Chapter Text
Taehyun wakes to the Kaiju alarm resounding throughout the Shatterdome, blaring at full volume at 0400 hours. He sits upright and swings his legs off the edge of the bed, narrowly missing Soobin’s head at the bottom as his co-pilot tosses him his boots.
Midnight Ego, report to Bay 05. Level E-40. Codename, Diamondback. Category III.
“My eyes aren’t even opened yet, fuck,” Taehyun mutters to himself, almost tripping on his way to the door.
Soobin catches him just in time. He realizes belatedly he was about to dive headfirst into the steel door of their bedroom. “Easy, tiger.”
A murmured thanks is all Soobin gets out of him as they race towards the hangar.
It takes them 45 seconds to weave through the crowd– here in this mechanized space housing numerous facilities and operations, everyone walks with a purpose, the clamor of voices and sounds of heavy-set boots against the floors become a steady rhythm. Chaotic, but Taehyun drowns it all until it becomes muted. As if he’s submerged his head into water.
As soon as he and Soobin reach the hangar, they waste no time in taking the elevator upwards to the Drivesuit Room.
Just a few feet ahead of them is Midnight Ego, majestic, her build radiating strength and grace; azure blue against obsidian black with her insignia shining under the spotlights.
The marks left behind by Sharphook over the left shoulder all the way to the back is an eyesore. They haven’t completed her cosmetic repairs yet, but she’s fully operational in less than a week following their victory over the Kaiju. Taehyun glares at the offending claw marks with a fiery determination.
A battle scar. More to come from that.
Beside him, he feels Soobin tap his foot, shifting his weight from side to side and then repeating, swaying. It’s not a nervous tick anymore, one that Taehyun comes to learn is the elder’s way of loosening up the tension. To awaken the dead muscles in the legs. To move .
Within a five thousand ton metal monster of mankind’s own creation, it takes a lot of energy just to raise a fingertip. Soobin is prepared, and so is he.
The moment they exit the elevator, technicians swarm around them as they get fitted into their Drivesuits and helmets. Once the spinal clamps are locked in and the remains of the relay gel leave a metallic tang in Taehyun’s nose and mouth, they initiate Neural Handshake.
The plunge into the Drift is relatively smooth this time. Midnight Ego gets hooked to the Jumphawks and in less than 2 minutes she’s lifted off the hangar bay towards the coastlines of Jeju.
They spot the colossal abomination just outside the miracle mile. It seems to be taking its time against the strong currents, wading towards the island while leaving a trail of phosphorus blue behind.
General Hirai’s voice reverberates throughout the Conn-Pod. “Analysis report just came in. The spikes on its back are oozing some sort of toxic substance. It’s not hazardous in this quantity, but I want you to keep it clean this time, Rangers. Aim for the head.”
“Yes, ma’am!” They reply in unison– the ghost of Soobin’s voice leaves his lips like a hushed whisper, and his words rest on Soobin’s tongue until it fizzles out.
The Drift remains intact.
Midnight Ego drops into the ocean, and for a moment her visor is clouded by sprays of saltwater as she stands tall, right leg shifting to balance herself, plasmacaster on her right hand charging, crackling yellow underneath the pale moonlight. Battle ready.
SYSTEMS ENGAGED.
The offending green dot marking the Kaiju in front of them halts and swivels its head to roar at them.
Before it has time to fully turn around, Soobin fires the plasmacaster. The impact stuns Diamondback and it bellows in pain, howling into the night sky like a terrible nightmare.
“Let’s get this son of a bitch!” Taehyun yells, using this small window of time to take the Kaiju by surprise. To end it swiftly and to go back victorious.
Just like last time.
Midnight Ego charges at the beast. Taehyun deploys the chainsaw– its blades made out of diamond tipped shears that could cut through the toughest of Kaiju hides– and aims for its throat. Soobin notices the monster craning its neck, jaw snapping the air anticipating the attack and instantly recoils. Its razor sharp teeth narrowly misses the left arm.
They stagger backwards, unsteady. The waters shudder underneath their weight. Diamondback crashes into them headfirst, the impact nearly tipping them over. Soobin braces the right arm under Diamondback’s throat, keeping the crushing jaws away from the Conn-Pod. The pain that flares from the abdomen up becomes excruciating the longer they hold against the weight of the Kaiju, its horned dome managing to burst through Midnight Ego’s right rib. Its intention to bring them down into the sea is jarringly obvious.
He feels Soobin’s desperation to get this thing off of them so they can have a fighting chance.
Not like this. Not like this. They think through gritted teeth, spurred on by the shared sentiment to survive this. To return back home alive and to see the sun rise for another day.
To ride with one another again. And again; and again.
We’re going to be fine. It’s Soobin above the monster’s roars and the flurry of alarms in the Conn-Pod; his thoughts flooding Taehyun’s, filtering the noise out. And Taehyun meets him halfway.
With a cry, he swings the chainsaw and plunges into flesh. It cuts down the side of the Kaiju, its blue blood already seeping into the sea as it pulls back momentarily before lunging with a vengeance so bloodthirsty it’s reflected in its mindless, savage gait to maul them.
