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Dreary morning light shines down upon an equally depressing array of neatly planted trees. Resigned to their fates as mere shrubs for other’s amusement. I’m nothing like that, though the truth remains that inanimate object and homunculus alike reek of a deep-rooted apathy.
“Late again?”
No reply comes, as is expected. The same old routine. Again. How much more until he grows tired?
A row of messy scribbles that one would usually chalk up to a small child’s shenanigans lies in a notebook, glaringly labeled “LATECOMERS,” in bright red ink. Kaiser, Kaiser, Kaiser. The same handwriting that’s scrawled across examination scripts, no doubt bearing a horrible grade and angry comments.
What’s the point of such arbitrary numbers? How could he ever be satisfied with just that? If he fails, then that’s just another year spent repeating the grade. Good, the more he can delay his indoctrination into mindless society, the better. Not like anyone cares about how well or how poorly he does, anyway. The excuse of a father he has will neglect him no matter what — that he’s sure of. Bringing home perfect test scores throughout elementary school wasn’t enough for his praise, so the boy had long since given up.
“You’re a smart boy, Michael,” and so what? Smarts alone won’t get anybody anywhere. People won’t throw themselves at his feet just because of good grades. Or more accurately, most people won’t; pardon the magenta eyes peek out from behind a corner, dutifully watching his every move.
A sharp voice yells out for a name that Kaiser doesn’t quite recognise, but rests on the tip of his tongue, followed by a panicked call to attention. Ness…? Oh, that’s the family name of some idiots that dedicate themselves to being slaves of the status-quo. He doesn’t know what he hates more: the fact that they’re happy being meaningless cogs in society’s gears, or the fact that he could never be anything like them; no matter how hard he tried.
To be honest, to be hardworking… to be normal.
There was a time in his life, too, where “normality” was within his grasp. A long gone memory of a family in the true sense of the word. Happy, comforting, loving. Reminiscing like this is pointless, because that bitch won’t ever return, and that sorry excuse of a man couldn’t love anyone again unless God himself commanded it.
He tried, and may God forgive him, he tried so desperately. He almost wished that his father’s fists would swing at him once more, if only it meant he spared him a second glance. If only it meant anyone, anyone at all, looked at him for longer than a second without pity in their gaze.
“Kaiser. Michael Kaiser, are you there? Shit, why’d they even let you in…”
Cause education is mandatory, asshole, his cobalt-tinged eyes flicker to the frustrated staff member standing over him. What, they think he’s so stupid that he can’t even understand his own mother tongue? If he’d a choice, he wouldn’t be in this hellhole anyways; it was the oh-so benevolent and kind government dragged him back there after he took a “gap year”.
Now he’s one year behind, and it’s too much work to catch up to the other kids his age. Pointless, anyway. He’ll rot in jail once he’s old enough to, no matter how good or bad his grades are. Might as well spend the time he has left having fun, rather than grinding at some ridiculous syllabus.
“Fuck’re you glaring at, boy? Son of a bitch… you piss me off. Maybe he’ll rub off on you,” says the unsurprisingly vulgar man, before pushing a gentle looking boy towards him. The name tag neatly pinned onto his sweater vest reads “Alexis Ness,” in a downright hideous bright yellow font. Yellow… means he’s the same age as Kaiser? He thinks, glancing at his own name tag: an equally ugly neon red, a badge of shame for being held back.
Ness, who looks like the textbook definition of a nerd, stares at the ground with a great interest — then he’d nudged forward again by Mr. Whatever, who scoffs at him. “He’s your tutor from now on. Don’t shoot the messenger,” he remarks with a scowl before leaving without a care in the world. Kaiser can hear him muttering as he walks off, and he doesn’t blame him.
Just as his lips part, ready to push his “tutor” away as he does any other prying eyes, a shaky voice speaks up.
“No! No, please hear me out! I’ve been watching you, and I wanted to… oh, god, not like that! I, I just thought that… well, you know… we could be friends? But it’s okay if you don’t want to, of course.”
Kaiser raises a skeptical eyebrow, unable to fathom why Ness would be so flustered by something as simple as speaking to him. Other than the very real possibility that this is some elaborate ploy to bully him, why in the world would he want to befriend him?
