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“Dada! Dada!”
“Ya heard that, daddy?”
“Loud and clear, my beloved.”
“Aurora wants you back by dinner time! Ya better not miss her blowing her birthday cake!”
“I wouldn't miss it for the world.”
Stopping in front of the ship's monitor, Boothill studies the planet displayed on the screen, his daughter perched on his hip. His little rascal of a girl had just turned one, and as she continues to grow before Boothill's eyes, the ranger watches on in awe as she blossoms into her own person - rambunctious, clever, and endlessly curious.
Not unlike his Aurora from before.
Boothill's heart is torn between fondness and aching as the toddler reaches out towards the screen, her stubby fingers tracing the swirling watercolour-like streaks adorning the planet Argenti is currently in, as if studying the patterns herself. His Aurora from before loved to explore the world around her, using her five senses to understand her surroundings. For a toddler, she loved the outdoors, and would always find a way to get her father to take her on adventures with him.
At least in this life, we get to explore the world beyond the stars together, don't we? Boothill thinks, nuzzling the crown of her unruly red hair.
“Boothill? Are you still there?”
“Ah– sorry darlin’, my mind just drifted someplace else. Be back soon, ya hear?”
“Are you sure you're alright? Are you not in any sort of pain?”
“Stop worrying. ‘Course I'm fine.” Boothill rolls his eyes, sensing the beginning of Argenti's worrying spiel through his phone.
“My love, if you feel even the slightest hint of pain, just say so, and I'll come back right away, alright? Just say the word.”
“The only one in pain will be you if you don't get ya butt here for Aurora's birthday!”
A fond, exasperated sigh. And then, “Copy that. See you soon, my doves.”
Once Argenti has hung up, Boothill pockets his phone and shifts Aurora higher up his hip, clicking his tongue when he couldn't quite hold her with both arms, what with his stomach in the way.
After finding out that Boothill had been carrying twins, the doctor had to force him to make adjustments to his body - namely the hard outer plating covering his entire front - but that was after giving both Boothill and Argenti an earful for expecting again almost immediately after Aurora.
Boothill had to laugh every time he thinks of that day - he'd never seen the Knight of Beauty cowering before anything or anyone until meeting the doctor herself. It is one of the memories he'd never let his poor lover live down.
With the doctor's help, what was once solid alloy plating moulded flush against his body is replaced with a sort of synthetic, skin-like fibre, stretching to accommodate his ever-growing womb. Like this, Boothill's unique condition is all the more apparent, and though this reassures him that his babies would not suffocate in his once-solid body, it doesn't change the fact that he isn't too happy with his physical changes.
He couldn't lie and say he doesn't miss showing off his slender, agile physique. He's proud of his baby bump and still refuses to switch out his crop top for anything else, but there had been times he'd wished he could run around as wildly as he used to.
In those moments, Boothill is profoundly grateful to have Argenti by his side. The knight is an endless well of praise and encouragement, effortlessly dispelling even Boothill’s deepest insecurities with a few sweet words - especially now that the babies are very close to term, resulting in an extra cranky, snappy cyborg. With a ticking time bomb as a lover, Boothill is surprised that the knight is still as patient as he's ever been. Sometimes it feels as if Argenti is way too good for him.
“Bubba? Babubba?” comes Aurora's voice, pulling him from his spiralling thoughts. She pats his cheeks with her chubby hands and Boothill takes one of them, bringing it to his wide-open mouth. Aurora squeals with laughter as Boothill feigns eating her hand.
Right. When it comes to reassuring Boothill, their daughter is Argenti's greatest contender. She may barely be able to form a sentence, but her charm and sensitivity to his emotions are qualities she has undoubtedly inherited from Argenti.
“I'm alright, ya little rascal.”
“Bubbabu!”
“Yeah, wubaboo!”
Boothill takes his daughter to the spacious hull, which had recently been redesigned as the family's living area. With a heavy sigh, he lowers himself onto a couch and puts Aurora down onto the plush mat beneath them. The baby squeals gleefully upon spotting her toys scattered all around the mat, and immediately sets on her mission to retrieve them all while Boothill fondly watches her crawl about.
