corner of his shining eyes. Fuck, he is so beautiful when he smiles. There are moments like this, moments that aren’t life changing but instead are just normal moments, in which Dean falls even harder for Cas, moments in which he can’t believe how lucky he is to be alive to share this small moment with the love of his life, moments in which his heart becomes so big with so much love for Cas, moments in which he thinks, all the shit we went through was worth it just to get here.
Carefully, Cas settles the package of seeds on the coffee table. By the time his back is resting once again against the couch, Dean gets even closer to him and he wraps his arms around him. Cas is briefly surprised by the sudden display of cuddling, but he immediately holds Dean back and presses him against his chest until there is no space left in between them, clearly down for it. Dean lets out a happy sigh as he nuzzles Cas’ neck.
“Are you alright?” Cas whispers before pressing a lingering kiss on Dean’s head.
“Yeah, I am,” Dean answers. That is another thing in between them; when one asks how the other is doing, they always tell the truth. They did that way before they got together. But back then, there was always some small need to still keep part of the truth tucked away, to still act as if things weren’t that bad. Now, when things are bad, they just say it. They don’t have to hide anything from the other anymore. “You just look so cuddly,” Dean adds, tilting his head up to look at Cas.
“I do try my hardest.”
Dean snorts. “Watch out, buddy, I might end up thinking that you have a crush on me or something like that.”
“Coming from you, I wouldn’t be surprised if that were the case, after all, you were very oblivious to my acts of love in the past” Cas deadpans.
“You’re one to talk!”
Cas lets out a soft laugh and Dean can’t help but laugh too. Sometimes they are too ridiculous, but they do enjoy these silly moments.
“Hey, wanna keep cuddling while we watch something?” Dean suggests before kissing Cas’ jaw. Cas closes his eyes and makes a soft sound that Dean really loves. “I’ll even let you pick something that isn’t a western.”
Cas arches a brow. “Are you trying to seduce me, Dean?”
“Been doing that for over a decade, Cas, but it’s nice knowing that you finally got the memo,” Dean answers with a cheeky grin. Naturally, Cas glares him. “Don’t give me that look. You walked right into that one.”
There is a smile trying to find its way into Cas’ lips, but he is trying his hardest to stay mad at Dean for as long as he can. Aware that this might last for a little while, Dean decides to get rid of that frown by giving Cas a sweet and long kiss. And just as he suspected, Cas is smiling when their lips part, even if he looks a bit annoyed at himself for not holding his grumpy façade for longer.
“You are terrible,” Cas ends up saying, still making that half amused half annoyed smile.
Dean grins. “Hell yeah, I am. But you already knew that when you decided to marry me.”
Scoffing, Cas says, “Yeah, I did.” Then he moves his hand until he cups Dean’s cheek. Gently, his thumb caresses Dean’s freckled skin. He gives Dean that soft and full of love look that still manages to make Dean’s heart skip a beat. “I do love you, though.”
“I know,” Dean whispers, then he grabs the hand cupping his face and he presses a kiss on Cas’ palm. He can feel his pulse, a reminder that he is here and alive. “I love you, too, by the way.”
Cas grins, beautifully, and Dean can’t do anything else but to remove the small distance in between them and kiss him again. He really loves kissing Cas, and so does Cas, judging by how he chases Dean’s lips the moment their first kiss ends. Dean can’t help but make an amused sound against his husband’s lips.
“If you wanna make out instead of watching something, I’m all in,” Dean comments after their passionate kiss.
“As tempting as that sounds, I have plenty of times to make out with you, so I can’t let go of this rare opportunity that allows me to watch something that isn’t a western,” Cas admits with a serious face.
For a moment Dean thinks about replying with a sassy comment, but in the end, he ends up laughing hysterically because Cas does have a point. They might watch other stuff that aren’t westerns, but Dean does love that genre and Cas has to deal with it way too often.
Cas soon joins Dean’s laughter. Dean doesn’t know for how long they laugh, but it feels so damn good to just be able to laugh about stuff like that, to be together sharing this happiness in a home they built together.
As Dean kisses Cas, still feeling the last remains of his beautiful laughter, Dean feels so damn grateful for having a place where he and Cas can spread their roots together.