Chapter Text
The clang of metal on metal and the barking of various dogs rang out from the ruins of Ostagar.
Eryn didn’t know what to think as she stood at the base of one of the monstrous pillars. In the past two weeks, she had never felt more small, insignificant, and powerless in her life, and now she was expected to take on responsibilities and ignore what happened.
“Miss Cousland.”
Eryn jumped and returned to the present, facing Duncan. To be honest, he was more understanding and supportive than she expected. He rarely pushed her and he let her have her space when she needed it. Now they were at the camp and the Joining was near, she was seeing more of the Commander Warden she was expecting.
“Sorry, Ser,” she quickly replied, catching up with him.
Duncan gave her a curt nod before picking up the pace toward the ruins. “It’s alright, I had the same expression when I saw it my first time.” He let out a chuckle. “That was longer ago than I want to admit.”
They continued toward the bridge and Bear let out a soft ‘bwoof’ as a familiar figure started to stride toward them. Being the daughter of a Teryn had its perks and downsides. Having to meet with King Cailan frequently was both, depending on the situation.
Eryn was honestly surprised the King even remembered her. The last time they met, he was still a prince and she was still being forced to wear skirts. Her mother gave up when she turned 16. Eryn’s throat closed up at the thought of her mother.
“Lady Cousland, what brings you here? Your father and his troops were expected here a week ago,” Cailan was saying, looking concerned.
“He won’t be here,” Eryn said curtly. Dammit, she was doing what she always did when she was sad. She acted pissed instead. That was always her defense and it seemed it wasn’t going to change anytime soon.
“What? Why?”
Duncan took over the explanation, giving Eryn a warning look out of the corner of his eye.
King Cailan looked more than upset after Duncan finished the story of the Cousland’s undoing. “This is horrible. Lady Cousland, you have my word that Arl Howe will pay for what he has done. It will be the first thing I do after we defeat these darkspawn.”
Eryn nodded and thanked him before walking by him toward the bridge. She couldn’t talk about it anymore. If one more person asked about it she was going to scream.
“Alright, I would suggest getting something to eat and then resting. You will begin your Joining shortly after midday. Find a Grey Warden named Alistair when you’re ready, he will guide you in the next part.”
Eryn nodded and waited for him to walk away before letting her shoulders slump. Maker, how was she supposed to get through this again? Here she was, getting ready to become a Grey Warden, and her parents, sister-in-law, and nephew were dead. And for all she knew, Fergus was too.
Bear pressed his cold nose against her hand with a whine and she instinctively let her hand relax on his head as she scratched. Well, she could only do what she was taught to do her whole life. Slow down, and carefully take one thing at a time. Bryce Cousland preached that, which always made Eryn laugh because she knew how both of her parents were in their youth.
Eryn’s throat closed up again and she took a deep, shuddering breath. Bear leaned against her with a whine, looking up at her with big eyes. “I know, I miss them so much, but they wouldn’t want me to be like this.”
Bear barked in agreement and tugged on her sleeve. Eryn chuckled and tugged on the mabari’s ear. “Alright, food and a nap, then we’ll find this Alistair Duncan mentioned.”
Eryn woke to the feeling of Bear’s slobber running down her cheek. She wiped it off with an exasperated sigh and she stared up at Bear’s panting face.
“I’m up! Get your dog breath out of my face,” she laughed.
Bear sat on his haunches and cocked his head, acting innocent.
“Cheek,” Eryn muttered as she slipped on the heavier parts of her armor. She buckled on her daggers and quiver and grabbed her bow. She stepped out of her tent into the bright, midday sunlight and started to search for Alistair. Duncan had mentioned him frequently on their trip down here, so she had a feeling she would know him if she actually saw and talked to him.
She asked many soldiers, mages, and Maker knows who else before someone pointed her toward a ramp leading to an upper part of the ruins. Eryn looked around with wide eyes as she walked through the ruins. They were beautiful and it made her wonder what they looked like in their glory days.
She finally heard voices and she made her way towards them. She reached the uppermost tier of the ruins and she couldn’t help but wonder what was going on.
A mage and who she assumed was Alistair were having a heated argument. Well, the mage was getting upset and Alistair was being a cheek.
“What is it now? Haven’t Grey Wardens already asked enough of the Circle?”
“I simply came to deliver a message from the Revered Mother, Ser Mage. She desires your presence.”
Eryn didn’t know what was going on exactly so she took that time to study the person who was supposed to help her through this intricate process that was the Joining. Just looking at him told her he knew how to use every weapon he had on him. He had a thick, strong build that was perfect for the sword and shield he carried. The face though…something was familiar about this man’s face.
The nose and the broad, strong jaw and chin reminded her of someone, but she couldn’t think of who. She shook it off as something her tired, grieving mind was making up and she waited for him to be finished.