This time, they are ready.
The chainsaw pierces upwards through its throat until the tip protrudes out the back of its head, and with their joint strength, toss it aside, slicing its jaw clean off in the process.
Diamondback falls into the waters, bathing in its own pool of corrosive blood.
Did we kill it?
They wait for LOCCENT’s confirmation with bated breath. Another kill to add to their streak. They can already hear General Hirai's satisfied hum, the promised Come home, Rangers; the walk back to the Shatterdome like rote memory.
They get to go back. And the war continues on.
For the briefest of moments, as the heavy weight of adrenaline begins to lift off of their heated skins, another green dot appears right behind them.
(Nagini, they later named it. Category IV.
LOCCENT reveals they had detected a second Kaiju signature as soon as Diamondback had fallen; the spikes on its back turned out to belong to another Kaiju. Like a parasite, it stayed motionless until its host was dead before taking over to finish the job.)
Their command line is beeping nonstop. Alarms are blaring. General Hirai’s voice crackles through the comms, a garbled it’s gaining on you, Midnight! Evade to the left is all they are able to make out as Midnight Ego is caught off guard, nearly keeling over from the force of the new serpentine Kaiju as it latches onto them, screeching triumphantly.
Soobin swings the right arm in an attempt to grab it and peel it off. But Nagini is swift to counter it, coiling its body around the arm to subdue it, crushing metal. The pain is agonizing; Taehyun feels it only seconds behind Soobin as the elder screams while trying to disengage before it paralyzes his own.
They’re fighting blind, unable to obtain a visual of the Kaiju as it maintains itself just outside of their vision, choosing to stay in their blindspot.
“Are you alright?” Taehyun hears himself yell above the struggle.
“Soobin–”
A sudden burst of white flashes across Taehyun’s vision, blinding him momentarily. The heat comes after, burning like fireworks– whiplash from hearing seagulls by the beach while ice cream melts in Soobin’s hands, to Yeonjun choosing a cheap movie and then laughing at the scenes that don’t make sense– now leaving him to chase after a retreating shadow. A cruel dissonance.
Soobin!
There’s nothing on the other side of the void to respond back to him.
Somewhere in the muted background, Nagini sounds like it's laughing.
≡
The sunlight barely makes it past black roiling clouds, menacing, serving to only plunge Taehyun’s room further into darkness. It's half past nine in the morning, his belongings are neatly packed in a suitcase, and yet it feels like time hasn't moved even for a second since last evening. Taehyun stands by the window, staring out at the distant horizon, at the frozen tundras and the rolling valleys and the white mountaintops.
He knows that somewhere on the island, a storm is brewing, ready to unleash its fury onto the battered earth. Though, the knowledge of the impending thunderstorm brings little to no reaction to Taehyun, even when he knows of its intensity. It’s the past nine months spent at the Academy that makes him hyper aware of the forecasts– the disastrous weathers; a sudden drop in temperature and the risk of being snowed in; the Kaiju emergence alarms, of the attacks broadcasted from the screens in the mess hall; the falls of mighty Jaegers and its pilots, never to be recovered, their noble sacrifice a sorry epitaph as they remain faceless, for there were no bodies to be laid to rest.
Snapshots of memories from when he first arrived on the island, to the grueling heat of the drills and training throughout all three trimesters, to ending up where he is now, alone. He squeezes his eyes shut as he runs the word over and over in his head.
Alone.
He wasn’t alone when this all started. In fact, the one permanent fixture in his life slipped past the cracks of his heart, now oceans away from him.
It has been three months since Yeonjun was promoted to Ranger, having found his partner who had been flown in from Hong Kong specifically for him. Their psych analyses had been promising, the perfect balance, they said, which drove both parties to promptly match them up during the anticipated Compatibility Test to produce the most formidable pair today– pilots of Hong Kong’s shiny new Jaeger, Satellite Rebel.
On that day, fate decided to play its cruelest joke on Taehyun, taking a turn unexpectedly, no longer on his side. Or perhaps it was never on his side to begin with.
In retrospect, he knew that it was never meant to be. That small hope of becoming Rangers together with Yeonjun had been running through the spaces between his enclosed fists for a long time now. He’s long held on to it, doesn’t know when to let go. No matter how tightly he squeezed, making sure there weren't any gaps, it all fell through in the end.
Their scores were often a game of inches– too much push and pull, like a tug-of-war, filled with their own pride and competitiveness that it became unbalanced. Slowly, the bond they nurtured ever since they were kids, neighbors who used to play in each other’s homes back in Seoul unraveled like a stray thread pulled from its spool, leaving nothing behind.
They used to spar a lot, he and Yeonjun. Taehyun was good at fighting, has always been good at it. After being tossed around by the bigger recruits in the earlier months, he decided to trade sleep for more hours in the Kwoon Room, perfecting his forms and improving his strength and endurance. Yeonjun would always be there with him; sometimes to monitor and correct his stances, other times as his sparring partner.
