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Jesus woke up with Judas curled up against him and a peculiar stiffness pressed against his hip. He was lying on his back with Judas’s arm draped over his chest. Turning his head slowly to the side, he found Judas peacefully asleep with his head pressed against his shoulder, a subtle furrow in his brows making itself present every few seconds. Jesus couldn’t help but smile at the sight, and he stretched his neck a bit to place a soft kiss right between those ginger eyebrows.
Judas had always been a heavy sleeper compared to Jesus. And unlike Jesus, who was an early morning riser, Judas would often sleep well into midday. Jesus was always happy for the privilege of getting to watch him while he slept in the morning light that filtered through the tent.
But this morning was a bit different. Judas was aroused, Jesus could feel it. The evidence was pressed against his thigh. He wondered idly what Judas was dreaming about as he admired his features fondly for a while longer. His eyebrows twitched ever so slightly, his lips were slightly parted and his breaths grew increasingly ragged. Jesus shifted carefully so he could slip a hand into Judas’s hair, scratching his scalp gently while he slept. Judas’s hips seemed to move of their own accord, rutting against Jesus.
A slight groan made its way past Judas’s lips, and in the next moment his eyes blinked open. His eyes met Jesus’s own with an intensity Jesus had never seen before. But the emotion was gone just as soon as it’d appeared, when Judas seemed to fully regain consciousness and practically jumped away from him as if he’d just received an electric shock.
“Oh shit,” Judas said, his face flushing red with embarrassment faster than Jesus had ever seen it do before. “I’m so sorry, Jesus.”
Jesus watched as Judas rushed to hide his erection under fisted bedsheets.
“It’s okay, Judas,” Jesus said warmly, before frowning. “Don’t look so frightened.”
“I didn’t mean to—“
“You couldn’t have. You were asleep.”
Judas went even redder than Jesus would’ve thought was possible. Judas averted his gaze and gave a stiff nod.
When Jesus shuffled closer to place a hand on Judas’s shoulder, he was glad to feel the tension ease from his shoulders. He placed a kiss on Judas’s forehead while Judas kept his gaze firmly fixed on the bed.
“Come on, come back to bed,” Jesus told him.
Judas looked up at him with confusion and hesitated. He looked down at where he was hiding his groin beneath the sheets and then back up at Jesus’s face, as if he was waiting for Jesus to understand the slight problem with this endeavor.
Jesus simply gestured at him to lie back down, like Judas’s situation posed no problems at all.
Judas indulged him wearily, and they lied back down, side by side.
Jesus turned on his side to watch Judas as he lay with his eyes now firmly fixed on the ceiling. He brought a hand up to his face to softly bring his gaze toward him. Jesus hated the worry he found written all over his face.
“Can I kiss you?”
Judas nodded despite being clearly baffled, and Jesus leaned in to kiss him softly. When he pulled away, Judas looked like he was warring with himself.
Jesus pointedly glanced at Judas’s lower half before looking back at him. “Is it okay if I touch you?”
Judas exhaled harshly. “Jesus, you really don’t have to do this.”
“No, please,” Jesus said. “I want to.”
He watched as Judas closely examined his face.
“I don’t want to make you uncomfortable,” he finally said.
“You wouldn’t,” Jesus replied simply. He hoped Judas could tell his earnestness from his eyes. He sighed. “Would you please relax, Judas? I promise everything is okay.”
Judas nodded, but they remained in silence for a while as they waited for the tension to ease.
Jesus was the first to break the silence.
“I was watching you sleep,” he confessed. “You looked so beautiful engaged in whatever it was that you were dreaming.” He paused for a bit before saying, “I genuinely think I would enjoy making you feel good. If you are comfortable with that, of course.”
There was another moment of silence before he added: “But I could also just step out right now and give you some time alone, if that’s what you’d prefer.”
“No,” Judas replied hastily. Then he repeated himself, softer this time. “No. It’s just—“ He rubbed a hand over his face. “Are you sure you want to do this? You aren’t just doing it because you think it’ll make me happy?”
“I want to do it,” Jesus assured him.
Judas contemplated this for a few seconds. After a moment, he seemed to have come to a decision.
“Will you just promise you’ll tell me if you’re uncomfortable at any point?” Judas told him. “We can stop whenever you want.“
Jesus smiled and kissed him before reassuring him: “I promise.”
Judas smiled back. He looked a lot more at ease now that they’d talked about it.
