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“Alright, so… how do you play this?”
It was a boring day on the Edge. There were no hunters in sight, no base to defend. Everything was calm. Even the twins weren’t blowing anything up. And the only reason for that was because they were busy inventing a new game which they called The-Thorston-Game-Of-Twisting-Your-Body-And-Placing-Your-Limb-On-The-Specified-Spot.
“Quite simple, actually, my one-legged friend,” Tuffnut explained, while holding up a huge white sheet, having four rows of red, blue, green and yellow spots. “A host will specify a limb and a color. The participant simply has to place said limb on the particular colour.”
“What?” Snotlout questioned dumbly.
“Let us demonstrate. Ruffnut - right leg, red,” Tuffnut commanded. Ruffnut sidled her right leg to rest on one of the red circles.
“Wait, that's it. You just have to keep your foot on some coloured spot and you win?” Astrid scoffed.
“Of course not, my friend. Your lack of faith in us is wounding. There are rules.” Ruffnut began listing on her fingers. “Rule number one: once you place your limb on a circle, you cannot move it, unless the host tells you to switch it to another colour. If you do, you’re out.”
“Rule number two: while switching, you are not allowed to place your limb on the white parts or the wrong colour. If you do, you’re out,” Tuffnut continued.
“Rule number three: if you fall, well, you’re out.”
“The last one to stay upright wins.”
“I’m not so sure about this. You’re basically jumping around on colour spots,” Heather stated.
“It wouldn't hurt to give it a try,” Fishlegs, surprisingly, quipped.
“Alright, fine. Someone better not get hurt in this,” interjected Hiccup.
“No one gets hurt in a game this simple, Hiccup.” Snotlout announced arrogantly.
“Then let the games - BEGIN!!”
“OW, OW, OW. This game sounds way easier in theory.” Snotlout, whose legs were almost doing a split, cried out.
“But it is way more relaxing practically,” said Ruffnut, who looked to be in an even more painful pose. She was bent backwards, her arms crossed above her head. One of her legs was tucked underneath her body and the other was stretched so far, it had to be cramping.
“Yeah, there’s nothing like the dull ache of a good stretch,” quipped Tuffnut, who was in a surprisingly comfortable position.
“I think its more than just a stretch,” Fishlegs retorted in a strained voice. He was in a plank, his face flushed and his arms shaking from the effort of holding his weight up.
However, the most awkward position was of Hiccup and Astrid.
Hiccup was balanced on top of Astrid, her back to his chest. His hands were on either side of her head, while his leg (the good one) was between hers. He was balancing his weight on his good leg, which meant he was pressed close to Astrid. No one knew how they ended up in that position.
“Well, don’t you two look cosy,” Snotlout commented.
Astrid growled at him and then turned slightly towards Hiccup.
“Babe, can you move your leg a little, your knee is poking me in the back.”
Hiccup turned crimson (though Astrid couldn’t see that). “Um. Actually, th-that isn’t my leg,” he stammered out.
On realising what he meant, Astrid turned the shade of Hiccup’s armour. “OH. Oh, well, I’m… flattered?” It came out more as a question than a statement.
“Oooooh, love on the playing field,” Tuffnut heckled from his comfortable position, while Snotlout made gagging noises. The colour of Fishlegs’ face was rivalling Astrid’s, whereas Heather simply gave her a smirk and a wink.
“It’s not our fault. We didn’t have a choice. We wouldn’t even be in this situation if we had a better host.”
“And who would be a better host than our current one,” Tuffnut questioned.
“Anyone who had enough of a brain to know that ‘Left leg, green’ would make things extremely awkward for some people.”
“The host is supposed to be impartial. That’s kind of the point of the game, Astrid,” Ruffnut sneered.
“Yeah, Astrid. And don’t you dare insult the host. For the host holds all the power in this game,” Tuffnut added.
“The host is a chicken!”
“No, the host is the Chicken.”
“Ugh!! Why you son of a -”
“Can we please continue the game? I think I won’t ever be able to stand up again.” Snotlout exclaimed, Fishlegs feebly agreeing with him.
Chicken, after hearing Tuffnut’s affirmation, plucked one of the sixteen cards laid out before her, and handed- well beaked- it to her companion.
“The host has chosen – Left leg, blue.” Tuffnut announced, while simply crossing his legs.
Ruffnut moved her outstretched leg to a spot slightly below and to the far left of her hip, twisting her leg at an odd angle. The rest of the gang watched in bafflement as Ruffnut didn’t seem to be in the slightest amount of pain.
Fishlegs stretched his leg outwards, sighing in relief as he could finally balance his body properly. Heather too stretched her leg outwards, which now brushed against Fishlegs’ other leg. She looked over at him and gave a shy smile, which he returned.