Time seems to creep by like this, as Boothill takes in the space he built together with Argenti. The One and Only had undergone significant changes since Boothill and his daughter moved in. Once practically a bachelor's den, it is now filled with signs of domesticated life - cosy, babyproofed furniture, soft throw pillows, and an array of toys scattered about. Walls are adorned with family photos and Aurora's drawings, and shelves that once held Argenti's gadgets and memorabilia from his travels now burst with children's books, games, and stuffed animals.
Boothill had always known Argenti to be a good and honourable man, and the idea of taking advantage of that had never sat right with him. He'd been fully prepared to raise Aurora on his own - alongside the babies in his womb he’d discovered not long after his departure from the Astral Express. After all, he'd managed fine as a single father before, he could do it again. But Argenti had been persistent, incorrigibly so. The knight had to practically kidnap him into the renovated ship and show Boothill how eager he is to raise his children with him, and prove to him how capable a protector and provider he is (not that Boothill isn't as capable, Argenti had hastily added).
And so, Boothill had taken one look at the newly-bought toys, the crib, which Boothill knows Argenti had carefully and lovingly crafted, and finally to Argenti, down on one knee and looking up at him with those darn puppy eyes, and Boothill had finally relented, much to the knight's delight. As much as Boothill denied it, however, the whole thing was admittedly endearing to watch.
The following months since then had been quite an adventure. They stop at a planet every now and then to find bounties and save the occasional poor fella from trouble. It's pretty much the same gig for Boothill, except he doesn't quite do anything alone anymore with Argenti glued to his side. Argenti is magnificent in fatherhood as he is with everything else, and it unnerves Boothill how attractive he is juggling as a parent and a protector at once.
With so much change happening in his life, Boothill couldn't help the pit in his chest at the thought of forgetting his old life, his old family. Despite how perfect his family is now, nothing could quite compare to that time, surrounded by his parents, his brothers and sisters, and Aurora, with her hair a gorgeous shade of ebony instead of red.
Boothill inward curses, clutching his stomach, where he could feel his unborn children roll about in his womb.
Is he a bad person for clinging to the past?
Taking out his phone again, he scrolls through his messages, bypassing certain ones from those nosy kids at the Astral Express, and lets out a ragged breath when a notification from his calendar pops up.
2 system days till anniversary, it reads.
The painful reminder stares up at him.
Of course.
That's why this dreaded feeling haunts him these days.
How could he forget her anniversary? So occupied had he been with this new life he'd built with Argenti, that he'd completey forgotten how close his daughter's birthday is to… her death day.
Boothill feels faint all of a sudden.
For years, he would spend this period of time at his home planet - or whatever is left of it, gathering a bouquet of wildflowers and replacing the dried ones at the shrine he’d erected at the ruins of his old home. He'd sit by the stone, run his hands through the crude engravings on it, and shine it meticulously as he could as he mourns them silently. It probably stands there now, gathering dust and ashes, abandoned and forgotten.
Aeons, what a rotten being he truly is.
His phone slips from his fingers before he knows it, landing onto the rug below it with a dull thud. He utters a curse, though he makes no move to get it. There's already tears blurring his vision, and he's cursing himself for letting something so precious slip from his mind–
Something hard is pressed into his hand. Boothill's breath hitches. He blinks through his tears, confused when he finds his phone back into his hands.
And then a pair of small hands join his own, pressing his phone firmly onto his palm. When Boothill looks up, it is to the sight of Aurora, grinning up at him with her gap-toothed little smile.
“Bubbaboo,” she coos, nudging the phone in his hands.
“Aurora…” Boothill murmurs. “When did ya…”
He glances at her, then to the spot she stood a moment ago.
“Hold on. Did… did ya just walk over to me? To return my phone?”
As if to affirm this, she squeals loudly, holding her arms up towards him. “Bubbaboo! Bubbaboo!”
“Oh, sweetheart,” Boothill huffs out a watery laugh. He picks her up and cuddles her against his chest. “Oh, baby. Papa's… papa's havin’ a wubbaboo, alright. But you…”
He giggles as Aurora turns her head and plants sloppy kisses against his cheek, where his tears begin to fall in rivulets.
“Darlin’, why don't you show papa again, huh? Show him how you walk'em little legs!”
Setting her down slowly, he walks backwards, and sure enough she follows after him with slightly shaky legs.
Oh. Boothill thinks. Oh.
