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The first time Ryan had shared the message with Brendon, Pete had been there to make sure that everything went as planned. He trusted Ryan, but Ryan was young, maybe too young, to handle the responsibility that Pete gave him.
But he had been so willing, so accepting that Pete may have faltered for a few moments too long. This may have been a fatal mistake, a grave err in judgment. Backstage at a small venue in Vegas, Ryan had been so eager to accept everything that Pete was promising him. More eager, even, than Patrick had been. Pete had looked into Ryan’s innocent eyes, slightly shadowed by the smoke that swirled in the room between them. He saw something in those eyes, something that he wanted, something he craved. Though Ryan’s eyes were a little shaky, they held something important. Desire. Desire for all that Pete could give him, all that he could teach him, and desire to do anything that Pete asked of him.
Pete knew that he was asking a lot of someone as young and inexperienced as Ryan but Pete saw the power that he had over him. He felt his control radiate through his fingertips pressed into Ryan’s sharp and trembling hipbones. Pete did not trust many people, but he trusted Ryan, as his eyes slid shut and he exhaled, satisfied that his message was in good hands.
Pete had taken a dangerous chance with Ryan, and he wasn’t going to be careless anymore. So when Ryan wanted to take the message to Brendon, Pete insisted on being present. It was his message after all, his fate, and as much as he knew Ryan would protect it, he could not afford to take chances like this.
“We need him Pete. You know that I would do anything for you, but I can’t do it alone. I can’t reach as many people as he could. Kids listen to my words but they look at him when they do. They listen to him, not me.”
Brendon would be harder to convince. What Pete saw in Brendon’s eyes was not something he had seen in Ryan’s. Strength. This was an obstacle that they would have to overcome, and Pete would overcome this because Brendon’s strength was something that he needed. As much as he needed Ryan’s desire, he craved Brendon’s strength, his passion. Brendon would be a much greater tool than Ryan could ever be.
When it was time to convert Brendon, Pete let Ryan be the one to do it because he knew that Brendon would not accept it from anyone else. Brendon would not let anyone change him except Ryan. When Brendon looked at Pete, Pete saw fire and energy. When he smiled at Pete, he knew that Brendon’s smile just might be his greatest messenger. But when Brendon looked at Ryan, when he smiled at Ryan, Pete saw something quite different, something he could not place a word on. Whatever it was, it was the reason that Ryan had to be the one to do it.
~~~~~~
In February, Pete got a call from Jon. He had not anticipated this. This was the first time he truly regretted trusting Ryan so blindly.
“Pete, there might be a problem...I think he loves him. Like he honestly, truly, is in love with him.”
“You mean Brendon?”
“No, well yeah, but no. Ryan. I mean Ryan loves him.”
“Jon, how did this happen? Love isn’t a part of this. Love is in fact contrary to all of this. How is this possible? How did Ryan misunderstand? How did I let this happen?”
“Jon, tell Ryan that we are going out.”
This was not going to continue. Pete knew he had to take care of this immediately. This may be the biggest threat to this plan. Bigger than Gabe or Gerard. Though Pete did not agree with their methods, at least their message was not contrary to his. They could be convinced, spun. But these two, these fucking kids. This could not happen.
Pete had been right about Brendon. Brendon had managed to reach more people than he could ever have imagined. It had been amazing. Pete would have been intimidated by Brendon’s power except that it was still Ryan’s words that Brendon preached, his words.
But now. Now, Pete and Jon had to ensure that this would not go on. They would refresh Ryan’s memory. Or maybe they would cloud Ryan’s memory to the point where Brendon wouldn’t seem so important anymore. They would take him out, they would introduce him to people. They would remind him how important he was, how important they were. They would convince him that the pretty blonde girl would look amazing next to him and more people would listen to him because they would be jealous of all that he had. They would toast their drinks to how much Ryan didn’t need Brendon anymore because they were his words after all and Brendon already had them memorized.
This seemed to work on Ryan but no matter how hard he tried, Pete could not get through to Brendon. After a short while, Pete gave up trying because he realized that this was just the way he needed Brendon to be. Broken. Sad. This, tears, heartache, these were part of the message.
~~~~~~
Pete allowed his youngest messengers to leave for the mountains on their own only because he was convinced that he had Ryan back. His Ryan. The one that would do anything for him. And also, he had Jon there, just in case.
Pete had heard Ryan ramble on about his fairy tale album, but he didn’t miss the point that it was a realistic, dark fairy tale. And yes, this would work. Pete would allow him to write this. He trusted him.
Walking down the stairs in the cabin toward the rehearsal space, Jon heard noises. Were they fighting again? As he reached the door, he saw, that no, they were not fighting.
“Brendon, you’re so beautiful.” Ryan’s hands ran through the sweat on the singer’s chest and came to rest on his cheek. He rocked slowly up and down. Brendon slid in and out of him, fingers tracing ribs as he looked up at the writer from the floor.
“Fuck, Ryan.”
“We can’t tell anyone about this Brendon, about us. It can’t be like it was before. Do you understand?”
“Yes.”
Jon did not want to see this. He did not want Pete to think he had failed. He did not want to have to tell Pete about this. Maybe he wouldn’t. This was just sex. They weren’t really doing anything wrong. Jon would let this go. He would stay quiet. He wouldn’t even tell Pete about the new song that they were going to perform.
~~~~~~
Pete heard about the performance. Ryan had never played this song for him. This was devastating. Pete was going to have to handle this very carefully. He could not let this be the end and he didn’t really want to have to get rid of them. They had been and could be so very useful to him. But if he had to, he had to.
Before Pete could even decide what to do, something wonderful happened. His followers came through for him. Now, he realized how powerful his message really was. They hated it, this new song. They turned against Ryan and his contrary words. They did not want to hear about love. It had no place. This was not the message they wanted to hear. Pete did not even have to do anything about it. His message had done it for him.
Ryan was destroyed. He had no choice but to give up. If no one was going to listen to his words anymore, there was no point in saying them. Fairy tale album out the window. It was better than Pete could have dreamed. Pete made sure that Jon knew what needed to happen. Jon stayed with Ryan for a while and they wrote songs together. They would play guitar and Jon would let Ryan sing. They did not need Brendon.
When it was time to perform the songs that they had written, Brendon and Spencer were not given any time to actually learn them and as a result their performance faltered. But Ryan didn’t care. People were listening to him again.
After the show, Jon and Ryan went out to celebrate. When they got back to their hotel, Jon dropped Ryan at the door to the room that he was sharing with Brendon and crossed the hall to his own room. Ryan’s head was throbbing so loudly when he got into bed that he could barely hear Brendon crying from across the room. The chemicals swimming through his head didn’t allow him to dwell on it long before they drowned him to sleep.
Jon woke up to a message from Pete.
How did everything go last night?
He typed out a response before falling back to sleep.
Perfectly.