In the trimesters that followed, Taehyun managed to come out at the top of the ranks alongside Yeonjun. But even then, he knew that he was leagues away from him, more so when he paled in comparison whenever he stood beside him– the way people looked at Yeonjun with barely concealed reverence and with great expectations. In their eyes, they saw an exceptional cadet; a bright, burning torch that would become one of many beacons of hope for the human race.
He remembers hugging Yeonjun a little too long, a little too tightly that day as his co-pilot, a tall gangly kid with dark hair by the name of Huening Kai, waited for him at the end of the hallway leading towards the helipad.
“I’ll call you once I’ve landed,” Yeonjun sniffed. He had always been the more emotional one between them both. “I hope your co-pilot comes soon. I’ll be waiting for the day we can fight side by side, Tyun-ah.”
And Taehyun remembers swallowing the rocks that had formed in his throat, making it hard for him to speak, to breathe even. He tried to stave off the tears until after Yeonjun was gone.
“See you when I see you, hyung.”
The last image of Yeonjun etched onto the back of his eyelids every time he goes to sleep is his retreating back, walking away from him with an arm outstretched to his co-pilot and slinging it over his broad shoulders.
Three months of waiting, of achieving ten-nils against the newer recruits, of hearing his instructor’s empty praises as he watched each and every one of them getting promoted by the end of the trimester. Everyone besides him.
All of his victories over them were meaningless, especially when the very essence of achieving Drift compatibility is to forge a partnership instead of finishing the race with strength alone.
He needed to build that connection with someone, one who would be able to light the smallest spark within him, and together, they would create the perfect firestorm.
Someone who isn’t Yeonjun, who isn’t any of the friends he had made there– an equal he hasn’t yet found.
And the offer finally presented itself in the form of an administration officer knocking on his door one evening, informing him to report to the Marshal’s office. Already, a hurricane had started to stir in the pits of his stomach.
Marshal Casey beckoned him towards his desk once he arrived, shutting the door behind him. “Have a seat, Kang.”
“What’s this about, sir?”
The man had pulled out a yellow file from one of the drawers and slid it onto the table, nudging the cadet to open it and view the contents. Taehyun frowned, his forehead creased as he unlooped the string and read through the documents. They were transfer documents. His transfer.
The Marshal must have sensed the oncoming surprise from Taehyun, taking it upon himself to address it before their meeting gets dragged on unnecessarily. “I’ve put in a special transfer for you to the Nagasaki Shatterdome. I strongly believe that you would be a better fit there as they have some of the brightest recruits with similar skill sets and psyches to yours. I am made to understand that one of them could be your future co-pilot.”
Taehyun tried to make sense of the Marshal’s words, but his mind was a muddled mess, the storm within him only worsened at this new piece of information. He looked down at the papers in his hands, slowly flipping through them to catch certain key details about himself, his records and achievements at the Academy, right down to his personal preferences.
It all seemed so carefully planned. But Taehyun had a hard time accepting a decision he had no prior knowledge of, much less the ability to agree to it.
“Sir, I’m honored that you would go through all the trouble to process my transfer. But I would rather be stationed here.”
Was it the truth, though? Or was it something that Taehyun had forced himself to believe, to choose to remain stationary while the world continued on without him ever making an impact like so many of his former classmates, stationed in different Shatterdomes around the world piloting their own Jaegers?
Marshal Casey had fixed him with a stare that stripped him down to his very core, exposing all of his cards and lining them neatly face up on the table. Taehyun was more than aware that he can see through the false bravado, yet he tried to level his steely gaze with his own. If his eyes wavered, the Marshal made no mention of it.
“Let me ask you something, Kang. Do you still want to be a Ranger?”
A pause, one second too late to recover. Then, “Yes, sir.”
“And do you think you can become one right now? What, or who are you benefiting by staying here where there’s nothing left for you?”
Taehyun feels like getting punched in the gut.
“Sir, I’m not giving up–”
“Then go to Nagasaki,” Marshal Casey says with an air of finality. A brief second and Taehyun might have missed it– the Marshal’s stoic face softening ever so slightly as he regarded him.
“I’m not asking you to give up, Kang. I’ve seen the potential you’ve grown into, and I am not about to let you waste your days away waiting for someone who might not even be here.”
The man leaned forward on his desk, and in this light, Taehyun not only saw the ghostly outline of the world’s first hero, the first Ranger to ever pilot a Jaeger solo and defeat a Kaiju– in that moment, he also saw a respected, battle-hardened veteran who fully understood what it meant to face challenges alone.
“They will be expecting you tomorrow. General Hirai herself will personally see to it that you’re well-acclimated and settled into the facilities. You should be able to engage in their ongoing training sessions once you’ve completed the standard orientation.”
A hand on his shoulder, the weight of it not only signified a resolute farewell, but also a renewed hope. “I have faith in you.”
It was that line alone that snapped Taehyun out of his self-induced stasis.
Grounding himself to reality, shaking off the nerves that seemed to crawl over his skin, he spots the shadow of a helicopter in the distance, growing larger and larger as it nears the landing strip. The PPDC logo along with the flag of Japan displayed proudly on its flank. He tears himself away from the window and grabs his suitcase.
He is slightly disappointed that he won't be around to witness the island after the impending thunderstorm, for Kodiak has always looked breathtaking in its afterglow, as if reborn.
