Chapter Text
The weeks Noiz spent in the hospital were calm, almost too quiet. On occasion, he would wake up in the middle of the night after a nightmare, unable to sleep afterwards. Or more like, he didn't want to fall asleep because he knew that if he did, he'd be back in that same room that had haunted his dreams for years.
Aoba would always notice when he'd had nights like that, of course he would. Despite how airheaded he could seem at times, Noiz had also come to notice how observant Aoba was, often noticing small details about Noiz even he himself had never realised. Maybe Noiz just wasn't good at pretending he was alright. He was sure that even if his behaviour gave nothing away, his appearance must have. There was no hiding the dark circles underneath his eyes, a stark contrast with the paleness of his skin (his complexion had started to get a little more color, much to Aoba's relief, but it was still closer to paper white than anything else).
Whenever Aoba walked through the hospital door, the atmosphere would immediately change. It would go from gloomy to something different, something Noiz wasn't quite sure what to call. Cheerful was what his mind supplied him with, but even that didn't seem to match the sheer magnitude of what a single smile could do. And after particularly bad nights –the ones when Noiz just couldn't wake up no matter how hard he tried- they'd go through the same routines that had almost developed into tiny rituals by now.
Aoba was soft and warm when Noiz's bent fingers traced over his cheeks and down to his jaw. It was a sensation Noiz had never even thought he'd be able to feel one day. Aoba was sitting next to his bed, leaning forward so Noiz wouldn't have to stretch himself too far out, his hands braced against the edge of the hospital bed to steady himself. He was still as Noiz's hands moved, carefully touching whatever bare skin he could reach. Face, arms, and every once in a while he'd dip down to reach for his hands, the texture smoother than his own.
He loved touching Aoba, really. It grounded him to reality, something that was increasingly difficult for him with every passing day. He knew Aoba knew, which was most likely the reason he never pulled back even when his face was flushed red with embarrassment every time their eyes met. Just the simple fact that Aoba made the effort to come see him each day was enough to light something up inside him.
He wasn't sure what to call the feeling, per se. The feeling of something warm bubbling inside his chest, wrapping around his heart just to suffocate him with the intensity of it all. He didn't know why, whenever he woke up at night, just the simplest thoughts about Aoba helped him through the terror and loneliness. Noiz had never been dependant on another person, had never planned on doing so, but now he'd found his day started when Aoba entered his room and ended when he left, leaving behind just enough warmth for Noiz to survive another day.
He didn't know what it was, but he hoped Aoba would help him when the time came.