“Your glibness does you no credit.”
Alistair smirked and Eryn felt her stomach flip a little. Maker’s breath, she really must be losing her mind. She was never one to become a fawning maiden over a pretty face. This man had that boyish, crooked grin that she always seemed to notice more than others, though. She hastily crushed the feelings and focused on the task at hand. She had to become a Grey Warden so she could do what her parents wanted her to do. She had to make the difference they wanted her to make. She had to focus on doing the best she could, not on the boyishly handsome face of her fellow Grey Warden.
“And here I was thinking we were getting along so well. I was even going to name one of my children after you. The grumpy one.”
Eryn couldn’t help it. She barely managed to stifle a snicker before it could escape.
“Enough, I will speak to the woman if I must. Get out of my way, fool,” the mage spat, stomping away.
The clink of armor made Eryn look back at the Grey Warden instead of the mage’s retreating back. Dammit, that boyish grin was back. “You know, one good thing about the Blight is how it brings people together.”
Eryn quirked a brow. So not only was this man capable of being a little shit, he was a sarcastic little shit. She had a feeling they would get along. Before she and Duncan reached Ostagar, Eryn told herself to try to accept how her life was going and to try to get along with the other Wardens. It wasn’t their fault her life went to shit so fast, but she was sure they could help her.
Maybe it was a good thing she met Alistair first, his sarcastic demeanor was a breath of fresh air.
“I know exactly what you mean,” Eryn joked back, crossing her arms.
That boyish grin came back with vengeance. Oh Maker, his eyes crinkled at the edges when he smiled too. “It’s like a big party. We can all stand in a circle and hold hands. That would give the darkspawn something to think about.” He paused and stepped a little closer, brow scrunching a little. “Wait, we haven’t met, have we? I don’t suppose you happen to be another mage?”
The humorous glint in his eye was enough to make Eryn grin. “Would that make your day worse?”
“Ha! I only like to know my chances of being turned into a frog or not.”
Bear decided to let out a short woof at that moment and Alistair glanced down at the mabari. “Hold on, you must be that new recruit Duncan wrote about.” He paused and Eryn had to keep herself composed as he shuffled his feet and rubbed the back of his head. “I should have recognized you right away I apologize.”
Eryn held her hand out. “Eryn. Eryn Cousland.” She glanced down at Bear when he nudged against her. “And this is Bear.”
Alistair’s grin brightened again and Eryn wondered how that mage could ever get angry at him. He was polite for the most part. “Right! That was the name.” Alistair gestured to her and started to walk down the ramp toward the main part of the camp.
“You know…it just occurred to me that there have never been many women in the Grey Wardens. I wonder why that is?”
Eryn hummed in thought. “Probably because we’re too smart for you.”
Alistair arched a brow. “Oh, and what does that make you?”
Eryn sheepishly tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. “Just one of the boys?”
Alistair threw his head back and laughed and Eryn couldn’t help but smile. She definitely could see herself being friends with Alistair.
“So…was I interrupting something when I came here?” she asked.
“Oh no, the Circle is here on the King’s request and the Chantry doesn’t like that one bit.” His face turned down into the first frown she saw from him. “They just love letting mages know how unwelcome they are, which puts me in an awkward position. I was once a Templar.”
Eryn arched a brow. She was surprised the Chantry let one of their Templars go to the Wardens. “I suppose that would make things slightly awkward.”
The Warden chuckled. “You have no idea. Anyway, I’m going to be accompanying you throughout all of this, so if you have any questions, feel free to ask.”
Eryn bit her lip and decided to just get this part over with. “Can you tell me more of the Joining? What exactly is involved?”
Alistair grimaced with a sigh. “I cannot tell you much, I’m sorry.”
A pout formed on Eryn’s lips before she could stop it. It wasn’t his fault and he probably wanted to follow the rules, since he just joined the order himself. “It’s alright, I understand,” she paused and decided to clear the awkward air that formed, “So tell me about yourself. You joined six month ago?”
Her fellow Warden looked shocked. “How did-“
“Duncan spoke of you on our way here.”
Eryn almost didn’t know what to do when Alistair rubbed the back of his head with a goofy grin on his face. “Really? I hope it was only good things.”
They ran into Daveth and Eryn’s mood went south with him.
Eryn sometimes forgot how lecherous men could be. “You watch my back, and I’ll watch yours,” she was saying, trying to be nice.
“I’ll be watching your back alright,” Daveth replied with a wink.
Eryn’s lip curled at Daveth’s confident smirk. Before she was thinking, she reached out and grabbed the collar of the twit’s leather shirt and shoved him up against the post behind him. “What was that?” she growled, glaring up at him.
Damn, and here she hoped she would give a good first impression to her fellow Wardens.