≡
“Welcome to Nagasaki!”
General Hirai greets Taehyun as soon as he lands, shouting above the noise of the helicopter blades and the morning drills taking place around the outer bay.
Taehyun bows, formal, before shaking her hand. Her grip is firm and sure. She eyes him curiously, determining the value of his presence in her jurisdiction. There is something clinical in the way she dissects him, as if he’s been placed under a microscope while she takes him apart– his strengths and insecurities he thought locked behind iron-clad doors are all visible to her.
Whatever it is that she was searching for, she seems satisfied after only a split second scrutiny. “It’s great to have you here. Let’s get you sorted out.”
Taehyun takes in the enormous structure of the Shatterdome, marveling at the towering cluster of buildings and the signature domed rooftop that he’s sure is standard PPDC-issued design. He wonders, will this be where he finally pledges his allegiance? To be able to anchor himself to a place, a person, and finally getting the chance to contribute to the battle against the same monsters that are intent on wiping them out.
The general briefs him of their current situation as they walk towards the yawning entrance of the hangar leading into the central building.
“As you are well aware, the threats from the Kaiju have been escalating in the past months, their attacks becoming increasingly bold. A shift in their agenda has them targeting prominent locations, engaging our Jaegers so frequently that we have since lost four across the Pacific, further exhausting our resources and the time it takes to generate future capable Rangers. Do you understand where I’m going with this?”
They enter the elevator and General Hirai turns to him as soon as the doors close, gaze unwavering, gauging for a resolve she expects from someone who has come too far to give up now.
Taehyun understands her perfectly.
She nods. “This Shatterdome used to house three Jaegers– Nova Deception, Eclipse Avenger, and Puma Brave– the latter of which, well, its pilots are no longer with us.”
The atmosphere in the elevator goes quiet. The officers flanking them hang their heads to grieve, to honor the dead. But General Hirai has her chin tilted upwards, eyes trained straight ahead, defiant even in the face of despair.
“We then immediately began working on the new Jaeger that was specially imported from Seoul. They named her Midnight Ego. She will be fully operational and ready for her first Neural Handshake in about a week from now.”
Taehyun sucks in a breath. Midnight Ego. Her name dances around in his mind, tastes honey-sweet on his tongue, until it makes a home there. And it feels good; it feels right.
After stumbling blind in the unknown for what feels like forever, his fate is finally tied to something tangible, no longer uncertain shapes that were always out of his grasp.
The elevator doors swing open and General Hirai turns to him, then, “I’m afraid this is where we part. My officer here will show you to your quarters. I’m looking forward to seeing what you’re capable of. Marshal Casey rarely vouches for anyone, much less a recruit, so he must think highly of you.”
He replays the Marshal’s words in his head, I have faith in you, and feels a surge of pride coursing through his veins. Taehyun vows to honor those words. He won’t let him down, not when he’s helped him get to where he is now. He’s so close.
“I expect that Jaeger to be piloted by exceptional rangers, Kang. I’ll see you next week during the Compatibility Test.”
≡
Taehyun gives up on chasing sleep that night. He’s been trying to shut his eyes, hoping the exhaustion from traveling earlier today would settle on his bones and drag him into an easy slumber. It doesn’t work.
He wonders if it’s due to the change in climate, how it’s not as freezing as it was on Kodiak– here, the warm summer’s heat is making his shirt cling to his back.
At this time of night, the Shatterdome is silent, save for the soft rhythmic hums of the engines below and the dull clangs of the pipe systems running along the walls. Far below, he hears the ocean waves crash against the well-fortified foundations, the tides roaring like a savage beast unable to satiate its own hunger.
It’s another hour of tossing and turning and counting sheep before Taehyun decides to put on his running shoes and go for a walk.
The layout of the facility is still fresh in his mind as he heads towards the training areas. He passes by their Kwoon Room and is immediately drawn to the weapons rack.
“No freaking way. That’s not fair,” he murmurs in awe.
The equipment looks brand new. Jade-tipped bo staffs that are heavier but uniquely balanced as Taehyun grips one, feeling the weight of it as he swings experimentally, his muscles slowly waking up at the sudden action. He finds the fencing swords next, designed with pistol grips that allows him better control of the blade as he executes stronger movements compared to the typical swords he was so used to seeing back at the Academy.
And then he comes across the boxing gloves. Some are tattered and worn, as if they had gone through so many battles– those that had occurred in this very room throughout the years– and survived each one of them. Others still have that new leather scent.
Taehyun is swept up into a memory of his younger days; coming back from his boxing lessons, hair matted with sweat and bruises that covered every inch of his exposed skin. He would wear his gloves around his neck proudly, the store-bought leather smell long gone, yet it was a constant reminder that he is and has alway been a fighter.
He looks around. He may be standing in a different Kwoon Room, but the history it holds gives him the same sense of duty-bound honor as if he were in the Jaeger Academy’s combat room. He drinks it all in– the musky scent of sweat that hangs stale in the air, the marks on the floor left by fallen bodies and the ends of bo staffs.