All of a sudden he's back in the farmhouse again, his arms outstretched towards his little girl as she takes her first steps. Bathed in golden light, her hair formd a halo where sunlight shone through it, making her look like a little angel. That had been a few days before everything had been razed to the ground. Before everything was gone.
Boothill blinks again and finds Aurora in his arms, her tousled red hair filling most of his vision.
Oh.
Oh right. But Aurora's still with me. Aurora never left.
“That's my little girl,” Boothill smothers kisses all over her chubby face. “That's my Aurora.” He breaks into sobs then, lowering to the ground and rocking them both.
“Forgive me for being so ungrateful, darlin’. All this time, papa had been lookin’ for something that doesn't exist anymore, when all he needed was right here.”
Aurora merely coos at the motion of being rocked, content to be in her father's arms.
“Thank you… for letting me experience this once more.”
That's how Argenti finds them moments later. He arrives uncharacteristically harried, panting slightly in his haste to find them when he hears crying from the ship's hatch.
“Beloved? Are you alright? Why're you on the floor?” Argenti lowers to a knee beside them, checking over them both, before sighing in relief when he sees that they are fine.
“She walked,” Boothill turns to him, his face a teary mess despite his wide toothy grin. “Baby, our little girl walked!”
His hair is pasted onto his wet cheeks, and Argenti tucks the ranger's hair behind his ear, his smile fond. “Oh? Is that so?”
“Yeah. Wanna show us again how it's done, Aurora?”
Argenti moves across the room and crouches down, holding his arms out towards the little girl. Aurora is already giggling at the sight of her daddy, her chubby arms and legs kicking and thrashing about excitedly as Boothill sets her onto her feet.
“Oh, look at that! Our little lady is so fast already!” Argenti laughs. His voice is gentle as he encourages her on, chuckling as she falls onto her bottom, only for the child to recover quickly and closing the distance between them.
“That's my girl!” Argenti catches her finally, and with a flourish he swings her in his arms, both the knight and child's laughter mingling together to make the most beautiful sound Boothill has ever heard.
Boothill couldn't help it - he lets out sob, trying to muffle it with a forearm.
“Sweetness, come here.” An arm wraps around his waist, guiding him to his feet. Argenti pulls him closer against him - or as much as he could with Boothill's bump in the way, and leaning in, he kisses his tears away.
“How are you feeling?” Argenti asks softly as Aurora babbles happily between them.
“I— I'm feelin’ a lot of things,” Boothill ducks his head into Argenti's neck. “But they're mostly happy.”
“I'm glad, my beloved. I'm very much happy as well. For the both of you.”
“Dadada!”
“Yes, dada saw ya, didn't he?” Boothill pinches the baby's cheek, and the baby squeals with laughter as she is nuzzled by both her parents.
The dining area, once used for solitary meals, now has a larger table where the family can gather for shared meals and conversations. Boothill remembered seeing the small, empty space when he’d first stepped into The One and Only, teasing the knight for the vow of celibacy the knight had lived by. Now, Boothill isn't one to tease no longer, now that he's here with him, celebrating their daughter's first birthday, with a couple more of his brats due to be born soon.
It's a bittersweet feeling.
He's still getting whiplash from how sudden everything turned out for him, despite living a long history of lives. Boothill thinks he'd lived enough to experience a hundred lifetimes, if anything. An endless cycle of living and dying, loving and losing, and the worst part is that the familiarity of it doesn't dull the pain. He used to wonder if there's an end to this cycle, or if he's doomed to repeat it until he can no longer distinguish one life from the next.
Yet, in these moments between one breath and the next, watching his lover and the child they'd make together in a ship they'd call a home, he thinks some things have begun to shift - promise that maybe, just maybe, this time will be different.
This time, he’ll allow himself to believe in a future where the cycle breaks, and that in this life, he could begin anew, free of guilt or regrets.
As Boothill gets up to fetch Aurora's formula milk warming up on the kitchen counter, a feeling akin to a stab radiates from his lower abdomen.
A feeling Boothill finds all too familiar by now.
Behind him, laughter resound as Argenti and Aurora take turns feeding each other cake, their antics leaving a cakey mess on the table; and both them are oblivious to the little plight Boothill is in.
Boothill suppresses the urge to keel over, trying not to draw attention from them both. Grimacing, he puts a hand on his stomach, rubbing his bump.
“Couldn't come at a better timing, can ya?”