“Oh, god, do you think I’m weird?! Kaiser, you don’t hate me, right?! If I already messed up, then I should just go and die… please don’t misunderstand, all I want is to help you… You could do great things, I’m sure of it!”
…What the hell is this guy on?
“Just one lesson! That’s enough, and I’ll leave you alone after that.”
Not a single surface in this damned classroom isn’t covered in amateurish graffiti. Even the ceilings aren’t spared. So much for a conducive learning environment, the textbooks sprawled out in front of him are enough to make him bored out of his mind. Kaiser clicks his tongue, his bad habit of wearing his heart on his sleeve poking through the cool facade he painstakingly built up. In truth, he’s probably more emotional than your average hormonal teenager.
To be honest, he’s a lot of other things, too. He wants to do well, to become a psychology student, to adopt some dogs… but any sign of weakness is unbefitting of the reputation that the world assigned him.
“So, as you go down Group 1, the elements become more reactive… that’s cause the atomic radius is wider, and the force of attraction between the nucleus to the valence electrons get weaker, meaning less energy is required to produce a reaction. For example, if you… hey, are you listening?”
Kaiser snaps out of his trance, nodding half heartedly along to Ness’ ramblings. Usually, he’d find anyone blabbering away incessant and bothersome, but there’s a certain cadence that draws him to listen. As best as he could, at least.
“How about we take a break, Kaiser? You look tired,” suggests Ness, full of uncertainty. One misstep, and it’s all over! How lucky he was just to be able to spend time with Kaiser, his saviour… he can’t screw this up now.
In response, the other boy simply grunts while standing up to stretch, and Ness can’t help but revel in his majesty. Although Michael, his dear Michael, hasn’t a clue about how much he means to him, it feels as if he’s being blessed by the skies. Michael’s scent, his long blonde hair, everything is so…
It wasn’t that Alexis woke up one day with a newfound resolve to stalk Kaiser to the ends of the earth. More so that he was locked out for not having a perfect report card, and happened upon the glorious sight of what could only be magic. Nothing else could explain how nimbly he moved, pocketing whatever he could find from careless tourists and busy food stalls alike. It had to be supernatural, because the moment he ducked into an alleyway, stray dogs and cats alike flocked around him. The same beasts that he was forbidden to play with, lest he fall ill.
Just like a princess in a fairy tale.
No matter what everyone insists on telling him, he’s seen it! Proof of magic with his own two eyes: Michael Kaiser, and every ounce of his being. The whole world should worship him, because he is the rightful emperor of the universe!
“What are you looking at? Fuck, I can’t tell if you hate or love me. Kneel before me, or just leave me be.”
Despite his harsh tone of voice, the clearly sarcastic comment that was supposed to drive Ness away, and the fact that Kaiser is sneering at him from above, the whole world seemed to be covered in a thick blanket of sweet, blue roses. An intoxicating feeling, how he wanted to be consumed whole by it… surely, this is another form of magic.
If that’s what Kaiser wanted of him, then—
The view from below wasn’t great, but he could tell that Michael had raised his palm, ready to strike. Even if he were to beat the life out of him, Ness would relish in the fact that he was touched by the object of his affection.
The painful, harsh slap that he braced for is never delivered; quite the contrary. The touch of his palms are soft, softer than he expected, as they run through his hair. With practiced ease, as he’s comforted so many abandoned hounds the same way, Kaiser gently ruffles his hair with a smile that betrays his nonchalant image.
“You’re not bad, Alexis.”
His first name rolls off Michael’s tongue like soft, smooth butter. How he’s longed to hear this sweet sound, ambrosia from the garden of Eden itself! It’s saccharine, so much so that he thinks his teeth will rot and fall out of his mouth at once, but…
“Ye— yes, Kaiser!”
This love, at the present moment, is not pure. It is not as foretold in bedtime stories, or in poems and ballads from centuries ago.
“Don’t get it twisted. After I’m done with you, I’m done. You’re just a tool for my own enjoyment, Ness.”
Maybe, hopefully, in the future, it could be something worthy of praise. A passion to be envied by all.
“I don’t mind!”
Wings aflutter, magic in the air: The Giant African Swallowtail, possibly the most poisonous butterfly in the world — nevertheless, he takes a bite.
How could somebody fulfil any purpose other than the one they’d only ever known? And how could the anyone draw their eyes away from the reincarnation of true majesty?