This is where he will carve his legacy. This is where he will meet his co-pilot.
Just then, he catches movement on the edge of his periphery. He turns towards the doorway and finds a tall man wearing a J-Tech suit staring at him with wide eyes– he looks just as surprised as Taehyun, as if the both of them were caught doing something they shouldn’t.
The man bows, frantically scrambling to put together an apology in terrible Japanese. Taehyun tastes a bit of home in his tone, one that reminds him of the view of the Han River as the sunset hits the horizon at just the right time, creating sparkling ripples on the water’s surface.
“That’s alright,” he responds in Korean and stifles a laugh at the man’s reaction. His head snaps up to look at him; shock is an understatement with the way his mouth slightly hangs ajar. Then, almost immediately, he breathes a sigh of relief, his shoulders relaxing.
The air around them feels calmer now, the impending tension fizzling out as fast as it came. “Sorry, I thought you were one of the instructors or a recruit trying to sneak in some extra hours to train.”
“Well, you’re not too far off the mark,” Taehyun shrugs. “I couldn’t sleep and found my way here.”
The person’s mouth forms a cute ‘o’ at that. Taehyun compartmentalizes that thought somewhere deep within the recesses of his mind. He contemplates throwing the key away, but the J-Tech guy is speaking to him again. He’s eyeing him up and down, head tilted in confusion.
“Hey, so. I don’t think I’ve seen you around before. If you’re not a recruit, are you one of the newer Jumphawk pilots, then?”
Taehyun shakes his head at that. “Just arrived this morning, actually, from Kodiak. I‘ve been told that I’ll be piloting Midnight Ego, that I’ll find my co-pilot here.”
As soon as he mentions the newly built Jaeger, the man gasps, eyes wide with an excitement that could rival a child receiving presents on his birthday.
“Holy shit it’s you! Midnight Ego’s future pilot everyone’s been talking about. I didn’t know you'd be arriving today, hell, I would’ve given you a tour of Midnight if the General told me about you– ah, right, where are my manners. Choi Soobin, at your service,” he bows, his dark hair bouncing at the motion. “I’m one of the lead engineers in charge of Midnight’s development.”
He pauses, realizes. Then sheepishly adds: “Sorry. Didn’t mean to ramble,” to which Taehyun waves it off, grinning at the rays of enthusiasm the other emits. It’s contagious.
“I’m Kang Taehyun.” His chest swells with pride at having been acknowledged as someone of importance here. “And, I would’ve loved the personal introduction.”
The engineer beams at that. “You’re going to love her. She’s a goddess of war.”
“I’ll take your word for it, Soobin-ssi.”
A blanket of silence hovers above them after. Taehyun pulls off the boxing gloves and stores it with the rest while Soobin is still standing at the entrance, feet shifting nervously as he eyes him from across the room. His thoughts are loud, it’s obvious as they play on his facial expressions. But Taehyun is unable to discern any of them.
So, he decides to ask the obvious: “Anyway, what are you doing out so late?”
The alarmed look that zips across Soobin’s features is as real as the flesh on their skins, almost comical in the way he freezes to his spot. Taehyun thinks he may have struck a nerve somewhere.
“I– uh. I left something behind at the hangar, yeah. I was just walking back when I saw the lights on here. So I came to check it out.”
Taehyun hums, not really taking his words at face value, though he commends his effort to attempt a cover-up lie nonetheless. That is, until he notices the bag that Soobin is carrying over one side of his shoulder. The other man’s hand is clutching the strap, fingers gripping it tightly and angling his body to conceal it behind his back.
If Taehyun doesn’t know any better, he would have immediately recognized it as a gym bag.
Soobin shifts, obviously bothered by the tension in the air. “I’ll get going now. It was nice to meet you, Kang Taehyun-ssi.”
And he disappears into the hallway before Taehyun can get another word out.
“Huh,” he thinks out loud, now alone again– the room has become larger and infinitely emptier without the other’s presence to keep him company.
Somehow, Soobin made him feel at ease, less lonely. He carries with him the essence of a home Taehyun misses terribly, hasn’t gone back to in a while now; a home he is determined to protect. He can feel that their encounter tonight is just the beginning of many more, accidental or otherwise.
Besides,
That guy still owes me a Jaeger tour.
≡
As luck would have it, Taehyun spots Soobin from across the mess hall during lunch the next day, sitting with a group of other J-Tech engineers. He walks past the Nagasaki recruits, feels their eyes boring into his back, trained on him like hawks as he makes his way to the other side of the hall.
The minute Soobin locks eyes with him, the same look of panic from last night sets into his features. He can’t run away this time.
“Hi,” Taehyun announces his presence, almost satisfied at the way it makes Soobin squirm in his seat. “Mind if I sit with you guys?”
One of the older engineers, KIM his tag reads, stares up at Taehyun, slightly surprised that someone from the Jaeger programme would want to mingle with them on their own free will. “Whoa, hello, there. Um, I don’t think any of us here would mind. But, maybe you’re on the wrong side of the hall, kid.”
Taehyun smiles politely at him, then at Soobin, “It’s great to see you again, Soobin-ssi. Under better circumstances this time.”