Astrid moved her leg comfortably to the side. However, she placed her leg on the spot that Hiccup was planning on occupying. This left him no other spot than the one next to Astrid’s torso.
Suddenly, an idea popped into his head.
Astrid was surprised (and a little peeved) when a metal leg was suddenly kept next to her torso.
“What are you doing?” Astrid demanded Hiccup.
“Placing the left leg on blue.” Hiccup replied with a smirk.
“Hey, that isn’t fair,” Snotlout shouted in outrage and disbelief.
“There is no rule stating that I couldn’t just detach my leg,” Hiccup defended.
“Tuffnut, tell him that isn’t allowed.”
“Only the host can decide what is and isn’t allowed. Chicken-what do you say?”
Chicken merely tilted her head and clucked.
“The Chicken approves. Hiccup’s move is not against the rules.”
“Oh. Come on!!”
“Snotlout, just move your leg,” Hiccup said.
“Fine,” he grumbled. He inched his leg closer to himself, shifting his torso slightly for balance. He bent his other leg to haul himself up. But it seems that it was the wrong thing to do. He tipped backwards, his arms flailing around, trying to regain his balance. There was a moment when it looked like he had regained his balance, but then he toppled over, landing on his behind.
There was a moment of silence. Then everyone except Snotlout dissolved into peals of laughter, including Chicken.
“The Chicken is amused. And Snotlout is the first one to be eliminated.”
“NO!! That is- this is- It can’t- AGHHH!!”
“Aw, poor Snottykins lost,” cackled Ruffnut, comfortable in her painful-as-Helheim pose.
“Shut up Ruffnut.”
Astrid, who was still laughing, said, “Yeah Ruffnut, lay off him. It’s not his fault he’s got short legs,” which caused a new wave of laughter.
“Alright, alright,” Hiccup, who was still on top of Astrid, called out, trying to diffuse the situation. “Let’s get on with the game before someone pulls something.”
The gang went through three more rounds before the next person fell.
“Wow, I wouldn’t have put my money on Heather being the second person eliminated,” Tuffnut commented.
Just then Ruffnut too fell. And unfortunately, Tuffnut, whose leg was tangled with Ruffnut’s, was taken down with her.
“Hey, you just cost me the game, Butt-Face.”
“It never would have happened if your hair wasn’t in my face, Bride of Grendel.”
“Troll.”
“Ugly.”
This went on for a while until Hiccup interjected.
After the twins had calmed down, everyone noticed the fact that Fishlegs, Astrid and Hiccup were the only three remaining in the game, causing Snotlout to sulk.
Hiccup, who had reattached his leg and untangled himself from Astrid, was now in a relatively comfortable position. He was squatting with his hands placed behind him.
Astrid, however, had no such luck. Her legs were spread out and her hands went beneath her legs, crossed behind her back.
Fishlegs whimpered as he stretched out his hand. He was in an inverted spread-eagle position, his back barely off the ground.
“Right leg, green,” Tuffnut announced then. Hiccup easily stretched out his leg, while Fishlegs pulled his own back in. However, as Astrid shifted her weight, she lost her balance and toppled to the ground.
“Huh, Hiccup and Fishlegs in the finals. Never would have imagined.” Tuffnut commented as Astrid let out a scream of frustration.
“This is so not fair,” Snotlout grumbled, repeating his earlier words.
“Right hand, yellow.”
Both of them comfortably placed their hands on the yellow spot.
“Right leg, red.”
Fishlegs had to cross his leg which in his current position was extremely difficult. He almost slipped and placed his foot on the white parts, but quickly recovered and successfully completed his task.
On the other hand, Hiccup had a huge problem. The only red spot he could reach was behind him. And his right leg was his good leg, so there was no chance of him removing his leg. He lifted his leg and carefully manoeuvred it. But he forgot that he had now put all his weight on the prosthetic, which got caught in the sheets, causing him to trip and tumble down on the mat, face-first.
There were a few moments of silence as everyone realised Fishlegs had won the competition.
“I can’t believe Fishface won.” Snotlout was the first to break the silence.
“I’m not surprised. He did way more complex manoeuvres as Thor Bonecrusher after all,” Hiccup defended his friend.
“The winner of The-Thorston-Game-Of-Twisting-Your-Body-And-Placing-Your-Limb-On-The-Specified-Spot is…Fishlegs,” the twins announced cheerfully, which was odd considering their defeat.
“You have to find a better, and shorter, name for it.” Astrid
“Limb-Stretcher.”
“Spine-Breaker.”
“Guys, I got it,” Tuffnut whispered theatrically. “Dance Dance Revolution.”
Everyone just blankly stared at him.
“That’s the worst and the most unrelated name I have ever heard,” Ruffnut mocked.
“Well, at least I’m contributing, unlike you, lazy-ass,” which led to the twins fighting. Again.
“Just call it Twister,” Hiccup called out, exasperatedly.