He twisted around to lay on his side.
They stared at each other’s eyes for a moment, and when Jesus smiled he was happy to find the expression mirrored on Judas’s face. Then Judas met Jesus’s lips for a kiss, which Jesus returned happily.
It only took a moment before Judas’s kisses grew more passionate and heated, and Jesus found himself strangely delighted in his evident desperation and need. He let his hand rest on Judas’s hip for a moment as they kissed, before letting it slide a bit further down.
He snuck a hand between them to cup Judas’s hardness through his pants and savored the strangled whimper that slipped past his lover’s lips.
Judas's hips seemed to rut against him of their own accord, seeking the warmth of his palm and needing the friction. Jesus chuckled softly against Judas’s lips, as the man struggled to keep his breathing steady and his hips still, embarrassed to be so needy.
A broken look overcame his face when Jesus pulled away to reach for something on the side of the bed. Jesus made quick work of retrieving a small bottle of oil and rushing back to kiss that worry off of Judas’s features. “Don’t worry, Judas. I’m not going anywhere,” he promised.
Judas nodded sheepishly, embarrassed for that sudden moment of panic and also evidently filled with relief at Jesus’s promise.
Jesus smiled at him, then placed a gentle hand on his shoulder. “Lie back down for me.”
Judas swallowed thickly and nodded as he let himself be pushed back onto the mattress. With Judas lying on his back, Jesus shifted closer to him, resting on his side, propped up by his forearm. He gazed down at Judas, who was looking up at him with a stunned look on his face, his eyes wide and his lips pressed together. He looked like he could hardly believe his luck, afraid to move or even breathe as if it would break a spell.
Jesus leaned down for a soft kiss, and when he pulled away, Judas chased his lips, but Jesus was just a little too far away for him to catch them. Jesus watched as Judas slowly blinked his eyes open, mouth still agape, and then let his head fall back on the bed defeated.
Jesus chuckled fondly. “You look beautiful like this.” Desperate, he thought to himself, but didn’t dare vocalize it for he knew Judas would resent the remark, if just for a moment.
He uncapped the bottle and spilled some oil onto his hand, doing his best to spread it over his palm single-handedly. He observed Judas tracking the movement with his eyes in a trance, appearing increasingly out of breath. Jesus studied his face closely as Judas’s gaze followed the path of his hand moving down until it reached his waistline and gently snuck beneath Judas’s boxers.
The moment Jesus’s hand wrapped around him, Judas choked on a moan. Jesus watched as he closed his eyes and threw his head back on the pillow.
“Fuck,” he gasped.
Jesus stared at him, hand unmoving, as he waited for Judas to start breathing again. He tried to gauge exactly if the reaction was positive or negative.
“I didn’t expect that,” Judas said in his next shaky exhale.
“What?” Jesus inquired softly.
“For it to feel this good,” he said. Jesus's hand was so warm around him, it had caught Judas by surprise how good it felt. It didn’t normally feel this good, this simple act of just having a warm hand wrapped around him. Yeah, it’d been a while, but still. Perhaps he’d just gotten himself so worked up about this. He had no idea why his body was reacting this strongly.
Then Jesus twisted his hand around him, and Judas lost it. Either the man had a magic touch or Judas had just gone insane, but this felt much better than it had any right to feel.
Jesus began a slow steady rhythm of moving his hand up and down around him. He watched Judas’s face, with his eyes screwed shut and his lips parted, as he jerked him off slowly.
“Does that feel good?” he asked him.
Judas nodded eagerly. “Yeah,” he exhaled. “Feels amazing.”
Jesus kept his rhythm steady, watching Judas for a few more seconds. Eyes still closed, chest rising and falling rapidly.
“Look at me,” he finally said.
Judas opened his eyes and stared back at him. Somehow, the eye contact seemed to make Judas go even redder. And there it was, in those mesmerizing blue eyes with the blown up pupils... There was that same intense look Jesus had seen when Judas woke up and looked at him.
Lust.
It was intoxicating.
“You’re really enjoying this, aren’t you?” Jesus told him. He’d been struggling to read him before, but now he could see it clear as day. And a strange feeling of satisfaction washed over him. He was making Judas feel this way, bringing him pleasure. He had the upper hand. And he liked it.
Judas looked like he was about to retort something, but then Jesus ran his thumb over the tip of his cock and the remark died on his lips, replaced by a broken sob.