It’s almost like watching a cartoon at this point. Everyone is gawking at Soobin while he looks like he wishes the ocean would swallow him whole and drag him into the depths than be physically here to deal with Taehyun’s surprise appearance.
“We- uh. We met last night,” he grapples for words. Apparently, they seem to elude him any time he’s nervous. Then, as if remembering a vital piece of information, his face lights up: “He’s going to be Midnight’s pilot.”
The whole table goes into an uproar. Another save by Choi Soobin.
“Now, why didn’t you say so? Come on, scooch over guys– here, sit down, kid. Welcome to the Nagasaki Shatterdome!” Kim pats the seat beside him.
“Thank you. Are all of you engineers for Midnight Ego?” Taehyun asks as he takes a bite of his sashimi set, choosing a lighter meal rather than the rice bowls piled high with beef teriyaki or the ramen with thick creamy broths.
“That’s right. I’m Team Leader Kim Seokjin, I oversee the entire development– this is my team. Apparently, you’ve already met Soobin before any of us.”
“And somehow he neglected to share that information with us all morning. What’s up with that?” Another engineer leans back in his chair and narrows his eyes at Soobin, though he’s grinning, almost playful. Said perpetrator puts his hands up defensively.
“Come on, guys, lay off. We just bumped into each other in the hallway, that's all.” A brief glance at Taehyun and then he’s turning to someone else. “At any rate, I thought there was going to be an announcement or something. It’s not my fault that top-down communication is the one thing that sucks ass here– oh, wait, maybe the air conditioners, too.”
Taehyun pokes nonchalantly at a zuke maguro, “Yeah. Maybe if they’d announced my arrival, you would have prepared a tour of Midnight Ego for me, huh?”
Taehyun decides right there and then that teasing Soobin is the most entertaining thing he’s done ever since he’s set foot here. Their table is the rowdiest, the engineers are talking over each other excitedly, heckling Soobin and pushing his buttons, not paying their neighbors any mind. Though Taehyun begins to feel more eyes on him now– expectant, curious, envious stares. He ignores them in favor of Soobin finally relenting and promising to take him to the hangar after lunch.
Team Leader Kim excuses himself to attend an emergency huddle meeting while the rest of the engineers are going to use what little time they have during lunch break to visit the town outside the Shatterdome– it’s only him and Soobin in the elevator.
As they ascend to the main hangar bay, Soobin turns to him, face haggard. Taehyun tries not to let his smile break through. “You’re a real pain in the ass, huh.”
“You promised me a tour, though,” Taehyun retorts.
The engineer gives him a pointed look but doesn’t satisfy Taehyun further with a response. As they reach the entrance, the sheer scale of the place leaves Taehyun breathless– a vast space housing so many people coexisting with metal and machinery. To his right, he spots the two currently active Jaegers stationed on their respective loading docks, their numbers displayed in faded copper on the floor below. He tilts his head back as he marvels at the pure, unbridled strength radiating off of them.
Metal scaffoldings criss-cross the walls, with clusters of platforms built near the Jaeger’s heads as technicians and engineers work around it. He almost misses it– behind him, above the noise of construction and metal clanging against metal, Soobin is calling his name.
“C’mon. Midnight’s over here,” he says, nudging to the long-winding stairs that leads them up, up, up, and up.
Once they reach the top, Taehyun gets his first glimpse at Midnight Ego’s head, where half of her face is still undergoing maintenance– steel plates embedded to reinforce the underlying framework made out of wiring and other metal components.
He leans over the railings to see her chest split open. Above them, a pulley carrying a hyperion blaster is slowly being fitted into the designated space. Taehyun lets out a whistle at the weapon, knowing the magnitude of damage it can inflict onto a Kaiju.
Soobin joins him in admiring his life’s work. “I told you she’s a goddess of war.”
“Yeah, you weren’t kidding.” Even as he’s looking at her with his own eyes, he’s still struggling to wrap his head around the sheer fact that this is his. His Jaeger, at long last.
“I can’t believe she’s mine,” he murmurs, voice barely above a whisper, letting his thoughts take on the shape of words that linger on his tongue so he can taste it, so he knows it’s real. The feeling of awe has him in a vise-like grip.
But Soobin catches it. He peers at the cadet, his expression unreadable, worrying his bottom lip as he considers sharing a piece of himself with Taehyun that he has long since buried– dug a grave so deep in unmarked soil that he’s forgotten where it is in order to dig it back up. Doesn’t know whether he’s worth it, standing beside a soon-to-be ranger while his past slowly eats him alive.
He decides to take that leap.
“For what it’s worth, I’m glad you’re her pilot.” He doesn’t face Taehyun as he speaks, choosing to instead look at his hands, clasping them together so tightly that the tips of his fingers bloom red.
“It used to be my dream, too, you know? To be able to pilot a Jaeger, to go out there and kick some Kaiju ass– save the world and all that stuff. Didn’t make the cut, though.” A bitter laugh, eyes shifting anywhere else so it doesn’t land on Taehyun’s. “All the hard work I’ve poured into the programme and I wasn’t compatible with anyone. It kinda messed me up.”
