Chapter Text
“Ho, ho, ho…oh, almost done with another year of this thankless job. Luckily, it’s only for one night, then I have my loyal lackeys do the heavy lifting for me until next year. Anyway, what’s my last stop? Ho ho, Phantomhive Manor? Why, I haven't been there in two years. Strange, I thought everyone perished in that household. Oh, what’s the harm, at least it’s only one child. Off, my trusty reindeer, to the Phantomhive Manor!”
“Christmas tinsel, I hate the old chimneys. They’re always a tight squeeze but I always manage to fit myself in. Just a bit more…Ahhh, I'm all the way in. now to deliver these presents and—"
“Welcome to Phantomhive Manor.”
“Dah! Wha…who are…???”
“Is it important that I introduce myself when it is customary for the guest, vandal or not, to do so first?”
“‘Vandal’! Now see here, I am no vandal.”
“Oh? Then what shall I call one who infiltrates someone’s domicile without permission?”
“Erm…everyone knows who I am without my need for introduction.”
“Tis not what I asked. What shall…I call one…who infiltrates…someone’s domicile…without…permission…?”
“Wait, you needn’t get so close. My name is Santa.”
“Ah, Mister Santa! I am Sebastian, the overseer of the manor. And dare I say I am one hell of a—"
“Why are you awake?”
“…Pardon?”
“My job is to deliver gifts to sleeping households. As a matter of fact, anyone who sees me depletes some of my magic, yet I feel normal.”
“Ah, I may have an explanation for that. For you see, I am no mere human.”
“That…would explain it. Well then, I shall deliver these presents and be on my way, kind sir.”
“Not so fast, Mister Santa. I have been bestowed a task by Master Phantomhive.”
“A task?”
“Master Phantomhive and the other fellows of Phantomhive Manor are taking a respite in the balmy region of India (cut to Ciel with an annoyed expression as the others are having fun on the beach) and as the overseer upon his return, his final words to me were to ‘have fun.’ I am unfamiliar with such customs, however, I do have my own methods of enjoyment.”
“I do not understand what I have to do with that. My job is to bring smiles to the children of the world. Incidentally, my dear boy, you are not a child.”
“How astute of you to take notice of my rather masculine physique.”
“(sigh) I apologize, I have nothing for you. Now, I shall complete my job, if you please.”
“Oh, but Mister Santa, surely you are no stranger to the concept of self-gratification.”
“Oh…well, I—"
“Is it so wrong to indulge from time to time?”
“See here, you rapscallion. I have a missus that is expecting my return post haste. Now if you will excuse me…”
“And what does your missus do for you?”
“Cease your prying. That is none of your business.”
“So, it has been at least a fortnight.”
“Grrrf!”
“Mister Santa, you have been going on about this job you have to do. However, nothing has stopped you from said job. It is clear…something else…is keeping you here…”
“Um…”
“Your body is yearning for something.”
“I—"
“What are your desires, mister Santa?”
(lustful breath)
“My, such a luscious beard. Soft, supple skin.”
(slow panting)
“Oh my, such a large package rubbing against my thigh. But I’m not ready for the delivery.”
“Steady your breaths, mister Santa. Relax your body. Let me release your desires.”
“Sir, if we continue, you know not you may release upon the world.”
“Yet you’re not saying to stop…”
“All right, if we’re going to do this, we’re going to do this right. Ho-ho-holy night!!!”
*In a flash, Santa transforms into a 10-foot, super-Santa. Rippling muscles, hard abs, pecs, and erect penis, Santa looks down at Sebastian with a sly smirk. Enticed by the large man’s visage, Sebastian turns into his true demon form, matching his height. Seeing the demon in his dark glory, super-Santa’s manhood twitches, his pulse races. Sebastian notices and quickly gets behind super-Santa readying himself to ram the man in his tight posterior. He
licks super-Santa’s neck while groping his chest. With his other hand, Sebastian slides it in between his firm buttocks slightly opening it slowly trying to enter. Super-Santa quickly turns around, staring the demon in the eyes. He slams Sebastian against the wall, looks down at his moist lips, and kisses the demon hard. He strongly grips Sebastian’s cock and starts to jerk it in a rhythmic motion. Sebastian stiffens his body, fighting against his natural urges. However, not wanting to be outdone, the demon slips a finger into super-Santa’s anus, twisting it to get it in deeper. Both men breathe heavily into each other’s mouths
while matching the other's voracity. Sebastian stops super-Santa from massaging his sex. He pulls out his finger, grabs super Santa by the arms and forces him onto a wall on the opposite side of the room. The demon smiles slyly, pushes super-Santa onto his knees, and rams his massive cock down the man’s throat. super-Santa gags, spittle shooting from his mouth, but he doesn’t fight it. Sebastian thrusts faster and harder, causing the back of super-Santa’s head to hit the wall. Super-Santa holds onto Sebastian’s derriere, motioning Sebastian to go deeper. Shocked, Sebastian feels himself starting to drip. He pulls out super-Santa’s throat. Sebastian pulls him off the floor, presses super-Santa’s body against the wall, and shoves his sex inside his buttocks while also tugging super-Santa’s penis. Super-Santa arches back, grabs and vigorously strokes Sebastian’s horns. Sebastian pumps faster, super-Santa strokes faster. And with a final thrust, a thick blanket of freshly fallen snow descends upon the Phantomhive Manor.*
“My apologies, mister Santa, I have taken up too much of your time. Here is your lovely red sack. Please, by all means, carry on about your task. And our rendezvous shall stay between us.”
“Yes…yes, quite right. Have a merry Christmas.”
“Oh, I will, kind sir.”
2 days later
“Welcome home, master. How was your respite?”
“Ugh, I don’t want to speak of it. Incidentally, how did the plan fair?”
“As usual, you are the perfect mastermind. I retrieved the item you requested. Mister Santa was none the wiser.” (hands over the magical red bag)
“Hopefully you brought him no harm.”
“I left no visible scars.”
“Yes, well. As long as you completed what I asked. Next year, we will finally capture Santa. Then infiltrate his homebase. We will be Santa. Are you prepared for that?”
“Quite, young master. After all, I am one hell of a butler.”