He quickened his pace, moving his hand faster around him and watching for Judas’s responses mesmerized. The twitch in his eyebrows, the clench of his jaw, the distant and dazed look in his eyes. He brought the arm he was resting on closer to Judas’s head, just enough to be able to caress his forehead and push stray hairs back away from his face. Then he leaned close to place kisses on his cheeks and below his ear, trailing kisses along his jaw and then down his neck. And Judas threw his head back, granting him access to his neck, and rutting his hips ever so slightly against his grip.
He pulled back away only to find Judas completely wrecked. Jesus had never seen a sight so beautiful.
A particular twist of his hand caused Judas’s eyes to squeeze shut, and his mouth parted to release a loud moan. Jesus relished the sound, watching him in awe.
Judas, suddenly aware again of Jesus’s eyes on him, appeared to feel self-conscious for a moment, turning his face away to bury it in the pillow.
“Don’t hide your pretty face from me,” Jesus told him, warm yet firm. “Let me see you. Please.”
Judas reluctantly pried his face back away from the pillow. He seemed tortured in the most delicious of ways to have this much attention showered on him.
Jesus quickened his pace once again. Having now learned a bit of what Judas responded to most through careful observation, he worked his hand as best he could to bring those pretty sounds out of him.
Judas clenched his fists in the sheets, and Jesus realized he was trying hard not to thrust his hips up against his hand.
Jesus kissed his lips and then brought his mouth close to his ear. “Chase the pleasure,” he whispered. “No need to feel ashamed.”
Judas whined and moved his hips tentatively.
“Just like that,” Jesus praised. “Keep going.”
Judas got more confident and began thrusting his hips up more consistently. Jesus matched his movements, paying close attention to the tip on every upthrust.
“Ah, Jesus!” Judas cried.
“That’s it. I’ve got you, baby. It’s alright.” Jesus kissed his cheeks as tears began to fall from Judas’s eyes.
He stared back down at his face, taking it all in. Pupils dilated, eyes shining blue in the morning light, eyelids halfway closed, translucent eyelashes wet with tears.
“Jesus! It feels so good,” he cried. “Please don’t stop. Please—“
“It’s okay,” Jesus soothed, kissing away the tears that fell from his eyes. “Let go. I’ve got you.”
He redoubled his efforts, moving his hand faster and with more purpose.
“You look gorgeous like this,” he marveled. “Let me take care of you.” The phrase slipped past his lips more like a plea. He wanted Judas to allow him this, to let him please him, to let him be the one to bring him over the edge.
“Ah, fuck,” Judas panted, barely holding on, hands reaching up to hold Jesus’s face and bring him closer for a kiss. “Please,” he murmured against his lips. “Please, please… Jesus.”
“I’ve got you, Judas. Come for me.”
“Jesus!” Judas cried out as he came, spilling all over Jesus’s hand and over his own shirt.
Jesus watched as his face contorted with pleasure. He continued to jerk him through the aftershocks, until his whole body went limp on the bed, legs still twitching as he came back down from his high.
He continued to stare as his chest heaved before his breath slowly evened out. Until finally, Judas blinked his eyes open and found Jesus staring at him in awe. He laughed, still slightly out of breath, and brought a hand up to cover his face.
“Can’t believe you just made me cry from a handjob.”
“Was it good?” Jesus asked, and the hesitation in his voice made it clear he genuinely didn’t know the answer.
Judas lowered his hand enough away from his eyes to stare at him, incredulous. “I don’t think I’d ever come that hard before. What the fuck, Jesus?” He chuckled before dragging a smiling Jesus back down for a kiss.
After they parted, Judas sat up just enough to take off his messy shirt. He rolled it up and found a clean spot so he could take Jesus’s hand in his own and wipe the cum and oil off of it, before tossing it to the corner of their tent. Then he pulled Jesus down to lie next to him, curled up against his side with Judas’s arm wrapped around his shoulders.
“Thank you, Jesus,” Judas said softly, and then placed a tender kiss on his lips. “Is there anything I could do for you?” he added, searching his gaze.
Jesus gave a slight shake of his head and hugged Judas closer, staring fondly back at him. “I’m okay, Judas. I just really enjoyed watching you like that. You’re gorgeous.”
Judas looked away as he felt himself go all red. He groaned in protest but said nothing more as a smile crept up on his lips.
“We should do this again soon,” Jesus said enthusiastically.
Judas huffed and let out a laugh as he said, “God, you’re gonna be the death of me.”