Taehyun's world stops at a standstill, shocked at the sudden revelation that it renders him speechless. Soobin had been part of the Jaeger Programme?
“So I decided– why wait around when I can do something else, you know? If there’s anything I can do that will indirectly contribute to fighting the Kaiju, save the world in a different way, then I should take it.”
Soobin looks down at the moving shapes of people milling around the docks. From this height, it’s easy to blurt out secrets without worrying if it reaches another person’s ears. So, Taehyun thinks, who does this benefit?
“How’d you end up here?” Taehyun hears himself asking, curiosity filling in the heavy cloud of confession suspended in the air.
“Once the Seoul Shatterdome finished construction, I applied to the J-Tech department there. I was only there for a year or so before being relocated here following Midnight Ego’s creation.”
The silence finally sets in between them. They find themselves at a loss for words– what is there left to say? If a bridge has been burned down and left for abandon, will there be anything left to recover, to piece it back together?
On one hand, Taehyun can empathize with him. Soobin used to be in his exact position, standing at a crossroads where one path has been barred while another leads him here. However, another part of him feels a tinge of resentment slowly rising towards his chest, constricting him, filling the space with misplaced anger, unable to accept Soobin’s actions to just leave that life behind, to move on.
He opens his mouth to say something, anything, when Soobin finally turns to him. There’s pain underneath a thin layer of feigned indifference. He offers him a small smile and changes the subject. “Thanks for earlier, by the way. You didn’t tell the others where I actually was last night.”
Taehyun shrugs, the words unsaid turning sour in his mouth. He’s almost relieved to be able to move on from the topic. “I don’t see why you’re worried they’d find out you’ve been working out at night. I think that’s normal.”
Soobin blinks at him, though doesn’t offer anything additional to that statement.
Instead, he looks over his shoulder, probably eyeing the group of engineers that just entered the hangar.
“Yeah. Look, I have to get going. We’re working overtime to fully prepare Midnight Ego for her first deployment. So…” he trails off.
There’s a lot to be said, hindered only by the voice that betrays him into silence. Instead, he says: “All the best in finding your co-pilot, Taehyun-ssi.”
In the days that followed, Taehyun doesn’t see Soobin or his team members at their usual spot during lunch, nor do they seem to ever cross paths. Even as he stands at the hangar entrance, waiting for a familiar face to walk past him, all he receives are puzzled stares from the other engineers and operators.
At night, as he practices Krav Maga alone in the Kwoon Room, he half-expects to see the engineer’s face poking in from the doorway.
Unfortunately for Taehyun, he doesn’t get the same luck twice. It almost seems like Soobin’s existence has been completely erased, leaving him with a gaping hole in his chest where the feeling of home was just about to return.
≡
The day of reckoning doesn’t feel any different from the ones held at the academy, though the crowd that turns up and fills the hallway leading towards the Kwoon Room makes it seem like this is a widely-anticipated event. Taehyun knows it’s not the entire headcount of the Shatterdome, but it sure as hell feels like everyone with dubious amount of spare time has converged here specifically to witness the promotion.
Outside, they’re placing bets– eyeing the likely candidate that matches the speed and strength that Taehyun exhibits as he sweeps his staff from underneath the recruit’s feet, effectively knocking him off and onto his back with a loud thud, followed by a groan.
8-2.
Taehyun rakes his hair back, wiping some of the sweat on his forehead as he helps his opponent to his feet. He feels invincible like this, displaying his ability to best those who were claimed to be his equals– drawing an even bigger gap that further separates him from the rest.
“Good work,” he says to the recruit, who can only offer him a nod before hobbling to join the rest of his peers, embarrassed.
He sneaks a glance towards General Hirai who’s standing at the front of the room– beside her, Neural Instructor Dr. Myoui has her eyebrows in a knot, pen clicking incessantly as she scribbles on her clipboard, muttering under her breath. The general doesn’t give way to her emotions, holding her expressions well.
But as it stands, none of the four potential candidates they presented were a perfect match.
“It seems as though you’ve exhausted all your options, general,” Taehyun says as he swings the bo staff over his shoulder. He knows he’s coming off as arrogant, a dangerously misplaced attitude in a situation where he knows he won’t benefit if he were to push further.
“If I am meant to pilot a Jaeger, I should have a worthy co-pilot.”
The air in the room grows taut with tension. Everyone is looking at the general now, who gives Taehyun a tight-lipped smile, “If you must know, Kang , those candidates you fought earlier were not by my recommendation. It’s protocol to handpick our recruits so it looks nice on the papers. But, if I were to have my way, you would have met your match the day you stepped foot here.”
Before Taehyun has a chance to ask her what she means by that, she calls out a name he least expects.
A name that had brought him warmth and made him feel anchored and secured, now turning into an icy blade that carves deep into the middle of his chest.
“Is Choi Soobin here?”
A confused murmur breaks out throughout the space, bleeding into the hallways where the other staff are huddled together, heads swiveling to locate a face to the spoken name.
It takes a few seconds, each tick on the clock resting atop the wall feels like an eternity before Soobin walks in wearing the same shell-shocked expression as everyone else. He looks out of place here– here, standing in the combat room that was once his entire life; a far off memory that had been cut loose now coming back to haunt him.
