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You’re having one of your bad days.
Sometimes you can push through just fine, the pain nothing more than a minor hindrance eating away at your edges while you work. Other days it’s a bit harder, holding you back from more difficult tasks, forcing you to stop and leave some things halfway done. And some days are like today, where you spend most of it laying face first on your bed, holding back tears. At this point you can’t tell if they’re from the pain or the disappointment of missing out on yet another feast, yet another party, yet another thing you cannot do.
It almost hurts more how kind everyone is about it. You’ve never asked for any kind of accommodation, but you still find your crewmates trying to help where they can. Yesterday Marco assured you he has a stash of painkillers just for you the moment you need them. You thanked him, even though they don’t seem to help much on days like this. Today, you’re greeted by thundering footsteps and the delicious smell of the feast from above growing closer and closer; Thatch has personally come to bring you a plate.
“Doing any better?” His voice is soft, hesitant to break the silence that surrounds you.
You left out a groan of pain when you attempt to sit up to face him.
“I see.” You can hear the sympathy pouring from him, as well as the gentle touch of a hand on your shoulder urging you not to move. The plate appears on the nightstand right next to your head, filled to the brim with all of your favorites. Some spicy, some sweet, some savory, all of it combining into a smell so mouthwatering you’re able to bring yourself to move, if only to shift closer to your feast. “I tried to make sure I got all of your favorites. If you want anything else, I can bring it down later.” He sets a glass of water down as well.
“Thanks, Thatch. I really appreciate it.” Your voice is a little wobbly, strained from the pain, and while you can’t see him wince you can almost feel it.
“No problem. I’ll…leave you to it, if you don’t need anything else.”
You would kill for some company right now, some distraction from the pain. But you hate the idea of being a bother, of tearing anyone else away from the action you so desperately wish to be a part of, so instead of voicing your needs you simply give a pained smile. “I’m alright. Thanks, though.”
He hesitates a moment, and you wonder if he’ll stay, but he sighs quietly. “Alright. Someone else’ll be down soon to check on you.”
He makes his way back upstairs, and you manage to reach out for your plate to grab a small piece of bread, which you immediately shove in your mouth. Normally you would try to savor it, but your stomach is grumbling, and your pain is demanding your attention, and there’s tears stinging your eyes. At least with this you can pretend just for a moment that you’re on deck, feeling fine, surrounded by your friends and their warmth.
“Enjoying that?” Ace’s voice is familiar and jovial, and a shiver runs up your spine the moment you hear him. The door closes softly behind him, and in an instant you can feel his weight on the bed. His hand rests lightly on your leg, bringing you more peace than you’ve felt all day.
“Yeah.” The word struggles to get out around the bread, but you manage, and he quietly laughs at the sound and sight of your cheeks stuffed full.
“Good. You deserve it.” He picks up another piece of bread, holding it in front of your face, pushing it close to your mouth. “Come on, enjoy another.”
You swallow, then open your mouth. He delicately places the piece on your tongue, fingers brushing your lips, before he pulls back. “Do you mind some company for a while?”
“Wha?” Your mouth is still stuffed full, and he chuckles again, laying down next to you.
“Do you mind if I stay down here with you? I’ve missed you.” He’s looking at you not with the pity you expected, or any sort of sympathy. His eyes are filled with nothing but pure and honest affection as he regards you.
You nod.
“Perfect!” He leans in, snuggling closer to you. One of his hands brushes against your back, and you wince, before he presses more firmly, making you cry out and squirm. “No, just one moment. I promise it’ll help.”
You don’t understand what he means, too lost in your own discomfort, before you feel a warmth spreading from his palm and into your skin. It doesn’t make the pain disappear, but for a moment, when you close your eyes, you can pretend it isn’t there. You can focus instead on the feeling of Ace laying beside you, his large hands on your back, his quiet pleased humming as he realizes he’s been successful in helping you.
You expect him to say something about how you can’t go upstairs, how he’s sorry you’re stuck down here while everyone else has fun. Instead, he whispers, “Thank you for letting me stay.” Like you’re doing him a favor. Like his presence here is just because he wants to be.
“Thank you for staying.” Your voice wobbles with emotion, though you try to hold it back. You grab the hand that isn’t on your back, holding it close, clinging to him like a lifeline.
He chuckles. “You don’t have to thank me for that, sunshine. I’d give anything to be here with you. No one else on this ship compares. No one else in the world.” He presses closer, his nose pressing into your neck. “You’re worth a thousand of these feasts.”
You hold his hand tighter. “I still wish I could go. I was really looking forward to this one.”
“There will be other parties.”
You can’t keep the sorrow from your voice. “But they won’t be this one.”
He doesn’t deny that. “But there will be parties. And for this one?” His hand gets a little warmer, relaxing your muscles and making your eyes droop. “For this one I’ll be right here with you. And we won’t have to worry about anything anyone else is doing. You’ll be too busy enjoying my company.” He almost giggles at that last one, and you can feel his nose crinkle as he says it, smile wide and uninhibited as it presses against your skin.
“So true,” you murmur, fighting a smile. “How could I ever want anything else?” It’s almost embarrassing how much you mean it, but he can’t see the blush on your face, so you don’t bother holding back your dorky, toothy grin. You’re melting into his touch, starting to forget the loneliness, the grief at what you’ve lost tonight, however small in the grand scheme of things. The only thing that matters right now is Ace, his warmth, his touch, his voice as he happily tells you whatever silly story he thinks will catch your attention at the time. By the end of the night, curled into his side, his warm hand rubbing soothing circles onto your lower back, you almost forget about the party above deck, or any of the world outside of this room.