And for the briefest of moments, Taehyun thinks that this is all a huge mistake, knows that Soobin must feel it too. But the other male is staring straight at him, eyes melting into his, and Taehyun remembers his words from atop the platform surrounded by scaffolding, admiring the beauty of the monstrous machines they created to survive the end of the world.
It used to be my dream, too, you know?
Taehyun’s grip on the staff tightens, knuckles going white as he eyes the engineer gingerly stepping into the ring. “I’m sorry general, I don’t quite understand the play here.”
“There is no ‘play’ here, Kang. As you can see, I haven’t exhausted all of my options. Choi Soobin is my candidate for you– the rest, as mentioned, were selected on a near-match basis according to your technical and psych analytics.”
You’ll see what I mean remains unsaid as it hangs in the air, open to various interpretations.
He turns to regard his new opponent, can taste the waves of uncertainty and nervousness radiating from him as he shifts from one foot to the other, his palms clenching and unclenching around the bo staff. Soobin doesn’t falter– his stance ready and awaiting the signal to start.
Taehyun finally understands the reason Soobin had been at the Kwoon Room that night.
With a swift nod from General Hirai, they begin.
Taehyun charges forward, feigning a tap below the belt before swinging his staff up towards Soobin’s shoulder. Soobin’s reaction is delayed, panicked, as he tries to raise his staff to block the blow, the impact creating tremors through both of their bodies. Without missing a beat, Taehyun follows up with a strike to his midsection, taking advantage of the split-second relief that Soobin foolishly made for himself.
1-nil.
Already, he can predict the end results before the fight even reaches match point– amplified even louder by the thoughts and whispers of everyone in the room thinking the same thing.
That this is one-sided. How can someone who has left the programme years ago ever hope to achieve Drift compatibility now?
Soobin looks at him as if betrayed. Taehyun shrugs, unable to help the smug smile settling on his lips as he readies for the next attack. This is too easy , he muses to himself and mouths a ‘sorry’ to Soobin.
No hard feelings.
Taehyun garners another point by executing a flurry of strikes, aiming to overwhelm Soobin and distract him while he places a foot behind his stumbling body, bringing him to the ground in just one second.
At that moment, something within Soobin snaps, no longer suppressing the innate urge to fight. His eyes are not shaking now; rather, laser focus on the way Taehyun’s body moves, the twitch of muscles underneath flesh and the outline of his next attack already predicted.
As Taehyun aims to knock him off balance again, Soobin side-steps, pivoting on his heel as he shifts his weight, narrowly missing the staff as it swings right down to the space where his chest used to be. With a flick of his wrist, he brings the staff down in a powerful strike to the back of Taehyun’s neck.
2-1.
Taehyun staggers backwards in an attempt to put some distance between them, his heart in his mouth from the sudden turn of tides. He sees it, then: the same fiery determination in Soobin’s eyes, the intensity of it threatens to burn everything in its path, an expression he’s sure he’s wearing as well– a mirror extension of himself.
The room is charged with something unexplainable, a taste of an oncoming typhoon ready to hit. And yet Taehyun doesn’t want it to stop.
With Soobin, it’s equal parts brute strength and sharp precision, a deadly concoction– each time their staffs connect, the sound of it echoes throughout the room and drums a deep rhythm into their veins, rippling across skin. With every strike met with a block; each thrust countered with a parry, their senses are stripped from their bodies, until it no longer belongs to them, the sensations melding into one form altogether– their harsh labored breaths; the sounds of their sweat dripping onto the mat; the delicious burn of muscle from exertion; the erratic beating of their hearts, synced.
In a final surge of attack, Taehyun thrusts the staff forward, hitting the air as Soobin rolls forward and pins him down before he has a chance to react– their bodies hitting the floor and Soobin pressing the tip of the bo staff to his throat, right beneath his jugular. It leaves him breathless.
Ten-all.
The spotlight that had been focused on them finally enlarges to cover the whole room, their world coming back to them now. Everyone is talking, voices on top of one another – a mixture of disbelief and awe at the fight they had just witnessed, the heat of it burning everything around them.
The perfect firestorm.
General Hirai is smiling at them with unbridled pride that infects Taehyun, too. “Congratulations on your promotion, Rangers.”
Taehyun’s head is spinning at the coveted title– ranger . He’s a ranger now.
Beside him, Soobin is glowing despite being covered in a sheen of sweat, eyes glazed and unfocused as he finally, finally gets a taste of his dream. He turns to look at Taehyun. It’s easy to fall into each other now, knowing that there is finally someone to catch them on the other side.
An anchor to weigh them down, to hold the fort of everything they hold sacred and dear. A light that shines their way home, into hearts now open, beckoning the other to stay. A warmth that brings peace, a comfort shared.
The connection they had felt earlier was only the beginning of what was to come now that they’re bonded, equals meeting their match at last.
(He doesn’t think too much about the deep-seated seed of resentment that has taken root and is slowly growing within him, choosing to instead bask in the sought-after euphoria.)